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User: Ukab+the+Great

Ukab+the+Great's activity in the archive.

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Comments · 1,473

  1. Proposed Categories on AU Classification Board To Censor Mobile Apps · · Score: 4, Funny

    No need to worry yet. Perhaps the categories will be

    1. Boobies
    2. Extra Boobies
    3. Mediocre girl-girl
    4. Wicked Awesome girl-girl
    5. Why would you pay 99 cents for that boring thing, mate?

  2. Elements Song on Element 114 Verified · · Score: 2, Funny

    Upon reading the headline, my first thought was "dammit, now Tom Lehrer's Elements Song is even further behind."

  3. 48kbps sucks on 1/3 of People Can't Tell 48Kbps Audio From 160Kbps · · Score: 1

    True audiophiles know that it's only past 120kbps that Bob Dylan speaks coherent English.

  4. "Klingons and the Romulans Pose No Threat To Us" on Why Charles Stross Hates Star Trek · · Score: 1
  5. With a patented algorithm on FBI Bringing Biometric Photo Scanning To North Carolina, Via DMV · · Score: 3, Funny

    It will recognize threats to society like terrorists, illegal aliens, and UNC fans.

  6. Re:Pumpkins on Gigantic Air Gun To Blast Cargo Into Orbit · · Score: 1

    An African or a European pumpkin?

  7. Re:You don't know who they are, or where they are. on Squatters Abusing iPhone App Store · · Score: 1

    By holding for ransom my plans to release an app named
    iPhoneiPhoneBoBiPhoneBananaFanaFoFiPhoneMeMiMoMifoneiPhone

  8. Bad Economy on NASA Downgrades Asteroid-Earth Collision Risk · · Score: 4, Funny

    Even the chance of an apocalypse is being downsized.

  9. Re:Good thing... on NASA Discovers Giant Ring Around Saturn · · Score: 2, Funny

    Because then you'd need to spend some $$$ on asteroid cream.

  10. I'll wait for the Ang Lee Documentary on Dam Burst Tool Disables China's Green Dam Censorware · · Score: 1, Interesting

    "Bursting Dam, Flying Dutch Boy"

  11. Re:Multiple Inheritance Is Duct Tape on The Duct Tape Programmer · · Score: 1

    Objective-C, actually. Were I a Java programmer, there wouldn't have been the second and third qualifiers between parentheses in my original post.

  12. Multiple Inheritance Is Duct Tape on The Duct Tape Programmer · · Score: 1

    I've always viewed multiple inheritance as the hallmark of duct-tape programming. Being (correctly) forced to do single inheritance forces you to do proper architecture (but not architecture for architecture's sake), abstraction (within reason), and seriously think about the structure of your program.

    There's nothing more duct tape then slamming a bunch of random classes together into one class.

  13. Re:So, does the Duct Tape Programmer... on The Duct Tape Programmer · · Score: 4, Funny

    Not really. I've seen way too much duct tape python and ruby code.

  14. What's In A Name on Intel To Challenge Android With Moblin For Mobile Devices · · Score: 1, Informative

    From Moblin's site:

    Moblin uses Clutter to create exciting, efficient, and intuitive user interfaces.

    Worthy competitor to Android, let alone Apple? Not a chance, and you can tell just by looking at the name that was chosen for the UI. But they'd probably have a good shot at Failblog.

  15. Re:Didn't they watch Dr. Strangelove? on Soviets Built a Doomsday Machine; It's Still Alive · · Score: 4, Funny

    If you tell everyong about it, the liberals will try to interfere with our right to bear doomsday devices by either adding a 3 day waiting-period for mad scientists or by classifying them as "assault rifles".

  16. The real story on Feds Ask IT Execs To Throw Away Cellphones After Visiting China · · Score: 5, Funny

    The real story in the article should be "CTO of world's largest Windows security software company uses a mac."

  17. Paradoxically on Girls Wired To Fear Dangerous Animals · · Score: 1

    The phobia doesn't extend to frat boys, bikers, and republican congressmen.

  18. Re:Misses the point on Risk Aversion At Odds With Manned Space Exploration · · Score: 4, Interesting

    According to this article your lifetime chance of dying in a car crash is 1 in 83.

    Per-person odds, I'd take a one-time shuttle ride over a lifetime of driving.

  19. Slashdot's Next on Facebook Ordered To Turn Over Source Code · · Score: 0

    Slashdot is infringing on my patent of encoding information about people, places in a binary format that uses the numbers 1 and 0.

  20. Instead Of Getting Help on Trapped Girls Call For Help On Facebook · · Score: 3, Funny

    They might have gotten 112,076 "fans of teenage girls trapped in wells."

  21. Re:Is there anything on iPhone App Wins Microsoft-Campus Programming Contest · · Score: 1

    Let 3rd party apps disable 911 functionality?

    Let 3rd party apps make the keypad 5 pixels high and completely destroy the ability to use it as a phone?

    Run background tasks that interfere with your ability to receive an important business call?

  22. Duck Noises? Ha! on Tour Companies Battle Over Trademarked Duck Noises · · Score: 1

    I've got the patent on fart noises made by six year-olds, beyotches!

  23. Sounds Familiar on Augmented Reality In a Contact Lens · · Score: 1

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rainbows_End

    I deeply fear an Elmo belief circle.

  24. Re:Why is this a surprise? on EA Spends 3x More On Marketing Than Development · · Score: 2, Funny

    Using well-tested, modular women who can easily make extensible and interchangeable baby parts, you might be able to add a several women and grow a baby up to 40% faster. Of course, you'd have diminishing returns due to communication overhead once you get past four women.

  25. Easy Explanation on Astrophysicists Find "Impossible" Planet · · Score: 1

    It's only a model.