Not having already preemptively sent me a friend request I'm going to consider a micro-aggression. You didn't even give me a trigger warning you insensitive clod.
You lay cable/put up a cell tower in Africa, next morning it gets sold for scrap. You lay fiber optic cable, they dig it up for the copper. You relay fiber optic cable..they dig it up for the copper again. It doesn't really matter that there is none.
Break the va-jay-jay cartel! Free men from ever having to put up with a woman's crap to get laid ever again. A lot of women should be terrified, they might have to get by on their personality.
First off make sure all the people in charge are technically illiterate. As a matter of fact it's better if they are laughably useless at even operating their own machines for even their small e-mail and spreadsheet requirements. To do it properly you don't have to actually be able to do the work hands on yourself but you have to have enough brains to do a technical job, make sure they are actual morons in charge. Moronic Bloody Assholes may be shortened to MBA on the resumes, those are the ones you want. MBAs who go around spewing idiocy like "You don't have to be technical to manage technical people" they are awesome for lowering morale. First of all it establishes that the company thinks you are less than this half-wit. It also keeps them from getting any ideas that they may one day get a meaningful promotion in their own field over someone who can't even use a computer. Since these explaining what the fuck is happening minute by minute to these people is a full time job they won't engage in any productive activities that would likely result in you having to give them a raise. Make sure you over hype those tiny perks while their effective compensation shrinks due to frozen raises for the workers who have to handhold these morons in charge through their day. Give the counter productive morons big raises. In fact when they screw up so badly that you have to fire them make sure you give them a huge pay out. It has to be a larger payout for their fuckup than any technical person gets for doing their job in an exemplary fashion. Take away all their workspace, storage space and privacy, while open concept half cubicles have been scientifically proven detrimental to productivity..fuck it do it anyway. Make sure junior people in other departments keep their work space. When you lay off good workers make sure you keep the managers that made them noncompetitive and make them vendor managers. Get them to make training resources and work to train the unskilled foreign labour that will replace them. Make sure that people in other departments with less responsibility and lower performance get raises and promotions.
When they come strutting into your office for their annual review with a big pile of awards for the amazing work they did, give them an average for a rating, this works awesome when the person actually sets a company record. Give them a reason you made up by randomly selecting business jargon, "sure you saved the company a few million dollars but you were too vertically oriented in your approach to the interdisciplinary RACI Matrix". ITIL, if spastic computer illiterate government accountants came up with an IT governance strategy..it would still be better than ITIL . If you like ITIL you probably wear a tie to work every day and someone should take away your computer before you hurt yourself.
Read the synopsis of a bunch of business books and throw around a bunch of terms from management fads. If they get on board and try to implement what you requested just switch to a different management fad and leave them twisting in the wind. We come up with management fads to get you to do things not to get us working together like it says in the manual..yeah we didn't read that manual.
The basic cycle is to get them to come up with cost saving measures, say you're going to implement them until the expensive prep work is all done and then change your mind for no logical reason, rinse, repeat.
When you waste all the money they saved in spite of you tell them they are a cost centre and cut their budget.
If they do anything but grin ear to ear about this whole mess, tell them they have a bad attitude.
Refuse to come up with any solutions or any vision, whenever someone comes up with a creative, cheap solution don't even give them the respect of a real reply just a blank imbecile stare. You may have to practice in the mirror but if you're from a business background chances are you have this one down pat.
This is a patent pending set of business processes. As soon as the patent comes through I'll be suing 90% of the corporations for stealing my technology.
Someone should make them look like the losers that they are. Didn't get invited to any of the cool parties eh? They're just the sniveling little snot nosed bastards who used to rat out the class when the teacher left the room. Someone should build a medical die (like the die packs used for bank robbers) trap and use their monitoring of private communications to lure them in and die them purple for a few weeks. YouTube stream it live for extra yuks.
If iTunes picks up this contract and becomes the place where you can get all this stuff and not just another channel then Netflix might as well board up the windows now.
What I would do is to force people to pay market rate and then tax them on that. You provide an incentive for training people and promoting from within while still allowing companies access to skills from the international labour pool.
Works perfectly on windows on my machine for over a decade. I reboot like once a month on my laptop. Rule 1 when I'm building a UI is don't lose their shit. Rule 2 is no one cares about your fucking excuses.
The successful candidate will be highly skilled in ethical gymnastics. Are you looking to sell out your country for the ends of the current malignant government? Are you unable or unwilling to follow even the basic principals of the constitution? (Preference given to those that haven't even read it.) Does calling you a patriot or vague warnings about terrorism motivate you to do even the shittiest most underhanded things to innocent people? Are you highly talented in moral ambiguity and a motivated hypocrite? We have the job for you.
We keep running around fighting fires instead of fighting arsonists . The people who want to maintain the exploitation market (you didn't think it was actual artists getting paid did you?) will just try again and again and win a victory of a thousand cuts eventually. We need to put them in cages at the very least. This is a losing battle the way it's being fought. We should pick one of the very sleazy operators like Sony and keep going after them through a multitude of approaches and just keep coming until they no longer exist. Make their name a synonym for when the population turns on a corporation and irrevocably crushes it into the dirt. Make every corporation on earth fear getting Sony'd.
The way you've been conditioned to think about conflict are the values of the exploited and defeated population. Greenfield your preconceptions. Fight the dirty fight and win or they will.
Maybe they won't pay an army of lobbyists to bribe the shit out of the government so they can perpetuate an obsolete business model and charge people up the ass for services that are no longer needed. Nah just kidding, let's watch them pocket the extra money like they earned it and screw the customer even harder.
Here's what you can learn from this security expert. If you click on those attachments we told you not to click on it will take me 2 days with your laptop to "analyze the threat" if you get infected. If it's not the first time then we were unable to recover your files and it will take 3 days.
They sell 20 year maintenance agreements on train control systems. We had AS/400s booting off 8 inch floppies in the year 2000. I was their OS/2 1.2 expert in 2000. None of that new fangled warp crap for us.
If people see it as just a corporate forum it will implode. Free(ish) expression is the bait, the lured users are the product and the advertisers are the customers. If you don't have good bait, no users and soon no advertisers. Giving the hive mind a lobotomy is not going to work, we'll just put a pillow over its face. If you do Web 2.0 correctly the users are the star of the show. Reddit is taking centre stage here and it's a bad plan.
Yeah I'm not really interested in being an app coder at any price someone with half a brain would pay.
Anyone willing to pay me what I'd ask to dust off my average level programming skills would be dumb and working with stupid people is not on my road to job satisfaction.
A corporation has the rights of an individual so I will register under the corporation's name and address and not a person's name. Again only small business owners get the shit end of the stick. Way to go ICANN, if you keep proving how irrelevant you are I may get my Christmas wish and you can all pound sand.
When people hear that I can program apps I often get hassled by someone who of course has the next multi million dollar idea. I'm not interested but they rarely take no for an answer.
I've said directly to people that if I'm smart enough and disciplined enough to actually build an app chances are I'm smart enough to have 5 ideas better than theirs and if they really were smart then I'd be happy to recommend a book. People think there is some idea shortage out there. I like asking them about their "spec" because they almost never have anything but vague bar room banter and haven't even thought that out particularly well.
Reading makes their lips tired and no one ever takes me up on the book recommendation. Most apps pitched are already out or are outside the physical abilities of the phone. Maybe it's because I'm a bitter old man but I love showing them the app they just described and watching their little hearts break.
Slashdot Mirror
Not having already preemptively sent me a friend request I'm going to consider a micro-aggression.
You didn't even give me a trigger warning you insensitive clod.
Actually useless would be a step up. They are actively detrimental to competition and innovation.
You lay cable/put up a cell tower in Africa, next morning it gets sold for scrap.
You lay fiber optic cable, they dig it up for the copper. You relay fiber optic cable..they dig it up for the copper again. It doesn't really matter that there is none.
Break the va-jay-jay cartel! Free men from ever having to put up with a woman's crap to get laid ever again.
A lot of women should be terrified, they might have to get by on their personality.
First off make sure all the people in charge are technically illiterate. As a matter of fact it's better if they are laughably useless at even operating their own machines for even their small e-mail and spreadsheet requirements. To do it properly you don't have to actually be able to do the work hands on yourself but you have to have enough brains to do a technical job, make sure they are actual morons in charge. Moronic Bloody Assholes may be shortened to MBA on the resumes, those are the ones you want. MBAs who go around spewing idiocy like "You don't have to be technical to manage technical people" they are awesome for lowering morale. First of all it establishes that the company thinks you are less than this half-wit. It also keeps them from getting any ideas that they may one day get a meaningful promotion in their own field over someone who can't even use a computer. Since these explaining what the fuck is happening minute by minute to these people is a full time job they won't engage in any productive activities that would likely result in you having to give them a raise.
Make sure you over hype those tiny perks while their effective compensation shrinks due to frozen raises for the workers who have to handhold these morons in charge through their day. Give the counter productive morons big raises. In fact when they screw up so badly that you have to fire them make sure you give them a huge pay out. It has to be a larger payout for their fuckup than any technical person gets for doing their job in an exemplary fashion.
Take away all their workspace, storage space and privacy, while open concept half cubicles have been scientifically proven detrimental to productivity..fuck it do it anyway. Make sure junior people in other departments keep their work space.
When you lay off good workers make sure you keep the managers that made them noncompetitive and make them vendor managers. Get them to make training resources and work to train the unskilled foreign labour that will replace them. Make sure that people in other departments with less responsibility and lower performance get raises and promotions.
When they come strutting into your office for their annual review with a big pile of awards for the amazing work they did, give them an average for a rating, this works awesome when the person actually sets a company record. Give them a reason you made up by randomly selecting business jargon, "sure you saved the company a few million dollars but you were too vertically oriented in your approach to the interdisciplinary RACI Matrix".
ITIL, if spastic computer illiterate government accountants came up with an IT governance strategy..it would still be better than ITIL . If you like ITIL you probably wear a tie to work every day and someone should take away your computer before you hurt yourself.
Read the synopsis of a bunch of business books and throw around a bunch of terms from management fads. If they get on board and try to implement what you requested just switch to a different management fad and leave them twisting in the wind. We come up with management fads to get you to do things not to get us working together like it says in the manual..yeah we didn't read that manual.
The basic cycle is to get them to come up with cost saving measures, say you're going to implement them until the expensive prep work is all done and then change your mind for no logical reason, rinse, repeat.
When you waste all the money they saved in spite of you tell them they are a cost centre and cut their budget.
If they do anything but grin ear to ear about this whole mess, tell them they have a bad attitude.
Refuse to come up with any solutions or any vision, whenever someone comes up with a creative, cheap solution don't even give them the respect of a real reply just a blank imbecile stare. You may have to practice in the mirror but if you're from a business background chances are you have this one down pat.
This is a patent pending set of business processes. As soon as the patent comes through I'll be suing 90% of the corporations for stealing my technology.
Someone should make them look like the losers that they are. Didn't get invited to any of the cool parties eh?
They're just the sniveling little snot nosed bastards who used to rat out the class when the teacher left the room.
Someone should build a medical die (like the die packs used for bank robbers) trap and use their monitoring of private communications to lure them in and die them purple for a few weeks. YouTube stream it live for extra yuks.
If iTunes picks up this contract and becomes the place where you can get all this stuff and not just another channel then Netflix might as well board up the windows now.
What I would do is to force people to pay market rate and then tax them on that.
You provide an incentive for training people and promoting from within while still allowing companies access to skills from the international labour pool.
Works perfectly on windows on my machine for over a decade.
I reboot like once a month on my laptop.
Rule 1 when I'm building a UI is don't lose their shit.
Rule 2 is no one cares about your fucking excuses.
I have a unique technique.
The successful candidate will be highly skilled in ethical gymnastics.
Are you looking to sell out your country for the ends of the current malignant government?
Are you unable or unwilling to follow even the basic principals of the constitution? (Preference given to those that haven't even read it.)
Does calling you a patriot or vague warnings about terrorism motivate you to do even the shittiest most underhanded things to innocent people?
Are you highly talented in moral ambiguity and a motivated hypocrite? We have the job for you.
We keep running around fighting fires instead of fighting arsonists
.
The people who want to maintain the exploitation market (you didn't think it was actual artists getting paid did you?) will just try again and again and win a victory of a thousand cuts eventually. We need to put them in cages at the very least. This is a losing battle the way it's being fought.
We should pick one of the very sleazy operators like Sony and keep going after them through a multitude of approaches and just keep coming until they no longer exist.
Make their name a synonym for when the population turns on a corporation and irrevocably crushes it into the dirt.
Make every corporation on earth fear getting Sony'd.
The way you've been conditioned to think about conflict are the values of the exploited and defeated population. Greenfield your preconceptions. Fight the dirty fight and win or they will.
Just let the cyclists have right of way like in Amsterdam.
You can walk on the bike path but they will shoulder check you off the path.
Your fault, your problem.
Source: walking around Amsterdam feelin' kinda groovy, only got hit twice.
Maybe they won't pay an army of lobbyists to bribe the shit out of the government so they can perpetuate an obsolete business model and charge people up the ass for services that are no longer needed. Nah just kidding, let's watch them pocket the extra money like they earned it and screw the customer even harder.
Here's what you can learn from this security expert. If you click on those attachments we told you not to click on it will take me 2 days with your laptop to "analyze the threat" if you get infected. If it's not the first time then we were unable to recover your files and it will take 3 days.
They sell 20 year maintenance agreements on train control systems.
We had AS/400s booting off 8 inch floppies in the year 2000.
I was their OS/2 1.2 expert in 2000. None of that new fangled warp crap for us.
Its long term effects are not known. I should know what I'm putting in my mouth and then I can vote with my wallet.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/...
What's the deal with this?
Isn't Perl considered child abuse in most states?
If people see it as just a corporate forum it will implode.
Free(ish) expression is the bait, the lured users are the product and the advertisers are the customers.
If you don't have good bait, no users and soon no advertisers.
Giving the hive mind a lobotomy is not going to work, we'll just put a pillow over its face.
If you do Web 2.0 correctly the users are the star of the show. Reddit is taking centre stage here and it's a bad plan.
Yeah I'm not really interested in being an app coder at any price someone with half a brain would pay.
Anyone willing to pay me what I'd ask to dust off my average level programming skills would be dumb and working with stupid people is not on my road to job satisfaction.
A corporation has the rights of an individual so I will register under the corporation's name and address and not a person's name.
Again only small business owners get the shit end of the stick.
Way to go ICANN, if you keep proving how irrelevant you are I may get my Christmas wish and you can all pound sand.
When people hear that I can program apps I often get hassled by someone who of course has the next multi million dollar idea. I'm not interested but they rarely take no for an answer.
I've said directly to people that if I'm smart enough and disciplined enough to actually build an app chances are I'm smart enough to have 5 ideas better than theirs and if they really were smart then I'd be happy to recommend a book. People think there is some idea shortage out there. I like asking them about their "spec" because they almost never have anything but vague bar room banter and haven't even thought that out particularly well.
Reading makes their lips tired and no one ever takes me up on the book recommendation. Most apps pitched are already out or are outside the physical abilities of the phone.
Maybe it's because I'm a bitter old man but I love showing them the app they just described and watching their little hearts break.
Can I get the force of law behind my imaginary friend?
Get in contact with PayPal customer support..bahahahahahah!
You could also get a hold of big foot and have him just beat them to death with a unicorn. My way is more plausible.
Japanese porn will enter a new golden age and the eels can be saved for sushi.
Yeah there were some really scummy people trying to get rich off Silk Road.
http://www.cnn.com/2015/03/30/...