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seems like you get around a lot

Kidding aside, I absolutely agree with you. I think Dean Kootz put it best in his novel "Sieze the Night" when he stated that the collective intelligence of a family drops 5 IQ points per TV in a household.

You Sanctimonius Prick

What the fuck? This was blatantly ripped from this week's Onion. At least try to be creative in your trolls.

REPORT: TV HELPS BUILD VALUABLE LOOKING SKILLS

NEW YORK--A report released Monday by NYU's Center For Media Studies has found that television, accused by experts of diminishing children's attention spans and discouraging them from interacting with others, can actually help children as young as six months develop essential looking skills.

(...snip...)

See the news outlet linked above for rest. They were on top of this shit back in 1999.

Researchers discover that television improves valuable looking skills.

This article immediately reminded me of an Onion article a while back... it's scary how reality mirrors this parody...

Unfortunately, that standard is patent-encumbered.

Stop watching it. Doing so will change your life. I'm not joking. Watching TV conditions you for the worse, and the only way you'll know I'm not making this up is to go without for 2 months.

And, not watching television will give you something to mention to people on a regular basis.

Hey , letters can do whatever the hell they want!

Looks like one of those unfunny Onion wannabes who only make the superiority of The Onion painfully obvious. This is another one. (Tip: read Our Dumb Century to get an idea of how good those Onion guys actually are.)

JP

Looks like one of those unfunny Onion wannabes who only make the superiority of The Onion painfully obvious. This is another one. (Tip: read Our Dumb Century to get an idea of how good those Onion guys actually are.)

JP

Forgive me if this is off topic, but this is the first time I've seen "The Lemon" before... After seeing thier little "Desperate Personals" and trying to place where I have seen that same kind of thing before I began thinking: Am I correct in thinking that this is, in fact, a parody of a parody?

There was a time when I thought the internet could be no more ironic... I beleive I was wrong in that assumption.

A highlight:

Did Yarosh, Cauchy or Kummer--or even Euler, for that matter--care that I was French? Or that I was born in 1637 in Castres? Okay, Euler might have. At first, he seemed different from the others. He'd spend every waking moment thinking about me. Oh, how that made me feel! But understand me? No. In the end, he was just like the rest, interested only in what I could do for his career.

So was this accurate?

I don't know about the rest of you, but when I got here all I saw was a large blue

"YES!"

right under the question, "is SCO litigating itself into irrelevance?"

(It's actually part of an Intel ad, but hey...it's a good magic-8 ball to me).

This company reminds me of this article. What makes them think they have enough clout to even attempt this? They're going to bully IBM?

The programming language (or schoolbus :-D) of future..

Ish*t, is not active atm, but you can check out his setup, to let people flush his toilet from a browser ;)
Here you can read a comparison of the internet and a toilet...
Always amusing Onion, has an article on online sh*tting ;)

Man, I gotta pull myself together and get some work done :P

[The Last Starfigher] is a movie that was pretty dear to me

I liked it, too. Apparently, we aren't the only ones.

Children, Creepy Middle-Aged Wierdos Swept Up In Harry Potter Craze

20 Percent Of Area Man's Income Spent Ironically

There's another real gem on there in this mold, but I can't find it.

Children, Creepy Middle-Aged Wierdos Swept Up In Harry Potter Craze

20 Percent Of Area Man's Income Spent Ironically

There's another real gem on there in this mold, but I can't find it.

There's an excellent Onion article that I feel addresses this point rather well: "Stoner Uncle All The Kids' Favorite". If you cut it down to the essential element children enjoy people who aren't uptight and can still bother to enjoy themselves. If you were used to the idea of your parents enjoying the same things you did then it might not seem so odd. I recall in particular a friend's father who played Nintendo with him as well and wishing that my father was that cool. My mother having been admonished after staying up all night one time (shortly after getting it and never again) playing her way through Gyromite probably didn't help though.

Slowly, a nervous nation got on with the business of daily life in the twin shadows of anthrax and the war in Afghanistan. As they are wont to do, the political pundits coined post-9/11 life as the "new normalcy."

But no one was laughing.

Thankfully, on Sept. 26, the irreverent satirists at a popular web site called The Onion broke the ice.

Since this is a family column, I won't repeat the title of the Onion's tongue-in-cheek report on 9/11. Let's just say that these guys had the chutzpah to say out loud what we all were thinking.

The Onion's outrageous humor set us free. As word got out, you could hear the belly-laughs from coast to coast -- along with the much needed sighs of relief.

Way to go for the Onion approach to Slashdot commenting.

Please provide additional hypothetical examples of something that pretty much everyone understands to reinforce ad nauseum a point that (once again) everyone understands.

Sorry to vent, it's just one of those days you know? Maybe I've should take some PCP and listen to "Dropping Names" by the Beastie Boys from Paul's Boutique (which song samples "Hey A-Pocky Way" by The Meters.)

Are we? Excellent, here's another then!

Hehe ok, so sometimes you dont want to block ads but slashdot was an easy example to pick.

Its odd how different sites looks without ads though, no ads pushing the top of the page down, no ads between the article and the comments, etc. For some sites such as the onion its nice to be rid of them.

I know that I will sleep much more soundly the day that Ashcroft is forced to clean out his desk.

Well I for one is sick of everyone ganging up on Ashcroft.

I'm sure that beneath the surface, well beneath, he means well. In a parallell universe, that is.

Yours,
Anonymous "Go to sleep, kid, or Ashcroft is coming for ya!" Coward.

THIS

Dino DeLaurentis is who Ed Wood would have been with a million dollar budget.

Somebody should tell MS marketing department that The Onion, that published the following eToilet article, is a satirical (as in "do not take this stuff seriously") magazine.

North Dakota has WMDs.

In other news, Microsoft patents the numbers 0 & 1, rendering all computer code their sole property..

Yep! They alread did patent ones and zeros

Give credit where it is due. Microsoft patents 1's and 0's

Dude,

At least quote the source for your stolen joke.

Your post reminded me of this onion article.

....I am not sure on what grounds are u basing ur arguements upon,but it is certainly shaky!
Detachment,my foot!Look at the coverage of the war in US media. If you really want detatched,objective journalism,take a look at Bremner,Bird,Fortune or America's finest news source

... it can hurt your sex life !!!

This probably isn't the answer you're looking for, but it passed unanimously in both the house and senate. Special interests bought both sides; no one party has a lock on serving the people.

Ah, I'll just have to wait for my legislators to be replaced.

I have a friend who is an Mechanical Engineering major. One complaint she has about her local SWE chapter is that it seems to be a 'Gyne-Power' type organization. e.g. "We have to stick together because we're women, and we need to show we're empowered." Ugh.

The point is that it's less about the "E" in SWE and more about the "W", and that's what bothers her. They don't do much engineering related -- no projects, no neat trips, no neat speakers on engineering topics -- rather they just get together and talk about "women's issues" in a manner that's largely orthogonal to engineering. Bleh.

She wants friends to hang out with to do engineering projects, other girls even! But where's the "E" in SWE?

To stave off all the wankers sure to fire up with their superior "I don't watch TV!" pablum, here's the obligatory theonion.com article. Grow up, folks. There's plenty of quality programming out there and PVR's (TiVo included) are a great tool to filter the good stuff out from the worthless programming. Avoiding television because you don't like Survivor is like staying off the Internet because AOL is here. It just means you're incapable of scrutiny.

I am against television to, but for some reason you remind me a lot of this guy.

The reasons for rejecting electronic voting systems are obvious: 45 More Legislators Lose Jobs To Increased Congressional Automation

Whoa, whoa whoa, there, Jim Anchower, a hard-rockin oldies fan like you isn't supposed to like The Hip! (Oops, did I say oldies? I meant, of course, erm "classic rock"... by which of course I mean the slightly-less-old-oldies type of music...)

Anyways, I'm getting off topic here. In addition to Led Zep and Hendrix you're also supposed to like Jethro Tull, Lynyrd Skynyrd, Blue Öyster Cult, REO Speedwagon and Bachman-Turner Overdrive.

PS: You're also not supposed to mind smoking joints that smell like sea-otter piss.

[Sorry, right-wing classic rock fans with names like "BigBlockMopar" are just too damn easy...]

Whoa, whoa whoa, there, Jim Anchower, a hard-rockin oldies fan like you isn't supposed to like The Hip! (Oops, did I say oldies? I meant, of course, erm "classic rock"... by which of course I mean the slightly-less-old-oldies type of music...)

Anyways, I'm getting off topic here. In addition to Led Zep and Hendrix you're also supposed to like Jethro Tull, Lynyrd Skynyrd, Blue Öyster Cult, REO Speedwagon and Bachman-Turner Overdrive.

PS: You're also not supposed to mind smoking joints that smell like sea-otter piss.

[Sorry, right-wing classic rock fans with names like "BigBlockMopar" are just too damn easy...]

Whoa, whoa whoa, there, Jim Anchower, a hard-rockin oldies fan like you isn't supposed to like The Hip! (Oops, did I say oldies? I meant, of course, erm "classic rock"... by which of course I mean the slightly-less-old-oldies type of music...)

Anyways, I'm getting off topic here. In addition to Led Zep and Hendrix you're also supposed to like Jethro Tull, Lynyrd Skynyrd, Blue Öyster Cult, REO Speedwagon and Bachman-Turner Overdrive.

PS: You're also not supposed to mind smoking joints that smell like sea-otter piss.

[Sorry, right-wing classic rock fans with names like "BigBlockMopar" are just too damn easy...]

I'm surprised you haven't featured this story on how Congressmen are losing their jobs to technical inovation.

The super lame thing is that I had been sent this article over a week ago.

(Mandatory mention for every article about remote control)

The world's greatest remote.

It's people like these who are doing the important work in making Klingon into such a successful modern language! Of course, they should also learn other, equally important languages.