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The Search Engine Belt Buckle
ptorrone writes "Engadget shows how they made "The Search Engine Belt Buckle" a PDA-based device which shows 24 hours of all the bizarre and banal things people are looking for on the web. Art project or pointless hack? That's for you to decide, people are searching for some pretty freaky stuff out there, so why not put in a belt buckle and get on the scene like a sex machine?"
Oh, it looks cool all right. I want people to stop me on the street and ask about it.
"Excuse me, sir, but why does your belt say 'night diaper bondage'?"
Sigs cause cancer.
Art project or pointless hack? Why can't it be both?
Love the Third Amendment?
boy, this must work well with the girls!
"hey baby, check out my new search engine belt buckle"
I had to GIS it. You'll be happy there are no results. However I do have a sudden desire to start a website called "diaperse".
I remember hearing that there is a monitor at google headquaters(i think it was in wired magazine) that scrolls random searches that are currently being done, cool idea.... but not new
Comment removed based on user account deletion
So how many of us geeks were twisted enough to find out what came up when you searched for "Vampire shemale beastiality bondage"?
I for one will probably be having nightmares tonight...
Speckpot?
WTF! There are 38,600 matches for "night diaper bondage"
Okay that's it, we're all going straight to hell.
Sig (appended to the end of comments you post, 120 chars)
Is that a Google search on your belt or are you just happy to see me?
So how many of us geeks were twisted enough to find out what came up when you searched for "Vampire shemale beastiality bondage"?
Enough to ensure it'll make the list.
this is my sig
A belt buckle is a tombstone for a dead dick.
Choosing the lesser of two evils is a choice for evil.
If anybody actually wants to do something like this, it would probably make more sense to get a cheap LCD and a microcontroller. You could put together something that works similarly for maybe $20.
A great many people use search engines as modern-day confessional booths - supposedly confidential ways to bear their most personal and private thoughts (well, search engines are more useful, but suck at spiritual advice).
And who wouldn't want to listen in on a confessional booth every now and then? Sure you'll never know who made what search, but it's a peek inside someone's psyche that you would never get the chance to see otherwise. Mental voyeurism.
Plus you may (~may~) find out that everyone else really is as weird as you in private. But why you'd need this on a belt buckle is anyone's guess.
- HOORAY!
I guess if you have no other reason to get women to stare at you crotch, this will work.
It's almost as cool as The Legendary Nintendo NES Controller Belt Buckle.
The long rumored, much talked about, infamous Nintendo NES Controller Belt Buckle. This belt buckle, once brushed off as merely a myth in the gaming world, is now available to grace your pants.
I've had hours (okay, minutes) of amusement by doing something similar; using the passive search feature of gtk-gnutella to see what others were looking for. People do indeed look for weird shit.
You can always tell how many are using the system for the first time by the number of times there's a search for the word 'porn' by itself. I'm tempted to try it out myself, but I'm afraid that with only 256Mb of ram, my computer will blow up.
Why the hell are they using video clips to display this information? Why not, you know, a text file of the search terms? This seemed cool and all, but when I saw that they were using Windows Media Player to do screen capture on a website, they instantly lost 50 square geek points. Square points!
*I* say that the next person who submits a story with any sort of intentional rhyming should be drawn, quartered, and then slashdotted. And yes, I know what all of those things are.
.. at just how pointless this is.
Fine, they're thinking "outside the box" but all they've done is duct tape a pda to a belt. Scroll some video across it and all of a sudden it's a "hack"?
I should submit a story about the day I broke the power button on my PC and replaced it, that was a hella wicked hack!
Art project or pointless hack?
There's a difference?
I think I can beat that, at least for persons of approximately my generation: Courtesy memepool, transformer porn.
"You're right," Fisheye says. "I should have set it on 'whip' or 'chop.'"
I was trying to find the site of a product called the "Stadium Buddy", but couldn't remember specific enough search terms. I confidently told my friends "oh, of course it's real. just google for recreational catheter". You know, because it's an external bladder you can wear to sporting events.
Whooooooa buddy were those the wrong search terms. I consider myself pretty jaded to the internet, but even I was shocked at the stuff that turns up. Erotic fiction about catheters? Even a quite illegal gay kiddie porn site from a guy who enjoys catheterizing and diapering preteens who are handcuffed in his basement.
I think your contest should be for "most screwed up query with innocent intentions". And must contain only true stories. Should be interesting...
Austin is more fun than Dallas.
Besides displaying search engine queries, this belt buckle also emits powerful female repellent rays. I doubt a girl would even get close enough to say "jesus christ that's the ugliest, geekiest thing I've ever seen."
-B
A much more entertaining game to play is, which product(s) is Engadget actually shilling in its latest article?
We all know that this is a commercial blog, so for this last article, was it Windows Media 9, Dogpile's SearchSpy, the PocketPC division of Microsoft, or some combination of them all?
Get off my launchpad!
Batman: Quick! Robin! The...batoogle...search..belt....
Robin: Wha?
Batman: Never mind.
There are a few places where you can check on live searches, and there are a lot of advertisers who are very interested in the results.
5 6041
http://searchenginewatch.com/facts/article.php/21
is a site which aggregates a lot of the searches.
On occasion, I find it quite relaxing watching the queries scroll up the screen like some wierdly twisted ascii lava lamp, and the content of some of those queries makes me feel reasuringly normal by comparison.
"I've got more toys than Teruhisa Kitahara."
Ooh lemme try:
"furry androgyne ferret bestiality pyromaniac necrophilia kiddie elephantitis nasal sex pics"
Now THAT's deviant. DO I WIN!? (and if so) WHAT DO I WIN!?
A restraining order? Wow, thanks...
pi = 3.141592653589793helpimtrappedinauniversefactory7
if it had wifi....Could update it 24/7
FTA...It does have WiFi.
I like that once in a while the phrase ;)
"Why are you watching?"
scrolls past. A new symptom of the slashdot effect I guess
sexy salesperson girl gallery
possum probe
Try it! What sort of sickos are surfing your website? Post em here!
Quid festinatio swallonis est aetherfuga inonusti?
Africus aut Europaeus?
"olympic nude athletes"
"leaving the scene of an accident"
"night diaper bondage"
"food"
"used juicer"
"catfighting lesbians"
"disorder cutting self injury"
It may only be a coincidence but I think someone's been watching what I google. Oh wait, they have "food" listed. Phew I was scared for a minute there.
While scanning over the stats for my website last month, I came across the absolute funniest search query I've ever seen:
"i want a free and easy fucking simple image viewing program god"
How could I say to men: "Speak louder, shout! For I am deaf!"? -Ludwig van Beethoven
I've seen at least ten searches entitled "die slashdotters"
In soviet russia, You ask not what country do for you, but what you do for country!
Oh wait...
Great, now I feel compelled to visit google every few minutes and search for "The person wearing this belt is a sexual pervert".
When the results start showing trolls such as "die slashdotters"
That when you look at the Searchspy list, someone has recently searched for "die slashdotters" :p
Slightly pointless all in all, there's no real skill involved in using WMP on a PDA which you've essentially duct taped to yourself. Since most people won't actually see what it says (unless you're comfortable with the idea of a large group of men and women squatting in a nightclub, huddled around your crotch... but maybe that's your thing) it would be more fun to actually play a proper movie, like a disco scene or some psychadelic winamp-style visualisation, so you could actually appreciate the belt beyond about 6 inches away...
Male virgin geeks like, um, a friend of mine.
I don't need a signature.
Ok, I am a software engineer, and thusly a pedantic fuck, so I have to posit: When I see chic I think its pronounced "sheek" and means trendy or popular. When I talk about an attractive young adult female human, I think chick, like a baby chicken. Am I wrong? Dictionaries seem to support me.
Though, I have to admit that chicks are often chic.
-If
Run a pencil-and-paper RPG campaign with your far-off friends: Gametable!
As an added bonus you can sing it to the tune of Supercalifragilistic etc.
Not that I'd go so far as to recommend doing so. (or imagining Julie Andrews doing so)
(from someone who still shudders at the memory)
I find it disturbing that there are people who willingly piss themselves because they gorge themselves on soft drinks (or beer) and absolutely cannot miss a couple of seconds of the game. Can't you hold it in until the break?
I thought I was pretty jaded...
"Google Enterprise Sales, how can we help you?" ..."
"Hi I'd like to have a subscription on the search queries made by Bill Gates on google.."
"Ohh good choice Sir, this one is most popular, please hold