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Superman 'Too Big' for the Big Screen
Evilelf writes "The new Superman is giving movie bosses a headache - because of the size of
his bulge. They fear Brandon Routh's profile in the superhero's skintight costume
could be distracting, reports the Sun. Hollywood executives have ordered the
makers of Superman Returns to cover it up with digital effects."
This is totally untrue. The actually designed the suit with that in mind, and added padding to deal with it.
activestudios web design
I for one, welcome our well endowed, super hero overlord
First, who really cares?
Second, this is old news. I heard this on the radio a week or two ago.
Third, as someone else said, you wanna bet tons of chicks are going to see the movie just to get a look at this guy's wang?
They could have just got him to lose a bit of weight before they did the filming...
Oh, wait, that bulge.
They don't call him Superman for nothing...
Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government.
link
...he's faster than a speeding bullet. Everybody has issues. :-)
I'd just write it into the story line. The bulge is a effect of pink kryptonite.
Funny How a rumor becomes fact just through repeating it everywhere...
Falling for viral marketting.
The cake is a pie
Even if the movie tanks, he will be remembered as the man that was so well endowed that they had to shink him digitally.
It was an MPIAA request, cuz they didn't want any competition in the "being a big dick" department.
I know his pain -- I also suffer from this disorder.
(Can't parents just explain it away by saying that Superman is All Kinds of Super?)
I have the same problem.
Maybe they shouldn't have hired Ron Jeremy to cast Superman
I, for one, will be waiting for the bulging uncensored version!
Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex
Here is a link to a pic.
For the entire movie they should cover his crotch with pixellation effects as used in "the Sims" game when the CG characters take a shower or use the toilet.
It would serve to please the radically prudish, entertain anyone otherwise bored with the movie, and also demonstrate how blatantly ridiculous the US sense of morality has become.
For Spiderman they had to edit out two towers.
One line blog. I hear that they're called Twitters now.
Actually, snigger is a real word, and used correctly.
Am I the only one who feels really sorry for the guy spending the whole editing process digitally reducing supermans bulge? Not something I'd want on my resume... Ncin
Apparently, the whiners are feeling more inadequate than usual...
People say I'm crazy, I got diamonds on the soles of my shoes...
This article reminded me of an old joke I once heard:
Superman was flying around the city and saw Wonder-Woman laying naked and spread-eagle on a rooftop. Superman thought that he would be able to fly down, screw her, and leave without her even knowing what happened. Sure enough, he did just that. Afterwards, Wonder Woman said, "What the hell just happened?" The invisible man, laying on top of Wonder-Woman replied, "I don't know, but my ass hurts like hell!"
If it would be surgical that would be a real news.
It is sad. I seem to recall Batman and Robin having nipples. Now that was distracting.
Havoc Video
It's a Blimp! It's an armadillo! It's Superman!!!!
FTFA:
The Sun's source said: "It's a major issue for the studio. Brandon is extremely well-endowed and they don't want it up on the big screen.
I would KILL for advertising like that!
Headline from next week's people: "Jennifer Aniston, Jessica Simpson, and J-Lo break up with boyfriends and husbands to view for the love of the new Superman"
...that's not what pink kryptonite does...
Yah we're not supposed to grouse over rejected submissions but,
/. editors, i've submitted at least a 1/2 a dozen stories more on topic with being "news for nerds" than this one.
/. editors want to comment? Is this a turn on or penis envy? WTF!
HOLY FUCKING HELL THIS IS A STORY ABOUT A BULGE IN A GUYS COSTUME!!! What the hell
Taco, do male bulges turn you on? Michael? Any other
I mean sure, superman IS nerdy to a point. It's science fiction, it was a comic book, maybe we can stretch it out to include Christopher Reeds fetus brain sucking stem cell cheerleading, but "OMFG SUPERMAN HAS A PENIS BULGE!! ROTF LOL!!" is about as nerdy and mature as the turd reports discussion on what he left in the toilet bowl. I'm sorry, it has no place here.
And before you decide to downmod me, seriously ask yourself, are you happy with this story being posted? Have you, yourself, the moderator had stories rejected in the last few months only to see this stupid childish drivel posted on the slashdots front page? Seriously, this story is about as mature as reading at -1 and GNFOS posts. I'm really disheartened to see a site that started off with such a great concept fall completely into trash journalism.
Before anyone says "Chill toq, it's parody" Duh!, yes I know it's a parody, but ask yourself, does even a parody about the new superman actor having a super dick even qualify as news for nerds? Didn't think so.
--toq
costume department went to great lengths
Ba dum bum!
Am I the only one slightly pissed off by this?
Women prance around almost naked in both TV and movies all the time. Nipples and boobs stand out way more than any guy's package.
But we can't see even an indirect indication of male genitals? What's the problem? Afraid it's going to come get you? Afraid of the revelation that men actually have penises?
I am not a big supporter of the sexualization of our media - I think it's a race to the bottom, in terms of the quality of content. But neither am I a supporter of some kind of willful blindness or disgust at the natural figure of men.
Here's the fundamental problem: Why is the male figure labeled as obscene, while the female figure is exalted?
Maybe it's all just because men always want to see female sexuality, but women are squeamish about seeing male sexuality.
But when it comes to art, or even a simple bulge, do we really have to pretend that penises don't exist just to make the public 'feel ok'? What is this thing between my legs then, which must be perpetually denied and hidden from view? Some kind of leprous growth?
Do we really want our sons to think their natural bulge is something to be ashamed of???
I say that it's demeaning and insulting to men to censor a natural bulge covered by clothing (even moderately tight clothing).
This is the lowest low for Slashdot. Treating a piece of nonsense that was proved as un-true five days ago and the source is arguably the worst of the British tabloids, The Sun. Does the Slashdot name and tagline mean anything anymore?
Mr. Smoove
From: "Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex", by Larry Niven:
"Is life so dear, or peace so sweet, as to be purchased at the price of chains and slavery?" - Patrick Henry
I think the news for nerds appeal is more this: look at this ridiculous use of technology. Look how far digital effects have come that the possibility of subtly manipulating every frame in which the lead actor appears (for a trivial reason) is accepted.
/. in a timely fashion.
Granted I read both this story and the debunking of the story ages ago, so it certainly didn't appear on
I understand that you have a strong opinion about this, but there are certainly far better ways to make your point. The instant you used the phrase, "Christopher Reeds fetus brain sucking stem cell cheerleading" I lost any respect for you I might have ever had.
Even if you're going to be insulting and ridiculous, at least get the late actor's name right.
Awfergodsake... Batman can have nipples that could cut glass on his costume (not to mention the whole matching Robin homoerotic costumerie), the Mystique character from x-men can crawl across the screen buck-ass nekkid but for a few well-placed scaly-things, and even the Spy Kids characters have proto-breasts and pouches to stimulate the (hopefully) 12-year old pervs in the audience. And I'm still scrubbing my brain from watching the characters in Lost in Space.
And Superman can't appear too male. Jebus. I'm not in favor of having a super-dong waved in my kid's face on the big screen, but come on, the bar is pretty low these days. This is the least of my worries.
I think not...(*poof*)
I love superman and I really want to see this movie but I'm afraid it might make me gay.
If you mod me down the terrorists will have won
My kids preschool works hard to encourage kids to use proper names for their body parts - surely us grownups can handle the word penis.
It's not wasting time, I'm educating myself.
Women on the other hand do look down there. Even if they deny it, it has been shown to be true during research where the movement of the eye was followed and they definitly do a quick check down there when they meet a man.
Oh and as for the whole size matters. This is what one woman told me. When she masturbates she frequently doesn't even penetrate and when she does she uses at most 2 fingers.
Now if your penis is no bigger then a woman's finger THEN you got a problem. For the rest, it is skill and the most important piece of knowledge? If you penis might be a bit small, you still got 10 fingers and a tongue. Some women even seem to like this whole foreplay thing.
Check if you can the most popular masturbation aids for women. A very good seller is always the egg/butterfly devices wich do not even do penetration. They just are smooth rounded objects that vibrate and are used on the outside. The huge 15inch black rubber slongs? Not for solo use. Women on their own seem to prefer simple small designs, the outlandish stuff is usually bought by males (possibly for their girls).
Think of it like this, if women enjoyed being stretched to the max they would look forward to their pap smear exam.
How do I know this? Well I worked in a side branch of the porn industry, maintaining those pay porn sites you all know and love. I also dealt with a local guy who owns several establishements in the amsterdam red light district. He makes a lot of money NOT from grubby old men but from females (often tourists) who come to buy a little helper.
MMO Quests are like orgasms:
You may solo them, I prefer them in a group.
Oh, it will, little Timmy. It will. You'll start out harmlessly craving men with tremendous bulges, but over time, it'll all turn into communism. Run, little Timmy, run!
Slashdot - where whining about luck is the new way to make the world you want.
In the first episode of Lois and Clark , Clark was trying on his Superman costume for the first time. His mom (who had designed and sewed it in this version) walked in to see how he looked in the costume:
Martha: Well, one thing's for sure. Nobody's going to be looking at your face.
Clark: Mom!
Martha: [laughing] Well they don't call them tights for nothing!
Did you hear about Lois Lane's death?
It was ruled a suicide, because she blew her brains out.
ba-dum-ching!
If you can read this, I forgot to post anonymously.
Mods I know this is of topic so mod away, just wanted to answer this guy Porn sites advertise there. Now there is a nasty bit about the world of economics that works like this. Banks are perfectly happy to TAKE money from the porn industry but will never ever lend it. You must be very discreet about even being a porn company to be allowed to open an account and them to hold your money.
Porn does not have huge stock market launches. The money invested is either your own savings or belongs to the kind of people who do not believe in loss leaders. No I am not going to say mafia but lets just say that you could at times be fooled.
So the porn industry is about making money and it is about making money now. A tactic like MS launch of the x-box with subsidie and making a loss on it simply CANNOT be done. So if porn companies pay to advertise on a site dedicated to free content you can bet they are certain to still somehow make a profit even from piracy.
Piracy has however three sorts. The commercial piracy were content is stolen and resold as if it was their own (very big problem) and "free" piracy were someone shares the content they BOUGHT (very important) for free. There is also a mix (like "free" sites like empornium wich make money from ads they can only sell because they are giving away others peoples content for free). So 3 types of piracy not looking good so far eh?
Luckily we have a couple of factors in our advantage compared to other industries having to deal with (non-commerical) piracy. Our production costs are a tiny fraction of the costs of producing even the lowest forms of "normal" entertainment. In hollywood $20 million is apparently considered a low budget. You could make the porn movie of all porn movies with that kind of money.
There is also an insatiable demand for "new" content. I say new in quotes because it doesn't have to be new as in hollywood new. You can have the exact same scene and just film it with different actors/actrices and make a line of sequels that make Rocky look fresh and exciting. And the customers will lap them up and demand MORE. No need for trilling plotlines or brilliant special effects. Doggy style NEVER gets old. Just look at how many porn titles have something like vol 24 behind them.
While there are some star with staying power who can be in the industry for years a very large segment is dependant on customers always wanting something new. The girls who are not clearly suckered into it in general go from being models to nude models to girl-girl to boy-girl and usually from photos to video. And then they disappear. "Fans" will eagerly demand their favorite does X next and then when she has done it all she will be quickly forgotten for the next fresh thing. Some erotic stars of old new this very well and NEVER went beyond a certain level ALWAYS leaving their fans wanting more and being able to last years were some last barely a few movies.
The low production cost and constant demand for more is important because there is a huge supply and products just don't last long. While there is a market for classics it is but a tiny portion.
So how can you still make money when everything you produce is also available for free? Well first reason is simple, the majority of customer do not realize it is free or have used kazaa. Now searching for porn on kazaa delivers you A virusses B worms C sickening stuff D not what you want. So a large group just doesn't think porn can be gotten free (just google for free porn to see what I mean). Even that group that does know (the visitors of the sites you mention) sometimes just want their fix NOW. Not when someone else has posted it. Rememeber ALL the content hosted has been bought by someone. Remember also that production costs are low? We do not need 100 million people to pay for our content like hollywood does to make a profit. Also remember that most paid content is insanely expensive. Most video stores sell porn dvd's for a far higher price then blockbuster hollywood releases. Pay
MMO Quests are like orgasms:
You may solo them, I prefer them in a group.
Why not just lower the temperature on the sets by 10-20 degrees?
Burn the land and boil the sea, you can't take the sky from me