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Cell Phone Use May Be Bad For Your Sperm
imaginaryelf writes, "WebMD reports that researchers have found a link between hours of cell phone use and sperm quality. 'In a study led by researchers from The Cleveland Clinic, men who used their cell phones the most had poorer sperm quality than those who used them the least.' We Slashdotters know that correlation does not equal causation, so further research is needed to understand the link, but just in case, maybe men should cut back on the hours of cell phone use?"
Hey, what I lack in quality, I make up for in quantity.
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My wife and I don't want any more children, so anything that makes that less likely sounds good to me.
I'll just not let my sperm use the phone.
Editor Emeritus and Senior Writer, TeleRead.org
We'd need girlfriends/wives before it really mattered!
"Don't meddle in the affairs of a patent dragon, for thou art tasty and good with ketchup." ~ohcrapitssteve
Do you suppose it could have something to do with keeping your arm elevated for four hours per day holding up the phone? That's hardly healthy, and would certainly have circulatory impact.
John
maybe men should cut back
Does that make anyone else wince, even slightly?
I think the kind of jerk who is always on a cell phone is the kind of jerk with low quality sperm to begin with.
My sperm are the size of M&M's and they have teeth and can't be killed by conventional weapons. Do I use a cell phone all day?
Hell no. If I want someone to know something, I punch it in Morse code right on their forehead.
A lack of quality sperm causes high cell phone usage!
XML is like violence. If it doesn't solve the problem, use more.
Who needs a condom, I've always got my T610 in my jeans' pocket.
Anonymous Luddite: "What do you think of the dehumanizing effects of the Internet?"
Andy Grove: "Not Much."
I'm just afraid that teenage boys will read this and try using their cell phone as a contraceptive device. "Come on, babe, it's safe... you know I'm on the cell at least an hour a day..."
http://alternatives.rzero.com/
Therefore, you call one of those places that you can talk with chicks for 1 minute, and you do no get the chick and you hurt yourself doing so. Bummer
*spits out white russian* Increases! Let me tell you a little something about The Dude. ++ for the movie reference above. I have a conflict of interest you see, as I'm not a phone person.
"It'll destroy you if you try to make it mean anything to anyone but yourself." - Henry Rollins
considering I keep my cellphone in my pants pocket most of the time.
oh well
The phrase "more better" is acceptable English. suck it grammar Nazis
it still tastes the same
I'd prefer not to have some snot-nosed crying kid taking away form my /. time... ;)
That's great. I'm going to have to purchase more minutes. I might even try to find a pair of pants with a cellphone pocket in the front.
I've really got to get a hottub soon, too. I've wanted one of my own ever since the first time I got in one, but what REALLY sealed the deal for me was the fact that prolonged exposure to heat kills sperm. No wonder hottubs are an indispensable portion of the Californian lifestyle; if you're going to have a ton of hot sex, it's a good idea to be infertile.
"You're right," Fisheye says. "I should have set it on 'whip' or 'chop.'"
Perhaps some of those people who are on their cellphone 8 hours a day should not be reproducing anyway
If your use of the cell phone is affecting your sperm count, perhaps you're using it wrong.
Hmm, I wonder if it's actually using the cell phone that's the problem, or the fact that I carry the phone around in my pants pocket. I suppose I'm sending my little swimmers micro-doses of microwave radiation. Or perhaps it's that more use means more ringing, which causes more radiation while still in the pocket. Personally, I suspect that those heavy cell phone users already had low sperm counts.
I wonder if in addition to sperm count/"quality", if it increases genertic mutations within the sperm cells. That would seem to be a much bigger societal health concern.
Software sucks. Open Source sucks less.
Not to mention that "low quality" could very well mean sperm with damaged DNA, but still alive and mobile. That's worse than having no sperm at all, IMO.
"[Regarding the 'cloud,'] ownership was what made America different than Russia." -- Woz
Bender: "What should we point it at first?"
Fry: "I dunno. Try it on me!" *zap* "Ow! My sperm!"
Bender: "Wow! Neat! Mind if I try that again?" *zap*
Fry: "Huh, didn't hurt that time."
I know it'll be bad for the one obnoxious cellphone dude who takes the same bus as me, since I'm just three more 50 Cent ringtones away from kicking him sqare in the junk.
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Due to intense lobbying by the Coca-Cola corporation, I believe it counts as your choice of either a serving of vegetables, or 20 minutes of cardiovascular exercise.
"Ladies and gentlemen, my killbot features Lotus Notes and a machine gun. It is the finest available."
I knew I shouldn't have let my sperm use cellphones... :(
If you use your cellphone a lot, that would probably mean it's more often next to your ear than in your pocket. Yet if you don't use your cellphone a lot, it would just be in your pocket all day.
But by that analogy it would mean that *using* your cellphone actually saves your balls! So how come the article states the exact opposite?
That explains so much! And here I thought it was a fundamental problem with their personality!
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Let's think about this for a minute. If a man is on his cell phone for hours per day, who exactly is he talking to? It's probably, uh, his girlfriend/wife.
Most of the people I've seen who are constantly on the phone are dicks anyway, so this study goes without saying...
Wait.. what?
And I just got my vasectomy. *Now* I learn the cheaper/less painful way.
52 Weeks, 52 Religions with John Hummel
It really doesn't mean much, since most of us slashdotters will never make use of it anyways.
When I first got my cell phone, I would notice periodically that monitors would flicker, radios shout static, and lights would sometimes dim. I soon tracked this behavior to whenever my phone would check for new emails, update its clock, or right before an incoming call. Thinking of this electronic phenomenon and the fact the phone was cozily hugging my nuts in my front jeans pocket, I bought a little phone holster and set it on my hip. Do you think I'm being paranoid?
--Rob
Towards the Singularity.
So, there might be a connection? A suspected decline? They don't even know if the decline is real? This is an article about nothing.
Love sees no species.
I'm pretty sure the thousands of hours I have in the data center and at the radio station inside their respective effective faraday cages have had much, much more effect on my little guys' triathalon abilities than using my cell phone has.
Nothing will fry your junk better than having huge EMF-emitting devices surrounding your crotchal region for eight hours a day, six days a week.
If all my base are belong to you and I attempt to retrieve my base, does that mean I'm freebasing?
"Do I look all rancid and clotted? You look at me, Jack. Eh? Look, eh? And I talk a lot on the cell phone. I'm what you might call a cell phone man, Jack - that's what I am. And I can swear to you, my boy, swear to you, that there's nothing wrong with my bodily fluids. Not a thing, Jackie."
-- With apologies to Lionel Mandrake
- None can love freedom heartily, but good men; the rest love not freedom, but license. -- John Milton
Depending on the type of vasectomy, you might want to check up on whether it has worked as it ought. Some types are prone to failure.
Theres enough people walking about the place already - crank the power up and fry a few adults, never mind their sperm I say! Why is it that the human race is intent on messing the place up by over breeding and screwing up the planet with waste. Six billion ought to be enough of anything, even Natalie Portmans with hot grits, well maybe six billion of those would be ok. Its just not good enough blaming it on someone else, "God made me do it" is not an excuse and "I did it to get housing benefit" is just insane. And whats with the Eco freaks - their more likely than anybody to be chilling out with a large brood of bearded be-sandled offspring.
Mobil phones use verses sperm count is just so hugely ridiculously unbelievably trivial that I cant believe you haven't all gone and died of diminished brain function in the middle of last night. What is spectacularly obvious is that the odds of being killed in an automobile accident before you can fire off those sperm and add to the mountains of flesh tramping over the planet are magnitudes higher.
And whilst your at it take up smoking and help clear a bit more space for the coming generations.
Facts are history now plebs have politics for religion on social media.
Cliff Claven
K.E.G. Party Chairman
Founding Leader of: Koncerned for Egalitarin Governance
That's fine, I wasn't using it anyway.
Even people that believe in pre-destiny look both ways before crossing the street.
...how would that be a bad thing? My wife never needs to know I said that. ^_^ (and that was a rhetorical question)
Having a vasectomy may be bad for your sperm.
I don't know about Coke out, but a dose of coke in is about 50 mg.
Is that a treo in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?
Yeah, it's a treo. Condoms are expensive.
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Wish I had mod points. :)
We have always been at war with Eurasia!
Cell phones: the new birth control!
..would this make it a bad idea to dial the phone with your testicles?
I can no longer sit back and allow Cell Phone Company infiltration, Cell Phone Company indoctrination, Cell Phone Company subversion, and the international Cell Phone Company conspiracy to sap and impurify all of our precious bodily fluids.
If anyone needs me, I'll be in the Angry Dome.
The manual that accompanies a Cell Phone, usually not including that actual Service Contract, is required a clause or statement near the end or Directory Listing that default dis-claims with prejudice of the FCC that of all the possible harm that is self-same disclosed to whomever makes use of the Cell Phone will not hold liable medical costs or recompense to damage from the FCC or the Manufacturer or related owners of said patents and copyrights ensigned upon the property.
In other words, their rate of disclosure of all the ill-health nigh experimental communications errata cause, is met with "harmless" improper amendments to the verry contract limiting the sale of said property. It's as though they are psycopathic lawyers performing surgery on your ears, and expecting you to have hearing for matters of damage they had evidence and knowledge before disclosure but decided naught to disclose in fear of no Consideration and no Satisfaction to enter the same Cell Phone use and Service.
If there were a nuclear-powered Oven used to cook food, would they sell per contract to "cook food quicker" to the satisfaction of the owner and then modify their reservations in the contract to the incompetance of the owner to deflect or refuse said alleged "amendments" that do more to change the intent than to ammend (correct)?
A bullet isn't even advertised to kill, because it is the people that determine the intent of the bullet. Yet, a Cell Phone is poorly designed to communicate, while causing all kinds of collateral damage that are known but not disclosed in the original contract and note, and assumed to accept all alleged corrections (amendments). Entering a restaraunt is to be satisfied to eat food at a restaraunt, whereas this is no different than forced to accept and agree to a contract before leaving the restraunt with the assimilated food.
I hope the people return to extend the abilities of Citizens Band radio, for moderate-distance local chat procedures of a terminal, relay of communications in the form of free and independent postal stations, and other capabilities.
This is same as confusing the people to think that Fluoride in the water is healthy, when in fact Fluoride itself is poisonous while Calcium Fluoride is the original intent scrapped in order to secure the medical services to treat whomever is involed with the pains hidden by Fluoride itself.
without prejudice
Don't be so sure. The frequency of the photons matters a lot. That's why a bright day's sunlight turned into X or gamma rays will kill you dead.
It would be strange indeed if FM radio waves, which have a very low energy per photon, could do any serious harm to a body. Little in our body resembles an antenna big enough to download them. Cell phone waves are much higher frequency, of course, but exposure to them is still nothing like our daily exposure to visible, IR, UV, radio and every other photonimal in the electromagnetic zoo from old Sol overhead.
President and Founder, right here. Vasectomy - the gift that keeps on giving.
Poor means hoping the toothache goes away.
...I am willing to assume that correlation equals causation. It is now proven: Men with low sperm-quality talk more on the phone than men with good sperm-quality. Women (who doesn't even have sperm), talk even more!
Might wanna take a good hard look at them sometime :)
Given the number of people on this planet and the resource drain we cause, is this a bad thing?
*It's not what you can do for the Dark Side but what the Dark Side can do for you!*
This brings new meaning to the phrase "cum hoc ergo propter hoc."
How many old people do you see with cell phones?
Now you know why they call it generational warfare.
You've all fallen into our clever plan.
... after 4 kids :) 2 of which were conceived whilst on the waiting list for 'the snip'. There's no such thing as an emergency vasectomy apparently.
Still... you've got to wonder what kind of kinky phone sex would be involved to actually have radiation reach the testes in any quantity. "My penis would like a word with you... i'll put him on".
http://achewood.com/index.php?date=05192006
Don't miss the "vestigal dong" story this kicked off...
---GEC
I'm but the humble pupil, seeking to snatch the scratchbuilt pebble from the master's fully articulated hand
No, nothing will fry your junk better than falling into a campfire because you were too busy talking on that cell phone to watch where you were walking.
I didn't see anything about controlling for age. I would expect age to be correlated with wealth, and cellphone time, and fertility problems.
It seems like someone does a study that supports conclusion A, and then everyone says, "But we really need more studies to be sure." So then more studies come out, and now one supports B, but everyone follows it up with, "But we really need more studies to be sure."
Contrary to what people seem to think, we actually have an excellent understanding of electromagnetic radiation and its effects on biological tissue. This knowledge is the foundation of things such as the microwave oven and X-ray and MRI imaging. Now, I'm all for questioning what we think we know, in the name of science, but at some point you have to wonder if all of these studies are fueled by ignorant fear and not out of a desire for good science.
So the people who use their cellphones all the time will be unable, or at least less likely, to reproduce?
:)
Huzzah!
Natural selection is alive and well, it seems
I've got a RAZR in mine! Oh, wait...
What if the Hokey Pokey really is what it's all about?
What's the chance of having an unusually high percentage of males at a fertility clinic with poor sperm quality? Couldn't have seen that one coming. (Sorry, I didn't really mean it like that...)
Is it just my observation, or are there way too many stupid people in the world?
Nevermind I'll let you talk to him yourself....
Maybe it's not such a good idea after all.
May I take a message?
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