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Turkey Day Chemistry in the Kitchen

instupor writes "Just in time for the holiday, PopSci runs through the food science behind moist turkey, perfect potatoes and flaky pie crust. Besides the actual "why," the article explains how to apply the scientific principals in your own kitchen."

131 comments

  1. oh noes by telchine · · Score: 5, Funny

    My mother's banned me from doing science experiments ever since the last "incident". :(

    1. Re:oh noes by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Gordon Freeman, we meet at last.

  2. "apply principals"? by phaunt · · Score: 5, Funny

    Do the recipes actually include smearing headmasters over the turkey, or was 'principles' meant?

    1. Re:"apply principals"? by cheesebilly · · Score: 1

      i think headmasters adds the perfect touch

    2. Re:"apply principals"? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      No, no, no, he meant senior Andersen consultants...

  3. Why turkey? by Turn-X+Alphonse · · Score: 4, Interesting

    I have never understood why we have turkey at Christmas (I'm a UKian not an American so I don't do thanks giving but it applies), it's a very poor meat and far too large for the average family, so how come we do it?

    I'm also allergic to dairy productions you insensitive clod!

    --
    I like muppets.
    1. Re:Why turkey? by DrMindWarp · · Score: 1

      It's an American fad that spread to Europe because of the novelty factor. A nice juicy ham is the traditional Christmas dish for most of Nothern Europe.

    2. Re:Why turkey? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Informative

      Goose was the traditional food in the UK. It's made a small resurgence, but it's still pretty much turkey everywhere. Goose fat was in high demand in the UK last year too, as a food-fad when it was endorsed by a TV chef as making rather good roast potatoes. I don't know if that will continue...

    3. Re:Why turkey? by heinousjay · · Score: 1

      Turkey isn't exactly a fad in America.

      --
      Slashdot - where whining about luck is the new way to make the world you want.
    4. Re:Why turkey? by CmdrGravy · · Score: 4, Interesting

      I think it's basically because before frozen turkeys were widespread they were probably quite expensive and hard to come by. Before that I think we ate geese, swans, pheasants, ducks and things like that.

      I expect its probably because they were at one point expensive and available relatively exclusively to the rich that everyone switched over when they could get them more easily to enjoy a bit of 'class'.

    5. Re:Why turkey? by Yetihehe · · Score: 1

      GP meant turkey is a fad in Europe. In Amercia it's standard.

      --
      Extreme Programming - Redundant Array of Inexpensive Developers
    6. Re:Why turkey? by squizzar · · Score: 1

      Can't answer your question exactly, but I do remember an American neighbour explaining to me once that the reason they had their Turkey at thanksgiving was because they didn't have the patience to put up with the obnoxious birds until Christmas.

    7. Re:Why turkey? by Chirs · · Score: 1

      I suspect that Christmas gatherings are smaller than they used to be.

      My family still gets together with all the uncles and cousins for Chrismas dinner. Not unusual to have 30 or more people....one turkey just isn't enough.

      What do you mean by a "poor meat"? Done properly, turkey is very tasty.

    8. Re:Why turkey? by Emetophobe · · Score: 1

      it's a very poor meat and far too large for the average family, so how come we do it?

      You know they sell different sized turkeys?

    9. Re:Why turkey? by PhysicsPhil · · Score: 2, Interesting

      I have never understood why we have turkey at Christmas (I'm a UKian not an American so I don't do thanks giving but it applies), it's a very poor meat and far too large for the average family, so how come we do it?

      This very topic merited an article over at http://www.slate.com/id/2178388/nav/fix/. Poultry was popular in general because the cows had economic value (milk and labour) beyond that of birds. Pork or ham was common, but not considered fit for special events. Chicken hens were valuable for their eggs and rooster was too tough. Turkey had the advantage that birds that hatched in the spring would have grown to about 10 pounds by Thanksgiving, which was important because it was large enough to feed a big family.

    10. Re:Why turkey? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      It must be a Anglo-American thing.

      My family with German ancestry usually goes with Goose. At Christmas, we also eat Goose, sometimes Carp (the fish). I don't think we're unusual considering we get Goose at the supermarket and it's a good meat.

      Incidentally, a couple of days ago, I went to get a few lobsters for an unrelated (to the holidays) meal and the lady told me all of them were reserved for Thanksgiving. So I suppose there are people who eat much different meals than the envisioned Turkey.

    11. Re:Why turkey? by Balthisar · · Score: 1

      But we're talking Thanksgiving for turkeys, not Christmas. Here in the US, there are several different traditions for Christmas dinner, probably having to do with our respective nations of origin. There's turkey, ham, goose, and in my family, prime rib (standing rib roast). For really large gatherings, you'll often encounter more than one of these.

      --
      --Jim (me)
    12. Re:Why turkey? by yakumo.unr · · Score: 1

      A goose is just a lot more expensive than a turkey, and harder to fit in many peoples ovens too.

      fantastically good to eat though, and the other posters are right about goose fat based roast potatoes, even if you can feel your heart fall through your belly, still I'd love to try the duck fat roasted ones suggested too...

      mmmm, roast spud season is almost upon us. woohoo

    13. Re:Why turkey? by armb · · Score: 1

      Dickens' "A Christmas Carol" was published in 1843 and Scrooge buys a prize turkey for the Cratchit's Christmas. Over 150 years is quite a long "fad".

      --
      rant
    14. Re:Why turkey? by TheRaven64 · · Score: 1

      I have never understood why we have turkey at Christmas

      As another posters have pointed out, it's a fad, just like the Christmas tree. The Christmas tree in the UK came over from Germany with Prince Albert. He and Queen Victoria had one, and so all of the upper classes wanted one because it was the fashion. A bit later, they became a bit cheaper and the middle classes got them too, so they could pretend to be aristocrats for a bit. Later, they became cheap enough for everyone to afford one.

      This is also the reason we call sheep-meat mutton, instead of sheep. After the Norman invasion, the new upper classes (brought over from Normandy) would speak French and would talk about le mouton. Aristocrats would eat mouton and peasants would eat sheep (occasionally). The middle classes wanted to adopt the mores of the upper and distance themselves from the lower, so they also ate mouton, but mangled the pronunciation.

      Turkeys were very expensive on their introduction to the UK. Only a few were brought over from the USA and so only the very rich could afford them. Eating turkey at Christmas was a status symbol. Gradually, as more were bred natively, the price dropped and it filtered down. By the time the masses could afford them, they had been eaten by the upper and middle classes for so many years that they were a tradition.

      I'm a UKian not an American so I don't do thanks giving but it applies

      Yes we do, but we celebrate it on the fourth of July.

      --
      I am TheRaven on Soylent News
    15. Re:Why turkey? by drsquare · · Score: 1

      What do you mean by a "poor meat"? Done properly, turkey is very tasty.
      Turkey is just a big, bland, dry chicken.
    16. Re:Why turkey? by Disfnord · · Score: 1

      You know, I'm a vegetarian, but I still take offense at that.

    17. Re:Why turkey? by zippthorne · · Score: 1

      For Christmas, I think it may have something to do with Dickens. Everyone trying to have the storybook Victorian Christmas or something. If it's good enough for Tiny Tim, it's gotta be good? maybe?

      Of course, this is especially odd considering how depressing so much of Dickens' work is...

      --
      Can you be Even More Awesome?!
    18. Re:Why turkey? by amias · · Score: 0

      ITYM geese

      Turkeys are gentle silly creatures that can even get bullied
      by chickens that are less than half their size.

      Geese on the other hand are properly obnoxious and can
      be used as very effective burglar alarms / attack creatures.

      It amuses me , as a vegan , how little meat eaters know about
      the animals they actually eat .

      Toodle-pip
      Amias

      --
      [site]
    19. Re:Why turkey? by cens0r · · Score: 1

      How is a goose harder to fit in an oven? A goose is generally 10-13lbs. A turkey can easily top 20lbs.

      --
      Jack Valenti and Orrin Hatch will be first up against the wall when the revolution comes.
    20. Re:Why turkey? by johnlcallaway · · Score: 1

      Then no one that has cooked it for you knows how to do it right.

      --
      I rarely read replies, it's my opinion and if you thought about your opinion a little more, I'm OK with that.
    21. Re:Why turkey? by ColdWetDog · · Score: 1

      It amuses me , as a vegan , how little meat eaters know about the animals they actually eat.

      All you really need to know is 1) how to catch them and 2) how to cook them.

      Everything else is just gravy.

      --
      Faster! Faster! Faster would be better!
    22. Re:Why turkey? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      Wait: are you supposed to kill the goose before you put it in the oven?

    23. Re:Why turkey? by Torvaun · · Score: 1

      By average family, do you mean four people? If so, I completely agree that a turkey is too large. Of course, we're looking at 15 people for Thanksgiving in this house, and Christmas is going to be even more people. We also have a wide variety of turkey-based leftover recipes.

      As far as poor meat goes, I can only imagine that either turkeys over there are different from turkeys here, or that whoever prepares your turkey doesn't know what they're doing.

      --
      I see your informative link, and raise you a pithy comment.
    24. Re:Why turkey? by onkelonkel · · Score: 2, Interesting

      Good point. This applies to almost all our food animals. The animal has the old anglo-saxon name but the cooked meet has the norman french name. Cow / Beef (boeuf) , chicken / Poultry (poulet), sheep / mutton (mouton), pig / pork (porc).

      --
      None of them can see the clouds; The polished wings don't care.
    25. Re:Why turkey? by yakumo.unr · · Score: 1

      too used to seeing smallfry here in comparison

    26. Re:Why turkey? by bigstrat2003 · · Score: 1

      It saddens me, as a non-vegetarian, that you feel the need to act self-righteous about your choice. Seriously, while it's interesting that turkeys are not in fact obnoxious, shut the fuck up with the "I'm better than you cause I don't eat meat" overtones.

      --
      "16MB (fuck off, MiB fascists)" - The Mighty Buzzard
    27. Re:Why turkey? by raidfibre · · Score: 1

      Poor meat says you. You just have to know how to properly cook it

    28. Re:Why turkey? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      It amuses me , as an omnivore , how little vegans know about the basics of the English language. He said they ate turkey at Thanksgiving because they didn't want to put up with the obnoxious bird until Christmas. I.e., the turkey is not an obnoxious bird (correct), but the Christmas bird (goose) is (also correct). You fail. Oh, and you're a self-righteous prick, too. Happy Thursday.

    29. Re:Why turkey? by Frank+Battaglia · · Score: 1

      What do you mean by a "poor meat"? Done properly, turkey is very tasty.
      Turkey is just a big, bland, dry chicken. Then you're not doing it right. Turkey cooked properly is actually more flavorful than chicken.
    30. Re:Why turkey? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Informative

      Interestingly enough, I've heard just the opposite. Where I'm from (Minnesota) wild turkeys are actually rather plentiful, even today. The story I heard was that Lincoln had made Thanksgiving an official holiday, and people sent turkeys to the soldiers because they were cheaper than other fowl and being quite large, could feed more people. This is just a rumor I've heard though.

      Geese are pretty big too, but you'd need several pheasants or ducks to feed a large family (or a crowd of soldiers).

    31. Re:Why turkey? by Codifex+Maximus · · Score: 1

      Well, I figure it's about time to let this secret out.

      The best way to cook a turkey is breast side down. This keeps the breast from cooking too fast, lets the dark meat get done first and the bones in the bird exude juice which then runs down to the breast.

      About 30 min before it's done, you turn the turkey upright and finish the cooking by browning the breast. A fork inserted into the breast, in a non conspicuous place, should have only a partial resistance to removal. The meat should be just done - worst thing you can do to a turkey is overcook it. Makes it dry and unpalatable.

      Spice how you like it but this is the best way I've found to cook a turkey.

      Furthermore, any turkey that didn't get eaten on the first go you put in the icebox to chill. Makes great sandwiches with mayo later.

      --
      Codifex Maximus ~ In search of... a shorter sig.
    32. Re:Why turkey? by GWBasic · · Score: 1

      I have never understood why we have turkey at Christmas (I'm a UKian not an American so I don't do thanks giving but it applies), it's a very poor meat and far too large for the average family, so how come we do it?

      The turkey is native to the Northeastern United States, which were the first states to be settled. A few years ago, a family of turkeys spent an afternoon in my parents' back yard, eating worms!

      Turkeys tend to be good for feeding an extended family, as opposed to the nuclear family.

    33. Re:Why turkey? by dickens · · Score: 1

      With four people sitting down, we only ate one breast of our 15lb turkey (a freebee from my employer). But a half hour after eating when I found a little energy, five minutes of diligent work turned turned the remainder into three gallon-size zipper bags of white and dark meat and roasted bones. Took about five minutes, and now I have enough meat for another dozen servings of hot and cold turkey sandwiches, turkey salad and enough bones to make a gallon of good stock. So if you're handy with a knife and a little brute force to tear the carcass into pieces it can be a good buy.

      My bird came out great this year after 16 hours in a ginger & garlic brine.

    34. Re:Why turkey? by dickens · · Score: 1

      I brined my turkey 3 or 4 years ago and I'll never cook a turkey otherwise again. It makes a huge difference.

      Put enough salt in water to make an egg float, and add your favorite flavorings. Immerse bird for one hour per pound, approximately. Then roast as usual (un-stuffed, of course). Oddly the bird doesn't get salty, but the drippings are salty, so the gravy might be a little salty for your taste. You won't need to add any salt anyway.

    35. Re:Why turkey? by dickens · · Score: 1

      Different bird. The turkeys we buy to eat are of Mexican descent, I think, and are white-feathered. I know people who eat wild turkey other wild fowl of the northeast, and it's not the same experience at all, they say.

    36. Re:Why turkey? by GWBasic · · Score: 1

      Actually, domesticated turkeys come from North America. Take a look at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wild_Turkey and http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Domesticated_turkey. Domesticated turkey descends from Meleagris gallopavo, which is the North American breed.

      From what I hear, it is true that wild turkey tastes different then domesticated; this is to be expected because of selective breeding and a different lifestyle.

      Ever read Darwin's descriptions of the different varieties of pigeons? He found that when he cross-bred very different varieties of domesticated pigeons, they resembled wild pigeons. This lead him to conclude that all of the specific traits of domesticated pigeons were in wild pigeons, but only showed themselves when pigeons with the desired traits were mated together. The same could be said for domesticated turkeys; cross-breeding different domesticated turkeys will probably yield turkeys that are similar to wild turkeys from the Northeastern United States.

    37. Re:Why turkey? by mqduck · · Score: 1

      far too large for the average family Here, Thanksgiving is the number one holiday for family reunions, probably even more than Christmas. So that explains that.
      --
      Property is theft.
    38. Re:Why turkey? by CmdrGravy · · Score: 1

      Obviously in the US turkeys are plentiful since they are native to the US. The parent was talking about the UK where turkeys are not native animals and have to be imported or specially farmed, this is why they were at one point expensive and hard to come by over here.

    39. Re:Why turkey? by amias · · Score: 0

      whoa there meat boy , you seem a little paranoid , an unhealthy diet does that too you.

      --
      [site]
    40. Re:Why turkey? by Card+Zero · · Score: 1

      On the west coast of the United States, Dungeness crab season has usually opened by Thanksgiving. It's not unheard of for families to have fresh crab for Turkey Day. Although this year, a nasty oil spill has been causing a lot of problems in San Francisco Bay, so it's been much harder to come by.

    41. Re:Why turkey? by drsquare · · Score: 1

      If you can do that with a turkey, you may as well do it with a chicken. If turkey was that good, people would eat it more than once a year.

  4. What's the number? by FredDC · · Score: 5, Funny

    ... how to apply the scientific principals in your own kitchen ...


    What's the number of the poison control center again?
    --
    09 f9 11 02 9d 74 e3 5b d8 41 56 c5 63
    1. Re:What's the number? by MagicM · · Score: 3, Informative

      1-800-222-1222

      (I know you were being +2 Funny, but still...)

    2. Re:What's the number? by kavau · · Score: 1

      Ha! I am the scientific principal in my kitchen!

  5. Principals? by Sockatume · · Score: 0, Redundant

    I tried to get one of our scientific principals to apply himself in the kitchen. He told me to make a new pot of coffee and get back to the lab.

    --
    No kidding!!! What do you say at this point?
  6. News for nerds, by IBBoard · · Score: 0, Troll

    stuff that matters...if you have problems trying to cook a good turkey and you're willing to accept the "how to cook" as news.

    1. Re:News for nerds, by Lars+T. · · Score: 1

      stuff that matters...if you have problems trying to cook a good turkey and you're willing to accept the "how to cook" as news. Gee, I'm sure you cut off the ends of your roast.
      --

      Lars T.

      To the guy who modded me down from perfect to terrible Karma - Apple haters still suck

  7. Cooking is science by Slashidiot · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Doesn't matter if people want to call it art, it is applied chemistry and physics. The only thing is that there are many variables and humans have really good sensors to appraise the results. So that instead of calculating the Na+ ions, you can just taste it and get a better reading. Instead of using high precission lab instruments, we use the built in tools we have.

    In the end, art is just applied science, but with wildly varying parameters, so it takes a very complex measuring instrument to appreciate the results.

    --
    Tis women makes us love, Tis Love that makes us sad, Tis sadness makes us drink, And drinking makes us mad.
    1. Re:Cooking is science by should_be_linear · · Score: 2, Funny

      In the end, art is just applied science, but with wildly varying parameters, so it takes a very complex measuring instrument to appreciate the results.

      Is it another way of saying "Art is cool but I just don't have fucking idea why!".

      --
      839*929
    2. Re:Cooking is science by ozmanjusri · · Score: 1
      Doesn't matter if people want to call it art, it is applied chemistry and physics.

      So is all art.

      In fact what determines how artistic a work is is how well the artist can conceal the physics and chemistry.

      --
      "I've got more toys than Teruhisa Kitahara."
  8. Dunno about goose fat by Nursie · · Score: 2, Insightful

    But duck fat potatos are a thing of beauty. And probably heart attacks.

    Give it a try (duck or goose), your vegetable oil roast potatos will seem rather second rate afterwards.

    1. Re:Dunno about goose fat by aproposofwhat · · Score: 1
      A mix of 75% duck fat, 25% Welsh (salty - at least 2.5% salt) butter is my preference, and remember to beat up the potatoes before roasting to get that extra crunch.

      The butter helps to brown the potatoes, and soaks into the crunchy bits to make them extra tasty.

      --
      One swallow does not a fellatrix make
  9. It's thanksgiving by Nursie · · Score: 2, Informative

    You know, that time when Americans give thanks to the native american indians who helped them survive over winter when they were new immigrants to the continent.

    Generally very little mention is made of what happened next and how the new immigrants proceeded to usurp the native's land and make a good attempt at exterminating them. Perhaps we should have called them "naive american indians instead", for helping the white man survive and get a foothold.

    1. Re:It's thanksgiving by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      the only real diffrence between the white man / the indians... and saddam / kuwait is..

      we won.

      so that makes it all ok.

    2. Re:It's thanksgiving by Gigiya · · Score: 4, Insightful

      Generally very little mention is made of what happened next ...
      Except for every rebellious 15-year old that hates family gatherings, and self-righteous people on the internet. I acknowledge the fact that Native Americans were slaughtered, but I don't hesitate to enjoy time with my family and delicious turkey.
    3. Re:It's thanksgiving by Nursie · · Score: 0, Offtopic

      Why is it self-righteous to point out the hypocracy and idiocy inherent in the tradition?

      I'm not saying you shouldn't spend quality time with your family, just pointing out how ridiculous it is to someone who had no idea what the tradition was or how it started, on account of not being american (which I'm not either).

    4. Re:It's thanksgiving by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      very little mention my ass every year there are a lot of sniveling little whiners like you it's called THANKSGIVING because we're GIVING THANKS we're not members of a failed society yet

    5. Re:It's thanksgiving by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      The GP just pointed out that it's not "generally very little mentioned" and you reply by asking why it's self-righteous?

      Methinks you are changing the discussion.

    6. Re:It's thanksgiving by Foolicious · · Score: 4, Insightful

      I was waiting for this one.

      Darn white man. Source of all problems. First of all, kills off all the supremely peaceful and progressive Native Americans, on which the REAL future of things like science and medicine rested. THEN, picks a poor-tasting bird to celebrate with. Can't even choose a good tasting bird, for pete's sake. Finally, invents football, which isn't even really played primarily with the feet!

      I wish we could go back to those pre-usurping days in America (not even a good name! Amerigo Vespucci was an idiot), especially the parts where I could treat women as property and do as I pleased with them, where I could cower in fear of the Windigo and watch my children die of infections from simple cuts on their feet. But the stupid western europeans took that liberty away from me. Idiots.

      Now, scroll down a bit if necessary, choose Flamebait and have a Happy Thanksgiving! God bless!

      --
      Please don't use "umm" or "err" or "erm".
    7. Re:It's thanksgiving by cyberwench · · Score: 1

      Funny, I would have sworn it comes up every year.

      Besides, I don't think that the period of time in which the two groups of people actually working and living together is a bad thing to celebrate.

      --
      ~ Leilah
  10. Re:What the hell by CmdrGravy · · Score: 5, Funny

    It's some sort of festival they have in the US. I think the Turkey is the national bird over there and by eating it they hope to assume some of it's qualities. Backwards and primitive though it may seem to European eyes it does seem to work.

  11. No Turkey For Brits by ilovegeorgebush · · Score: 3, Interesting

    Won't be much Turkey consumption in Britain on Christmas day. The H2N1 Bird-flu virus has caused mass culling of many types of birds. See here for more info.

    I hate Turkey anyway, always too dry.

    1. Re:No Turkey For Brits by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Interesting
      Turkey too dry? Hmmm. Try it this way:

      Deep frying a turkey may sound like a strange concept, but trust me, it doesn't come out like you'd think. Deep fried turkey is moist and delicious and not at all greasy.

      Of course, an idea like fried turkey originated in the south, the frying capital of the United States, but it is gaining popularity nationwide. In fact, a recent block party I attended in South Central Los Angeles had three fried tukeys going . . . [continued]
    2. Re:No Turkey For Brits by barzok · · Score: 1

      Too dry? You're cooking it wrong. Then again, most people do.

      The bird we had tonight was soaked in a honey brine solution for 26 hours, then put on a grill w/ indirect heat and hardwood chips for smoke flavor.

      Hands-down the best, most flavorful, juiciest turkey I've ever had.

  12. Math by Thanshin · · Score: 2, Funny

    Let's assume T is a perfectly spherical turkey...

  13. Physics by rfreedman · · Score: 1

    Assume that turkey T is a frictionless turkey.........

    1. Re:Physics by Bazman · · Score: 3, Funny

      Ah, friction physics jokes:

      Q. Which is the slipperiest cat?

      A. The one with the lowest 'mew'.

  14. It's probably not "science"... by Fross · · Score: 5, Interesting

    but if you're after perfect potatoes, I've got a couple of hints that *always* work.

    Roast potatoes:
    Pre-heat the oven (200C?) and put oil in a big oven-proof pan in the oven to heat. Meat-based fat is better than vegetable, but a mixture is good too.
    Boil the potatoes until you can scrape them a bit with a fork (20-25 minutes). Drain the water (keep for gravy if you like), put a lid on the pan, and shake it *hard* several times. Some potatoes will disintegrate but mostly they will just get really rough surfaces - this makes them crunchy.
    Remove pan from oven, pour the fat into a receptacle, leaving a tiny bit behind. Put the potatoes into this pan. Pour a spoonful of the fat on top of each potato. Put back in the oven, cook for 45-50 minutes. They will be soft in the middle, crunchy on the outside.

    Mashed potatoes:
    Don't boil the potatoes, steam them. 20-25 minutes until cooked through.
    Remove water from steamer, put potatoes in (because it's warm). Add salt, creme fraiche (or butter if you have to), about 2 heaped heaspoons for 800g potatoes.
    Use an electric whisk, whisk the hell out of them. Keep speeding up as you go, and keep going for a minute after it looks fine.
    The steaming means they won't be watery, and the whisking means no lumpy bits. Fluffy, rich and smooth mashed potatoes!

    Happy thanksgiving to all our North American cousins :)

    1. Re:It's probably not "science"... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Insightful
      Happy thanksgiving to all our North American cousins :)


      Huh? Last time I checked, Canada was a pretty big part of North America and it is not thanksgiving in Canada... that was LAST month

    2. Re:It's probably not "science"... by value_added · · Score: 1

      Mashed pototoes: ... Use an electric whisk, whisk the hell out of them. Keep speeding up as you go, and keep going for a minute after it looks fine.

      The Way It's Done in Better Restaurants:

      Take the hot potatoes (Yukon Gold in the US are rather yummy for this) and, using a large thick-bottomed pot on a medium-high flame, add butter while slowly and gradually adding milk/cream (room temperature or better) and whisk (yeah, a whisk, and by hand), everything together. The process should take 15-30 minutes, depending on any number of factors, or, as they say in professional kitchens, until done. Salt to taste. The end result is perfect every time: silky smooth, light, fluffy (full of air), and at the perfect temperature.

      Note that you should be using unsalted butter (erroneously referred to as "sweet" on some supermarket brands). Butter is only as good as the cow is only as good as the grass it eats, so you decide what brand you select. In the kitchen, ingredients (not recipes) are everything. Incidentally, the reason why unsalted butter is exclusively used in a kitchen is so that you can determine (and decide) how much salt to add.

      As a side note, I'd never recommend using an electric anything unless you want to compromise and end up with subpar (but acceptable to the average guest/diner) results. That applies to a lot more (finely chopped anything, bread, pastries, nuts, etc.) than just mashed potatoes. Using a mixer will yield something that approaches gluey depending on how much you abuse the potatoes.

    3. Re:It's probably not "science"... by ttys00 · · Score: 1

      When I lived in London, my English housemate made potatoes this way. I'd never seen it done before, but they were the best potatoes I've ever eaten. We ate a meal of four potatoes once.

  15. Re:What the hell by StormyWeather · · Score: 4, Funny

    Actually I think the Turkey was 2nd runner up to be the national bird, but the bald eagle won out.

  16. Those are principles not 'principals' by hughbar · · Score: 1

    http://www.tiscali.co.uk/reference/dictionaries/english/data/d0082635.html grump, grump it's one of the pleasures of being old, no if only I could remember where I left my computer...

    --
    On y va, qui mal y pense!
  17. Re:You're a month late... Thanksgiving was in Octo by heinousjay · · Score: 0, Troll

    Good for you. Start Slashdot-Canada and stop coming to the US site to bitch about it being a US site.

    --
    Slashdot - where whining about luck is the new way to make the world you want.
  18. Bastards... by bigstrat2003 · · Score: 3, Funny

    I'm at work this morning, and now I'm hungry, you insensitive clods! :(

    --
    "16MB (fuck off, MiB fascists)" - The Mighty Buzzard
    1. Re:Bastards... by rubycodez · · Score: 1

      if you're in the U.S., your employers are insensitive clods!

  19. Re:Yeah sure! by IBBoard · · Score: 1

    Head first turkey? That has some rather worrying implications of the situations you could get yourself into!

  20. Re:What the hell by skoaldipper · · Score: 5, Funny

    Ever try chasing down a bald eagle with a fork and knife?

    --
    I hope, when they die, cartoon characters have to answer for their sins.
  21. Re:What the hell by zacronos · · Score: 1

    While I understand why that could have been taken as a joke, it probably wasn't. There is a belief that the US national bird was almost the Turkey, though it is most likely a myth.

  22. Smoked turkey by YrWrstNtmr · · Score: 2, Informative

    Prepare him how you want. Butter smeared over the skin, or a combo of spices, or whatever.

    Then pop him in a nice large grill for a few hours. Indirect heat of course. None of your punkass propane grills...has to be a regular charcoal grill. Pan of water in the bottom for a little steam. Baste/inject regularly. mmmmmm

    Mine is in now.

    1. Re:Smoked turkey by brjndr · · Score: 1

      The grill is good, the fryer is better. Deep fried Turkey is moist and delicious.

      You use peanut oil because of it's higher smoke point, and as long as the oil is hot enough (325-350 degrees) it sears outside of the bird, so the turkey doesn't absorb any oil. The searing also keeps all the moisture in the bird's meat. Once you go fried, you never go back.

    2. Re:Smoked turkey by barzok · · Score: 1

      Propane + hardwood chips works just fine.

  23. perfect turkey? Here's what most people miss: by westcoast+philly · · Score: 2, Informative

    First you BRINE the bird. kosher salt works well, but DO NOT use typical iodized table salt!!

    In a pot big enough to submerge the bird, pour 1 to 1-1/2 cups of the salt in. Then sink the bird. Let this soak for at least overnight. Don't worry, it won't be salty when it comes out, the salt only helps the meat hold moisture.

    When cooking, DO NOT cook to time. That whole X hours for Y lbs of turkey is bullshite. Use a thermometer. Cook it until it hits 160F-165F then pull it out.

    Also.... as a twist, before cooking, if you get your hands under the skin to seperate it from the meat, you can layer in a mixture of rosemary, garlic, and olive oil. and a layer of prociutto ham between the meat and skin. this makes it VERY tasty.

    Do that and you will have the juiciest and tastiest turkey you've ever eaten.

  24. Sniveling little whiners? by Nursie · · Score: 5, Insightful

    My dear boy,

    I'm British, we've caused tremendous amounts of harm all over the world and probably several genocides. I just find it rather delightful that every year American families gather together in a festival to give thanks and celebrate friendship, family and a spirit of kindness and sharing, brought about by an incident involving people their ancestors more-or-less wiped out and stole the land from.

    It's especially piquant that American children put on theatrical productions about how kind the indians were and how everyone was great friends.

    the whole thing's hilarious!

    1. Re:Sniveling little whiners? by TheRaven64 · · Score: 4, Funny

      My dear boy, I have to comment, because this is just such a superb way of beginning a post it deserves mod points irrespective of what else you say. In my mind, the rest of it was read by Noël Coward.

      I'm British You know, I'd never have guessed. There is such a thing as labouring a point, my good fellow.
      --
      I am TheRaven on Soylent News
    2. Re:Sniveling little whiners? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Insightful

      I guess people remember history how they want? Not what was fact or truth. It's more comforting to remember one of the few positive moments in early colonialism, rather than the endless atrocities that occurred during its creation.

      As an American, I remind myself today that despite all the hostility that was shown against the Native Americans in centuries past and current, there were moments when both the white man and Native Americans lived at peace with one another. It is for those times, which I prefer to celebrate today.

      Happy Thanksgiving!

    3. Re:Sniveling little whiners? by itsnotmi · · Score: 1

      ...but not nearly as funny as your "royals".

  25. First picture in TFA by simong · · Score: 1

    That's one tiny turkey. The last time I did a turkey for Christmas the smallest whole one I could find was about 10lbs so I got a turkey crown and there was still about six months supply left on Boxing Day.

  26. Harmful additives added to moisten turkeys by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Many chefs try to shortcut good cooking practices by adding the harmful additive Dihydrogen Monoxide to moisten their turkeys. Some even cook the turkey in bags to concentrate the Dihydrogen Monoxide at dangerous levels. Make sure your turkey is free of Dihydrogen Monoxide and refuse to eat it if it does.

  27. Re:You're a month late... Thanksgiving was in Octo by Rene+S.+Hollan · · Score: 1
    Three HUNDRED million Yanks can't be wrong.

    I'm a Canuck, and I celebrate Turkey Day when 91% of those that do, do.

    'Course, the fact that I live in San Diego, CA might have something to do with it.

    Interestingly, I will not be doing a traditional Thanksgiving meal this year: I'm getting together with a friend and we will likely partake of:

    Brunch: Lox omelet: smoked salmon folded into a three egg omelet with tomatoes and capers.

    Snack: Whole Grain Organic Pizza Toast: Fresh roast garlic on whole grain with flax bread, topped with Roma tomatoes, capers, grated Parmesan and Prosciutto, lightly baked and accented with cracked black pepper and a balsamic vinaigrette drizzle

    Dinner: Surf 'n Turf: Rare filet mignon on sizzling roasted garlic butter with shrimp and scallops in a saffron butter dill sauce, and a side of lemon-steamed broccoli.

    The next day, I'll probably make a simple veal scaloppini with capers and whole wheat angel hair pasta for dinner.

    I usually make a big pot of lean chili on the weekends and this weekend will be no exception.

    --
    In Liberty, Rene
  28. Good Eats called... by Bieeanda · · Score: 1

    Alton Brown wants his kitchen chemistry gimmick back.

    1. Re:Good Eats called... by 3waygeek · · Score: 2, Informative

      Actually, McGee (the author quoted in TFA) is one of AB's major sources.

  29. When it comes to understanding science by akijikan · · Score: 1

    behind food, the best mentor would have to be Alton Brown.

  30. Shouldn't the Slashdot subtitle today be ... by pauljlucas · · Score: 5, Funny

    Turkey for nerds. Stuffing that matters. :)

    --
    If you reply, do so only to what I explicitly wrote. If I didn't write it, don't assume or infer it.
  31. kitchen chemistry by shipbrick · · Score: 1

    I would have preferred an article about Kitchen Chemistry done on Turkey Day.

  32. Re:perfect turkey? Here's what most people miss: by Clover_Kicker · · Score: 1

    DO NOT use typical iodized table salt!! I've never brined a turkey, but plain old table salt works OK for chickens. Am I missing something?

  33. This versus stem cells by Besna · · Score: 1

    So, really, why does nobody mention morality here? Somehow, anything involving stem cells (or even something like the cervical cancer vaccine), immediately has to be about morality. I'm actually not even a vegetarian. I'm just curious.

  34. Kitchen chemistry illegal by LM741N · · Score: 1

    Kitchen Chemistry? I think that was a Loompanics book. Imagine sitting at your Thanksgiving meal and haviing the DEA in Kevlar outfits raid your turkey lab.

  35. Re:perfect turkey? Here's what most people miss: by westcoast+philly · · Score: 1

    I'm sure it works just fine, but do a comparison between table salt and fleur de sel (or any kind of natural, non-iodized variety) and the flavor is like night and day.

    I'm not the type to go all gourmet, I'll even eat bulk hot-dog weiners, but if you have the choice, go for the good stuff. Trust me, it's a huge differance.

    I had my turkey day last month, like all Canadians, and the bird turned out great with these methods, as it always does.

    Enjoy!

  36. You invented Turkey Twizzlers? You bastard! by giafly · · Score: 2, Interesting

    Turkey Twizzlers are spirals of mechanically reclaimed turkey meat, water, pork fat and rusk, together with many more minor ingredients, designed to be reheated before serving. The product became an emblem of the mass-produced processed food that [a UK tv chef] wanted to remove from schools. In the wake of the programme, several major catering organisations announced that they would no longer serve Turkey Twizzlers in schools. However, sales of Turkey Twizzlers rose 32%
    --
    Reduce, reuse, cycle
  37. Re:That's one tiny turkey. by giafly · · Score: 1

    That's the picture before they inject the added water. It shows a guy moving in with the brine syringe. The turkey will be plenty big enough after he finishes.

    --
    Reduce, reuse, cycle
  38. In other news by rtr1212 · · Score: 1

    Kill all my ancestors but allow me to have tax free casino's allowed only on Native American land and I'll be forever grateful to the US govt.

    1. Re:In other news by geekoid · · Score: 1

      Explain to me, exactly, how all your ancestors were killed, and yet you are here today?

      Also, cut out the biter. There is no one alive today that had anything to do with it. It was tragic and horrible but those people are gone. Should I be biter at the English for what they did against the Scots hundreds of years ago?
      Are you biter toward the other tribes that aided in killing some of your ancestors? Tribe were slaughtering each other for a long time before europeans settled.

      Not to mention most peoples ancestors weren't even in this country at the time.

      SO take your whiny crap and stuff it.

      --
      The Kruger Dunning explains most post on /. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dunning%E2%80%93Kruger_effect
  39. turkeys are boring! do a duck! by rubycodez · · Score: 1

    tasy delicious duck, stuffed with chopped citrus and pear and butter, basted with concentrated orange juice, vinegar and honey glaze. s Now that's a tasty thanksgiving day bird!

  40. Re:You're a month late... Thanksgiving was in Octo by armchair99 · · Score: 0

    I usually make a big pot of lean chili on the weekends and this weekend will be no exception. We'll expect a full report on the physics of an expanding gas on Monday then...http://zebu.uoregon.edu/~soper/Physics/gas.html
  41. Quick question by Besna · · Score: 1

    Do you feel the way about women who say they had a baby because they don't believe in abortions? Are they "better than you because they don't have abortions"?

    1. Re:Quick question by bigstrat2003 · · Score: 2, Insightful

      When they bring it up needlessly, yes. If a woman has a baby, that's her choice, same for if she gets an abortion. However, if, in a discussion on, say, the finer points of naming children, this woman said, "As a pro-lifer, I find it amusing that you abortionists don't know the etymology of the name Amanda," that would be acting "better" than the others. This would be for two reasons: a) she brought it into a discussion where it was completely needless to do so (as is the case in this thread), and b) she used a condescending tone in her speech (as is the case in this thread.

      --
      "16MB (fuck off, MiB fascists)" - The Mighty Buzzard
  42. Caustic Soda by Leibel · · Score: 1

    Funny you should say that. Each year my family makes an old German recipe for pretzels. To get the crusts nice, they use caustic soda, which is also used for clearing drains, and has lots of directions telling you what to do (very quickly) if someone eats it.

    My chemistry teach way back in High School refused to believe that we could eat the stuff and survive. She was sure I meant "baking soda" not "caustic soda".

  43. Re:What the hell by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Ever seen bald eagles in the wild? Nothing but large rats with wings [and bad attitudes.] We should have made the turkey the national bird and eaten the bald eagles.

  44. Re:perfect turkey? Here's what most people miss: by geekoid · · Score: 1

    Thanks for the skin tip, I'll try it on the next turkey I do.
    I prefer canola oil for birds.

    I would also suggest being sure at let the bird set for about 1/2 an hour before carving. Wrap in foil to keep warm.

    --
    The Kruger Dunning explains most post on /. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dunning%E2%80%93Kruger_effect
  45. fruit and meat by zogger · · Score: 1

    We did ours stuffed with oranges and basted with some good ole georgia peach cider. The gravy comes out pretty interesting.

    1. Re:fruit and meat by rubycodez · · Score: 1

      now thinking about Christmas goose...probably apricot - pecan bread & walnut stuffing inside, but am looking at recipes for funky glaze

  46. In Soviet kitchen- by X'16435934 · · Score: 0

    Turkey cook YOU!

    (and don't expect Greece to help!)


    --
    - Ecsad Essemal
    The Hexadecimal TV-REMOTE!
  47. Food safety ignored! by Muad'Dave · · Score: 1
    When the breast meat is around 40 and the leg meat is close to 60, he puts the bird into the oven.


    Food safety experts are having fits right about now - allowing raw poultry to warm to 60 on the countertop is a huge no-no.

    --
    Tiller's Rule: Never use a word in written form that you've only heard and never read. You will end up looking foolish.
    1. Re:Food safety ignored! by Vegeta99 · · Score: 1

      You'd be correct - that's why he recommends not doing it any longer than 3 hours beforehand. In any event, you're told that the turkey is done when the breast meat, the thickest part of the turkey, is 165F in the center - safe by then!

  48. Re:turkeys are boring! do a duck! by burdalane · · Score: 1

    Yesterday I roasted a turkey breast, basted with an orange juice, honey, and apricot preserve glaze, and it was tasty!

  49. Turkey? by cheesebilly · · Score: 1

    That was a VERY freaking small turkey in that article!!!!!

  50. Re:You're a month late... Thanksgiving was in Octo by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Good one, son. Very original. A real credit to your country.