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Microsoft Launches IT Superhero Comic
willdavid writes "Paul McDougall reports in InformationWeek on Microsoft's new online comic. The Heroes Happen Here comic strips are being created by Jordan Gorfinkel, a former DC Comics editor who helped revitalize the Batman series. 'Tech workers who in the middle of the night fix a downed server or take on a computer virus don't really have extraordinary powers. It just seems that way. But a new comic book has debuted in which IT pros literally are superheroes. The daily Web comic, called Heroes Happen Here, features tech savvy crime fighters like Lord Firewall, who "stands between chaos and order" and says things like "begone vermin!"'" And because it's never easy, in order to read the archives of the comic you're going to need to install Microsoft's Silverlight.
Will the main villains of this strip also feature an evil software company that abuses its monopoly?
Will the heroes use Open Source in a positive responsible manner?
Solomon
"Twice half-assed makes an ass whole." --Solomon K. Chang
VSS-Man, who possesses the mighty power of corrupting anything he touches.
If you haven't made a developer cry, you've wasted a day.
A MS superhero. Barf.
I don't mean to sound cruel, but what is their target audience? Anyone who isn't in IT is going to think this is amazingly stupid. Most of those in IT will probably be using firefox and therefor not be using Silverlight. In the end its free press for Microsoft, I guess.
snowulf.com
Ummmm, isn't that Scott Adams' shtick?
Is Linus or Steve the new Lex Luthor?
Access flow was our virtualization vendor, and I must say that they have my favorite corporate comics.
http://www.accessflow.com/pdf/ComicVMPowersLOW.pdf
I wonder I will still be their favorite customer after posting their several meg PDF on slashdot?
Read my Very Short "Stories"
This is currently being posted from a mere Slackware 12 system. I want to know if the Super Hero can configure my box to allow me to read these comics with having to involve the arch nemesis known as Silver Light. Also, if this hero could remove the engineered cyber-plague known as SharePoint, I would be in their debt!!!
i'm not sure if this offends me more as a cartoonist, or as someone who dislikes bad interfaces, or as a mac user. well, this is slashdot, so probably as a mac user, so as to heap more fuel on the fire. but the cartoonist in me is still crying.
read my comics, please, at http://www.funfactorycomic.com
MONKEY-BOY!
Will he team up with the Whiz Kids?
That explains why SQL Server 2008 will be late.
Looks to me like they don't really want to be associated with this. In fact I'm having trouble figuring out just why they bothered with the whole thing.
I guess that won't stop the oncoming shitstorm of unfunny MS-bashing, though. *pours gasoline on karma*
Tell me something...it's still "We, the people"... right?
I try to view the comic archives. Then it seems that it requires Silverlight, so I click the 'get silverlight' thing. Then eventually I'm imformed that my operating system/browser (Windows 2000/Firefox) combination is not supported. How about that.
So Microsoft is admitting that you do need super-human abilities to keep Microsoft's crap from bombing out.
Get the corporate geeks to load it on their systems by writing a comic strip about them, a comic strip that just happens to require Silverlight to view.
I _was_ going to give it a try. the first comic is boring. then oh my I had to install silverlight to see the rest of them? they must be desperate. xkcd here i come!
M
Real geeks have XKCD, Dilbert and BOFH to amuse them among other things.
It's just a ploy to get you to install Silverlight!
Admiral Ackbar: "It's a trap!"
The hero deploys a mail client that doesn't execute a fucking attachment when someone clicks it. Then the hero deploys a web browser that doesn't execute someone else's code when a user looks at a web page. Then the hero deploys an OS that doesn't load and execute code from removable media whenever the user inserts the media, and doesn't automatically treat somebody else's code as automatically executable simply because the user happened to save it and then clicked it in their file manager.
The climax of the story: the users never have any problems and never bother to call him to remove viruses, because they never get any. The users are bored and nobody knows why. Nobody knows the sacrifice the hero made, because it wasn't really a sacrifice and it ended up costing less. The hero, tragically depressed because he missed out on all the !!!GLORY!!! of cleaning up easily predictable and preventable messes, walks off into the sunset.
Sound like a good episode?
As copyright owner of this comment, I authorize everyone to defeat any technological measure which limits access to it.
Send in some stories! Also, MSFT is just sponsoring (as is Seagate), so I wouldn't be too concerned about their editorial influence.
Prediction: The real iPhone killer is going to be sex robots from Japan. Think about it.
Well, I guess if it is any good, and the target audience being what it is, a random guy will use the "PrtScrn+paint" rendering technology and post it somewhere, so I'll avoid installing Silverlight for this, thanks.
The daily Web comic, called Heroes Happen Here, features tech savvy crime fighters like Lord Firewall, who "stands between chaos and order" and says things like "begone vermin!"'
Since this is MS shouldn't his favourite saying be "Cancel or Allow?"
If I had to push Silverlight I'd immediately create a dozen porn sites allowing the download of free Silverlight encapsulated hires long movies. That would kill Flash in less than one month.
Are the two, um, heroes spooning in that last panel?
And hackers of the world fear him? What? That he'll eat them?
You know what's even lamer than Microsofts comic?
That it's tagged "gay". Come on, nothing more childish to say?
I sure hope Biclops gets some time in there.
God spoke to me.
And What sex are they? The big one could be a guy or a butch fat woman, and the one in the chair could be a woman or a really fem guy.
The other day, my SAN filled up with unauthorized images. My IT hero j*s*n, archived all the images for me so I could examine them in the privacy of my own home. He also cleared out the SAN so more images could show up.
Thank you, j*s*n! You're my hero!
Who else thinks there needs to be a repurposing site along the lines of the Dysfunctional Family Circus?
Anyone? Anyone? Just me? Oh, OK. (kicks pebble)
This is what they're doing to try and get us to install silverlight? Make this reason #923497832 why I can't stand this company.
You don't need silverlight to view the comics, if you subscribe to the RSS feed with an RSS viewer it displays them. I am using RSS Owl and have verified that this works personally.
Somehow I suspect that Microsoft's version of this will make me vomit a little in my mouth... just like everything else that Microsoft does. In fact I suspect that making people vomit in their mouths will be Microsoft's hero's super power.
I'm trying to teach myself to set people on fire with my mind... Is it hot in here?
Companies doing comics is nothing new. Radio Shack use to have electronics comics. BTW my hero is Flynn.
Somebody change the gates-borg icon. He is not representative of microsoft anymore. May be a borgized monkey should be the new icon. Whatever it is, it's got to change.
silly me. i thought the flashy "install silverlight" prompt was the comic. imagine my surprise that there's another comic hidden behind that.
will microsoft's innovation never cease?
/. is what happens when geeks talk. get used to it.
so WHY is the server down, WHY is there a virus getting in?
Obviously we need a [Mac,Linux,BSD,Amiga] superhero who can deal with these problems AT THE SOURCE.
yes, go Cloverdale on Redmond....
I find it interesting that Silverlight is announced as 'cross-platform' on its home page, and the compatibility chart lists Mac OS-10X, yet the license agreement only permits use on XP and Vista????
V for Vendetta: People should not be afraid of their governments. Governments should be afraid of their people.
Talk about expanding yourself into ridiculous areas, that they need not be in. Write a fucking OS that isnt full of bloated shit, and supports all major graphic file formats, all open source and major video/audio codecs, a secure os without DRM, an OS that runs FASTER than previous versions...
JUST DO THAT.
Enough with the stupid attempts at trying to be as cool as google or yahoo. You're fucking Microsoft. You were never cool. STOP IT.
The daily Web comic, called Heroes Happen Here, features tech savvy crime fighters like Lord Firewall, who "stands between chaos and order" and says things like "begone vermin!"'
So, does this "Lord Firewall" work for, or against, Microsoft?
I'd be worried about anyone, IT or otherwise, who "says things like "begone vermin!""
They are reeaallly stooping low to make this require Silverlight. Nobody else wants to use this product, so just pay people to use it. Brilliant!
:)
- Donating money to non-profits and earmarking the money to transform their Flash web sites into Silverlight
(I went to a BaltoMSDN presentation on Silverlight, done by the guys who did the conversion)
- Making webcomics that use Silverlight
- Displaying a nag screen on MS download sites recommending that people use the new Silverlight download manager
No one came imagine the hilarity of my laugh once someone writes a tool to convert the comic into Flash.
Try pixton (http://www.pixton.com/home). YOu can make a comic in flash to ridicule the MS silverlight comic site.
Now Apple's going to come out with a comic with better artwork, but with simpler story lines an fewer characters. And you'll have to buy it on iTunes.
Saying your "phone ran out of batteries" is like saying your "car ran out of gas tanks".
Desperate much?
The Kruger Dunning explains most post on
Read as:
The hell with Silverfish
OMG, this is great! The valiant members of IT Support can fight off the hordes of FOSSie Zealots, Puling Stallmanistas, and most evil of all, the corrupt anti-MS Pointy Haired Boss who read was brainwashed by an article he read in eWeak, who wants to destroy why IT Support spent decades building so he can spread the disease of Teh Lunix!!
It makes my day job feel so... heroic!!
Does the hero or the villain throw the chairs?
I clicked the link.
Drawing looked decent, so I click it.
Requires Silverlight.
I am not going to install Silverlight for a Comic Strip or any other website content that works just as well without it.
I don't care enough about that website to install Silverlight.
That website just lost a prospective repeat visitor.
Silverlight just cost you, prospective silverlight-only website operator, money.
Thank you Microsoft, for this great lesson on why not to use Silverlight.
It isn't even funny. It isn't even remotely funny, nor particularly entertaining, and barely makes sense for that matter.
And the stereotyping is just sad - but what do you expect from 'an outsider'. Not all technical people are 1. overweight, 2. wear druggie shirts, nor 3. give a shit about hackers. And it's also pushing that other sickening stereotype that seems to pervade American comedy - that guys are bumbling/overweight 'lovable fools' and girls are smart and classy/usually at least a bit hot.
A very strange form of viral marketing for their craptastic clone of the craptastic flash software though. I imagine it could only be dreamt up in the strange cultures that develop in the closed world that Microsoft and other large companies seem to develop. (Novell was almost cult-like, and a little scary to be honest). I bet they thought it would be really 'cool', 'nifty', and 'hip', and no doubt plenty of their cult-members think the same.
_
\\/ are accustomed' - First Lensman
No, they just have Microsoft systems. The UNIX guys are all asleep.
Action Item, The Professional Superhero!
Tsunami -- You can't bring a good wave down!
> And because it's never easy, in order to read the archives of the comic you're going to need to install Microsoft's Silverlight.
Obviously, they don't want me to read it then; I'm happy to oblige --- userfriendly is just fine thankyouverymuch...
When things get tough, he turns blue and freezes solid.
To get him going again, you have to stuff three fingers up, um, er, nevermind.
http://blogs.technet.com/hhh_comic/default.aspx
In consideration for the chance for your story to be used in an upcoming comic, you agree to the following: Any stories or other content (collectively, "Submissions") which you submit to this Website shall become the sole and exclusive property of Gorftext Productions Inc. d/b/a Avalanche Comics Entertainment ("GPI").
You hereby grant and assign to GPI as a "work-made-for-hire" under the United States Copyright Act, as amended, the absolute right, title and interest in and to your Submissions, for the United States of America and all countries of the world, with the unqualified right of GPI to assign, transfer or license the Submissions and any elements thereof, in whole or in part, and to create and use derivative works based thereon or to alter, modify, adapt, distribute or otherwise use and exploit the Submissions, derivatives thereof or any elements of any of them in any form or medium. In the event that any Submissions are not considered a "work-made-for-hire", you hereby assign and agree to assign all right, title and interest in and to such Submissions, including all copyrights therein, throughout the world, in perpetuity, to GPI.
You represent and warrant that: (i) you are the sole author of the Submissions submitted by you, (ii) your Submissions do not violate the privacy rights, publicity rights, copyrights, intellectual property rights, or any other rights of any person, and (iii) the posting of your Submissions on the Website does not result in a breach of any contract between you and a third party.
..you just *know* someone will 'shop it with a swastika instead of a cross...or lightning bolts...
so - I read the abstract, clicked the link, then read the comic. it's not funny ... or .... um... I don't even know how to describe it - I actually had a hard time reading it and had to go back and read it again ... twice... just to understand who was saying what ... but I can't figure out why they were saying the things they were - are these two people friends? lovers? co-workers? and why is this guy reading over this girl's shoulder so intently that he can understand things on the page better than she can? and where did she get the receipt? I just don't get it ...
so I jumped over here to read the comments and no one posted about how awful the comic was - just about how awful the idea of the comic and/or microsoft was (is). did anyone else read it? it's really stupid
calling all destroyers
Upon first glance, that's honestly what it looked like.
Tag this article 'herpeshappenhere'
Its almost as if both names were made up in the same meeting.
http://michaelsmith.id.au
Why would I need Microsoft Silverlight to view a few JPG images of their comic?
:-D
I guess only Microsoft knows the answer to that enigma.
I think I'll just stick to XKCD and Salad Fingers* then.
* Sure, that one needs Flash, but that's at least motivated since it's nost just a comic.
Beware: In C++, your friends can see your privates!
I see him more as a knock-off of a MegaMan villain, namely Chair Man.
So you could have Chairman Ballmer, with a big chair logo on his chest, throws exploding chairs at you while chanting "DEVELOPERS DEVELOPERS DEVELOPERS!" and doing a monkey dance.
http://xkcd.com/225/ -- Open Source
http://xkcd.com/353/ -- Python
http://xkcd.com/208/ -- Regular Expressions
http://xkcd.com/91/ -- Pwned
http://xkcd.com/316/ -- Loud sex
http://xkcd.com/350/ -- Network
http://xkcd.com/278/ -- Black Hat Support
http://xkcd.com/196/ -- Command Line Fu
http://xkcd.com/341/ -- 1337: Part 1
http://xkcd.com/342/ -- 1337: Part 2
http://xkcd.com/343/ -- 1337: Part 3
http://xkcd.com/344/ -- 1337: Part 4
http://xkcd.com/345/ -- 1337: Part 5
http://xkcd.com/340/ -- Fight (boot sector)
I won't install Silverlight until there's a Firefox extension like Flashblock for it. No way I'm running unsecured web code.
...population you.
Now wash your hands.
(rot13) rpbzbab@tznvy.pbz
Is Microsoft's Bob getting a new job?
Microsoft launches User Friendly killer.
from the title I was expecting more in the lines of "The incredible adventures of Clippy"
...Apparently i have reached a point where I literally have too much time on my hands. I know this becuase I took enough time to take a look at the new comic strip (being a fan of Batman), hoping Jordan Gorfinkel might actually deliver some creativity. Um, looks like the same crew that dreamed up Windows ME (now known as Vista) are the (ahem) talent responsible for the story line.
Hands down the absolute worst abuse of a noble medium I have ever witnessed in my 39 years, and 2 min of my life that would have been better spent reading U.S. tax code from 1977.
It is so absolutely stereotypically / artificially 'geeked out' that it completely fails to generate any humor amid contrived situations riddled with tech jargon -- ha ha ha, tech people can understand the terms so they MUST find it funny, right? Yawn.
Ok, ok, sorry for the ramble, but it was literally SO bad I just had to say something.
For your reading pleasure at http://www.ubersoft.net/.
You might want to start at the beginning: http://www.ubersoft.net/comic/hd/1996/03/alex-loss-words
..."We don't need another hero"..."We need life beyound Thunderdome"
...Windows Live $microsoft_product_du_jour.
/. lameness filter wasn't so LAME.)
(Variable name would be in CAPS if the
That sounds like C. S. Lewis, whereupon for one hour per day Ballmer recants his ways when the spell wears off, and admits what he has done. Then the illusion reforms, and he is off laying more traps.
I wonder if Tad Williams, who wrote Sea of Silver Light has talked to MS about SilverLight yet.
My first Journal Entry ever, in 8 years! http://slashdot.org/journal/365947/aphelion-scifi-fantasy-horror-poetry-webzine
Except written by middle management!
(cut scene) :)
And there stands Whiteox, overlooking the valley of IT that will be his burden for years to come.
How can he fight the Trolls and the Spammers all at once?
And what about his nemesis, the evil (insert name here), who has modded him down on more than one occasion?
And Grandma! What about Grandma who still can't work out how to send an attachment?
Will Vista and the new gaming machine he's got to build next week really perform? Had he made the right decisions regarding the overclocked 8800GT and the X38 chipset?
Is 4 gig of DDR2 1200 really worth it? - just so Jamie can play DirectX 10 games???
Stay tuned for next month's most engaging episode: "Whiteox and the Trials of Soldering Accidentally Cut Tracks on a Motherboard" out soon.
Don't be apathetic. Procrastinate!
The drawing is nicely done, the colors are just right. But heck. this thing is not funny, is not even vaguely interesting enough to be read.
Your ad could be here!
As absolutely fascinating as this... um... almost sounds, I'm still going to have to Just Say No to Silverfish.
they can use the comic to prevent negative press on craptacular products like microsoft bob, windows me, and the 7 chinese brothers known as vista. after all, it's a FANTASY
Remember kids, if you're not paying for the service, YOU ARE THE PRODUCT THAT IS BEING SOLD.
hmm, kind of like if king of queens was about a microsoft developer living off the ranch in oregon
Remember kids, if you're not paying for the service, YOU ARE THE PRODUCT THAT IS BEING SOLD.
..."need to install Microsoft's Silverlight."
Damnit, why weren't they the first few words.
Is it just me, or is reading that thing like trying to read the warm monitor glow of /. after just getting out of bed? When Microsoft HR told comic guy it's time for him to bloom, he took it programmer literal. o_O
I can't even make this into a GREAT quote/commment... but HOLY CRAP-FEST GATEMAN! This is the dumbest thing I've seen since the copyright superhero.. and yes, another "wonderful m$ program" you need to install... *sarcasm noted here*
Ok, what is it? MS Week or something? I've not seen as many MS stories on /. since Vista was released^H^H^H^Hkicked out the door.
Assorted stuff I do sometimes: Lemuria.org
sage
But... the future refused to change.
As an aside it seems that the art is handled by Udon Entertainment, a company responsible for many comics based on Capcom videogame licenses as well as the art for the upcoming downloadable remake of Super Street Fighter II Turbo.
It's a bizarre venture by Microsoft, to be sure, but at least they hired some real pros to handle the whole thing.
There can only be one IT superhero and she is Motoko Kusanagi!
I haven't looked in the archives, because there's no bloody way I'm installing Microsoft's next delivery of concentrated FAIL on my computer, but from the current strip it looks like Clippy deserves a home here.
From that site:
" bought to you by Microsoft and Seagate "
"Now McBride, initiate the laser boost sequencing pentode!"
"Yesh mashter"
Forget about why MS did this. Is it a good idea to use a rich client like silverlight/flash/whatever to present a Web Comic? Sure it looks great, but it takes longer to load, which can definitely be a factor if you're going to visit the site daily, I mean, I woudn't like to wait 3-5 seconds to then enter the navigation and see the comic, this when the plugin doesn't crash firefox. Second, I don't know if the full screen is a good idea. I mean, if you're doing a full blown comic, it's ok, but you won't be able to do that on a daily basis for too long, and if it was supposed to be a strip, then I would want it to be in its tab, or together with other strips in a rss feed, or something like that. Which brings us to another problem: how are you going to let other people hotlink your strip if it's an application? Of course there are ways to do this, but is it worth the trouble? Think about it, there are tons of web comics out there, and some with cash to spend in flash or other amenities, and yet, none of them does this. They just render the image, in plain old HTML, with the navigation nearby.
rm -f *.exe
Soon as I saw the article, I was reminded of the "ever popular" Captain Euro. http://www.captaineuro.com/
[longtime Atari fan mode]
The guy has got a shirt which reads, "DO THE MATH"
This happens to be the Atari tagline for the Jaguar. And I feel that something is seriously wrong here, since almost any Atari enthusiast loved Atari (and often Apple) while disliked Microsoft.
[/longtime Atari fan mode]
Pumbaa! I don't wonder; I know.
This is like a comedic gift from the gods. George W. Bush hasn't created as much material in 8 years as this one comic will. Outstanding, out-fucking-standing. I'm not even going to start making open source=kryptonite jokes since I know everyone else has beaten me to every comedic punch, most likely with a "biff," "pow," or "zowie!" sound effect.
Kwisatz Haderach
Sell the spice to CHOAM
This Mahdi took Shaddam's Throne
The PHB is, in reality, Steven J. Vaughn-Nichols, noted plagiarist and Lunix propagandist.
What is so hard about turning it off and on again?
This makes me pine even more for the old Turboman ads...
N4st0r, trixx0r h0bb1tz0rz! Th3y st0l3 0ur pr3c10uzz!
1. Microsoft launches IT Superhero Comic 2. World points 3. World laughs 4. ...
5. PROFIT!!
Cool! Microsoft Bob finally got his cape!