Slashdot Mirror


Interesting Uses For a USB LED Screen?

Hogwash McFly writes "My boss gave me one of those USB-powered red LED scrolling displays as a Christmas gift, and while cycling the usual 'I read your emails' and 'ID10T Error' messages will be entertaining for a day or two, I was wondering if it could be put to more constructive uses. The configuration file is plaintext and supports different scroll speeds, flashing, bitmaps, and WAV sounds. The font is defined as 5x5 pixels per character, also stored in plaintext as 5 hex values, one for each vertical line of pixels. A dynamically generated message could prove useful in my day-to-day work on the helpdesk, but are there any interesting uses beyond network notifications and news feeds?"

403 comments

  1. Matrix by Tubal-Cain · · Score: 4, Funny

    Matrix screensaver.

    1. Re:Matrix by fyngyrz · · Score: 5, Funny

      Depending the the tolerance level at your job for some of these; mix and match as many as you like, just give 'em ID headers:

      • Time since last paycheck
      • Time until next paycheck
      • Salary graph tracking COL index
      • Company stock price
      • Current project status (your own little twitter)
      • Sharon: Not that I'm asking for a date, but you're totally hot. Just so you know.
      • Yes, I'd like a donut, thank you
      • Anyone know where the specification has gotten off to?
      • Can I bring my cat to work?
      • The perfume level today is STIFLING
      • Has anyone seen the TPS reports?
      • Questions? Please use email so I can timeshift: me@subnet.here.tld
      • I'm sorry, the specification is frozen.
      • Last page hit on the webserver (just "tail" the log and trivially parse it out)
      • Next upcoming cron event
      • Can I have a Mac, please?
      • I hate the toolbar
      • I hate the tabs
      • I hate... FITB
      • Time until 5pm (or quitting, whatever it is)
      • Time until lunch, then time until quitting
      • Days until vacation
      • Decades since you've been laid
      • URL of favorite website
      • Name of software you think people should try
      • Hours until your next date
      • # lines of code written today
      • # keystrokes today
      • Approximate hangover depth
      • The Software Priesthood Still Lives
      • ...
      --
      I've fallen off your lawn, and I can't get up.
    2. Re:Matrix by interploy · · Score: 3, Funny

      Fill it with internet memes.

    3. Re:Matrix by Tubal-Cain · · Score: 3, Funny

      I can haz Mac, plze?

      There. Fixed it for you.

    4. Re:Matrix by huckda · · Score: 2, Interesting

      toilet paper sensors..warning which stalls are nearly out.

      notification of who didn't wash their hands after using the restroom

      notification of when the coffee pot is nearly empty.

      dupe'd slashdot articles

      latest site brought to a screeching halt due to the /. effect

      tracking the U.S. deficit in real-time

      --
      "Just Smile and Nod." --Huck
    5. Re:Matrix by SleptThroughClass · · Score: 2, Funny

      Fill it with internet memes.

      In Soviet Russia, all your base haz Mac dancing, RLY.

    6. Re:Matrix by cbiltcliffe · · Score: 5, Funny

      tracking the U.S. deficit in real-time

      ERROR: Buffer overflow. Integer out of range.

      --
      "City hall" in German is "Rathaus" Kinda explains a few things......
    7. Re:Matrix by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      Fill it with internet memes.

      With a row of 5x5 pixel characters, Goatse is going to be limited to '=3OE='

    8. Re:Matrix by beav007 · · Score: 2, Funny

      I was going to say the same thing about /. dupes...

    9. Re:Matrix by pnevin · · Score: 0, Redundant

      This really needs mod points.

    10. Re:Matrix by fractoid · · Score: 4, Funny

      I seem to recall a forum thread over at gamedev.net which was basically a competition to generate the simplest recognizable goatse ascii. The aftermath was that for months it was a bannable offense to post the following three characters in sequence:
      =0=

      --
      Rampant carbon sequestration destroyed the Dinosaurs' tropical paradise. I'm here to help repair the damage.
    11. Re:Matrix by extrasolar · · Score: 1

      =3OE=

      Sorry, dude? That's just gross. Some of us browse slashdot at work you know!

    12. Re:Matrix by Samah · · Score: 1
      • Can you get some milk on the way home please?
      • NullPointerException at...
      • The system has encountered a fatal error and will be shut down.
      • It looks like you're writing a letter, would you like help with that?
      • Segmentation fault: core dumped.
      • Kernel panic: USB LED Panel detected!
      --
      Homonyms are fun!
      You're driving your car, but they're riding their bikes there.
    13. Re:Matrix by ITEric · · Score: 1

      "Have you tried turning it off and turning it back on again?"

      --
      The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds new discoveries, is not 'Eureka!' but 'That's funny...
    14. Re:Matrix by Vastad · · Score: 1, Informative

      • I hate... FITB

      FITB? Fucking In The Boardroom?

    15. Re:Matrix by complete+loony · · Score: 1

      A couple of guys at work set up an XMPP client that can control some scrolling text on a monitor. Perhaps if you first concentrate on making it easy to display something, you will later think of interesting things to display.

      --
      09F91102 no, 455FE104 nope, F190A1E8 uh-uh, 7A5F8A09 that's not it, C87294CE no. Ah! 452F6E403CDF10714E41DFAA257D313F.
    16. Re:Matrix by hey · · Score: 1

      I thought I knew *nix. How do you get the next cron event? I mean is there an easy way? Of course, you could parse all crontabs, sort, etc. But would be a miniproject. Thanks.

    17. Re:Matrix by hey · · Score: 0, Redundant

      I thought I knew *nix. But I don't know an easy way to get the next cron event. Do you?
      Thanks.

    18. Re:Matrix by fyngyrz · · Score: 1

      Read the crontab(s); parse 'em; look at the current time; pick next event. Be just a few lines of Python, certainly not a big deal.

      --
      I've fallen off your lawn, and I can't get up.
    19. Re:Matrix by hey · · Score: 1

      I think you underestimate how hard it would be.
      Here's an example from "man crontab"..

                # use /bin/sh to run commands, overriding the default set by cron
                SHELL=/bin/sh
                # mail any output to `paul', no matter whose crontab this is
                MAILTO=paul
                #
                # run five minutes after midnight, every day
                5 0 * * * $HOME/bin/daily.job >> $HOME/tmp/out 2>&1
                # run at 2:15pm on the first of every month -- output mailed to paul
                15 14 1 * * $HOME/bin/monthly
                # run at 10 pm on weekdays, annoy Joe
                0 22 * * 1-5 mail -s "It's 10pm" joe%Joe,%%Where are your kids?%
                23 0-23/2 * * * echo "run 23 minutes after midn, 2am, 4am ..., everyday"
                5 4 * * sun echo "run at 5 after 4 every sunday"

      Not a thesis project but then not easy either.
      It would be cool if crontab had an option that would tell you the next event.

    20. Re:Matrix by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Hours until your next date.

      Sorry the machine can't see that far into the future.

    21. Re:Matrix by Timex · · Score: 1

      This:

      dupe'd slashdot articles

      ...or this:

      tracking the U.S. deficit in real-time

      Which value is larger? It's difficult to say...

      --
      When politicians are involved, everyone loses.
    22. Re:Matrix by fyngyrz · · Score: 1

      Hmm. I don't really see the difficulty. Are you saying that because $HOME etc. may be defined at a level you can't get at without adding more cron lines, the rest of the parsing isn't useful, or that the command / event has to be completely parsed, as opposed to displayed as written?

      My thought was that a useful output might be:

      Next CRON event @ 10:00pm: mail -s "It's 10pm" joe%Joe,%%Where are your kids?%

      This would appear days 1-5, and not the other two, and accompanied by the monthly event when appropriate. All you really have to do is figure out the time encoding, which is trivial, then anything that is past, you skip, while the very next event, you dump. Not difficult. For most things, I think you'd know just what you were looking at, too, at least if you had an interest in such things in the first place.

      Doesn't tell you the mail will go to paul; but then again, if it's your crontab, you probably knew that anyway, eh?

      --
      I've fallen off your lawn, and I can't get up.
    23. Re:Matrix by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      How about (short) fortune messages?

      Or "I want a cookie" message that display during a very short time (subliminal)!?

  2. ping times to websites where uptimes matter by way2trivial · · Score: 4, Interesting
    --
    every day http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:Random
    1. Re:ping times to websites where uptimes matter by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      ... which unfortunately only supports Hitachi HD44780 based LCD character display.

    2. Re:ping times to websites where uptimes matter by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      I believe that falls under the author's excepting "are there any interesting uses beyond network notifications and news feeds?"

  3. Notification for everything by TeXMaster · · Score: 4, Interesting

    Unless you plan to put it in your car to give the finger to people honking at you in queue, the only use for LCD screens i can think of is notification. Considering the recent interest in Gnome and KDE for a centralized notification system, you could probably hook _that_ up for your LCD screen so you'd get _all_ notifications.

    --
    "I'm never quite so stupid as when I'm being smart" (Linus van Pelt)
    1. Re:Notification for everything by d3ac0n · · Score: 1

      Unless you plan to put it in your car to give the finger to people honking at you in queue

      I've always wanted to do that. Seems like it would be fun to have something I can use to give people nasty or confusing messages with.

      >:)

      --
      Official Heretic from the "Church of Global Warming". Proven right thanks to whistle blowers. AGW = Flat Earth Theory
    2. Re:Notification for everything by Shakrai · · Score: 5, Funny

      Unless you plan to put it in your car to give the finger to people honking at you in queue

      Why give 'em the finger? You could generate messages instead:

      "If you are close enough to read this, watch out for brake checks."
      "This car protected by Smith & Wesson"
      "If I passed you on the right you are in the wrong fucking lane"
      "My kid beat up your honor student"
      "Bad cop. No donut."

      The possibilities are endless ;)

      --
      I want peace on earth and goodwill toward man.
      We are the United States Government! We don't do that sort of thing.
    3. Re:Notification for everything by mpathetiq · · Score: 5, Interesting

      "If I passed you on the right you are in the wrong fucking lane"

      This is the one I would use the most. Apparently Ohioans don't understand the term "passing lane".

    4. Re:Notification for everything by Tubal-Cain · · Score: 5, Funny

      >:)

      I see... an Asteroids-esque space ship during reentry.

    5. Re:Notification for everything by Gothmolly · · Score: 4, Insightful

      I hope our far-left overlords are more benevolent than the far-right ones were.
      If you think that the incoming President is far-left and the old President was far-right, then you need a refresher course in both politics and civics.

      --
      I want to delete my account but Slashdot doesn't allow it.
    6. Re:Notification for everything by SCHecklerX · · Score: 1

      "Hey baby, you're hot"

    7. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      LED, not LCD.

      RTFT (last 'T' stands for "Title")

    8. Re:Notification for everything by fishyfool · · Score: 1

      Have your fellow Idahoians been moving to California? There seems to have been an increase of slow-drivers-that-won't-move-over here. Recently.

      --
      Enjoy Every Sandwich
    9. Re:Notification for everything by mpathetiq · · Score: 2, Funny

      I don't know any Idahoians here in Ohio, so I cannot answer your question. Well, I suppose I could answer "mu". :)

    10. Re:Notification for everything by bhtooefr · · Score: 1

      Part of it is the annoying tendency of ODOT to put "THROUGH TRAFFIC KEEP LEFT" signs in cities. Good job, ODOT, now you've made everyone into a left lane hog.

      (I keep as far right as possible, myself.)

    11. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Insightful

      George Bush is NOT on the far right, at least not what the far right used to be. He's invented a whole new category, and moved a bunch of people from the right into that.

      I can't speak to the claim about Obama, I don't know the subtle nuances of the factions on the left. I can say he's against gay marriage, and his health care plan is only about 10% of what a real universal health care plan would be.

    12. Re:Notification for everything by Xaoswolf · · Score: 1

      Do they offer classes in sarcasm and comedic signatures?

    13. Re:Notification for everything by mpathetiq · · Score: 1

      In cities, I can handle it - things are messed up enough as is - but when you're on the highway, GET OVER, DOUCHEBAGS. I imagine it comes from crappy drivers' ed teachers; mine told me to always drive in the left lane so you "have more opportunities to avoid an accident." I'm not sure how that would work...

    14. Re:Notification for everything by Kleen13 · · Score: 2, Funny

      "God was my copilot but I crashed in the mountains and had to eat him."

      --
      That sinking feeling deep in your gut when you KNOW you screwed up bad summed up with: {head desk} {head desk}
    15. Re:Notification for everything by Mikya · · Score: 2, Funny

      What does the second "T" stand for?

    16. Re:Notification for everything by Hal_Porter · · Score: 1, Funny

      Unless you plan to put it in your car to give the finger to people honking at you in queue

      I've always wanted to do that. Seems like it would be fun to have something I can use to give people nasty or confusing messages with.

      >:)

      Jesus christ it's a .... Oh never mind.

      --
      echo -e 'global _start\n _start:\n mov eax, 2\n int 80h\n jmp _start' > a.asm; nasm a.asm -f elf; ld a.o -o a;
    17. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      mine told me to always drive in the left lane so you "have more opportunities to avoid an accident." I'm not sure how that would work...

      Easy- you can pull right, AND pull left to avoid things!

    18. Re:Notification for everything by pha3r0 · · Score: 1
      Well I'm sure you meant Ohioans but as a former Californian recently moved to Idaho I can say two things: Firstly there is far more mover-overers here then in CA. Secondly I have seen a huge increase in run-up-your-arse-like-we-did-in-california'ers here.

      So remember, We don't care how it was done in California

    19. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      It's an LED screen, you illiterate clod.

    20. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Insightful

      That isn't half as annoying as those people who zip up and ride on my bumper when I'm already in the left lane trying to pass someone -- so fast I didn't see them coming -- and then they try to swerve over and get around me on the right side the moment I'm a car length ahead and about to pull to the right myself (and probably signaling my intentions to do so).

      Yes, I know I'm supposed to be on the right when not passing -- SO GIVE ME THE @#%#%^@! time and space to get over there safely when I'm done, preferably without forcing me to cut off the person I just passed.

      For every slow and clueless driver in the left lane I'll bet somewhere there is an impatient and dangerous left-lane tailgater. I need a sign saying "I was already passing when you zoomed up. Give me a moment and I'll be pulling to the right out of your way, asshole".

    21. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      WOOHOO .. i am not the only person who is sick and tired of passing idiots on the right.

      Does anyone really understand that the left lane (USA) is the passing lane and not the "Drive-slow-WooHoo-I'm-all-by-myself-and-I-have-nowhere-to-go-and-all-day-to-get-there!" lane????

    22. Re:Notification for everything by ReverendLoki · · Score: 4, Insightful

      What planet have you been on for the last 8 years?

      I know it is sometimes an easy mistake to make, but far-stupid != far-right.

      --
      09 F9 11 02 9D 74 E3 5B D8 41 56 C5 63 56 88 C0
    23. Re:Notification for everything by zippthorne · · Score: 2, Insightful

      "If I passed you on the right you are in the wrong fucking lane"

      I had just put my turn signal on, you dumbass, and I was waiting for the lane to clear when you zipped over to pass me. If you'd been the least bit patient, you wouldn't have had to slow down even.

      A quick lesson: The turn signal indicates my intention to maneuver. It is not an instruction for you to maneuver into the space that I've indicated my intention to occupy. Especially when I'm just trying to get out of your way.

      --
      Can you be Even More Awesome?!
    24. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I take it you drive in the speeder's lane.

    25. Re:Notification for everything by ericski · · Score: 3, Interesting

      So many people have moved to Idaho that our old traffic patterns are no longer valid. For instance, it has been ages since I've seen a tractor (John Deere, not Mac truck) on the freeway :). You learn to not run up on one of those. A dirt clod can dislodge from a tire at any time and do serious damage to a windshield. Or so I've heard....

    26. Re:Notification for everything by clone53421 · · Score: 2, Insightful

      If you're driving around where I live, people will actually mostly respect your turn signal. Unless you're a dumbass and have it blinking inanely when you could have successfully completed the action ten seconds ago, but I trust you're not one of those people.

      As a result, when I complain about idiots driving slowly in the left lane, it isn't because they couldn't get over. It's because they could have and they were too stupid to do so. If they really can't get over, I can wait until they can, but they sure as hell better take the opportunity when they can safely move over.

      --
      Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
    27. Re:Notification for everything by dzfoo · · Score: 2, Insightful

      I guess his reasoning, misguided as it may be, was that the rightmost lanes would normally have more people driving at mismatched speeds, merging onto traffic, or crossing over in order to make it out through an exit ramp. Therefore, the left lane would have less opportunity of collisions.

              -dZ.

      --
      Carol vs. Ghost
      ...Can you save Christmas?
    28. Re:Notification for everything by mpathetiq · · Score: 1

      You're probably right. He was about to retire, so I bet instead of teaching us how to handle the mismatched speeds, merging, etc., he took the easy way out and said "just stay to the left." It was probably a little less stress on his ticker to do that too. I know riding around with green drivers make me nearly go into cardiac arrest. I can't imagine doing it all day.

    29. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Neither to Utards (re: utah idiots)

    30. Re:Notification for everything by FredFredrickson · · Score: 1

      That happens to me a lot. I prefer safe distances before pulling back into the right lane. People always use that gap to zip around me.

      I always feel like running people off the road, but, I guess that'd ruin the point of trying to be safe.

      --
      Belief? Hope? Preference?The Existential Vortex
    31. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      That must be a southern California thing. I've been in northern California for five years or so now and haven't noticed the tailgating. The problem here seems to be about 25% of the drivers are just batshit crazy. I can't tell you the number of accidents I've witnessed in my time here just due to absolutely stupid moves.

      Minnesota is the place to go for tailgating. 90% of the drivers think the 2 second rule is the 2 inch rule and they get pissed off if you're not as close to the guy in front of you as they are behind you.

    32. Re:Notification for everything by clone53421 · · Score: 2, Insightful

      "Safe"? If someone else can zip around you, you had plenty of space to safely move to the right. (Even if what they did was unsafe, you had a full car length more than they did.)

      The key thing is: If you're moving faster than the car to your right (and you'd better be, if you're trying to pass it) and there's no reason for you to slow down or stop in the near future (easily determined by looking ahead), there's absolutely no reason why about two car lengths isn't enough space to hit your blinker and start moving over. Much more than 2 car lengths, though, and the person behind you is going to get irritated (especially if you're doing a slow pass instead of finishing the damn maneuver and getting over to the right).

      --
      Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
    33. Re:Notification for everything by Laser_iCE · · Score: 2, Interesting

      >:)

      I see... an Asteroids-esque space ship during reentry.

      That's about as stupid as the time that I read someone on /. saying that 4:3 looks like a guy in a paperhat...

      Oh, now I see it.

    34. Re:Notification for everything by jjhall · · Score: 1

      Just remember when you move here to forget everything you learned driving-wise in California and re-learn it all the correct way. :-)

      Welcome to Idaho!

    35. Re:Notification for everything by Jim4Prez · · Score: 1

      That is a strange thing I noticed after being born-n-raised in the NE. Up in the NE, people just don't understand the term "passing lane". Basically, everyone driver seems to say in their mind, "yeah, you can go around me, biatch!."

      Now I live in the South. After living here a few years, I noticed, in SC at least, people consistently move over for a vehicle going faster then them in the left lane.

      It was a strange thing to me at first, since I was from the NE. However I quickly adapted and now get out of the "fast" lane even if I am going 75 when the speed limit is 60 and someone is behind me doing 85-90.

      I originally thought, cool, some drivers with a conscience? Nope. Here in SC what I see is driver after driver that will change lanes to let you pass (cool eh?), but drivers that also speed up if you even freaking turn your head to look at your passenger mirror. Putting on your right turn signal here in SC means that EVERY driver in the lane you want to merge into _must_ accelerate, regardless of circumstances.

      It has been a very freaky thing. I have lived in several states up and down the East coast. I noticed in the Virginia area, EVERY freaking driver seems to LOVE their break pedal. Get even too close to a Virginia driver and, bam, he/she slams the breaks as if they are saying, "get off my @ss biatch".

      When I lived in Florida for 8 years, well that place was just a mess because you never know what the driver in-front, next-to or even near you will do. They can be from any state and good luck guessing how they will drive!

      Since you live in Ohio, at least you know what to expect. Just driving in Orlando, FL, what a mess. I remember thinking how I missed the crazy drivers from the Philly area of PA. At least I knew what the average driver would do and could be a defensive driver with that knowledge.

      After living in NJ, PA, NC, SC and FL (tourist areas of Orlando), I can say that FL was just horrible. After FL, I would rate SC drivers as second worse. Simply for the fact that changing lanes becomes a game of chess. Yeah, most SC drivers will get out of the way in the "fast lane" and let you pass. However, if you are not a driver that wants to go 20-30 MPH over the speed limit, well you are stuck with the MIDDLE LANE. That MIDDLE LANE sucks. After all you will need to get to the right lane at some point to get to your exit. That merging into the right lane has become my daily commutes worst nightmare.

      If there isn't much traffic, no biggie. However, even a little traffic and I have to start to defensively think about how I want to change lanes. I never move my head now, I just kinda pretend I am still looking forward while my eyes try to go as far right as they can. If I see an opening, bam, I merge like I am flying some T-Fighter or something. I get in the lane and I know the person behind me is pissed because I "got in from of them". Most SC drivers have the mentality of "get behind me biatch". Which doesn't work since every freaking driver in the lane you want to merge into is thinking the same thing and flooring the gas pedal and tailing really close to the person in front of them so you cannot get over. Oh, and I am not the typed of driver that waits until the last minute or so to merge into the lane I need to be in. I now merge over 5 - 10 miles before the exit I need just so I won't miss it. Sigh.

    36. Re:Notification for everything by wolrahnaes · · Score: 1, Offtopic

      +1 on that, I can't go 15 minutes on 71 or 271 without hitting a rolling roadblock of retards all driving exactly the same speed side by side.

      Here's a hint fucktards, if you're going to travel the same speed just get in line. Not only will you not be blocking those of us who want to travel faster, but you'll gain some aerodynamic advantages and get a bit better mileage.

      If there's no one in front of you and the person behind you is coming up fast, move the hell over.

      How I wish "Drive Right" was the law in the US like it is in Germany. I'd love to see left lane blockers get some hefty tickets. Then again it would probably go just as unenforced as minimum speed laws. Going after me doing 75 MPH is just so much easier politically than ticketing grandma for piloting her Grand Marquis at 43 MPH in the fast lane.

      --
      I used to get high on life, but I developed a tolerance. Now I need something stronger.
    37. Re:Notification for everything by BenEnglishAtHome · · Score: 4, Insightful

      Please stop talking about things you obviously haven't thought through and don't understand.

      If I pass then move over after just two car lengths, I've pretty much demonstrated the classic definition of cutting someone off. The only result is that they are then caused to either tailgate me or unexpectedly slow down, potentially causing a problem for the person behind them. Just because the guy flying up my butt is anxious is no reason for me to be a dick. His tailgating means we have two cars in an unsafe relationship and if we have a wreck we can at least have a hope of confining it to one lane. But if I try to get out of Mr. Speedracer's way by cutting off the guy in the lane next to me, we now have two unsafe maneuvers happening at the same time instead of one and I've involved another car and another lane in our potential accident. Bad news. Just because the guy behind me is stupid doesn't mean I want to join him in endangering my fellow motorists.

      When I pass, I wait until I can see both headlights of the car I passed in my rearview mirror. Then I signal and move over. Anyone who thinks I wait too long to move over or who, worse, tries to shoot through the gap between us is an incompetent menace.

    38. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      California doesn't say you have to move over. Besides if you are doing 80 and 85% of the traffic is doing 75 and the other 14% is at 55-69 you are the idiot not the people who won't move over. You are far more likely to cause an accident by being an over the top speeder than you would be if you'd just go with the flow. Most times I can set my cruise on "we are smart enough to use cruise right?" 75 and I rarely have to move and I tend to pass most of the cars in the left lane. I typically drive 8 to 4 lane highways.

      It's not a race, half the time some dumbass passes me I sit next to him/her at the off ramp light.. so what did he/her gain? You win.. one car length you are real special :-]

      Don't get me started on the folks in the fast lane who can't talk on their phone and drive at the same time. I see almost no one using bluetooth here yet it's the Law. These same people have no idea what cruise control is. As their speed fluctuates constantly.

    39. Re:Notification for everything by splorp! · · Score: 1

      Having driven from central Ohio to southern California, southern Vermont to central Ohio, central Ohio to Connecticut, Connecticut to southern Vermont and central Ohio to Cocoa Beach, Florida... I can honestly say the worst drivers in the country are in California. Connecticut was scary (bumper-to-bumper at 85mph), but Californians are just idiots. It gets worse with moisture. Hell, spit in the road and they panic.

      --
      Please don't humanize the morons around me. It makes me very uncomfortable.
    40. Re:Notification for everything by tabrisnet · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Has anyone considered the old rule (that almost everyone ignores, but the cops tend to remember) of 1 car-length per 10 miles per hour? So if you're going 65 and you have 2 car-lengths until the next car, YOU'RE TOO CLOSE.

    41. Re:Notification for everything by tompaulco · · Score: 1

      If someone else can zip around you, you had plenty of space to safely move to the right.
      Wrong. It is safe to pull over when you have established a 2 second buffer between you and the person in the right lane. Not 2 car lengths. At highways speeds, you need almost 200 feet, or about 15 car lengths.
      Two car lengths is acceptable if you are going about 10 MPH.
      Hitting your blinker helps to let people know that you are planning on getting back over, but too often people will just zoom on by on the right without signaling even when I am signaling.

      --
      If you are not allowed to question your government then the government has answered your question.
    42. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      California doesn't say you have to move over.

      And right there you see the attitude problem.

      1) it is polite to get out of someone's way (and polite of them not to expect extreme effort out of you to do so)

      2) it is safer to get out of someone's way than to have them crawling up your rear.

    43. Re:Notification for everything by Bartab · · Score: 1

      I prefer to straddle the line on the two leftmost lanes. As an added benefit, here in California, such an action also blocks motorcycles.

      --
      Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from a rigged demo.
    44. Re:Notification for everything by TechForensics · · Score: 1

      Too bad it doesn't have enough resolution to show a Homer Simpson-like figure mooning. This jape was played on me in traffic once (by means of a remote-activated doll in the rear window) and I laughed so hard I almost had a wreck. I gave the guy a thumbs up and he got a good laugh too.

      Hmmm.. maybe *any* signaling of other motorists in traffic might be a bad idea, come to think of it...

      --
      Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others.
    45. Re:Notification for everything by AvitarX · · Score: 1

      I remember thinking how I missed the crazy drivers from the Philly area of PA

      Is that stop in the middle of the road and visit their friend, even if there is a parking spot?

      Even if they blocked an empty spot, for the sake of stopping in the middle of the road?

      I lived in Philly for 3 years, and they are the worse city drivers I've had the privilege to drive with, but the stopping in the middle of narrow streets to run into a friends house is the most annoying part of what they do (though once I got over parking people in like that, it was kind of freeing).

      --
      Wow, sent an e-mail as suggested when clicking on "use classic" banner, and got a fast response that addressed my msg
    46. Re:Notification for everything by ThanatosMinor · · Score: 2, Insightful

      What you're suggesting is just duplicating the average bumper sticker. What a waste of a something that can generate dynamic messages.

      How about something like:
      "It's raining and I can barely see you. Turn your lights on."
      "You are obviously drunk. Please pull over and take a nap before you kill someone."

    47. Re:Notification for everything by weirdcrashingnoises · · Score: 5, Funny

      looks more like zoidberg with a paper hat, which is of course ridiculous, because he would have eaten it.

      --
      sigs... don't talk to me about sigs....
    48. Re:Notification for everything by sjames · · Score: 1

      Yes, TWO car lengths is plenty to move back to the right. He's talking about those asses who ride up on your bumper, narrowly miss the bumper of the car you're passing (because there is just a touch over ONE car length of space) in order to move to the right, then give you the finger as they floor it past you. All while you were signaling a move to the right.

    49. Re:Notification for everything by cayenne8 · · Score: 2, Insightful
      Not only that..but, the cops seem to look more to the passing lanes for speeders.

      I go fast...I try to stay in the right lane as much as I can...only getting to the left to pass people, and then back to the right lane.

      If someone wants to go faster than me (not that often)...more power to them, they'll hit the speed traps ahead of me....

      --
      Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.........
    50. Re:Notification for everything by Lost+Race · · Score: 1

      Colorado is the most awesomest. People pull over to let you by on 2-lane mountain roads, even when you're the only vehicle behind them and they're doing the speed limit. You don't even have to tailgate. Just come up on them fast and they actually notice it in their rearviews. Wow.

    51. Re:Notification for everything by DavidApi · · Score: 1

      If I passed you on the right, you are in the RIGHT lane. Hint - some countries drive on the Left Hand Side. :-)

    52. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Why not just convert to the British system where passing on the right is the norm? All your problems will be solved then.

    53. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      It's a safety measure so you don't hit an unexpected Amish buggy.

    54. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      If you signal, and wait, and move in when the guy to your right and behind you backs off, you can then move over safely. And the guy behind you can see you are trying to move out of his way, and will be less of a jerk about making a point by riding your ass.

      But if you wait, and don't signal, then you create an ambiguous situation where jackasses may or may not try to shoot the gap.

      People that wait till they are turning the wheel to change lanes, before signaling make me laugh. Although I do understand the tendency of people moving up and trying to block the lane-change, but regardless, showing what you plan to do well before doing it saves everyone a headache.

    55. Re:Notification for everything by clone53421 · · Score: 2, Insightful

      That's a stupid rule. You don't have to stop in the distance between you and the car ahead of you. You have to stop in the distance between you plus the distance it takes him to stop. Unless he runs into a concrete wall or a semi coming the opposite way, he isn't going to stop dead, and you don't have to either.

      If you're gaining on him, yeah, back off, but if you're able to stop quicker than he is, you still won't hit him.

      Another thing: A car length is a lot shorter than you think. People tend to underestimate horizontal distances... for example, did you realise that sidewalks are generally 4-6 feet wide? What you think is a car length is probably at least 1½ if not 2 lengths.

      Finally, yes, 2 car lengths is too short at 65 miles per hour. However, if there's no reason to expect a sudden stop, 4 car lengths is probably ok.

      --
      Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
    56. Re:Notification for everything by thousandinone · · Score: 2

      If I pass then move over after just two car lengths, I've pretty much demonstrated the classic definition of cutting someone off. The only result is that they are then caused to either tailgate me or unexpectedly slow down, potentially causing a problem for the person behind them.

      I'm not sure what reasons you may have for passing someone, but generally when I pass someone, it is because they are traveling at a lower speed than I would prefer. In passing them, I have already accelerated to a higher speed than they are traveling. When I merge back over, I am still moving faster than they are- because of this, there is no reason for them to unexpectedly slow down.

      The only way I can see this becoming an issue is if you're accelerating to pass somebody, then slowing down to the same or a slower speed than that person is traveling. If that's the case, you're just being an asshole.

    57. Re:Notification for everything by clone53421 · · Score: 1

      If I pass then move over after just two car lengths, I've pretty much demonstrated the classic definition of cutting someone off.

      Wrong. You've completed a pass. If the person you're passing has to slow down, you're cutting them off, but if you're moving faster than they are, they don't need to slow down.

      In other words, if you're passing someone, SPEED UP, PASS THEM, and GET OVER. Then you can slow down, once you have enough space. Whatever you do, don't slow down before you get over. As long as you're moving faster than the car you're pulling ahead of, it is physically impossible for him to rear-end you.

      --
      Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
    58. Re:Notification for everything by fyngyrz · · Score: 4, Insightful

      This rule will not allow sufficient traffic to move at posted speeds with the number of lanes available in most US highway configurations. So while the rule is a great guide for safety purposes, it is effectively useless in or near a city, because no one wants to spend extra hours on the road on the one hand, and the government won't allow high enough speeds to make those spacings practical for the vehicle density that is a modern fact of life.

      And this, by the way, is one of the reasons I live and work in rural Montana.

      Most US highway designs are so bad - insufficient to the task of safe and timely travel - that the only hope we really have is over-the-horizon technological. Car to car radar and status; automated response to same; deep infrared (heat) sensors; vastly improved light rail; isolation of travel corridors from debris, wildlife and pedestrians; the vague and unlikely hope that inexpensive flying capability will decongest the ground paths (and recover immense amounts of real estate.)

      I've always thought that a truly advanced society would at least master how to contain and conserve light gases and go for personal airship transport, with elevated setups such as monorails for mass and heavy transit. Roads are such a waste of land, such a risk to wildlife, such resource- and maintainance-hogs...

      But then again, we're still using and wasting power with streetlights long after they became obsolete. That whole advanced society thing... not us.

      --
      I've fallen off your lawn, and I can't get up.
    59. Re:Notification for everything by clone53421 · · Score: 1

      I don't need 2 seconds to react to someone stopping in front of me, and I doubt you do either. Furthermore, I have just as long as the person in front does to stop – in fact, longer, because I also have the space between me and them.

      --
      Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
    60. Re:Notification for everything by clone53421 · · Score: 1

      Hmm, well, if you've got an idiot like that behind you, I suggest you give it some gas and assume no cop is going to happen to pull you over right then. You can always slow down again once he's passed you.

      --
      Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
    61. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0
      if you were just going to kill yourself, i'd say go speedracer, go

      however, since you're likely to kill yourself and take one or more with you, i'll suggest you read some of these other fine rebuttals and _think_ about what you're doing

      and, oh yeah, get the hell off the freeway, dumbass

    62. Re:Notification for everything by RulesLawyer · · Score: 1

      But two seconds are nice to have to dodge roadway debris, which you didn't see coming until the person in front of you dodged it.

    63. Re:Notification for everything by AceofSpades19 · · Score: 4, Insightful

      Have you watched fox news lately?, I think they are more closely related then they apear

    64. Re:Notification for everything by samkass · · Score: 1

      I was curious about your assertion, so I (gasp!) looked it up. From the best sources I can find, if you're expecting to have to stop the average person's reaction time (including visual, decision-making, and movement to brake) is about 0.7 seconds. Unexpected but with some lighted indicator (brake lights up ahead) is about 1.25 seconds. Surprise stopping is about 1.5 seconds. That's after the signal from the driver in from of you reaches his brake lights and the lights' filament heats up enough to glow (assuming incancesdents).

      So using a 2 second rule seems pretty reasonable for your average safe driving. If you decide to cut below it you may be right that you can handle it, but it will be harder to make a case if something goes wrong.

      --
      E pluribus unum
    65. Re:Notification for everything by clone53421 · · Score: 1

      I've been driving for nearly a decade and I haven't killed myself nor anyone else, thanks very much. If you're the moron who's always in front of me taking 30 seconds to pass somebody and plugging up the left lane, YOU get off the freeway. You're not doing anyone else a favour.

      Oh, and FWIW, I don't normally speed, and I rarely go more than 5 over. (Truthfully.) However, the people who take 30 seconds to pass or drive 20 MPH on the freeway because it snowed half an inch are morons.

      --
      Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
    66. Re:Notification for everything by clone53421 · · Score: 0, Flamebait

      Two points.

      #1: I'm not average. "Average driver" includes 85-year-old grandmas. You think the figure is skewed? Maybe.

      #2: Unexpected stops are very rare.

      --
      Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
    67. Re:Notification for everything by borizz · · Score: 1

      Yes, you're not average. There was a study conducted in the Netherlands. When asked, 85% of drivers said they were better drivers than the average on the road. The problem is that people tend to keep their behavior, even when it is not appropriate. Say you're actually a very good driver, above the 90th percentile. You can safely follow a car at about a second's distance. You're having a bad day, didn't sleep so well. You still follow that one second, but your reaction time has slowed to 1,5 seconds. The very rare unexpected stop happens and you ram into something.

      That's, in my opinion, the problem with following less than 2 seconds. And, is it really going to make a difference big enough worth risking your and other road users life for?

    68. Re:Notification for everything by Skater · · Score: 1

      I take it you're one of the people that cuts over in front of me with about 8 inches from my bumper to yours. You're going faster, so it's safe?

    69. Re:Notification for everything by couchslug · · Score: 1

      "If you're driving around where I live, people will actually mostly respect your turn signal. "

      If you drive where I live YMMV:

      Motorcycle = they don't see it
      Volkswagen Scirocco = they usually don't see it or see but don't care
      2000 F150 = they see it and defer appropriately
      1976 spray bomb camo F350 with flat black tow truck push bumper = they must love me because they leave me LOTS of room.

      --
      "This post is an artistic work of fiction and falsehood. Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact."
    70. Re:Notification for everything by thegnu · · Score: 1

      I don't need 2 seconds to react to someone stopping in front of me, and I doubt you do either. Furthermore, I have just as long as the person in front does to stop – in fact, longer, because I also have the space between me and them.

      Yes, and all of our grandmothers suck at driving, and they probably don't pay attention. I would advise you to give a person 2 seconds unless you know them personally.

      --
      Please stop stalking me, bro.
    71. Re:Notification for everything by clone53421 · · Score: 1

      The thing is, I'm not just watching the car in front of me. I'm watching conditions in front of him. If he's about to stop, I'll know ahead of time.

      If it's a semi and I can't see around or there's some other reason that the traffic isn't predictable, then I won't follow that closely, but under normal conditions people don't stop on the freeway.

      --
      Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
    72. Re:Notification for everything by mortonda · · Score: 1

      When I pass, I wait until I can see both headlights of the car I passed in my rearview mirror. Then I signal and move over. Anyone who thinks I wait too long to move over or who, worse, tries to shoot through the gap between us is an incompetent menace.

      Thank you, I'm not alone!!!! This is what is taught in drivers ed, and it just makes good sense. The tailgating jerks can just wait, they aren't really going to get there much faster anyway.

    73. Re:Notification for everything by clone53421 · · Score: 1

      No, I'm not one of those people, but if you have 2 or 3 car lengths and you're traveling scarcely any faster than the person you're supposedly passing, I'll go around. 8 inches, no, but a car length is enough.

      --
      Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
    74. Re:Notification for everything by ObjetDart · · Score: 3, Insightful

      In the immortal words of George Carlin... have you ever noticed that anyone driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone driving faster than you is a MANIAC!

      --
      I read Usenet for the articles.
    75. Re:Notification for everything by 6Yankee · · Score: 2, Interesting

      The one you hear in the UK is the "two-second rule" - leave two seconds' gap between you and the car in front. As the guy in front passes something - lamp-post, pothole, cats-eye, whatever, say out loud, "Only a fool breaks the two-second rule." It takes about two seconds. If you're still saying that when you get to the object, you're too close. Double it for wet conditions.

      The nice thing about that is, it scales with the speed.

    76. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      Just because the guy flying up my butt is anxious is no reason for me to be a dick.

      You're doing it wrong.

    77. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I take it that you're one of those failed parade marshals trying to relive their broken dreams by having a mile long string of cars trailing as you self righteously impose yourself on everyone with the misfortune of having to travel in the same direction at the same time as you.

    78. Re:Notification for everything by ZygnuX · · Score: 1

      And Obama isn't anywhere near to the left.

    79. Re:Notification for everything by okmijnuhb · · Score: 1

      Um, hello, if "dumbass" could be patient, he wouldn't be traveling at 87 mph in the fast lane, right? In fact 87 mph probably feels far to slow for him to begin with, without a putz in front of him slowing him down.

    80. Re:Notification for everything by atraintocry · · Score: 1

      I think his problem was thinking TV == reality.

    81. Re:Notification for everything by gd2shoe · · Score: 1

      My town (northern CA) has a number of short on-ramps. People avoid the right lane because they don't want to try to merge with Grandma going 45. (or worse, 6-8 cars in a row packed together as if they were glued.)

      --
      I won't join Slashcott. OTOH, If Beta goes live, I just won't be back until it's fixed. Sorry Dice.
    82. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      you're only cutting someone off if you're driving slower than them

    83. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Amen. I can't stand that.

    84. Re:Notification for everything by borizz · · Score: 1

      Of course you don't. Good drivers look ahead and anticipate (and I'm certainly not saying you're a bad driver, I don't know how you drive; you might be the safest person on the road).

      The point is that fatigue, medicine and other stuff might slow your perception, reaction time and degrade your judgment of what's safe. That's OK when it's not too big of an impairment and you are aware of the reduction in skills and drive appropriately. The problem appears when you don't know about the impairment (and thus behave like you were in fit condition).

      A lot of things can slow you down. Onset of flu, sudden urge sneeze because you have a cold, headache you thought you had under control with paracetamol, fatigue, sudden speck of dirt in your eyes, wasp in the car, phone ringing. The list goes on, with things you can know ahead of time and things you just can not anticipate for, except by taking more distance to the car in front of you.

      Last paragraph: Consider this. Would you want a person (any person, including a 85-year old granny or a I-just-got-my-license-2-hours-ago kid) following you at one second? If not, why not? Now apply the same logic to the person in the car in front of you. That is all, thank you.

    85. Re:Notification for everything by gd2shoe · · Score: 1

      Ditto, and please ignore the incompetent and dangerous drivers replying to you.

      A word of advice, previously mentioned: signal before you finish passing. If they still choose to ignore you, they deserve to be run off the road. (not that you should try)

      --
      I won't join Slashcott. OTOH, If Beta goes live, I just won't be back until it's fixed. Sorry Dice.
    86. Re:Notification for everything by reallyjoel · · Score: 1

      indeed

    87. Re:Notification for everything by gd2shoe · · Score: 1

      Unexpected stops are very rare.

      That's why your premiums will end up higher than his. "Unexpected" will happen to you periodically (just very infrequently).

      --
      I won't join Slashcott. OTOH, If Beta goes live, I just won't be back until it's fixed. Sorry Dice.
    88. Re:Notification for everything by gd2shoe · · Score: 1

      You drive a tall vehicle (SUV, etc) don't you? I can do that when driving my Mom's van, but I cannot consistently when driving my car (unless the road winds a lot).

      If everyone drove the same sized car, you would need to be able to see through the windows and windshield of the car in front of you reasonably well. You still wouldn't know what was on the road in front of him unless his car and interior are acrylic.

      --
      I won't join Slashcott. OTOH, If Beta goes live, I just won't be back until it's fixed. Sorry Dice.
    89. Re:Notification for everything by SleptThroughClass · · Score: 1

      What does the second "T" stand for?

      Truth, justice, and the American way of using USB gadgets!

    90. Re:Notification for everything by Skater · · Score: 1

      I'd love a car length and I thank you for doing that. Unfortunately many people in DC are idiots. My rule of thumb is to wait until I see the headlights in the mirror (about a car length ahead) and then smoothly merge in.

    91. Re:Notification for everything by Skater · · Score: 0, Flamebait

      I take it you're one of those trolls I've heard so much about. If this was a real response, see my other reply in this thread.

    92. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Your whole attitude is based on a misplaced territoriality towards the space around your car. Your argument can be summed up as 'You better respect what ever it is I want while I disregard what you want.'. Your idea that its perfectly alright to drive as you please while others must obey your rules is the essence of whats wrong with drivers thinking and the cause of much friction in traffic. Traffic needs to flow and obstructing it negatively effects everyone around you no matter how good your reasons make you feel. If you could bring it upon yourself to stay out of everyone's way, the world would be all the better for it. Life would be so much better if your first concern wasn't what you want. It won't harm you to anticipate a car approaching and moving over in advance of their arrival, even if, god forbid, you must alter your speed to clear the path. I know how onerous being considerate can be, but won't you just try?

    93. Re:Notification for everything by Cajun+Hell · · Score: 1

      Wrong. You've completed a pass. .. if you're moving faster than they are, they don't need to slow down.

      Bzzt. You have neglected safety margins. Some people use the one-car-length-per-10mph rule, some people use the (superior IMHO) 2-seconds rule. Whatever. If you're going 70 MPH and pass someone who is going 60 MPH, and you pull in front of someone by two car lengths, then yes, you are not presently on a collision course with them.

      So everything's ok, right?

      But there's still a problem, and it's one you have created: your car and the car you just passed, are too close together for his 60MPH speed. Suppose, right after the pass, a deer suddenly jumps from the trees beside the road in front of your car, or an idiot in the right lane decides to move into your lane. You hit your breaks, and the guy you just passed is going to hit you. You fucked up the safety margin, and the only way the guy you just passed can clear himself of "wrongdoing' (hitting someone from behind) in the event a collision happens, is if he slams on his brakes, and waits until your faster speed creates enough buffer zone between you and him, before he can resume his old (slower than you!) speed.

      Congratulations. By passing someone and then cutting them off instead of getting further ahead, you just ruined someone's day -- they either have to brake (aggravating) or be at fault in the unlikely event that you suddenly hit your brakes. Either way, he loses, because you couldn't be bothered to think about what's happening from someone else's point of view. That makes you an inconsiderate asshole.

      --
      "Believe me!" -- Donald Trump
    94. Re:Notification for everything by gd2shoe · · Score: 1

      Have you watched fox news lately?, I think they are more closely related then they apear

      And again, I quote "far-stupid != far-right". Fox is much further right than the other major US networks, but it is not far-right.

      --
      I won't join Slashcott. OTOH, If Beta goes live, I just won't be back until it's fixed. Sorry Dice.
    95. Re:Notification for everything by Cajun+Hell · · Score: 1

      I don't need 2 seconds to react to someone stopping in front of me

      But we're not talking about you. We're talking about the car behind you, that you just passed and is going to collide with you if you suddenly slow down. How much time does granny need? I don't know. Do you? 2 seconds is the standard, but ok, fine, cut her off and bet your life on her reflexes. I'll think of it as evolution in action.

      If granny knows .5 seconds isn't enough, though, and has to slow down to get her 2 second buffer back, then granny is going to have a bad day. But that's not your problem, I guess. When someone cuts you off by violating whatever following rule you use (apparently it's a lot less than 2 seconds), I guess it won't be their problem, either. Have a nice day.

      --
      "Believe me!" -- Donald Trump
    96. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      It might not be safe, but it sure the hell isn't "cutting you off".

    97. Re:Notification for everything by clone53421 · · Score: 1

      Minivan, yes, but even behind tall vehicles I can see through the vehicle if their windows aren't tinted too much.

      --
      Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
    98. Re:Notification for everything by clone53421 · · Score: 1

      I've been driving for nearly a decade. Although "unexpected" does happen, you're almost always aware of the possibility by the time it happens so even then it's not entirely unexpected. Or maybe that's just my experience.

      --
      Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
    99. Re:Notification for everything by clone53421 · · Score: 1

      I live in the Midwest and admittedly it's nowhere near as bad as you folk out East have it. (I've driven in VA, and yeah, it's crazy.) I consider myself to be a good driver... well, there was this one time when I forgot to check my blind spot, but other than that.

      --
      Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
    100. Re:Notification for everything by clone53421 · · Score: 1

      Suppose, right after the pass, a deer suddenly jumps from the trees beside the road in front of your car, or an idiot in the right lane decides to move into your lane.

      Both of those are foreseeable possibilities based on conditions. Bad conditions obviously mean you need to be more careful.

      You hit your breaks, and the guy you just passed is going to hit you.

      He has just as long to brake as I have, actually, if he's paying attention.

      the only way the guy you just passed can clear himself of "wrongdoing' (hitting someone from behind) in the event a collision happens, is if he slams on his brakes

      I wouldn't have cut in front so close if I thought there was a possibility I'd have to slow down (slower idiot cutting in front of me or deer, as you suggested). He doesn't have to slow down – by the time I finish merging right, he'll have a car length or two, and as I'm already going faster than him he'll have more momentarily.

      --
      Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
    101. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      They aren't tailgating, they're huddling to stay warm.

    102. Re:Notification for everything by jabithew · · Score: 1

      The United Kingdom has universal healthcare and we're not your model far left nation either. Ask the French.

      --
      All intents and purposes. Not intensive purposes.
    103. Re:Notification for everything by Animaether · · Score: 1

      Both of those are foreseeable possibilities based on conditions.

      It's the conditions you can't foresee that I'd worry about.

      He has just as long to brake as I have, actually, if he's paying attention.

      Minus, of course, any response time and not taking into account braking characteristics of the two cars and so forth and so on.

      I wouldn't have cut in front so close if I thought there was a possibility I'd have to slow down

      Here's the thing - you should always think that there is that possibility. I thought they taught as much in driving school (mom&dad-taught kids notwithstanding - I'd sure hope they get told the same thing).

    104. Re:Notification for everything by BenEnglishAtHome · · Score: 0, Offtopic

      A word of advice, previously mentioned: signal before you finish passing.

      Actually, I do. I tend to turn on the signal about halfway between the time I move past the car on my right and the time I anticipate moving over. Unfortunately, that means there's usually about a car length plus a foot or two between my rear bumper and the front bumper of the car to my right. That's about the time that boy speed racer hits the gas, closes to within six inches of my rear bumper, and jerks to the right.

      There's just no winning. A little thought toward helping *everyone* maintain a safe cushion around their vehicle is pooh-poohed by the jerks on the road. And there seems to be an endless supply of jerks.

    105. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      George Bush is NOT on the far right, at least not what the far right used to be. He's invented a whole new category, and moved a bunch of people from the right into that.

      Indeed, it's best viewed two-dimensionally. Have you seen the political compass? If not, you should (after taking the test for yourself) look on the /analysis2 page for where they place Bush and the /usprimaries2008 for where they place Obama.

      I can't speak to the claim about Obama, I don't know the subtle nuances of the factions on the left. I can say he's against gay marriage, and his health care plan is only about 10% of what a real universal health care plan would be.

      For the record, Barack Obama opposed Proposition 8. IIRC he said something to the effect of "I personally believe marriage is between a man and a woman but recognize that it would have been illegal for my mother and father to marry only a decade before and do not support Proposition 8". The "yes on 8" crowd quoted only the first part of his statement and implied something he didn't say.

    106. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      The rule, at any speed, is to keep 3 seconds of gap between your car and the car in front of you.

    107. Re:Notification for everything by BenEnglishAtHome · · Score: 1

      You are one of those idiots that rides the speed limit in the left lane on a wide open highway aren't you?

      Absolutely never when conditions permit.

      Unfortunately, my high-speed driving is on freeways in Houston where the early morning commute on Beltway 8 is at near-max capacity (all lanes must be in use) with packs of cars going 70-80mph, generally just one car length apart. That environment seems to breed an endless supply of folks who think that any vehicle moving less than 10 miles over the limit is just another cone on an autocross course, to be flown by at the closest possible distance.

      True story: A couple of months ago, I was doing 70 in the left lane. A car comes flying up behind me so I increase speed a bit and look for a gap I can move into to my right. The dude behind me is so incensed that someone has the audacity to not ram his way into an unsafe gap to the right just to get out of his way, he pulls to the *left* and passes me on the shoulder. He uses the debris-littered, narrow, bumpy shoulder to hit about 90 mph.

      With idiots like that running around, forgive me if I just decide to revert back to doing it the way they taught me in driver's ed 35 years ago. My attitude is less charitable than it used to be. I simply can't justify forcing myself to drive like a dangerous idiot just to keep from pissing off someone who thinks the rules of the road should apply to everyone *except* them.

    108. Re:Notification for everything by BenEnglishAtHome · · Score: 1

      As some of the other posters have pointed out, it's a good idea to turn on your signal a bit earlier than when you know you can move over.

      In practice, I think that's the best compromise, though I tend to wait until I've gone far enough ahead that I think I'm actually going to be able to move to the right. You never know when the guy to your right is going to turn out to be one of those jerks who accelerates to prevent you from coming over. That's happened to me plenty of times.

      The old driver's ed way would have us wait even later but if you do that, BoySpeedRacer is going to try to slalom through the gap behind you.

      There's no good solution except for the guy behind to stop tailgating; we know that'll never happen.

    109. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      But then again, we're still using and wasting power with streetlights long after they became obsolete.

      Yeah, I really hate seeing further down the road than my headlights illuminate. All those people walking and garbage cans knocked over by the wind just make driving more exciting if you don't see them coming.

      Also, when I'm walking at night, I really hate seeing at all.

    110. Re:Notification for everything by gnasher719 · · Score: 1

      So using a 2 second rule seems pretty reasonable for your average safe driving. If you decide to cut below it you may be right that you can handle it, but it will be harder to make a case if something goes wrong.

      The actual problem is that if your distance is less than two seconds, you have to brake a bit harder than the car in front of you. And if the guy behind you follows at less than 2 seconds distance, then he has to brake a bit harder again, and so has the next guy, and so on. So if there is a sequence of drivers driving too close, and the first one brakes, it may be the tenth or so who is in serious trouble.

      Regarding the idiots who try to pass you on the wrong lane just after you have overtaken another vehicle: My first goal when driving is trying to survive. When I have someone right on my ass, I expect them to behave stupid. That means for example that after overtaking and indicating that I am changing lanes again, I will not change lanes immediately because that risks a collision with an idiot who decided just at that point in time to change lanes and accelerate like mad; instead I will wait until I am confident they will not be changing lanes. I also will change lanes slower than I would normally. Idiots following too close actually force me to drive in a way that costs them more time.

      It also happens that people drive much too close to the next vehicle when they want to overtake and there is oncoming traffic. They don't realise that they make it actually harder for themselves to overtake. If you drive at a reasonable distance, you can accellerate when you notice a gap in the oncoming gap approaching, and when you move to the other lane to overtake, you already go at a higher speed than the car you are overtaking. If you follow too close, you can't do that. So when you move to the other lane, you are initially at the same speed as the car you are overtaking, so you need a much bigger gap to overtake.

    111. Re:Notification for everything by freeweed · · Score: 1

      but if you're able to stop quicker than he is, you still won't hit him.

      You cannot ever, Ever, EVER predict this will any accuracy. Claiming otherwise is a good indication of just how poor a driver you are. Short of doing a full engineering analysis on the difference between vehicles, your respective brake and tire life, and a host of other factors you cannot possibly predict, you can and often will be wrong.

      Always drive as though the car in front of you can stop on a dime. Those who do not are those who end up in multi-car pileups.

      Hint: it's entirely possible for the car in front of you to hit an immovable object.

      --
      Endless arguments over trivial contradictions in books written by ignorant savages to explain thunder in the dark.
    112. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      What are you driving, a moped? Follow BCP, rule-of-thumb, read your driving manual, skip with the drama queen posts.

      As soon as you can see the car in your rear view mirror you are safe to merge right. Period. It's in the fine manual, and empirically it works perfectly.

    113. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      A quick lesson: The turn signal indicates my intention to maneuver.

      My dad used to talk about good driving habits and such when I was in the car with him when I was youger. He would frequently ask me "Son, what does it mean if someone has their blinker on?"

      The correct answer, verified many times over in my ten years of driving experience, was "Their blinker works."

    114. Re:Notification for everything by The+AtomicPunk · · Score: 3, Insightful

      Neither one of them are going to do anything to enhance my freedom, or let me keep more of my earnings. Where does that put them, authoritarian?

      I recall reading in history books about when "liberals" were people that didn't trust or like government. Who usurped our word?

    115. Re:Notification for everything by fractoid · · Score: 1

      This is the one I would use the most. Apparently Ohioans don't understand the term "passing lane".

      You should try driving in Perth, Australia. Here we went the opposite way and just never made it illegal to pass in the left lane (right lane for you chaps). Add that to the fact that a generation of "if you drive 5km/h slower you're SAFE" brainwashing and you get a checkerboard of cars going down a 100km/h stretch of freeway at 80km/h. If they're spaced just right you can set up a continuous weave through traffic that lasts kilometers. ;)

      --
      Rampant carbon sequestration destroyed the Dinosaurs' tropical paradise. I'm here to help repair the damage.
    116. Re:Notification for everything by xenocide2 · · Score: 0, Flamebait

      Ok. So federal relief to faith-based service organizations, private meetings with energy executives, government owned banks and industry, withdrawing from the Anti-Ballistic Missile defense, warrantless wiretapping, executive wartime powers extending to the VP and preemptive war and torture aren't far right?

      The list above is so damn long I can forgive you for having amnesia. They are not mere policies of stupid; they're borderline fascist.

      --
      I Browse at +4 Flamebait

      Open Source Sysadmin

    117. Re:Notification for everything by regular_gonzalez · · Score: 1

      I've found the best solution to this is to have a car with a 9k redline. Get close up behind the person going too slow in the passing lane, drop it into 3rd gear so your engine jumps to 8000 RPM and sounds like a demon banshee from hell, and watch as they immediately try to get out of your way. Works like a charm.

      --
      Due to circumstances beyond my control, I am master of my fate and captain of my soul.
    118. Re:Notification for everything by lgw · · Score: 0, Offtopic

      Not where *I* am in Cali, where the motorcycles seem to go between any lanes they please. You might try weaving between the left 3 lanes for maximum effect - though you'd still fit right in around here.

      --
      Socialism: a lie told by totalitarians and believed by fools.
    119. Re:Notification for everything by JimBobJoe · · Score: 0

      Apparently Ohioans don't understand the term "passing lane".

      We don't. I've got theories but at some point in time the go left pass right thing just got deleted from our driving culture.

      It's come to the point that I only pass on the left when I have to. I feel safer passing on the right...probably because I feel I'm less likely to be seen by highway patrol passing on the right than the left.

    120. Re:Notification for everything by lgw · · Score: 0

      If they were fascist, you'd be in jail now, watching your family get tortured to death.

      If they were far right, they wouldn't be spending money at record speeds, and there *certainly* wouldn't be government-owned banks. What bizarro-world do you live on where socialism is "the right"? This bailout is already lining up to cost more than all of America's wars in history. The right hopes that McCain's defeat will remind the Republican party that they're not supposed to support that kind of thing.

      I bet you predicted that Bush wouldn't give up power peacefully, that democracy in Iraq would be a miserable failure, and that Obama would bring significant change to government, not stuff his cabinet with Clinton retreads. I bet you consider the New York Times a reputable source, and are shocked it's going under.

      --
      Socialism: a lie told by totalitarians and believed by fools.
    121. Re:Notification for everything by clone53421 · · Score: 0, Offtopic

      Always drive as though the car in front of you can stop on a dime. Those who do not are those who end up in multi-car pileups.

      Hint: it's entirely possible for the car in front of you to hit an immovable object.

      Yes, it's possible – under certain circumstances. As I'll be able to see what's coming, this shouldn't be a problem.

      --
      Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
    122. Re:Notification for everything by fyngyrz · · Score: 0, Offtopic

      All those people walking and garbage cans knocked over by the wind just make driving more exciting if you don't see them coming.

      You're in the habit of over-driving your headlights in an area that features people and garbage cans as driving hazards? Forgive me if I only wish for a police officer to catch you.

      Also, when I'm walking at night, I really hate seeing at all.

      Flashlight. Modern invention. Look into it. Has the benefit of actually illuminating where you're walking, without wasting hundreds of watts of energy; serves as a bludgeon and a blinding tool against assailants in a pinch; can be directed into dark corners streetlights miss; they can be used as a help beacon; they can carry a siren; they make everywhere accessible instead of just little pools of light in town; etc.

      --
      I've fallen off your lawn, and I can't get up.
    123. Re:Notification for everything by megawump · · Score: 0, Offtopic

      Actually, because of the way traffic spaces itself at higher speeds, more cars can travel more (total) miles in a given period at lower speeds...

    124. Re:Notification for everything by xenocide2 · · Score: 0, Offtopic

      Fascists only need to torture and jail and disappear people with politically damaging power. Like journalists who could reveal that the leaks you swore to find and punish came from your VP's chief of staff. Or, if I were as conspiratorially minded and leftist as you seem to think I am, the sysadmin who ran the email server and knows where all the missing mail went. I have no inside knowledge of the white house, or people following me ready to overthrow anything.

      Far-Right is an ambiguous term. It could mean small government, or an incredibly invasive one ready to form an ecclesiastical state. Or it could mean an ultra nationalistic militant one. I don't know which one any given poster means, but I do know that W has tried very hard to prove he does not like the left. So much so, that you can probably pick any one meaning for "far-right" and a passable response could be crafted to demonstrate how the Bush administration was "far-right".

      --
      I Browse at +4 Flamebait

      Open Source Sysadmin

    125. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      First you write this:

      Ok. So federal relief to faith-based service organizations, private meetings with energy executives, government owned banks and industry, withdrawing from the Anti-Ballistic Missile defense, warrantless wiretapping, executive wartime powers extending to the VP and preemptive war and torture aren't far right?

      Then

      Far-Right is an ambiguous term.

      Do you KNOW and COMPREHEND what a fucking moron you are? If you have to learn the terms during a conversation, then you were woefully unprepared. Disconnect from the net, go to the library, and read. GGGGGGGGP post made a perfectly reasonable assertion: GWB does not represent either extreme of the traditional idealogies. Populists are not idealists (typically).

    126. Re:Notification for everything by Kent+Recal · · Score: 1

      drive 20 MPH on the freeway because it snowed half an inch are morons.

      Welcome to my "famous last words" cookie jar.
      Some of those snails may in fact be smarter than you and live longer. The way you are talking indicates that you have probably never had to perform a full-brake on snow. I'd suggest you go and attend an advanced driving class someday, the only way to grasp these things is to actually do them once (not on a public street, please).

      The short version is: Your traction on snow, even "only half an inch", is unpredictable. 5 seconds ago you may have been driving on a fresh snow carpet with good traction but right now you're riding on an area that recently froze over. You never know, your car doesn't tell you and you only notice when you have to hit the brake - which is a tad bit too late.

      Trust me, the moment you hit the brake and realize it does nothing is a very sobering one. Expirience that once and you may understand the 20MPH guys a bit better in the future.

    127. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I had just put my turn signal on, you dumbass, and I was waiting for the lane to clear when you zipped over to pass me.

      How did he zip over and pass you in an uncleared lane? If he passed you, it was obviously clear enough. Pay more attention while driving, please.

    128. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      He was willing to accept a shorter gap, perhaps mere inches from someone else's bumper, or maybe even two someone elses. That's actually the where the dumbass bit comes in. It doesn't help that people in the lane you're trying to move to will themselves speed up when they see your signal, which only encourages "stealth" driving: announcing you intention only juuust before you execute or even a little after you begin to execute, so as not to give other drivers the chance to spoil things.

      Remember, when you change lanes, you want to be at least two seconds behind the driver in front of you. You also want to be at least two seconds ahead of the driver behind you.

      I will say this, though, I will, occasionally find myself in the passing lane, but going slower than the traffic behind me, due to my own wandering attention. My fault. Once a car or two starts lining up behind me, though, I usually get the message, but the weird thing is that they often don't do anything till I put my signal on, and THEN start passing on the right. What's up with that?

    129. Re:Notification for everything by mr_matticus · · Score: 1

      It's the conditions you can't foresee that I'd worry about.

      In which case it does not matter how close the cars are. When merging and passing, the rule of thumb cannot be mechanically maintained, and road conditions dictate how much shorter a temporary following distance may be.

      Most interruptions in the smooth flow of traffic are due to failure of "safety conscious" drivers to follow the basic protocol of multilane road systems: each progressive lane in the driver's-side direction should be moving faster than the preceding lane at all times. Problems arise when people block all lanes by completing a 1 mph-differential pass, which causes other drivers to stack up behind.

      More often than not, these idiots are the ones who pull out in front of an already passing driver on the left (with a mile of empty space behind), going slower than that driver instead of waiting for the faster car to pass on the left before engaging their slow-motion passing maneuver. These people see a reasonable distance at their slower speed and pull into the passing lane, without looking beyond the first pair of headlights in the mirror and without considering their relative slower speed or the overall flow of traffic.

      If there is enough room for another car to move from the left lane to the right lane and then back into the left lane, all while you putz about in the left lane (US), you have failed your roadway obligations not to be an obstruction to traffic, and as a result are creating a greater traffic hazard and risk to yourself and others than the risk mitigated by a steadfast following of a rule of thumb. If you have been passed, the two-second rule safe following distance automatically evens out over the course of a few seconds, because you should not be passing anyone unless you are traveling at an appreciably higher rate of speed. No brakes are needed, and if the following driver needs to make any small adjustment, it's simply by virtue of coasting.

      You should not be in the passing lane unless you are moving a solid 5 mph or more faster than the lane to the right. If you are uncomfortable with that speed increase, you should not be passing at all. You should also never force a univariate analysis using only a following distance rule and assume that you're being "safe" by blindly adhering to such a standard, or that other drivers are unsafe. There are tailgaters and unsafe speeders, but there are equally obnoxious and unsafe drivers who insist on lingering longer than necessary and slower than permissible.

      It's just like those people who put their turn signals on fifteen seconds in advance of a lane change. Preparation is good, but when following drivers slow down and give you space for five to ten seconds and nothing happens, other drivers begin to ignore what appear to be your mistaken blinkers. These people are as bad as those who don't signal at all, but they tend to be sanctimonious about their thoroughness and safety when in fact, their overlong signaling is a source of roadway confusion and elevated risk.

    130. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      "If I passed you on the right you are in the wrong fucking lane"

      I had just put my turn signal on, you dumbass, and I was waiting for the lane to clear when you zipped over to pass me. If you'd been the least bit patient, you wouldn't have had to slow down even.

      A quick lesson: The turn signal indicates my intention to maneuver. It is not an instruction for you to maneuver into the space that I've indicated my intention to occupy. Especially when I'm just trying to get out of your way.

      Don't know about where you live, but here (Australia) the indicator means "I am planning to move to the left/right", not "I'm changing lanes, better give me room".

      There is no obligatiuon / law that says you have to allow the person to change lanes.

    131. Re:Notification for everything by doginthewoods · · Score: 1

      Fox News? You know they are not a news source, with no obligation to tell the truth, don't you? They stated so in a court of law. FYI, if you get it from Fox, it is spin. "Fair & balanced" has nothing to do with facts and lies, something Fox can't figure out.

      --
      Republican leadership = Idiocracy
    132. Re:Notification for everything by clone53421 · · Score: 1

      I'd suggest you go and attend an advanced driving class someday, the only way to grasp these things is to actually do them once (not on a public street, please).

      I have news for you: Yes, I know how to drive on snow. Yes, I am aware that braking is ineffective in snow. In fact, I have tried these things (and on public streets in fact – ok, usually late at night on deserted side-streets). I am fully aware that locking your brakes, even at low speed, puts you in a nearly-uncontrolled slide (and only try it on level pavement, or you'll end up sliding sideways).

      However, common sense still applies. Snow decreases traction; traction is required for acceleration (speaking in the terms of the physics involved: acceleration is inclusive of both deceleration and turning). Traction is not required to travel in a straight line.

      Therefore, there is no good reason to go 5-20 MPH on the freeway when you're going straight and there's no traffic trying to merge in (e.g. at an entrance).

      --
      Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
    133. Re:Notification for everything by Marcos+Eliziario · · Score: 1

      Never thought there were that so many Ohioans here in Rio de Janeiro, Teresopolis and Sao Paulo (brasil).

      --
      Your ad could be here!
    134. Re:Notification for everything by AceofSpades19 · · Score: 1

      I think you have to be really stupid to know they aren't a news source

    135. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      woah -- you are a little out of touch there in rural montana I would say.

      an expert on high density highway design in montana? Until the cows and sheep get a license I don't think you will see the same problem.

    136. Re:Notification for everything by smoker2 · · Score: 1

      Until they hit the barrier and end up directly across your path. Have fun.

    137. Re:Notification for everything by Marcos+Eliziario · · Score: 1

      When I pass, I wait until I can see both headlights of the car I passed in my rearview mirror. Then I signal and move over. Anyone who thinks I wait too long to move over or who, worse, tries to shoot through the gap between us is an incompetent menace.

      or is a frustrated racer......

      It fuck annoys me people who think that they are entitled to stay on the left lane just because they are close to the speed limit, and thus, on their twisted minds, they think they must act like some sort of cops and violate the law by negating passage to a faster car. But, it also annoys me the kind of people who think that they are on a racing circuit by doing exactly what you've described.

      --
      Your ad could be here!
    138. Re:Notification for everything by Marcos+Eliziario · · Score: 1

      Not being an american, and having never lived on the US, it scares me out the hell the mere thought of what kind of car a Grand Marquis could be.

      Thanks for fucking my christmas day with the images you've made me dream of about a car with such a name. I only hope it doesn't have some kind of fake wooden finish on it's doors.

      --
      Your ad could be here!
    139. Re:Notification for everything by mortonda · · Score: 1

      If I'm in a particularly sour mood, I'll just catch up with the car on the right and slow down to match... *evil laugh*

    140. Re:Notification for everything by Kent+Recal · · Score: 1

      Well, 20MPH on snow means a braking distance of about 8 car lengths - easily more if you're unlucky or have your fat cousin on the backseat.
      If you really think that entrances are the only possible obstacles on a freeway then well, I can only hope we'll seldomly drive on the same freeway in bad weather...

      And yes, common sense obviously applies. On a sunny day there is no reason to go slow on a freeway. But people overestimating their own capabilities and underestimating physics are the primary reason why you see so many of those funny domino-accidents in the winter.

    141. Re:Notification for everything by Dirtside · · Score: 1

      Or, if you don't want people in your car thinking you're the kind of guy who might eat their livers with a nice Chianti, you could just count to two.

      (Actually, I always heard of it as the count-to-three rule.)

      --
      "Destroy science and religion. Science would re-emerge exactly the same; but not religion." - Penn Jillette, paraphrased
    142. Re:Notification for everything by Dirtside · · Score: 1

      If you're still using the "left-right" model as your basis for political thought, you need a refresher course in reality, where political beliefs cannot be plotted along a one-dimensional line.

      --
      "Destroy science and religion. Science would re-emerge exactly the same; but not religion." - Penn Jillette, paraphrased
    143. Re:Notification for everything by triffid_98 · · Score: 1
      Yes, they're called old people.

      Have your fellow Idahoians been moving to California? There seems to have been an increase of slow-drivers-that-won't-move-over here. Recently.

    144. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      E.g. means "for example". I.e. means "in other words". They are not the same.

    145. Re:Notification for everything by wolrahnaes · · Score: 1

      Ever seen an American Police car or Taxi from about the last 10 years? That's almost certainly a Ford Crown Victoria. The Mercury Grand Marquis is basically a Crown Vic with a bit more leather and chrome attached and sells almost exclusively to those aged 60 and up.

      --
      I used to get high on life, but I developed a tolerance. Now I need something stronger.
    146. Re:Notification for everything by laddiebuck · · Score: 1

      Americans. (I'm not, and I still use the word in the old sense. I would guess you fellows allowed some special interest group to change the meaning for you. Did you also notice that its connotation changed from universally positive to a politically-charged term?)

    147. Re:Notification for everything by Timex · · Score: 1

      Massachusetts is the exception, then. There, it is perfectly legal to pass on the right on divided highways.

      Of course, this assumes that a Massachusetts driver is aware of the traffic laws...

      --
      When politicians are involved, everyone loses.
    148. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Of course they teach that. Problem is that morons like clone53421 don't think it applies to them, since they're so much better than everyone else.

    149. Re:Notification for everything by hob42 · · Score: 1

      each progressive lane in the driver's-side direction should be moving faster than the preceding lane at all times.

      I suppose this depends on your jurisdiction, because where I grew up and learned to drive, the basic protocol of highways with more than two lanes each direction was that the center lane was the "slow" lane, lanes to the left for passing, and lanes to the right for local/merging traffic. That's what drivers ed teaches, that's what the state drivers' handbooks teach, that's what the defensive driving courses teach.

      That was Oklahoma. You'd probably be ticketed for driving that way in Texas, though; it's a law that you must drive in the right-most lane except when actively passing slower traffic. (I've been pulled over for driving in the left lane through a little town with no traffic in either direction for miles around.)

    150. Re:Notification for everything by TheStonepedo · · Score: 1

      I have to travel for work and regularly weave through city traffic rushing to drop rental cars and catch flights. I think of it as a grown-up Frogger much like in the Seinfeld episode and am always cautious around trucks.

      --
      I'll be your candy shop of infinite deliciousity if you'll be my discotheque of endless rump-shaking.
    151. Re:Notification for everything by TheStonepedo · · Score: 1

      I think, despite the joking nature, your post is relevant to this issue because it emphasizes a part of passing that many have seemingly forgotten. It is important to actually get on the gas and pass rather than creeping along at a few inches per second more than the vehicle next to you. The passed driver will be aware of your position if he sees you approach, pass, and move over rather than merely aware of your presence somewhere in his blind spot. As a corollary to this forced increase in speed, it is often necessary to decrease your speed slightly after passing - an excellent reason to leave a reasonable gap between your vehicle and the vehicle you just passed. For me, a play-by-play is something like this (70 mph speed limit):
      1) I am driving 70 mph in the right lane and see a vehicle several seconds ahead going slower, perhaps 67 mph, in the same lane.
      2) I signal and move to the left lane, my vehicle still at 70 mph.
      3) As I approach the vehicle I will pass, I increase my speed to 75 mph so that I spend minimal time beside the other vehicle.
      4) Once I reach a reasonable distance ahead of the now-passed vehicle I signal and move right, still at 75 mph.
      5) I decrease my speed to 70 mph again once the entire maneuver is complete.

      I believe all of the other posts are omitting steps (3) and (5), possibly replacing them with "3) ???" and "5) Profit!"

      --
      I'll be your candy shop of infinite deliciousity if you'll be my discotheque of endless rump-shaking.
    152. Re:Notification for everything by TheStonepedo · · Score: 1

      Half of the drivers in your vicinity are above average, half are below, and you must drive with both halves at the same time. Your ability and skill should make you less likely to rear-end another vehicle, but the ability and skill of the driver behind you determine if your vehicle will be rear-ended. Leaving reasonable gaps can give you enough room to avoid simple fender-benders, and the time wasted dealing with a single accident is far greater than a lifetime of saving a moment here and there by changing lanes at high relative speed and low relative wiggle room.

      --
      I'll be your candy shop of infinite deliciousity if you'll be my discotheque of endless rump-shaking.
    153. Re:Notification for everything by FredFredrickson · · Score: 1

      Unexpected stops being rare certainly doesn't prove you're a good driver, it just means you haven't died yet.

      --
      Belief? Hope? Preference?The Existential Vortex
    154. Re:Notification for everything by FredFredrickson · · Score: 1

      Haha, I live in New Hampshire, and I've seen far too many people in SUVs or other cars get pissed when I go slow in the snow (I have had such a sobering experience that you describe).

      The (not-so)-funny thing about it is that when they get pissed I'm going slow, they pass me at the nearest opening with 2 lanes. I watch them speed up from 25-30 to about 45, fish tail their way into the oncoming traffic lane, turn quick, end up perpendicular to the road, and then slowly take off again.

      You'd think people like this would learn. Of course I can probably get up to 45 as long as there are no unexpected stops or turns. But it's the unexpected you should watch out for. Since you can't predict the unexpected- I advise you take everything carefully.

      But then again, maybe I just have too much experience driving in actually bad conditions.

      Anybody who claims they can magically stop on a dime with no warning in -or- out of the snow is clearly somebody who hasn't yet had a close-to-death experience in a car... or somebody that HAS had one, and doesn't heed good advice.

      --
      Belief? Hope? Preference?The Existential Vortex
    155. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Congratulations. You win... nothing.

    156. Re:Notification for everything by jonadab · · Score: 1

      > This is the one I would use the most. Apparently Ohioans don't understand the term "passing lane".

      Many Americans seem to be under the impression that the passing lane is reserved for people who are going faster than the speed limit. In fact, it is every bit as illegal to speed in the left lane as it is in any other lane.

      Now, if some idiot's doing 30mph in the passing lane, then you should call the police and report him, because he's definitely not supposed to do that. (Though you should also be aware that passing him on the right is, nonetheless, generally a ticketable offense, although there may be an exception clause for limited-access highways, at least in some states.)

      It has generally been my experience, however, that 95+% of the complaints about people "not knowing what a passing lane is" and driving too slow in one are regarding a driver who is in fact within 5mph or so of the posted speed limit, in which case the complaint is invalid. It's generally illegal to pass such a driver on either side (although I think passing on the right may be a worse offense than speeding), and the people who complain about it are, as a rule, impatient sociopathic speed demons who should not be allowed to drive on the road.

      --
      Cut that out, or I will ship you to Norilsk in a box.
    157. Re:Notification for everything by jonadab · · Score: 1

      > If someone else can zip around you, you had plenty of space to safely move to the right.

      This is absolutely untrue. At 65mph the minimum safe distance is about six carlengths. If you can't see their heighlights in your rearview mirror, you should not be pulling over in front of them.

      > and there's no reason for you to slow down or stop in the near future

      You're supposed to drive as if you don't know the future. Because you don't.

      > (easily determined by looking ahead)

      Apparently you live in a bizarro universe where things like deer never run out onto the road suddenly?

      Well, over here in the real world we don't always know ahead of time when we're going to need to slow down.

      > especially if you're doing a slow pass instead of finishing the damn maneuver and getting over to the right

      By "slow pass" I assume you mean passing without speeding -- which is the only legally acceptable way to do it.

      --
      Cut that out, or I will ship you to Norilsk in a box.
    158. Re:Notification for everything by jonadab · · Score: 1

      > That's a stupid rule.

      On the contrary, the carlength-per-10mph rule is a pretty good rule of thumb, although if your brakes and/or reaction time are bad it can be inadequate.

      > You don't have to stop in the distance between you and the car ahead of you

      No, but...

      > You don't have to stop in the distance between you and the car ahead of you.
      > You have to stop in the distance between you plus the distance it takes him to stop.

      That's also wrong, and an extremely dangerous notion to keep in your head if you're a driver.

      In fact, you have to stop in the distance between you and the car ahead of you, plus the distance the car ahead of you travels while stopping, *less* the distance you travel during your reaction time. The distance you travel during your reaction time is about a carlength per 10mph, more if you're slow on the uptake.

      So the rule of thumb actually assumes your brakes are at least as good as the ones on the car ahead of you. If your brakes are bad, you should theoretically try to leave *more* distance if you can. Although in practice sometimes traffic conditions are such that you simply cannot leave much more than 4-5 carlengths, because somebody will promptly pull into that space in front of you and drive there; if that's happening repeatedly, it's better to leave a little less space, even though it's not ideal, because it's safer than getting repeatedly cut off like that.

      --
      Cut that out, or I will ship you to Norilsk in a box.
    159. Re:Notification for everything by jonadab · · Score: 1

      > I'm not sure what reasons you may have for passing someone, but generally when I
      > pass someone, it is because they are traveling at a lower speed than I would prefer.

      There may also be times when people might pass a vehicle because they don't want to be behind it. My dad doesn't like to be behind semi trucks, for instance, partly because they obstruct his view of the road ahead (yes, he's a tailgater something aweful) but also partly because they tend not to maintain a constant speed, since they slow down uphill and speed up downhill. He doesn't like that.

      > In passing them, I have already accelerated to a higher speed than they are traveling.
      > When I merge back over, I am still moving faster than they are- because of this, there
      > is no reason for them to unexpectedly slow down.

      The problem is what happens if *you* have to suddenly slow down, and they are behind you. You don't *expect* that to happen (or you wouldn't have passed them), but sometimes things occur that you did not anticipate. Safe drivers leave a bit of margin to give people time to react to unexpected events that may occur.

      > The only way I can see this becoming an issue is if you're accelerating to pass somebody,
      > then slowing down to the same or a slower speed than that person is traveling. If that's
      > the case, you're just being an asshole.

      I will agree that pulling out in front of somebody and then slowing down to their speed or less is at best extremely rude and at worst very dangerous. (FWIW, though there are things I don't like about my dad's driving, he does not commit this particular transgression. When he passes, he invariably continues afterward to move faster than the vehicle he has just passed until he is a considerable distance ahead of them.)

      --
      Cut that out, or I will ship you to Norilsk in a box.
    160. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      You mean the incoming President and the current President right?

    161. Re:Notification for everything by clone53421 · · Score: 1

      You never know when the guy to your right is going to turn out to be one of those jerks who accelerates to prevent you from coming over. That's happened to me plenty of times.

      Those people deserve to be cut off. The key is to pass quickly (as someone else said, you should be moving significantly faster than the car you're passing). Among other things, that means if they try to pull forward when you signal to get over, you can just give it a tad more gas and pull in with half a car length instead of a length and a half. If you're already moving significantly faster than them, they can't accelerate enough to prevent you from changing lanes, and they'll just have to slow back down when you get in front.

      --
      Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
    162. Re:Notification for everything by clone53421 · · Score: 1

      You might consider passing slightly quicker and getting over slightly earlier. It's often safer to push the envelope a hair yourself than have some idiot do something blatantly dangerous right on your back bumper.

      --
      Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
    163. Re:Notification for everything by jonadab · · Score: 1

      > This rule will not allow sufficient traffic to move at posted speeds with the
      > number of lanes available in most US highway configurations.

      I don't know about "most", but you are certainly correct that there are sometimes real-world traffic conditions do not allow the rule to be followed. So let me add a second rule of thumb for those situations:

      If you are repeatedly cut off by people pulling into the space ahead of you and driving there (not just an idiot driver being foolish, but a pattern driven by the number of cars on the road), then you need to leave a little less space, even if it's not ideal, because it's safer than being repeatedly cut off like that.

      > So while the rule is a great guide for safety purposes, it is effectively useless

      It's useless when traffic conditions will not allow you to follow it. In that case, use the second rule.

      But when you *can* follow the carlength-per-10mph rule, you generally should.

      --
      Cut that out, or I will ship you to Norilsk in a box.
    164. Re:Notification for everything by clone53421 · · Score: 1

      In fact, you have to stop in the distance between you and the car ahead of you, plus the distance the car ahead of you travels while stopping, *less* the distance you travel during your reaction time. The distance you travel during your reaction time is about a carlength per 10mph, more if you're slow on the uptake.

      I always watch the road further ahead than the car directly ahead. That means I'll be able to react to the same thing the driver in front is reacting to, which means if necessary I'll begin stopping at about the same time he does (give or take, depending on how our reflexes compare). If I can't see around the car in front of me, or if conditions are such that people ahead of him may do something abruptly, it affects how I follow – under typical driving conditions, I'm able to see what's happening several cars up.

      --
      Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
    165. Re:Notification for everything by clone53421 · · Score: 1

      I do give myself a buffer to avoid using my brakes in stop-and-go traffic, and usually it works pretty well. However, you've got to be careful to use the correct amount of space... leave too much and somebody will pull in. Then you have to use the brakes anyway, which defeats the purpose of leaving the buffer in the first place.

      --
      Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
    166. Re:Notification for everything by clone53421 · · Score: 1

      If there's no reason for me to slow down after getting in front, there's no reason for said granny to slow down either... I'm moving significantly faster than her. In another two seconds I'll be far enough ahead that she'll have her gap again. Am I going to have to abruptly stop before she gets her gap back? Well, I wouldn't have pulled in front of her if that were at all likely... I'm not an ass.

      --
      Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
    167. Re:Notification for everything by jonadab · · Score: 1

      20mph on the highway is still stupid and dangerous.

      Yes, it takes longer to change speed or direction on snow (although if your braking "does nothing", you're doing it wrong; snow is not asphalt, and treating as though it is does not yield good results). You need to leave yourself more room to stop, which means more room between vehicles, so there's more room to stop. (Yes, there's room on the highway when it's snowy to leave more room between vehicles than usual, because of all the people who aren't on the road because of the snow, and if NOT then the heavy traffic will have eradicated the snow and the pavement will be dry, like the interstates typically are even when the snow is still coming down.) You also need to be careful and have some experience on snow. People who have not walked and run and played on snow should NOT attempt to drive on it. If you just moved up from Georgia and have never seen so much white stuff before in your life, please don't drive on it until you've done enough walking and running on it to be comfortable with the physics. This generally takes at least a couple of months, even if you're fairly bright.

      When turning around while running on a thin layer of wet snow (on a smooth surface like pavement) is something easy that you do without thinking, and without looking at your feet, then maybe you're ready to try driving on it.

      --
      Cut that out, or I will ship you to Norilsk in a box.
    168. Re:Notification for everything by clone53421 · · Score: 1

      Apparently you live in a bizarro universe where things like deer never run out onto the road suddenly?

      Actually, yes. It's called the "city".

      By "slow pass" I assume you mean passing without speeding -- which is the only legally acceptable way to do it.

      What bizarro universe do YOU live in? You actually expect people to obey the speed limit? Ok, so you don't speed. Good for you, now keep reading:

      If there's faster moving traffic that wants to pass YOU, and passing someone will take you longer than, oh, say 15 or 20 seconds, you have no business passing them. If you don't want to speed, fine, but it's not your job to enforce the speed limit on everyone behind you. Quit being a pompous know-it-all and just drive.

      I don't care if somebody's already going 75 in a 55 zone: If they're in the left lane and somebody comes up behind them doing 85, they need to get right and let the faster traffic pass.

      --
      Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
    169. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Now, if some idiot's doing 30mph in the passing lane, then you should call the police and report him, because he's definitely not supposed to do that.

      I once tried to report a party to the cops for definite under-aged drinking and probable drug use and the cops did nothing. If you tried to call in a slow driver, they'd probably laugh you off the phone. Literally.

    170. Re:Notification for everything by clone53421 · · Score: 1

      There is no obligatiuon / law that says you have to allow the person to change lanes.

      Ok, but if you hit them from behind you are automatically at fault. Have fun in court.

      --
      Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
    171. Re:Notification for everything by Bryan3000000 · · Score: 1

      That would be a *classical* liberal. Or what would now be called social liberal, economic conservative. Although the conservatives these days by no means have any interest in restricting spending. They just want to spend it on realizing the dream of big brother and guns. The democrats aren't much different, they just want big brother with fewer guns and more of everything else.

      Classical liberals and libertarians have a lot in common. Anarchists would have it down if it weren't so hard to maintain a peaceful anarchy without somebody turning it into something else.

    172. Re:Notification for everything by jonadab · · Score: 1

      > > a deer suddenly jumps from the trees beside the road in front of your car,
      > > or an idiot in the right lane decides to move into your lane.

      > Both of those are foreseeable possibilities based on conditions.
      > Bad conditions obviously mean you need to be more careful.

      If things like there being trees along the side of the road or drivers in another lane qualify as "bad conditions", it's probably best to just figure on bad conditions pretty much all the time. Those aren't exactly unusual circumstances, and there are plenty more similarly dangerous and similarly common kinds of situations where they came from. Night, going over a hill (you never know what's just over the top until you're pretty much there), rain, fog, night, the sun in your eyes, potholes, kids on bikes, dogs, cats, coons, possums, flat tires, small pieces of road debris (e.g., gravel) flying up from the car ahead and hitting the windshield, ...

      Stuff happens, in other words.

      If you leave a bit more space between your car and the next one, you'll have that much more time to react and deal with whatever situation may arise. It's just safer. And the amount of time it costs you, even on a quite long trip, is generally going to be measured in seconds.

      --
      Cut that out, or I will ship you to Norilsk in a box.
    173. Re:Notification for everything by jonadab · · Score: 1

      > I believe all of the other posts are omitting steps (3) and (5),

      Where I come from step 3 is called "speeding". It's not okay to speed just because you're passing someone. People do it all the time, of course... and complain when they get caught and ticketed. I have no sympathy at all.

      If the guy ahead of you is going so close to the speed limit that you can't pass without speeding, then you do not need to pass him. Even if you have to follow the guy for an entire hour, those 3mph are only going to cost you two and a half minutes. Get over it. If that kind of impatience doesn't get you killed, it will at least give you an ulcer. Chill out a little.

      --
      Cut that out, or I will ship you to Norilsk in a box.
    174. Re:Notification for everything by jonadab · · Score: 1

      > I hope our far-left overlords are more benevolent than the far-right ones were.

      Oh, man, if you think Bush is far-right, you really have no idea how far *right* the right can go.

      Far right would be someone who wants to put the dollar back on the gold standard, put retirement planning back in the hands of individual workers, decouple health insurance from employment so that people can make their own choices about what coverage to buy, require the jurors on malpractice suits to be licensed medical doctors (the defendant's peers), deregulate the automobile industry (specifically, stop telling the manufacturers what kinds of vehicles they can and can't build and sell), outlaw closed-shop union contracts so that workers can make their own individual choice whether to unionize or not, and cut the federal budget across the board 30% the first year, and then turn around and cut it 30% again the next year, and again the next, using the resulting surplus to pay down the national debt and cut income taxes. Oh, and do I need to even mention that he'd want to make the income tax rate the same for all income brackets?

      No, we're not in any danger of getting someone like that as President. He could get the vote in the conservative states, but he'd never win in the moderate swing states, and the GOP knows this and would never give such a person the party nomination, not with the electoral college system in place in its current form.

      But that's where the far right is. And those are just the economic issues. Do you even want to think about where the far right is on social issues? Just knowing where the far right stands on the issue of divorce could make a liberal's blood boil.

      --
      Cut that out, or I will ship you to Norilsk in a box.
    175. Re:Notification for everything by clone53421 · · Score: 1

      95% of my driving is on familiar highways in the middle of the city. Other drivers tend to be quite predictable and there aren't trees or wildlife near the highway.

      --
      Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
    176. Re:Notification for everything by mr_matticus · · Score: 1

      Six of one...

      Merging and local traffic is still slower than cruising traffic in the middle lanes. The "slow" lane should still be moving at a good clip so as to prevent people merging onto the freeway from being trapped in the right lane.

    177. Re:Notification for everything by c4colorado · · Score: 1

      "_Opportunities_ to avoid an accident"

      Driving in the Left lane constantly tends to make people mad. They want to pass you. They will try to pass you on the right, the left, the shoulder... they will cut people off to pass you.

      Therefore if you drove in the right (i.e. correct and/or rightmost) lane you wouldn't have all of these "Opportunities" to avoid accidents, because you wouldn't be bombarded by infuriated idiots trying to get around you.

      I can see his logic. The more of these "opportunities" you live through the better driver you will become... and if you don't live through them, hopefully you take one (or more) of those infuriated idiots off the road with you. I don't agree with the notion, but after 50 years of teaching brats to drive you would probably develop devious and senile ways of using your driving students as vehicles (pun unintended) for your revenge on society.

      Drive in the correct lane... it's safer, even if you don't get the experience of avoiding accidents all the time.

      --
      -- This sig intentionally left blank --

    178. Re:Notification for everything by ReverendLoki · · Score: 1

      You are arguing that any stupid political move is a product of far-right ideology, and trying to use anecdotal evidence of some stupid policies of the far-right as proof. I argue that stupid political policies can arise from any point of the political spectrum, as can good policies.

      Thing is, to prove my point, I need only cover one example of each, whereas to prove your point, you need to prove it across the sample set of all political policies.

      Take, for example, the Libertarians. All in all, they are a very far-right group (truly far-right, not this pseudo "socially conservative, financially liberal and eager to intercede in your lifestyle" group that's so vocal nowadays), and though they have their fair share of crazies, they have plenty of what I'd consider good ideas.

      --
      09 F9 11 02 9D 74 E3 5B D8 41 56 C5 63 56 88 C0
    179. Re:Notification for everything by n7ytd · · Score: 1

      That's a stupid rule. You don't have to stop in the distance between you and the car ahead of you. You have to stop in the distance between you plus the distance it takes him to stop.

      No, you have to react and then stop in that distance. When the car in front of you slams on the brakes for the deer in the road, your brain needs to recognize the tail lights of the car in front of you, move your foot from the accelerator to the brake pedal, and apply stopping force to your car.

      At 65 MPH, you are moving at a bit over 95 feet/second. In the quarter of a second that it took you to start to apply the brakes, you've traveled over 23 feet--well over a car length.

    180. Re:Notification for everything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      ...right, invisible deer that only the driver in front of me can see. This makes perfect sense...

    181. Re:Notification for everything by fyngyrz · · Score: 1

      I've lived many years - decades - in many metro areas. I came to Montana because, among other things, the traffic sucketh considerably less. I still drive to both coasts several times a year and become somewhat refreshed on the current state of metro traffic viz NYC, Boston, Chicago, Detroit, San Francisco, LA, Seattle and Portland. So don't worry too much about my expertise. There's enough there to hazard an opinion or two, despite where I choose to make my home.

      --
      I've fallen off your lawn, and I can't get up.
  4. pong by imp7 · · Score: 5, Funny

    A never ending game of pong

  5. Obvious use by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny

    Put it in your window at home and use it to hollah for girls that pass by.

  6. Here you go by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    porn video => avi to ascii converter => red hot LED action

    1. Re:Here you go by TrashGod · · Score: 1

      Capital idea! Sadly, all my ASCII p0rn requires a 9x7 font, but you can render your own with QuickASCII

    2. Re:Here you go by Pe_Ell · · Score: 1

      Glad someone else beat me to suggesting that one. Nothing like scrolling ascii porn to distract people. :)

      --
      Midget Tosser
  7. Chatty Co-Worker Evasion by JerBear0 · · Score: 2, Insightful

    Combine it with a motion sensor near your door, and have it warn you to duck under your desk.

    --
    Bad experience is a school that only fools keep going to.
  8. ascii penis! by larry+bagina · · Score: 2, Funny

    8=====D

    --
    Do you even lift?

    These aren't the 'roids you're looking for.

    1. Re:ascii penis! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Rule 34 sir.

    2. Re:ascii penis! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      8=====D O:

    3. Re:ascii penis! by spazdor · · Score: 0, Troll

      This is hilarious and whoever modded you down is a cock.

      --
      DRM: Terminator crops for your mind!
    4. Re:ascii penis! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Messed up a moderation in this topic and posting to undo it.

  9. Do you really need to ask? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Insightful

    Never underestimate a technology's capacity to be used for porn.

    1. Re:Do you really need to ask? by Shakrai · · Score: 2, Funny

      Never underestimate a technology's capacity to be used for porn.

      Rumor has it that man learned to walk upright to free his hands for "other" uses ;)

      --
      I want peace on earth and goodwill toward man.
      We are the United States Government! We don't do that sort of thing.
    2. Re:Do you really need to ask? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      dont know about you, but i dont usually walk and jerk off at the same time.

    3. Re:Do you really need to ask? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      I call it spreading the love!

    4. Re:Do you really need to ask? by Kamokazi · · Score: 1

      ( ))===|D >+o ?

      --
      As our way of thanking you for your positive contributions to Slashdot, you are eligible to disable Slashdot 2.0.
    5. Re:Do you really need to ask? by thePowerOfGrayskull · · Score: 2, Funny

      Dude, what kind of disease do /you/ have? That's nasty...

    6. Re:Do you really need to ask? by MadnessASAP · · Score: 1

      What in holy fucks name is going on there.

      --
      I may agree with what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to face the consequences of saying it.
    7. Re:Do you really need to ask? by Kamokazi · · Score: 1

      What, you expect one line of ASCII is supposed to be proportionally accurate?

      It's at least twice that size.

      --
      As our way of thanking you for your positive contributions to Slashdot, you are eligible to disable Slashdot 2.0.
    8. Re:Do you really need to ask? by thegnu · · Score: 1

      dont know about you, but i dont usually walk and jerk off at the same time.

      Yeah, AC. Riiiiiiiiiiiiight

      --
      Please stop stalking me, bro.
  10. Re:pong or tetris by nullchar · · Score: 2, Interesting

    Tetris has been played on just about everything, I don't see why you can't port a crappy version to this screen.

  11. how about a log file parser by youngdev · · Score: 0

    When it "sees" a fatal or critical error, pipe it into the file and let it display on the led screen. should be pretty easy to do with a tiny shell program.

  12. does it have buttons on it? by Plazmid · · Score: 1

    Hack the firmware and make it play pong. Or a very simple version of doom.

  13. Two words for you by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Hello World

  14. Re:pong or tetris by Decameron81 · · Score: 2, Insightful

    Tetris can't be crappy.

    --
    diegoT
  15. Music by CopaceticOpus · · Score: 5, Interesting

    Getting it to display audio level meters for your music would be kinda fun.

    1. Re:Music by sponga · · Score: 1

      We used to travel in groups of cars to job sites we had and one of our guys had the best thing ever.

      He would play his mp3's but they would be broadcast over a certain radio station 98.1 over the little device he would plug into the input connector of his mp3 player. If you were within about 5-6 car lengths you could pickup what he was listening to, I imagine with a little more powerful antenna you would share with the whole freeway and since we are in L.A. traffic than it is stop and go all the way home..

      I would setup and LED sign advertising to tune it to a certain radio station and the song that was playing at the moment so other commuters could enjoy what you were listening to.

      Share the wealth I say, plus you advertise your phone number on there and take request.

  16. For maximum freakout potential by greg_barton · · Score: 5, Interesting

    For maximum freakout potential you'll need two things:

    1) A microphone
    2) Speech recognition software

    Set the microphone up in a hidden place where it will pick up speech from folks hanging around your desk, and connect it to your computer. Set up the speech recognition software so it will spit out text to the LED display's interface.

    Viola! Instant "Have we entered the twilight zone?" machine!

    1. Re:For maximum freakout potential by codegen · · Score: 4, Interesting

      Feed the speech recognition into Eliza and Eliza's output to the display.

      --
      Atlas stands on the earth and carries the celestial sphere on his shoulders.
    2. Re:For maximum freakout potential by Al+Al+Cool+J · · Score: 4, Interesting

      Ding ding. I think we have a winner! There's a Chatbot::Eliza perl module so this could be do-able. Now I want to get me one of those LED screens, so I can try this!

    3. Re:For maximum freakout potential by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      The speech recognition suggestion is awesome!

      You could also display a random "fortune" to it.

      Or since you can "change the font" you could configure it as a vertical or horizontal meter.

      The Audio level suggestion is pretty cool too...could setup a vertical graphical equalizer display.

      Or pong. One red dot just bounces around inside the box.

      Or use it to display output from "life".

    4. Re:For maximum freakout potential by __aasqbs9791 · · Score: 3, Funny

      That is a great idea. Certainly more novel than many of the others I've seen. And it gives you an excuse to talk to your computer without sounding crazy. Well, too crazy.

    5. Re:For maximum freakout potential by PCM2 · · Score: 1

      It is a fun idea, but so far as I know all full-language speech recognition software still requires extensive "training" by the user in order for it to get the words right consistently. It's not advanced enough yet to be able to pick up random voices and construct accurate sentences from them.

      --
      Breakfast served all day!
    6. Re:For maximum freakout potential by Al+Al+Cool+J · · Score: 1

      The voice recognition doesn't need to be perfect, or even good, because it is all being passed through Eliza. The chatbot just needs a few choice word to key on, and will take it from there. It may be that Eliza isn't the best choice for ignoring garbage input, but I'm sure there are other chatbot options.

    7. Re:For maximum freakout potential by Cecil · · Score: 1

      Mark V Shaney or a similar Markov-chain based text generator is probably nearly ideal for such a project. It will spew often incomprehensible, sometimes hilariously comprehensible gibberish about whatever it has heard being talked about.

    8. Re:For maximum freakout potential by RMH101 · · Score: 1

      This is a genius idea. For extra bonus points, encase LED screen and mic in a huge, ominous blinkenlights box or rack. Make occasional reference to your 80:20 project you've been working on. Hilarity ensues

  17. Re:Wow by Shadow+of+Eternity · · Score: 2, Informative

    I like cocoa.

    --
    A bullet may have your name on it but splash damage is addressed "To whom it may concern."
  18. Analog LED computer.. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    ...to supplement your (apparently Windows) desktop machine?

    But seriously, folks:

    - Rain gauge
    - Hope meter
    - Cray-style front panel indicators? Mem registers, etc. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A5RwZz9UPUs - jump to about 0:50 and watch the rest)
    - Strings from network traffic? Count and display the number of occurances of the Top 5 most commonly reused strings snarfed from office-wide network traffic?

  19. I'd use it to by Cornwallis · · Score: 1

    publicly display line by line the EULA for Linux SUSE 11.1.

  20. how about by visdog · · Score: 1

    Karaoke,typing out phone conversations as you are speaking so you don't have to listen. build website to take advantage of serial conversation interfaces,have a small device that fits on a keychain with 5 or so buttons. A small,web connected green computer.

  21. One word. by MMC+Monster · · Score: 1

    Pong

    --
    Help! I'm a slashdot refugee.
  22. Five Hours? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0, Interesting

    It's almost 5 hours since the last story and this is the best /. could come up with?

    Oh well, it is x-mas eve I guess.

    Happy hollandaise everyone!

  23. Oh I know! First thing to do is... by madmaxmedia · · Score: 3, Funny

    ...have it display all new comments to this thread.

  24. Re:pong or tetris by Aklyon · · Score: 2, Insightful

    neither can pong.

    --
    I reserve the right to have a physical object so I can sell it later, and recover my money.
  25. For kids by umoto · · Score: 3, Interesting

    I've been thinking it would be cool to get a sign like that and post it in a visible place at home, then use it to post announcements about my kids' accomplishments. I'd set it up so my wife could change it as well. We'd post things like "John did the dishes every day this week", "Mary aced her math test", etc.

    The intent would be to show them we care and to give them positive reinforcement.

    1. Re:For kids by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      I've been thinking it would be cool to get a sign like that and post it in a visible place at home, then use it to post announcements about my kids' accomplishments. I'd set it up so my wife could change it as well. We'd post things like "John did the dishes every day this week", "Mary aced her math test", etc.

      The intent would be to show them we care and to give them positive reinforcement.

      The result would be that not only will your kids know you're dorks, everyone else will too.

    2. Re:For kids by ranok · · Score: 5, Funny

      Yeah, I can imagine the kids' horror when they bring over their friends, and have to explain why their parents are so lame. "Uhhh, what's that on the wall" "Nothing, my dad's just a dork" "Oh" "Come on, let's get out of here"

      --
      (>'.')>
    3. Re:For kids by NekoXP · · Score: 4, Insightful

      Why don't you just TELL them?

      I dread to think what you got them for Christmahannukwanzaa this year.

    4. Re:For kids by IceCreamGuy · · Score: 1

      I celebrate Festivus, you inconsiderate clod!

    5. Re:For kids by vux984 · · Score: 1

      And now for the test of strength... :)

    6. Re:For kids by ConceptJunkie · · Score: 1

      The intent would be to show them we care and to give them positive reinforcement.

      What if your kids never do anything right?

      --
      You are in a maze of twisty little passages, all alike.
    7. Re:For kids by el3mentary · · Score: 1

      I celebrate Winterval you insensitive clod!

      --
      I reject your reality and substitute my own.
    8. Re:For kids by umoto · · Score: 1

      I provided you no information that could allow you to logically reach such a conclusion.

      Merry Christmas!

  26. Only useful for the pointy-haired by Gothmolly · · Score: 3, Funny

    The other helpdesk people are going to be focused on their tasks, not glancing around the room for the possibility of some LED screen update. If there's an actual issue they need to know about, you should already have something in place for that.

    What managers love to see are things like average call time, # calls in the queue, and # dropped calls. If you can extract that out of your call tree application and put that up there, you're one step closer to pointy hair yourself.

    --
    I want to delete my account but Slashdot doesn't allow it.
    1. Re:Only useful for the pointy-haired by Xaoswolf · · Score: 4, Insightful

      of course, if he doesn't work in a call center, but is instead one of a few IT people, putting that outisde of his office with a message saying something along the lines of "SQL Server down for update, will be up at 4pm" will stop perhaps one or two people from knocking on his door to ask why the server is down and when it will be back up.

    2. Re:Only useful for the pointy-haired by Hal_Porter · · Score: 1

      What managers love to see are things like average call time, # calls in the queue, and # dropped calls. If you can extract that out of your call tree application and put that up there, you're one step closer to pointy hair yourself.

      Only if you consider Dwight Schrute as a PHB.

      --
      echo -e 'global _start\n _start:\n mov eax, 2\n int 80h\n jmp _start' > a.asm; nasm a.asm -f elf; ld a.o -o a;
    3. Re:Only useful for the pointy-haired by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      No it won't. People will knock on the door, ask why the server is down, ask when it will be back up, and then ask if he knows there is some weird sign on his door.

    4. Re:Only useful for the pointy-haired by theurge14 · · Score: 1

      Anyone who has worked in retail will tell you that people do not read signs before asking.

  27. What about by gzipped_tar · · Score: 3, Funny

    Game of Life?

    --
    Colorless green Cthulhu waits dreaming furiously.
  28. Three words for you by BobNET · · Score: 5, Funny

    PC LOAD LETTER

    1. Re:Three words for you by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      What, no LP0 ON FIRE?

    2. Re:Three words for you by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I was thinking of four: "Out of Cheese Error" or "Divide By Cucumber Error".

    3. Re:Three words for you by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      PC Load Letter, What the fuck does that mean?

    4. Re:Three words for you by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I direct you, good sir, to google. "Google" is what is known as a search engine. You give it a search pattern, and it returns (hopefully matching) results. In this case, it works perfectly.

    5. Re:Three words for you by clone53421 · · Score: 2, Informative
      --
      Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
    6. Re:Three words for you by JAZ · · Score: 1

      What the f*** does that mean?

      --


      "Karma can only be portioned out by the cosmos." -- Homer Simpson
    7. Re:Three words for you by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Not a bad idea, actually! Have it let you know when the network printer is out of paper, low/out of toner, or is jammed! Maybe you can get brownie points for being up on the printer maintenance before someone's work is impacted because of it?

    8. Re:Three words for you by Whiteox · · Score: 1

      You sir are a genius!

      --
      Don't be apathetic. Procrastinate!
  29. Re:pong or tetris by operagost · · Score: 1

    You obviously never tried the "Daikatana" edition of Tetris. You can't finish a level without your buddy Superfly. I got 45 "L" pieces in a row and John Romero made me his bitch.

    --

    Gamingmuseum.com: Give your 3D accelerator a rest.
  30. Scroll the current National Debt by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Scroll the current National Debt, that is of course assuming that anyone can meaningfully read 11 trillion on a scrolling display.....

  31. You could set up a countdown... by allaunjsilverfox2 · · Score: 2, Funny

    Just pick a random day far in the future, And have it countdown to that day with the words, Only (insert time) until it happens! Then refuse to tell anyone what it means. It should provide interesting conversations at the water cooler.

    --
    Restore the madness of youth's lechery
    1. Re:You could set up a countdown... by Marcos+Eliziario · · Score: 1

      For added effect, and possibly the fun of meeting some guys from the FBI on the near future, you should do this and start collecting gun magazines on you desk, wear a long beard and buy your clothes from some military surplus store.

      --
      Your ad could be here!
  32. LED Belt Buckle by lejflo · · Score: 1

    Buy a belt buckle version and take that sexy geek desk accessory look with you wherever you go! http://igadgets.com/22-jb002.html

  33. Keep safe by Waffle+Iron · · Score: 4, Funny

    Use it as a ticker to scroll the real-time DoHS advisory status:

    ...ted >> Terrorist Threat Level: Elevated >> Terro...

    1. Re:Keep safe by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Insightful

      I don't know what the 'threat level' is today and I feel pretty safe.

    2. Re:Keep safe by MightyYar · · Score: 1

      Gentle citizen, you are not being VIGILANT! Only VIGILANCE will stop TERRORISTS!

      --
      W..w..W - Willy Waterloo washes Warren Wiggins who is washing Waldo Woo.
    3. Re:Keep safe by bickerdyke · · Score: 1

      http://www.geekandproud.net/terror/

      It has been Ernie/Bert for about a year....

      --
      bickerdyke
    4. Re:Keep safe by harry666t · · Score: 1

      I'd mod you +18, insightful if I could.

  34. Stock ticker by steveo777 · · Score: 2, Funny

    That shows stocks rising and falling at the will of its owner! Make people sell their Google stock so you can buy it slightly cheaper.

    --
    This sig isn't original enough, it's time to come up with something witty...
    1. Re:Stock ticker by windsurfer619 · · Score: 3, Funny

      Code for configuration file:
          \
            \
              \

  35. How about, "days left in life to lose viginity"? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Insightful

    Clearly anyone with such a clock would need to keep track of that.

  36. BOFH by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Have it read out the BOFH stories. Those should bring back fond memories of the first few thousand times you read them AND it will give the new kids in the office something to laugh about.

  37. Don't just say it, do it! by devnullkac · · Score: 5, Interesting

    Don't just say you read his emails. Actually put them up there! Continuous scroll of everything in your boss's inbox.

    If you're slightly less daring, feed your log of all URLs (site name only, perhaps) as they're being viewed by anyone in the office. Your boss did make you keep a log, didn't he?

    --
    What do you mean they cut the power? How can they cut the power, man? They're animals!
    1. Re:Don't just say it, do it! by barzok · · Score: 2, Interesting

      feed your log of all URLs (site name only, perhaps) as they're being viewed by anyone in the office

      This is by far the best suggestion I've seen thus far. Hours of entertainment!

    2. Re:Don't just say it, do it! by brokenbeaker · · Score: 1

      One of the earlier search engines had something like this - there was a live view of (all?) the searches being conducted at the time scrolling by at the bottom of the screen. It was called something like "search voyeur", and it was very interesting.

    3. Re:Don't just say it, do it! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      and the search exhibitionists all search for tranny buttsecks.

    4. Re:Don't just say it, do it! by 0100010001010011 · · Score: 1

      In college I had the largest shared porn cache on campus. After about 5 months of logs, I wrote a script to go through SMB logs and pull the top 10 titles and the top 100 users. They lasted about 1 day before one of the RAs (High on the list) ripped them down.

      Every morning you could set your clock to one of the Grad Assistants starting to stream something.

  38. Ebay! by Linker3000 · · Score: 3, Funny

    Stick it on ebay and with the money you receive go and enjoy the fast food meal of your choice!

    --
    AT&ROFLMAO
    1. Re:Ebay! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Stick it on ebay and with the money you receive go and enjoy the fast food meal of your choice!

      or... make the auction for advertising space... profit

  39. Caller ID by pjwhite · · Score: 3, Interesting

    Use it to display caller ID for incoming phone calls.

  40. Statitical Reporting. by jellomizer · · Score: 3, Interesting

    Say create a program that manages your logs and you get a statistically significant increase of errors report the server giving the errors. You may want to fudge the statistics a bit to give more priority to Errors and less for warnings.

    Or warn when you servers drive is near filled or something that would require manual action is near.

    --
    If something is so important that you feel the need to post it on the internet... It probably isn't that important.
  41. Re:Wow by NekoXP · · Score: 3, Funny

    Better yet, coca of the month subscription?

  42. Car notifications by Toe,+The · · Score: 4, Interesting

    A message board in your car wouldn't necessarily have to give the finger or otherwise be witty/rude.

    There are times when a rear-pointing message board could be extremely useful. Such as:
    Your high-beams are on.
    Your headlights are off.
    Careful, the driver next to me is drunk.

    And so on.

    However, such signs very well may be illegal in some jurisdictions.

    1. Re:Car notifications by Hognoxious · · Score: 2, Funny

      There are times when a rear-pointing message board could be extremely useful. Such as:
      Your high-beams are on.

      My favourite would be: Ever wondered why they're called fog lights, not it's-a-bit-cold-today lights?

      A bit long, sadly.

      --
      Confucius say, "Find worm in apple - bad. Find half a worm - worse."
    2. Re:Car notifications by stupidllama · · Score: 1

      I'm drunk... Go fuck yourself. or even better. Can i see your boobs?

    3. Re:Car notifications by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      This is what we have CB radios for. Truckers use them quite a bit.

  43. Back car window.. by Paracelcus · · Score: 1

    Hey Einstein, riding my ass won't make me go any faster!

    Tailgaters SUCK!

    --
    I killed da wabbit -Elmer Fudd
    1. Re:Back car window.. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Why should tailgaters have to suck instead of riding your ass?

    2. Re:Back car window.. by GhaleonStrife · · Score: 3, Funny

      "If you're going to ride my ass, at least buy me dinner first!"

    3. Re:Back car window.. by east+coast · · Score: 1

      It won't make you go any faster but it does cut down on their carbon footprint a tad.

      --
      Dedicated Cthulhu Cultist since 4523 BC.
    4. Re:Back car window.. by clone53421 · · Score: 1

      People who drive slowly in the passing lane suck more.

      --
      Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
  44. So you say it plays wav files? by frank_adrian314159 · · Score: 5, Funny

    OK! Useful. Here's what you do...

    The day before you leave on your next vacation, set it up so that it loops the message "I love you!" and then set up the .wav file of Barney the dinosaur singing his "I love you, you love me" theme song. Remove the socket covers from your cube wall and attach the electrical leads that power the device directly to the power lines, covering them with two-inch thick conduit. Then epoxy encapsulate that power connection really well (if the connection happens to be through a wall wart, be sure to conduit and encapsulate those connections as well). Disable any power switch the device might have and leave. When you get back from your vacation, your co-workers will have all either quit or committed suicide and your path to the next level up the corporate chain will be cleared. Repeat as necessary until you are CEO. Take golden parachute and leave. You win!

    --
    That is all.
    1. Re:So you say it plays wav files? by Hierarch · · Score: 1

      The problem comes in when you get back from vacation. You can't be on vacation all the time...

      --
      --Somebody infect me with a .sig virus, I'm too lazy to write my own!
    2. Re:So you say it plays wav files? by thegnu · · Score: 1

      epoxy in a pipe bomb, detonate upon return. problem solved

      --
      Please stop stalking me, bro.
    3. Re:So you say it plays wav files? by gd2shoe · · Score: 1

      ... set it up so that it loops the message "I love you!" and then set up the .wav file of Barney the dinosaur singing his "I love you, you love me" theme song... Then epoxy encapsulate that power connection really well... Disable any power switch the device might have and leave.

      Nice try, but it won't work where I'm employed. We have access to wire cutters. Yes, it will kill the breaker, but it will be worth it!

      --
      I won't join Slashcott. OTOH, If Beta goes live, I just won't be back until it's fixed. Sorry Dice.
    4. Re:So you say it plays wav files? by clone53421 · · Score: 1

      Just carefully cut one strand at a time. Better yet, take a hammer to the sign.

      --
      Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
    5. Re:So you say it plays wav files? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Any speaker, any quality can be fixed with a simple screwdriver. No need to bother the power leads, if there's no magnet attached to the cone.

  45. Re: Speech! by TaoPhoenix · · Score: 1

    How big are those Wav files it supports? To TTS generated speech and play them back. That's way better info density than the led screen.

    --
    My first Journal Entry ever, in 8 years! http://slashdot.org/journal/365947/aphelion-scifi-fantasy-horror-poetry-webzine
  46. Hello IT by bytesex · · Score: 3, Funny

    Have you tried turning it off and on ?

    --
    Religion is what happens when nature strikes and groupthink goes wrong.
  47. Re:Wow by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    No, that's delivered by a UPS guy that keeps talking into his sleeve and hangs around waiting for you to open your package...

  48. Display Tweets by codepunk · · Score: 2, Interesting

    Display tweets from twitter as the come in.

    --


    Got Code?
    1. Re:Display Tweets by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Who in their right mind uses twitter? Ugh...

  49. Automotive uses by oldspewey · · Score: 1

    Mount the thing in the back window of your car, and set it up so that it's preloaded with around a dozen messages that can be displayed as the need arises while you drive.

    My suggestions would be things like:

    "Turn your highbeams off retard"
    "Kindly move out of the fast lane"
    "Next time try signalling"
    "I'm boning your wife"

    --
    If libertarians are so opposed to effective government, why don't they all move to Somalia?
    1. Re:Automotive uses by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      They are not using highbeams, they fuck up their light so they shine more UP than down. Then they add the fucking Xenon in there too.

      Police should stop people, measure their lights and issue tickets for low beams that are aimed too high.

      The best aligned low beams are not in cars and hell not in the damn SUVs. They are in the semi-trucks! I almost never, *ever* see any trucker with wrongly aligned lights.

  50. Details on the particular LED scroller gadget ? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Can the poster add the details of this particular gadget...manufacturer name/part # ?

  51. Use it to monitor a Linux box by __roo · · Score: 2, Interesting

    Take a cue from this post and write a script that uses vmstat and top to alter the scrolling speed and scroll something useful that shows the health of your box. You can cut one of the numbers pumped out by vmstat to set the scroll speed, and maybe grep, head, etc. something useful out of top to show on the screen. I'd write a little suggested script for you right here, but I have no idea what format your device wants its config file.

  52. This is the voice of Colossus by uncledrax · · Score: 1
    --
    ----- The internet has given everyone the ability to have their voice heard equally as loud.. even if they shouldn't be
  53. Put it back into work by j-turkey · · Score: 2, Interesting

    Here are some ideas for dynamically generated messages for use at work. (Assuming that you use a ticketing system at work.) Most of them use database backends that you can connect to using your favorite protocol. Find a useful way to display pertinent information on the display.

    For example, do you have an overdue or high-priority ticket? Program it scroll a reminder. Do you queue tickets and handle them serially? Set it up to display the number of tickets in your queue and the header for the next ticket. Smaller helpdesk where you're responsible for managing systems? Display network metrics from your monitoring system. Managing helpdesk employees? Have it display metrics about your technicians.

    Other fun stuff...if you have a swanky gaming rig at home - you could use it to monitor temperatures (ambient/case/CPU/GPU/Disk, etc). You could also pull CPU, disk, and network stats and display it as a histogram or bar.

    --

    -Turkey

  54. IT depends on what your company does, doesn't it? by itsybitsy · · Score: 1

    Ok, so you can have all the fun things... but something useful?

    Doesn't that depend upon what your company does? Are there stats that you could track? With sound effects when sales are made for example?

    You could hook it into the badge system (if your company has one) so it shows who is arriving and leaving....

    You could hook it into the company stock price if it's a public company.

    You could have it play the news. Boring, unless it's the onion news. Could get you fired though but at least you'd be able to take your display with you.

    Tell us more about your work environment please.

    If it's a workshop you could track accidents; how many fingers lost today...

    Tell us more!

  55. FPS hud by Neotrantor · · Score: 0, Interesting

    you could write a mod to have it display ammo and health on it and have nothing but the game world on your monitor

  56. Use it for Continuous Integration status by SpuriousLogic · · Score: 1

    Hook that sucker up to Hudson (https://hudson.dev.java.net/) and use it to display build/job status.

  57. Put it in your car by Capt.+Skinny · · Score: 1

    Put it in the back window of your car and attach it to a mobile device with a touch screen. You can tell people to get off your ass, or tell off the drivers going 40 in a 55 (on a road with a 65 defacto speed) after you pass them.

  58. some ideas by Sloppy · · Score: 4, Informative

    First of all, look at the kinds of things that people do with lcdproc. One of those might inspire you. It sounds like you're talking about slightly different hardware, but I'd expect it to have similar applications.

    Second: if you are a bad sysadmin (like me) and don't check your logs or statuses very often, and once found that you had run on a degraded software-RAID for several months, then write something that occasionally looks at /proc/mdstat and then says on your display "RAID OK" or "RAID degraded." That's one of the things I use my VFD for.

    --
    As copyright owner of this comment, I authorize everyone to defeat any technological measure which limits access to it.
  59. Inter-car communication system by Thnurg · · Score: 1

    Power it from your in-car supply and you can use it to signal to other drivers.

    Personally I'd use it to send a mirrored message to the car in front:

    "Please turn your damn fog-light off. I can see you perfectly clearly when I'm right behind you."

    --
    The months are just too short. I can count the number of days on one hand.
  60. "XX seconds without thinking about sex." by dlleigh · · Score: 4, Funny

    Kind of like those safety signs at industrial sites that brag about the number of days without an accident.

    Program the display so that the number of seconds continuously counts up, and then resets to zero after a random interval -- say thirty or forty seconds.

    1. Re:"XX seconds without thinking about sex." by RussellSHarris · · Score: 1

      Wire a hidden switch and trigger it at opportune moments (when certain people walk by your cubicle, for instance).

      Or just put it on a motion sensor. *snore*... somebody walks in, "huh? no, I wasn't sleeping..." ("0 seconds without...")

  61. Spam by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    You can use it to print out the incoming spam. After-all, they want you to read it...

  62. 2009: An Office Odyssey by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    On shutdown, have it output the lyrics of "Daisy Bell"

  63. System info by Reibisch · · Score: 1

    This isn't necessarily relevant to your job, but one of my favorite utilities for LCD displays is to report CPU usage by core and allocated/remaining RAM. It's not something that can be easily accessed while doing full-screen stuff and it's ridiculously useful (or maybe just informative).

    1. Re:System info by jibjibjib · · Score: 1

      I once programmed my scroll lock LED to light up when my CPU was at 100% (since, of course, the scroll lock LED basically never gets used for anything much.) That was sort of cool.

  64. X-Files by IronChef · · Score: 5, Funny

    There was an episode of the X-Files where people started seeing messages in digital displays--microwave ovens, watches, radios, etc. I forget the story of that episode, but the messages always urged violence, and something about them made people snap and go berserk.

    If I had one of those displays, I'd have it displaying something mundane and useful like news, but periodically it would flash KILL HIM and YES YOU and KILL THEM ALL and KILL THEM BEFORE THEY KILL YOU.

    But then, I am a sicko.

    1. Re:X-Files by Fallingcow · · Score: 1

      FEED ME A STRAY CAT

    2. Re:X-Files by Card · · Score: 2, Informative

      That's Blood, second season, third episode.
      Synopsis and quotes, including all LED messages.

    3. Re:X-Files by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Yup, but that's also X-Files. One of the two first seasons.

      David

  65. Connect it to the Web by QuietYou · · Score: 2, Interesting

    Connect it to the web and allow anonymous people to send you messages which will be displayed on your device. Here's a website already doing this, maybe it'll give you some ideas:

    http://www.notallmine.net/cam.asp
    http://www.notallmine.net/howdone1.htm

  66. simulator by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Measles, acne, chickenpox, hives, meningitis, herpes, etc.

  67. anonymous coward by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    1.Sell it on eBay.
    2. Wait
    3. Profit

  68. Two words by billcopc · · Score: 1

    ASCII PR0N!

    I dare you...

    --
    -Billco, Fnarg.com
  69. Two words... by jinxidoru · · Score: 2, Interesting

    packet sniffer

  70. virtual bumper sticker by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Put it in the back window of your car and use it as a virtual bumper sticker.

  71. Random memorandums by Orion+Blastar · · Score: 1

    We once at a college computer lab wanted to make random memorandums, Novell Netware messages over the network like:

    Captain Hook "Ahah, Peter Pan, I found you at last!"

    Mickey Mouse "I want more cheddar please."

    Cookie Monster "Cookies! Omm omm omm! I want more cookies."

    and all kinds of fictional characters sending random messages like that to various people as a joke. My supervisor suggested it and I had hooked the DOS interrupt that Netware used to send messages. But our lab manager spoke out against it and the other supervisor who had admin status got upset that we were testing it and set a batch file to tell us to knock it off and repeated the message a hundred times.

    But now that I think about it, it could be a fortune cookie LED with random fortune cookies.

    --
    Remember, Slashdot does not have a -1 disagree moderation, and no, troll, flamebait, and overrated are not substitutes.
  72. This is a job for by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    the athiest quoter!

  73. How about - by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    the number of days since the help desk helped anyone?

  74. The back of your car by busydoingnothing · · Score: 1

    I've always wanted to use a similar device to put in the back window of my car to display messages such as "Please remove your car from my trunk" and other similar messages.

  75. Another use... by Lazyrust · · Score: 1

    Set the flash rate to trigger seizures in photosensitive epileptics in the work place. Watch them get shaken not stirred!

  76. Favorite Bumper Sticker by cayenne8 · · Score: 1

    "Horn broken......watch for finger!!"

    --
    Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.........
  77. chores around house by toppromulan · · Score: 1

    I was considering getting my wife one of these to hang over the kitchen entry to remind her of her to-do list items during the day. Of course, I might ssh in and display I LOVE YOU randomly as well. Ultimately I decided it was not a good Christmas present, as if a hint to do more chores. But, maybe randomly next month!

  78. Use the good parts by Sparr0 · · Score: 2, Interesting

    I would rip it open and use the LED matrices directly with a microcontroller. Vertical scrolling 5x7 text would look so much better, and non-text graphics would be cool too.

  79. I can see it now. by Tatarize · · Score: 1

    The hidden microphone picks up your boss saying "You're going to be there for the meeting" and spookily displays on the screen "Your snow fling tuba hair forte meeting!"

    --

    It is no longer uncommon to be uncommon.
  80. Four words for you by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    FEED ME A CAT

    http://lists.puremagic.com/pipermail/robotgroup/2008-March/008641.html

  81. Bring some liteculture to your cubicle by yelvington · · Score: 1
    1. Re:Bring some liteculture to your cubicle by Crizp · · Score: 1

      How strange that I figured it was Ulysses before even clicking the link :v

      OP, to bamboozle your colleagues let it display the first chapter of Finnegan's Wake or something. Cue "why is that thing saying random strings of words?"

  82. Command prompt by moniker127 · · Score: 1

    Put a little keyboard infront of it, make it relay what you type to the screen, make it a command prompt.

  83. excuse generator by confused+one · · Score: 1

    BOFH style rolling excuse generator. Need an excuse, just look up and read off the display.

  84. Oooh. by Denihil · · Score: 1

    Make it display the text of the most recent 7chan, 4chan, and 99chan's /b/ posts updated realtime. It won't get you fired, i promise!

    --
    WÌÌfÍ--ÍSÌÒÍ...Í...ÌHÌÍfÍÍÍ--ÍÍÍ
  85. Maybe a magic 8-ball type display ... by JoeGee · · Score: 1
    All dealing with tech support:
    • "First, plug in the cord."
    • "Hard drive or system case?"
    • "I heard of that virus five years ago."
    • "Pogo.com is not an approved application."
    • "Yes, it is your fault."
    • "Reboot your computer."
    • "Your password is not 'emily@doodads.org'."
    • "Your user name is not zXd4#7_uUc2."
    • "HyperText Markup Language."
    • "Bill Gates hates you."
    • "Keep looking for the 'any' key."
    • "Bill Gates hates me more."
    • "Call Purchasing and request an abacus."
    • "7"
    • "I suggest one of the new tablets: a pen and paper."
    • "I only golf when the network goes down."
    • "I'll support your home PC when you support my expensive cigar habit."
    • "Try again later."
    --

    Get off my virtual lawn, you damned virtual kids!
  86. I know what you mean, but by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    if they are going slower than you, I don't think you are cutting them off exactly.

    Just because someone does not drive with the same pet theories as you does not mean they are stupid or assholes.

  87. 12:00 by sdsichero · · Score: 5, Funny

    Just have it blink 12:00 repeatedly.

    1. Re:12:00 by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      What a waste of technology!

  88. Speed reading by Okian+Warrior · · Score: 1

    Download the top 80 or so classic masterpieces from Project Gutenberg. Things like Treasure Island, Heidi, Sherlock Holmes, and so on. Books you have not read, and are culturally important.

    Set up the display with fine control over the scrolling speed, so that you can increase or decrease the speed in small increments (say, plus or minus 1% of current speed).

    At night, before bedtime, "read" a novel by scroll sign, while slowly incrementing the speed until you are reading at your mental pace (about 450 WPM) instead of your normal reading pace (about 150 WPM for most people).

    Do this consistently for an hour each night. You will need more than one day to finish any novel.

    After a year, you will have read the top 80 culturally significant written works. Your intelligence (specifically: reading comprehension) will have greatly increased. When you hear a political review that, for example, obliquely references something in Sherlock Holmes, it will make sense. You can speak in terms relating to situations described in these works ("He's taking a Pollyanna view"), and you will have a larger vocabulary.

    Enjoy your new found status and higher pay rate.

    1. Re:Speed reading by Okian+Warrior · · Score: 1

      As it happens, I'm working on a package which does exactly this.

      It's a complete system with the top 68 culturally significant books and a "word flash reader" with a simple selection scheme to choose a book and save your place, &c.

      There are word flash readers on the net already. The important part of my project is that it is a complete system with the books already loaded. A user can download one (rather large) file and begin reading immediately, instead of having to do all the geek stuff required to install a reader and then go off and grab/format the books.

      The purpose is to increase literacy. Someone with poor comprehension could use this to increase their reading speed and comprehension (start slow, build up over time), as well as introduce them to pleasant reading by presenting well-known popular works.

      I'm doing this as a hobby and as time permits (read: extremely slowly). If anyone thinks this is interesting or would like to work on this together, feel free to get in touch.

      Literacy (dot) 9 (dot) OkianWarrior (at) SpamGourmet (dot) com

  89. Which USB/LED message display did you get? by Deep+Penguin · · Score: 1

    I'm curious which one you got and how easy it is to control via the USB port. Someone else here already mentioned LCDproc (which is included in Debian, at least, and is easy to get for other distros and OSes). I'm guessing there isn't already a driver for it, but one of the aims of LCDproc is to make it easy to write drivers for.

    Once you have something like LCDproc talking to your device, it's easy to write client programs in Perl or Python or any language that can open a socket and keep it open and have the client programs do what you want. I have written Perl clients to monitor work processes, keep me updated on current weather conditions, what's playing on xmms, the time of day in multiple timezones, etc.

  90. What display? by laird · · Score: 1

    What model from what manufacturer? The last time I looked, most LED displays had prehistoric or proprietary interfaces, and a display that connects via USB and is easily programmable sounds like a lot of fun.

    There are all sorts of key business metrics to put on such a display, making them more visible to everyone in your company. This is good because it makes people aware of something that they should be thinking about.

    For example:
    - Number of registered users (for a social site or MMORPG, which cares about community size)
    - Number of ad impressions (if that's your revenue model)
    - Number of sales (or dollar amount, etc.) for eCommerce sites
    - Time since last server outage (to get people to focus on uptime)
    - Number of downloads (for an app)

    Or whatever is appropriate for your business/technology.

  91. game of life simulation by fsiefken · · Score: 1

    game of life simulation!

  92. scroll the source code to DeCSS by GeneralTao · · Score: 1

    Hmm? What? What year is this?

    --
    --- Tao
  93. Current test coverage by juletre · · Score: 1

    At work we actually have a LED-matrix showing more or less useful information about our project. (My boss's boss said we could get a flat screen tv, but my boss wanted something tacky)

    Now it runs standard test suites against svn head and displays the result, together with the difference from last test.

    It also says things like : 'Branch maintenence failed, last commiter was userXXX.'

    --
    "he, who has quotes in his signature, is a douche" - unknown.
  94. Got a webcam? by kent_eh · · Score: 1

    You could do something like this.

    --

    ---
    "I can't complain, but sometimes still do..." Joe Walsh
  95. Where can I get one? by Edgester · · Score: 1

    I've been looking for a USB-connected LED display on Thinkgeek, but no luck. I saw the PioLCD, but everything else seems $300+. What other LED/LCD displays are available for under $200 USD and work with Linux?

  96. Usefull, maybe... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Now serving # -32768

  97. One solution by NotPeteMcCabe · · Score: 1
    Take it to the person who designed the building and offer to give it to them if they tell you how high the building is.

    Wait -- what's the question again?

  98. oh dear... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    they sure as hell better take the opportunity when they can safely move over.

    or else what, Mr. Angry Driver?

    1. Re:oh dear... by clone53421 · · Score: 1

      Or else they'd better not complain on here about people cutting around them too closely.

      --
      Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
  99. Tell me how to play with my toys by BitHive · · Score: 1

    Hi Slashdot please tell me how to play with my new toy. Stay tuned for next week's Ask Slashdot where I ask you which of your suggestions is the best.

  100. Countdown by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Bring in some road flares, wire them up with some electrical tape and bell wire. Program the display to countdown random arabic characters while chanting. Do this at random times throughout the day or when someone you like is in your cube/office bothering you.

  101. Try this instead.. by Spikeles · · Score: 1

    Get this and this do a tiny bit of soldering, and tada, you have yourself a 320x240 262K colour OLED display you can use to display whatever you want, from simple characters to full image bitmaps. It's commanded using serial commands that are transferred across the USB and the USB connector has Linux drivers. (Not to mention the display is touch sensitive AND OLED)

    --
    I don't need to test my programs.. I have an error correcting modem.
  102. Advertising by jibjibjib · · Score: 1

    Sell advertising space.

  103. Monitoring system by IGnatius+T+Foobar · · Score: 1

    I've got my display (a very retro looking 1x20 14-segment VFD!) hooked up to our monitoring system. Every alert that goes to the pager goes to my desk as well. If one of our NOC operators fails to respond to an alert, they'd have an awful hard time telling me that they didn't get the page.

    --
    Tired of FB/Google censorship? Visit UNCENSORED!
  104. Get all of your coworkers to donate/code them... by NeuroManson · · Score: 1

    And turn your office building into a giant Virtual Boy display. If LCD Glasses are available, you could even emulate the 3D effect by setting each bar to the right flicker rates.

    --
    Just because you can mod me down, doesn't mean you're right. Shoes for industry!
  105. Exactly! by Grog6 · · Score: 1

    N/T

    --
    Truth isn't Truth - Guliani
  106. /b/tard... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    rule34....

    somebody's a /b/tard.

  107. Binary math quiz: by meatmanek · · Score: 1

    How many bits are in a hexadecimal digit?

    If you think the answer is five, like the author does, you are incorrect.

    1. Re:Binary math quiz: by amorsen · · Score: 1

      Note that the story says 5 hex values, not 5 hex digits. As in, this is one hex value: 0x1F.

      --
      Finally! A year of moderation! Ready for 2019?
  108. Persistence of Vision Display by JuzzFunky · · Score: 1

    I'm not sure how fast the driver board can update the LED's but you might be able to make a cool POV display out of it...

    --
    Unexpect the expected!
  109. If your smart enough by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Pager?

  110. Game of Life by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Not having used this device, I don't know how feasible this is, but a grid of LEDs is screaming to play Conway's Game of Life.

  111. Use time instead of length by KlaymenDK · · Score: 1

    Where I come from (across the pond from you guys), the rule is "keep two driving-seconds distance", which automatically scales distance with speed.

    Plus, you don't have to use rough eye measurements but can, at any time, check the period between the other and yourself passing a sign, lamp post, pot hole, or whatever.

  112. clock by jms1 · · Score: 1

    I have two 2-line 20-character VFD displays, like you'd see on top of a pole on the back of a cash register (in fact it used to be part of a cash register.) I was using one of them as a dual timezone clock for a while. http://www.jms1.net/code/#vfdclock has the code, and a picture of the units, if anybody is interested.

  113. fourtune!!! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    See Title!