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ISS's Node 3 Might Be Named "Colbert"
Panzor writes "NASA is running a contest to name the new addition to the space station, Node 3. The polls are open until March 20. The selection that is getting the most votes is 'Suggest your own,' and the leading name besides the official four (Earthrise, Legacy, Serenity, and Venture) is 'Colbert.' Comedian Stephen Colbert suggested on the air that fans write in his name. On March 5th, his vote count passed that of Xenu and Colbert pronounced himself Scientology's 'Galactic Overlord.'"
Technically, being in space and all, it should be named Alpha Squad 7.
Kwisatz Haderach
Sell the spice to CHOAM
This Mahdi took Shaddam's Throne
He asked for it Tuesday night, the next day it was so.
Colbert cannot be stopped...EVER!
I don't know where people are getting the number of votes from. I see "Colbert" is leading the User Suggestions, but I don't see a vote count anywhere. I see "Serenity" has 85% of the regular votes, but it doesn't say anywhere whether it has more or less votes than Colbert does.
I have no doubt that Colbert can and will (or has!) overtaken everything else, but where are people seeing actual results here?
In the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is kinky.
But I bet he won't be so smug when the reavers come and there's no one to save him.
They should name it the Coulter, since the Node 3 recycles and feeds off of it's own waste products.
I like to place meaningful quotes in my sig, so people will know that I know what meaningful quotes are.
Principal Skinner: All students please proceed immediately to an assembly in the Butthead Memorial Auditorium.
Principal Skinner (to himself): Dammit, I wish we hadn't let the students name that one.
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I don't suppose anyone takes these kinds of things seriously anymore... a LITTLE pride maybe? Funny, yeah. A good idea? Sorry, I don't think so.
Why? Colbert gets to have a module named after him and NASA gets more free publicity then they could ever muster up on their own.
It's win win.
In fact, the contest rules state that the poll is not binding and they'll choose whatever name they like.
Sucks, really.
That doesn't make any sense at all: the Coulter module would have to spread waste products far and wide.
I am officially gone from
Roy Focker: Let's honor our heroes the way they deserve
How is this a bad idea, and how does it show a lack of pride.
Essentially, the entire process was created to generate media attention, otherwise the module would be given a sterile name, or just a number. In an age where NASA seems positively boring they must actively compete with reality TV and myspace/facebook for the attention of the public.
I would be all for naming the module "FUCK" if it would make the public more interested in our space program; and I think Colbert encouraging the public to participate in an entertaining way can do nothing but good things for NASA. It helps make space fun again.
Most societies have used entertainment to help keep important issues in the public interest. Even Rome had it's gladiators to help remind it's citizens that the country was still at war, without them the citizens would have lost interest and stopped backing the expansion.
Seriously? Yes, and why should we be so serious all the time... let history reflect that our generation was both highly productive and capable of good spirited fun.
Sometimes the best solution is to stop wasting time looking for an easy solution.
Slashdot is maintaining it's journalistic integrity, even with the threat faster moving and more distracting spam filled sites like digg and reddit.
Seriously, it's refreshing to know that at least when an article does get published on slashdot it will be newsworthy.
I voted and then it showed a graph with Serenity having 86% of the votes. A screen shot is posted here.
I grant it appears to be a miss leading GUI design on the pole system.
Think Deeply.
Eh, that makes sense for an online poll with write-in. It discourages 4chan et all coming along and flooding the poll suggesting the node should be named something along the lines of "NIGGER COCKS OLOLOL".
These Colbert naming games are funny, until they happen to you.
Now I have to redo all my stationery...
Let me explain it:
Colbert and his show is one big satire on the right-wing and the pompous right-wind media.
One of the most important parts of the satire is letting the fans play along.
When fans vote to put his name on the space station, really they're joining in on the act.
Its kinda like when Spinal Tap actually went on tour. Fans came to see them and did man-on-the-street interviews talking about how they've seen them on the past 12 tours and have been fans of theirs since the '70s, etc.etc., even though the band didn't exist until the '80s.
Colbert, and Colbert fans, are doing the same thing only in the political/media spectrum and throwing it in the face of the right-wing.
$7.95/mo, 200 GB disk, 2TBxfer, MySQL, PHP, RoR.
I'm pretty sure it not being binding is better than them naming the satellite Penis or Stalin.
There's nothing wrong with surfing with Javascript on if you're not using Windows.
Would love to see Rain beat out Colbert.
No it won't. One of the rules of naming such semi-permanent structures is that they're not often named after living people. Colbert is amusing now (though I find him annoying, to be truthful) but what happens if in 5 years he runs over a group of children in a drunk driving incident? Do you really want a NASA module named after that? Is that going to be funny?
There are exceptions, but they're fairly rare and usually involve someone who either: a) invented the thing (Colt revolvers or Ferris Wheels), or; b) donated a tonne of money (anybody remember Enron stadium, or the Ken Lay Chair in Economics at Methodist University?)
Xenu is too religious, and a government agency wouldn't name anything after Scientology.
That's why NASA's suggestions are more benign, and why one of them will likely be chosen.
Besides, the subtlety of the shout-out to the Big Damn Heroes is awesome and not overt enough to eliminate the name.
Skot Nelson music is my saviour / i was maimed by rock and roll
We know where the next "launch failure" is going. Michigan.
It should be noted that Buddy is number 3. And a much cooler name than "Colbert". Or "Xenu" And much better than "Serenity".
Best Slashdot Co
Anybody remember People Magazine's contest for online voting for 'most beautiful person'? Howard Stern urged his listeners to vote for Hank the Angry Drunken Dwarf http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hank_the_Angry_Drunken_Dwarf
In 1998, People magazine ran an online poll to determine the most beautiful people in the world, where somebody facetiously entered Nasiff as a write-in candidate. Nasiff won the contest, receiving hundreds of thousands of votes. At the time the online poll was launched, People led voters to believe that it would influence the print magazine's annual listing of "the most beautiful people." People refused to allow online votes to influence the magazine results. The poll was configured so that users could vote multiple times, by deleting a cookie given from the site. Many contestants had scripts written that would allow users to vote repeatedly.
Actual working link to NASA's poll page (the one in the summary isn't one):
http://www.nasa.gov/externalflash/name_ISS/index.html
I for one welcome our new Galactic Overlord.
he's not even that funny. ah well - they'll toss the results and name it whatever they want.
to each their own, humour is a matter of personal taste.
But he is a truly a nerd. his enthusiasm for comics, sci-fi, lord of the rings... etc, is genuine. And it always cracks me up when he makes a D&D reference.
They'll name it Serenity, since that's the "real" option with all the votes. I'm sure Colbert will be pissed when he finds out that he was beaten by a pack of rabid Joss Whedon fans :)
Man is the animal that laughs.
And occasionally whores for Karma.
Eh, that makes sense for an online poll with write-in. It discourages 4chan et all coming along and flooding the poll suggesting the node should be named something along the lines of "NIGGER COCKS OLOLOL".
The actual *chan hive-mind selection for this contest is "Battletoad"
More Twoson than Cupertino
Sure there is- in the past, there have been plenty of exploits that tap into Firefox caches, saved passwords, history, and system settings (where all your personal information is really kept these days)
Then there's all the XSS, CSRF, and clickjacking exploits that can compromise websites and services
Let's not forget the fact that Javascript can just be annoying- preventing loops of popup windows and alert boxes is reason enough to disable javascript
"The cup is in turn designed for holding hot or cold liquids, and has an open rim and closed base." --US Patent #5425497
Now that I know that there a bunch of "liberals" pushing Colbert... I'm going to set out and build a script for my right buddies to get it named after one of America's greatest Presidents....
In fact, we should even introduce legislation to rename the WHOLE space stations...
The Richard Nixon Space Station.
Man, that WOULD be the most expensive troll in the history of the world.
This is my sig.
In fact, the contest rules state that the poll is not binding and they'll choose whatever name they like. Sucks, really.
Tell me about it. My alma matter had the same rules when it voted for a new mascot. Nobody ended up happy.
Jump'n Jesuits baby!
One of our competitors trademarked the term "hypothesis". From now on, we will call them "boneheaded ideas".
Comment removed based on user account deletion
Let me explain it:
The jokes not as funny if you explain it.
Actually, the name "Xenu" was pushed to the top by 4chan...
I would be all for naming the module "FUCK" if it would make the public more interested in our space program...
Our space program should elevate the public's interests, not degrade itself to grab their attention. I, for one, would be much happier working to build the "Serenity" than the "Colbert".
I &%@!$%! hate Pod 6!
Also, Coulter is an anorexic. The ISS modules are portly and rounded.
Naming it the "Limbaugh" would be a better fit based on physical attributes. Besides, it's mostly men inside it. That fits with naming it "Limbaugh" too.
...and then when it was pushed back off, Anonymous declared War on Colbert:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QJc4V4oKURM
Trolls trolling trolls, it's all good fun.
That's how we normally vote in this country, have you forgotten already?
Yeah. What could possibly be worse? 'Wagon Train' to the stars, maybe?
Real Daleks don't climb stairs - they level the building.
Colbert, and Colbert fans, are doing the same thing only in the political/media spectrum and throwing it in the face of the right-wing.
And that's why NASA would be wise to not name the node after him, just as they would be wise not to name the node "O'Reilly" or "Limbaugh" or what have you.
I thought those guys hated Scientology.
I read the internet for the articles.
He also looks good in a Ming The Merciless cloak (this is the clip in which he declares himself the new Galactic Overlord):
http://www.videosift.com/video/Stephen-Becomes-Scientology-s-Galactic-Overlord
Your "sad statment" is indicative that you're a humorless twat.
You better watch out, there may be dogs about . .
Just voted for "Stewart".
All hope abandon ye who enter here.
Are you accepting pre-orders yet for Battletoads?
I would actually prefer Battletoad over Xenu or Vista... but hey maybe I'm just biased against cults and unsuccessful operating systems and am not caught up on the nuances of what precisely a "battletoad" is.
What I don't get is why anyone would lobby hard to name a space station module after a space ship. I could see naming the next generation launch vehicle Serenity, but a module on a space station? Meh.
The last time this happened, a whole bunch of people lobbied NASA to have a space shuttle named after the Enterprise. What they got was the practice shuttle, that never actually flew in space. I would think it would be more memorable if they lobbied to get an actual shuttle that flew missions named after their favorite ship. Although, in retrospect, that shuttle will probably be seen by many more people than the actual shuttles since it is now sitting in the Udvar-Hazey center at Dulles (or, the Uday-Qusay center as my father affectionately calls it). So maybe it was worth it.
Gentlemen! You can't fight in here, this is the war room!
They should name the Bigelow Aerospace stuff "Limbaugh" since it's just a big bag of air.
Fascism starts when the efficiency of the government becomes more important than the rights of the people.
This isn't really "news" considering it had been broadcast even before it happened. Never the less, you can watch the two episodes here ->
http://www.hulu.com/watch/60651/the-colbert-report-tue-mar-3-2009
http://www.hulu.com/watch/60861/the-colbert-report-wed-mar-4-2009
In Scientology, Xenu is the bad buy.
I traded all my mod points for these magic beans.
I'm a big fan of Colbert, but some of the other write-in suggestions are even better:
* Buddy
* Synergy
* Vista (!)
* Social Vibe
I, for one, am writing in "Slashdot".
Wow, really? "Serenity" is just as much of a joke as "Colbert" is - the only difference is the Colbert option isn't intended to be serious. "Serenity" would be the ultimate nerd cheese choice and I say this as someone who enjoyed Firefly.
- Toby
is way cooler.
^[:q!
Don't feed the AC trolls. We all know space western is one of the most interesting and under-used genres - Cowboy Bebop anyone?
Nick
Scientology traditionally liked to keep the details of its backstory secret from the public, so an action that causes increased exposure of the word "xenu" can be considered anti-scientology.
Battletoads is a video game created by Rare Ltd. to rival the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles games.
Two anthropomorphic toads named after skin disorders (Rash and Zitz) have to save their friends Pimple and the Princess Angelica from the Dark Queen, ruler of Planet Ragnarok, with the assistance of Professor T. Bird and his space ship, The Vulture.
It is also the game eBaum's World asks for when they call GameStop because douchy (actually made with vinegar and water!) Eric Bauman thought it was funny about 9000 years ago.
Vote for Zaphod!
Satan is wildly more plausible though.
You take things too seriously. People like you ruin everything good.
From the rules on the site:
NASA will take into consideration the results of the voting. However, the results are not binding on NASA and NASA reserves the right to ultimately select a name in accordance with the best interests of the agency, its needs, and other considerations. Such name may not necessarily be one which is on the list of voted-on candidate names. NASA's decision shall be deemed final.
Its kinda like when Spinal Tap actually went on tour. Fans came to see them and did man-on-the-street interviews talking about how they've seen them on the past 12 tours and have been fans of theirs since the '70s, etc.etc., even though the band didn't exist until the '80s.
And many of these Spinal Tap "fans" bood the opening act off the stage. And just who was the opening act? The Folksmen. If you've seen the movie A Mighty Wind, you know that the Folksmen are none other than Spinal Tap with different costumes and different music.
Very clever of the boys.
I remember long ago watching BraveStarr on Saturday mornings. Something you don't see often - a guy with a super power he never uses because he has a machine that does it better. Strength of the Bear, Ears of the Wolf, Speed of the Puma, and an infrared scanner thing in my hat...
Real Daleks don't climb stairs - they level the building.
They do. But remember that Xenu is the arch-nemesis of the story. It's like rooting for Emperor Palpatine in the Jedi religion or Satan in the Judeo-Christian religions. The easist way to troll a group is to root for the Big Bad.
It is a good joke, if taken in fun. The real joke is that this democratic system, in a slightly more elaborate, slightly more bot-resistant way, is basically how we elect our Presidents.
When I first glanced at the name, I saw Dilbert. Not sure if it's fitting, but the living spaces up there must be the side of cubicles or smaller. :)
First he vandalizes Wikipedia, then he pisses off the Browncoats...
If Colbert doesn't clean up his act, the internets will be taking revenge soon! :P
If anyone needs me I'll be in the Angry Dome!
To be honest, the space program hasn't been relevant for about 15 years. Money spent on them could be spent elsewhere for a bigger gain.
Why does it suck?
Do you believe that if someone else works on something very hard and puts a lot of time and money into it (something which you have put no time or effort into at all) and then takes the time to ask for your opinion on some small aspect, that your opinion should be somehow binding? That they are being rude, or even cheating you by not committing themselves to your whims?
Good luck with that.
Don't let that sick bastard win. D: Vote Xenu!
Actually, they probably stole the idea of being their own opening act from Hot Rize, who for 30 years changed costumes and instruments and came out as "Red Knuckles and the Trailblazers", parodying themselves as a Country and Western Band.
I've abandoned my search for truth; now I'm just looking for some useful delusions.
Really. In the joke sense, "Serenity" has some positive connotations, and they're space-related. It's certainly no worse than "Enterprise". In the plain vanilla sense, "Serenity" is a reasonably nice word that will probably get spelled correctly more often than "Endeavour".
Reminds me of a funny gag they pulled up here in Canada.
A number of years ago there was a douchebag conservative politician running for Prime Minister.
One of his stupid kooky ideas was if ever 10% of the population wanted a referendum they would have it.
So the comedy news up here (This hour has 22 minutes) started an online poll.
Anyway long story short the poll was to have a referendum to change the politicians name from "Stockwell Day" to "Doris Day".
It got over 400,000 people to sign up saying yet they would like him to change his name to Doris.
While he didn't win then, he is now our Minister of International Trade... god save us all.
Unless.. Colbert simultaneously renames himself "Node 3". But I guess that's about as likely as Illinois renaming itself to "Pluto".
n/t
About your sig..
Did you actually look at the patent description?
US Patent #5425497 is about an invention of a new type of cup-holder that takes up less volume.
http://patft.uspto.gov/netacgi/nph-Parser?Sect1=PTO1&Sect2=HITOFF&d=PALL&p=1&u=%2Fnetahtml%2FPTO%2Fsrchnum.htm&r=1&f=G&l=50&s1=5425497.PN.&OS=PN/5425497&RS=PN/5425497
The sig would be funny had it actually been true.
If you need a list of silly patents to come up with a better sig, go here: http://www.patentlysilly.com/archives.php
Battletoad is fine for me. In fact, that even surpasses my own submission, "Helluvaview"
Squire Toad
I could argue that it's irrelevance is, at least in part, due to its lack of public attention. If the public were more interested in what NASA did, it would do more or lose funding. Instead it has lost funding, simply because people don't care enough to encourage them to take risks.
If you look at all of the large funding projects NASA has ever done, they have always been highly risky and had high public interest (not necessarily support). I can think of few things that NASA has done in my memory that have been all that exciting. I remember the challenger explosion, and several other mishaps making the news, but otherwise they have always seemed like just another boring government agency that can't do anything exciting... not the NASA my parents remember.
NASA of the 50's and 60's was a very aggressive organization, mostly because the public demanded it of them. The people wanted to see, and would pay for, some very risky and exciting projects. Lets go to space, lets land on the moon, lets create a reusable launch vehicle, and so on. Hell, NASA today can't even build a replacement for the space shuttle because the public doesn't care enough and they don't know how to take chances anymore.
I think that a leaner, meaner NASA is better than leaving it to public industry. The public space industry is about to die a painful death with the collapse of the "money on trees" economy that we are recovering from. The only reason any of these companies got off the ground (pun intended) is that there was an extremely loose investing environment. Everything was making money, and no investment was bad. Now that people have been reminded that investing should be done with some caution, I expect that many of these space startups will have a hard time funding themselves until they can create a new market for their product.
NASA simply needs to be greatly changed to make it more adventurous and aggressive and far less burdened with bureaucracy.
Sometimes the best solution is to stop wasting time looking for an easy solution.
I would have loved to see the space station named after Xenu, then we'd just have someone "leak" information to the press that NASA has been infiltrated by Scientoligists, and the entire federal government could (yet again) be compromised by Scientologists.
In that case, I submit "Obama".
and just wednesday, Spinal Tap went and announced another tour :D
http://idle.slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=09/03/05/1517213
It's actually an even bigger troll than that.
Lucasfilm isn't suing people who reveal that Emperor Palpatine is the big bad in the Jedi religion, and the various churches aren't suing people who reveal that Satan is the big bad in the various Judeo-Christian religions. (In the latter case, they actually PROMOTE revealing that fact for free.)
The Co$ is suing people who reveal that Xenu is the big bad in Scientology, and requires hundreds of thousands of dollars to get to the point in the "religion" that you find that out.
That is why it's such a troll - if something like that is named after Scientology's big bad...
The fact that you took umbrage at a comment not directed at you also gives us clues to your level of "funny-bone".
Most importantly, however - the "humorless twat" was directed at him because he thinks that a comedian's antics should be any sort of reflection on our society. It isn't. He's maybe in the role of court jester, speaking truth to power. But more likely he's just playing up a grandiose egomaniac of a character that stops at nothing to get his name mentioned. Taking it too seriously and ascribing it social significance is indicative of a humorless twat.
You better watch out, there may be dogs about . .
In the end, Illinois will have the final vote...
The new ISS module shall be named for the glorious Hypnotoad
"Fights begin, finger prints er' took, days are lost, bail is made, court dates are ignored, cycle is repeated."
"Scilons" ?? ...were created by man. Er, wait, this isn't BSG....
The thing is, I'm torn. I'm a rabid Joss Whedon fan (at least Firefly), and I'm also a reasonably rabid Colbert fan.
You've got it all wrong...
*bzbzbzbzbzbz*
ALL HAIL THE HYPNOTOAD!
*bzbzbzbzbzbz*
And "Enterprise" is any different?
Personally, I like both of them. I think you'll find a lot of very talented folks who really make this stuff happen have been influenced over the years by the creative folks who create scifi. Neither Gene Roddenberry nor Joss Whedon could engineer a space vessel any more than I could, but creative individuals like them almost certainly inspired some of those that *could* do the job.
As is Jesus--he, at least, was not a science fiction author!
If the Spirit and Opportunity rovers had middle fingers, they would be extended right now.
Xenon, where's my money? -Borno
Let's not make yours the second one!
Hopefully, NASA will show a sense of humour and name it Colbert. But with the pronunciation 'coal-bert'.
Promoting popular interest in science arguably has value. Many people don't know nor care about the ISS, but this can correct a bit of that apathy. Public awareness is rarely a bad thing, especially in the case of science that's funded by the government using their tax dollars.
And besides, many people in science enjoy Colbert just as much as everyone else does.
He has had plenty of scientists on his show before (certainly more than most TV shows have on as guests).
As probably 15 people have mentioned before me, the only names that can be voted on are Earthrise, Legacy, Serenity and Venture. And it's groanworthy (as some who hasn't watched Firefly) that Serenity has 86% of the vote because of its connection to Firefly.
It's a bit like when an American school allowed the students to pick the name of the school and chose Springfield Elementary.
Yeah, we get it. Sometimes though you have to wonder if there is much difference between pretending to be in a cult for 'ironic' reasons and actually being in a cult.
echo -e 'global _start\n _start:\n mov eax, 2\n int 80h\n jmp _start' > a.asm; nasm a.asm -f elf; ld a.o -o a;
So far, so good...
bork bork bork!
As opposed to ALL OTHER JOKES, which get MUCH FUNNIER after being explained.
Slashdot gets worse every day... Pipedot: News for nerds, without the corporate slant
As someone mentioned earlier, this is a horrible idea. Colbert is a guy with decent ratings on a tv show right now. What happens if he goes persona non grata?
You justify it as a great PR concept because you probably like Colbert. It's ok, I laughed at the first three episodes too. But if it was someone from American Idol you'd think it was awful... and let's face it, that would probably get a lot more people involved.
It's not an attack against a show you like, it's just a bad idea and I wish people would think about things like that a little more seriously.
good one
After reading the NASA description of the contents of the module, I think 'PeePod' is probably about right.
I have written in my vote to name it 'Hitler' so many times that I'm tired of licking the stamps.
“Common sense is not so common.” — Voltaire
They do. Scientology hates public mention of Xenu since it undermines what little credibility they've got left.
$ make available