Railway Workers Get Daily Smile Scans

More than 500 workers at Japan's, Keihin Electric Express Railway, must have their faces scanned each morning to determine their optimum smile. The "smile scan" analyzes a smile based on facial characteristics, from lip curves and eye movements to wrinkles. After the program scans you, it produces a smile rating that ranges from zero to 100 depending on the estimated potential of your biggest smile. If your number is sufficient, you can go about your day grinning like a maniac. If your smile number is too low the computer will give you a message such as, "lift up your mouth corners" or "you still look too serious." Every morning employees receive a printout of their daily smile which they are expected to keep with them throughout the day.

Comments

Japan is insane.

[Trinexx]

What the hell is wrong with the Japanese? What practical purpose does this serve?

Re:Japan is insane.

[dyingtolive]

I agree entirely. At the same time, this scares me. What if they start demanding you report to the attitude modification center for your antidepressants because you're not smiling all day long? This especially bugs me because I'm not a smilier and I like being bitter, damnit!

Re:Japan is insane.

[furby076]

I agree with you. Japan comes out with some crazy ass shit. I can understand having gym in the morning (though to be honest, if I am wearing a suit why would you want me to sweat in the AM and have to wear it all day). At least the gym gets your metabolism working. This is just stupid. Japan comes out with some whacky shit. I think someone's been eating som bad sushi.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Lumpy]

To demean and control your workers. That is the ONLY use.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

Dude. We already proved you can legislate morality. As if you didn't know emotion was next!

Re:Japan is insane.

[sesshomaru]

There was an old Dr. Who episode called "The Happiness Patrol," non-smilers would be drowned in syrup.

Also, in the Simpsons Time Travel Tree House of Horror episode, the Ned Flanders world had mandatory smiling enforced by hooks, and if that didn't sort out the Negative Nellies, then there was the option of a total frontal lobotomy. "And they let you keep the piece of brain they cut out," as Moe says.

Also, I present this video.

Kawaii!

Re:Japan is insane.

[Shadow of Eternity]

Gym uniform, showers.

That aside I think we've discovered one of the reasons their suicide rate is so high.

Re:Japan is insane.

[mordenkhai]

From the article, it looks like they are a service company, not a railway builder. So, from what I have heard, the Japanese haven't smiled like Americans traditionally do. This system is like daily training on smiling for customers. Very odd, but I guess if they want smiling employees they have to teach them how?

Re:Japan is insane.

[jellomizer]

Simple, if you smile and pretend to be happy, you actually become more happy. When you are happy annoying people are less annoying and allows you to do service work more effectively.

If you fly a lot compare Southwest with American Air.

Southwest people are trained to smile and be cheerful. American Air doesn't.

Southwest has less delays and is more profitable and the passagers are better behaved and quiet and cuterious of others.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

No more insane than many places, just more technical. I can get a look at this kind stuff in Silicon Valley by walking in to any Safeway store. All they lack (I think) is the scanner.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

Or worse they will attach devices to their head and make them grin and sing all day long like this! Happy Head Device

Re:Japan is insane.

[Presto Vivace]

I am so glad I don't work there.

Re:Japan is insane.

[HappyHead]

Happiness is mandatory citizen! Smile, and move along.

Re:Japan is insane.

[JWSmythe]

    It's the same thing that TGIBennaChilies does. Make sure you have a smile, talk warm and friendly, and oh dear god make sure you're wearing enough flair. :)

    First thing in the morning, don't expect a smile on my face, unless I was up all night the night before, and had a morning quickie before leaving the house. Even then, I've never had a job that made me want to smile in the morning. Work is work, it's not to be freakin' enjoyed.

    I prefer that work ethic. I don't need shiny happy people asking how they can help me. I need someone to answer my question correctly in only as many works as required. No, there's nothing else they can help me with. I don't care that your name is Melissa or Steve or Joanne, I can read your nametag just like any other literate customer. If I need something else, I'm not going to hunt you down, I'm going to ask the sales person who's closest. And no, I don't want to supersize it, and I don't care that it's only 35 cents more.

    I went in a store today to buy cigarettes. There's a really cute girl working the counter. Eye candy goes a long way. :) I asked for a carton of cigarettes. She said they only have 9 packs. I said that would be fine, and she gave me my total. I paid, and was out the door in less than a minute. *THAT* is what I want. If I wanted warm and friendly, I'd go play with a cat. If I want a girl to flirt with me and blow smoke up my ass, I'd go see an escort. I'd say my wife, but any married man knows, once the ring goes on the finger, friendliness and complements are gone, unless she wants something. The friendlier she is, the more expensive the thing she wants.

Re:Japan is insane.

[ShieldW0lf]

It's true. That's why when you take a sales job you have to get in a circle at 7 am and do the big "ra ra ra" thing. It allows you to be contagiously happy and make money. It's pretty commonplace in workplaces all over the world. The only difference is, the Japanese don't have enough population to be able to make ends meet, so they've created a robot to fill the role that would otherwise be filled by your "team leader".

Did you know Sadness is and has always been one of the seven deadly sins? Nowadays, they call it "Sloth".

Re:Japan is insane.

[Ohio Calvinist]

While it is kind of creepy, having worked in Technical Support, I found that when I made myself smile, even when I was furiously angry or irritated, it helped me "be" more friendly and attentive to my callers, than when I frowned, or wrapped my phone cord around my neck like a noose, etc...

When you are in customer service, it makes a huge difference, and belive it or not, it often makes a huge difference to customers who expect that you don't care about them and are just jockeying the time clock. Perception is everything.

However, rather than doing this, it might be better to just talk to the employee if you see them routinely looking like they ate a lemon.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Kompressor]

I will never look at a bunny the same way again...

**shudders**

Re:Japan is insane.

[ardor]

So, shall we nominate you the head of the new Citizen Morality Correction Center? Or do you prefer leading the Citizen Behavior Optimization Section instead? Hey, how about constantly monitoring everybody's mood, so nobody dares to be unhappy! Yes, that sounds great!

Re:Japan is insane.

[ShieldW0lf]

Work is work, it's not to be freakin' enjoyed.

I have a label for people who have that attitude about life. It's "WHORE".

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

...and I like being bitter, damnit! ...not after the treatment.

Re:Japan is insane.

[hcs_$reboot]

What the hell is wrong with the Japanese? What practical purpose does this serve?

I do not agree. A big difference between Japan and the West is that Japanese do not live/feel this like a constraint. And a guy won't be fired because "he cannot smile". There are many other similar aspects of the Japanese companies that would be hard to understand West side. This one is certainly humorous and original, thus it was publicized.

Re:Japan is insane.

[tsalmark]

Walmart greeters are US, and have similar, if less formal requirements.

Re:Japan is insane.

[damien_kane]

Did you know Sadness is and has always been one of the seven deadly sins? Nowadays, they call it "Sloth".

Sloth isn't sadness. It's laziness.
Eternal sadness can be viewed as the reward for following the path of the sins, just as eternal happiness is the reward for pursuing the 7 virtues.

Re:Japan is insane.

[ByOhTek]

They obviously need to provide more Bouncy Bubbly Beverage and Cold Fun for desert after lunch.

Re:Japan is insane.

[betterunixthanunix]

This seems to be common on commuter railroads and subways. In New York City, the MTA has an entire "discipline department," whose job is the creation and enforcement of rules -- the rulebook is as thick as several of my engineering textbooks stacked on top of each other, and concerns everything from legitimate safety issues (employees cannot be intoxicated while on the job) to absurdities (procedures and times allotted for bathroom breaks, approved travel times when summoned for random drug tests, approved procedures for filing reports on infractions committed by other employees, etc.). It is also impossible for an employee to break any single rule, as one of the rules is "employees shall follow all the rules" and another is "employees shall be aware of all the rules." I am told that a typical disciplinary hearing involves 4-6 infractions, each of which is listed separately in the employee's work history if they are found to be in violation of the rules.

Re:Japan is insane.

[StellarFury]

I agree. I'm sick of walking into stores and not being able to just look for a thing without being asked "Is there something I can help you with, sir?" The worst is RadioShack - I seriously don't go there anymore because spending two minutes comparing one device or cable against another must be seen by the employees as a sign of incompetence, and they MUST help you with your problem because only THEY, with their great RADIOSHACK training have the answer.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

As insane as it may seem, being serviced by staff with an happy smile may really make your day a better day and reduce stress for a lot of people.
If you've been in japan you understand.

Re:Japan is insane.

[digitig]

Over here if you smile all day at work they test you for pot.

Re:Japan is insane.

[scottishfae]

This probably serves the same purpose as businessmen taking "smiling classes." From what I've heard, the Japanese are trying to fight a long-standing tradition of not-smiling ("control of emotions," etc) by having people be taught how to smile, and how to smile in a way that will appeal to people outside of Japan. The concept of this is that they'll be able to connect with foreign businessmen easier, and not seem so stand-offish. If I had to make a guess of why this was being done to railway workers, then I would assume it was something similar.

Re:Japan is insane.

[ShieldW0lf]

It was originally called Acedia. It's an ancient Greek word describing a state of listlessness or torpor.

This was subdivided into Despair (Latin, Tristitia) and Sloth (Latin, Socordia)

It wasn't until around the 17th century that the interpretation of laziness became dominant. It was intended to refer to a sadness and depression that kills the charitable nature of a mans soul, cutting him off from the possibility of redemption.

Nowadays, we label it "mental illness".

Re:Japan is insane.

[spire3661]

    First thing in the morning, don't expect a smile on my face, unless I was up all night the night before, and had a morning quickie before leaving the house. Even then, I've never had a job that made me want to smile in the morning. Work is work, it's not to be freakin' enjoyed.

    I prefer that work ethic. I don't need shiny happy people asking how they can help me. I'd say my wife, but any married man knows, once the ring goes on the finger, friendliness and complements are gone, unless she wants something. The friendlier she is, the more expensive the thing she wants.

I feel sad that you think this is a normal life. If you are serious, so am I.

Re:Japan is insane.

[morgan_greywolf]

Just because you're Paranoid doesn't mean they're not all out to get you.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

I fall more inbetween the two extremes. I'm not about to smile in the morning, but I enjoy work, and enjoy the people AT work.

Why not smile in the morning? Because I just woke up a bit ago, and my body is still bitching at me about wanting to crawl back into bed. Once that goes away an hour or so later, it's clear sailing.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Xtravar]

My only Southwest experience as of late was a 3 hour flight to Dallas, and we had to stop in Oklahoma City because the pilot realized we didn't have enough fuel. What.the.fuck? Around here they're considered pretty crappy.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

But at least railway workers still serve a purpose. Walmart greeters just annoy the people standing in line at the registers. Why is that idiot standing at the door greeting people when he should be over here taking my money so I can get out of this hellhole?

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

Smiling actually changes your tone of voice. People may not pick up on it on a conscious level, but they do, even just over the telephone.

Re:Japan is insane.

[alen]

MTA workers are in a union and you have to have all these rules since the union wants there to be a good reason to fire anyone. where i work there is a 30 page book where half of each page is empty

Re:Japan is insane.

[sopssa]

And it's only crazy to you because you haven't lived their culture, history or know how japanese people have grown to think along the hundreds of years. I'm actually quite happy that theres still diverse in cultures, specially because USA and Europe seems to be getting so much like the other one. Your attitude shows the typical american attitude -- if its not like us, its bad or weird.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

What the hell is wrong with the Japanese? What practical purpose does this serve?

It seems odd to us, but part of it is a cultural thing.

We've all see the videos of morning stretches or exercises in Japanese companies, and giggled at the guys in the Godzilla preparedness safety gear at a job-site. They have a fairly well-developed sense of being a "team player", as well as how you act in public.

I heard it described best as something like: in a country with absolutely no natural resources, the only resource you have is people, and being the absolute best at what you do.

This sounds more like a version of Omote "Omote refers to the image which an individual, a company, or any institution
wishes to present to outsiders or the public in general. As with any image, omote
is composed of a mixture of reality, myth, and lie."

This has more to do with etiquette in Japan than the creepy weird thing we in North America think of when we read this.

The built in tendency to put on a public face that may mask what you're really thinking is a fairly well entrenched cultural thing for the Japanese.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Oswald]

Actually, Sunshine, the ring effect is probably indirect. I'm guessing (just guessing!) that as the relationship got to the set-in-stone phase -- perhaps shortly after the honeymoon was over? -- your true nature began to assert itself. Your wife, I imagine, is just doing the best she can to deal with the horrible mistake she made. She'll be friendly and cheerful again when she finally faces the truth that things are never getting better and ditches you.

I've been married for 18 years. My wife still says nice things about me to my face and to our children all the time. She is independent enough not to have to "want something" from me -- she can do and get things for herself. We're both glad we didn't marry someone as congenitally cranky as you.

Now stop insulting women in general and your wife in particular. It's rude.

Re:Japan is insane.

[The Grim Reefer2]

What if they start demanding you report to the attitude modification center for your antidepressants because you're not smiling all day long? This especially bugs me because I'm not a smilier and I like being bitter, damnit!

I hear that John Preston is good at making sure people take their meds...

...And he can take care of all those smiley people as well. It's a twofer.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

No, it's not the only use. Smiling actually makes you feel happy, you might want to try it sometime. Also, is this really any worse than drug tests? Personally, given the choice, I'd rather work for a company that did smile tests over one that did drug tests. And no, I don't do drugs.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Kiaser Zohsay]

I, for one, welcome our new happiness enforcing overlords.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

So basically it would fit right in with corporate policy at Fry's where (I swear to $DEITY) they made us cheer out the name of the company in the morning before the store opened. No seriously.

I got a lot of stern talking-tos for being immune to the infectious stupidity of the practice by not participating. Good thing I got the fuck out of retail as soon as I could. Between the beat down policy and management tried to deal, and the hatred endured by customers who obviously felt like "Heeeey! The workers here are somebody lower than ME! FINALLY!" I was about to put a bullet in a lot of people and myself.

Retail and service sector jobs are really bad for anyone with an IQ over 80, healthy self-esteem, or a decent education.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Achromatic1978]

Granted, that's not a great thing. But would you rather the pilot did NOT realize there was insufficient fuel?

Re:Japan is insane.

[pnuema]

The computer is your friend!

Re:Japan is insane.

[FishWithAHammer]

Well said. I kind of feel bad for that bitter little man.

Re:Japan is insane.

[sesshomaru]

"Now, you might ask," said the greasy salesman at the Radio Shack sales meeting I had to attend when I worked there, "Why is a customer going to buy a service plan that costs more than the cheap pair of headphones he is buying? Well, you tell him that when he comes back to the store with that service plan, he'll be a king. He'll be able to replace them no questions asked."

"Anyway, the point is you need to be creative and get your extended service plan sales up..."

Re:Japan is insane.

[sopssa]

Its not because they dont have enough population, Japan is one of the countries that have huge amount of people living in a small area. It's because Japanese people rely *a lot* on technology and robots and such. For example, when you go visit in a hotel there's a robot where you put your glass and it fills it with beer. During the fill when the beer's foam starts to come over, it waits till its gone and then fills more beer into glass so its full. Now how cool is that and rather than geek gadget, its commonplace :)

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

This is just stupid. Japan comes out with some whacky shit.

Not everything that happens in a different cultural is stupid or bad.

It's different, and while it may seem loopy to you, it makes perfect sense within Japanese society.

Try not to think you have all of the answers; you may have not even grasped all of the questions.

Re:Japan is insane.

[master5o1]

Yeah, they even got the quote wrong:

If your smile number is too low the computer will give you a message such as, "lift up your mouth corners" or "why so serious?".

fix'd

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

Part of this may also be that commuter railroads and subways tend to be heavily unionized. It's near impossible to fire union workers no matter how lazy or inept they are because the union will fight tooth and nail to keep the person. A guy hops off the line to go to the bathroom and wanders back 45 minutes later. He was in the bathroom the whole time reading a magazine, having a cup of coffee and smoking a cigarette. He gets a reprimand but the union fights it saying there's no rule about how long he could be in there. Answer, make a rule so the next time the union rep can't get the lazy bum off so easily. Lather, rinse, repeat for 40 or 50 years and you end up with an incredibly stupid and colossal set of rules.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

You sure have not met my wife. The bigger the ticket the steeper the decline in friendliness and warmth. I think it's called reverse psychology. I gave up caring, so it does not affect me any longer.

Re:Japan is insane.

[owlnation]

When you are in customer service, it makes a huge difference, and belive it or not, it often makes a huge difference to customers who expect that you don't care about them and are just jockeying the time clock. Perception is everything.

No. I do not believe this. I want empathy from customer service employees. If I'm having a real problem, and some cretin is smiling at me, all that will happen is that I will be tempted to punch the smile off their face.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Chris Mattern]

absurdities (procedures and times allotted for bathroom breaks, approved travel times when summoned for random drug tests, approved procedures for filing reports on infractions committed by other employees, etc.)

I might note that some of these are not so absurd, particularly when dealing with union labor. Procedurees and times allotted for bathroom breaks? When it is necessary that a station be properly manned at all times, you can't have everybody heading to the can at the same time. Approved travel time when summoned for a drug test? Well, yeah. If you can take two hours, it becomes much easier to set up arrangements to cheat. Why not just use common sense for these problems? 'Cause with union labor, you can't. You have to be able to point to a specific rule that states in some measurable quantity what the employee did wrong. So specific rules like these have to be set up.

Re:Japan is insane.

[snl2587]

Your attitude shows the typical american attitude -- if its not like us, its bad or weird.

Or, really, just the natural human response...which is not exclusive to Americans.

Re:Japan is insane.

[jeffshoaf]

Smile when you say that!

Re:Japan is insane.

[Jah-Wren Ryel]

MTA workers are in a union and you have to have all these rules since the union wants there to be a good reason to fire anyone. where i work there is a 30 page book where half of each page is empty.

So they can write in a reason to fire someone?

Re:Japan is insane.

[DNS-and-BIND]

What a dumbass! The pilot should have continued to Dallas so that you didn't experience any delay. Heck, it's not like there are things like unexpected headwinds or air traffic diversions.

Southwest doesn't compete with other airlines, they compete with Greyhound - it's a totally different market segment. I mean, they don't even have first class or even business class seats, it's egalitarian. They are consistently ranked at the top for safety, on-time performance, customer satisfaction, luggage handling, you name it. The egalitarian nature of their business annoys a lot of people who demand a wall between themselves and "lesser humans." Heck, that's why business and first class exist, really - it's not for the extra comfort, it's getting the hell away from fellow Americans.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

I don't think Americans have anything to do with "natural humans".

But what's wrong with anti-depressants - you feel sad, you take a pill and you feel happy...

Better living through chemistry!

Re:Japan is insane.

[Baseclass]

Sound like somebody could use a little reNeducation.
Now just relax and let the hooks do their work

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

You should be pleased; just think how bitter you'll be when they force you to be happy!

Re:Japan is insane.

[winomonkey]

Having enjoyed the efficiency of their transit system on both local and cross-country travel while in Japan, I must say that it is a little amusing to have their methods criticized (or at least criticized without any supporting arguments). It is commonly accepted knowledge that smiling while talking on the phone is an effective way to improve how you are received while talking (Google it, or check out this short phone-etiquette article). Smiling also is seen as being, well ... friendly. Approachable. Nice, even. That is a huge thing when dealing with confused, angry, or impatient customers. While traveling around the Eastern seaboard on Amtrak, I had the train break down twice. On the first ride, the staff was frowning, short tempered, and not very gracious. I was a little less than thrilled, even though the delay was only 15 minutes. On the second ride I found the staff to generally be smiling and talkative, though unable to provide any more useful information than the first staff. An hour later and I was still stuck, but definitely happier with the service of the staff. While the tinfoil hat crowd can certainly point to issues that might arise if smiling is mandatory / frowning becomes punishable, this serves the very practical purpose of improving customer service by providing metrics and feedback to staff in a timely manner (preemptive seeming to be fairly timely to me).

Re:Japan is insane.

[Razalhague]

Yeah, and cannibalism is only crazy to you because you haven't lived their culture, history or know how cannibals have grown to think along the hundreds of years.

Sorry, but sometimes things seem crazy because they are.

Re:Japan is insane.

[fooslacker]

What the hell is wrong with the Japanese? What practical purpose does this serve?

"we've always been at war with Eastasia"

Obligatory 1984 hyperbole aside this is the corporate version of the thought police. That is be happy and show it if you want to work for us. How long before a chronically low smile rating becomes an excuse for termination, company provided pills, or psych leave?

Re:Japan is insane.

[ktappe]

Southwest people are trained to smile and be cheerful. American Air doesn't.

Southwest has less delays and is more profitable and the passagers are better behaved and quiet and cuterious of others.

Correlation is not causation. There are hundreds of other factors as to why SW might have fewer delays and be more profitable. For example, SW doesn't adhere to the archaic hub system but instead runs a point-to-point flight schedule. They also fly exactly one (1) model of aircraft (B737) so they only have to train mechanics on one model and keep only one model's parts in stock.

As for SW passengers, sure they're behaved. There have been several incidents of SW passengers being thrown off of planes due to their clothing choices ( http://www.gadling.com/2007/09/09/southwest-airlines-imposes-dress-code-on-passenger , http://money.cnn.com/2005/10/06/news/fortune500/southwest_shirt). Nothing like a little Draconian discipline to keep people in line.

Re:Japan is insane.

[RajivSLK]

where i work there is a 30 page book where half of each page is empty

Where I work there is no rule book.. wtf is wrong with you that makes you think that having *only* 15 pages of rules is a good thing?

Re:Japan is insane.

[pegr]

It is bad and/or weird. Japan, one of the most racist and nationalistic societies left on the planet (though not the only one left), practices many forms of conformity at the cost of the individual. Individuality is (sometimes literally) beaten out of the japanese since birth. There is no consideration of fairness, only service to the greater good, as defined by the politics of the day. I would be hard pressed to come up with a more accurate definition of institutional EVIL, quite frankly.

Yup, company-enforced smiling... Doesn't surprise me a bit. Most japanese will lie to you if they think that's what you want to hear. It's all about saving face, literally in this case. It's all a pack of lies to strengthen the greater good at the cost of the people. It's a broken model and should be treated with scorn and derision. It is bad and/or weird.

Gaijin-and-prefers-it-that-way

(Damn, now to post this comment, I have to hit "submit"!)

Re:Japan is insane.

[RabidMonkey]

Having worked in a very open company, which devolved into a restrictive one like you describe (books of rules) I can tell you exactly why they have books: because they need them.

There is always someone trying to game the system, someone looking for a loophole, an out, a way to abuse, steal, harass, annoy, slack, avoid and so on. So rules have to be made because one idiot decided to try and use $LOOPHOLE to get out of $WORK_BEING_PAID_FOR.

Add to that a union, and you've got a recipe for pages and pages of very specific rules.

For example, in that company, there was a rule: no tank tops. By common consensus, that meant no shirts without sleeves. But some would take that too far, and wear shirts that had very tiny sleeves, then claim, "its not a tank top". So they had to implement a rule that said "sleeves must be longer than 3" from the shoulder", but then someone argued about where the shoulder started, so they had to make an even MORE specific rule about the distance from the neck to the shoulder.

In short, there's one in every crowd. And that one ruins it for everyone else, in small, death-by-a-thousand-papercuts ways.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

please raise left lip 2mm

Re:Japan is insane.

[ShieldW0lf]

You are wrong. Japan is a society on its way to destruction because their population have intentionally sterilized themselves.

Some sources:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Demographics_of_Japan

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/7084749.stm

Welcome to your future. The western world is on the same trend, just a little behind the curve. I wonder why the rest of the world doesn't want to be like us?

Re:Japan is insane.

[Eric52902]

I'd rather he took the time to go through his pre-flight checklist!

Re:Japan is insane.

[Robotbeat]

...
Even then, I've never had a job that made me want to smile in the morning. Work is work, it's not to be freakin' enjoyed.

        I prefer that work ethic. I don't need shiny happy people asking how they can help me. I need someone to answer my question correctly in only as many works as required. ...

        I went in a store today to buy cigarettes. There's a really cute girl working the counter. Eye candy goes a long way. :) ... If I want a girl to flirt with me and blow smoke up my ass, I'd go see an escort. I'd say my wife, but any married man knows, once the ring goes on the finger, friendliness and complements are gone, unless she wants something. The friendlier she is, the more expensive the thing she wants.

Are you kidding me? An orgasm is the only thing that'll make you smile in the morning? I'm sorry to say, but you sound like a horrible person who mostly hates his life. I've had plenty of jobs which make me want to smile in the morning. No offense, but maybe if you didn't come off as a heartless bastard you'd get a job that you'd enjoy! Hell, even stacking boxes can be enjoyable if you have happy coworkers.

As far as your wife, well if you would give your wife something or do something special for her just randomly or even just compliment her (without her asking), then maybe you wouldn't have this contract-based relationship that's basically the same as being roommates with a prostitute. Women, even more than men, need to be loved without the love being directly and immediately attached to putting out. Having a jaded perspective on everything will lead to a miserable life and an early death. If you want to live a long life, well, you had better start loving life.

Re:Japan is insane.

[darkuncle]

Excuse me citizen - I believe you've missed your Interval; please report to the nearest Ministry office for assessment.

Re:Japan is insane.

[purplebear]

Well said. I was just thinking of how to respond. You said it better than I could have.

Re:Japan is insane.

[darkuncle]

*sigh* IMDB fail; try this Equilibrium instead.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Hurricane78]

It's the same fake attitude surface, that that group of pseudo-therapists recommends: To "just smile". As if it would be equal to inner happyness.

On the other hand, fake seems to be very popular in the US too. Boobies, buildings (wood and drywall, really?), monuments (Las Vegas), fights (Wrestling), politics (the Bush puppet + pretty much everything else), news (everyone, especially FOX) you name it. ^^

Re:Japan is insane.

[dyingtolive]

First one works for me too.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

There is no alternative I've found though. Thus the popularity of drinking, prozac/zoloft/happy pill of the moment, viagra ( since you don't really want to have sex with her but you think you should )...

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

Your attitude shows the typical american attitude -- if its not like us, its bad or weird.

Funny, that's a typical Japanese attitude too.

Re:Japan is insane.

[dontPanik]

Your username makes that post.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

same difference... they medicated back then as well

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

They obviously need to provide more Bouncy Bubbly Beverage and Cold Fun for desert after lunch.

I first read that as "Bouncy Bubbly Cleavage"...

Re:Japan is insane.

[Trepidity]

That's all, incidentally, the same reason unions exist in the first place: if you don't get the company's commitments down on paper, in a legal contract, negotiated and enforced by someone with the power to do something about breaches, the company will find as many loopholes as possible to cheat you.

(This applies to large companies' interactions with consumers too, which is why there are consumer-advocacy organizations and class-action lawsuits.)

Re:Japan is insane.

[shutdown -p now]

Your attitude shows the typical american attitude -- if its not like us, its bad or weird.

Er, no. I believe GP was following a different line of thought: if it's demeaning to one's humanity and dignity, then it is bad (no matter whether it is weird or not). Which is a very reasonable attitude to which I agree (even though I'm not an American).

Of course you can just say that there are other cultures in which human dignity is not valued as much as it is in Western culture, and that isn't in an of itself bad. But the same reasoning can be applied to thinks like cultural misogyny, and even torture executions, genital mutilation, and cannibalism. You have to draw a line somewhere - absolute cultural relativism is not viable.

Re:Japan is insane.

[VisceralLogic]

To provide an opposing viewpoint, when I go into RadioShack I usually know what I want, but not where exactly to find it... so I appreciate when they offer to help because then I tell them what I'm looking for, and they direct me to the proper location.

Re:Japan is insane.

[HTH NE1]

"Wait'll they get a load of me!" -- Jack Napier

Re:Japan is insane.

[Jaknet]

First one works for me too.

That's what I thought at first then I realised the first one is from 2004 about a man and a drinking binge. Whilst the second one is from 2002 about a Fascist future where all forms of feeling are illegal, and a man in charge of enforcing the law rises to overthrow the system and happens to be the correct film.

Re:Japan is insane.

[bickerdyke]

I'm actually quite happy that theres still diverse in cultures, specially because USA and Europe seems to be getting so much like the other one.

No wonder....

First Europe exported it's people and culture to America, and after WWII USA started to re-export their stuff.

Re:Japan is insane.

[bickerdyke]

This especially bugs me because I'm not a smilier and I like being bitter, damnit!

You should get a job over here in germany. You'd be perfect for german customer-service. Learn to utter something that might sound like german, and you're perfect employee for the national railway service.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

Mmm. And keeping a set of labels handy to define people is such a useful way to oganize your life.

Re:Japan is insane.

[interkin3tic]

What the hell is wrong with the Japanese?

Nothing, they're just slightly different from us. Employee loyalty is a bit higher over there, and the workers on the subways in particular seem to take very high pride in their jobs. The conductors (or whatever you call the guys who push "go" on the trains) always impressed me with their imaculate uniforms and white gloves. I mean, why do they even wear gloves? The only things they touch are the controls on the train, they're not taking tickets from the unwashed masses. A quick wipedown with some windex every day would probably accomplish the same level of cleanliness in the cockpit without all the laundry. Maybe I'm misreading it, I didn't grow up in that culture and haven't ever talked with a japanese subway worker, but it seems like they take a lot of pride in their jobs.

There's also an increased emphasis on politeness that we don't have over here, and less of an emphasis on individuality, the mindset over there seems to be slightly more "the nail that stands out gets hammered the hardest."

I'd imagine some company exec thought it up as a way to make sure everyone was as polite looking as they could be and as uniform as possible, and most of the employees don't mind or at least don't want to be the first one to call it ridiculous. Heck, it wouldn't suprise me if the workers themselves came up with it.

Re:Japan is insane.

[db10]

The fuel was sufficient, there just wasn't enough of it.

Re:Japan is insane.

[chogori]

People forget, too, that Japan has one of the highest suicide rates in the world.

Sure, forcing people to smile may not help very much, but could be effective as a part of a more comprehensive plan to help combat depression and anxeity in the workplace.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

If you knew anything about our culture, you would know that it's a work driven society unlike many other nations in the world, and as such it's a more 'stricter" attitude towards the work environment, why do you think chances are if you walk into one of our businesses you'll always see someone that's smiling or willing to be nice regardless of being foreign?

It's to promote good employee > customer relations.

Re:Japan is insane.

[jvkjvk]

Simple, if you smile and pretend to be happy, you actually become more happy.

Not so fast.

That may work in the short term but constantly smiling even when someone is yelling at you (like many customer service people are forced to endure) seems like it could lead to being miserable.

Smiling when you don't want to, being constantly forced to wear that mask would get me. Just the cognotive dissonance that builds up, day after day, not to mention the habituation of smiling like that, would seem to tend to wear down the real happiness you feel when you do "really" smile. I think that the 'fake' you would start to take over, and you would start to become unhappy, your happiness being ground away one fake smile at a time.

Cheers. :)

Re:Japan is insane.

[vainvanevein]

It is surprising how quickly acedia becomes wrath at the pride of those who don't think depression is a mental illness.

Re:Japan is insane.

[stephanruby]

Southwest people are trained to smile and be cheerful. American Air doesn't. Southwest has less delays and is more profitable and the passagers are better behaved and quiet and cuterious of others.

"Cuterious"? I've always wanted to ride in airplanes where the passengers were more cute, and more curious of others.

In any case, American Air has a centralized power structure, Southwest has less of one. In other words, if there is a problem, a lowly Southwest employee has far more leeway in making decisions than an American Airlines employee does. That in my opinion, is what gives Southwest the ability to have less delays and be more profitable than American Airlines (not the amount of superficial fake-sounding Dale Carnegie training they've had).

Re:Japan is insane.

[interkin3tic]

Funny, that's a typical Japanese attitude too.

From what I've seen, that's MORE japanese than american. Japan is pretty ethnocentric, they're a very homogenous island country. The corporate culture, from what I've heard, is also more "Conform or get put on the shit list," than over here. It's not as outright, but it's more widespread.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Rasperin]

I wish I had mod points, I don't care if you are AC this is most likely the actual reason. But people seem too short sighted and think it's a cultural thing.

Re:Japan is insane.

[sopssa]

Sure, forcing people to smile may not help very much, but could be effective as a part of a more comprehensive plan to help combat depression and anxeity in the workplace.

It's good in that way and also a general business principle. When I go to store and the cashier girl smiles at me, I feel happy. I feel better about the store I visited in, and I just generally feel a lot better aswell. Little things like that can actually make huge difference.

This same can be applied aswell when the employees make jokes. Today I went to store on last minute when it was closing. I asked the guard if it's ok to go in quickly, that I'll be fast. He said sure if quickly, and I took my beers and baquette quickly. When I was going out, the guard joked about that now I have good lunch and drinks for the night. That store is kinda cheap store in here (lidl), but it made my image of them a lot better.

Re:Japan is insane.

[bickerdyke]

You picked the one job that consists of at least pretending they have fun....

Re:Japan is insane.

[pezezin]

In my experience, anti-depressants make you feel nothing, neither positive nor negative emotions.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Aliotroph]

I found the same thing in tech support. It has side effects too. Occasionally these included women giving cell phone numbers and offering hugs. Often people were induced into wanting to tell stories. Those things, in turn, make the day suck much less. The guy on my team who never smiled on the phone had crappier days than me and didn't have a wallet full of unused cell numbers for strange women from Florida.

This doesn't mean you have to be a shining beacon of fake happiness at all times, since sometimes that does make people want to kill you. Empathy helps too.

Re:Japan is insane.

[skelterjohn]

[...] only service to the greater good, as defined by the politics of the day. I would be hard pressed to come up with a more accurate definition of institutional EVIL, quite frankly.

How about "only service to the greater EVIL"? That would be way more evil.

Re:Japan is insane.

[happyhamster]

Sure it's better if employees are smiling and are generally happy. Who's arguing? But it would be much better if they behaved that way because they are genuinely happy instead of the corporation forcing them to while underpaying them and treating them like crap behind the scenes.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Trian3]

This seems to be common on commuter railroads and subways. In New York City, the MTA has an entire "discipline department," whose job is the creation and enforcement of rules -- the rulebook is as thick as several of my engineering textbooks stacked on top of each other, and concerns everything from legitimate safety issues (employees cannot be intoxicated while on the job) to absurdities (procedures and times allotted for bathroom breaks, approved travel times when summoned for random drug tests, approved procedures for filing reports on infractions committed by other employees, etc.). It is also impossible for an employee to break any single rule, as one of the rules is "employees shall follow all the rules" and another is "employees shall be aware of all the rules." I am told that a typical disciplinary hearing involves 4-6 infractions, each of which is listed separately in the employee's work history if they are found to be in violation of the rules.

Yes, it's baffling as to why the suicide rate is so high. http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/asia/japan/5273786/Japanese-suicides-rise-as-world-recession-hits-countrys-businessmen.html

Re:Japan is insane.

[JWSmythe]

    I'm not a whore, I'm a slut, but lets keep my personal life out of this, ok?

Re:Japan is insane.

[wozzinator]

I almost wanted to post anonymously, but i see that parent agrees. What the f&@$ is wrong with the people who decided to make "smile scanning" a daily requirement.

Re:Japan is insane.

[4D6963]

I don't know, in general I think that on the other hand the "it's just fine because diversity is good" attitude is somehow a way to say "who cares what's in the interest of these people over there, all that matters is that they stay exotic (and thus satisfy my needs for exoticism and for a change of scene)".

All the Japanese aren't just fine with the way things are, mostly the newer generation, and that's arguably because things the Japanese have been doing for centuries aren't that great to them. But by all means don't let that get in the way of your appreciation for things that you don't have to go through but that others have to put up with.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Nursie]

I'm not qualified to talk about the wife thing, but about work and mornings -

SOME OF US ARE NOT MORNING PEOPLE.

Short of giving me a good snort of cocaine in the AM, all I want is to be left alone with a coffee. I might cheer up in the afternoon. By evening I feel good. By 10pm I could take on the world.

I enjoy work sometimes, I like my coworkers, several of whom also are not morning people. I think if anyone tried this smile measurement treatment on me I'd either quit or go insane. Being made to smile for a job I didn't enjoy would destroy me.

Re:Japan is insane.

[scottv67]

> In my experience, anti-depressants make you feel nothing, neither positive nor negative emotions.

It could be that you did not try the right ones. There are certain anti-depressants that have a profound positive effect on my mood. The people that I work with can tell I am much happier and more easy to get along with when I am "on the meds". I agree with what you said regarding "feeling nothing." Anti-depressants seem to give me "thicker skin" and make it less likely for me to be affected by the crazy stuff that goes on at work. Sometimes, a little "patience in a pill" is not a bad thing.

Re:Japan is insane.

[mqduck]

All hail The Computer? Wow, maybe Paranoia was about Japan all along...

Re:Japan is insane.

[mqduck]

There is no consideration of fairness, only service to the greater good, as defined by the politics of the day. I would be hard pressed to come up with a more accurate definition of institutional EVIL, quite frankly.

There are far worse things to make the population work for than "the greater good".

Re:Japan is insane.

[mqduck]

Most japanese will lie to you if they think that's what you want to hear.

Japan, one of the most racist... societies

And, apparently, wherever pegr is from.

Re:Japan is insane.

[mqduck]

Southwest [Airlines] people are trained to smile and be cheerful.

Exactly. This isn't about Japanese work culture being (more) fucked up, it's just another example of Japanese culture being (more) obsessed with technology.

Re:Japan is insane.

[bishiraver]

There's evidence that cannibalism only begins occuring once a culture is stressed beyond the norm. An example being archeological evidence showing that the Druids, while not typically cannibalistic, performed ritual cannibalism when they were being wiped out by the romans. Speculation has it they they used it as a last resort - one last thing that might make the gods smile upon them and let them drive out the invading roman forces.

There's also evidence that tribal cannibalism elsewhere has only become a recent development, starting with british colonialism.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

It allows you to be contagiously happy and make money

Phase 1: whippits

Phase 2: anything?

Phase 3: coin

Re:Japan is insane.

[NerveGas]

Traditional Japanese culture has been to not externally show ANY emotion. A very large portion of the population grew up without EVER learning to smile, and it is foreign to them.

Now that it is catching up, many of them actually need to learn HOW to smile. It seems insane to us, but it's how things are.

Re:Japan is insane.

[icebrain]

How the hell does this get "informative"?

Precautionary fuel stops are signs of a safe pilot.

When you start getting into the realm of commercial airliners, every extra pound carried on the aircraft equates to additional fuel burned--and therefore extra cost. The aircraft aren't usually filled up before every flight*--they typically only carry enough to get to the destination, plus reserves (30-45min or more, depending on weather and stuff) and maybe some to get to a preselected alternate airport, if required. But sometimes, even that isn't enough. Unexpectedly strong headwinds, delays on the ground or while airborne, mechanical issues**, etc. can all result in not having enough fuel to make it to the destination with the desired margin of safety. In that case, they will stop to refuel.

* One exception is called "tankering". Sometimes, the fuel at the destination is so expensive that it's cheaper to carry extra fuel for later and just eat the extra fuel burn.

** Certain mechanical issues (broken APU, one inoperative pressurization pack, etc.) are specifically allowed, within limits. And before you get your thongs in a wad, they don't affect safety of flight. Sometimes, though, those come with altitude, routing, or speed restrictions, which can increase fuel burn.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Tanktalus]

[...] there is a 30 page book where half of each page is empty

Is that so that your infraction can be written in after they want to fire you?</tinfoil-hat>

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

It was 6 years ago, in my last year of high school. The pills were prescribed by a quite good psychiatrist. When I were taking them, they had mostly positive effects on me; the lack of emotions came severeal months after I had stopped taking them. Fortunately the effects disappeared a long time ago.

After that, I got a new appreciation of characters like Spock and Data.

Re:Japan is insane.

[$pace6host]

Absolutely. I just finished reading Blink, and although it is not the central idea in the book, Gladwell does touch on, and reference some studies that examine a connection between expressions made consciously on the face, and their influences on mood. If you're interested in more information, look for some of the work by Tomkins, Ekman, Friesan, and Levenson. Also, Gladwell has a website where he has some of the material from his New Yorker column that he put in Blink. In one quote about their experience when teaching themselves to make the micro-expressions they were trying to study, Ekman says "What we discovered is that that expression alone is sufficient to create marked changes in the autonomic nervous system. When this first occurred, we were stunned." Now, I'm not convinced that a smile alone is enough to cure depression, but I think it's interesting research, and I wouldn't be surprised if one's expression could help contribute to a positive mood.

Re:Japan is insane.

[taucross]

Those 'happiness studies' that say a person gets happier by smiling fail to account for those that truly enjoy being miserable.

Re:Japan is insane.

[bogjobber]

I am glad for the work done by unions in the past (and to a smaller extent the present) but holy crap. I am so glad I live in a right to work state and work for an employer that treats their employees correctly. I have a pretty crappy job, but I'm still given leeway to make my own decisions about how to actually do my job. I can't imagine how I would feel if I had to work at a place with a rulebook other than "be professional and do you job." Bathroom time written in the contract? Give me a break.

If my manager thought what someone was wearing was improper, they would tell them to stop. If they didn't, they would be fired. As simple as that. It's a shame that organizations have to grow beyond the level that trusting basic human decency and personal relationships stops working.

Re:Japan is insane.

[taucross]

In regards to emotions and the more intangible aspects of a human being, the only replicable way of controlling them is through mimicry. It certainly is not inner happiness. However, by immersing ourselves in a certain environment we invariably attain homeostasis with it.

Like a young child playing with a plastic hammer to imitate his dad, he doesn't really know what he is doing, or the meaning of it. But in time he will grow to ably tackle the task on his own. The quality of happiness, or sadness, or whatever, works in the same way - it may start off a misguided, fake, and poor attempt, but will eventually grow to walk on its own feet.

Re:Japan is insane.

[thesandtiger]

It must absolutely suck to be you, to work with you, or to have you as a customer. Maybe you should look into a different line of work.

I love my job and I have a great time doing it. I work with people I genuinely like. When I go home at the end of the day I feel like I accomplished something meaningful with the 1/3rd (or more) of my day I spent earning a living. Why wouldn't I want a huge fraction of my life to be as enjoyable as possible? What benefit is there in making it some kind of soulless, cold experience?

Re:Japan is insane.

[axlash]

First, there's a difference between voluntarily deciding not to have children (where you are free to change your mind) and sterilization (where it's much more difficult). Secondly, don't assume that Japan *will* continue along this path. When the factors driving Japanese couples to have fewer children disappear, then the fertility rate will go up.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Atario]

Report for re-Ned-ucation, citizen, on the doubly-ubbly!

Re:Japan is insane.

[PaganRitual]

What if they start demanding you report to the attitude modification center for your antidepressants because you're not smiling all day long? This especially bugs me because I'm not a smilier and I like being bitter, damnit!

On the flip side of that, I do like free antidepressants.

Re:Japan is insane.

[cyberzephyr]

As long as your'e not funky!

I used to work in Munich at an old SS Barracks that we had to have folks re-model for us and one guy smelled sooo bad that i had to leave while he replaced a thermite canister for me.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Petrushka]

It was originally called Acedia. ... This was subdivided into Despair (Latin, Tristitia) and Sloth (Latin, Socordia)

I found this bizarre, since the word literally means "without kedos", i.e. "carefree" both in the sense of "without heed", "indifferent" and also in the sense of "without sorrow", "happy". In Greek the adjectival form akedes regularly has both meanings (the noun is rarer).

So I went and read the WP article on Akedeia, which asserts that the term is used to refer to "depression" solely in a spiritual sense.

That's quite a difference in usage. It strikes me as a nice illustration of the relationship between spirituality and everyday reality.

Re:Japan is insane.

[PachmanP]

Learn to utter something that might sound like german, and you're perfect employee for the national railway service.

Do you think the ability to curse fluently in several Klingon dialects is close enough? If so I might finally be able to get a job!!!!

Re:Japan is insane.

[PachmanP]

Yeah, and cannibalism is only crazy to you because you haven't lived their culture, history or know how cannibals have grown to think along the hundreds of years.

Sorry, but sometimes things seem crazy because they are.

Nah cannibalism makes sense in the cultural context. It usually develops in places where there are severe problems with getting enough protein. Eventually, people stop wasting perfectly good meat. That and pork is a big delicacy in Polynesia.

I'm not a cannibal but I did stay in a holiday inn last night.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Razalhague]

OK, maybe I should've been clearer, but I meant the "predatory" kind of cannibalism, not the "carrion eating" kind.

Re:Japan is insane.

[GoodNicksAreTaken]

I'm unionized (Communication Workers of America) and my employer doesn't have a manual other than a really horribly written harassment policy and a cell phone policy. It would be great to have a manual so workers weren't being harassed for rules that are essentially made up on the fly. At my previous employer where we were not union there was a huge thick manual and rules on exactly how much time you could spend in the bathroom and a pregnant woman fired for spending too much time. Union or not union, manual or no manual, employers will be bastards to employees if that is the type of employer they are. Japan just makes it an acceptable part of their culture.

Re:Japan is insane.

[zorro-z]

I have to agree. I have several users who call, frequently, w/mind-blowingly stupid problems. On occasion, I've had to show one of them where the power button was on a computer. But, when I see one of them calling- I *love* Caller ID- I make sure to take a deep breath, smile, and only *then* answer the phone. It works- the user gets a cheerful tech, + I don't get miserable about yet another PEBKAC.

It's a matter of extent. Encouraging your employees to keep a cheerful attitude w/customers helps the customers + probably the employees as well. Making employees check in w/a smile meter is both demeaning + vaguely unsettling, and could well have the opposite of the intended affect.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

How about trying to turn your population into mindless drones?

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

Are you of Japanese ethnicity and currently living in Japan ? No ? Then SHUT THE FUCK UP!

This is simple brainwashing, seems to be a common dish around here. Maybe then it's not such a big surprise that we're in the top 10 countries for highest suicide rate. Too much BS!

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

There you go again with that extremely broad brush. This is not Japan, it is a company. As for the practical purpose, it's related to cultural cues which you would obviously not even begin to understand.

Re:Japan is insane.

[mqduck]

No doubt very "evil", yes. But what irritates me is this idea that working for the "greater good" = bad, whereas working for yourself = good.

Re:Japan is insane.

[billcopc]

Without these asinine rules and the unions that forced them to be written, bosses would be forced to make real judgment calls about whether an employee is decent and honest. Of course, employees would also be expected to behave in a decent and honest manner. Integrity is dead, plain and simple. We have Gen X and Y to thank for that.

If we fired all the lazy abusive assholes and kicked them back to the shit jobs they deserve, maybe the world would be a better place. I certainly enjoy working in a small company where everything is casual and problems are addressed with face-time and sincere two-way communication. If the boss proposes something ridiculous, I tell him exactly what I think, and he takes my opinion into consideration. That easygoing attitude works both ways: if I need something special (like time off or budget for gear), I ask for it and usually get it. If the company needs something extra from me (late/early service call, weekend emergency), they ask for it and usually get it. It's simple, it works, and I don't need to give 5% of my paycheque to a mob^H^H^Hunion.

Re:Japan is insane.

[arashi sohaku]

That's called PhonePro training, and everyone in the support call center I worked at for Sharp was required to take it. They believed that a smile on your face could be "heard" on the other end, and made the customer more likely to be friendly, even if they started off angry.

Re:Japan is insane.

[gstoddart]

Over here if you smile all day at work they test you for pot.

Or, you're Smilin' Bob -- though, not smiling quite so much these days. :-P

Cheers

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

ShieldW0lf still won't support his claims, and the only possible reason why is because he knows he can't.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

I have a label for people like you. It's "MORON".

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

It enables the ruling class to totally enslave the working class, even the way they smile, so that when they send them to war they are trained to listen to orders and execute them with no second thoughts. That's capitalism.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

And what make you think that individuality is so important that you seem intolerant of non-individualistic societies?
For someone ranting about racism, you seem pretty racist yourself, but that's to be expected of people who think they know better.

Re:Japan is insane.

[dynamo52]

I did you one better; I laughed out loud.

Re:Japan is insane.

[bickerdyke]

No. That's the OTHER kind of 'freak'. But that klingon attitude is just perfect.....

Re:Japan is insane.

[dynamo52]

This especially bugs me because I'm not a smilier and I like being bitter, damnit!

You should be pleased; just think how bitter you'll be when they force you to be happy!

If he's pleased than maybe he is not so bitter and that could be what's bugging him.

Re:Japan is insane.

[shiftless]

How is pegr's comment racist in any way?
Mod parent down.

Re:Japan is insane.

[shiftless]

I can tell you exactly why they have books: because they need them.

There is always someone trying to game the system, someone looking for a loophole, an out, a way to abuse, steal, harass, annoy, slack, avoid and so on.

Whatever happened to managers simply handling each situation in an appropriate manner, and firing those who continually cause problems?

Oh wait, that would require managers to actually think and be a leader. Instead we get managers who use the rule book as a crutch to compensate for their complete lack of leadership qualities.

Re:Japan is insane.

[TheLink]

Well I hope my cells keep working for the "greater good", don't start believing the "working for yourself=good" stuff.

And also kill all the cells that decide to strike it out on their own.

Yeah I'm evil like that.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Hognoxious]

Instead we get managers who use the rule book as a crutch to compensate for their complete lack of leadership qualities.

It's not just that. If you fire someone for doing something and you don't fire someone else for something similar, you're open to a discrimination lawsuit.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

Yeah, but at least on American they know how to spell, and the difference between "less" and "fewer".

Re:Japan is insane.

[sonicmerlin]

I agree, and I'm actually astonished to find someone voice this opinion on Slashdot. Very few people in the West decry the internationalization (really Westernization) of cultures in the East and Middle East. Whether it's "women's rights" or "Hollywood", every thing they follow they believe to be the absolute truth and must be shoved down the throats of other nations' cultures through social programs and foreign businesses.

Re:Japan is insane.

[sonicmerlin]

It's very difficult to understand why the birth rate is so low though. In my opinion once the population drops to critically low levels the government will go all militant style and trash all the post-WWII changes that have contributed to the declining birth rate. We're talking banning women from work and requiring families have at least 3 children. Considering the nature of this article, it's not hard to see the government going that far.

Re:Japan is insane.

[sonicmerlin]

"Catching up"? With you and your culture? Maybe yours is the one behind and the Japanese are ahead?

Re:Japan is insane.

[marqs]

I actually think that the Swedish railway service already bought the beta of this system. since it is in beta there are some minor bugs; most notably it tells the railway workers to frown and shout a lot. Guess we have to wait for the stable release...

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

Heh. You think the Deutsche Bahn is bad? Try flying with SAS/Scandinavian Airlines System some time.

DB employees often still have that lovely Beamtenmentalität that says "I only care about rules, not people (especially not customers)". SAS employees, on the other hand, actively seem to HATE you.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Nephrite]

SMAIRU! SMAIRU!

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

I spent a year working technical support and I applied the "smile" when you talk rule. It made me happy to tell customers no, happy to give them the run around and happy to make them angry. 6 months later I was a supervisor happy to tell customers the final "no we don't support that," and happy to fire people and happy to be an ass hole.

Yeah, I realized that that fake smile became a real smile and I became happy to strictly obey the rules to the letter and make people miserable.

Its brain washing though and through.

I'm glad I realized what I had become and changed it to being happy to help and happy to work with the customers and employees. 2 months later I did not have a job.

Re:Japan is insane.

[walshy007]

Integrity is dead, plain and simple. We have Gen X and Y to thank for that.

Integrity is not dead, but it is rare, and always has been, Gen X and Y have done nothing to change this

Re:Japan is insane.

[Hurricane78]

I think you misunderstood me.

I meant the following very simple* thing:

- Imagine your most loved person dies.
- You start to feel sadness because of it. Which is the new formed neural connection directing many impulses to your center for sadness hormone release.
- Now if you put on a happy face, this process will not change one bit. You can say you are happy, dance and sing. But that hormone still floods your body. You can even see it in the missing energy of your posture and movements, and the fakeness of the smile (when mouth grins, but the eyes do not).
- Only when you process that bad feeling, re-routing your neural connections in the process, will you get rid of that feeling again.

This has nothing to do with imitation or poor attempts.
___
* I do never use hidden meanings, because I find them primitive and a form of lying.

Re:Japan is insane.

[furby076]

And it's only crazy to you because you haven't lived their culture, history or know how japanese people have grown to think along the hundreds of years

No - it's crazy because until they show a reason why this may work I will take my communications training (human communication) and realize that forcing people to smile doesn't make them happier...it makes them annoyed.

Your attitude shows the typical american attitude -- if its not like us, its bad or weird.

I also think cutting someone's hands off because they stole an apple is insane. I think stoning a woman for not wearing a full head to toe (including face) covering is insane..guess that's a typical american attitude.....

Oh and BTW - I did study Japanese culture (spent two semesters, with two classes dedicated to it) for my commications major.

Re:Japan is insane.

[furby076]

There are far worse things to make the population work for than "the greater good".

Whose greater good are we talking about? Christians? Muslims? Jews? US? Russia? China? Bush? Obama? The Supreme Ruler? See the problem. When you force people to serve "the greater good" you have to define what that is. Certain things are basic - you can't go around killing people randomly - but other things aren't so basic - force people to smile because it WILL make them happy.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Elbowgeek]

But their porn is pretty good...

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

Could just be me, but in that situation all the crazy specific rules could've been avoided if the uptight stupid rule was never introduced in the first place?

What good reason do they have for banning sleeve-less tops? I can see H&S rules against sleeves - getting caught in machinery etc. - but none that are against tank tops?

Its common to blame the unions for this kinda stuff - but if the workplace hadn't been so determined to retain control over every aspect they can, maybe we wouldn't need the rulebooks at all, let alone a union to make sure they don't get too controlling.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

On our way to destruction is bit over-dramatic. Our population growth has dipped into the negative, but that's not a bad thing. In fact its required as the worlds population was/is still nearing unmanageable numbers.

Might have some interesting effects on individual countries as we get many more retirees and people dying than we do coming into working age... but maybe then we won't be so closed minded about immigration and start to embrace the flood of qualified people, skills and cutlure coming from other parts of the world.... though probably not :(

Re:Japan is insane.

[ShieldW0lf]

On our way to destruction is bit over-dramatic. Our population growth has dipped into the negative, but that's not a bad thing. In fact its required as the worlds population was/is still nearing unmanageable numbers.

China and India hold 2/3 of the worlds population. They both export food. Sorry, but all you are doing is perpetuating a myth that was never real, but rather was created by those whose ideological goals are furthered by that assumption.

Re:Japan is insane.

[ShieldW0lf]

Don't you hate it when parasitic, lying, adulterous whores follow you around? Yeah, me too...

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

This seems to be quite a common problem with systems of law in general. But given its absurdity and general tastelessness, can we come up with a better way to deal with it? Such as:

- more general rules or principles
- greater judicial discretion (it is often considered a bad thing for judges to follow discretion rather than 'the evidence')

If the judiciary -is- fair, wise and just then their decisions will be regarded with respect. I suppose if the judiciary is not respected then they must be not fair or not wise or not just, so there's a useful barometer with which to assess them. Do we really need mountains of case law to be picked over at great cost by lawyers? Why do we have an obsession with trying to ensure the law is not applied arbitrarily, the net effect of which is to ensure that it is arbitrary because cases are often won by the best lawyers rather than ... oh we were talking about a smilometer.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

Very informative.

I now get the feeling that I'm screwed.

Listless is a good descriptor for me as I don't get much done with vigor. (I do get stuff done, however.)

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

When you are happy annoying people...

You should consider management.

Re:Japan is insane.

[JWSmythe]

    I was considering becoming a hit man. The person buying the contract wouldn't want to be seen face-to-face, and the recipient of the "gift" would shut up when I was done.

    Do you have any other suggestions for other lines of work?

Re:Japan is insane.

[Jesus_666]

You're confusing "bitter" and "hostile".

By the way, you don't need to constantly frown to be hired by the Bahn. If you're a cheerful kind of asshole you can drive around the concessions cart and shout "REFRESHMENTS, SANDWICHES" into the ears of people who try to work.

Re:Japan is insane.

[StellarFury]

That might be true for me too, if the local RadioShack in my town didn't have a grand total of 400 sq. ft. of shop area. There's two shelves, and stuff on the walls. You can canvass the whole place in roughly 3 minutes.

So yeah, if I'm looking in a big store, and am legitimately lost, I _might_ appreciate the help. On the other hand, though, if I need help, I'll ask for it - I don't need to be asked.

Re:Japan is insane.

[bandmassa]

Somebody's not smiling, are they? ;-)

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

What about my pointing out your constant refusal to support your ludicrous claims are you trying to pass off as "parasitic", "lying", "adulterous", or "whorish"?

Re:Japan is insane.

[mqduck]

How is pegr's comment racist in any way?

I assume that's sarcasm.

Re:Japan is insane.

[mqduck]

I don't disagree, but I was responding to the comment that you'd be "hard pressed to come up with a more accurate definition of institutional EVIL", which is just nonsense.

Re:Japan is insane.

[hab136]

Work is work, it's not to be freakin' enjoyed.

I have a label for people who have that attitude about life. It's "WHORE".

For years whenever someone asked what my job was, I said "corporate whore". Which is not far from the truth, since I passed up a low-paying but exciting job for making the big bucks at a corporate behemoth.

Ten years later I've reversed it, and now make nothing at a fun job, but I don't regret the decision.

What screws people up is that they don't want to admit, even to themselves, that they work at the job for the money. Either try to do something fun/good with your work and ignore the money, or realize that you're just there for the money and don't attach your self-worth to what you do.

Re:Japan is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

China and India hold 2/3 of the worlds population. They both export food.

Right, because exporting food proves that you couldn't possibly have hunger problems domestically - just ask the millions who starved during the Great Leap Forward. And it's not like India has a serious hunger problem, either. Also, food is the only resource for which humans compete; no other problems can ever arise from or be exacerbated by overpopulation.

Re:Japan is insane.

[theanorak]

I don't really get this.

Take the example of acceptable clothing. How about you say, "we recommend something along the lines of x, y, z. O, P and Q are definitely forbidden. Basically, we're looking for [formal/biz casual/this dorky uniform/whatever]. If you wear something we don't like, we'll [tell you not to wear it again/send you home to change and dock your pay the missing time]. If you have to be cautioned about your clothes more than 5 times, we'll terminate your contract".

Doesn't that cover all the bases? And in any case, for pretty much all employees worth having, wouldn't "hey Dave, the combat pants don't really cut it..." be sufficient?

Re:Japan is insane.

[Geminii]

the big "ra ra ra" thing

"Ra ra ra! I hate you all! Ra ra ra! Go die in a fire! Ra ra ra! You piss me off! Ra ra ra! Getttttttt stuffed!" You're right, I do feel better!

Re:Japan is insane.

[NerveGas]

There's an old saying... "When it's you against the world, bet on the world." Outside of Japan, few cultures - if any - don't smile.

Re:Japan is insane.

[sonicmerlin]

So...the entire Orient is a 'few cultures'? Also India, Pakistan, most Middle Eastern cultures.

Re:Japan is insane.

[NerveGas]

All of the Pakistanis, Palestinians, Iraqis, Chinese, Indians, and Jordanians I've ever met have smiled.

Re:Japan is insane.

[sonicmerlin]

You're not particularly aware of cultures outside the West are you? I'm not trying to insult you. It's just surprising to me. People in Japan do smile, something you'd become aware of if you ever visited Japan or met some traveling abroad. But the most common theme among Eastern cultures is introversion and stability, manifested by a general lack of excessive grinning and laughing. It's not that they don't laugh or smile. They just don't do it nearly as often as in the West. I'm Asian myself. I've been in Japan, India, Korea, etc. I do recognize these patterns, which you can also read about in any behavioral journal worth their 2 cents.

Re:Japan is insane.

[pegr]

There are far worse things to make the population work for than "the greater good".
"...as defined by the politics of the day."

There is nothing worse, oh Selective Quote Person! Bet you're a politician. No values, no truth, just BS your way into success at the cost of the people. Can't say that is an admirable position, but you'll fool some of the people some of the time.

Re:Japan is insane.

[pegr]

No doubt very "evil", yes. But what irritates me is this idea that working for the "greater good" = bad, whereas working for yourself = good.

Working for the Greater Good as defined by someone else (politics of the day, perhaps?) = Bad.
Working for the Greater Good as defined by you = moral/ethical/enlightened existence.

Individuality is not evil. Blindly following the politically popular position is evil. See? Not really nonsense at all, now is it?

Bad news...

[tnk1]

Those employees about to be terminated receive the following critique:

"WHY SO SERIOUS?"

Re:Bad news...

[JWSmythe]

    I guess it would matter what your definition of "terminated" is.

Re:Bad news...

[wbren]

In that case, they're just lucky to be railroad workers instead of pencil factory workers. Actually, I'm not sure which is worse...

Re:Bad news...

[MonsterTrimble]

You sir, just obsoleted my 'disappearing pencil trick' comment. I salute you.

Actually, dealing with this stuff would make me want to do the pencil trick to myself...

Flair!

[Anonymous Coward]

And be sure to wear some flair. That would be great.

Re:Flair!

[palegray.net]

See James over there? He's got a fantastic smile! Customers really like him... you could just do the minimum smile, but you don't want to be a minimum kind of employee, now do you?

Re:Flair!

[Talderas]

You know, the Nazis had pieces of flair that they made the Jews wear.

Is James a Jew?

Re:Flair!

[palegray.net]

I wasn't aware he had any religious affiliation.

Re:Flair!

[Anonymous Coward]

And be sure to wear some flair. That would be great.

Ya know, the Nazi's had flair...

Smile here

[Anonymous Coward]

^_____________________________________^

  Filter error: Your comment looks too much like ascii art.

All I can Say Is...

[Anonymous Coward]

:) :) :)

Because large smiles are so comforting...

[Red4man]

I mean, who wouldn't trust this smiling guy to get the train to the station on time?

Re:Because large smiles are so comforting...

[hairpinred]

For that matter, There's Smiling Bob, too.

Re:Because large smiles are so comforting...

[Stormwatch]

Don't forget the Grinman.

Hack it to print this

[iamhigh]

CHEEZ!!!

I can say only one thing

[Ronald Dumsfeld]

Fuck. Right. Off.

I can be polite and professional without smiling.

Re:I can say only one thing

[iron-kurton]

Looks like someone has a case of the Mondays

Re:I can say only one thing

[tnk1]

Fuck. Right. Off.

I can be polite and professional without smiling.

There's something contradictory about these statements... but I can't quite put my finger on it.

Re:I can say only one thing

[Hognoxious]

Nothing contradictory at all. He isn't being polite and professional to you.

And seeng what a pillock you are, I don't blame him.

Re:I can say only one thing

[JWSmythe]

    You know, every time I hear that directed towards me, it sends me into a little rage inside.

    Today is special though. It's bring your gun to work Monday. I have something a little more special for you today. I'd to introduce you to my friend, Mr. Glock. It's not a matter of workplace violence. It's a matter of attitude control.

Re:I can say only one thing

[Anonymous Coward]

Fuck. Right. Off.

I can be polite and professional without smiling.

case and point!

Re:I can say only one thing

[Anonymous Coward]

No, no there isn't. He said that he can be polite and professional. He did not say that he was trying to be polite and professional at the moment.
See what a little thinking can do?

Re:I can say only one thing

[Dr. LeRoy]

Looks like someone has a case of the Mondays

Can't you tell he was smiling when he said that?

Re:I can say only one thing

[Tolkien]

Hmm. You weren't modded Funny, so groupthink must be to back away slowly. *smiles and excuses himself politely*

Re:I can say only one thing

[Anonymous Coward]

You sound awfully angry.
Cheer up, mate. Maybe try smiling.

Re:I can say only one thing

[tnk1]

I sincerely hope he wasn't being polite or professional to me, because as far as I know, he wasn't even talking to me.

In any event, I consider the effort that you have put into your post well-spent, even if my slightly obscure sense of humor has missed its mark with you.

You see, I've never been called a pillock before, and I must say, it sort of tickles.

Thank you for making me smile.

Re:I can say only one thing

[shutdown -p now]

There's something contradictory about these statements... but I can't quite put my finger on it.

Duh... professionals don't put a period after every word in a sentence - it's not proper grammar! ~

Re:I can say only one thing

[Anonymous Coward]

You want to head to chachkis?

Re:I can say only one thing

[iron-kurton]

I prefer Flingers. They don't make you wear pieces of flair.

Re:I can say only one thing

[JWSmythe]

    And so begins the intended attitude adjustments. :)

Re:I can say only one thing

[Anonymous Coward]

He was probably smiling while he typed that.

Articre text

[Anonymous Coward]

More than 500 staff at Keihin Erectric Express Rairway are expected to be subjected to dairy face scans by "smire porice" bosses.

The "smire scan" software, deveroped by the Japanese company Omron, produces a sweeping anarysis of a smire based on faciar characteristics, from rip curves and eye movements to wrinkres.

After scanning a face, the device produces a rating between zero to 100 depending on the estimated varue of the furfirred potentiar of a person's biggest smire.

For those with a berow-par grin, one of an array of smire-boosting messages wirr op up on the computer screen ranging from "you stirr rook too serious" to "rift up your mouth corners", according to the Mainichi Dairy News.

A growing number of service industries are reportedry using the new Omron Smire Scan system for "smire training" among its staff.

Workers at Keihin Erectric Express Rairway wirr receive a print out of their dairy smire which they wirr be expected to keep with then throughout the day to inspire them to smire at arr times, the report added.

Re:Articre text

[Anonymous Coward]

I'm so ronery...

fake vs genuine

[prakslash]

This may seem bizzare but scientists have long made a distinctinction betwen "fake smiles" and "genuine smiles".
See this and this.

For people who have to deal with members of the public on a daily basis, being able to produce a smile that seems genuine may make a difference in how their customers perceive their service.

Re:fake vs genuine

[Anonymous Coward]

Crap. I got ALL of them wrong :( -Kaushik

Re:fake vs genuine

[Anonymous Coward]

Yes, that's the most important part of honesty: being able to fake it.

Re:fake vs genuine

[Arslan ibn Da'ud]

For people who have to deal with members of the public on a daily basis, being able to produce a smile that seems genuine may make a difference in how their customers perceive their service.

I can't tell a fake smile from a real one, but I sure can spot the oxymoron in that sentence. So the goal is to present a fake smile that others think is genuine?

Re:fake vs genuine

[Aladrin]

And it really does matter. I can tell when someone's smile isn't real, and I get creeped out by it. They may be smiling as required, but I'm under no illusion that they will be really nice... Like, not spitting in my drink. Fake smiles are a sign that someone is looking to mess you over. For an employee, that's usually because the company is messing them over to start with.

Re:fake vs genuine

[spire3661]

Yes, its called acting and is a professional skill. Almost any 5-star/executive/platinum level service personnel are, on some basic level, actors. They can create an experience with their mood, demeanor and charisma. Ever have a 'charming' hostess? Do you think that her being 'charming' is not a skill or talent?

Re:fake vs genuine

[Anonymous Coward]

Yes, it is often profitable to successfully convince others that something that is fake in genuine.

By the way, check out these great Bolex watches, only $50!

captcha: proverbs

Re:fake vs genuine

[morgan_greywolf]

Sure you can. Go check this self-test out. There are three smiles, one is fake, one is real, and one is a smile of contempt. Probably very few people with average or even mediocre social kills would get that wrong. I think we're wired to see the difference, even though we can't seem to define exactly what makes a smile "genuine."

Re:fake vs genuine

[Maximum Prophet]

The most important things in life are honesty and sincerity. Once you can fake those, you've got it made.

Re:fake vs genuine

[Anonymous Coward]

I can tell when someone's smile isn't real

Wow - how do you do that? Is it some sort of psychic ability? Are you going to use your power for good or for evil? What's your superhero/villain name gonna be?

Judging from this, I'd say villain.

Re:fake vs genuine

[19thNervousBreakdown]

If you can't, there's something wrong with you.

Re:fake vs genuine

[AgentSmith]

Don't know anyone will see this.

This is the secret to the first test.
It's not the smile. It's the whole face.

1)A true smile engages more muscles. It makes the face and especially the eyes look "bright".

2)A fake smile doesn't use as much. Those faces actually look like a predator about ready to eat you.

3)Contempt is a little more difficult. You almost could hear the "Hrmph" coming from the person.

Relax...

[Anonymous Coward]

...and let the hooks do their work.

China is not oppressive - japan is

[furby076]

Really...at least in China they don't give a crap if you are sad. You can frown all you want. In Japan - smile or the "smile police" will get you. WTF is wrong with you? How will this do anything other then make people more annoyed. Instead of spending this time/resources on crap how about you spend this time/resources on 1) giving your employees a free lunch, 2) giving them a raise (way to make me smile), or giving them extra time off since you obviously have so much money to spend on stupid smiley police.

Re:China is not oppressive - japan is

[PainKilleR-CE]

They already probably get paid more than whatever their equivalent would be in the US or China, and get more time off. You can't give them a raise every day to keep them smiling, and this probably works.

Not that I support this in any way, it's just a much more logical way of solving the problem than most, when you really think about it.

Re:China is not oppressive - japan is

[Rakshasa Taisab]

In other places the ones in power oppress you, while in Japan you oppress yourself.

Smile Scans Are Magnitudes Better Than

[Anonymous Coward]

total body scans at U.S.A. Gulag airports.

Yours In Socialism,
Kilgore Trout

Office space...

[RyanFenton]

Here's the Obligitory link to the Office Space 'Chochkies' scene

Except this time, folks DO need the job, and their co-workers are contorting their own faces in ways that may show up in archeological remains. Remember folks - competition doesn't always result in absolutely productive pressures, just selective ones.

Ryan Fenton

Another Great Leap Forward?

[filesiteguy]

I read this and can't help but think of Mao's slogan, "Smile, you're happy!" I know this is a private company - or at least a single government entity - but still it smacks of Orwellianism.

Maybe it is actually doubleplusgood but I just don't get it.

Re:Another Great Leap Forward?

[PainKilleR-CE]

Here in Virginia, you're not supposed to smile in your DMV pictures any more because it supposedly messes up facial recognition software used by the state. Guess I have 4 years to find somewhere that doesn't do this before they start tracking my face all over town.

Re:Another Great Leap Forward?

[Anonymous Coward]

The easy way to break this is simply to smile all the time EXCEPT when you are getting your facial recognition picture taken.

Re:Another Great Leap Forward?

[Jah-Wren Ryel]

Here in Virginia, you're not supposed to smile in your DMV pictures any more because it supposedly messes up facial recognition software used by the state.

That requirement is becoming more and more common around the country. I'm planning on going the other way - making a really pissed-off scowling face and stuffing a bunch of cotton balls or something like that into the space around my gums in order to distort my facial appearance too.

Re:Another Great Leap Forward?

[tnok85]

Well, that kind of makes it easy to never get your face recognized if you're a criminal. Just smile all the time, and it will mess up the facial recognition software, and they'll never figure out who you are.

"The Smiling Serial Rapist strikes again! Untraceable!"

Life in Japan must be tough

[elrous0]

The overcrowding, intense pressure to conform, the legacy of the 90's real estate bust, and now this? Well, at least they have a lot of robots.

Break out the happy helmet

[SendBot]

Sing along everybody...

"Happy happy. Joy joy!"
"Happy happy. Joy joy!"

"I don't think you're happy enough"

"I'll teach you to be happy. I'll teach your grandma to suck eggs!"

"and the little critters of nature. They don't know that they're ugly."

"I TOLD YOU I'D SHOOT, BUT YOU DIDN'T BELIEVE ME!!! WHYYYYY WOULDN'T YOU BELIEVE ME!!!???"

"Happy happy. Joy joy!"
"Happy happy. Joy joy!"

Re:Break out the happy helmet

[Anonymous Coward]

The Happy Happy Joy Joy song! Haven't heard that since Ren & Stimpy.

Re:Break out the happy helmet

[Anonymous Coward]

You just made me smile.

Re:Break out the happy helmet

[pennyloafer]

Heh, that's the first genuine smile I've had today. Thanks.

Re:Break out the happy helmet

[Ren Hoak]

I have nothing to add, but how could I possibly not reply to this.

Thank you for honoring me so!

Re:Break out the happy helmet

[SendBot]

I'll be sure to stay away from your beloved ice cream bar.

a company that cares - that's so sweet

[Tumbleweed]

Beatings will continue until morale improves!
- The Management

ps Have a nice day!

(Seriously, have a nice day, you little piss-ants, OR ELSE.)

Re:a company that cares - that's so sweet

[demo]

The beatings continued even after morale improved.

Re:a company that cares - that's so sweet

[Tumbleweed]

The beatings continued even after morale improved.

Of course - why mess with success?

Twilight Zone

[PriceIke]

This is the creepiest thing I have read in a long time. Is this real? Am I the only one who see this device as the basis of an episode of Rod Serling's Twilight Zone?

Re:Twilight Zone

[Anonymous Coward]

You were glued to SciFi (SyFy by tomorrow) all weekend, weren't you? :) I was!

Re:Twilight Zone

[Escape From NY]

If you don't smile Anthony-san will wish you into the rice paddy.

It's a real good thing that you did, a real good thing.

Re:Twilight Zone

[yoshi_mon]

Just relax and let the hooks do their work.

Hmmm....

[yogibaer]

judging from the mood of the public transport people that I see every day, this gadget must have an additional "mean" and "grumpy" mode for export models.

US customs

[Per Wigren]

This would be a perfect program for US customs!

Not that I have travelled to the US though, but I've heard way too many first hand horror stories to not wanting to go there, ever, for any reason.

Re:US customs

[DNS-and-BIND]

Wow, thanks for taking a story about a Japanese railway and turning into an (ignorant) comment about America.

This thing I describe is horrible! Although I've never actually experienced it, I feel it necessary to reveal my hatred and ignorance in public.

Re:US customs

[Per Wigren]

Ahh, it's always so comical when patriotic persons (of any country) get overly protective. :)

Re:US customs

[DNS-and-BIND]

And it's always so sad when bigoted people enjoy flaunting their ignorant opinions in public. It baffles me.

Re:US customs

[Anonymous Coward]

He's sort of right though. US Customs staff definitely could use a system like this. And not stealing people's stuff. That would help.

Fake smile

[camcorder]

If there's something more annoying than serious looking serviceman, it should be a serviceman with a fake smile. Whoever behind this clever idea should pay more attention to what people expect from services, it is for sure not smiling puppies.

Re:Fake smile

[maugle]

Good point. Is this smile scan able to distinguish between genuine smiles, fake smiles, and scary psychotic "I will kill myself and everyone within a five-meter radius in 4..3..2.." smiles?

Coincidentally

[32771]

Constant smiling is bad for you:

http://www.thaindian.com/newsportal/health/wearing-smile-masks-all-day-at-work-may-lead-to-depression_10016884.html

I wear my scowl with pride.

to many smiles

[Anonymous Coward]

This may be akin to the many Thai smiles that often mean Go F%$# yourself but said with a smile!

If you fail three times...

[Kushieda Minorin]

...you must watch Koume.

Guaranteed to put a smile on anyone's face.

Leave me alone

[Anonymous Coward]

This is insane. Personally I almost never smile, and when I do it is with a closed mouth, I do not show my mouth. I would hate to work at a place like this.
And I always find it creepy when employs at places I go to try and smile at me. The walmart greeters really creep me out, I do not want strange old dudes coming up to talk to me or people coming at me with their fake smiles.

I'd be fired...

[Em Emalb]

I'm not a smiler. My wife gives me hell whenever we take pictures together because I don't smile. I don't like fake smiling. It's stupid and I can tell when someone is faking it. My "fake" smile is stupid looking.

They'd fire me after about a week. And you know what? I'd be cool with that.

Retarded policy, well done, Japanese company.

Re:I'd be fired...

[pclminion]

Why not find a reason to smile for real instead of faking it? I normally smile in pictures with my wife because... I'm in a picture next to my wife. If being next to your wife for a photograph isn't sufficiently pleasant to help you crack a genuine smile I wonder why you married her.

Re:I'd be fired...

[Anonymous Coward]

I also hate it when your wife fakes it.

Re:I'd be fired...

[Em Emalb]

Oh good grief. Sometimes I don't feel like smiling. You see everyone in almost every picture and they've got that big dumb fake smile on their face. That isn't me. Sometimes life isn't all happy-land dude.

Don't presume to know my situation or why I smile or don't smile when I'm in pictures.

Re:I'd be fired...

[pclminion]

So you're a bitter SOB that the world would probably be better off without. Ok then.

What if you buy a smiley face mask...?

[VinylRecords]

What if you buy a smiley face mask and wear it on your face in front of the 'smile detection camera' or whatever it is?

"Sugoi! Score 100. Your smile makes train customers very very happy!"

Omron is the Manufacturer

[beckett]

here's a link to Omron site regarding their Face Recognition software. if anyone can navigate the Japanese site could glean us more information.

i'm wondering if the scanner is using some type of microexpression recognition to determine genuine smiles. I think this would be the state-of-the-art for facial scanners.

Re:Omron is the Manufacturer

[beckett]

as a followup, here is the OAKO Realtime Smile Recognition technology probably being employed in the worker scanning. according to the sparse sites the system can operate without calibration.

Re:Omron is the Manufacturer

[Anonymous Coward]

Pinktentacle.com? On a story about Japan?

No way in hell I'm clicking on that one!

mask

[Beer_Smurf]

Where is a guy fawkes mask when you need it.

Re:mask

[pregister]

Bought up by all the guys hoping Natalie Portman will confuse reality with movies.

Paranoia

[Glith]

Citizen,

The computer has detected a potentially treasonous level of discontent upon recent examination of your facial expressions. Report immediately to your Happiness Officer for re-education.

Stay alert! Keep your laser handy!

[Scutter]

When you are happy, the Computer is happy! When the Computer is happy, you are happy! You are hereby promoted to Blue security clearance. Remain vigilant against the works of muties and communists... and above all, Be A Happy Citizen! Trust the Computer! The Computer is your friend!

Japanese Perfection

[Hercules Peanut]

This is the perfect example of treating a symptom. Smiles represent good feelings and a positive attitude which can very very infectious and so desirable in customer service. However, if someone is "too serious" the response "still to serious" doesn't really help. Perhaps they should consider the root of the issue and try to make their employees genuinely happy.

Another option is to have them all wear smiley face masks :)

Re:Japanese Perfection

[houghi]

Another option is to have them all wear smiley face masks :)

http://www.neatorama.com/2007/07/29/get-a-perfect-smile-in-minutes/ Not sure if this is funny or scary.

Re:Japanese Perfection

[Steneub]

Another option is to have them all wear smiley face masks :)

Hmm...

I thought what I'd do was I'd pretend I was one of those deaf-mutes.

There it is!

Re:Japanese Perfection

[Mashiki]

With the amount of suicides in Japan I'd agree. Things are generally pushed over the top in most areas no matter where you are, so saying they should look at the "whys", and finding the root causes would be a better one, the problem is you're looking at a massive social change. One I don't know if Japan itself is willing to culturally accept right now, while part of the youth is defiantly moving in that direction. The current core of Japanese society isn't.

Re:Japanese Perfection

[TheSpoom]

Clearly they should just inject their employees' faces with botulism.

Re:Japanese Perfection

[Anonymous Coward]

meanwhile my country struggles to get train employees to even do their jobs at all w/o going union this and union that...

"Your smile is perfect, Yoshi!"

[hyades1]

Thought bubble over Yoshi's head:

"It is so easy to smile like this when I think about pulling out Boss-san's intestines with rusty fish knife and feeding them to my dog in front of his dying eyes. His time to visit honourable ancestors comes faster than he thinks.

I am not a morning person

[hairykrishna]

If the smile auditing machine told me I didn't look happy enough, prior to my first work coffee of the day, there's be a serious danger that I'd attack it with a fire axe.

Re:I am not a morning person

[tibman]

Whatever makes you happy, man

Re:I am not a morning person

[Elitist_Phoenix]

Just cover the lenses with back to front smiley face stickers!

Least they will look happy when they kill you.

[Dareth]

Nice to know that with this level of training, even if an employee goes off their rocker and starts killing folks, they will at least look happy while they are doing it!

amateurs

[circletimessquare]

just dose the railway car's air supply with xanax

if you are going to ignore free will, you might as well go all the way

This is a tad silly...

[SBFCOblivion]

They're obviously doing this so that their employees provide a better experience to the customers (as in come off as happier/friendlier).

It is silly though as well as overboard. And from my experience the Japanese are polite/respectful enough that a smile (forced one at that) really isn't needed.

I'll tell you who does need this though: US Customs agents. Seriously. Only instead of measuring the 'smile' factor it should measure power-trip probability and general douchebaggery. Then they can wear the results around all day so we civs will know which agent booths to avoid.

Re:This is a tad silly...

[phantomfive]

When 90% of Americans are angry douchebags, your going to have trouble finding anyone different to be your customs agents. (also, if you don't believe 90% of Americans are angry, read these comments. At least in one particular subset of the population, we are).

The Japanese have a talent

[Weedhopper]

Japan seems like it has a decidedly odd take on things because it's a wealthy, first world nation who's culture is substantially different from the west's.

Just look at Japanese games shows like that human tetris thing. No western TV guys would have come up with that. Different culture.

I, for one, welcome our smiley overloords.

[Anonymous Coward]

::GRIN::

screw that, it hurts too much...

Obligatory Paranoia Reference

[Anonymous Coward]

The Computer is your friend. Happiness is mandatory. Not being happy is treason. Treason is punishable by death. Are you happy? I knew you were.

This Reminds Me Of THX-1138...

[Xin Jing]

People start popping more pills to keep their jobs, smiling more and walking through the day numb. Humans have off days, times when they are not operating at peak capacity. I can't imagine how this system promotes willing compliance more than teams with "pep building" focus meetings at the beginnining of each shift. The smart employees will never smile the true potential, for fear of seldom living up to it each day.

Re:This Reminds Me Of THX-1138...

[rubycodez]

if you have a hard time smiling for the machine, disembowel your supervisor. works for me.

THE COMPUTER IS YOUR FRIEND

[Teunis]

The computer is your friend. Why are you not smiling, citizen?
All citizens must be happy
The computer is your friend

- Paranoia ;)

Article summary = TFA

[jblake]

Is it just me, or does the summary border on non-fair use? I clicked through and TFA was exactly the same as the summary, except for paragraph breaks.

Floyd

[Anonymous Coward]

This reminds me of the adventure game Floyd..

Mod Parent Up

[Anonymous Coward]

Only the fake ones though.

So, if the computer is doing a better job at spotting the fake ones, obviously, it would lead to less depressions.

ching

[Anonymous Coward]

chink chong makka nakka hwyang kwi poo!

Happiness is Mandatory

[DNS-and-BIND]

"DECANTING CITIZEN PERRY-R-ENL-2."

"WELCOME TO ALPHA COMPLEX, PERRY-R-ENL-2. HAPPINESS IS MANDATORY. HAVE A NICE DAYCYCLE."

That voice...It is the voice of authority. I should obey it.

"Thank you, Friend Computer."

"YOUR SUPERVISOR REPORTS THAT YOUR PREVIOUS CLONE, PERRY-R-ENL-1, HAD AN INSUFFICIENT HAPPINESS QUOTIENT. PLEASE REPORT TO RESEARCH AND DESIGN FOR A MALFEASANCE CONTROL DEVICE."

Research and Design... why does the name send shivers down my spine? Is it a half-memory from my previous clone? Or just treasonous rumors?

"Yes, Friend Computer."

The transbot is over there, it can take me to R&D. Just have to remember to keep smiling. Always smile. Happiness is mandatory. Cameras are everywhere. Never stop smiling. You're happy. You're in Alpha Complex, a wonderful place to be, and you're happy. You love Friend Computer. You've never heard of any secret societies. You aren't a dirty mutant. You're happy. Keep smiling. The Computer Is Your Friend. You're happy.

"Says here that your supervisor, Gregor-O, reported insufficient levels of happiness in your prior clone. Is that right, Perry-R?"

This citizen is a YELLOW. Respond to him quickly and humbly. "Yes sir." The lab is stark, bare, metallic. The items clustered on counters and tables are complicated, intricate, dangerous-looking. They are probably above my security clearance; I shouldn't look at them. All of the things in this lab--which one is he picking up? That one?

"This device is called the Joy Adjustment and Monitoring Elevated Device. J.A.M.E.D. for short, of course. Let me just strap this on..."

I can't move, or I'll be terminated for treason. I'm RED and he's YELLOW; I have to let him strap this metal cylinder on my head. Computer knows what it does. Those two arms--

"There we go, nice and snug. And these two little arms here go in the corners of your mouth like-- so. Now, the bot brain in here will monitor you for signs of unhappiness, and correct you into a smile if it detects any. Isn't Friend Computer generous?"

It hurts-- a bit. The wider I smile, the less it hurts. Smile. You're happy. Friend Computer is generous to you. "Yes sir." Keep smiling. Maybe your friends in the society will know how to get it off---ow--but you don't want it off, you're happy that it's on your head. You're happy...

The smell of the food vats is nauseating--ouch--the smell of the food vats is happy. You like working in the food vats. You like working for Gregor-O-ENL-4. You like making the algae that sustains all of Alpha Complex's citizens. You are the backbone of the society. You are important. You are happy. Smile. Smile at Gregor-O.

"You're late to your shift, Perry-R. Are you seeking to damage the efficiency of Alpha Complex?"

His face is unpleasant. And I saw the society propaganda in his office the other day. He's probably a traitor. Ouch-- it's really beginning to hurt, now. If I grimace at the pain, it only pulls up harder. My lips are sore and raw at the corners, my head is heavy with the weight of the bot. He isn't a traitor. You were mistaken. That was just paranoia. He's a loyal, happy citizen, just like you are a loyal, happy citizen. "No sir, Friend--augh-- Gregor-O." They pull up harder. It hurts. It doesn't hurt you, you're happy...

"Then why are you so tardy, Perry-R!?" He's fuming. His face is turning pink. "Production is falling behind because YOU aren't at your station!"

The smile is fading, the machine is pulling, the flesh is ripping. Drops of blood fall to the ground. You should be smiling--but he's making me so angry, he's the treasonous one, I'm the loyal one!

"Sir, might I-- yeagh!--" The pain... It won't stop pulling!

"Citizen! Answer my questions! Or have you been a traitor all along!?"

"No!"

Re:Happiness is Mandatory

[fishie2610]

Flash video of this without the words. http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/165898

Re:Happiness is Mandatory

[Anonymous Coward]

i think you forget that this is japan, and their computer overlords would probably be less like HAL / big brother and more like ohayo kitty; a MALFEASANCE CONTROL DEVICE would more likely be a named a supaa happy happy deebaisuu

This really doesn't surprise me...

[thewils]

The Japanese take their railways seriously, and why not - they probably have the best railway network in the world. Trains are punctual, spotlessly clean and a pleasure to ride on, from the Shinkansen down to the smallest electric tram. The cost from Kyoto to Osaka can be as little as 400yen. Larger stations are packed with shopping and food malls and have a life of their own outside of the railways. You can get from anywhere, to anywhere on the train.

Flanders (oblig.)

[barkingcorndog]

Just relax and let the hooks do their work.

Re:to where?

[Anonymous Coward]

to many smiles

Where the hell is "many smiles"?

Kentucky Fried Chicken

[jimshatt]

Okay, this was in the Netherlands, but a US company. The girl behind the counter had a button saying "if you don't see me smile, you get a free cola". So, not only in Japan (but enforced in a slightly more friendly manner).

Thank god

[Trikenstein]

they didn't do this in Australia

What the hell is wrong with the Japanese

[srobert]

From this article and other business practices that I've heard about in Japan, it seems to me that what is wrong with the the upper management of Japanese organizations is that they get no reality check from the yes men who follow them around. What is wrong with the Japanese working class is they are too spineless to organize and stand up to such bullshit.

Another example...

[Stenchwarrior]

...of Japan being ridiculous in the workplace

They may kick our asses in productivity, but if this is how they obtain such status then they can have it!

Not such a bad idea...

[tyroneking]

... smiling is known to improve one's mood and so even though it sounds really weird to the average morose loner on Slashdot (me included) I think it might actually help. Hell, I'd prefer an employer that encourages me to smile over the usual UK 'fuck-off-and-die minions' attitude.
In India (and spreading across yoga classes in the West) there are laughing clubs (improves mood and health).

We've got bad news, sir

[Anonymous Coward]

The smile-o-tron is broken. We no longer have any mechanism to determine if an employee is smiling; no reports to deliver to the employee regarding his smilitude. What should we do?

Wow, jaded much?

[CaptSaltyJack]

Wow! I looked up "jaded" in the dictionary and a link to your comment came up. Jesus. I think I need to go lie in a bed of flowers and cover myself with bunny rabbits for about an hour to counteract the horrible bitterness of your post.

Re:Wow, jaded much?

[JWSmythe]

    Better order some extra bunnies for tomorrow. I'm having a good day today. :)

    I used to have a poster from despair.com on my office wall.

   

Pretty much

[Unoriginal_Nickname]

The only first-world country with no laws about racial persecution. They are signatories to all of the applicable treaties, of course, but the national and prefecture governments have been playing hot potato with the blame for never ratifying any of them. Meanwhile you have employment, products and services that are unobtainable unless you are a Japanese citizen, born in Japan, pure-blooded Japanese, never lived outside of Japan and also fortunate enough for none of your ancestors to have butchered an animal or buried a dead body.

Mod parent up.

Re:Pretty much

[pegr]

Thanks for the support.

Funny thing is that you were modded up for the "Mod parent up." comment, while my comment sits untouched.

I admit that my screed might come off as an anti-japan racist diatribe from the likes of some right wing AM radio hack. (I listen to NPR, I swear!) But everything I wrote is the honest truth. Don't believe it? Find a japanese person and ask them. No kidding.

In spite of my comments, I find Japan and japanese culture to be wildly facinating. Its very interesting to see how Japan has adapted to maintaining social order with so many people in such a tiny place. Japanese ethnocentricity is SLOWLY falling away. Modern transportation and communication is responsible for the most of it, I believe. But the remnants of old Japan are a frightfully ugly thing.

(I'm thinking about getting the shirt from Jlist that has "Looking for a Japanese girlfriend" on the front in Kanji. ;)

Re:Pretty much

[Repossessed]

"The only first-world country with no laws about racial persecution."

They did outlaw discrimination based on blood type though! That they even needed that law is pretty terrifying though.

Re:Pretty much

[Anonymous Coward]

Yeah, you find a bunch of them around Aidzuwakamatsu.

Your comment? Bullshit, that's really all there is to say about it.

Re:Pretty much

[sonicmerlin]

Yes well, it's good to know that you think the loss of a unique culture is a benefit to the world. Simply because they don't follow what you believe to be right and wrong (politically correct) in this modern day and age, it's better than their old traditions fade away. I'm sure you'd like all the races to intermingle and form one bland homogenous race too, right? That would explain the "I want a Japanese girlfriend" T-shirt. You think the differences are merely cultural? How about the study demonstrating 3 distinct world-wide genetic groups? How about studies demonstrating consistent differences among those groups in various personality and cultural attributes across the world? Let me put it this way. White women will cheat on you at some point with certainty. Whether you're at war or at some day job. An Asian woman will appreciate even the smallest things you provide her and always be faithful. Exceptions exist, but in general this holds true. So screw you and your neo imperialistic attitude.

Re:Pretty much

[Anonymous Coward]

What a surprise, you're a racist.

Let us know when you leave the 1800s.

Re:Pretty much

[GameboyRMH]

I always thought it was odd that when reading Japanese fictional character bios, the blood type is often included (one example I remember is the FF7 manual). What's up with that, I wondered? Well now I had to look it up.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blood_types_in_Japanese_culture
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/02/01/in-japan-your-blood-type-_n_162917.html

tl;dr version: Like astrology, but taken seriously by much of the population.

Re:Pretty much

[pegr]

Yes, I think the loss of (certain) cultures is a good thing. Slavery, male dominance, racial superiority, debtors prisons, monarchies, etc, are all things that we can do without. (Good thing I didn't mention Nazis, or I would have Godwinned myself. Wait, DAMN...)

In your defense, yes, there are certain attributes associated with various genetic groups e.g. asians tend to be smaller than europeans, etc. But to suggest that all white women are cheaters? That's not even a good troll. Try again n00b.

Re:Pretty much

[sonicmerlin]

"In graduate school, genetics students typically are taught that 5 to 15 percent of the men on birth certificates are not the biological fathers of their children. In other words, as many as one of every seven men who proudly carry their newborn children out of a hospital could be a cuckold." If that many women are cheating often enough to become pregnant, not abort, and have babies outside of their relationships, just what % of white women (especially married ones) do you think have actually cheated at least once in their life? Many behavioral studies demonstrate consistent differences in behavior, personalities, and predispositions among the three major genetic groups. No one ever talks about these studies because they're politically incorrect, but they're available to read if you actively seek them out. Your beliefs about "equality" of gender are inherently flawed, as any rational and objective person could cite inherent inequalities in the Western law system that favors women over men. I'm sure it's fun to declare the status quo of thousands of years of cultural and biological evolution as defunct, but it's merely an egoistic exercise in Western arrogance. Democracy is itself a specifically limited form of government that pits various groups against each other, compromising the effectiveness and ideals of all the groups. Ultimately in the long run the irrational chaotic immorality of the masses comes to dominate the political subculture, maiming those few truly idealistic people. Many Asians, especially those not subject to modern Western cultural imperialism, aren't even comfortable with such a notion as a people-run government. Even in democracies such as Japan, the power and scope of government and the trust of people in the government to run their lives is far greater than in Western nations.

Demolition Man

[mrslacker]

Be well John Spartan.

I dont wanna work there...

[tech_fixer]

Gives a whole new meaning to "Service with a smile".

Japanese culture aside,

[nausea_malvarma]

...what is wrong with being sad? Why must we be happy all the time? Sometimes sadness is a natural response to the sad things in the world. If something is wrong, I don't want to pretend to be happy about it. Sadness tells us something is wrong, and motivates us to do something about it.

I understand employees are expected to smile more in japan out of politeness, but why force employees to smile harder? If they aren't smiling, perhaps the problem is their job. A sure way to encourage smiling is to treat employees better, and make them feel loved.

Re:Japanese culture aside,

[Jamie Lokier]

If they aren't smiling, perhaps the problem is their job

Perhaps the problem is something else in their life. Sad things happen. Family members die, that sort of thing.

Forcing people who are sad for a reason to pretend to be happy seems like it would lead to depression. It's forcing if you have to do it to keep your job.

(Encouring smiles for well-being as a personal choice, on the other hand, may be of benefit as some studies have shown).

I think that when I'm sad for a reason, I'm happier being sad than pretending or "trying" to be happy, and I'm happier with a sad face for some of the time than a "happy" face, because it better reflects what I'm dealing with inside.

Phew!

[g34rs]

Phew, good thing I work in America!
...wait a minute, Hitachi is a Japanese company. *gulp*

No it is not.

[Bragador]

A Chuckle a Day Keeps the Doctor Away: Therapeutic Humor and Laughter

Journal of Psychosocial Nursing and Mental Health Services Vol. 42 No. 3 March 2004

http://www.jpnonline.com/view.asp?rID=4910

Inquiring minds want to know...

[Rufty]

What happens when this thing gets mooned?

Re:Inquiring minds want to know...

[SoVeryTired]

"Please make your smile wider"...

Joker Smile = Plastic Surgery

[peter303]

At least in the Tim Burton version with Jack Nicholson. Maybe the government will force us all to have this surgery.

Smiling makes people happy

[butabozuhi]

http://health.howstuffworks.com/human-nature/emotions/happiness/science/smiling-happy1.htm Happy people are more productive. Kind of a neat idea that would be difficult to implement in a company that wasn't service oriented.

Japan is not the most happiest place in the world

[$criptah]

According to the results of the survey aimed to determine the most happiest countries Japan was number 90 (as opposed to the United States at position 114). In fact most of the developed countries did rather poorly due to the fact that consumer oriented economies eventually turn people into unhappy slaves. We constantly need to chase the results of the next quarter and increase productivity. At some point people stop giving shit about the actual meaning of life and proceed to exist. Existence, if you ask me, is not a happy state and some industries have to force individuals to smile. Is this the answer? Fuck no.

If you want me to smile and be happy, give me an extra day off, a bonus or guarantee the fact that I can see a doctor even if I don't have insurance. You can take the 5-bedroom 3-garage houses back to late 90s because life called and it wants me back.

Sounds like

[SnarfQuest]

It sounds like Obama's nanny-state plans are further ahead in Japan than they are in the US. How long before he does an executive order to implement this in all US businesses?

Re:Sounds like

[Anonymous Coward]

Awww, shuddup and smile, you bozos lost, get over it.

satisfying the customer

[Anonymous Coward]

Try flying Singapore Air vs United. It is much more pleasant. Satisfy the customer, and you will get more business. Americans need to compete in the global economy. This attitude of complaining and we can be rude just because isn't going to cut it. Well, we just end up like the French, but without the wine, art, and romance language classification.

Not just Japan

[Anonymous Coward]

This sort of thing isn't restricted to Japan; I bet most airlines have similar guidelines for their staff, and I know some banks here in the UK have similar things.

(I know one has a 'weather system' rating for their staff, and they are expected to maintain at least a 'sunny' rating while they are dealing with customers).

I've no doubt that many companies that have any significant customer relations/service focus will have something like this in their company policies.

Mine don't but our unions are evil bitter bastards >:P

Happiness can get you yelled at.

[meerling]

Guess they've never had someone jump down their throat for being cheerful.

I have.

A lot of Americans associate a business attitude with a neutral or even stern expression.
That person smiling all the time is assumed to be an idiot, disingenuous, or high.
Yes, smiling can be bad.

If done right this isn't a bad idea.

[seekret]

At first this seems really weird, especially the part about scanning the smile coming into work. But having worked in customer service for many years I can say that it's not exactly a bad idea, sometimes you just forget that you should be smiling and customers think you are being indifferent even if you are genuinely trying to help them. So a little reminder everyday that you should smile more often can go a long way. I would change the system a bit to monitor the smiles while actually interacting with customers, that way you can have another tool for seeing how you handled a situation that may go badly. If used properly this is an asset for the individual employees as well as the company in general.

another reason

[nixish]

reason #15 i would not think about living and working in Japan...

Can it tell the difference?

[BlackSabbath]

Can the program tell the difference between a "what a wonderful world" smile and a "if I get told to smile any harder I'm going to disembowel my next customer" smile?

I would be so happy if...

[Anonymous Coward]

If the company I work for instead of giving everyone a minor raise each quarter, year, or whatever wasted the money to see how pissed off and bored I am working a most likely dead end hopeless pathetic excuse for a job.
Also a good solution take a picture of yourself with a camera phone grinning like a idiot. For extra measure open up photoshop and make yourself look like the biggest smiling dumbass ever. Upload it back to your trendy japanese camera phone. Hold camera phone up to stupid camera. Recieve an award, raise, and promotion to senior VP.

Long term effects?

[pak9rabid]

Serenity now, insanity later..

Re: better behaved and quiet?

[amiga500]

"quiet?" You've obviously never been on a Friday night SWA flight to Las Vegas.

Hidily-ho slavorinos!

[Thelasko]

This reminds me of that Simpsons Tree House of Horror episode where Flanders was the unquestioned lord and master of the universe.

SHARE AND ENJOY!

[Philip K Dickhead]

Share and enjoy,
Journey through life
With a plastic boy
Or girl by your side
Let your pal be your guide
Go stick your head in a pig

Smiling is mandatory

[matria]

Brings back memories of my wonderful childhood, when my father would beat me and my mother if we didn't smile and sing enough; he was going to have a happy home if it killed us.

Re:Japan is not the most happiest place in the wor

[Jamie Lokier]

On the other hand, that survey doesn't rank happiness.

It ranks happiness divided by environmental footprint.

A worthy ranking, but it's not ranking happiness.

Re:Japan is not the most happiest place in the wor

[4D6963]

In fact most of the developed countries did rather poorly due to the fact that consumer oriented economies eventually turn people into unhappy slaves.

Utter bullshit, you need to read into what you post. The Happy Planet Index isn't about people's actual happiness but, as Wikipedia puts it, "in fact a measure of the ecological efficiency of supporting well-being". Hence the term "Happy Planet", it's the planet that's happy, not the people, hence why the USA ranks poorly.

You need to look at a more direct measurement, such as the Satisfaction with Life Index and oh surprise the USA ranks 23rd and the majority of the top countries are "consumer oriented economies", too bad, your point just falls apart.

Weird, scary

[riffraff]

Reminds me of a book by John De Chancie, one of the Castle books. In it, Gene is dumped in a world with InnerVoice (tm), which is a virus which monitors your endocrine system and whatnot for "guilty" feelings (such as raised heart rate, sweating, stuff like that). If you feel guilty, it starts giving you bad cramps and other things until you "adjust" your behavior. Someone said "put a smile on your face", but he didn't at first, until the cramps and other pains came. When he did, it went away.

Re:Japan is not the most happiest place in the wor

[4D6963]

Correction : the USA actually ranks 16th ex-aequo.

I wonder how it characterizes a smile...

[cadu]

I'm living in Japan for 3 years now and 90% of the people i see in the streets (any age!) have at least some misaligned/missing/black/rotten/decayed/cavity-laden but untreated teeth.... o_O

This must be some extreeeeeeemely advanced piece of software engineering, because for me, all of them would score lower as they open their mouths T__T

PS: Did i say something about their breath? and did i say i see those pretty teeth in a lot of women too? no wonder why girls cover their mouths here when they smile here (cultural thing my ass :D)

Anonymous

[Anonymous Coward]

Hi, Pingugirl here.

Sorry, I don't feel like creating an account.

I just wanted to say as a 3rd generation Japanese-Canadian, I LOVE this!

I agree that Fake smiles are bad for you but this seems to measure whether or not it's a true smile. Fake smiles often are only made with the mouth and there is no movement in the eye area.

This is an easy way to check your happiness on a daily basis.

The fact that it's mandatory is a bit creepy, but it is Japan after all. There's plenty of other more strange things happening there.

Happy Smiles are a good thing in my books.

Yay for Mental Health Checks!

Individuels, slaves, and you.

[cenc]

Strange, you think what Japanese conformity is doing is all that different from Western culture.

This has worked to organize armies of every country and every race for several thousand years. It has worked so well, companies started adopting it almost as soon as the idea of the company was developed. Yes, eliminating the individuals desires for increased productivity seems to work very well. The Asian cultures have been doing it for thousands of years. You know back when Europeans were still swinging wooden clubs in the caves.

Why do you think armies are built first at boot camp? It is not to teach people how to clean a gun. It is to teach them to conform.

Why do you think everyone at Wall Mart has the same colored clothing on. It is to make them conform, work as a group, comply.

The concept of the individual, with individual rights, is a fairly new invention even in the West. Like only the last few hundred years new (even the last few decades for many). The Individual is something for "citizens" in the Roman sense of citizen, kings, emperors, lords, but not for slaves, surfs, cogs, employees, and other low life's of society. There are owners and their are the owned. Most of the World, falls in to the owned catagory in spite of what mommy and daddy tried to convince you of regarding being an individuel (while also telling you not to be).

It still is something relatively unique in most of the World, and I might venture to most of you that think of yourself as "an individual with rights and freedoms" to stop for a second, check your delusion at the door, and think long and hard about just how free you really are. It might scare you to find out that you too had your individuality most likly beaten out of you one way or another. Right down to the way you put you select which words to put together has developed over thousands of years to force to you to conform to a cultural norm of what is correct and mistaken. Even your reaction to the oddity of Japanese culture, is in part the oddity of your own cultural conditioning. The Western has its own "smile machine" known as "freedom". If you use the word "freedom" sufficiently, you will get a good smiley report. Does not mean you actually ARE any more free or even any more aware of your condition than your average Japanese standing in front of the machine.

O.k. I am sure I am going to get an lot of shit for this. Please let the lashing begin. Still, there is nothing in what I said that is any less true, in spite of all our egos.

Re:Individuels, slaves, and you.

[greyhueofdoubt]

>>It might scare you to find out that you too had your individuality most likly beaten out of you one way or another.

Well right there you took one issue and turned it into another. Determinism vs free will is not an argument that will be solved on slashdot. You can say that I have no free will because I use words and sentence structures *other people* made up, but I say I'm choosing the most efficient way of communicating with people.

If you call language and customs/courtesies an infringement of freedom, well, you might as well consider not being able to grow a rocket out of your ass an infringement of your freedom.

You need to define "free" and "individual" before you start telling me that I am neither.

-b

Re:Individuels, slaves, and you.

[Jesus_666]

If you call language and customs/courtesies an infringement of freedom, well, you might as well consider not being able to grow a rocket out of your ass an infringement of your freedom.

Well, I do! When I was a little dyslexic boy I always wanted a rocketshit.

been there

[type40]

I worked at a coffee shop for a time and the owner wanted to implement something similar. If we didn't smile and say the little schpeel when we greeted a customer, they would get a free muffin.
After he finished explaining the policy to me I told him I was going to repeat what I heard.
"If I talk to the customers (whose happiness I place a higher value on than yours) with a straight face, they get a free muffin."

Yup, that job didn't last long.

And now your final question:

[Kingrames]

Who is indisputably the most important person in Vault 101: He who shelters us from the harshness of the atomic wasteland, and to whom we owe everything we have, including our lives?

A) The Overseer.
B) The Overseer.
C) The Overseer.
D) The Overseer.

And it's as secure as biometrics

[matrixskp]

Jut smile really hard that first day (using sellotape to get the cheeks up to that 100% happy manic smile if you need to) and then hold the print out up to the camera for the rest of the year. Do I get a salary raise for having a 100% smile all year? ... probably not.

Re:America is insane.

[Anonymous Coward]

But were better than Japs right? right? O_O ohhh every time I look at www.stopthehunger.com I yell USA-USA-USA RUMSFELD!!!!!!111111!

Stop believing you're some kind of standard you fucking self righteous mass-assassin environment leech American retard (TM)(C)(R)(#1)

Yet another reason...

[rakslice]

...why mandatory drug testing regimes for railroad employees should be extended to railroad management.

They're all evil communist dictators!

[ZirconCode]

You people do not understand the Japanese Culture and I'm shocked at how racist you behave!

----------

@pegr
>>Japan, one of the most racist and nationalistic societies left on the planet

I doubt that! In Japan even a different hair colour is not something they make fun about or detest, in fact they actually think it's beautiful and they often dye their own hair to look blond.

>>There is no consideration of fairness, only service to the greater good, as defined by the politics of the day

Have you ever lived there recently? They pick up trash if it gets left in the train by someone else. I haven't seen that anywhere else.Yes it is for the greater good to care about your environment and community, but is there anything wrong with that? NO! In fact the greater _good_ is surprisingly, GOOD!

>>It is bad and/or weird.

Oh it's weird? There's racism for you!

@Unoriginal_Nickname

>>no laws about racial persecution

They don't need them, that's why there are none.

>>products and services that are unobtainable unless you are a Japanese citizen, born in Japan, pure-blooded Japanese, never lived outside of Japan and also fortunate enough for none of your ancestors to have butchered an animal or buried a dead body

This can be compare to the European tradition of burning "witches". They are traditions from the middle age and just because you are ignorant doesn't mean they are still practised today.

@Repossessed

>>They did outlaw discrimination based on blood type though! That they even needed that law is pretty terrifying though.

No it's not. Almost every Japanese person know their blood type and for them it's like a skin colour. It's different, not terrifying.

---------

And to top of this roundhouse kick,
Why do you think the Japanese have superior technology even though they where cut of from the rest of the world for a long time of their history?

Is it because they're superior? Hmm?

-----------

Yes, I currently reside in Japan.
No, I'm not Japanese.

Japan is insane, but so are gaijin.

[kklein]

One question: How is your Japanese?

Because every time--every time--I hear someone blathering on about how racist Japan is, it's someone who can barely carry on a conversation, and who is almost completely illiterate.

I'm just sayin'.

Now, let me temper that with this: Yes, there are some things that need to be worked on (piss-testing foreigners in Roppongi is really disturbing, but... Well, they wouldn't be piss-testing them if they thought that they wouldn't get a lot of them on drug violations), but over all my life is just fine. In fact, it's great. I have a well-paying job and a nice apartment and Japanese food is the best. I want for naught.

The foreigner community has just as much work ahead of them to more peacefully assimilate into the host community as the host community has to challenge some of their racist notions and policies. Just as a "driving while black" story loses much of its punch when it ends with "and then they found a little pot I was taking to the party," a "walking while foreign" story shouldn't end with "and then they found out that I forgot that my visa had expired." Foreigners are mistreated here, yes, but many of them mistreat the locals. They act like the Loyola researcher in this Slashdot story, and are similarly flummoxed when the absolutely predictable occurs.

To all the foreigners in Japan reading this, please, for all of us:

• Learn Japanese. And not just enough to nampa a chick in Roppongi and order a beer. Actually learn how to read. Kanji. English is not the language of Japan; Japanese is. I'm sorry if someone told you otherwise. That person was wrong. No one is under any obligation whatsoever to provide all services to you in your native language. Only English speakers would be so arrogant as to need to be told this.
• Pay your taxes. Don't try to game the system when you leave the country.
• Cancel your cellphone service and pay what you owe. Don't just leave.
• Pay your incidental fees when you change apartments. Yes, renter law here is utterly ridiculous, but when you take off without paying, it makes it harder for others to get a place (which is probably why you're bitter about your apartment in the first place!).
• For god's sake put your goddamn visa expiry date on your goddamn calendar. There is no excuse for overstaying, and even if nothing comes of it, your overstay will be logged as "foreigner crime" which will let the cops bug us without anybody caring.
• When you move, update your address on your gaijin card. This isn't a foreign-only thing, guys. Japanese people have to do it too. If you don't like the government knowing where you live, leave. That is the law here.
• Get a Japanese driver's license. Stop whining and waving the little gray paper with you picture taped to it that you bought at AAA for ten bucks that says you can drive a car on holiday. That is not a license. Go get a real license. It is not that hard, because all you really have to do (if you're American) is get your US license translated, pass a silly multiple-choice test in English, and drive around a little car obstacle course. If you're from any other English-speaking country, it's even easier (since US driver's licenses are handled at the state level and the states' rules are different, Japan makes Americans take a slightly longer test--not true for other countries). It's easy. And it's the law.
• Don't do illegal drugs. Seriously, guys. At least wait until holiday if you really want to. The laws are strict here, but be thankful Japan is enlightened enough not to hang you, like some other Asian countries. Just don't do it in Japan. If you do, you are a stupid person.
• For the love of god don't make sexual remarks to or about every woman you see. People's foreign-language listening proficiency always far outstrips their speaking ability. They know what you are saying

Re:Japan is insane, but so are gaijin.

[dintech]

I've been to Roppongi a couple of times and found it to be very different from anywhere else in Japan - in a bad way. I'm not surprised at the drug testing because the way foreigners behave there is hard to understand even for me. The guys trying to drag you into their hostess bars are also really annoying.

Thanks for your post, again it's good to see your perspective on things. I often read your posts relating to life in Japan and falways find them very interesting. More of the same please!

Re:Japan is insane, but so are gaijin.

[furby076]

One question: How is your Japanese? Because every time--every time--I hear someone blathering on about how racist Japan is, it's someone who can barely carry on a conversation, and who is almost completely illiterate.

Now that's a logical fallacy if I've ever heard one. Not knowing how to speak/write a language does not make you incapable of studying/understanding the society. A lot of people do not know how to read/write ancient hebrew - but they still understand the society. I was born in Israel, I grew up in the US, I know how to speak Hebrew but not how to read/write it. I guess I only understand half of Israeli culture?

Re:Japan is insane, but so are gaijin.

[BoothbyTCD]

You forgot to include 'Don't be Chinese' on that list. Also 'Don't have Korean ancestry' and 'Don't come from a family that used to be tanners'.

Re:Japan is insane, but so are gaijin.

[greyhueofdoubt]

Only English speakers would be so arrogant as to need to be told this.

ORLY?

http://feinstein.senate.gov/public/index.cfm?FuseAction=EnEspanol.Home

I'm a lot more tired of the filthy roundeyes trashing the place.

Oh, go fu... Never mind. Not even worth arguing with whatever fetish you have w/ japanese culture. I had a friend like that growing up. It's so incredibly racist- but it sounds like you found the place you were looking for.

How can you live your life knowing that everyone around you looks down on you just for the color of your skin? Or do you just ignore that?

Sorry for ranting but this isn't the first holier-than-thou post I've seen from you arguing about how rosy things are in japan. One look at their crammed trains makes me want to crawl out of my skin, I don't care how 'polite' their culture is.

-b

Re:Japan is insane, but so are gaijin.

[eheien]

I speak Japanese fluently. I have lived in Japan for about 6 years, currently enrolled at one of the "Top 3" public universities. I can read a newspaper in Japanese. I have given lectures in Japanese on theoretical computer science. I pay my taxes, I renew my visa on time. I don't do any of the other illegal or questionable things on your list.
Having said that, the grandparent is completely correct - Japan and Japanese are extremely racist, xenophobic and nationalistic. That's part of the reason why I'm leaving as soon as I finish my degree. You might think (as I did) if you learn the language and culture you'll be accepted - you're wrong. In Japan you will always be judged and discriminated against because you are not Japanese. It doesn't matter if it's in the city vs. countryside, company vs. university, public vs. private.
If you can tolerate being treated as a second class citizen, being denied housing/employment/services because of your skin color, being treated as an idiot incapable of understanding even basic Japanese, then feel free to come to Japan. If not, then avoid it.

I'm gonna hurt you...

[3.5 stripes]

Thanks to your link I've now got diabeetus!!!

Uh?

[Anonymous Coward]

What's next? Switch Japanese for Newspeak? The Thought Police? We are already past 1984, damn it!

Makes me think of a certain animation

[Ehwaz003]

Seen the animation a while ago, but it still gives a good view of what forced smiling could end up to when placed in the wrong hands...

http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/165898