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Amazon Worker Jumps Off Company Building After Email Note (bloomberg.com)

An anonymous reader writes: An Amazon employee was injured when he leaped off a building at the company's Seattle headquarters in what police characterized as a suicide attempt. The man, who wasn't identified by authorities, sent an e-mail visible to hundreds of co-workers, including Chief Executive Officer Jeff Bezos, before the incident occurred, according to a report on Bloomberg. The man survived the fall from Amazon's 12-story Apollo building at about 8:45 a.m. local time Monday and was taken to a Seattle hospital, police said. The man had recently put in a request to transfer to a different department, but was placed on an employee improvement plan, a step that can lead to termination if performance isn't improved, said the person, who asked not to be identified discussing company personnel matters. More than 20,000 people work in multiple buildings at Amazon's headquarters.

392 comments

  1. I wouldn't work there. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    From the various anecdotes I've heard about Amazon, I sure as hell wouldn't want to work there.

    1. Re:I wouldn't work there. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      Given that the overall suicide rate is 13 per 100,000 people annually, Amazon seems to be preventing suicides.

    2. Re:I wouldn't work there. by show+me+altoids · · Score: 5, Funny

      This wasn't a suicide attempt, he was trying to get a job as a drone.

      --
      I feel sorry for people that don't drink, because when they get up in the morning, that's as good as they're gonna feel
    3. Re: I wouldn't work there. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      A cliche joke at Amazon's executive office, isn't it? Sick

    4. Re:I wouldn't work there. by ArmoredDragon · · Score: 1

      Remember, only YOU can refuse a job offer from Amazon.

      https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/...

    5. Re:I wouldn't work there. by jellomizer · · Score: 4, Insightful

      Working for any big organization if you get in the wrong unit, with the wrong set of managers you job is hell. If you get in the right spot, your job may be great, until that manager moves to a different unit.

      --
      If something is so important that you feel the need to post it on the internet... It probably isn't that important.
    6. Re: I wouldn't work there. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Does it hurt to be that big of an asshole?

    7. Re:I wouldn't work there. by Grishnakh · · Score: 2

      Yeah, it's really not that different from working in a small company really. If you get a good manager and company, a small company can be great. If you get a bad manager and/or company, it can be hell. A big company is basically like a bunch of small companies all stuck together and sharing an HR department and facilities.

      The main advantages I've seen with bigger companies are

      1) they tend to be much better about avoiding certain problems that could cost them big in legal fees, namely harassment. You don't hear a lot of off-color jokes at the big companies because employees are thoroughly trained to avoid that behavior, and management will come down strongly on employees for it, whereas at small companies people get away with a lot more, especially management. Closely related, there frequently tends to be more of a boy's club atmosphere at the small companies.

      2) in a big company, it's easier to move around. At a small company, if it sucks, you just have to find a new job. But moving around at the big company isn't all that great since your pay doesn't go up, whereas when you change jobs, usually you can look forward to at least a little pay bump.

    8. Re:I wouldn't work there. by ClickOnThis · · Score: 2

      Have you ever been out of work? Sometimes you take what you can get.

      --
      If it weren't for deadlines, nothing would be late.
    9. Re:I wouldn't work there. by 93+Escort+Wagon · · Score: 4, Interesting

      I've known a couple people who (briefly) went to work for Amazon because they were offered a really good salary... then learned that the reason the salary was so high was a corporate expectation of 70-80 hour work weeks plus basically 24/7 on call availability.

      So if you ever hear Bezos talking about needing more H1-Bs because of a "lack of skilled workers", be sure to note he's got a different definition of "skilled" than you or I do. I don't personally think a willingness to give up one's entire existence should be considered a skill - but maybe that's just me.

      --
      #DeleteChrome
    10. Re:I wouldn't work there. by lactose99 · · Score: 1

      I don't personally think a willingness to give up one's entire existence should be considered a skill - but maybe that's just me.

      This, THIS, so much this!

      --
      Fully licensed blockchain psychiatrist
    11. Re:I wouldn't work there. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I suggest he wraps nets around the building and tell the other goy to get back to work. Oh wait, I do not buy anything at amazon for a reason. Perhaps you guys will learn before its to late.

    12. Re:I wouldn't work there. by SirMasterboy · · Score: 2

      I have, and I still turned down positions that weren't what I was looking for because I knew the importance of choosing a place that I actually wanted to work at.

      I could afford to do this because I have a large savings that exists for these sorts of times.

      I had a large savings because previously I lived within my means or more accurately I lived below my means so that I could quickly grow a large savings exactly for these sorts of purposes in the future.

      It's all just a part of careful planning in my experience and you always have to plan for the worst cases.

    13. Re:I wouldn't work there. by networkBoy · · Score: 1

      Just left Intel recently as part of their "realignment" after 17 years.
      I have had some of the best managers there, but recently (and the reason for my exit) was one of the foulest most demeaning managers I've ever worked for (not the worst, that was a white South African who bragged about beating confessions out of black people while he was a cop there), but pretty damn close.

      The other good quality about a large company (now that I'm at a tiny 40 something person company) is better retirement plans and better healthcare plans (in the USA at least).

      --
      whois gawk date unzip strip find touch finger mount join nice man top fsck grep eject more yes exit umount sleep dump
    14. Re:I wouldn't work there. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Cool story, bro. Good thing no one ever gets kicked out at age 18 with no options or connections.

    15. Re:I wouldn't work there. by RabidReindeer · · Score: 2

      And then one day, you find your large savings has become a small savings. And it's dwindling fast.

      There's this thing that many people do when their large savings has truly become large enough to live on indefinitely. It's called "retire".

    16. Re:I wouldn't work there. by SirMasterboy · · Score: 1

      I very much doubt that would happen to an extent where I couldn't do anything to adjust.

      If for some reason it started to happen I would radically downscale my quality of living. I have already found from experience that I can comfortably live on quite a small amount.

      I don't think it's very realistic to have to look for a job for more than a year and not find one that I would be happy to take. As long as I keep my savings large enough to cover my cost of living for a year then I have given myself that timeframe to find something. And if not, I can downscale my living to stretch it longer if need be.

      Of course I'm not saying that it's impossible and would always 100% work out, but the odds should not be high that I wouldn't find something I would be happy with in the timeframe i've worked to set up for myself.

    17. Re:I wouldn't work there. by HornWumpus · · Score: 2

      70-80 hour weeks are less productive than 40-50 hour weeks. In anything but the very short run.

      In pure rote roles it might work for a little longer, but in a couple of months the 80/week worker is a net negative producer.

      Willingness to work 80 hour weeks is a sign of someone who doesn't care about doing good work. Companies full of 80 hour/week people are waiting to implode.

      Lawyers don't actually work 80 hours/week, they might bill 160 but work 50. Also note: (many/most/all) law firms have a business plan that involves not telling associates they will never make partner, purely to work them into the ground.

      --
      John McAfee 'It was like that time I hired that Bangkok prostitute; to do my taxes, while I fucked my accountant'
    18. Re: I wouldn't work there. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Does it hurt to be so naive?

    19. Re: I wouldn't work there. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I learned that the hard way a few years back. I took a promotion with a big bump in pay. I don't remember that summer. I was on call just about every week and OT was expected. I took a big pay cut to leave but in the long run has been worth it.

    20. Re:I wouldn't work there. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Guess what, sunshine, EVERYBODY else also thinks that it can't happen to them. The percentage of long-term unemployed who weren't actively beating the drums and grinding to find something else is very small. But go ahead, enjoy your confirmation bias that you're special and it can't happen to you.

      However, I would suggest that if you find yourself unemployed without another job in hand you drop every cost in your life that isn't survival related until you find another job. And in this economy it's much more likely to become a gig. Because you'll kick yourself later when you needed that money to buy food or have electricity.

    21. Re: I wouldn't work there. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Hey snowflake -

      THE ODDS DON'T ALWAYS WORK OUT

      Sometimes your kid is born with down syndrome or your mother has a stroke and needs full time care from the paralysis or the fucking CEO literally runs off with the company 401k money. Good preparation does not prevent life from fucking you up. I'm glad you got your shit together but stop smugly looking down on people in a bad position. Sometimes it ain't their fault.

    22. Re:I wouldn't work there. by laie_techie · · Score: 2

      I have, and I still turned down positions that weren't what I was looking for because I knew the importance of choosing a place that I actually wanted to work at.

      When I was on unemployment insurance (shortly after the 9/11 attacks), I had to answer a questionnaire every week before getting my check. One of the questions was if I refused a job offer. Refusing a job offer would disqualify me for unemployment for two weeks. I would preemptively say something at the end of the interview about it not looking like a good fit before an offer could be extended.

    23. Re: I wouldn't work there. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Jealous much? Just because you can post on a blog doesn't make you smart. Those folks from India work harder, more cooperatively, and with a lot less complaining as one gets from their lazy American counterparts who seem to think that because we have milky pale skin and can only speak one language we are entitled to 100k$ jobs.

      LAZY. Get off your lazy hump, get off the internet, and get an education and develop some marketable skills.

    24. Re: I wouldn't work there. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      Sometimes. But most of the time, it is their fault.

    25. Re: I wouldn't work there. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Informative

      Agreed. I have 2 friends who work there doing kernel related dev for AWS, not only are they paid ridiculously well (before you even take stock options into account even), they rarely have complaints that aren't just stock standard for a massive company (like some managers being useless, underperforming coworkers, etc).

    26. Re:I wouldn't work there. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Worked for me. I sucked it up for twenty years, lived frugally and retired.

      So while the rest of you are going to your happy jobs, I'm sipping margarita at 11am when I wake up, watching the birds play in the tree while planning my next 'vacation' to mexico.

      Remember...you are not your job

    27. Re:I wouldn't work there. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Keep repeating to yourself, free will does not exist.

    28. Re:I wouldn't work there. by nnull · · Score: 1

      Isn't that every company lately? If it's not that, it's the other extreme, they expect you to work for minimum wage and expect miracles like a 30 year experienced engineer.

    29. Re:I wouldn't work there. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Insightful

      if you ever hear Bezos talking about needing more H1-Bs because of a "lack of skilled workers",

      I'd go a step further than you suggest. When you hear an executive of a large company saying that there are a "lack of skilled workers" in the USA, it always, inevitably, without exception has an asterisk that they don't want to utter out loud: There is a lack of skilled workers willing to work at the offered level of pay.

      It's not up to me to dictate what a company should pay their workers. But I absolutely think that H1-Bs should be incredibly expensive to obtain. If a company absolutely cannot obtain a skill from an American citizen living in the USA and must import (or offshore) that employee, then they better pay out the ass for it. I'd suggest 4x the wage they'd pay a non-H1B in the same job, at a minimum level of $200k annually, with that minimum tied to 1.5x the rate of inflation. Make. Them. Pay.

      It would be best if employers tried to solve this "lack of skilled workers" by helping subsidize a set of skilled workers locally, and I'm all for the idea of evil Big Government to coerce companies into investing in our economy, instead of gambling with it.

    30. Re:I wouldn't work there. by pr0fessor · · Score: 1

      It's not the things you plan for that get you it's things that you thought you planned for like multiple surgeries in just a couple years that even after your insurance pays the majority of the cost is still far more expensive than you think it should ever be as you now have a new $100k debt.

    31. Re:I wouldn't work there. by luis_a_espinal · · Score: 1

      Isn't that every company lately? If it's not that, it's the other extreme, they expect you to work for minimum wage and expect miracles like a 30 year experienced engineer.

      No. Not every company, small or large is like that. I speak from experience, as I've worked with good companies and bad ones. In fact, in many cases, it is not even the company but the department you worked on.

    32. Re:I wouldn't work there. by SirMasterboy · · Score: 1

      OK, but that's where we are going with the reasonable odds part of it.

      I did mention it's not a 100% certainty that anyone can prevent having to take a crap job even with good planning, but how many of the people who are complaining about choosing a job they don't like are in that situation because they are in debt from health issues rather than in debt because they lived beyond their means and didn't plan well for the future.

      My money would be on far more people picked a crap job so they could have more fun and have spending money over picked a crap job because they are in debt from health issues.

      For instance, making 80K a year but living like you make 50K a year for awhile can allow you to get yourself into the position to be able to go long periods without work to allow you to find the job you really want over being forced to take something because you need money now.

      For me I choose to operate like that because I would rather have a job that I love than live in a bigger house or have a nicer car etc.

      If you choose to go for the big house and fancy car, but have to always be in work in order to pay for it all then I find it hard to have sympathy for you when you complain about having to take a crappy job because you need it and need money now.

      I chose my path and it makes me happy, you choose your path and it makes you miserable, maybe you should rethink your choices. That's all I'm trying to get at in a general sense.

    33. Re:I wouldn't work there. by haruchai · · Score: 1

      "not the worst, that was a white South African who bragged about beating confessions out of black people while he was a cop there"

      Geez, now that's a fucking asshole. Let's hope that's not *why* he got hired

      --
      Pain is merely failure leaving the body
    34. Re:I wouldn't work there. by pr0fessor · · Score: 1

      I was saying that from experience. Accidents and long term illness are not that uncommon and even if you think you've planed well that's not always how things work out. It's not that you shouldn't try to, at least that what I tell my kids... Don't blow all our money on things you don't need and save some for a rainy day, work smarter not harder, and don't pay someone else to do the things you can do yourself.

    35. Re:I wouldn't work there. by networkBoy · · Score: 1

      He came on board through an acquisition.
      Also to clarify:
      Beat confessions out of known innocent black people to save known guilty white suspects.

      Karma has had it's way with him from what I've heard.

      --
      whois gawk date unzip strip find touch finger mount join nice man top fsck grep eject more yes exit umount sleep dump
    36. Re:I wouldn't work there. by emt377 · · Score: 1

      Working for any big organization if you get in the wrong unit, with the wrong set of managers you job is hell. If you get in the right spot, your job may be great, until that manager moves to a different unit.

      Yeah, we find another job and then tender our resignation, we don't go leap off a 12 story building. Worst case we quit and then find another job; if we haven't saved up to do so we suck it up and jump through the hoops until we can leave. To go leap off a building because you didn't get a transfer is IMO a strong indicator of serious mental illness - which is likely why the person got put on an improvement program. The main problem isn't so much recognizing there's something wrong with this individual but rather there's no reasonable path from listening to someone crazy rant to getting a 5150 (or in this case WA's equivalent to the CA 5150).

    37. Re: I wouldn't work there. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      As a white South African, I try to avoid fellow white Saffers here in the US. Most of them are racist dicks, who bitch about the same things here that they did there.

    38. Re:I wouldn't work there. by psithurism · · Score: 1

      There is a lack of skilled workers willing to work at the offered level of pay

      Well, in amazon's case, it's more of a lack of skilled workers willing to tolerate our working conditions. Amazon pays amazingly well from what I've heard.

    39. Re:I wouldn't work there. by psithurism · · Score: 1

      Companies full of 80 hour/week people are waiting to implode.

      I'd agree with you, but somehow Amazon continues to succeed while allegedly driving their devs (and the rest of their staff) into working ridiculously hard all the time.

      I also witnessed a project recently that has been driving people nearly that hard for nearly 5 years. It's not going well, the (remaining) employees get by more on their bonds of shared suffering than 'passion', 'drive' or whatever euphemism companies are looking for these days, but it's still going!

      I know I can't survive more than a couple weeks at 60+ hours, but somehow, it's done; I've seen it done and it seems to be working for well Amazon.

    40. Re:I wouldn't work there. by HornWumpus · · Score: 1

      People make accommodations. They lie to cover each other, pad hours, sleep at meetings, always shit at work etc etc etc.

      Nobody is working productively for 80 hours/week. All the theater has it's costs.

      At 5 years in, they are all _useless_. I bet the business case shifted away from them years ago, but they were too focused on the next stupid task in front of them to realize. It will take a year or more to recover from that kind of deathmarch.

      The worst thing about 'being there', is that one really bad thing happening can make the whole thing spiral in. When you're already there 80 (actually working maybe 30), you can't dig deep and find another 10 in an emergency. Usually 80 also means you're constantly in fire fighter mode. Not a sign of planning.

      Which isn't to say that planned death marches never work. They just need to be of controlled length and scope. It is possible to go from one to the other in a business, you just need multiple teams and death march relays. But that leaves the second team sitting and waiting, death marches never end on schedule.

      Mostly I assess claims of 'constant 80s' as BS. It means they tell each other that. Sometimes by counting golf with coworkers as 'work'. They said 'work sucks' hence an 18 hole/9 drink/9 bowl business meeting.

      Of course some professions 'work 80', hotel management. But that 80 includes a ton of 'standing watch'.

      --
      John McAfee 'It was like that time I hired that Bangkok prostitute; to do my taxes, while I fucked my accountant'
    41. Re: I wouldn't work there. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I work in Seattle for a mediocre income, and live nearish Tacoma where you can afford a nice house, wife and kids on one income. Commute via rail for the fraction of the cost of running a car to work and back. People who complain about house prices in Seattle and sink two big incomes into living in the cool places, then whine about being broke :-)

    42. Re: I wouldn't work there. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      That is why you form good working relationships with the good managers and teams when opportunity knocks. When they move on, it'll likely work in your favor with them either inviting you to apply for jobs at their new place because they want to assemble a good team, or connecting you with people to network with should you need it.

       

    43. Re: I wouldn't work there. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      The manager of a tech company told me you get more out of people working four 8 to 9 hour days vs the five days 40 hours. People will screw around 8 hours out of a five day week because they get bored, and a 2 day weekend is not long enough to do much for your self after you get all your non work stuff done. 5 day work weeks with 2 days off is a drag, the occasional 4 on 3 off weeks I've had I get more done in those 4 days vs a typical 5 day work.

    44. Re:I wouldn't work there. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I was saying that from experience. Accidents and long term illness are not that uncommon and even if you think you've planed well that's not always how things work out. It's not that you shouldn't try to, at least that what I tell my kids... Don't blow all our money on things you don't need and save some for a rainy day, work smarter not harder, and don't pay someone else to do the things you can do yourself.

      I have almost 5k in out of pocket medical expenses so far this year (excludes vision and dental). I spend 270 a month on various doctor visits for my boys (excludes labs, prescriptions, etc). Formula is 60 a week, diapers is almost 100 a month. 300 dollar test to see if my son's liquids are going into his lungs (he's had pneumonia twice so far). 600 to renew wife's green card. 100 to renew her passport. Deaths (yes, plural) in the family meant travel out of town and hotel costs. Life happens and you can't prepare for every contingency.

    45. Re:I wouldn't work there. by RabidReindeer · · Score: 1

      I very much doubt that would happen to an extent where I couldn't do anything to adjust.

      The Greeks called statements like that "tempting Fate" or, if you prefer, hubris. Nothing makes you believe in spiteful Gods like saying "Nothing could possibly go wrong" and shortly thereafter having it humiliatingly thrown in your face.

      The one thing you can depend on in life is that the best laid plans o' Mice and Men gang aft agley.

    46. Re:I wouldn't work there. by SirMasterboy · · Score: 2

      So you think it's useless or futile to work hard and focus on putting oneself in a position to minimize the likelihood that they would have to take a job that they don't like because they need money now, especially if they find that working in a job they don't like makes them very unhappy.

      I was under the impression that most people don't do enough to put themselves in a good position like that and that they could have done more to prevent it and now they are complaining about being in that position when they didn't do everything they could to avoid it.

    47. Re:I wouldn't work there. by painandgreed · · Score: 1

      In pure rote roles it might work for a little longer, but in a couple of months the 80/week worker is a net negative producer.

      Willingness to work 80 hour weeks is a sign of someone who doesn't care about doing good work. Companies full of 80 hour/week people are waiting to implode.

      I live in Seattle and know people who have worked at Amazon. Some departments are better than others but the average term of employment told to me is about 18 months. By that time, they've found something better or been let go. Many of the people doing this know it and are just using Amazon for resume padding. They go in expecting to grind their nose, put it on their resume and hopefully use it as a stepping stone to find a better job because they have experience before they get let go. Amazon seems happy with that plan.

    48. Re:I wouldn't work there. by interstellarsurfer · · Score: 1

      It isn't considered suicide if you work yourself to death. So, by that metric, you may be right.

    49. Re: I wouldn't work there. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Meh. Indians are no different than us. Some are hard working putting their U.S.A. counterparts to shame. Some are lazy and ignorant. Just like us.

    50. Re:I wouldn't work there. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Exactly. I'm looking right now. I have several former co-workers who are now at Amazon and they're encouraging me to take a position there. I've got other colleagues, though, who worked there and don't have a very good opinion of the place. It's difficult to decide what's the best thing to do, but I can easily imagine taking a position because I have to in order to survive.

    51. Re: I wouldn't work there. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Can we get a statistic on this?

    52. Re:I wouldn't work there. by RabidReindeer · · Score: 1

      The operative word there is minimize.

      What people are finding so insufferable about you is that you think that the worst-case cannot happen to you and you're smug about it.

      Even people who have a safety cushion can lose it, and it's really, really hard to get it back if you do so. I know. I've had to rebuild my assets several times and I'll bet I keep a larger cushion than you do when I can. In large part because I do pass on a lot of job offers.

    53. Re:I wouldn't work there. by SirMasterboy · · Score: 1

      The operative word there is minimize.

      What people are finding so insufferable about you is that you think that the worst-case cannot happen to you and you're smug about it.

      Even people who have a safety cushion can lose it, and it's really, really hard to get it back if you do so. I know. I've had to rebuild my assets several times and I'll bet I keep a larger cushion than you do when I can. In large part because I do pass on a lot of job offers.

      Who's finding me insufferable? My comments are at 3 points.

      Also where do I claim that the worst case cannot happen to me? In fact I stated in an earlier comment that it's not about eliminating the chance, it's about doing things and making choices to minimize the chances.

      Not trying to be smug, trying to have a normal conversation about the topic.

      If you have to take the job then your cushion was not large enough. I don't know how big your cushion was compared to your expenses, but I live a pretty simple life. With my current cushion I could live for about 5 years without taking a job and that's including costs for individual medical insurance as well in order to protect against a worst case health scenario while I am not under an employer's insurance.

      I can afford the cost of health insurance, the maximum out of pocket expense per yer associated with that plan, food, and shelter all for about 5 years. What else is going to go so wrong to drain my funds that I will have to take a job right away? I'm just asking for enlightenment because apparently I am naive about this but nobody can seem to tell me specifics.

    54. Re:I wouldn't work there. by Apocryphos · · Score: 1

      Other people would rather sacrifice their work happiness than give up their home comforts. They are offended that you are happy with fewer home comforts because it reflects poorly on their character.

    55. Re:I wouldn't work there. by SirMasterboy · · Score: 1

      Yeah, I think it's great that people can make the choices of where to focus their money and efforts.

      I just have this thing where I feel like an alien in the way I fundamentally feel and operate. For instance I hate complaining and I very rarely complain about anything and I just can't understand why other people do it so much. I try to understand, but it's like those feelings are a foreign language to me. I find that sometimes like here I end up trying to understand other peoples view and why they act the way they act by indirectly having a conversation about it and asking questions to see how they respond. It's just my way of learning and gathering information I guess.

    56. Re: I wouldn't work there. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Been there. I just lost a loved one to suicide and he was incredibly hard working. I am repulsed by the cavalier tone on some of these posts

    57. Re: I wouldn't work there. by psycheitout · · Score: 1

      Wow it only took 4 comments for trolls to completely derail the conversation. Golf clap for them.

    58. Re: I wouldn't work there. by psycheitout · · Score: 1

      There's definitely some kind of underlying problems going on in his life. I've worked shitty jobs and I worked high pressure jobs and neither of them made me want to kill myself. Unless you count cirrhosis.

  2. What does he think this is, Apple?!?!?!?!? by CajunArson · · Score: 0

    Amazon needs to innovate suicide-prevention nets just like Tim Cook did.

    Come to think of it, suicided-prevention nets are about the only thing that Tim Cook can credibly claim he innovated...

    --
    AntiFA: An abbreviation for Anti First Amendment.
    1. Re: What does he think this is, Apple?!?!?!?!? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Crook innovates in penis vs butthole department.

    2. Re:What does he think this is, Apple?!?!?!?!? by The-Ixian · · Score: 3, Insightful

      Apparently the guy survived a 12 story drop... what makes you think that suicide nets aren't already implemented?

      --
      My eyes reflect the stars and a smile lights up my face.
    3. Re:What does he think this is, Apple?!?!?!?!? by MiniMike · · Score: 4, Funny

      It appears he fell in one of the Complaints Department letter storage silos, so he actually only fell like 10 feet.

    4. Re:What does he think this is, Apple?!?!?!?!? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Troll -1

    5. Re:What does he think this is, Apple?!?!?!?!? by Lord+Apathy · · Score: 1

      Sounds like they are. Usually 10 or more stories is enough to do it. Well once he gets out of the hospital he can try again from something higher. I would recommend a swan dive into a nice parking lot.

      --

      Supporting World Peace Through Nuclear Pacification

    6. Re:What does he think this is, Apple?!?!?!?!? by 0100010001010011 · · Score: 4, Informative

      If you compared the statistics of suicide for FoxConn vs China as a whole you actually had a reduced chance working for FoxConn.

      That doesn't help sell a narrative, but that's how statistics work.

    7. Re:What does he think this is, Apple?!?!?!?!? by Zontar_Thing_From_Ve · · Score: 1

      Apparently the guy survived a 12 story drop... what makes you think that suicide nets aren't already implemented?

      No mention of suicide nets. Plus, can you imagine the negative publicity Amazon would get from putting up suicide nets in the USA? It's a completely different story to do that in China as Apple did, but their factory had really weird rules for the employees and was not in any way a typical Chinese workplace. I don't know what the odds are for surviving a 12 story drop, but it's not impossible. The odds aren't good, but one unofficial source I found put a 15 story fall at a 1 in 100 chance of survival. There was a documented case where a flight attendant survived a fall of about 20,000 without a parachute from an airplane, although I don't know the details of that.

    8. Re:What does he think this is, Apple?!?!?!?!? by anegg · · Score: 4, Interesting

      I can't speak to what Tim Cook has or has not innovated in general, but suicide prevention nets were a "thing" in the 1981 Niven/Pournelle novel "Oath of Fealty" https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oath_of_Fealty_(novel). The story revolves around people dwelling in an arcology just outside of Los Angeles. Due to the size of the building, people were attracted to the roof to end their lives. The building designers included a diving board coupled with hidden nets to a) deter, and b) prevent the death of people attempting to commit suicide.

    9. Re:What does he think this is, Apple?!?!?!?!? by Coisiche · · Score: 1

      There was a documented case where a flight attendant survived a fall of about 20,000 without a parachute from an airplane, although I don't know the details of that.

      I hadn't heard of that one but I do know of am 18,000 feet fall survived over Germany during WWII. Turns out there are links to other similar instances on the wiki page.

    10. Re:What does he think this is, Apple?!?!?!?!? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      What Amazon really needs is a moat filled with actual water from the Amazon and swarm of piranhas to clean up the waters afterwards.

    11. Re: What does he think this is, Apple?!?!?!?!? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Nobody reads the articles anymore... he jumped from the 12th story, and landed on a balcony 20 feet below.

    12. Re:What does he think this is, Apple?!?!?!?!? by ClickOnThis · · Score: 1

      There was a documented case where a flight attendant survived a fall of about 20,000 without a parachute from an airplane, although I don't know the details of that.

      Her name was Vesna Vulovic. It happened in 1972, and it was 33,333 feet (10,160 m) not 20,000 feet.

      --
      If it weren't for deadlines, nothing would be late.
    13. Re:What does he think this is, Apple?!?!?!?!? by wonkey_monkey · · Score: 1

      It was 20,000 feet after the first 13,333 feet.

      --
      systemd is Roko's Basilisk.
    14. Re:What does he think this is, Apple?!?!?!?!? by TechyImmigrant · · Score: 1

      There was a documented case where a flight attendant survived a fall of about 20,000 without a parachute from an airplane, although I don't know the details of that.

      Her name was Vesna Vulovic. It happened in 1972, and it was 33,333 feet (10,160 m) not 20,000 feet.

      At least her velocity was not terminal.

      --
      I should use this sig to advertise my book ISBN-13 : 978-1501515132.
    15. Re:What does he think this is, Apple?!?!?!?!? by Kagato · · Score: 1

      I think you mean Foxconn.

    16. Re:What does he think this is, Apple?!?!?!?!? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 4, Informative

      He fell only 20 feet.
      http://www.seattlepi.com/local/article/Amazon-worker-leaps-from-building-at-Seattle-10640986.php

      h/t Wooky Monster https://slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=9934505&cid=53385601

    17. Re:What does he think this is, Apple?!?!?!?!? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Apparently the guy survived a 12 story drop... what makes you think that suicide nets aren't already implemented?

      Because TFS made no mention of them. Remember, a skydiver surviving a jump without a parachute is not impossible, merely improbable.

    18. Re:What does he think this is, Apple?!?!?!?!? by RabidReindeer · · Score: 2

      Usually you find that the survivor hit deep snow. Although IIRC, in one case a skydiver whose chute failed survived (with a lot of broken bones) by falling into a sewage pond.

      Even water isn't soft when you hit it at terminal velocity.

    19. Re:What does he think this is, Apple?!?!?!?!? by RabidReindeer · · Score: 4, Funny

      swarm of piranhas

      What kind? Sales or Legal?

    20. Re:What does he think this is, Apple?!?!?!?!? by HornWumpus · · Score: 1

      Now that Is a pathetic cry for help.

      --
      John McAfee 'It was like that time I hired that Bangkok prostitute; to do my taxes, while I fucked my accountant'
    21. Re:What does he think this is, Apple?!?!?!?!? by Not-a-Neg · · Score: 1

      The 20-something Russian Chess Grand Master just died a few days ago from a 12-story fall. Must be what stops the fall the matters the most.

      --
      -==- Buy a Mac and leave me alone!
    22. Re:What does he think this is, Apple?!?!?!?!? by Enigma2175 · · Score: 2

      I don't know what the odds are for surviving a 12 story drop, but it's not impossible.

      Doesn't matter in this case, because he didn't drop 12 stories. He jumped off a 4 story portion of a 12 story building, landing on an awning about 2 stories from the roof. He fell about 20 feet.

      --

      Enigma

    23. Re:What does he think this is, Apple?!?!?!?!? by LeftCoastThinker · · Score: 2

      It is not the fall that kills you. Once you hit terminal velocity, you don't go any faster. The sudden stop is what kills you. I remember several cases where people survived falls out of aircraft at cruising altitude. One fell into a 20' plus fresh powder snow drift (so they had 20' to decelerate) still injured, but non fatal. The other fell into a peat bog, where the peat was built up many feet after a dry season where most of the water was gone. The peat acted like a pillow, and the person survived.

      Around my building are several hedges that are at least 10' tall and quite dense. My guess is this guy fell onto something like that, combined with soft ground bark top cover that slowed him enough to make it non fatal. If you jump that far and land on parking lot, the stop happens over a fraction of an inch and you are 100% dead.

      --
      If you disagree, please post your argument. (-1, Overrated) isn't your personal censorship tool for views you don't like
    24. Re:What does he think this is, Apple?!?!?!?!? by amicusNYCL · · Score: 5, Funny

      The rooftop was about four stories up -- the pedestal section of the 12-story high-rise -- but the man fell only about 20 feet to a balcony below, Lt. Harold Webb, with Seattle Fire, said.

      And that's a perfect example of the lack of motivation which management was concerned about with this employee. This isn't going to look good on his next performance review.

      --
      "Our two-party system is like a bowl of shit looking at itself in a mirror." - Lewis Black
    25. Re:What does he think this is, Apple?!?!?!?!? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      The most vicious kind: Serrasalmidae Homo Resurgere

    26. Re:What does he think this is, Apple?!?!?!?!? by haruchai · · Score: 1

      "Come to think of it, suicided-prevention nets are about the only thing that Tim Cook can credibly claim he innovated..."

      But everyone buys them from Amazon

      --
      Pain is merely failure leaving the body
    27. Re:What does he think this is, Apple?!?!?!?!? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Did anyone notice the sign on the window, partially occluded by the firetruck (in the photo, above)?

    28. Re:What does he think this is, Apple?!?!?!?!? by Rande · · Score: 1

      I remember that one mostly for the phrase 'think of it as evolution in action'.

  3. Packages! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    >Amazon Worker Jumps Off Company Building After Email Note

    Was the note telling him he would have to pick up his package from the post office?

  4. Unlike Foxconn by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    This is clearly a deranged individual, and not a reflection on modern corporate management styles. USA! USA! USA!

    1. Re:Unlike Foxconn by GLMDesigns · · Score: 1

      Clearly suicides in Cuba are not a reflection on modern socialist management styles. Che! Che! Che!

      --
      If you're scared of your govt then you need to further restrict its powers
      Vote 3rd Party in 2016 and beyond
    2. Re:Unlike Foxconn by __aaclcg7560 · · Score: 1

      A rational person would have dropped a PC from the 12-story building to hit his boss, eliminating the source of his troubles.

    3. Re:Unlike Foxconn by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Gravitational potential energy?

    4. Re:Unlike Foxconn by MitchDev · · Score: 1

      Remember kids, land head first if jumping, or cut along the wrist, not across....

    5. Re: Unlike Foxconn by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Exactly. How dare employees defy management.
      This is capitalism, lives are overrated and don't matter in global exchange where the next in line will die harder, unless it is a stupid migrant in which case we'll throw politically correct bonuses at them.
      Kill everyone (except stupid migrants), profit is the only attribute that matters. Humans die. To hell with our culture and society.

    6. Re:Unlike Foxconn by wyHunter · · Score: 0

      Note that suicide rates have increased yearly in the US since Obama took office. Connection? Perhaps.

    7. Re:Unlike Foxconn by GLMDesigns · · Score: 2

      Maybe loss of manufacturing jobs and horrible jobless economy?

      --
      If you're scared of your govt then you need to further restrict its powers
      Vote 3rd Party in 2016 and beyond
    8. Re:Unlike Foxconn by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      "Note that suicide rates have increased yearly in the US since..." BushCo destroyed the economy, and it took years for Obama to undo just some of the damage that Republicans threw in his lap. Connection? Perhaps.
      But that's OK, the Economy is robust again, (Dow at 19K!), just in time for TrumpCo to destroy it again.
      Thus as it always is.

    9. Re:Unlike Foxconn by wyHunter · · Score: 1

      This wouldn't surprise me. But wait, being an uber driver is an absolutely wonderful thing, especially if your'e driving a bicycle rickshaw. It's non polluting you know.

    10. Re:Unlike Foxconn by JaredOfEuropa · · Score: 1

      Across for attention, along for results.

      --
      If construction was anything like programming, an incorrectly fitted lock would bring down the entire building...
    11. Re:Unlike Foxconn by micahraleigh · · Score: 1

      Blaming the economy on Bush 8 years after he left office. The fact that growth has never exceeded 2% during Obama's tenure should tell you all you need to know about that. "Stopping damage" is not an accomplishment. It should be growing.

      The stocks are a LEADING indicator, and 19K happened after the election. Before that my broker told me not to even bother putting money into stocks before the election. Think about how crazy that is ... a guy who makes money for a living investing my money told me to send it somewhere else outside his portfolios. That's what the stock outlook was.

    12. Re:Unlike Foxconn by Pig+Hogger · · Score: 1

      And gives you terrific legs, too!

    13. Re:Unlike Foxconn by Coren22 · · Score: 1

      Surely you mean Bill Clinton and not Bush, as he was the one that signed the banking deregulation into law, and since that is what caused the crash, it should be attributed to his term (more to congress than the pres though, just like anything else).

      https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/...

      --
      APK likes to ask for responses to the same things over and over. Maybe he just likes the responses?
  5. Umm what?! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Ok I get the depression that comes with having a shitty job. I really do, BUT killing ones self is not the solution. Finding another job is. At another company. Away from the shit. But sounds like Amazon does some shady shit to avoid paying unemployment based on the key point. "employee improvement program" used as a precursor to being fired. Some shady shit going on there.

    1. Re:Umm what?! by pezpunk · · Score: 0

      wow it's almost like depression or other types of mental illness can make people do things that aren't rational.

      fucking dipshit.

      --
      i could live a little longer in this prison
    2. Re:Umm what?! by nolife · · Score: 1

      Most larger companies have some type of a multi-step "employee improvement program". It is to put established consistent set of steps in place to document and attempt to improve the performance of someone to help them later if an unlawful termination/discrimination case comes up.

      If you just fire someone because they sucked and were late, the argument is Jill and Jim were also late a few times and they sucked too but they were not fired.

      I thought people just jumped off some bridge in Seattle?

         

      --
      Bad boys rape our young girls but Violet gives willingly.
    3. Re:Umm what?! by Zak3056 · · Score: 4, Insightful

      wow it's almost like depression or other types of mental illness can make people do things that aren't rational.

      fucking dipshit.

      Mental health issues are not the easiest thing to wrap your head around (especially if you're of a generation that was taught to rub dirt on it/walk it off in response to any injury, physical, mental, or emotional). If you haven't lived through it, or had a family member/close friend live through it, it's likely you just can't comprehend what some stranger is going through.

      Just because someone is ignorant doesn't make them a dipshit (unless they're willfully so). Indeed, the AC was expressing empathy in general for the guy who tried to kill himself, rather than the disdain that you appear to be trying to respond to.

      --
      What part of "shall not be infringed" is so hard to understand?
    4. Re:Umm what?! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 4, Informative

      EIP or IIP (Individual Improvement Plans) are a staple of the U.S.'s highly litigious society. If you are a bad performer and I want to fire you I can't just do it. I have to be able to prove you are a bad employee. That means I have to document why you are bad and give you a chance to prove to me that you can be a better employee.
      So say you are habitually late. I have to prove that you're late (No time clocks, don't you know, but RFID ID badges can usually be used to document a worker's habitual tardiness.) Then I have to have a meeting with you, with a witness from HR, where I clearly tell you that being habitually tardy is against company policy and can result in your termination. You typically sign a form saying that I've told you that being tardy is against company policy and that it can lead to your termination. You also promise to be on time in writing. That is your 'improvement.' Typically there is some duration of time the IIP is in effect, so that if you're late once three years after our talk I can't fire you. Usually its a period like three or six months. If you complete the IIP period successfully the IIP may be destroyed, retain for some specific period or go in your permanent work record, depending upon company policy.
      In many states if you are fired for cause (that is because you are habitually late, like in our example) then the employer is not required to pay for you under their unemployment insurance program, just like they don't have to pay if you quit. As a matter of fact in most states all firings are for cause. Terminating you because of other reasons is call being "laid off" and almost always makes you eligible for unemployment payments.

    5. Re:Umm what?! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Insightful

      This.

      As someone who's never suffered from depression I have a hard time wrapping my head around stories like this, hell at that point robbing a bank starts to sound like a better idea.. but I can at least appreciate that it's (usually) not something that can be fixed purely with logic. Saying "he should just get a better job" is like telling someone suffering from severe depression to just cheer up or someone with anxiety to relax.. just doesn't work that way.

    6. Re:Umm what?! by Destoo · · Score: 1

      >Most larger companies have some type of a multi-step "employee improvement program".

      I thought you were going to write multi-step buildings.
      So.. .. they wouldn't fall that high .. if they jumped.

      --
      Nouvelles de jeux et technologies en français. TC
    7. Re:Umm what?! by hattig · · Score: 1

      Yup, improvement programmes usually exist to document the failure of the employee to meet the demands of the programme, which are set to levels that can't be achieved day-in, day-out over the programme period. Obviously if there is an external issue creating the employee's problems, the programme simply adds stress to the situation they are in rather than even being anything like being a helpful assistance through a temporary situation.

      It's usually only when that employee eventually leaves and finds another job that they realise the expectations of productivity from the previous role/programme were not attainable.

      At the root there is always a bad manager.

    8. Re: Umm what?! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      After he got the bad job review, did he try to walk it off? No, instead he jumped 20 feet in an effort to get some attention. Fucking snowflakes.

    9. Re:Umm what?! by kmbss · · Score: 1

      There is NO exuse for weakness. Toughen the fuck up. Waaaaaa I'm unhappy Waaaaaaa. We didn't rub dirt in it. We are strong men and women. New generation is weak whiny babies.

      --
      I can't remember the last time I forgot anything........ ever.
  6. employee improvement plan by mwvdlee · · Score: 4, Informative

    employee improvement plan, a step that can lead to termination if performance isn't improved

    Whoever invented "employee improvement plan" needs to die.

    --
    Slashdot social media options: AIM, ICQ, Yahoo, Jabber and Mobile Text. Why no MySpace?
    1. Re:employee improvement plan by Big+Hairy+Ian · · Score: 1

      Whoever invented "employee improvement plan" needs to die.

      It will have been someone in Human Remains

      --

      Build a Man a Fire, and He'll Be Warm for a Day. Set a Man on Fire, and He'll Be Warm for the Rest of His Life.

    2. Re:employee improvement plan by The-Ixian · · Score: 3

      Your recent post on the Internet has flagged you for the employee improvement plan...

      --
      My eyes reflect the stars and a smile lights up my face.
    3. Re:employee improvement plan by Archtech · · Score: 3, Informative

      I believe it is one of the first steps in the universally-recognized process of "managing someone out". This can be required if an employee shows signs of initiative, curiosity, creativity, or resentment at horrible working conditions and excessive demands on her time.

      --
      I am sure that there are many other solipsists out there.
    4. Re:employee improvement plan by Paul+Carver · · Score: 4, Insightful

      employee improvement plan, a step that can lead to termination if performance isn't improved

      Whoever invented "employee improvement plan" needs to die.

      Sure, wouldn't want to actually let the employee know why they're getting bad performance reviews, just fire them.

      That was sarcasm, by the way. I know nothing about Amazon's employee improvement plan, but the general idea of giving extra assistance to employees who aren't performing as well as their peers is absolutely a good idea.

      It's utterly naive to think that everyone can be in the top X% or that all employees will perform so equally that better or worse can't be distinguished. As long as some employees perform worse you only have three choices:

      1) Do nothing. Just keep paying them for doing worse than their peers
      2) Fire them. Hire somebody else that you hope will perform better.
      3) Help them to identify why they perform worse than their peers and try to help them improve

      I can't see any reason why option 3 is worse than option 1 or 2.

      Unless you dispute my assumption that there exist some employees who perform worse than others, it absolutely makes sense for companies to have a goal and plan for improving their lowest performing employees rather than firing them or ignoring them.

      Obviously if someone is utterly hopeless then you have to just get rid of them to prevent them from contributing negative value (i.e. creating problems for their peers to fix to the net loss of the company's productivity) but if they're just "ok but not great" then actively working to improve them benefits everyone. Maybe Amazon's plan is broken, I wouldn't know, but the general concept is a good one.

    5. Re:employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      A "performance improvement plan" is fairly common in the public sector. It is often done as a way to either get a bunch of documentation so someone can be fired, or maybe a last chance for a marginal employee.

      However, when I see it mentioned, it is the kiss of death. It means to get that resume updated, start using any PTO left over to interview, and get going. It is usually something done by a company to let someone know they are going to be booted sooner or later.

    6. Re: employee improvement plan by barc0001 · · Score: 5, Interesting

      The problem is that there are many cases where companies use the employee improvement plan process to fire people who aren't actually bad at their jobs but the companies want them to leave for other reasons and don't want to lay them off with the associated unemployment costs.

      They put the target on said plan in hopes they take the hint and just leave. If not, the employee will be judged to have not sufficiently improved, no matter how they actually perform, and at the end of the EIP deadline they are let go for cause.

    7. Re:employee improvement plan by MasseKid · · Score: 1

      Why? Why is simply firing someone a better solution than giving them exactly what they are doing wrong and what they need to change if they want to keep their job?

    8. Re: employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Labelling "lowest performing" and "utterly hopeless" is supposed to motivate?

      Creativity and ingenuity - the factors that make us human, can't be bargained with on those terms.

      You want slaves that do mechanical work - I suggest changing constitution to reflect that.

    9. Re:employee improvement plan by swb · · Score: 1

      It's utterly naive to think that everyone can be in the top X% or that all employees will perform so equally that better or worse can't be distinguished

      Isn't that how 6-Sigma at GE supposedly worked? They routinely expected to sack anyone whose metrics were below some arbitrary number? Keep jacking the number they have to hit up and when they stop making it, you jettison them like an empty rocket stage.

    10. Re:employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Agreed. "Employee Improvement Plan" is what they do when they can't fire you outright for some reason, and don't want to spend the money on bribing you to quit with a severance payment. The idea is to make you feel resentful enough that you quit by yourself. "It's only a matter of time."

      I feel sorry for the poor guy who tried to commit suicide -- he's obviously still in the early years of his career where he thinks that passion and dedication is something that will be rewarded.

    11. Re:employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Who cares if they perform worse than their peers? If they do the job you're paying them for, you keep paying them. Maybe pay them less than other employees if other employees are doing more than what you initially expected of them, but what does it matter if somebody isn't doing as well as their peers?

      By all means, if someone isn't living up to the expectations around doing the job, then by all means, put them on a performance improvement plan or fire them. Comparisons to colleagues should not factor into anything with the exception of distributing raises, promotions and layoffs.

    12. Re:employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      This comment has been flagged for the FBI for threat of violence. Enjoy your interview mwvdlee.

    13. Re:employee improvement plan by DrXym · · Score: 1

      That was sarcasm, by the way. I know nothing about Amazon's employee improvement plan, but the general idea of giving extra assistance to employees who aren't performing as well as their peers is absolutely a good idea.

      That depends one what "improve" actually means in Amazon compared to other workplaces. Amazon is well known for micromanaging its workers and treating certain employees (e.g. those in warehouses) extremely badly. It's not hard to see how they could abuse employees - making them work beyond what is reasonable, or pushing them out the door - under the guise of an "improvement plan".

    14. Re:employee improvement plan by Ihlosi · · Score: 1
      Why? Why is simply firing someone a better solution than giving them exactly what they are doing wrong and what they need to change if they want to keep their job?

      Simple: The person about to be fired has already demonstrated that they failed to perform their duties. If you hire a new person, you get the change of hiring someone who can do things right the first time. If not, you're not worse off than before.

    15. Re: employee improvement plan by fahrbot-bot · · Score: 1

      If not, the employee will be judged to have not sufficiently improved, no matter how they actually perform, and at the end of the EIP deadline they are let go for cause.

      One of the companies I worked for tried that with me here in Virginia when a new manager came in and replaced people. The unemployment application form had the following question: "Were you performing your duties to the best of your abilities?" I checked "Yes" (which was true). Got my unemployment benefits.

      --
      It must have been something you assimilated. . . .
    16. Re:employee improvement plan by swillden · · Score: 1

      employee improvement plan, a step that can lead to termination if performance isn't improved

      Whoever invented "employee improvement plan" needs to die.

      Nonsense. Improvement plans are a good thing. I'm sure it's unpleasant to be put on one, but much better than getting fired straight off.

      I've never been put on a plan, but I know many who have, and I have been fired. I'd much rather be put on a plan. Getting fired is really stressful. It leaves you job hunting on a tight, financially-driven timeline and with some serious disadvantages. In contrast, if you're on a 3-6 month improvement plan, that means worst case you have 3-6 months to look for a job, and all of your prospective employers will see you as a gainfully-employed person who is simply looking for a better situation, rather than a potential problem who couldn't hold his last job. If you don't find a new job during your improvement plan period, you're exactly where you would have been without the improvement plan... except that you've had some time to prepare.

      There is a slim possibility that you can actually fix whatever it is that you're not doing well and stay on, assuming you want that. If you're put on a plan it's probably a really good idea to try to feel your manager out on whether that's even a possibility, because in many cases it's not. The improvement plan is just part of the firing process in many companies. Not that you can't stay if you make a dramatic turnaround, but the assumption is that you're on your way out, so it had better be really dramatic. Try to get your manager alone and ask them completely "off-the-record-we'll-both-deny-this-conversation-ever-happened" what your chances of staying are. If you can find that out you can determine whether you should invest time and effort in trying to do a better job, or begin spending large chunks of your time looking for another job -- and maybe start trying to cut expenses and sock more money away in case you end up unemployed for a while (though you should always keep a few month's salary in savings). If you don't get a really strong and sincere response that your manager wants to keep you if you'll just start doing X, Y and Z, assume the worst and get to work on your resume.

      --
      Note to ACs: I usually delete AC replies without reading them. If you want to talk to me, log in.
    17. Re:employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      3) Help them to identify why they perform worse than their peers and try to help them improve

      That's an easy one: somebody in HR wrote the job description.

    18. Re:employee improvement plan by anegg · · Score: 2

      Process improvement methods like 6 Sigma https://www.isixsigma.com/new-to-six-sigma/getting-started/what-six-sigma/ are not intended to drive individual people to perform in the top x%, they are intended to identify and eliminate defects in processes. That said, methods like that can be misunderstood and/or misused by management, especially when said management thinks the method is a tool that you just bring in and swing around in order to reap the benefits of "improved processes," more productivity, etc.

    19. Re:employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      The first rule about the employee improvement plan is don't talk about the employee improvement plan.

    20. Re:employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Electronic Arts put me on a "performance improvement plan" as a direct response to my complaints about the impossible hours (this was back in the "EA spouse" era). My direct supervisor, who thought highly of my work, was forced to make up a list of 10 things I had to improve. Yeah, fuck that - I gave my notice. And of course the people who had me put on the "PIP" ended up groveling to try to get me to stay. What a shit company.

      To be fair, they may have improved in the last decade - I honestly don't know because everyone I knew who worked there ended up leaving within a year or two of me.

    21. Re:employee improvement plan by Jfetjunky · · Score: 1

      While it sounds like corporate mumbo-jumbo, it serves two important purposes. 1: It puts the employee on notice. I have seen this, but luckily never been on the receiving end. The most recent one, the employee was offered to be placed on the plan or take a severance and leave. The only catch was that if they chose the plan and failed, it would have been a boot. No severance, no nothing. Truthfully, your review should not go from good to "you're an inch from fired" without you having heard something in between. That's bad management. If you are sliding, your manager should give you feedback right then and there, not surprise you with it in a review. 2: It gives HR a fallback to prove they took reasonable measures before firing the employee. Hard to argue a wrongful termination after that unless there's some obvious discriminatory behavior or something.

    22. Re:employee improvement plan by boskone · · Score: 1

      If someone gets put on a plan, their best advice is to do three things

      1. financially/family prepare as if you're going to lose your job. Cut spending, pump up savings, etc.
      2. job hunt like a mofo, in case the PiP doesn't work
      3. (and this is important) - throw yourself into the PiP and do everything you can to lean in and improve. Even if you think it's worthless, unfair, even if you are sure you'll have another job in a week. Lean in and do your damndest to improve. this gives you the chance that you'll keep your existing job longer (perhaps indefinitely) and will give you massively better references in the future (two jobs from now)

      3 is the hardest step, but really important

    23. Re:employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Where I've worked, a "Performance improvement plan" is also a tool used by an entrenched micromanaging culture. You can perform better than anyone else and still get put on one if you don't drink the right kool-ade or kiss the right @$$ in the right way. It won't get you fired, but it can keep employees out of the way of promotions for other under-performing but favored employees. Might be exactly what's going on at Amazon.

    24. Re: employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      > employee improvement plan, a step that can lead to termination if performance isn't improved

      I thought they *always* led to termination...

    25. Re:employee improvement plan by Coisiche · · Score: 1

      As frequently said... the beatings will continue until morale improves.

    26. Re:employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Step 3 precludes step 2.

    27. Re:employee improvement plan by JustAnotherOldGuy · · Score: 1

      Isn't that how 6-Sigma at GE supposedly worked? They routinely expected to sack anyone whose metrics were below some arbitrary number? Keep jacking the number they have to hit up and when they stop making it, you jettison them like an empty rocket stage.

      You're thinking of "Stack Ranking", used by Microsoft to foster hatred and backstabbing between their employees. And boy did it work.

      --
      Just cruising through this digital world at 33 1/3 rpm...
    28. Re: employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Yeah, unemployment benefits will be denied if you were terminated for misconduct; even if you are bad at your job that's not grounds to deny them.

    29. Re:employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      There are companies that routinely fire the bottom X% of their workforce, with the belief that they will have better workers overall. I'm not sure if Amazon is one of these places, but "employee improvement plan" sounds like a first step towards that goal.

      This employee probably saw the writing on the wall - struggling to meet whatever goals his manager had. Maybe the manager had it out for him. Maybe he knew he wasn't skilled enough. He wanted to go to a department he thought he would be more comfortable. Instead, Amazon initiated the first step towards termination.

    30. Re:employee improvement plan by segedunum · · Score: 0

      'Human Resources' is fucking evil. It's a pointless paper shuffling department that for some reason has increasingly got its fingers stuck into a lot of pies. If you want to improve a company, seriously, fire HR. At best it is a department that should ensure people get paid, and that's it.

    31. Re:employee improvement plan by HornWumpus · · Score: 1

      It's worse than that.

      Basic group psych, Most people will lower their work standard/output to match the lowest performing co-worker that 'gets away with it'.

      Internally motivated individuals are uncommon, even they mostly 'get over it' after some period of watching co-workers continue to 'get away with it', especially if the co-workers getting by are actually ranked/rewarded better.

      There is nothing that can wreck a team faster than some mouth breathing ass kisser getting a big promotion, raise and bonus. Especially if everybody sees the resulting trainwreck coming.

      The sad fact is that you can't allow even one 'bad one' in the core of a good team. Really good teams actually protect themselves.

      I'm sure this has nothing to do with Amazon though. That place is an obvious political hornet's nest, staffed with people working just hard enough not to get fired, while politicking their asses off.

      --
      John McAfee 'It was like that time I hired that Bangkok prostitute; to do my taxes, while I fucked my accountant'
    32. Re:employee improvement plan by segedunum · · Score: 1

      You're thinking of "Stack Ranking", used by Microsoft to foster hatred and backstabbing between their employees. And boy did it work.

      Indeed. This kind of shit is also used by incompetent and utterly useless managers to keep themselves in jobs and get promoted. The good people are otherwise to pre-occupied. It's all fire and motion, as ironically Joel Spolsky once said.

    33. Re:employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      It is a pretty common concept at large companies. We have a PIP - Performance Improvement Plan - that people who get rated a "3" (the scale has 1, 2+, 2, 2-, and 3 where 3 means they are not meeting expectations) are automatically put on a PIP and expected to improve or eventually be fired. Unfortunately we now have a forced ranking where some people HAVE to be a 3 even if you have a very high performing team. This can be awful for moral and has been documented as something that is the death of an IT company - so of course we implemented the forced ranking this year so we can die.

    34. Re:employee improvement plan by segedunum · · Score: 1

      Sure, wouldn't want to actually let the employee know why they're getting bad performance reviews, just fire them.

      That was sarcasm, by the way. I know nothing about Amazon's employee improvement plan, but the general idea of giving extra assistance to employees who aren't performing as well as their peers is absolutely a good idea.

      It's utterly naive to think that everyone can be in the top X% or that all employees will perform so equally that better or worse can't be distinguished.

      Errrrr, that's their line manager's call, or at least it should be.

    35. Re: employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Washington is an "at will" state, meaning they employer can fire at will and employee can quit at will.

    36. Re: employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I had to recently put one of my engineers on a Performance Plan, he is very liked and the intention of being able to help him save his job since his performance had been terrible.

    37. Re:employee improvement plan by HornWumpus · · Score: 1

      If worked with a few people that could be fairly called: 'defects in process'.

      What do you call a 'programmer' that comes to you with a piece of dynamic SQL that fails, utterly lost. The string contains concatenation operators from the language building the SQL? He has, again, forgotten that there is such a thing as a SQL console, good for seeing meaningful errors and query plans. (Of course, Brahmin. Yes I am a Casteist, never hire Brahmin.)

      --
      John McAfee 'It was like that time I hired that Bangkok prostitute; to do my taxes, while I fucked my accountant'
    38. Re:employee improvement plan by segedunum · · Score: 1

      Throwing yourself into 3 is usually a waste of time, especially if you know you're doing all you can and are having to meet arbitrary targets cooked up by some moron. They've identified the people they want to get rid of and an improvement plan gives them an excuse to do it - and they can get a few months of exceptionally hard work out of you before they do it ;-).

    39. Re:employee improvement plan by HornWumpus · · Score: 1

      If they are just stupid and are busting ass to produce 'good enough', then fine.

      But you can't let people work 'just hard enough not to get fired' and be a place where anybody in their right mind would want to work.

      The hard fact is that bigger core teams lose efficiency. You can only tolerate slack jaws in peripheral roles or the team size balloons and you fall into the communications overhead trap.

      --
      John McAfee 'It was like that time I hired that Bangkok prostitute; to do my taxes, while I fucked my accountant'
    40. Re: employee improvement plan by barc0001 · · Score: 1

      Sure, I didn't say ALL instances of EIP action were nefarious, just a not-insignificant percentage.

    41. Re: employee improvement plan by keltor · · Score: 1

      I'm not saying that there aren't some large companies that somehow do that, but the various large companies I've worked at EIPs are not used to fire someone, nor used to avoid unemployment costs, actually every single place I've been was the same, first follow the state laws for severance, second, offer them additional severance to agree not to claim unemployment, third if they don't take that, fine they file, we don't fight the unemployment. Bigger companies are MUCH more worried about being sued, because the cost of an employment law lawsuit is high, like 50% of a person's income easily. In fact when people DO lawyer up because they're a minority, we generally would settle starting at 3 mos income. Big companies do not actually care about paying unemployment UNLESS they are firing lots of people, then they worry about it.

    42. Re:employee improvement plan by SecurityGuy · · Score: 1

      Well, that would probably be people who didn't like being fired capriciously. Personally, I'd rather my company tell me exactly why they weren't happy with me and what I could do to rectify it.

    43. Re:employee improvement plan by HornWumpus · · Score: 1

      You're not disagreeing with GP.

      Why would you stay around?

      --
      John McAfee 'It was like that time I hired that Bangkok prostitute; to do my taxes, while I fucked my accountant'
    44. Re:employee improvement plan by SScorpio · · Score: 2

      At best it is a department that should ensure people get paid, and that's it.

      I thought that was accounting? HR typically handles employee benefits and is involved in the hiring and firing process as that affects who is receiving the benefits.

    45. Re:employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Or, perhaps the entire concept of whoever is last in line gets shot in the head is inhuman. The idea that the lowest performer in any given team needs to change or get fired is evil, frankly. In any given team, there is always a lowest performer. There was a lowest performer in the Manhattan project team. There was a lowest performer in Alan Turing's team at Bletchley Park. There was a lowest performer aboard the Apollo 11 spacecraft. Why does that make it automatically justified to constantly fire and replace whoever that person is? Perhaps being in last place among a team of luminaries is still valuable. Perhaps that last place person is still far ahead of the curve, and the distraction of forcing the entire team to do the politicking and backstabbing to make sure they don't wind up at the end of the list would hurt the ability of the team to perform its function.

      Amazon will one day, very soon, learn that it doesn't necessarily give you the best result when the bottom edge of a tapestry you're weaving is on fire.

    46. Re:employee improvement plan by HornWumpus · · Score: 1

      If the place is hell to you and you're just not a fit, don't 'lean in', waste of time. Their definition of 'improve' is likely questionable at best.

      The thing you do want to do is respect your coworkers right to the end, fuck the PHB. Former coworkers are the network that makes your life. They also have realistic understanding of who actually gets things done. They aren't PHBs with useless, easy to game metrics.

      The last reason to respect your coworkers, is so you can subsequently run an employee raid on the hellhole. Every hellhole has a few 'heroes' that do 99% of the actual work. When you get your next job, be sure and thank the last place by hiring away their only real workers. Be careful, don't come right out and say anything in email. Learn the 'Clinton' lesson, meet up with former trusted colleagues for pool and make plans IRL.

      Of course if you are an actual idiot, none of the above applies.

      --
      John McAfee 'It was like that time I hired that Bangkok prostitute; to do my taxes, while I fucked my accountant'
    47. Re:employee improvement plan by JustAnotherOldGuy · · Score: 1

      It's all fire and motion, as ironically Joel Spolsky once said.

      I think of it as "stumble and fumble".

      --
      Just cruising through this digital world at 33 1/3 rpm...
    48. Re:employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      That along with not allowing vacation time and requiring work on weekends. When I worked at Microsoft, my team was downsizing over a period of several years, so we weren't allowed any vacation time and were required to come into work every Saturday even though there was nothing to do. They were trying to get us to quit. With the severance pay I got, I was never going to quit no matter what. I worked nearly every Saturday for more than two years. The money was nice, but I now regret doing that since I only saw my twin nieces twice in their first two and half years after they were born. I missed so much.

    49. Re:employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      No. That is just wrong.

      It takes a high and a low to make an average. There will always be people outperforming others. There should be a defined minimal acceptable level. Those performing below it can be warned then fired. Those exceeding it are the ones working to get ahead.

    50. Re:employee improvement plan by SScorpio · · Score: 2

      Because bringing on someone new and training them has no cost associated with it.

      Maybe the issue is something going on in the employee's life, and working with them and getting consoling resolves the performance problems.

      Or maybe the issue is something else internal that working through the improvement plan reveals.

      Bottom line, finding, hiring, and on-boarding someone is a long and expensive process. Retaining the talent you have is normally better for the bottom line and moral.

    51. Re:employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I worked at Amazon, I never knew of a single person who was put on an employee improvement plan that wasn't fired at the end of the plan.

    52. Re:employee improvement plan by networkBoy · · Score: 1

      Yup.
      Doesn't matter how good you are at your job...
      Piss off the wrong manager and you're done for (BDDT after 17 flawless years).

      --
      whois gawk date unzip strip find touch finger mount join nice man top fsck grep eject more yes exit umount sleep dump
    53. Re:employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      2) Fire them. Hire somebody else that you hope will perform better.

      This is what Amazon's stack ranking does.

      Other companies that use HR policies like forced raking have similar creeping problems. Companies like Google and Yahoo use it even though it is a toxic idea from Microsoft. It's an HR policy so bad that Microsoft got rid of it after losing nearly a decade worth of productivity.

      If you've never experienced it, the best description is somewhere between 'Hunger Games for IT' and 'Crony Capitalism applied to employee retention.' But it is a fabulous way to justify paying huge bonuses to the "top" 1% while firing people you don't like.

    54. Re:employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      2. job hunt like a mofo, in case the PiP doesn't work

      The PIP never works. I've worked for Amazon among other companies, and the PIP is always purely for show. It's a legal tactic. If you ever try to sue the company over your firing all they have to do is show that they put you on PIP, and tried the "help you improve". The objectives of the PIP are written so that you cannot meet them. If by any chance you do, they'll say you didn't.

      But your first 2 points are spot on. If you're put on a PIP, get your affairs in order. Make sure you have cash in the bank, start your job search immediately, figure out your options for health insurance and so on. As far as HR is concerned you're already out the door.

    55. Re:employee improvement plan by phantomfive · · Score: 1

      Amazon uses stack ranking, too. Rumors are they will change it soon, but hasn't changed yet.

      --
      "First they came for the slanderers and i said nothing."
    56. Re:employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Exactly, you stress yourself out improving and meeting the current target then the target is increased and you are back to square one.

    57. Re: employee improvement plan by JeffOwl · · Score: 2

      Technically true, however if they don't think there is any way you can't do the job, they still do the PIP for a reason. They want to avoid lawsuits. The former employee can sue for wrongful termination, even in Washington state.

      terminations in violation of the implied covenant of good faith and fair dealing. Wrongful termination also includes terminations in violation of federal, state, or local anti-discrimination laws.

    58. Re: employee improvement plan by lgw · · Score: 1

      I've never seen, or even heard of, someone who was put on an "improvement plan" and still worked at the company afterwards. It should just be called an "employee termination plan" for honesty (at most companies it's a lot more paperwork than just giving someone a bad review, so there's no reason for a manager to go that route except as part of the termination process).

      That said, it's a nice way to give a failing employee a chance to job hunt while still employed, so I can't say it's a bad thing.

      --
      Socialism: a lie told by totalitarians and believed by fools.
    59. Re:employee improvement plan by lgw · · Score: 1

      From the rumors I've heard, they've at least dropped the "firing quota" part of stack ranking, but the whole system is simply evil and counterproductive.

      --
      Socialism: a lie told by totalitarians and believed by fools.
    60. Re:employee improvement plan by lgw · · Score: 1

      But you can't let people work 'just hard enough not to get fired' and be a place where anybody in their right mind would want to work.

      Of course you can. Probably half the people at any job are working just hard enough not to get fired. Everyone between the strong performers and the people who actually get fired is working just hard enough not to get fired.

      Or are you trying to say that an incompetent guy working hard is better than a skilled guy phoning it in? Nothing could be more untrue in software development - the only thing worse than someone incompetent is someone incompetent who writes a lot of code.

      --
      Socialism: a lie told by totalitarians and believed by fools.
    61. Re:employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      As someone that managed a Help Desk, EIP is used for System Administrators that fail to handle their workload even remotely close to the same level as their colleagues. Our particular SLA was respond within 48 hours and close with 5 business days after responding. Simple enough. We only ever had to let one person go that was barely completing 10 tickets in the time that other admins would complete 50. No difference in the difficulty of the tickets or the difficulty of the individuals being supported. After that person was let go, the company paid for me to transfer to the office they had been covering and I handled their job plus my own with ease. It was only a 30-person office compared to the 600 person campus I had been at. The primary complaint of the person let go was they didn't like being managed remotely. The main reason I agreed to the transfer was so that I could enjoy not having the IT Director breathing down my own neck, I LOVED being managed remotely.

      Too bad they got bought out by a large corporation that outsourced everything to India. On the upside I made some good money charging double my previous salary for call-backs as a contractor. The site manager got fed up with the horrible service under the outsourced provider.

    62. Re: employee improvement plan by Paul+Carver · · Score: 3, Insightful

      I'll see your anecdote and raise you one. I know someone who was put on an improvement plan (likely due to personality conflict with their manager, quite possibly the manager's fault) and continued on with the company until eventual retirement age and left at well over 70 years of age with full pension and retirement benefits.

      Do we have enough anecdotes to call it data yet? I'm guessing no.

    63. Re:employee improvement plan by Cornwallis · · Score: 1

      Decades ago I worked for The Phone Company when there was only one. I was hired as an Directory Assistance Operator. I was the only guy in a room of almost 100 women. The Phone Company had just started hiring men in traditionally women's jobs and vice versa. I signed on since I wanted to be a lineman or work in a CO. After a few weeks of the mindless work - and it was (and probably is) over a break I mentioned I was thinking of quitting. One of the old-timers who'd been there for almost 30 years told me - and I'll never forget this - "Yeah, I thought about quitting once and they had one of their psychiatrists talk me out of it."

      I hung up my headset in my locker, wrote a note saying "Don't even look for me." and walked out never to return. They called every day for a month.

    64. Re:employee improvement plan by HornWumpus · · Score: 1

      I'm saying you can tolerate someone struggling but getting by on a sideshow (e.g. a crystal reports person, a DBA (backup monkey, not backend programmer much less DB designer) etc).

      You have weird, private definition of 'just hard enough to not get fired'.

      I'm saying that communication overhead is a function of team size squared at best. Keeping core team size down is critical. I do this by doing everything possible to maintain individual productivity.

      --
      John McAfee 'It was like that time I hired that Bangkok prostitute; to do my taxes, while I fucked my accountant'
    65. Re: employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I call it written by HornWumpus ;)

    66. Re:employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Except they don't.

      In my case, they didn't tell me anything and simply used the week or so I was on the plan to scrounge up some lies to tell the Department of Labor. Fortunately, companies that really abuse these weasel tactics sometimes get a bad reputation at DoL so you can contest their lies.

      Remember, it's called unemployment INSURANCE so the tax is actually a premium. So when employers do the equivalent of visiting the emergency room every time they have a hangnail, they're penalized with higher rates. Sadly, many companies don't get the hint and just try to weasel their way out of taking responsibility for their foolish behavior.

    67. Re:employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0
      Whoever invented "employee improvement plan" needs to die.

      This.

      At my last company, there were ranking "bands" from "A" to "F" (paraphrasing for simplicity) and managers were required to distribute x% of their people into band "A" y people into band "B" etc, irrespective of how they actually performed. If you landed in "F" you were pretty much marked for extermination.

    68. Re:employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Your comment is extremely naive. While it may be true in some cases, most of the PIPs are designed to be failed and as a good legal excuse to fire people who underprerform or who do not adapt well to the culture, or simply because they're looking to downsize their teams. I dare say in most cases the decision to let an employee go is already taken, and the PIP is a mere formality to avoid legal implications, which wouldn't be at all so perverse except for that it is usually a bullyish, stressful and abusive process as the company makes all possible efforts to have the sentenced resign voluntarily before having to extend a severance package.

    69. Re: employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I don't live/work in the US, but in my company we occasionally put people on improvement plans. I ended up terminating a guy in my team through one because he was just hopeless at the job (we gave him 4 years, and sent him back to university etc - he had nothing but opportunity).

      I am aware of at least one person in my company who was put on a performance improvement plan who picked up their game and started behaving the way they needed to. They were promoted to Senior Engineer about 18 months ago and are still working here now - they performs a valuable role for the team they're in and are valued by the company (not as highly as others, but still valued).

    70. Re:employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Note that neither 2 nor 3 actually solve the "problem" you propose. There's always a lowest performer, even if everyone you hire performs well above industry average. There *must* be some comparison to an absolute standard.

      And that's the fundamental problem with internal-rank-based systems like the one at Amazon -- there's no concept of "good enough". If you're low man on the totem pole it doesn't matter how good you are in absolute terms, you're still going to be punished. Add to that team politics where managers pick a scapegoat to protect the rest of their team from this capricious culling and you're not only not solving any problems, you're actively making new ones and sabotaging the ability of the review system to support actual improvements.

    71. Re:employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Jack said things like that (though to be clear, it's not part of 6S). The actual practice at GE didn't strongly reflect what he wrote about, and of course he never addressed the issue of tying your internal relative ranking to relevant absolute standards -- it neither deals with the situation where standards are too high because you keep raising the bar, causing you to fire people who are enormously productive, nor with the situation where standards are too low because you're only comparing to whatever level the second-lowest-performing employee is at.

      And don't even consider the impact to turnover when you forcibly remove 10% of your staff each year.

      Basically he talked a big game but didn't actually do what he talked about because while the theory is fun to kick around at cocktail parties it's not very useful for running a typical business.

    72. Re:employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Problem: I'm being forced to increase my weekly beatings quota by %20 each week until such time as morale improves.

    73. Re:employee improvement plan by OrigamiMarie · · Score: 1

      "Improvement plan" at Amazon is generally just a nice way of saying "we're going to give you time to leave with whatever grace you have left, instead of getting fired". Sure there are steps to follow and things to improve, but you've probably already failed two performance appraisals (probably over the course of two years, but maybe only over the course of one year), and they're not really going to give you enough help to pull up in time.

    74. Re:employee improvement plan by Darinbob · · Score: 1

      The alternative though is just to get fired outright without a chance to improve performance.

    75. Re:employee improvement plan by Darinbob · · Score: 1

      It's expensive to fire someone. You have to find a replacement, train the replacement, etc. So instead you tell the employee that things aren't working about but there's a second chance to improve performance and turn things around in 60 days or so. Of course some workers may take the opportunity to use that time to work on the resume...

    76. Re:employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I'm at Amazon, and I'm on the employee improvement plan, just like the fellow who jumped yesterday.

      Good news: Even though I'm under an incredible amount of stress, I have no intention of jumping off a building or hurting myself in any way. I'm talking to recruiters, and I'm talking to a prospective manager on another team. I've got a wife and kids, for pete's sake, I'm not going to be jumping off no buildings! (NB: Double-negative used for humorous emphasis. :-)

      The process goes like this:
      1. The manager puts you on an Employee Coaching Plan, with helpful advice and clearly defined and measurable goals. This lasts for 3 months. If you pass, you're a normal employee again.
      2. If you fail that, then you go on a Personal Improvement Plan, which has even more clearly spelled-out goals. This lasts for 1 month. If you pass, you're a normal employee again.
      3. If you fail that, they fire you.

      Bad news: The extra scrutiny and the fact that your job is on the line causes stress. Stress causes impaired decision-making. Impaired decision-making leads to mistakes. Mistakes lead to more stress. Lather, rinse, and repeat until you get fired. If your boss tells you he doesn't trust you, multiply the stress by two. If your boss tells you to think about your future, multiply again by two. At some point, enough stress can make some people do things that end up in the news.

      Also: While you're on either of these plans, you're blocked from transferring to another team. You have to get special approval from two levels of management to bypass that block.
      Also^2: I heard about someone who told his manager he was going to change teams, and his manager immediately put him on the coaching plan, because he didn't want the employee to go. I'm not sure what the outcome was, but changing companies is *always* an option. Just make sure to give yourself a 1-month break between jobs, just to get your stress levels down.

    77. Re: employee improvement plan by Darinbob · · Score: 1

      Hmm, in California I've never heard to being told not to file for unemployment. It costs the company nothing I think (could be wrong), the cost is paid for by unemployment insurance paid for by every worker. The reason for the severance is to not sue the company for wrongful termination or other hassles that would cost more money than the severance costs.

    78. Re:employee improvement plan by Darinbob · · Score: 1

      And then do they replace the worker? Do they get someone new and untrained and unable to also meet the high standard the first year?

    79. Re:employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Sounds so much friendlier than employee termination checklist.

    80. Re:employee improvement plan by Darinbob · · Score: 1

      Of course, a good manager should be giving the warnings BEFORE needing to put someone on an improvement plan. Getting the improvement plan means getting HR involved, probably getting flack from other people about why projects are late or defective, and so forth. A bad manager however might just let someone slack off until it's too late (maybe the person is best friends with someone high up in the company). I have had the boss call me in to say that I'm not pulling my weight which did do the job of putting me on track.

    81. Re:employee improvement plan by Darinbob · · Score: 1

      That sounds like bad attitude though. Generally this improvement plan isn't being given to someone who is already doing all they can. It does happen sometimes but I don't believe it's the majority of cases. The worker isn't being identified at random as the fall guy, but is most likely being chosen as the person who's performing the worst or is least reliable (maybe someone coasting on past successes). Someone who is doing exceptional work will be kept around as opposed to being replaced by someone who's average.

    82. Re:employee improvement plan by swillden · · Score: 1

      Sure. If the first thing you hear about the problems with your perfomance is an improvement plan, your manager should *also* be on an improvement plan -- a point you should make with HR.

      --
      Note to ACs: I usually delete AC replies without reading them. If you want to talk to me, log in.
    83. Re:employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Don't worry, you're just witnessing the next stage of class warfare. What starts as top 1% vs bottom 1% will spread throughout society until employees are fighting bosses tooth and nail. Eventually, employees will be fighting each other. Welcome to the end my friends...

    84. Re: employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Oh yeah, been there, seen that. Several times with close colleagues.

      In fact, something similar was attempted against me once due to personal conflicts with the manager, but I did switch projects. (And jumping off the top floor of a two story building wouldn't really count as a suicide attempt, I think...)

      I work for Google.

    85. Re:employee improvement plan by micahraleigh · · Score: 1

      I like EIPs. If I got one, I'd have time to re-certify and switch jobs for a nice pay raise.

      If they just fired me I'd have a nasty stain on my resume.

    86. Re: employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      That's exactly how IBM's Performance Improvement Plan works. Put the bottom of a group's stack ranked employees on a PIP regardless of actual performance. Give them unattainable goals over a short time period. And cut them loose with no severance when they fail to "achieve" them.

    87. Re:employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      It can sometimes pay, when confronted with 'managing out' to say "pay me a couple of months, and i'll quit" - some companies see the savings over having someone hanging onto a role during 3-6 months EIP with managerial/hr/legal costs and may accept.

    88. Re:employee improvement plan by hattig · · Score: 1

      Using your example... that depends on whether the programmer is in a role that should be talking directly to the database, has self-identified (e.g., at interview) as knowing SQL and programming language interfaces to it, or has received training in-house to that level via whatever means.

      Maybe the symptom isn't a bad programmer, but an in-house process that doesn't work - in this case maybe the company has an in-house DBA team that does DB programming work (and teams that create microservices that interface with the DB), but they are overloaded or don't respond to work tickets. The programmer has just tried a workaround to get something going rather than being blocked by the process for 4 weeks.

      (yes, I know that any reasonably experienced programmer should know SQL to some level, but these days it's very easy to go years and years without touching it directly)

    89. Re:employee improvement plan by hattig · · Score: 1

      Yes, small teams that work together, who own their own projects, where the projects don't get large (create new projects for new functions) and who aren't held back by external forces as long as they generally follow some basic rules (language, db, api structure, documentation, builds, and so on) generally can get things done.

      Super-large old monolithic architectures that have been appended to over many years and now have a team of 30+ basically maintaining it and desperately splitting the tangled code into seperate services talking via RMI to keep development time down, until they hit serialisation versioning hell, and then morale drops and everyone wonders why the front-end ajax interface is rendered in the server side via some weird codified templating system that results in tears instead of hiring people who know Javascript for the front end and trying to do things simply, cleanly and concisely... well yeah, that can get skilled people down.

      The first case - you have a team owning N microservices. Team gets too big - the split is easy (well, easier than the second case of having separate teams own parts of the same monolithic codebase), two smaller teams, each with N/2 microservices. Best keep some FE and MW on the same teams though, don't go the route of FE team and MW team, that way leads to more intra-team communications.

    90. Re:employee improvement plan by HornWumpus · · Score: 1

      How did he get string concatenation operators into the SQL string?

      He didn't know the language, he couldn't keep quotes matched. Just useless.

      Yes, it should have been a parameterized stored procedure, which should have been behind a middleware object. But working in the real world with imperfect code bases is also reality. IIRC He was being asked to modify the code to add an additional, optional filter ('where' clause on already joined table, based on a control having a selection).

      It was a symptom of growth. They put in professional HR and we got seats filled. They were 'seat fillers' alright.

      --
      John McAfee 'It was like that time I hired that Bangkok prostitute; to do my taxes, while I fucked my accountant'
    91. Re:employee improvement plan by hattig · · Score: 1

      Or you'll get a team that rotates the lowest performing member, as it might require two reviews in a row to hit EIP.

      Shame if that means you get no bonus this year, at least the next four you'll get one. Oh, the company did great this year and the bonus is 3x bigger than normal... oh, you've left?

    92. Re:employee improvement plan by hattig · · Score: 1

      Only do the things in (3) that will help you get a new job.

      The EIP will not be "Just do X, Y, Z", it'll be a weekly-reviewed self-documented long list of things to be attaining. If the company is reasonable, it will be doable. If they want you out, it won't be - so just concentrate on the things that you like the sound of the most, and avoid the soft-skills crap that is hard to quantify.

      If the cause of lower performance is transitory (say, a year long divorce/house move/depression type thing, and the employer is still being harsh on you) then it can be useful to switch job anyway - new jobs are more interesting, learning opportunity, no historical weight, often little legacy crap to deal with - just concentrate on getting through the probation period and hopefully things will ease up in your life (and the stress-break from changing job and losing the EIP will help massively) and then you can move on and forget the bad year or two.

      The biggest issue for an employee is under-motivation and/or procrastination (as in, serious internet addiction level) that is not transitory. In that case, well, yeah - visit all your sites in the evening, leaving the morning at-work surf fairly minimal. Hope the work place blocks sites. Etc.

    93. Re:employee improvement plan by hattig · · Score: 1

      Well yeah, it's hard to argue against that level of incompetence (that's exactly the case of being hired for a skill and then not having that skill). Luckily there's code review and on-the-side feedback to the manager, etc.

    94. Re:employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Would you rather just be fired the first time you did something wrong? The point of the employee improvement plan is to give the employee a chance to rectify any deficiencies in the way they do their job.

      It is actually there to cover the employer, they can put you the plan, then when you don't "improve" they can fire you while having covered themselves against wrongful dismissal.

      Just because something is abused doesn't mean that it shouldn't exist or that it wasn't created with good intentions, for whatever they are worth.

    95. Re: employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      BDDT? Gross. I hope they don't leave you alone with children.

    96. Re:employee improvement plan by lgw · · Score: 1

      saying that communication overhead is a function of team size squared at best. Keeping core team size down is critical. I do this by doing everything possible to maintain individual productivity.

      Alternatively, you might discover that "separation of concerns" is for more than just code. Just as code complexity is kept low by minimizing what one bit of code has to know about another to get things done, communication overhead within a group is kept low through division of responsibility into teams that each clearly own some subset of things. My whole career has been involved in solving problems that are just to big for a "two-pizza team".

      Plus there's always plenty of tedious unchallenging work needing done for any project - letting the top people work only on cool stuff they like is the best retention approach.

      --
      Socialism: a lie told by totalitarians and believed by fools.
    97. Re:employee improvement plan by HornWumpus · · Score: 1

      You'd be amazed what a two pizza team can do.

      I've spent a good part of my career wiping the floor with competitions large teams. Of course KISS has it's limits, but if I can do it with an 8 person team and I'm competing with a 50 person team, I win 99%+ of the time. I've been hired to put in interim systems that are still running years later while the 'permanent solution' is on it's second restart.

      I have been blessed with incompetent competition, and of course, I've got good instincts regarding walking away early if the client is already been blown by one of the big consultancies.

      --
      John McAfee 'It was like that time I hired that Bangkok prostitute; to do my taxes, while I fucked my accountant'
    98. Re:employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      employee improvement plan, a step that can lead to termination if performance isn't improved

      Whoever invented "employee improvement plan" needs to die.

      Spoken like someone who has never been an employer or manager!

    99. Re:employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      That's basically what the improvement plans are about; they're a way to fire people while putting the blame on the people being fired. There's a reason that friends don't let friends work for amazon is becoming a common catchphrase in the tech industry....

    100. Re: employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      The problem is that there are many cases where companies use the employee improvement plan process to fire people who aren't actually bad at their jobs but the companies want them to leave for other reasons and don't want to lay them off with the associated unemployment costs.

      They put the target on said plan in hopes they take the hint and just leave. If not, the employee will be judged to have not sufficiently improved, no matter how they actually perform, and at the end of the EIP deadline they are let go for cause.

      That's the case most of the time, I think. I've seen people put on improvement plans, and the rest of the team expressed surprise because they thought that person was one of their best engineers. The PIP there was purely political -- the justification for it was almost 100% fictional, and HR basically gave that employee the option of signing agreement or being terminated immediately. It's rampant in corporate america, and from what I've seen in 20 years, it's almost never used to improve an employee's performance, but rather almost invariably to get rid of people who might reveal the manager's incompetence to their higher ups.

    101. Re:employee improvement plan by lgw · · Score: 1

      You'd be amazed what a two pizza team can do.

      Right up to the point it stops scaling.

      f course KISS has it's limits, but if I can do it with an 8 person team and I'm competing with a 50 person team, I win 99%+ of the time.

      On the internet, my 3 person team beat 9000 person teams 100% of the time. But bullshit aside, if you're good, why are you still managing just an 8-person team? And why is it a competition? Shouldn't both teams be doing something useful? Are you just being selfish, hoarding the top people to yourself when your org would benefit more by spreading them out?

      I have been blessed with incompetent competition, and of course, I've got good instincts regarding walking away early if the client is already been blown by one of the big consultancies.

      Oh, I get it now, You're a consultant. I expect you wear a tie. And shiny shoes. Well then, have fun with that.

      --
      Socialism: a lie told by totalitarians and believed by fools.
    102. Re:employee improvement plan by SecurityGuy · · Score: 1

      I guess it depends on the company. Around here you don't get put on an "improvement plan" unless you're doing badly enough that firing you is really the only option left. You'd already have had your manager talk to you on multiple occasions about what you needed to fix, and have failed to do that. The improvement plan is just your formal, documented, and last chance to fix it.

      That's how it's used here, anyway.

    103. Re:employee improvement plan by HornWumpus · · Score: 1

      Large teams mean the project will scale? No. Good architectures mean products scale. Team size has _nothing_ to do with it.

      If you are doing it right, the good people seek out your team. So do the bad ones, you have to be able to tell the difference.

      I prefer to continue doing things I'm good at rather than do things I'm not good at. I don't manage large groups well, I remain on technical point.

      --
      John McAfee 'It was like that time I hired that Bangkok prostitute; to do my taxes, while I fucked my accountant'
    104. Re:employee improvement plan by ebvwfbw · · Score: 0

      Whoever invented "employee improvement plan" needs to die.

      Couldn't agree more. I've had to come up with those "employee improvement plans" in the past. All the result of lawsuits, brought to you by people that strongly support the Democratic party. The party of cry babies. Sorry, tell it as it is. It gets ridiculous sometimes just how far you may have to go to show someone is incompetent to can their ass. All to avoid a frivilous lawsuit.

      I even get "anonymous" fan mail after the fact. As if nobody could figure out from the phrases in the letter who it is. So far it's been very obvious.

    105. Re: employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Paul, this is Amazon were talking about. It is the worst tech company to work for by far.
      (If you're in the bottom 95% of the company)

      Annnnnnd heres your anecdote: Friend of mine left there after 5 years of work because she realized it was a soul sucking shit-hole and realized she couldn't be part of that and realized that the culture there brainwashes you to view everyone below whatever level you're at as a demihuman.

      She left and worked at a t-shirt company for a year before moving back into the tech sector.

      Fuck Jeff Bezos, that dude says one thing and does another, if there was a devil, it resides in him.

    106. Re:employee improvement plan by Waccoon · · Score: 1

      Help them to identify why they perform worse than their peers and try to help them improve

      I didn't work for Amazon, but I did work in a warehouse, specifically one that ships medical supplies to hospitals.

      In my case, the newfangled voice picking computer couldn't understand my voice (even simple phrases such as "yes" and "no") and the volume of the headset would go berserk for no reason, toggling between whispering and screaming so loud I was scared it would literally damage my hearing. Getting work done was impossible. No matter how much I tried to reason with management that it wasn't my fault, they insisted that the system was working fine for everyone else. I was simply told that my performance was below 87% and I had two weeks to improve my numbers or I'd be terminated. I quit. I had worked there for 10 years, and the voice picking system had been implemented within the last 10 months (with performance numbers being enforced within the last 3 months or so).

      Looking back, they were probably bluffing, since almost everyone was below the threshold and also received performance warnings. As such, it wasn't a case of "worse than my peers." However, I had better things to do with my life than be bossed around by a screaming computer for 15 hours a day, just to constantly be told by management I wasn't good enough. The job is basically designed to burn you out.

    107. Re:employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Yes, Amazon's plan is broken, you are correct.

      These bullying cost cutting companies (I worked for one) use the "improvement" plan to place people on the "balanced scorecard", "leadership commitment" or some other pseudonym for a Gaussian distribution of best/average/poor performing schemes.

      Biased towards having more people included in the lower performing wing than the upper performance part of the graph, usually.

      Thus justifying the non payment of bonuses to 10% (or higher) "victims" of the upper management fat-cats.

      Besides allowing them to sack people whose "face does not fit".

      I have seen better performing but newer members of the team being put into the poor performing category just because the upper management a-kissers were instructed by the even higher up greedy sociopathic management, that they have not filled their quota imposed on them to pick on n% of their workforce. (n, n+1, n=> infinity)

      Read "Inside the Giant Machine: Confessions of a Former Amazon.com Technologist" by Kalpanik S , or just google all the complaints about working conditions in Amazon.

    108. Re: employee improvement plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Make sign contract that says can't sue Amazon, usually with a severence, all happened to SWIM.....

    109. Re:employee improvement plan by segedunum · · Score: 1

      I thought that was accounting?

      Nope. HR looks after employee wellbeing, and the number one priority there is getting paid.

      HR typically handles employee benefits and is involved in the hiring and firing process as that affects who is receiving the benefits.

      What qualifies HR to hire and fire anyone? You need qualified people who understand the nature of a company's business to do that. That's why so many companies are in such dire trouble.

  7. Look at FACE of Amazon by Durrik · · Score: 3, Informative

    This seems to be very common at Amazon. Going by the FACE site, it shows a clear pattern of abuse, and I'm not surprised that this hasn't happened before.

    Granted the FACE site is posted to those who are usually pissed at Amazon, but with so many postings and so often it shows that there is a clear pattern of employee abuse.

    --
    Software Engineer & Writer of Military Science Fiction and Fantasy Blog: petermwright.com Twitter: WrightPeterM
    1. Re:Look at FACE of Amazon by Nemyst · · Score: 1

      While I absolutely agree that these issues should be addressed, there aren't "so many postings". There's what, 100? 200? Amazon was at over 200,000 employees in 2015. One complaint per thousand employees isn't particularly unusual, hell I'm pretty sure there are way more than this that just never get out of Amazon.

    2. Re:Look at FACE of Amazon by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      This seems to be very common at Amazon. Going by the FACE site, it shows a clear pattern of abuse, and I'm not surprised that this hasn't happened before.

      Granted the FACE site is posted to those who are usually pissed at Amazon, but with so many postings and so often it shows that there is a clear pattern of employee abuse.

      Looks like fake news to me. Shut em down, Mr. Schmidt!

    3. Re:Look at FACE of Amazon by jittles · · Score: 1

      This seems to be very common at Amazon. Going by the FACE site, it shows a clear pattern of abuse, and I'm not surprised that this hasn't happened before.

      Granted the FACE site is posted to those who are usually pissed at Amazon, but with so many postings and so often it shows that there is a clear pattern of employee abuse.

      Hey look at this post from a friend of an Amazon employee! Maybe this person can start a support group? Doesn't sound like Amazon is going to start one.

    4. Re:Look at FACE of Amazon by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Plus, there's no way to check how well the website owners verify the employment status of the submitters - whether they're current or former Amazon employees at all.

    5. Re:Look at FACE of Amazon by segedunum · · Score: 1

      You tend to find it's the tip of the iceberg when you have extremely bad reviews. Most people don't post to such boards.

    6. Re:Look at FACE of Amazon by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Reminds me of the kind of some "Amazon Reviews" by politically motivated individuals against products made by whoever they don't like, tbh.

    7. Re:Look at FACE of Amazon by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      >Most people don't post to such boards.

      Lol, right. Just like the people who don't leave reviews for products that haven't purchased on Amazon! I mean, who would do such thing?

      Trump Make America Great Again Red Cap Collectible Ornament

    8. Re:Look at FACE of Amazon by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Looks like fake news to me. Shut em down, Mr. Schmidt!

      Reminds me of the kind of some "Amazon Reviews" by politically motivated individuals against products made by whoever they don't like, tbh.

      I was being ironic.

    9. Re:Look at FACE of Amazon by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Reminds of me of the Statler Brothers song, "Flowers on the Wall"

    10. Re:Look at FACE of Amazon by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      "I hung it on my tree, but it is so yuge that it has totally unbalanced my whole tree. No matter where I hang it, the tree leans waaaaaay over to the far right. "

      I'm autistic and have an IQ of 75, yet the blinding sarcasm and satire in the reviews is obvious to me. What's your excuse?

  8. Maybe Amazon had a point by JustNiz · · Score: 0, Troll

    Killing yourself just because of a shitty job (that you could just quit from) strongly suggests his mental process/values are pretty fucked up, so maybe he actually also isn't a good employee.

    1. Re:Maybe Amazon had a point by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Glad you live a charmed life where people aren't living on the bread line and there is a queue of 100 people for every 1 job (and automation of low skill work is only going to make it worse). But no, blame the mental process of the desperate like the keyboard warrior you are.

    2. Re:Maybe Amazon had a point by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Killing yourself just because of a shitty job (that you could just quit from) strongly suggests his mental process/values are pretty fucked up, so maybe he actually also isn't a good employee.

      When opportunities are few and far between, you take what you can get.

      And I have worked in those environments and they treat you like shit. You have to be there by 5;30AM and wait around to see if you can work - unpaid.

      If they select you to work that day, you wait in the breakroom until 6:30AM before punching in. If you're not selected, they send you home. So, you've been there for at least an hour - unpaid.

      Then when you shift is done - it could be only 4 hours or 8, you punch out and then wait in line for security to search you - all unpaid.

      So, you are there for at least an hour and a half unpaid. Holiday season it's longer.

      All for minimum wage. And then when the season is over, they don't schedule you.

      When you are in that position where you have to take that kind of work, life looks real shitty. The job is shitty: monotonous, boring, and I went home unable to close my hands. The machines were treated better.

      The bosses were abusive. And if you didn't punch out fast enough - I mean didn't swipe your card/ID fast enough, they yelled at you. And if you made ANY attempt to stick up for yourself - even to say, "Please don't speak to me like that." - they have security or the off-duty cops through your ass out after forcing you through security.

      I tell ya, I got some appreciation for those cube jobs.

      Next story, I tell everyone how when you take a job like that to make ends meet, you ruin your career because you are your last job. It's better to be out of work.

    3. Re:Maybe Amazon had a point by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      This guy worked at HQ, not a warehouse.

    4. Re:Maybe Amazon had a point by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      >Glad you live a charmed life where people aren't living on the bread line and there is a queue of 100 people for every 1 job

      Well, thank you AC. I'm like JustNiz, and I'm happy that you take pleasure in the charmed, wonderful lives we lead!

    5. Re:Maybe Amazon had a point by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Sure, it's never, ever, the individual, always blame the people with money. *One* guy goes suicidal over his bad performance, and you assume it's systemic. Ignore personal responsibility like the commie you are.

    6. Re:Maybe Amazon had a point by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Apparently, mental illness is not what you think it is.

    7. Re:Maybe Amazon had a point by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Driven to suicide is a bit more than not taking personal responsibility, you sadistic asshole.

    8. Re: Maybe Amazon had a point by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      So it is ok to treat like shit everyone who isn't at hq?
      This is a "developed nation" of slaves.
      I'd rather live in Cuba or in North Korea.

    9. Re:Maybe Amazon had a point by JustNiz · · Score: 1

      Then work for yourself or do something to get some education.
      Sorry but as an Immigrant to the US myself, I can tell you it really is the land of opportunity and if you can't do better than a job like that then you really do only have yourself to blame.
      The problem with Americans is they have all been trained to expect everything to be handed to them on a plate.

    10. Re:Maybe Amazon had a point by JustNiz · · Score: 1

      Appologies for generalising. I should have said many Americans, rather than imply all Americans.

  9. "The incident occurred". by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Yay, euphemism. Politically correct, and deadly cold.

    1. Re:"The incident occurred". by coastwalker · · Score: 1

      At my last place of work they used to play this over the speakers when we had layoffs https://www.youtube.com/watch?...

      I think I preferred their honesty to all that euphemism and bullshit

      --
      Facts are history now plebs have politics for religion on social media.
    2. Re:"The incident occurred". by K.+S.+Kyosuke · · Score: 0

      deadly cold

      Hey, he's not dead yet!

      --
      Ezekiel 23:20
  10. Balcony by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    I worked at a company with a 15th floor balcony. They'd chain the doors shut during layoffs.

  11. Now you're terminated by tomhath · · Score: 2

    was placed on an employee improvement plan, a step that can lead to termination if performance isn't improved,

    Stepping off a 12 story building seems like kind of a harsh "improvement plan".

    1. Re:Now you're terminated by __aaclcg7560 · · Score: 1

      The alternative is to "trust" that the coworker standing behind you will catch when you fall backwards. At some places I worked at, stepping off a 12-story building is easier.

    2. Re:Now you're terminated by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      was placed on an employee improvement plan, a step that can lead to termination if performance isn't improved,

      Stepping off a 12 story building seems like kind of a harsh "improvement plan".

      Yeah, it certainly is a step in the wrong direction. You've really got nowhere to go but down.

    3. Re:Now you're terminated by Cro+Magnon · · Score: 1

      The alternative is to "trust" that the coworker standing behind you will catch when you fall backwards. At some places I worked at, stepping off a 12-story building is easier.

      The problem is, if you're falling backwards off a 12 story building, the guy behind you is 12 stories down! I'm as trusting as the next guy, but that's taking it a little too far.

      --
      Slow down, cowboy! It has been 4 hours since you last posted. You must wait another few hours.
  12. So what? Useless suicide effort by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    So what? Jeff Bezos is evil, indeed, but he has power. With power he can do anything. We know Amazon employees are shit and are treated as such. The managers there behave like mad dogs and mad wolfs. So what? Wall street still likes Amazon and at the end of the day it is Jeff Bezos who still is the successful and powerful and symbol of American Dream. Won't be surprised if there are more lives lost, either suicide or otherwise, at Amazon headquarters.

  13. you submission is bad, you should feel bad by Thud457 · · Score: 2
    HOW THE HELL does the submitter miss the headline:

    REPLY ALL nearly KILLS man

    ?!!!

    --

    the preceding comment is my own and in no way reflects the opinion of the Joint Chiefs of Staff

    1. Re:you submission is bad, you should feel bad by tomhath · · Score: 2

      Because it wasn't a Reply All. It was a suicide note.

  14. Alexa by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Alexa made him do it.

    1. Re:Alexa by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      "I'll take suicide for $1000, Alexa."

    2. Re:Alexa by Joe_Dragon · · Score: 1

      He was the President of the International Brotherhood of Teamsters (IBT) union from 1958 until 1971

  15. Show me the e-mail by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    So... where's the e-mail that he sent? Clearly in such moment, near death and everything, he had something important to say?

    1. Re:Show me the e-mail by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      The email said "I voted for Trump"

    2. Re:Show me the e-mail by Archtech · · Score: 1

      If the email said what I think it said, you would have to pry it from Bezos' cold dead hands. After fighting your way through his security force and past his massed army of lawyers.

      --
      I am sure that there are many other solipsists out there.
  16. More information found on a Chinese forum by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    If anyone can read Chinese I think there's more information here, including the manager's name.

    http://www.1point3acres.com/bbs/thread-213784-1-1.html

    1. Re:More information found on a Chinese forum by Pig+Hogger · · Score: 1

      If anyone can read Chinese I think there's more information here, including the manager's name.

      http://www.1point3acres.com/bbs/thread-213784-1-1.html

      Mohammed Alabsi

  17. Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by __aaclcg7560 · · Score: 0

    I was a lead video game tester when my supervisor almost got fired for ignoring my documented warnings that the project I was managing was a slow moving train wreck. That incident was serious enough to get him promoted out of the department. My new supervisor thought I deliberately tried to get my old supervisor fired and told me to not document any his actions for my next project. Since this supervisor had a sleazy reputation of always getting his numbers (including making them up), I told him to bugger off. Every time I documented something he did that adversely affected my project, he wrote me up for insubordination. After he gave me "his way or the highway" speech, I turned in my resignation and got a help desk job that paid more money for a 40-hour work week. (As a lead tester, I worked 60 hours a week for 28 days straight on my last project.) I was the third of a dozen senior testers who left the department before the company went into bankruptcy.

    1. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by 110010001000 · · Score: 1

      Let me guess: you work for the government now in a cushy IT contracting job because that is all you could get?

    2. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      You are a piece of shit posing as a human being.

    3. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      When was he posing? Missed that part.

    4. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by 110010001000 · · Score: 1

      Nailed it!

    5. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by __aaclcg7560 · · Score: 1

      Let me guess: you work for the government now in a cushy IT contracting job because that is all you could get?

      After three years as a video game tester and three years a lead video game tester, I went back to school learn computer programming on a $3,000 tax credit that George W. signed into law after 9/11. I spent the past decade working as an IT support contractor at Cisco, eBay, Fujitsu, Intuit, Google, Sony and many other Fortune 500 companies. I'm in my 22nd year of my technical career doing computer security in government IT, making 50% less money than my Silicon Valley peers because I serve the taxpayers.

    6. Re: Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      So "yes"?

    7. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by jenningsthecat · · Score: 1

      Let me guess: you work for the government now in a cushy IT contracting job because that is all you could get?

      ... I'm in my 22nd year of my technical career doing computer security in government IT, making 50% less money than my Silicon Valley peers because I serve the taxpayers.

      I'm impressed by your CV, but I'm sorry you felt you had to justify yourself to the fuckwit troll you were replying to. I already knew you were a better man than he based on your previous posts in this thread.

      --
      'The Economy' is a giant Ponzi scheme whose most pitiable suckers are the youngest among us and the yet-unborn.
    8. Re: Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by __aaclcg7560 · · Score: 1

      So "yes"?

      Of course. But the question was asked by a troll who already knew the answer. I took the opportunity to present my side of the story by flashing my resume.

    9. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by __aaclcg7560 · · Score: 0

      I'm impressed by your CV, but I'm sorry you felt you had to justify yourself to the fuckwit troll you were replying to.

      I just love trolling the trolls on Slashdot.

    10. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I guess working for the government leaves plenty of time to slack off here on Slashdot. It's only at the taxpayers expense and who cares about them?

    11. Re: Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      What a resume! You sound like a real winner. As a taxpayer I thank you for your service!

    12. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Yeah it is pretty impressive. Wow! Government IT? Who woulda thunk it? He is such a bright guy.

    13. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by __aaclcg7560 · · Score: 1

      I guess working for the government leaves plenty of time to slack off here on Slashdot.

      Much of my job is watching paint dry while waiting for a task to get done. Slashdot exist to keep me amuse while I wait. Of course, I could multitask, work on multiple systems at the same time and risk the possibility of making a mistake. In my particular line of work, people could die if I make a mistake.

      It's only at the taxpayers expense and who cares about them?

      Could be worse. I've seen corporate dysfunction that wasted millions of shareholder dollars. Unless you're a retiree dependent on stock dividends, no one cares about shareholders.

    14. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by serviscope_minor · · Score: 0

      So, an honest salary for an honest day's work and a lack of managerial abuse now counts as cushy? I think your bar is too low and you should consider seeking alternative employment.

      --
      SJW n. One who posts facts.
    15. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Aren't you the contractor that did the desktop rollout one machine at a time over the course of nine months instead of using a multicast deployment in an afternoon?

      You do talk up a big game but when the subject of conversation comes to technical knowledge or skills, there is always disappointment in the quality of discussion when the handle 'creimer' is on a post. Skipping them tends to be more informative.

    16. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by __aaclcg7560 · · Score: 1

      Yeah it is pretty impressive. Wow! Government IT? Who woulda thunk it? He is such a bright guy.

      So are the people I work with. Most are ex-military with zero tolerance for slackers. People who get hired with the idea that a government job means not working are shocked by how much hard work is needed and even more shocked when they're back on the unemployment line for refusing to work.

    17. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      >Much of my job is watching paint dry while waiting for a task to get done

      Not really much of a self-starter, are you?

    18. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by __aaclcg7560 · · Score: 1

      Aren't you the contractor that did the desktop rollout one machine at a time over the course of nine months instead of using a multicast deployment in an afternoon?

      Nope. Unboxed 750 workstations and 1,500 monitors. Reimaged 150 workstations per hour over the network. Data transfer between the old and workstations took forever. The project was scheduled for 12 months and I got it completed in nine months. I also cleaned out a storage closet that no one have seen the floor in eight years that I did in between tickets over a six week period.

      You do talk up a big game but when the subject of conversation comes to technical knowledge or skills, there is always disappointment in the quality of discussion when the handle 'creimer' is on a post. Skipping them tends to be more informative.

      More sour grapes from the peanut gallery.

    19. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by __aaclcg7560 · · Score: 1

      Not really much of a self-starter, are you?

      Not in this particular job where mistakes could easily cost lives.

    20. Re: Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by HornWumpus · · Score: 1

      You deserve a DevOps position. Then you would appreciate having a line or two of support people between you and the users.

      --
      John McAfee 'It was like that time I hired that Bangkok prostitute; to do my taxes, while I fucked my accountant'
    21. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      lol. Slacking off on Slashdot saves lives! You're quite the hero, creimer!

    22. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by __aaclcg7560 · · Score: 1

      lol. Slacking off on Slashdot saves lives! You're quite the hero, creimer!

      Being careful saves lives. I'm on Slashdot while I'm waiting for a script to get finished.

    23. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Well go on, creimer. Tell everyone how waiting for a script to complete and posting on Slashdot is saving lives. I know you're just dying to reveal to us all about this heroic aspect of your job, so go ahead and impress us.

    24. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by __aaclcg7560 · · Score: 1

      Tell everyone how waiting for a script to complete and posting on Slashdot is saving lives.

      It doesn't. Other aspects of my job requires being careful — that save lives. Waiting for scripts and reading Slashdot is a small part of my job on most days.

      I know you're just dying to reveal to us all about this heroic aspect of your job, so go ahead and impress us.

      Might help if you weren't being stupid on purpose. Oh, wait. You're a troll. No wonder you're stupid.

    25. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by 110010001000 · · Score: 1

      Whoa, cleaned out a storage closet AND reimaged workstations? You saved a lot of lives that year.

    26. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by 110010001000 · · Score: 1

      Honest days work? He said he was in government IT? ZING!

    27. Re: Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by 110010001000 · · Score: 1

      Ugh no thanks. He is Cyber-security though, not support. He is keeping us safe from terrorists.

    28. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by 110010001000 · · Score: 1

      How many people died today because you were reading Slashdot?

    29. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by amiga3D · · Score: 1

      I think nowadays that is a pretty cushy job.

    30. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by __aaclcg7560 · · Score: 1

      How many people died today because you were reading Slashdot?

      None.

    31. Re: Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by __aaclcg7560 · · Score: 1

      He is keeping us safe from terrorists.

      And the server team! I had to take over a blotched printer migration because the engineer ran the script and went on vacation. Took me a month to figure out 50% of the ~1,500 printer entries were legit and set them up on the print servers. Just three days before I got finished, the server team pulled the old print servers a month ahead of schedule without notifying anyone. That generated 100+ help desk tickets from outraged users who weren't able to print. No lives were lost. Otherwise, it would be national news.

    32. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      >Might help if you weren't being stupid on purpose.

      Guilty as charged. I'm extremely stupid and trollish. But how does my stupidity prevent you from answering the question? Sure, I mean, I'm stupid so I certainly couldn't understand how waiting around for scripts to complete saves lives, but I think there are other Slashdotters who would be able to appreciate how that would work. Hell, I'm sure there are Slashdotters here who would be extremely interested on how to wait idly by while a script completes and posting to Slashdot and still get paid a good wage, never mind saving life! You owe it to them, creimer. They want to learn.

    33. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by __aaclcg7560 · · Score: 0

      Hell, I'm sure there are Slashdotters here who would be extremely interested on how to wait idly by while a script completes and posting to Slashdot and still get paid a good wage, never mind saving life! You owe it to them, creimer. They want to learn.

      Waiting for a script to finish is watching paint dry. I would rather be doing something than nothing. Multitasking is discourage at this particular job. The fastest way to screw up is to work on a dozen systems, loose track of what you're doing, reboot the wrong system at the wrong time, and endangering someone's life because the computer wasn't available. When I'm working on a system, I'm working on one system at a time and not reading Slashdot.

      Most of the private sector jobs that I had at Fortune 500 companies can be done in the first hour and read Slashdot for the rest of the day. Only Google kept me busy at light speed for an entire work shift. I laugh every time an employer tells me that they have a busy work environment.

    34. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by __aaclcg7560 · · Score: 1

      Whoa, cleaned out a storage closet AND reimaged workstations? You saved a lot of lives that year.

      The IT manager was especially happy with the storage closet since he got back 600 square feet of usable space.

    35. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Oh, c'mon. Just give us a little hint about how your job entails saving lives, please. I beginning to have my doubts now.

    36. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by __aaclcg7560 · · Score: 0

      Oh, c'mon. Just give us a little hint about how your job entails saving lives, please. I beginning to have my doubts now.

      Hospital environment.

    37. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by serviscope_minor · · Score: 1

      ooookayy. Why don't you go and join roman_mir over there in the crazy corner.

      --
      SJW n. One who posts facts.
    38. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Welp, I'm still don't grok how non-multitasking helps save lives, particularly in a IT environment, but you answered the question so I'll leave it at that.

    39. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by __aaclcg7560 · · Score: 1

      Welp, I'm still don't grok how non-multitasking helps save lives, particularly in a IT environment, but you answered the question so I'll leave it at that.

      Let's consider an actual scenario: you got an IT tech who is multitasking on a dozen system, doesn't notice that one of the systems wasn't supposed to be on the general VLAN, and accidentally reboots an operating room system during the middle of a medical procedure. Fortunately, the patient didn't die while the medical staff halted procedure until the system rebooted. The tech got fired.

    40. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      The private sector is just brimming with crybabies and victims. Most of those clowns couldn't cut it in the public sector. Sometimes I swear the media's real job is to lie about how cushy we all supposedly have it to distract these fools from their own miserable lives. And then they wonder why we don't give a damn about their mostly self-inflicted problems.

    41. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      michaeljacksoneatingpopcorn.gif

    42. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I just want to say thank you, to both Mr.Numbers and Kramer over there, I was about to jump off my my THIRTEEN story amazon warehouse, but reading this conversation back and 4th has convinced me that life is worth living.

    43. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by hattig · · Score: 1

      Sheesh creimer, you should have parallelised that script in your free time and run it on the non-existent compute cluster ... blah blah blah.

      It's the jobs without slack time where the mistakes get made (at all levels). Let the employee kick back occasionally, surf the web (hell, reading technical websites is hardly the worst thing you can do in a technical role), do things safely.

      And hell, if your manager has told you to only do one task/story at a time, then who am I to say you shouldn't!

    44. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Let's consider an actual scenario: you got an IT tech who is multitasking on a dozen system, doesn't notice that one of the systems wasn't supposed to be on the general VLAN, and accidentally reboots an operating room system during the middle of a medical procedure. Fortunately, the patient didn't die while the medical staff halted procedure until the system rebooted. The tech got fired.

      Sounds like the tech put it on the wrong VLAN to begin with, which means that "multi-tasking" wasn't his problem - being a sloppy shithead when originally configuring the system & its networking was. If he's multi-tasking, why isn't his script checking that "one of the systems wasn't supposed to be on the general VLAN" before it does invasive operations?

      But, I suppose a self-starter like you already has root caused the issue, and gone out and implemented network scanning to double-check and enforce the configurations of your systems, such that it's *impossible* to put an operating room system on the wrong vlan. Right?

      Must be nice to have such low expectations and limited prospects.

    45. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by __aaclcg7560 · · Score: 1

      Sounds like the tech put it on the wrong VLAN to begin with, which means that "multi-tasking" wasn't his problem - being a sloppy shithead when originally configuring the system & its networking was.

      The medical IT team was responsible for configuring that system. They are human like the rest of us and sometimes make mistakes.

      If he's multi-tasking, why isn't his script checking that "one of the systems wasn't supposed to be on the general VLAN" before it does invasive operations?

      A misconfigured system looks like any other system on the General VLAN to a script. That's why a tech has to individually inspect each system ONE AT A TIME to ensure that they can work on it. Multitasking is dangerous and strongly discouraged by our management team. Take the time, get it right and move on is the purpose of our job.

      But, I suppose a self-starter like you already has root caused the issue, and gone out and implemented network scanning to double-check and enforce the configurations of your systems, such that it's *impossible* to put an operating room system on the wrong vlan. Right?

      We have a process for reporting up the chain of command that the medical IT team misconfigured a system. That group is responsible for ensuring that every system is properly configured, and to make sure it doesn't show up again on next month's Nessus scan.

      Must be nice to have such low expectations and limited prospects.

      This job is a major stepping stone in my career. I have high expectations and unlimited prospects in the InfoSec field.

    46. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      A misconfigured system looks like any other system on the General VLAN to a script. That's why a tech has to individually inspect each system ONE AT A TIME to ensure that they can work on it.

      If a tech can "individually inspect it," then so can a script. There are decision criteria that tech is using to determine if it's safe to work on the system, and those can be distilled programmatically. We're not talking "deep learning" to check the vlan, check the installed software, check who's logged in, etc. This assertion that ONLY a human can do this inspection is not only wrong, it embraces a risky mindset that is actively harmful to your stated intent of being safe.

      If you leave it up to individual techs, you are requiring that every individual tech have exactly the same thought process and inspection criteria. For someone who says he's so into the idea of saving lives, you sure are intent on preserving a mechanism which actively risks lives.

      We have a process for reporting up the chain of command that the medical IT team misconfigured a system. That group is responsible for ensuring that every system is properly configured, and to make sure it doesn't show up again on next month's Nessus scan.

      I see. So rather than fix the problem, and put systems in place to ensure that they're not repeated, you take the bureaucrat's approach of "filing a report, and ensuring that somebody else will fix the problem eventually." Self-starter material, indeed!

      This job is a major stepping stone in my career. I have high expectations and unlimited prospects in the InfoSec field.

      Not based on your postings here, that's for shit sure.

    47. Re:Gotta love the Employee Improvement Plan... by __aaclcg7560 · · Score: 1

      If a tech can "individually inspect it," then so can a script.

      Sure, if the system is properly configured. Otherwise, the system is just another system that looks like every other system on the general network. It takes a human being to make a judgment call, send out emails, make repairs and update the report status.

      If you leave it up to individual techs, you are requiring that every individual tech have exactly the same thought process and inspection criteria.

      Which is why everyone is extensively trained to deal with the systems in the exact same way. That's more training I've ever gotten in the 20 years that I've worked in the private sector.

      I see. So rather than fix the problem, and put systems in place to ensure that they're not repeated, you take the bureaucrat's approach of "filing a report, and ensuring that somebody else will fix the problem eventually."

      This is a government operation. Processes are in place to deal with issues. For the medical IT team, their response time is four hours or less after being notified of a problem.

      Not based on your postings here, that's for shit sure.

      I have 800+ connections on LinkedIn to recruiters that I've talked to over during my career. I get 20+ phone calls from recruiters per day. Based on the feedback of my management team and recruiters I've talked, your opinion on Slashdot doesn't matter.

  18. ze kampz by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    burn burn burn

  19. Employee suicides are on the rise, so?.. by mi · · Score: 1

    Workplace suicides are on the rise — why is one at Amazon considered particularly newsworthy? Are not Bloomberg and Slashdot encouraging some poor slob to do it, by promising them a bit of post-mortem glory, however fleeting?

    --
    In Soviet Washington the swamp drains you.
    1. Re:Employee suicides are on the rise, so?.. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      As someone who has been suicidal in the past...

      Fuck you.

    2. Re:Employee suicides are on the rise, so?.. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      The guy wrote a GBCW email and sent it to hundreds of co-workers including the CEO. Of course this was a pathetic plea for attention like most suicides are.

    3. Re:Employee suicides are on the rise, so?.. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I bet you're the edgiest kid in your whole high school!

  20. Waaaaaaaaa by BlytheBowman · · Score: 0

    Cry me a fucking river. He is lucky to have a job in the first place. If he can't do his job, well, he can practice saying "Would you like fries with that?". They probaly need to do what Foxconn does and install anti-suicide nets at Amazon

    1. Re:Waaaaaaaaa by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      TRUMP will fix it

    2. Re:Waaaaaaaaa by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to you.

    3. Re:Waaaaaaaaa by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Why you should care and how it could effect you personally in a very bad way. When people have mental health issues and crack, they can go two ways. Suicidal or homicidal. Suicidal is more common, but homicidal tends to make the news a fair bit more. That guy you're saying "waaa cry me a river", you'd better hope cracks in a way favorable to you. But at any rate, work place suicides aren't a good sign either way.

      Beyond that, have some fucking compassion at a basic level. And if compassion is beyond you, you have a facebook profile and presumable a real name as your profile. You realize callousness like that can actually cost you your job. You don't want to provide proof positive that you're are actually as big of a dick as your co-workers no doubt already suspect you are.

    4. Re:Waaaaaaaaa by Kagato · · Score: 2

      Lucky? I can't speak to the West Coast, but here in the Midwest it's a job seekers market. Companies are lucky to get people for interviews.

      Amazon does tend to hire young with slight under market salaries and a big carrot of stock back loaded. Getting put on a PIP means the dude threw away however many years at Amazon and was going to lose his stock. He could have made more and worked less somewhere else.

      On the other hand there are parts of Amazon that hire older PhDs and have a slower R&D pace. But that's the exception, not the norm.

  21. Just a euphemism, or do they actually try? by swb · · Score: 2

    Is an "employee improvement plan" literally just a euphemism for the fast track to termination everywhere, or are there places where it's taken seriously and efforts are made to actually improve an employee's performance?

    It sure seems like EIPs only really exist as a way to get rid of an employee -- set unreachable goals, make them pariahs who other employees would keep at arm's length, flag them for increased scrutiny of metrics generally ignored for other employees, basically create the cover for termination with cause and denial of any unemployment benefits.

    But are there companies that actually use them to help right a floundering employee and make them successful? Acknowledge that company process is imperfect, managers aren't either, the employee in question is skilled but maybe not an ideal fit for the team they're placed in? Any companies actually take seriously the idea they have a fair amount invested in someone they've already hired and that it may make sense to actually do something to make the employee work out vs. starting over?

    As a contractor, I know I've walked into places where my skills were ideal for the job but where all manner of circumstances (people, management, resources) left my performance substandard, despite doing the same thing well just previously elsewhere and then moving on to do the same thing well at a new location. Objectively I should have done equally well at companies A, B & C but for reasons that seem external to me, B works less well.

    1. Re:Just a euphemism, or do they actually try? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I have seen performance improvement plans used to good effect in the public sector.

    2. Re:Just a euphemism, or do they actually try? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      There definitely are places where EIP's are taken seriously. I've had several direct reports on such plans and never had to recommend firing any of them. One went on to be a supervisor eventually. Another did end up terminating after successfully completing the plan. The others worked on their problems, solved them and still work for the same company, though not all still for me directly.
      The one employ that terminated was really not a good fit for the job he was in, and even after completing the EIP decided on his own that he would fit in better somewhere else. We did have a fair amount invested in him, but in the long run his leaving was better for both of us. Still there was no intention to push him to quit. His EIP addressed specific issues, which were resolved by him before he made his decision to move on.
      Unemployment benefits (in the U.S.), in reality a type of insurance paid for by the employer, is meant to cover employees who are terminated through no fault of their own. Being an unproductive employee or quitting your job because it sucks doesn't qualify as "terminated through no fault of your own." Some may disagree with this requirement but it's based on the premise that society as a whole has no responsibility that you like your job, and that if you are excepting pay to do a job then you should earn it by doing what you've been hired to do.

    3. Re:Just a euphemism, or do they actually try? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I haven't been on the receiving end of an "employee improvement plan" but I've had multiple coworkers placed on them. In every case, it was management's first step at termination, and it was hardly ever justified.

      One guy got hired in during a crunch, he was vastly overqualified with a salary to match but they needed an SAP guy "right now" so they hired him. A few months later with that project complete, they were sick of writing his big check, so he was told he needed to make more effort to bring his team up to his skill level, despite not being in any kind of supervisory or training role. A couple months later they said he hadn't met expectations and out the door he went.

      At one company we had 3 women working a receptionist role in shifts (24x7 facility). All 3 at the same time were reprimanded for sending and receiving personal emails at work. Every single employee at the company sent and received personal emails at work, nobody gave a shit, except about these 3 all at once. A month later they fired all 3 for continuing to receive (not send) personal emails, how do you prevent someone else from sending you an email? They moved receptionist duties to the Jr Linux Admin role who was now expected to answer all incoming calls and get people in/out of the facility, on top of their actual job. 2/5 of those guys promptly quit, resulting in enormous overtime for the other 3 for months on end, but hey, we saved a few bucks by eliminating the minimum wage receptionists, no doubt management got heavy bonuses...

      One guy loved his beer and would sometimes have a few mugs on his lunch break. Nobody cared until a new HR lady came aboard, and he was promptly reprimanded for drinking during work hours. They worked out some plan where he'd work through lunch instead of going out for a pint, and in exchange he took off an hour early. None of us cared about that either, but a few months later she canned him for not being compliant with business work hours, despite her having put him on those hours to start with.

      The one time it was really warranted, we had a guy who was doing great for a year but all of a sudden started calling out sick constantly for minor things. Once a week something different would hurt. My back hurts today so I can't come to work, my ankle is killing me today so I can't come to work, etc., never anything quantifiable. We never did figure out what had suddenly happened in his life (found a girlfriend, maybe) but he was put on a plan to "work back" the extra sick time and told he'd be gone if he missed more than once a month. The following week he called out because, swear to god, he had a papercut on his finger and couldn't type well. He was told not to bother returning, and good riddance, it was the only time I've ever seen a justified performance improvement plan.

      To wrap up my anecdote, I've never seen someone put on one of these plans who _wasn't_ fired soon after. They aren't out to improve the employee. They're out to fire the employee, and have a CYA reason for it on paper.

    4. Re:Just a euphemism, or do they actually try? by Darinbob · · Score: 1

      No, I think managers do take it seriously. It is hard to get a replacement worker, unless you're in a job where anyone in the field can do the same job with no additional training. New employee has to learn the new company, learn the new products that are built, learn how to work with the team, learn the new tools, etc. Company has to spend time finding someone who has the skills and is looking for a job, willing to relocate, can start soon before the project goes off the rails for not having enough workers, etc.

      Now it's true that for some workers the company may just have given up, they know that Bozo won't ever manage get the job done without hand holding, but they have to do the PIP, EIP, or whatever process before they can fire someone. But there are indeed cases where they want the employee to improve and stick around. These decisions are being made most of the time by direct managers, not by some top level bean counter, and the direct managers know these workers personally (and it's a pain in the ass for the manager to deal with also).

    5. Re:Just a euphemism, or do they actually try? by dnormant · · Score: 1

      Many years ago, I had a really bad attitude. I was lazy and resentful. Flippant and disrespectful. My boss was my friend and over beers he told me to straighten my ass out. I didn't. He put me on and EIP and I realized I had wandered too far. That was my wake up call and I straightened my attitude out. It was embarrassing but it worked for me.

      OTOH I have seen it misused too, but not on me.

    6. Re:Just a euphemism, or do they actually try? by swb · · Score: 1

      When I supervised employees, I was told denial of unemployment (at least in this state) meant termination for cause and I think most of them willful causes, like absenteeism, criminal behavior, gross negligence and insubordination.

      Poor performance didn't cut it for denial of benefits because the onus was on the company for setting achievable productivity and hiring qualified people, and substandard output was always seen as a company hiring and/or management fault, not an act of willfulness on the employees part. One a company hires an individual they are basically validating that the employee is qualified for the position and that they believe they are capable of doing it.

      Of course at will employment means you can fire them anyway, but it dings your unemployment compensation.

      The same was true of mistakes or errors -- barring insubordination or gross negligence, if they make a mistake it's the employer's fault for not managing errors. In many cases, the employer has granted and required some decision making authority of the employee and they own the results of those errors.

    7. Re:Just a euphemism, or do they actually try? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Once on PIP, there is no way to succeed, take it from someone who isnt me, that it happened to. No matter projects accomplished, no matter how well did, was still termed. The other employees were in shock when someone who isnt me was terminated, as that person had a lot of knowledge of how things ran.

  22. Medical leave by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    I once worked for a Fortune 50 company and developed mental health issues.

    I was seeing a psychiatrist but didn't tell my employer.

    My work was suffering and I was about to be put on an "improvement plan."

    I told my boss I was seeing a shrink.

    She sent me to HR and I was put on medical leave.

    I eventually returned from the leave.

    I didn't attempt suicide.

    1. Re:Medical leave by segedunum · · Score: 1

      You were lucky to have medical leave and for your employer to give you time off.

  23. It's a shit place to work. by Khyber · · Score: 4, Interesting

    One of my former co-workers from the porno business got a job at Amazon. She quit within a week and told me "I'd rather go back to the porno shop, at least there they bother to give you lube for when you get fucked."

    That alone tells me all I need to know about Amazon, and I'll never shop there. If one of my co-workers from a very tough industry couldn't hack something supposedly so simple and benign as Amazon warehouse work when she had no problems sorting and packing and selling boxes of DVDs and lube and sex toys, there's something seriously fucking wrong with Amazon's management and policies and procedures.

    --
    Still waiting on Serviscope_minor to wake up to fucking reality and realize that Jessica Price isn't going to fuck him.
    1. Re:It's a shit place to work. by wyHunter · · Score: 0

      Oh, but wait, it's based in the liberal mecca of Seattle, you know the bastion of workers rights.....

    2. Re:It's a shit place to work. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      That alone tells me all I need to know about Amazon, and I'll never shop there.

      I had about $80 worth of books I needed to order last night. Amazon would have been easier but I went with Barnes and Noble because of the stories about the Amazon warehouse conditions from a couple years back. Now that this story broke, it looks like I made the right decision.

    3. Re:It's a shit place to work. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      It isn't really here especially with regard to vacation time. My roommate worked there, and she only got a little over sixty days off over an entire year. That wore her out. I work for Boeing and get 128 days off each year (52 weeks * 2 weekend days per week + 9 "bank" holidays + 3 weeks vacation * 5 days). It's great. When I worked for a start-up owned by a former Microsoft SVP, we only were allowed 25 days off a year. That means you only had one day off about every two weeks. It was brutal.

    4. Re:It's a shit place to work. by OhPlz · · Score: 1

      Sales decrease, people lose their jobs, driven to mental health issues..

    5. Re:It's a shit place to work. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      >One of my former co-workers from the porno business got a job at Amazon

      I would to be a fly on the wall for her non-porn related job interviews, I guess would that be the only time an interviewer could legally ask the job seeker sexually explicit questions.

      Interviewer: Ok, says here on your resume that you are proficient multi-tasker
      Job seeker: Yes.
      Interviewer: And you base that on an example of a 5 way that you performed in Rod Gobblers 3:The Reckoning?
      Job seeker: Um, yes.
      Interviewer: Ok, so perhaps you could expound a little on the logistics involved with that performance? What job skills did you acquire that would make you a good fit for Amazon.com?
      Job seeker: Uh, well... If I sucked your dick, will you give me a job?
      Interviewer: Well, it certainly won't hurt your chances (unzips trousers)

    6. Re:It's a shit place to work. by _merlin · · Score: 1

      How is that even legal in the US? I thought you were supposed to be a "free country" with workers' rights and all.

    7. Re:It's a shit place to work. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Depends on what type of "work" she is used to. If she came from a labor-intensive farm worker job and couldn't do Amazon, that would be a bad sign for Amazon. But for a fucking movie star, to have to do some manual labor ... ? Or a grip who sits around waiting for the actors to finish? I think it's princess syndrome, at least lazy Millenial disease, partially. Her story is not a story I can relate to.

    8. Re:It's a shit place to work. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      We have great workers rights here. I'm able to quit any time, and even negotiate at any time for higher pay. I made them pay and pay a lot.

  24. suicide attempt by fahrbot-bot · · Score: 2

    ... but was placed on an employee improvement plan, a step that can lead to termination if performance isn't improved, ...

    Won't look good on his performance report. "Employee fails to complete tasks in a timely fashion."

    --
    It must have been something you assimilated. . . .
    1. Re:suicide attempt by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      ... but was placed on an employee improvement plan, a step that can lead to termination if performance isn't improved, ...

      Won't look good on his performance report. "Employee fails to complete tasks in a timely fashion."

      He also put forward minimal effort as well. According to the link in Wooky Monster's post, the guy actually jumped off a 4 story section attached to the 12-story building. But even then, he didn't hit the ground, but instead landed on a balcony about 20 feet below.

  25. Cold-hearted and brainless? by jandersen · · Score: 3, Informative

    I don't know what you imagine you get out of being callous - other than making yourself look slightly less than human. Workplace bullying really ought to be something that everybody worried about; nobody is immune to the very serious, mental health problems that this can cause, and trying to appear "tough" only makes you all the more vulnerable.

    1. Re:Cold-hearted and brainless? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      >Workplace bullying

      Strawman, TFA never mentioned anything about "workplace bullying"

      In the e-mail, the man expressed criticism of how the company handled his transfer request, and he hinted that he might harm himself, according to the person.

    2. Re:Cold-hearted and brainless? by jandersen · · Score: 1

      Strawman, TFA never mentioned anything about "workplace bullying"

      It is what we call a reasonable guess. It's also a very reasonable to start talking about workplace bullying, even if this guy didn't kill himself because of it, because workplace bullying is a very major problem, that not only causes real, serious mental health problems, but also undermines morale in general and ultimately hurts productivity and profitability.There are several studies that have shown this, but really, it is just common sense, I would have thought.

  26. Republican Bezos by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    This is what the Republican Trump-supporter Bezos wants for us. Like all his Republican brethren, he wants to get everybody a good-paying job and take away all of the handouts so that we jump off buildings and kill ourselves. They truly hate us. This is the way of the Republican kind. Like Bezos.

    1. Re:Republican Bezos by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Bezos has spent a lot of money trying to destroy Trump with WashPo. He's no Republican, I assure you. Democrats are some of the most evil fuckers, the difference is that they do a better job duping people into thinking that they "care" because of welfare giveaways, welfare rolls that only increase, because the DNC and its elite funders flood the US job market with foreign aliens and drive jobs overseas. This allows DNC to exploit growing poverty it helps create by expanding the welfare vote. They then scapegoat your average white christian struggling to get by for being the cause of everything that i wrong with the country and that if we exterminate white christians and flood the country with third world cheap labor, everything will be wonderful. A huge throng of banksters and large corporations bankrolled the DNC and Clinton, who through destroying american jobs with free trade, overegulation and so on, and fueling as speculative real estate bubble that makes housing unaffordable, skyrocketing taxes and regulations, regulating small business out of business, H1B visas and immigration invasions, are destroying the American worker and block off pathways to the middle class. The DNC can then use the disaster they and their banksters cause to argue for totalitarian massive government to create a nanny state Fuck the DNC. What you need to fix this country is 1) stop all immigration 2) restore the family and family values, families should take care of the elderly and each other, not government 3) get out of free trade 4) kill H1Bs, 5) deport aliens. 6) small businesses where people can own their own businesses.. DNC will do none of these things because all of these things would shrink government and make america independant and give people back control of their lives, rather than expand governments control over their lives.Their goal for you is drive you to poverty with their mexican aliens, and then massively expand government to control every aspect of you, and enable all of this with their mexican voters which they can buy with welfare votes, who want the free welfare giveaways and will vote for anyone to get that.

  27. From the 4th floor by Wookie+Monster · · Score: 5, Informative

    The jump wasn't from the 12th floor, which is why he survived. He only fell about 20 feet. http://www.seattlepi.com/local...

    1. Re:From the 4th floor by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Which is more than enough, and cosidering the circumstances, too much.

    2. Re:From the 4th floor by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Teh circumstances? Like a rejected departmental transfer request? LOL.

      Kudos for Amazon to put him in a program allowing him to work on raising his performance, and not simply making this guy someone else's problem by letting him go to another department.

    3. Re:From the 4th floor by Paul+Carver · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Ok, I'm sorry for being insensitive, and maybe Amazon is a horrible place to work, but maybe this guy wasn't entirely a stellar performer who was unfairly underrated.

      If you attempt suicide by jumping from the fourth floor of a twelve story building and you don't even double check that you've got a full four floors to fall, what conclusions might we draw about your ability to plan and complete your assigned tasks?

      Ending your own life is a pretty important decision and not something you should just handle in a half-assed manner. If you half-ass your own suicide I wouldn't be surprised if you half-ass a lot of other stuff, including your paid day-job responsibilities.

    4. Re:From the 4th floor by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      >what conclusions might we draw about your ability to plan and complete your assigned tasks?

      Well, in this instance I think he knew exactly what he was doing, and it wasn't actually trying to commit suicide.

    5. Re: From the 4th floor by Volanin · · Score: 4, Funny

      20' is 2D6 falling damage. He's badass.

      --
      If I clone myself, can I call it a thread?
      If a girl winks to us, can I call it a race condition?
    6. Re:From the 4th floor by iggymanz · · Score: 1

      let's at least wait until we find out whether he went head first or not, neglecting to consider possibility of rotation. that oversight would only qualify as three-quartered or more assed rather than half

    7. Re:From the 4th floor by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Well, considering a building story is on average 10-13 feet, falling 20 feet off a 4 story building is pretty much falling halfway, or less. So describing it as a "half-assed" job is quite appropriate, I think.

    8. Re: From the 4th floor by NotAPK · · Score: 1

      C'mon, we don't know what he rolled on his dexterity saving throw. He may have escaped with half of that!

    9. Re:From the 4th floor by hattig · · Score: 1

      Most suicides are often cries for help at some level or another. The guy probably didn't want to die but felt there was no other path forward.

      The fact that details about the employee's status at work are in the story are a major issue, IMO, a massive breach of employee confidentiality.

  28. don't look down by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    "only one way out"

  29. Lots of companies don't fit by sjbe · · Score: 1

    From the various anecdotes I've heard about Amazon, I sure as hell wouldn't want to work there.

    You could say that about any number of companies. Cultural fit is an important consideration at any job. Google is a great place to work for some but it would be a terrible place for me personally. We have people at my company who do jobs that I'm perfectly capable of doing but would absolutely loathe doing. Sometimes one part of a business can be a good fit and another branch of the same company can be a terrible fit.

    Is Amazon a great or terrible place to work? I think that depends on your personal perspective. Probably doesn't fit most of us well but obviously some people think it is fine.

  30. Hurry up with the Bots by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Everyone knows they can't do stairs.
    http://i.imgur.com/mKmJyrn.png

  31. Large groups = People with issues by sjbe · · Score: 3, Informative

    If you get 20,000 people together for ANY reason, you are going to get at least a few who are not mentally well. The US has 12.1 suicides per 100,000 people annually. That means that in a random group of 20,000 people in the USA you would expect 2-3 of them to try to (successfully) commit suicide in a given year and presumable some number more to attempt it. One guy in a company that large does not justify drawing any deeper conclusions than he was one of those 2-3 people.

    1. Re:Large groups = People with issues by Shane_Optima · · Score: 1

      That means that in a random group of 20,000 people in the USA you would expect 2-3 of them to try to (successfully) commit suicide in a given year

      Even if we're going to stick to the actuarial, I'd say you should probably correct that for a few factors first before declaring "nothing to see here." Unemployed people are more likely to commit suicide, for instance. And how many people choose to do it at work in an explicit attempt to make a statement against their employers?

      (Not that I'm anti-Amazon here; I tend to think the demonization of specific corporations is a red herring that never solves anything and distracts us from real structural reforms we could be implementing.)

    2. Re:Large groups = People with issues by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Yes, but the people who commit suicide are not perfectly evenly distributed among society, they would tend to be people who are marginalised by society - those with mental illness, living in poverty, with disabilities, survivors of abuse or those with terrible childhoods, the elderly, etc.

      *Generally* people who have full time jobs are not members of those groups. So while it might be 12.1 per 100,000 people annually, it might only be 1-2 suicides per 100,000 full-time workers annually, which means out of 20,000 full time workers, 1 suicide actually is an aberration.

    3. Re:Large groups = People with issues by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      The US has 12.1 suicides per 100,000 people annually. That means that in a random group of 20,000 people in the USA you would expect 2-3 of them to try to (successfully) commit suicide in a given year and presumable some number more to attempt it. One guy in a company that large does not justify drawing any deeper conclusions than he was one of those 2-3 people.

      Except that Amazon does not employ people at random, especially at their HQ.

    4. Re:Large groups = People with issues by fuzzywig · · Score: 1

      So how many suicide attempts happen at other similarly sized companies?

  32. 4. Help management identify why they are at fault. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    4. Help management identify why they are at fault.

    5. Help co-workers and peers identify why they are at fault.

    6. Help the "team" (yes - sarcasm quotes) identify why they are at fault.

    I could go on all day. Supposed employee poor performance is so often caused by factors outside the employees control that to not even consider them means you are incompetent or malicious. Or like most managers I knew, both.

  33. HE ONLY FELL 20 FEET?? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    EDITOR:Summary should be updated to correct misleading impression that the guy lept off and fell 12 stories. The actual truth of the matter is that he leaped off a 4 story section connected to a 12 story building, and even then he didn't reach the ground, but instead landed on a balcony about 20 feet below.

  34. Look at the *rate* of suicide (attempts) at Amazon by Geste · · Score: 1

    You don't want make judgments bases on single cases without comparing rates at Amazon against rates at other companies.

    Of course, in the not-too-distant future, we will All be working at Amazon, so comparisons of that type may be hard to make.

  35. So? by nospam007 · · Score: 1

    Every day 117 people commit suicide. (avg)

    Where did the other 116 people work?

    1. Re:So? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Ambulance service, Accident and Emergency, Undertakers ?

    2. Re:So? by Not-a-Neg · · Score: 1

      They worked at some place that is not important to nerds, this is Slashdot.org, not dailykos.com

      --
      -==- Buy a Mac and leave me alone!
  36. Amazon's Employee Improvement Plan: by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Take this job and and be happy or take a flying leap.

  37. Didn't die by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Couldn't even do THAT right...

  38. Don't feel sorry for him by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    He only fell 20 feet. http://www.seattlepi.com/local/article/Amazon-worker-leaps-from-building-at-Seattle-10640986.php

    A Seattle Fire Department spokesperson confirmed that a man jumped from a rooftop at an Amazon building at Ninth Avenue North and Thomas Street. The rooftop was about four stories up -- the pedestal section of the 12-story high-rise -- but the man fell only about 20 feet to a balcony below, Lt. Harold Webb, with Seattle Fire, said. He was taken to Harborview Medical Center with non-life-threatening injuries.

    I doubt he had any injuries and was simply taken to the hospital for psychiatric observation.

  39. Confirmation bias by Solandri · · Score: 2

    If you only listen to people who quit from working at company, of course you're going to hear it's a terrible place to work. If they didn't think so, they likely would still be working there.

    To get a balanced view of what working at the company is really like, you need to sample (hear testimonials from) both people who quit working there, and people who are still working there. Maybe Amazon is evil incarnate. Or maybe the things they did are perfectly normal, it just tickled one of her pet peeves that wouldn't have bothered 98% of the population.

    If the people still working there say it's a shit place to work, then you've got something worth reporting.

  40. Of course by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    His Employee Improvement Plan cited "propensity to jump off medium-tall buildings".

  41. Too bad by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    he didn't die! As a business owner I know how evil employees can be. Sometimes I just wish I was allowed to shoot them in front o their families! His death would have improved Amazon's stock! Firings lead to better stock! What does that tll you? That employees are cockroaches only looking to steal from hard working business men!

    Good thing I am running a business from a country where employees rights are the same as those of dung! Otherwise we would never make a profit. Employees always whine and want raises. Fucking animals! They should be grateful I let them to live and don't work the to death as I should!

  42. Blame lawyers... by gosand · · Score: 1

    From my experience, you have to put someone on a performance improvement plan before they can be fired.
    You have to have a paper trail showing what steps were taken to try to improve performance.
    If they can't improve after X amount of time, then you have the green light to fire them.

    All of this is because of legal reasons, so that you have ammunition if they decide to sue the company.
    As with most things that seems stupid, lawyers (or the fear of them) are usually to blame.

    --

    My beliefs do not require that you agree with them.

  43. Sad by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    This is very sad, I feel badly for this guy.

    On a related note, a good friend of mine worked as a programmer in their Seattle office. He quit, telling me they treat people like sh*t and it wasn't worth it. That was a few years ago, so I believe this person above may have been suffering a culture there that Amazon has yet to deal with.

  44. Not a reflection on Amazon by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    A similar thing happened when I worked at Cisco about 10 years ago. A guy had a mental breakdown, forced his way into the CEO's office and shouted a bit until security detained him and handed him over to the police.

  45. Shades of Amazon Japan by luis_a_espinal · · Score: 1

    The man had recently put in a request to transfer to a different department, but was placed on an employee improvement plan, a step that can lead to termination if performance isn't improved

    This reminds me of similar stories reported at Amazon Japan: http://toyokeizai.net/articles...

    With these and that old google++ rant about Amazon/Bezos by Steve Yegge, it is hard to not to draw generalizations about Amazon's work culture. I know people that work there (just acquaintances), and they seem to like it. But shit, all of these combined do not paint a nice picture.

  46. Comment removed by account_deleted · · Score: 1

    Comment removed based on user account deletion

  47. EIP = You're fired!! by MoarSauce123 · · Score: 1

    I work and worked in places where they had EIPs and despite quite many proceeding through such "plan" not a single employee came out with any improvement aside from a three month grace period for looking for a new job. The managers really do not have a plan because they already decided to plan differently. Amazon is surely not the only place that consider employees "human capital" that is freely replaceable.

  48. One data point by sjbe · · Score: 1

    Unemployed people are more likely to commit suicide, for instance. And how many people choose to do it at work in an explicit attempt to make a statement against their employers?

    Those people are accounted for in the actuarial tables. Unless there was something truly exceptional about this specific circumstance that you can point to (does not seem to be the case here) or if you have data indicating that there is a statistically higher than expected suicide rate among Amazon workers then it doesn't say anything about working conditions at Amazon. I'm not saying it isn't a tragedy (it very much is) but there is no evidence that this was an event outside the expected rate of normal either.

    The article seems to imply that Amazon is somehow at fault here but there is no evidence presented to support that. It's a single data point with no evidence presented to explain why we should believe it was something other than what we should expect looking at actuarial tables.

  49. Show me the data by sjbe · · Score: 1

    Except that Amazon does not employ people at random, especially at their HQ.

    Unless you have evidence that there is a higher than average suicide rate among Amazon workers then that is a meaningless statement. A single data point does not make a trend nor does it say anything useful about working conditions at Amazon, good or bad. Unless you can point to something that makes this truly an exceptional case then statistically speaking it is just the expected outcome among a large population.

  50. Management Speak by DarthVain · · Score: 1

    Similar protocol recently introduced where I work. Done under the auspices of Employee Health and Well being. However like management terms re-organization and transformation being largely just another way to say layoffs it isn't really want it purports to be. Basically sets attendance standards, to which if not met involves escalation and eventual grounds for termination. Two of the hallmarks that don't make a lot of sense is that firstly the values set out are less than those that are entitled within contract which is pretty sketchy. Secondly unlike the title it basically encourages/influences/pressures employees to come to work sick or potentially face censure. Supposedly one of the "helpful" questions they ask should you get pulled before management is "What can we do to help your attendance", by which I would think the obvious answer would be to stop forcing/promoting sick people to go to work getting more people sick in an endless spiral of sickness, reprisals, and low moral. Anyway I'm sure someone in HR management thought this was a fantastic idea... All it really does is give management more flexibility in who they can fire because it will be pretty hard for anyone not to fall into the program. The reason is unimportant, if you get hit by a car, and clearly you have a broken leg, and you miss more than X days, it doesn't matter, you're in the program. I expect this will last until some overzealous manager decides to use it to get rid of someone they don't like without thinking too much, where regardless of the new policy, if it is in breach of actual contract or employee law and gets sued into oblivion for wrongful dismissal. However before that happens it is going to cause a lot of harm in additional employee stress, low moral, etc... I get that a small number of employees will always try to take advantage of a system, however this pretty much targets everyone and it is pretty transparent that it exists as nothing more than a management tool to get rid of people they just don't like. Part of the reason I find it most insulting is that it is so thinly veiled, and for the most part the employees are highly educated, does management think that everyone doesn't easily see though all this, or is it they simply don't care. For extra douchebaggery it seems they also implemented it retroactively, meaning your attendance levels prior to the programs existence or your knowledge of said program count towards your inclusion, though some I believe are pushing back on that point. As for performance. I think it will have opposite to intended result. Just prior to hearing about all this I can recall thinking I need to do more to be as effective as possible, now I could care less. So I'm sure some HR boffin can point to some attendance statistics and sickly smile and say "see it's working, look how how effective we are, that's a 10% improvement", where in reality you just have more employee attendance not productivity.

  51. just coming back to wonder by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    When the Chinese factory workers were being prevented from doing this by NETS AROUND THE BUILDINGS, it was world-wide news. When a white collar person does same in the US, the only place I see it is here on slashdot. Why?

  52. Not enough money in the world... by w1z4rd · · Score: 1

    ... that could convince me to compromise my life enough to work at Amazon. Worst company I know to work at. They take exploitation to new levels.

    1. Re:Not enough money in the world... by iggymanz · · Score: 1

      nope, there are business in small towns all over that exploit people in even worse ways because they have no alternative place to work.