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  1. This just in... on Military Personnel Weigh In On Being Taliban In Medal of Honor · · Score: 1

    Space Ship Pilots Weigh In On Playing As Space Rocks In Asteroids Deluxe II RPG: The Revenge of the Asteroids! It's just as relevant, no, MORE relevant!

  2. Re:Imagine that. on Medieval Copy Protection · · Score: 3, Interesting

    Say it ain't so! :(

    Actually, most good books [sic] in the middle ages were chained to the library shelves, curse or no. It wasn't until the invention of the printing press that books became "unchained" and eventually so ubiquitous that hardcovers became "special" and paperbacks were the order of the day. Personally, just like the music and films I give away to my friends and family, I like to lend out books to interested peoples. Even printed information wants to be free. Bringth me your 100GB+ drive, good sir, and I'll shall layeth upon thine disk drive with mighty hands and bequeath to thee an generous sum of iPod movies and MP3s!!1! Go forth, verily and spread thy good datas, friend! Purchase some, share more.

  3. You're going down Atari & Namco! on NCsoft Sued For Making Lineage II 'Too Addictive' · · Score: 2, Insightful

    I'm putting Atari on notice for Asteroids Deluxe and Namco for Xevious! I've wasted far too many hours of my younger days on those two games and I want my quarters back! Waaaaah!!1!

    Plus, we should blow up the moon. Thank you.

  4. Humans get it too on Zombie Ants and Killer Fungus · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    Ever wondered why ignorANT people latch onto a conspiracy theory with no merit or plausibility? Same thing, only different; Conspiracy Virus. Get the cure, read a book!

  5. Re:Easy Solution! on Google's CEO Warns Kids Will Have to Change Names to Escape "Cyber Past" · · Score: 1

    Please subscribe me to your awesome newsletter! My name is Craig Shergold. Also, send me a card! Greeting or business or memory. Thank you. I'm dying of some strange disease, so make it quick!

  6. And now... on Icelandic Company Designs Human Pylons · · Score: 0

    Would you like to buy some Icelandic Honey Pylons? Oh please! We're bally cold and there's nothing but bloody fish to eat!

  7. Not anit-fan unfriendly! on Discovery Threatens Fan Site It Also Promotes · · Score: 1

    I was going to have a cracking good fan-site for the upcoming LEGO: The Deadliest Catch Years 1 & 2 video game, but screw that!

  8. Re:TrueCrypt? on Web-Based Private File Storage? · · Score: 1

    Yes, but it's still THEIR computer. Just use ssl/gmail for your personal crap, and PGP/encrypt your stupid personal thought from people who are most interested in them. Which is the crux of the biscuit; people who really care will circumvent your encryption anyway. and get at that juicy data you have there. Just write it in a journal, then burn it. What is so special about our private thoughts that make us write them down in case we forget them later? Just think more! I'm going to lunch now. Don't need to jot that in my journal. This is my frickin' journal. Slashcomm!

  9. Re:Site down already? on AmigaOS Twenty-Five Years of Check-Ins Visualized · · Score: 1

    It looks just like some bouncy, checkered balls to me. ?

  10. Re:He saves the human race time and time again . . on Churchill Accused of Sealing UFO Files, Fearing Public Panic · · Score: 1

    No credit is needed. Just the knowledge of doing his favorite species a favour. Even though we do look exactly like Gallifreians. That, a sonic screwdriver, a stolen TARDIS Type 40, and some of the hottest assistants ever, who needs thanks? A oddly long scarf and a card would be nice though.

  11. Re:Wise on Dog Eats Man's Toe and Saves His Life · · Score: 1

    They say if you eat a mans toe you gain his strength.

    Wasn't that for stealing/cutting his hair? I'd say; Give a dog a toe and you feed him for a day. Teach a dog to hunt for toes and you feed him for a lifetime.

  12. Re:The first rule on playing against the house... on Justice Department Joins Fraud Lawsuit Against Oracle · · Score: 1

    Both are true! Oracle just needs to hire a couple of fancy-pants lobbyists, pay some $6000 "Influence Incentives", not(!) bribes, and they're all set. Bob's your uncle!

    Oracle was required to inform the GSA when commercial discounts improved and to offer those same discounts to government buyers

    WTF?! That's not good for Oracle's bottom line, they are not open source anymore, Uncle Sam! They are TRYING to turn a nice profit in this economic downturn for crapping out loud! I can understand how Larry would be offended by this statement at a time when he was trying to purchase the Golden State Warriors basketball team. How rude!

  13. Re:MS is nothing but a me-too on To Ballmer, Grabbing iPad's Market Is 'Job One Urgency' · · Score: 1

    Stop copying and innovate.

    Yeah! Stop copying and innovate.

    I don't like my first gen iTouch, so I never got an iPhone, and don't want the iPad, but what I WOULD like is an iPad-like device, with a carrying handle on the bezel(!), running Linux, and has a couple of hardware ports in addition to the wireless kit; hdmi, 10Genet, multi-pourpose flash-card slots. Not too much, just enough. Oh, and it must run Linux. That is all. Thank you. Enjoy your bagel. Mine was cheddar with Jalapeno bits and salmon spread!

  14. Oh noes! on How Cyber Spies Infiltrate Business Systems · · Score: 4, Insightful

    The packets are coming from INSIDE YOUR NETWORK!!1! GET OUT FAST!!1!

    Seriously, just fire up nmap and start scanning your internal work networks and some key systems. If the security and network admins don't show up in your cube within 30 minutes, you might have a problem that no amount of products from CA/Symantec could ever hope to solve. Yet, they WILL sell them to you nonetheless.

    Knowledge beats paranoia
    Spock smashes Scissors and vaporizes Rock

    Your mileage may vary.

  15. Re:I Shouldn't Have to Jailbreak It in the 1st Pla on Jailbreaking iPhone Now Legal · · Score: 1

    Why do people think it's their God given right to whatever they want, whenever they want to do it?

    There's where you went off the mark. You're wrong about this in the context of our discussion; I purchased the iTouch and I want to jailbreak it with or without Apple's permission, and I wish to do so in a manner that makes sense for my use of the product, but not for the majority of people who own said product, and without violating any laws; my iTouch wants to run nmap and other network security apps. So, your statement above, as it applies to me, is wrong and uninformed.

    It *IS* my right to use any product in anyway I please. End of story. = Period.

    If I purchase a hammer, then weld a nail to the tip... you see where I'm going?

    Wrong again. Here's where I'm going; I wish to use this new device as a method to aerate my lawn rather than a $26 dedicated aerator, so I just made one with a $5 hammer and a 5 cent nail. Same thing with the iTouch/iPhone/iPod; I purchased it and I will use it as I please, whether to aerate my lawn or drive in a nail or look up something on the InterTubes. Apple can bitch all they want, but what I do with their devices after purchase is my own business, not theirs. So, please get a clue before you write a bunch of nonsense. You sound like a Luddite. The game is changing and Apple looks foolish, just like Nintendo, for blocking legitimate uses of their products in the name of scraping out a few extra bucks at the inconvenience of their "customers."

  16. Re:interesting question: on BSOD Issues On Deepwater Horizon · · Score: 1

    Brown!

    For those keeping score, here are the Deepwater Horizon color-coded threat warning levels:
    GREEN == A-OKAY, have a nice day.
    BLUE/BSOD == Lunchtime!
    AMBER == Check rig, abort, retry, ignore.
    RED == Begin cover-up procedures. Make sure you've already had lunch.
    BROWN == OH SHIT! Get off the fucking rig!!!1!!
    BLACK == No such alert; The Simpsons already did this one!

  17. Re:Momma dont take my kodachrome away on Last Roll of Kodachrome Processed · · Score: 1

    For you Simpson fans out there; The very last shot is of Steve McCurry picking up his photos at Dwayne's.

  18. Re:You can have my beer... on The World's Strongest, Most Expensive Beer Served Inside a Squirrel · · Score: 1

    Done! Plus, there's something special to snack on with the SquirrelBrau:

    http://www.1beefjerky.com/squirrel-jerky.htm

  19. Re:So little forest on NASA Creates First Global Forest Map Using Lasers · · Score: 2, Interesting

    Any scorched trees in your neck of the woods? Plus, you get the awesome benefit of forest therapy:

    http://search.japantimes.co.jp/cgi-bin/nn20080502f1.html

  20. Coincidence? on Facebook Wants Ownership Case Thrown Out · · Score: -1, Troll

    full of 'things that don't make sense'

    The contract or farcebook itself? YOU MAKE THE CALL!!1! I count 500 million things on FB that don't make sense and counting! Just 5.5B users to sign up, and we'll have a wicked-big party and all friend each other and likes will be passed around as if to simulate something that get's passed around. It'll be fun. Friend me, Saddo!

  21. Re:Obvious next step on Attackers Using Social Networks For Botnet Control · · Score: 3, Interesting

    I would love to mod this "Like", but I fear that will launch an attach from BotVille. Speaking of which, why not just use a malware metaphor, say farming, build up a fake business around that as a "game". Then let thousands of stupid people who like shitty "games" play it to control and command their warez-botz-thingyz? Ooops, too late!

  22. Re:Very sad to witness this on OpenSolaris Governing Board Closing Shop? · · Score: 1

    You must not get near Unix or Linux much then, because they ALL look like that at the command line, even the latest versions not coded in the '90s. Still, good for you for putting down the mouse for two minutes and getting into some REAL computing. As a very long time Solaris Admin (22 years +, kids) I am not surprised at how Oracle completely ignores the open source community in favor of more $$. Look how they are fumbling SPARC, Java, MySQL, and now Open Solaris. In case you're not aware, which is what it seems here, Open Solaris is/was where all the latest crap is/was built. It was a very stable "testbed" for Solaris 11, now it's about to get forked, but anything interesting will never make it back into the main line code for Oracle's Solaris 10 updates. It is sad, but I saw this coming, which is why I'm all about Linux and VMWare now. I've done everything with Solaris I need to do; if you've not used the Zones then you've missed out on a very well designed, free, virtual environment that will become a fond memory now. So, good for Oracle! Go make lots of money with your expensive, proprietary products. I've seen OAS and Oracle DB. I support open source in the enterprise, and I push open source into the enterprise. Solaris bought my house, but Linux/VMWare is going to buy the next one. So long, and thanks for all the fish, Solaris!

  23. Re:So BP is SAVING crustaceans? on Antidepressants In the Water Are Making Shrimp Suicidal · · Score: 3, Funny

    That's not oil, that's Texas Tea Sauce! BTW, how do the new fearless-shrimp taste anyway? Would they now be attracted to cocktail sauce as well? We need an expensive study here!

  24. Re:Nothing new on RIAA Accounting — How Labels Avoid Paying Musicians · · Score: 1

    Unfortunately that line of revenue is teaming with parasites as well. $50+ for a show?! Forget it. How much will the artist (not !Prince, what the hell is his unicode symbol name anyway!?) get after TicketBastards & their ilk charge me their $6 ticket handling fee, $8 convenience fee, $5 online ordering fee, $20 for parking, $8 for a suspicious hot dog at the event, $25 for a T-shirt, etc, etc, etc. I'll wait and download the bootlegs, thank you. Oh, and get off my lawn!

  25. Two words: CyberMonkey ArmyCorps! on White House Tackling the Economics of Cybersecurity · · Score: 1

    Why are we still trying to do this job with inefficient humans! We just need one good CyberMonkey Officer to train the rest of the Corps, and viola! Peace through superior MonkeyPower!