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User: ozbird

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Comments · 1,546

  1. Re:The Rubber sheet analogy is WRONG!!! on Giant Sheets Of Dark Matter Detected · · Score: 1

    Scientists never get invited to pool parties...

    It must be their rubber fetish.

  2. Re:Censorship Is Never Necessary on Australian Internet Filter Enters Trial Phase · · Score: 1

    In both cases, it wasn't an easy sell to the majority of voters (who could care less), but to get Senate support from an independent (Harridine) or religious fringe (Family First) members that held/hold the balance of power.

    With any luck the new filter proposal will suffer the obvious fate of the last one: doesn't work, unwanted, pisses off voters, and the (currently silent) majority gets listened too instead of the vocal minority and they back off on such exercises in futility.

    I voted for a "Clever Country" - not a "Nanny State".

  3. Re:A different analysis on Do Gamers Enjoy Dying in First-Person-Shooters? · · Score: 1

    Would they be attempting draw the same conclusions if it was called "5 minute time-out", which is what it has more in common with real life?

    Do you mean "Counter-Strike"? No respawns suck.

  4. Re:US Patent 7003500 on Apple, Starbucks Sued Over Music Gift Cards · · Score: 2, Funny

    And kudos to the US for using a simple sequentially-numbered system for the patents instead of an indecipherable code involving numbers, letters, and probably hyphens in between every few of those other symbols.

    Maybe if they had used an indecipherable code, there wouldn't be so many bogus US patents.

    Patent Troll 1: I wonder if anyone has patented "watching grass grow on the Internet" yet?
    Patent Troll 2: Let's see: Patent No. 1337-RTFM-OMGWTFBBQ discusses growing plants ...
    Patent Troll 1: Whoa, too much for me. How about we sell penis-enlargement pills instead?

  5. Re:Will they make it? on Is AMD Dead Yet? · · Score: 1

    Of course, since Nvidia have just launched the 9600GT, we may presume there's a 9800GT on the way soon that'll blow both of them away

    The the 9600GT is based on the G92 core - the same as later versions of the 8800 (e.g. 512MB.) The renumbering is most likely to distance itself from the 8600, which was rather poorly received (unlike its 8800 brother.)

    Why nVidia didn't renumber the newer G92-based 8800 cards as 8900 or 9800, or at least give it a different suffix (GTI?) is beyond me. Keeping the same name confuses consumers, who will probably think that the 640MB version is "better" than the 512MB version when quite the opposite is true.

  6. Re:Crashes will happen... on Military Grounds Stealth Bomber Fleet · · Score: 1

    Otherwise we would still be using artificial limbs using wood and hooks instead of carbon fiber structures, servo motors and computers for our handicapped.

    Avast with yer "carbon fiber" talk - wooden legs and hooks be good enough to beat ninjas!

  7. Re:It's normal on Vista SP1 Is Even Less Compatible · · Score: 1

    Microsoft: Hello [insert AV vendor here]. Would you like your users to have to upgrade to the latest version of your product for Vista SP1?
    AV vendor: Yes please - we need the revenue.
    Microsoft: Done - we'll add you to the "disabled with approval" list.
    AV vendor: Thanks Microsoft! [evil laugh]

  8. Re:This might be a dumb question... on IBM Leaks Details on New Mainframe · · Score: 5, Funny

    I believe a thousand megatonnes is then commonly called a "shiteload" or, in the US, a "fuckload".

    A U.S. fuckload is a thousand megatons. A thousand megatonnes is a metric fuckload.

  9. Re:Lawsuits? on Optimus Keyboard Starts Shipping · · Score: 1

    I hate to break this to you and the rest of the illiterates, but Rome and Latin really existed.

    Yeah, but what have the Romans ever done for us (apart from the sanitation, the medicine, education, wine, public order, irrigation, roads, a fresh water system, and public health)?

  10. Re:I'm disappointed that there's no UK team on First 10 Teams in $30M Google Lunar X Prize Announced · · Score: 2, Funny

    The UK team are too busy doing Top Gear stunts.

  11. Re:Why not save $40 billion then? on Gates Explains Microsoft's Need for Yahoo · · Score: 1

    It takes time to develop those great ideas and get a bunch of customers on board.

    Only if they stay on board. How many of them will jump ship once Microsoft grabs the tiller and heads for the iceberg-laden Windows ocean?

  12. Re:You know what would be even better? on Dell Set to Introduce AMD's Triple-core Phenom CPU · · Score: 2, Funny
    To paraphrase:

    Nigel Tufnel: The numbers all go to three. Look, right across the board, three, three, three and...
    Marty DiBergi: Oh, I see. And most cores go up to two?
    Nigel Tufnel: Exactly.
    Marty DiBergi: Does that mean it's better? Is it any better?
    Nigel Tufnel: Well, it's one better, isn't it? It's not two. You see, most blokes, you know, will be playing at two. You're on two here, all the way up, all the way up, all the way up, you're on two on your computer. Where can you go from there? Where?
    Marty DiBergi: I don't know.
    Nigel Tufnel: Nowhere. Exactly. What we do is, if we need that extra push over the cliff, you know what we do?
    Marty DiBergi: Put it up to three.
    Nigel Tufnel: Three. Exactly. One better.
    Marty DiBergi: Why don't you just make two better and make two be the top number and make that a little better?
    Nigel Tufnel: [pause] These go to three.
  13. Re: Magnifying glasses on U of MI Produces Strongest Laser Ever · · Score: 2, Funny

    "If you could hold a giant magnifying glass in space and focus all the sunlight shining toward Earth onto one grain of sand, that concentrated ray would approach the intensity of a new laser beam made in a University of Michigan laboratory ..."

    Please, won't someone think of the ants?!

  14. Re:Heh. on UK Commissioner Seeks To Ban Ultrasonic Anti-Teen Device · · Score: 1

    For all we know the real tone may sound like Mozart.

    Funny you should mention that. Some train stations, shopping centres etc. in Australia play classical music through their PA systems to discourage youths from loitering. It seems to work without annoying anyone else - unless they play "Greensleeves".

  15. Re:All I read was... on Microsoft Battles Vista Perception With Prizes · · Score: 2, Funny

    You forgot one:

    Is far too big to fit on you.

  16. Re:c't Offline Update on Windows XP Update Library On a CD · · Score: 1

    I used this to go one better: Windows XP + SP2 + (most) post-SP2 patches, slipstreamed. When I was last forced to rebuild XP, it worked like a charm.

  17. Re:Soo ... on Tolkien Trust Sues New Line, May Kill "Hobbit" · · Score: 1

    Life + (X number of years) in the slammer would be a good way to remind studio execs not to be arseholes.

  18. Re:Missing tag. on Birds Give a Lesson to Plane Designers · · Score: 1

    The fact that one maneuvers faster than the other, it's just... inexplicable.

    I believe the meme you are looking for is: "inconceivable".

  19. Re:PBKAC on Antivirus Inventor Says Security Pros Are Wasting Time · · Score: 2, Insightful

    I wouldn't need to keep my password on a Post-It note if you IT security guys didn't make me change it every two weeks!

    There, fixed it for you - IT guys get pissed off with frequent demands to change their password, too.

  20. Re:they dress up like bears on Does Anonymity In Virtual Worlds Breed Terrorism? · · Score: 1

    Geez, not all furries are terrorists.

    If you're serious about targeting terrorists, why not declare a War on Beards?

  21. Re:"The observatory will hunt for alien planets... on Robotic Telescope Installed on Antarctica Plateau · · Score: 1

    Wouldn't any planet not our own be an alien planet?

    Only if it has aliens on it.

  22. Re:Blashphemy ! on 111 Years Ago, Indiana Almost Legislated Pi · · Score: 1

    Pah - reductionists. 3.141592654 should be enough for anyone.

  23. Re: Could We Find a Door To A Parallel Universe? on Could We Find a Door To A Parallel Universe? · · Score: 1
    Yes.

    "In those days spirits were brave, the stakes were high, men were REAL men, women were REAL women, and small furry creatures from Alpha Centauri were REAL small furry creatures from Alpha Centauri." - HHGTTG
  24. Re:less civilized? on Pre-20th Century Gadgetery · · Score: 1

    Less civilized: did not wear digital watches.

  25. Re:Both sides of the atlantic? on India and US to Cooperate in Space Exploration · · Score: 1

    Indeed. I believe the correct relational term is "both sides of the call center".