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User: swschrad

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  1. the FBI has discovered "D'OH!" on FBI Warns of Sweeping Global Threat To US Cybersecurity · · Score: 1

    or maybe "duh."

    enemies who want to get you in the weak points. who woulda thought it?

    any bilged-out 2nd lieutanant would appear to be smarter than the head of cyber security in this regard, since the military academies exist to study this stuff. and the first place to start is not to put critical systems on the web, maybe, you think?

    this fella probably wants to go back to tubes to avoid EMP.

  2. I thought last night's debates were AI. on New Contestants On the Turing Test · · Score: 0, Offtopic

    certainly nothing original or spontaneous. probably the most important application of AI yet, scaring voters of all stripes ;)

  3. I see a Clippy, and a doggie, and a Bob... on Microsoft To Release Cloud-Oriented Windows OS · · Score: 1

    but are those my financial records on that torrent server?

  4. Hans Reiser comes to mind on Becoming a Famous Programmer · · Score: 1

    potentially reduced the number of female programmers by one. ended up with a divide-by-zero-brains error and is chained in the sandbox.

  5. nonsense. ONLY I have the perfect mileage tool. on Simple Device Claimed To Boost Fuel Efficiency By Up To 20% · · Score: 1

    get two raw eggs and some duct tape.

    tape a raw egg to the top of the gas pedal, and one to the top of the brake pedal.

    now drive so you don't break the eggs.

    guaranteed fuel savings. and this is the ONLY device that will work.

  6. woo, I won! on Popup Study Confirms Most Users Are Idiots · · Score: 1

    bought a mac.

  7. don't worry, it won't be used this administration. on Homeland Security Department Testing "Pre-Crime" Detector · · Score: 1

    reason: "ding-ding-ding-ding-ding!"

    "And THAT, Mr. President, is how it works. you can see its accuracy."

    "stop pointing that THING at me!"

  8. Al Quaida IT, Designed by Microsoft on Microsoft Innovates Tent Data Centers · · Score: 1

    now let 'em try and sell it.

  9. the Mark of Desperation! on Ray Beckerman Sued By the RIAA · · Score: 1

    if employees of the RIAA step outside and it's raining, they immediately think of suing God.

    some people, you say "hi" to them, they say "howdy." some folks say "F# off." RIAA workers say, "you bastard pirate, I'm taking you to court!"

    the world will not be in its right orbit, the climate will continue to deteriorate, yea, even Wacko bin Looney will plot and cackle in his Secret Location, as long as the RIAA and its evil tradesmen continue to run rampant across the legal system.

    the center of all the evil is the RIAA

  10. ooh, I know! a spare box of Higgs bosons! on Hubble Finds Unidentified Object In Space · · Score: 1

    check the mailing label, we might find the rest of the dark matter. thanks, Hubble scientists!

  11. timely as the Saturday headlines... on Judge Rules Defense Can Get DUI Machine Source Code · · Score: 1

    CMI and Minnesota have reached an agreement to make the source code availiable. there is not much else in the snoozepaper article, buried inside the local section today.

    frankly, I would expect some enterprising attorney to require a "normal" sample showing correct calibration for his cases, and see whether the state goes to blood tests for prosecutions.

    it is an option for either law enforcement or the suspect to take a blood alcohol test in MN. it's a hospital trip, and that's going to wreck the cop's night if he's still a ticket book behind the "oh, no, we don't require that" quota.

  12. prior art exists on Compressor-Free Refrigerator On the Way · · Score: 1

    albert einstein and leo szilard had one of these patented in the 20s, somebody in germany made them for a while. very, very old news indeed.

  13. no, folks, this is really simple. on Adam Savage Revises Claim of Lawyer-Bullying On RFID Show · · Score: 1

    it's just like newsies on a conference call. whatever they hear is fair game. if a bunch of lawyers from the ivory tower, not the courtroom, want to dot Is and cross Ts on the call, they have released information without privilege.

    anybody can compromise information and put it into the public arena. but once it's out, don't try and get it back. you've already used the first amendment to publish, and there is no constitutional "oops, be a good boy" clause.

    air the show.

  14. commiecast doesn't get the law on Comcast Appeals FCC's Net Neutrality Ruling · · Score: 1, Interesting

    they have gone past the 1949 definition of a cable company as a protected common carrier... they originate material, aka internet, guide channels, phone service, and are now modifying that material that traverses their system. they are therefore subject to regulation. if they don't want regulation, go back to being a coax that brings other folks' TV signals into homes, and do nothing else.

  15. yes, at the "C" level on Should Companies Share Criminal Blame In ID Theft? · · Score: 1

    CEO, CFO, CTO, doesn't matter to me... but if a company officer is not responsible, the underlings can whine about not being able to implement best practices due to (budget, boogeyman, idiot cousin got the job, whatever you need, pick one) then it's not going to be taken seriously.

  16. ehh, anybody looks like a star next to a black hol on Scientists Solve Mystery of Star Formation Near Black Holes · · Score: 1

    but thanks for your support.

  17. uh, no, Diebold just decertified the machines. on Diebold Admits Ohio Machines May Lose Votes · · Score: 1

    the only legal solution in Ohio is put 'em all in a closet and use paper ballots. only. legal. solution. as in "nothing else."

    now, how are those slot machines looking as an investment, hmmmm?

  18. not until they support mac 10.3.9, I won't. on Firefox To Get a Nag Screen For Upgrades · · Score: 2, Insightful

    so, let's see here now. at this point, it looks like my system is sunset, no more upgrades on anything. been nice knowing you, 'zilla, don't write.

  19. Vista, the Data Nazi on Jerry Seinfeld Will Plug Vista · · Score: 1

    "no files forrrrr YOU!"

  20. the IOC now owns Tibetan monk protests? hah! on YouTube Yanks Free Tibet Video After IOC Pressure · · Score: 1

    if there are no Five Linked Rings, or the words approximating Old, Limp Pigs used, there is no violation

  21. buncha crap, the danger was spy equipment on Why Shoot Down a Satellite? Analyzing an Analysis · · Score: 1

    the amount of hydrazine in there would have made a good substitute for a little suitcase neutron bomb. say, a half square mile or so.

    no, Uncle just didn't want his special chips on eBay.

  22. prior art exists on Researchers Pave Way For Compressor-Free Refrigeration · · Score: 1

    sounds like the Szilard/Einstein refrigerator of the 20s, which used a ferrous-based refrigerant moved with magnets.

  23. MS needs a revered spokesman. clippy! on Microsoft Tries a New Ad Agency · · Score: 1

    let clippy deliver all their advertising messages. "hey, the clip has a high Q score. the chair-throwing fatty doesn't. pitch it."

  24. hmmm... let's see... "ryanair"... scratched off. on Airline Cancels All Flights Booked Through Third-Party Systems · · Score: 1

    yep, they don't want business, they don't get business.

  25. should have a different acronym on Google Earth Used To Predict Electrical Problems · · Score: 1

    I might suggest Managing Energy Resources Dynamically on Earth (MERDE,) because as soon as somebody starts relying on that system, we're going to be deep in it.