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User: Big_Ass_Spork

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Comments · 574

  1. Re:fp fp fp on The Dangers of Being A Microbiologist · · Score: -1

    er, It is early Sunday...

    Fucking drunk ass fingers! Type, type I tell you!!

  2. Re:fp fp fp on The Dangers of Being A Microbiologist · · Score: -1

    I is early Sunday, beeaattch!!!

    --
    BAS

    Si señor! Si señor!
    -Sprite commercial with freaky double jointed dude.

  3. IAWTP on The Dangers of Being A Microbiologist · · Score: -1

    I surely do. Psyonic your website (er, page...) really does suck.

    1234567890zxcvbnm, kudos on your use of the word fucktard! Somewhere Profane Motherfucker has an unexplaned sence of happiness.

  4. Re:first jesus post on The Dangers of Being A Microbiologist · · Score: -1

    Here here! Chuy died not for me. I sin on my own behalf and for my own enjoyment. When I die, I die for my own sins. My death will be one of permanence and mourned by few.

    --
    BAS

    Bring in that floating fat man, the baron!
    -The Emporer

  5. Wait! You mean... on Home Made Alarm Systems? · · Score: -1

    there's more then one way to swallow sperm? I am interested in learning more (to educate my wife). Please send me your newsletter. Thanks in advance

    --
    BAS

  6. Fucking crack smoking moderators!! on Is Starband's Satellite Internet Service Palatable? · · Score: -1

    This is soooo on topic! If the guy can fix his phone line speed issue, then he does not need Starband, which many posters above say sucks...

  7. IAWTP on Making an Independent Web Site? · · Score: -1

    Yes, I surely do.

  8. Re:You know what's not worth the time? on Google Ad-words Poetry Project · · Score: -1

    I concur. I have been reading Star Trek S.C.E. e-books on my Palm m130. Books do not suffer from lack of explosions. The only spirituallity mentioned so far was that a captain's wife on earth was a rabbi. Then back to kicking cosmic ass.

    Keep up the good work VSA, make the masses understand!

  9. *Deth is Dying!!! on Google Ad-words Poetry Project · · Score: -1
    It is now official - Netcraft has confirmed: Megadeth is dying

    Yet another crippling bombshell hit the beleaguered Megadeth community when recently IDC confirmed that Megadeth accounts for less than a fraction of 1 percent of all music. Coming on the heels of the latest Netcraft survey which plainly states that Megadeth has lost more market share, this news serves to reinforce what we've known all along. Megadeth is collapsing in complete disarray, as further exemplified by failing dead last in the recent heavy metal comprehensive music test.

    You don't need to be a Kreskin to predict Megadeth's future. The hand writing is on the wall: Megadeth faces a bleak future. In fact there won't be any future at all for Megadeth because Megadeth is dying. Things are looking very bad for Megadeth. As many of us are already aware, Megadeth continues to lose market share. Red ink flows like a river of blood. Dave Mustane is the most endangered of them all, having lost 93% of his core following.

    Let's keep to the facts and look at the numbers.

    Megadeth leader Dave states that there are 7000 users of David Ellefson. How many users of Al Pitrelli are there? Let's see. The number of David Ellefson versus Al Pitrelli posts on Usenet is roughly in ratio of 5 to 1. Therefore there are about 7000/5 = 1400 Al Pitrelli users. Jimmy DeGrasso posts on Usenet are about half of the volume of Al Pitrelli posts. Therefore there are about 700 users of Jimmy DeGrasso. A recent article put Dave Mustane at about 80 percent of the Megadeth market. Therefore there are (7000+1400+700)*4 = 36400 Dave Mustane users. This is consistent with the number of Dave Mustane Usenet posts.

    Due to the troubles of Walnut Creek, abysmal sales and so on, Dave Mustane went out of business and was taken over by *NSync who sell another troubled genre. Now *NSync is also dead, its corpse turned over to yet another charnel house.

    All major surveys show that Megadeth has steadily declined in market share. Megadeth is very sick and its long term survival prospects are quite dim. If Megadeth is to survive at all it will be among genre hobbyist dabblers. Megadeth continues to decay. Nothing short of a miracle could save it at this point in time. For all practical purposes, Megadeth is dead.

    Megadeth is dying

  10. *Deth is Dying!!! on Amazon & Used Books II: Bezos Strikes Back · · Score: -1
    It is now official - Netcraft has confirmed: Megadeth is dying

    Yet another crippling bombshell hit the beleaguered Megadeth community when recently IDC confirmed that Megadeth accounts for less than a fraction of 1 percent of all music. Coming on the heels of the latest Netcraft survey which plainly states that Megadeth has lost more market share, this news serves to reinforce what we've known all along. Megadeth is collapsing in complete disarray, as further exemplified by failing dead last in the recent heavy metal comprehensive music test.

    You don't need to be a Kreskin to predict Megadeth's future. The hand writing is on the wall: Megadeth faces a bleak future. In fact there won't be any future at all for Megadeth because Megadeth is dying. Things are looking very bad for Megadeth. As many of us are already aware, Megadeth continues to lose market share. Red ink flows like a river of blood. Dave Mustane is the most endangered of them all, having lost 93% of his core following.

    Let's keep to the facts and look at the numbers.

    Megadeth leader Dave states that there are 7000 users of David Ellefson. How many users of Al Pitrelli are there? Let's see. The number of David Ellefson versus Al Pitrelli posts on Usenet is roughly in ratio of 5 to 1. Therefore there are about 7000/5 = 1400 Al Pitrelli users. Jimmy DeGrasso posts on Usenet are about half of the volume of Al Pitrelli posts. Therefore there are about 700 users of Jimmy DeGrasso. A recent article put Dave Mustane at about 80 percent of the Megadeth market. Therefore there are (7000+1400+700)*4 = 36400 Dave Mustane users. This is consistent with the number of Dave Mustane Usenet posts.

    Due to the troubles of Walnut Creek, abysmal sales and so on, Dave Mustane went out of business and was taken over by *NSync who sell another troubled genre. Now *NSync is also dead, its corpse turned over to yet another charnel house.

    All major surveys show that Megadeth has steadily declined in market share. Megadeth is very sick and its long term survival prospects are quite dim. If Megadeth is to survive at all it will be among genre hobbyist dabblers. Megadeth continues to decay. Nothing short of a miracle could save it at this point in time. For all practical purposes, Megadeth is dead.

    Megadeth is dying

  11. *Deth is Dying!!! on Flash and Open Source · · Score: -1
    It is now official - Netcraft has confirmed: Megadeth is dying

    Yet another crippling bombshell hit the beleaguered Megadeth community when recently IDC confirmed that Megadeth accounts for less than a fraction of 1 percent of all music. Coming on the heels of the latest Netcraft survey which plainly states that Megadeth has lost more market share, this news serves to reinforce what we've known all along. Megadeth is collapsing in complete disarray, as further exemplified by failing dead last in the recent heavy metal comprehensive music test.

    You don't need to be a Kreskin to predict Megadeth's future. The hand writing is on the wall: Megadeth faces a bleak future. In fact there won't be any future at all for Megadeth because Megadeth is dying. Things are looking very bad for Megadeth. As many of us are already aware, Megadeth continues to lose market share. Red ink flows like a river of blood. Dave Mustane is the most endangered of them all, having lost 93% of his core following.

    Let's keep to the facts and look at the numbers.

    Megadeth leader Dave states that there are 7000 users of David Ellefson. How many users of Al Pitrelli are there? Let's see. The number of David Ellefson versus Al Pitrelli posts on Usenet is roughly in ratio of 5 to 1. Therefore there are about 7000/5 = 1400 Al Pitrelli users. Jimmy DeGrasso posts on Usenet are about half of the volume of Al Pitrelli posts. Therefore there are about 700 users of Jimmy DeGrasso. A recent article put Dave Mustane at about 80 percent of the Megadeth market. Therefore there are (7000+1400+700)*4 = 36400 Dave Mustane users. This is consistent with the number of Dave Mustane Usenet posts.

    Due to the troubles of Walnut Creek, abysmal sales and so on, Dave Mustane went out of business and was taken over by *NSync who sell another troubled genre. Now *NSync is also dead, its corpse turned over to yet another charnel house.

    All major surveys show that Megadeth has steadily declined in market share. Megadeth is very sick and its long term survival prospects are quite dim. If Megadeth is to survive at all it will be among genre hobbyist dabblers. Megadeth continues to decay. Nothing short of a miracle could save it at this point in time. For all practical purposes, Megadeth is dead.

    Megadeth is dying

  12. Congrats on your FP... on A New Low for Web Advertisers: Pop-Up Downloads · · Score: -1

    [n/t]

  13. Re:In other news today... on Linus Retiring from Kernel Dev · · Score: -1

    Thank you for your truly insightfull cliff notes condensed versions of our troll favorites. I am interested in receiving your newsletter. Please continue to enlighten us.

    Thank you for your time on this matter.

    BAS

  14. IAWTP on Wil Wheaton to get new role on 'Enterprise' · · Score: -1

    I agree with this post.

  15. Re:I feel bad for important news issues today... on Rootkit Packaged for Debian · · Score: -1

    Has the Original Aids Monkey been notified?

  16. what's fucked up is... on Updated Slashdot Advertising Policy · · Score: -1

    This is not an Aprill Fools joke...

    It actually has been going on for some time here.

  17. I DO IT WRONG!!! on Do Programming Languages Affect Your Sexual Performance? · · Score: -1

    I do it wrong

    Laying here in the shadows of my room, I squint up at my love. My Ms. Portman. I
    am sore and tired after fucking her for eight solid hours. My chapped and aching
    dick is soaking in grits to relieve the pain. She gets on her knees and starts
    lapping the grits up out of the bowl. She places her beautiful hands on my penis
    and starts to lick the grits off my achy piece.

    Massaging my nutsack she....



    WAIT, I DO IT WRONG!!!!

    Yanking my dick out of her mouth I throw her to the ground and shove it in to
    her gaping freshly fisted ass. [goatse.cx]

    "OH BIG ASS SPORK!! Fuck my ass, fuck my ass good. DEEPER, my stallion, deeper!!
    Make a Beowulf cluster of sperm on my back!!"

    "Imagine a Beowulf cluster of this baby!"

    I DO IT WRONG!!!!



    I continue to hump her alabaster form. Glistening with beads of sweat, she bites
    her lip in delight as I tear her ass open with my engorged dick.



    "Queen Amidala!!" I shreik as I near climax.



    She looks up at me and screams, "You are so alive in me, unlike *BSD or VA
    Software!!! Fill me with seed!! Yes, Yes, Yess!!!!"



    "For me you are calling, hhhmmm?"



    "YODA?!? What the fuck, can't you see I am using the force here?"



    He savagely kicks my Natalie aside, he pulls out his large green penis and
    impales me...



    I DO IT WRONG!!


    All your sporkz are belong to the dead homiez!!

  18. Re:not really interested... on A Step Closer (Or Not) To Cable ISP Diversity · · Score: -1

    Great rebuttal of an AC flaming another AC AS AN AC AS AN AC.

  19. Re:First widening! on Selling Your Wireless Traffic to Passers-By · · Score: -1

    I have downloaded and installed Mozilla Win32 just for surfing /.

    It allows me to keep enjoying /. in the face of these hard times.

  20. For your continuing innovation... on Eric Raymond: Why Open Source will Rule · · Score: -1

    in the face of overwhelming communitiy hatred, I present you with the Evil Crapflood Of The Day Award. The ECOTDA will be given out on an iregular basis when it is appropriate, as it is in this case.

    Congratulations, Klerck, for you are a true innovator in the M$ sense (put that in there so some slashbot will mod this up). Keep the janitors on their toes, oh and, congrats on the FP as well.

  21. ACs in da hitzouse <-- WRONG!!! on Sony's R&D- Linux and PS3 · · Score: -1

    We who log in own the house. There are most definately no AC's in the hitzouse. Now log the fuck in, AC bitch.

    BTW, I claim this FP in the name of all logged in crapflodders.

  22. Die AC Bitch... on The State of Remote Desktops? · · Score: -1

    [n/t]

  23. Good work... on Conductive Concrete Offers Building Security · · Score: -1

    Dear sir,

    I wish to subscribe to your newsletter. I am very interested in electric concrete. Is there a proven business model associated with the selling of electric concrete? If so can I purchase some information on this? Thanks in advance for your time concerning this matter.

    BAS

  24. Ahh, so you are a rap fan... How 'bout 2Pac? on Spam Increases Make Things Tough For Companies · · Score: -1

    California Love!

    California, knows how to party. California, knows how to party... In the city of LA, In the city of good ole Watts, In the city, city of Compton, We keep it rockin'. we keep it rockin'...

    Dr. Dre: Now let me welcome everybody to the wild, wild west, A state that's untouchable like Elliot Ness. The track hits your eardrum like a slug to your chest. Pack a vest for your jimmy in the city of sex. We in that sunshine state with a bomb ass hemp beat, The state where ya never find a dancefloor empty, And pimps be on a mission for them greens. Lean mean money making machines, servin fiends. I've been in the game for ten years making rap tunes, Ever since honeys was wearing sassons. Now its '95 and they clock and watch me. Diamond's shining, Lookin' like I robbed Liberace. Its all good from Diego to the Bay. Your city is the bomb if your city making pay (uh) Throw up a finger if you feel the same way. Dre putting it down for Californi-yeah...

    California (california), knows how to party (knows how to party) California (west coast), know how to party... (That's right) In the city (city) of LA, city of LA... In the city of good old Watts, good old Watts... In the city, city of Compton (city of Compton)... We keep it rockin', (keep it rockin') We keep it rockin'...

    Yeah, yow make it shake, come on... Shake it, shake it baby. Shake, shake it, (shake it baby)
    Shake, shake it Mama. Shake it Cali.
    Shake it Cali... Shake, shake it baby...
    That's right! Shake, shake it baby. Shake, shake it Mama. Shake it Cali!

    TuPac: Out on bail, Fresh outta jail.
    California Dreamin', Soon as I step on the scene
    I'm hearin' hoochies screamin'. Fiendin' for money and alcohol - The life of a west-side playah. When cops die, its on ball. Only in Cali will we riot, not rally, so live and die.
    In LA where we gear Chucks, not Balley's.
    (Yeah, that's right... uh) Dressed in locs and khaki suits, and ride is what we do.
    Flossin', but have caution - we collide with other foo's... Famous because we throw jams - world wide. Let 'em recognize from Long Beach to Rosecrance. Bumpin' and grindin' like a slow jam, Its west-side, so you know the Row won't bow down to no man! Say what you say but give me that bomb beat from Dre... Let me serenade the streets of LA! From Oakland to Sack town... The Bay Area and back down... Cali is where they put their Mack down. Give me love!

    California (california) knows how to party (aint no doubt) California (do do do do) knows how to party. C'mon, baby... In the city (South Central) of LA... In the city of good old Watts,
    That's right... In the city, city of Compton,
    We keep it rockin', keep it rockin'. We keep it rockin'... Yeah, Yeah...

    Dr. Dre: Now make it shake... Ahhh...

    Shake, shake, shake it baby. Ahhh Shake, shake, shake it baby. Yeah... Shake, shake it Mama.
    Shake it Cali, Shake it Cali! Shake, Shake it baby, Shake it Cali! Shake, shake it... Ahhh
    Shake, shake it Mama. West coast! Shake it Cali...
    Ahhh! Yeah, ahhh... Ahhh

    Dr. Dre: Long Beach in the house, ahhh!

    Yeah Oaktown... Oakland definately in the house.
    Frisco, yeah, Frisco...

    TuPac: Eh, You know LA up in this...

    Pasadena, where you at?
    Yeah, Inglewood...
    Inglewood always up to no good.
    Even Hollywood tryin' to get a piece of that...
    Sacramento, Sacramento, where you at?
    Yeah...

    Throw it up y'all! Throw it up! Throw it up!
    I can't see ya...

    California Love...

    Let's show these foo's how we do it on this West-side...
    'Cause you and I know its the best side!

    Yeah, that's right...
    West coast, West coast...
    Ahhh! California love!
    California love, yeah...

    California knows how to party.... Yeah....

  25. Or maybe some grammy award winning blue grass? on Spam Increases Make Things Tough For Companies · · Score: -1

    Soggy Bottom Boys
    I Am A Man Of Constant Sorrow

    (chorus) In constant sorrow through his days

    I am a man of constant sorrow
    I've seen trouble all my day.
    I bid farewell to old Kentucky
    The place where I was born and raised.

    (chorus) The place where he was born and raised

    For six long years I've been in trouble
    No pleasures here on earth I found
    For in this world I'm bound to ramble
    I have no friends to help me now.

    (chorus) He has no friends to help him now

    It's fare thee well my old lover
    I never expect to see you again
    For I'm bound to ride that northern railroad
    Perhaps I'll die upon this train.

    (chorus) Perhaps he'll die upon this train.

    You can bury me in some deep valley
    For many years where I may lay
    Then you may learn to love another
    While I am sleeping in my grave.

    (chorus) While he is sleeping in his grave.

    Maybe your friends think I'm just a stranger
    My face you'll never see no more.
    But there is one promise that is given
    I'll meet you on God's golden shore.

    (chorus) He'll meet you on God's golden shore