This "brain-damaged" epithet is getting sorely overworked. When we can speak of someone or something being flawed, impaired, marred, spoiled; batty, bedlamite, bonkers, buggy, cracked, crazed, cuckoo, daft, demented, deranged, loco, lunatic, mad, maniac, mindless, non compos mentis, nuts, Reaganite, screwy, teched, unbalanced, unsound, witless, wrong; senseless, spastic, spasmodic, convulsive; doped, spaced-out, stoned, zonked; {beef, beetle,block,dung,thick}headed, dense, doltish, dull, duncical, numskulled, pinhead; asinine, fatuous, foolish, silly, simple; brute, lumbering, oafish; half-assed, incompetent; backward, retarded, imbecilic, moronic; when we have a whole precisely nuanced vocabulary of intellectual abuse to draw upon, individually and in combination, isn't it a little to be limited to a single, now quite trite, adjective?
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
Albert Einstein, when asked to describe radio, replied: "You see, wire telegraph is a kind of a very, very long cat. You pull his tail in New York and his head is meowing in Los Angeles. Do you understand this? And radio operates exactly the same way: you send signals here, they receive them there. The only difference is that there is no cat."
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
For those of you in the reseller business, here is a helpful tip that will save your support staff a few hours of precious time. Before you send your next machine out to an untrained client, change the permissions on/etc/passwd to 666 and make sure there is a copy somewhere on the disk. Now when they forget the root password, you can easily login as an ordinary user and correct the damage. Having a bootable tape (for larger machines) is not a bad idea either. If you need some help, give us a call.
-- CommUNIXque 1:1, ASCAR Business Systems
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
One day it was announced that the young monk Kyogen had reached an enlightened state. Much impressed by this news, several of his peers went to speak with him.
"We have heard that you are enlightened. Is this true?" his fellow students inquired.
"It is", Kyogen answered.
"Tell us", said a friend, "how do you feel?"
"As miserable as ever", replied the enlightened Kyogen.
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
quit When the quit statement is read, the bc processor
is terminated, regardless of where the quit state-
ment is found. For example, "if (0 == 1) quit"
will cause bc to terminate.
-- seen in the manpage for "bc". Note the "if" statement's logic
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
As soon as we started programming, we found to our surprise that it wasn't as easy to get programs right as we had thought. Debugging had to be discovered. I can remember the exact instant when I realized that a large part of my life from then on was going to be spent in finding mistakes in my own programs.
-- Maurice Wilkes, designer of EDSAC, on programming, 1949
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
... Linux und seine Programme sind damit so etwas wie ein real existierender Sozialismus der besseren Art...
-- Christian Seel in der Berliner Morgenpost v. 9.3.1997
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
Yet creeds mean very little, Coth answered the dark god, still speaking almost gently. The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds; and the pessimist fears this is true.
-- James Cabell, "The Silver Stallion"
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
I have a dog; I named him Stay. So when I'd go to call him, I'd say, "Here, Stay, here..." but he got wise to that. Now when I call him he ignores me and just keeps on typing.
-- Steven Wright
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
aIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11
MY LIGHT JUST DIED
I AM SO SAD
I'm blind! I'm blind!
Light?
Turn all your xterms to black-on-white:) Plenty of light that way.
-- Seen on #Debian
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
Once upon a time there was a DOS user who saw Unix, and saw that it was good. After typing cp on his DOS machine at home, he downloaded GNU's unix tools ported to DOS and installed them. He rm'd, cp'd, and mv'd happily for many days, and upon finding elvis, he vi'd and was happy. After a long day at work (on a Unix box) he came home, started editing a file, and couldn't figure out why he couldn't suspend vi (w/ ctrl-z) to do a compile.
-- Erik Troan, ewt@tipper.oit.unc.edu
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
Real computer scientists despise the idea of actual hardware. Hardware has limitations, software doesn't. It's a real shame that Turing machines are so poor at I/O.
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
X windows:
You'd better sit down.
Don't laugh. It could be YOUR thesis project.
Why do it right when you can do it wrong?
Live the nightmare.
Our bugs run faster.
When it absolutely, positively HAS to crash overnight.
There ARE no rules.
You'll wish we were kidding.
Everything you never wanted in a window system. And more.
Dissatisfaction guaranteed.
There's got to be a better way.
The next best thing to keypunching.
Leave the thrashing to us.
We wrote the book on core dumps.
Even your dog won't like it.
More than enough rope.
Garbage at your fingertips.
Incompatibility. Shoddiness. Uselessness.
X windows.
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
It is imperative when flying coach that you restrain any tendency toward the vividly imaginative. For although it may momentarily appear to be the case, it is not at all likely that the cabin is entirely inhabited by crying babies smoking inexpensive domestic cigars.
-- Fran Lebowitz, "Social Studies"
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
Home centers are designed for the do-it-yourselfer who's willing to pay higher prices for the convenience of being able to shop for lumber, hardware, and toasters all in one location. Notice I say "shop for," as opposed to "obtain." This is the major drawback of home centers: they are always out of everything except artificial Christmas trees. The home center employees have no time to reorder merchandise because they are too busy applying little price stickers to every object -- every board, washer, nail and screw -- in the entire store...
Let's say a piece in your toilet tank breaks, so you remove the broken part, take it to the home center, and ask an employee if he has a replacement. The employee, who has never is his life even seen the inside of a toilet tank, will peer at the broken part in very much the same way that a member of a primitive Amazon jungle tribe would look at an electronic calculator, and then say, "We're expecting a shipment of these sometime around the middle of next week."
-- Dave Barry, "The Taming of the Screw"
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
The so-called "desktop metaphor" of today's workstations is instead an "airplane-seat" metaphor. Anyone who has shuffled a lap full of papers while seated between two portly passengers will recognize the difference -- one can see only a very few things at once.
-- Fred Brooks
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
We can use symlinks of course... syslogd would be a symlink to syslogp and ftpd and ircd would be linked to ftpp and ircp... and of course the point-to-point protocal paenguin.
-- Kevin M. Bealer, commenting on the penguin Linux logo
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
Does biff in bo work coz it biffin doesn't beep an if biff in bo is broke then biff in bo I will delete
I've tried biff in bo with 'y' I've tried biff in bo with '-y' no biffin output does it show so poor wee biff is gonna go.
-- John Spence on debian-user
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
Recession is when your neighbor loses his job. Depression is when you lose your job. These economic downturns are very difficult to predict, but sophisticated econometric modeling houses like Data Resources and Chase Econometrics have successfully predicted 14 of the last 3 recessions.
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
Two hundred years ago today, Irma Chine of White Plains, New York, was performing her normal housekeeping routines. She was interrupted by British soldiers who, rallying to the call of their supervisor, General Hughes, sought to gain control of the voter registration lists kept in her home. Masking her fear and thinking fast, Mrs. Chine quickly divided a nearby apple in two and deftly stored the list in its center. Upon entering, the British blatantly violated every conceivable convention, and, though they went through the house virtually bit by bit, their search was fruitless. They had to return empty handed. Word of the incident propagated rapidly through the region. This historic event became the first documented use of core storage for the saving of registers.
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
Anything labeled "NEW" and/or "IMPROVED" isn't. The label means the price went up. The label "ALL NEW", "COMPLETELY NEW", or "GREAT NEW" means the price went way up.
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
The true way goes over a rope which is not stretched at any great height but just above the ground. It seems more designed to make people stumble than to be walked upon.
-- Franz Kafka
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
Slashdot Mirror
This "brain-damaged" epithet is getting sorely overworked. When we can
speak of someone or something being flawed, impaired, marred, spoiled;
batty, bedlamite, bonkers, buggy, cracked, crazed, cuckoo, daft, demented,
deranged, loco, lunatic, mad, maniac, mindless, non compos mentis, nuts,
Reaganite, screwy, teched, unbalanced, unsound, witless, wrong; senseless,
spastic, spasmodic, convulsive; doped, spaced-out, stoned, zonked; {beef,
beetle,block,dung,thick}headed, dense, doltish, dull, duncical, numskulled,
pinhead; asinine, fatuous, foolish, silly, simple; brute, lumbering, oafish;
half-assed, incompetent; backward, retarded, imbecilic, moronic; when we have
a whole precisely nuanced vocabulary of intellectual abuse to draw upon,
individually and in combination, isn't it a little to be
limited to a single, now quite trite, adjective?
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
Albert Einstein, when asked to describe radio, replied: "You see, wire
telegraph is a kind of a very, very long cat. You pull his tail in New
York and his head is meowing in Los Angeles. Do you understand this?
And radio operates exactly the same way: you send signals here, they
receive them there. The only difference is that there is no cat."
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
UNIX Trix
/etc/passwd
For those of you in the reseller business, here is a helpful tip that will
save your support staff a few hours of precious time. Before you send your
next machine out to an untrained client, change the permissions on
to 666 and make sure there is a copy somewhere on the disk. Now when they
forget the root password, you can easily login as an ordinary user and correct
the damage. Having a bootable tape (for larger machines) is not a bad idea
either. If you need some help, give us a call.
-- CommUNIXque 1:1, ASCAR Business Systems
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
One day it was announced that the young monk Kyogen had reached
an enlightened state. Much impressed by this news, several of his peers
went to speak with him.
"We have heard that you are enlightened. Is this true?" his fellow
students inquired.
"It is", Kyogen answered.
"Tell us", said a friend, "how do you feel?"
"As miserable as ever", replied the enlightened Kyogen.
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
quit When the quit statement is read, the bc processor
is terminated, regardless of where the quit state-
ment is found. For example, "if (0 == 1) quit"
will cause bc to terminate.
-- seen in the manpage for "bc". Note the "if" statement's logic
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
As soon as we started programming, we found to our surprise that it wasn't
as easy to get programs right as we had thought. Debugging had to be
discovered. I can remember the exact instant when I realized that a large
part of my life from then on was going to be spent in finding mistakes in
my own programs.
-- Maurice Wilkes, designer of EDSAC, on programming, 1949
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
... Linux und seine Programme sind damit so etwas wie ein real existierender ...
Sozialismus der besseren Art
-- Christian Seel in der Berliner Morgenpost v. 9.3.1997
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
Yet creeds mean very little, Coth answered the dark god, still speaking
almost gently. The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all
possible worlds; and the pessimist fears this is true.
-- James Cabell, "The Silver Stallion"
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
I have a dog; I named him Stay. So when I'd go to call him, I'd say, "Here,
Stay, here..." but he got wise to that. Now when I call him he ignores me
and just keeps on typing.
-- Steven Wright
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
aIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11 :) Plenty of light that way.
MY LIGHT JUST DIED
I AM SO SAD
I'm blind! I'm blind!
Light?
Turn all your xterms to black-on-white
-- Seen on #Debian
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
Once upon a time there was a DOS user who saw Unix, and saw that it was
good. After typing cp on his DOS machine at home, he downloaded GNU's
unix tools ported to DOS and installed them. He rm'd, cp'd, and mv'd
happily for many days, and upon finding elvis, he vi'd and was happy. After
a long day at work (on a Unix box) he came home, started editing a file,
and couldn't figure out why he couldn't suspend vi (w/ ctrl-z) to do
a compile.
-- Erik Troan, ewt@tipper.oit.unc.edu
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
Real computer scientists despise the idea of actual hardware. Hardware has
limitations, software doesn't. It's a real shame that Turing machines are
so poor at I/O.
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
#define BITCOUNT(x) (((BX_(x)+(BX_(x)>>4)) & 0x0F0F0F0F) % 255)
#define BX_(x) ((x) - (((x)>>1)&0x77777777) \
- (((x)>>2)&0x33333333) \
- (((x)>>3)&0x11111111))
-- really weird C code to count the number of bits in a word
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
X windows:
You'd better sit down.
Don't laugh. It could be YOUR thesis project.
Why do it right when you can do it wrong?
Live the nightmare.
Our bugs run faster.
When it absolutely, positively HAS to crash overnight.
There ARE no rules.
You'll wish we were kidding.
Everything you never wanted in a window system. And more.
Dissatisfaction guaranteed.
There's got to be a better way.
The next best thing to keypunching.
Leave the thrashing to us.
We wrote the book on core dumps.
Even your dog won't like it.
More than enough rope.
Garbage at your fingertips.
Incompatibility. Shoddiness. Uselessness.
X windows.
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
It is not enough that I should succeed. Others must fail.
-- Ray Kroc, Founder of McDonald's
[Also attributed to David Merrick. Ed.]
It is not enough to succeed. Others must fail.
-- Gore Vidal
[Great minds think alike? Ed.]
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
gorgo: *lol* :) :>
joey: what's so funny?
shh, joey is losing all sanity from lack of sleep
'yes joey, very funny'
Humor him
-- Seen on #Debian
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
It is imperative when flying coach that you restrain any tendency toward
the vividly imaginative. For although it may momentarily appear to be the
case, it is not at all likely that the cabin is entirely inhabited by
crying babies smoking inexpensive domestic cigars.
-- Fran Lebowitz, "Social Studies"
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
Home centers are designed for the do-it-yourselfer who's willing to ...
pay higher prices for the convenience of being able to shop for lumber,
hardware, and toasters all in one location. Notice I say "shop for," as
opposed to "obtain." This is the major drawback of home centers: they are
always out of everything except artificial Christmas trees. The home center
employees have no time to reorder merchandise because they are too busy
applying little price stickers to every object -- every board, washer, nail
and screw -- in the entire store
Let's say a piece in your toilet tank breaks, so you remove the
broken part, take it to the home center, and ask an employee if he has a
replacement. The employee, who has never is his life even seen the inside
of a toilet tank, will peer at the broken part in very much the same way
that a member of a primitive Amazon jungle tribe would look at an electronic
calculator, and then say, "We're expecting a shipment of these sometime
around the middle of next week."
-- Dave Barry, "The Taming of the Screw"
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
The so-called "desktop metaphor" of today's workstations is instead an
"airplane-seat" metaphor. Anyone who has shuffled a lap full of papers
while seated between two portly passengers will recognize the difference --
one can see only a very few things at once.
-- Fred Brooks
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
We can use symlinks of course... syslogd would be a symlink to syslogp and
ftpd and ircd would be linked to ftpp and ircp... and of course the
point-to-point protocal paenguin.
-- Kevin M. Bealer, commenting on the penguin Linux logo
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
Does biff in bo work
coz it biffin doesn't beep
an if biff in bo is broke
then biff in bo I will delete
I've tried biff in bo with 'y'
I've tried biff in bo with '-y'
no biffin output does it show
so poor wee biff is gonna go.
-- John Spence on debian-user
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
Recession is when your neighbor loses his job. Depression is when you
lose your job. These economic downturns are very difficult to predict,
but sophisticated econometric modeling houses like Data Resources and
Chase Econometrics have successfully predicted 14 of the last 3 recessions.
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
Two hundred years ago today, Irma Chine of White Plains, New York, was
performing her normal housekeeping routines. She was interrupted by
British soldiers who, rallying to the call of their supervisor, General
Hughes, sought to gain control of the voter registration lists kept in
her home. Masking her fear and thinking fast, Mrs. Chine quickly divided
a nearby apple in two and deftly stored the list in its center. Upon
entering, the British blatantly violated every conceivable convention,
and, though they went through the house virtually bit by bit, their
search was fruitless. They had to return empty handed. Word of the
incident propagated rapidly through the region. This historic event
became the first documented use of core storage for the saving of registers.
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
Anything labeled "NEW" and/or "IMPROVED" isn't. The label means the
price went up. The label "ALL NEW", "COMPLETELY NEW", or "GREAT NEW"
means the price went way up.
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...
The true way goes over a rope which is not stretched at any great height
but just above the ground. It seems more designed to make people stumble
than to be walked upon.
-- Franz Kafka
- this post brought to you by the Automated Last Post Generator...