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User: worst_name_ever

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Comments · 267

  1. The actual prime suspect on Workweek Causes Climate Changes · · Score: 5, Funny
    The prime suspect is aerosol / cloud interactions.

    No, the prime suspect is my co-worker Bob. Man, does that guy ever have B.O. Jeez.

  2. Re:Bought by a French company... on Red Herring Comes Back · · Score: 1

    Freedom Herring. Now there is an excellent name for a band.

  3. Obligatory programming joke on New ssh Exploit in the Wild · · Score: 1, Funny
    The lengths some people will goto

    Remember to use long jumps if you want to goto more than 255 bytes of pride-damaging.

  4. Won't someone think of the pr0n? on VeriSign Looks At Earning Money on Domain Typos · · Score: 0
    I wonder if this will cut down on the number of pr0n sites that register commonly-misspelled domain names... e.g. www.whitehouse.com, www.alttavista.com, etc. (okay, the second one redirects you to the real site nowadays, but you get the idea)

    ...and, now that I RTFA, I guess this will only apply to unregistered domain names, so as long as the pr0n folks keep registering typo-domain-names, people will still be able to claim they got "accidentally redirected to a pr0n site" when they're caught at work.

  5. Japan's participation on Japan, China & South Korea May Develop OS · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    Insiders have revealed that Japan's major contribution to this new operating system will be the drivers for the tentacle interface.

  6. Re:Target audience? on NEC to Introduce 3D Laptop Next Year? · · Score: 1
    So who are they targetting with this contraption?

    Maybe executives who want to add a little more "in-your-face" to their presentations:

    "This month's sales figures for Mountain Dew are [click] EXTREME!!!!"

  7. Which came first? on DeCSS Loses Free Speech Shield · · Score: 3, Funny
    ...the state Supreme Court ruled that property and trade secrets rights outranked free speech rights in this case...

    Right, because you know, since property and trade secrets rights are guaranteed in the Zeroth Amendment to the Bill Of Rights, they outrank the First Amendment, don't they?

  8. Re:Obvious on Japanese Robot on Diplomatic Tour · · Score: 5, Funny
    Even if the robots weren't completely autonomous, "messenger bots" would allow, in my opinion, high-level people to travel to unsecured locations safely.

    Or, to take your fanciful idea to an even more outlandish extreme, perhaps some kind of device for remote communication could be created, which would allow a person in one place to hold a conversation with another person in a far-off land, without actually dispatching a messenger or postal-letter. By harnessing the power of the electron-current, which as I'm sure you know is many dozens of times swifter than the fastest steam-ship, such tele-phonic conversations could be made possible. And, though it may seem to you, the gentle reader, to be the most outlandish type of science-fiction, perhaps this new tele-phonic science could be used by the captains of industry to contact the everyday citizen in their own homes at a convenient hour, such as at meal-time.

    Ah, truly, the wonders of our age shall know no bounds!

  9. Technology marches on on Optical Recognition System To Foil Card Counting? · · Score: 3, Funny
    ...and even tell the difference between your drink, napkin, cards, chips, and ashtrays

    And thus, the robots have finally surpassed the cognitive abilities of drunken gambling addicts.

  10. First quantum post on Quantum Logic Gate Created Using Excitons · · Score: 5, Funny
    an exciton is a combination of an electron and a hole in a semiconductor or insulator in an excited state

    Please be advised that by posting this with my quantum computer, I am able to make all possible lewd comments about the above sentence simultaneously.

  11. Re:ramblings from a subscriber... on Will Internet Users Pay for Content? · · Score: 1
    On a different note, doesn't it seem like the Microsoft bunch and hangers-on spend A LOT more ad money here than Open Source?

    Probably because many of the Open Source websites that would advertise on Slashdot are themselves also just websites who make their money from ad revenue. As the world discovered in the late 90's, too many levels of indirection in website-ad-revenue-linkage means the Second Law eventually reduces everyone's profit to zero.

  12. Re:ramblings from a subscriber... on Will Internet Users Pay for Content? · · Score: 5, Insightful
    I need to give them something back. /. still allows you to read the content, post on the content, etc, w/o having to pay.

    Hmm - Maybe you should log in as a non-subscribing user and check out the huge .NET ad in the middle of the page! Somebody sure seems to be making money from my browsing...

  13. Re:Future tech... on Holographic Keypads Float Into View · · Score: 1
    With a few extra advances in holographic technology this could lead to input devices that a perfectly tailored to your body shape and preferences.

    And with a few extra advances in holographic pr0n technology, it could also lead to input devices that are perfectly tailored to your body shape preferences...

  14. I'm safe! on MPAA Opens Anti-filesharing Website · · Score: 5, Funny

    I was worried when I read this article, until I remembered that I am immune to this kind of thing ever since I bought the software that prevents my computer from broadcasting an IP address. I'm so glad I clicked on that popup ad!

  15. Your plastic pal that's fun to be with? on My Pal Mickey -- Interactive Theme Park Doll · · Score: 5, Funny

    I think I'll pass for now, but give me a call when these come equipped with Genuine People Personalities.

  16. Correction on ZigBee Low-Power Wireless Networking · · Score: 4, Informative
    Zigbee is the trademark for IEEE 802.15 Personal Area network low data rate standard.

    Actually that's not entirely true. The 802.15.4 standard defines the physical radio behavior of the personal area network; ZigBee is the logical network and application software that runs on top of 802.15.

    Ref: ZigBee FAQ

  17. A process, eh? on Ian Murdock: Linux is a Process, Not a Product · · Score: -1, Redundant
    Oh, so Linux is a process now? Excellent. Please excuse me while I kill -9 Linux.

    Sincerely,
    Bill Gates

  18. Fin? on Skydiving Across the English Channel · · Score: 5, Funny
    From the photos accompanying the article, it looks as if the thing strapped to his back was less of a "fin" and more of a small set of wings. If so, the message here is basically "Man puts on tiny hang glider and, after being air-dropped from high altitude, glides for a few miles."

    I forsee a day when humans will attach themselves to ever-larger winged contraptions and travel further and further with each passing year. Perhaps, some day in the far future, these "aero-planes" might be equipped with powerful "jet-engines" which would enable the intrepid pioneers of the sky to travel across the very oceans themselves. Perhaps pretzels could also be served on these voyages.

  19. Re:So he made it? on Skydiving Across the English Channel · · Score: 2, Funny
    Nobody had any blitz flashbacks?

    One would think not, as the Blitz was in the other direction...

  20. Re:And what happens? on Microbes for Bioremediation · · Score: 4, Funny

    I'd like to remind them that, as a Slashdot poster with Excellent karma, I can be helpful in rounding up others to toil in their underground agar caves!

  21. This is news? on High End Silent Cooling For Graphics Cards · · Score: 4, Funny

    I could already have told you that pipe technology greatly enhances enjoyment of the pretty colors and swirly lights so common in today's high-end games.

  22. Re:Great.. on In-Dash DIN-form-factor Car PC · · Score: 1
    With a car, fan sound is less of an annoyance than in an otherwise silent office of living room.

    Unless you're in one of those cool hybrid cars and the gas engine is powered down. :)

  23. Re:proprietary hardware on Sony Switches To Its Own Processor For Handhelds · · Score: 4, Informative
    Even if the hardware is better, proprietary hardware is bad. It limits the choices of what you can do with the devicce you own.

    Proprietary != Incompatible.

    The new Sony CPU mentioned in the article is a fairly normal ARM core with Sony's choice of peripherals built on-chip. This is a perfectly normal thing to do in the industry.

  24. Heisenberg on Big Brother Gets a Brain · · Score: 5, Funny
    They just want to know where we are, and what we're doing at all times

    Too bad for them, though, that keeping tabs on my position will cause them to lose track of my velocity...

  25. Solution on Public Confused by Tech Lingo · · Score: 2, Funny
    It's based on a survey done by AMD asking the definitions of words such as megahertz

    I submit that people would be much less confused if AMD would spec its processors in terms of megawatts instead. After all, we already know they are excellent space heaters. ;)