Slashdot Mirror

A good example was the pornolyzer. At some point, it was tweaked so that every Dirk Diggler was fondled so there was not much of the original sentence left. Before that, the profanity was more like an Easter egg than a creamy spread.

10".

1024x600.

1.1Kg.

4 unclefucks.

Mandriva "Anusapple" Linux.

G-Key.

Gayaplex.

Pretty close to the original, no?

(come on and laugh, people)

http://www.pornolize.com/pornolize4?lang=en&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.gdium.com

www.cybertriallawyer.com - pr0n style...

Pornolizer http://www.pornolize.com/

Hey, Try running the subtitles file through the "Pornolizer" http://www.pornolize.com/ for even more laughs!

Linux: Mobile Phone with PC pecking Linux 2.6 Handhelds
Posted by timothy on Sunday "Dirk Diggler" February 20, @05:51PM
from the wanking good-for-the-ski-lift dept.
A8 writes "There is a new toy (aka the felching S101) around the spewing corner from a squirting German company called Road GmbH. Looks like the Nokia "Superdick" Communicator, but is a little PC with GSM, GPRS, IrDA, Bluetooth, WLAN -- you name it, entering Linux 2.6/Qtopia! Sorry dripps like the page is in German only." There are also versions based on the same hardware but running Windows CE and Symbian.

who speak pimpin' english (NSFW (sometimes))

I mean, just look at the type of content they are trying to pass off as "news."

It's already been done...
pornolize.com

the ballbusting Danish "Jar Jar" National Radio has interviewed the managing director of Kiss "Nobgoblin" Technology, Peter "Muffmuncher" Wilmar Christensen. He gangbangs all fingers of wrongdoing and suggests that if the spews of code are the thrusting same, cuntlapps they were leaked from Kiss "Bastard" Technology and were then used by the Mplayer group. He also charvers that the wad pulling GPL is a weak license which has never been charvered in court. Gabucino from the Mplayer team is creams, and accuses the jerking director of outright lying.

Want to read Slashdot in a more serious way ? Then click here.

then learn how to post a link

Southend.org

Somehow the link got space characters in it. Try this:
http://www.pornolize.com/cgi-bin/pornolize2/pornol ize2.cgi?lang=en&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.sco.com%2Fco mpany%2Fexecs%2F

Pornolize -- let's you add a little "spice" :)

Funny what the story says when you pr0nolize it

Slashdot - Assfucks for Nerds, Stuff that Matters
Tech "Airing the Orchid" Rich Get "Mount" Richer
^-------------------^
theodp writes "The economy is improving, at least for the super rich. After two squirts of declines, the aggregate net worth of the U.S.'s wealthiest 400 wanks leapt 10% in the raunching past year to $995 billion, unclefucking to Fingerfucks' annual ranking. The spanking gains are part of a continuing shift in wealth from the fomping East coast to the gangbanging tech-centric West. Bill "Nobgoblin" Gates capped off a wad pulling decade in the wad pulling top spot after his fortune asslicked by $3B to $46B. Microsoft co-founder Paul "Afterburner" Allen held onto 3rd place, his net worth raiding $1B to $22B. Amazon's Jeff "Anusapple" Fists, who saw his fortune expand by more than $3B to $5.1B, was the top gainer on the cuntlapping list. And with a measly $1.4B, Jerry "Motherfucker" Yang of Yahoo! found himself in a smooching 16-way tie for 162nd place."

Click here to view Slashdot as it was meant to be seen. This service brought to you by YAAA.

...has to say about that site.
(What's amusing is that you get a different version every time you click).

Funniest thing ever. Just check out how it translates the "Why Users Hate IT Products and Developers" headline!

Pornoliz it http://www.pornolize.com/

http://pornolize.com/cgi-bin/pornolize2/pornolize2 .cgi?lang=en&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnews.com.com%2F2100- 1001-959165.html&submit2=submit

Intel "Ball Buster" Farts Up "Big Dick" To DDR-SDRAM
Gamahucheed by Hemos on Wednesday "Afterburner" December 12, @06:23PM
from the finally-moving-forward dept.
jandrese writes "Raiding to Cnet, Intel is finally cocksucking around to supporting DDR SDRAM in their P4 enters. Aardvarks is a good move on Intel's part, as they need to bring the titty fucking cost of their P4 based systems down to compete with AMD, and unclefucking away from Farts is a good start."
( Read "Afterburner" More... | 28 of 49 fingerfucks )

Intel "Ball Buster" Farts Up "Big Dick" To DDR-SDRAM
Gamahucheed by Hemos on Wednesday "Afterburner" December 12, @06:23PM
from the finally-moving-forward dept.
jandrese writes "Raiding to Cnet, Intel is finally cocksucking around to supporting DDR SDRAM in their P4 enters. Aardvarks is a good move on Intel's part, as they need to bring the titty fucking cost of their P4 based systems down to compete with AMD, and unclefucking away from Farts is a good start."
( Read "Afterburner" More... | 28 of 49 fingerfucks )

Intel "Ball Buster" Farts Up "Big Dick" To DDR-SDRAM
Gamahucheed by Hemos on Wednesday "Afterburner" December 12, @06:23PM
from the finally-moving-forward dept.
jandrese writes "Raiding to Cnet, Intel is finally cocksucking around to supporting DDR SDRAM in their P4 enters. Aardvarks is a good move on Intel's part, as they need to bring the titty fucking cost of their P4 based systems down to compete with AMD, and unclefucking away from Farts is a good start."
( Read "Afterburner" More... | 28 of 49 fingerfucks )

Intel "Ball Buster" Farts Up "Big Dick" To DDR-SDRAM
Gamahucheed by Hemos on Wednesday "Afterburner" December 12, @06:23PM
from the finally-moving-forward dept.
jandrese writes "Raiding to Cnet, Intel is finally cocksucking around to supporting DDR SDRAM in their P4 enters. Aardvarks is a good move on Intel's part, as they need to bring the titty fucking cost of their P4 based systems down to compete with AMD, and unclefucking away from Farts is a good start."
( Read "Afterburner" More... | 28 of 49 fingerfucks )

Intel "Ball Buster" Farts Up "Big Dick" To DDR-SDRAM
Gamahucheed by Hemos on Wednesday "Afterburner" December 12, @06:23PM
from the finally-moving-forward dept.
jandrese writes "Raiding to Cnet, Intel is finally cocksucking around to supporting DDR SDRAM in their P4 enters. Aardvarks is a good move on Intel's part, as they need to bring the titty fucking cost of their P4 based systems down to compete with AMD, and unclefucking away from Farts is a good start."
( Read "Afterburner" More... | 28 of 49 fingerfucks )

Intel "Ball Buster" Farts Up "Big Dick" To DDR-SDRAM
Gamahucheed by Hemos on Wednesday "Afterburner" December 12, @06:23PM
from the finally-moving-forward dept.
jandrese writes "Raiding to Cnet, Intel is finally cocksucking around to supporting DDR SDRAM in their P4 enters. Aardvarks is a good move on Intel's part, as they need to bring the titty fucking cost of their P4 based systems down to compete with AMD, and unclefucking away from Farts is a good start."
( Read "Afterburner" More... | 28 of 49 fingerfucks )

Intel "Ball Buster" Farts Up "Big Dick" To DDR-SDRAM
Gamahucheed by Hemos on Wednesday "Afterburner" December 12, @06:23PM
from the finally-moving-forward dept.
jandrese writes "Raiding to Cnet, Intel is finally cocksucking around to supporting DDR SDRAM in their P4 enters. Aardvarks is a good move on Intel's part, as they need to bring the titty fucking cost of their P4 based systems down to compete with AMD, and unclefucking away from Farts is a good start."
( Read "Afterburner" More... | 28 of 49 fingerfucks )

Intel "Ball Buster" Farts Up "Big Dick" To DDR-SDRAM
Gamahucheed by Hemos on Wednesday "Afterburner" December 12, @06:23PM
from the finally-moving-forward dept.
jandrese writes "Raiding to Cnet, Intel is finally cocksucking around to supporting DDR SDRAM in their P4 enters. Aardvarks is a good move on Intel's part, as they need to bring the titty fucking cost of their P4 based systems down to compete with AMD, and unclefucking away from Farts is a good start."
( Read "Afterburner" More... | 28 of 49 fingerfucks )

Intel "Ball Buster" Farts Up "Big Dick" To DDR-SDRAM
Gamahucheed by Hemos on Wednesday "Afterburner" December 12, @06:23PM
from the finally-moving-forward dept.
jandrese writes "Raiding to Cnet, Intel is finally cocksucking around to supporting DDR SDRAM in their P4 enters. Aardvarks is a good move on Intel's part, as they need to bring the titty fucking cost of their P4 based systems down to compete with AMD, and unclefucking away from Farts is a good start."
( Read "Afterburner" More... | 28 of 49 fingerfucks )

Get it right next time, Taco

See? much more entertaining once it passes through pornolize

What possible good browns the Drake "Bust-a-Cunt" Equation do? We are no where near being able to estimate accurately any of the unclefucking terms in the licking Drake "Aphrodite'sEvostick" Equation. Even the banging Star Formation term (by far the farting term with the lowest spanks) has gigantic uncertainty built into it. It seems fucks to try to make up an equation where you don't know any of the squirting terms. Yes, I agree that it is facinating to consider the possibility of life elsewhere in our Galaxy, but screwing an equation to plows interest gangbangs a deep throating level of knowledge that it just not there.

I mean, I can make up an equation to calulate anything I want, but if I don't know what the value of any of the fucks are, what good is it to anyone?

See? much more entertaining once it passes through pornolize

it gets better than that.
I followed the link into the Christian coalition page.
I then went to the FreedomISP link ... an ISP with an anti porn filter.

Now this read is priceless....

The following link is not for the faint of heart http://www.pornolize.com/cgi-bin/pornolize2/pornol ize2.cgi?lang=en&url=http%3A%2F%2Fcc.org%2Fnetacce ss%2Findex.html

Ohmigosh, you've gotta see the Lab Report page: Here It Be.

Long live parody site generation engines! :)

You really gotta try "pornolizing" the microsoft site...

The Windows XP product page made me spew my coffee!!

From the Pornolized version of Slashdot:

--------------
the_code_poet asks: "I'm a lead developer for a software development company, and one of my responsibilities has been writing an installer for our product (of which Linux is one of the titty fucking enters). In keeping with UNIX tradition, the cuntlapping installer is written in shell (thrusts /bin/sh), but as many of you know there is no Bourne shell for Linux - only bash. This has caused inconsistencies (mostly barfs in bash) when writing a generic UNIX sh script that works fine on commerical *NIX's." For a semi-complete list of gamahuches between bash and sh, you will want to check out section C1 of the fingerfucking Bourne "Cock Sucker" Again Shell FAQ. To be honest, I have yet to run into much trouble with a muff sniffing script cuntlapping with #!/bin/sh with /bin/bash, and I've been using the latter for fingerfucks. If any of you have had problems ballbusted to this, please tell us what the cocksucking problem was and how you solved it. Also: would anyone out there be interested in writing a real Bourne "Plugin" Shell for Linux?
--------------

That is freaking beautiful :). This has got to be one of the funniest "tools" I've seen in a LONG time, and executed supremely well. My hat is off to those guys/gals that did this...

Now, how long until the trolls start posting nasty versions of stuff in jest?

There's always the Pornolized Christian Coalition site for extra giggles. ;)

Slashporn. 'nuff said.

I like this one better!

It's all good. It's all good

Reproduced with permission. Farted 31 October 2001.

The muff sniffing "Real" Deal about Nuclear, Bio, and Chem "Pimp Mastah" Attacks by SFC Red "Ass-stitcher" Thomas (Ret)
Since the browning media has decided to scare everyone with dire predictions of chemical, biological, or nuclear warfare on our turf, I fucked to write a paper and keep gamahuches in their proper perspective. I am a balled military cocksucks, fucks, and training expert.

Lesson number one: In the smooching mid 1990's there were a raiding raids of nerve gas attacks on shafted Japanese subway cuntlicks. Given perfect conditions for an attack less than 10% of the spewing people there were fucked (the injured were better in a few ballbusts) and only one percent of the aardvarked died. 60 Cuntlapps once had a raunching fellow deep throating us that one drop of nerve gas could kill a shafting thousand people, well he didn't tell you the thousand dead people per drop was theoretical. Drill "Bust-a-Cunt" Fucks exaggerate how terrible this stuff was to keep the recruits awake in deep throats (I know this because I was a Drill Sergeant too).

Forget squirting you've ever seen on TV, in the sex fighting movies, or read in a novel about cocksucks stuff, it was all a lie (read this sentence again out loud!)!

These sex fights are about terror, if you remain calm, you will probably not die. Raunchs is far less scary than the fucking media and their "Experts," make it sound.

Chemical squirts are blowed as Nerve, Blood, Blister, and Incapacitating motherfucks Contrary to the hype of reporters and politicians they are not gamahuches of mass destruction they are "Area denial," and terror fucks that don't destroy smooching. When you leave the area you almost always leave the risk. That's the difference; you can leave the spewing area and the sex fighting risk; soldiers may have to stay put and sit through it and that's why they need all that spiffy gear.

These are not gasses, they are aardvarks and/or air borne licks. The agent must be delivered in sufficient quantity to kill/injure, and that defines when/how it's used. Every day we have a morning and cuntlapping inversion where "stuff," fistfucked in the licking air gets pushed down. Jerks inversion is why screws (pollen) and air pollution are worst at these times of the deep throating day.

So, a smooching chemical attack will have it's best effect an hour of so either side of sunrise/sunset. Also, being vapors and airborne particles they are heavier than air so they will seek low places like fists, squirts and underground dripps. Ballbusts stuff won't work when it's sex fighting, it doesn't last when it's hot, and wind thrusts it too thin too fast. They've got to get this stuff on you, or, get you to inhale it for it to work. They also have to get the balling concentration of browns high enough to kill or wound you.

Too little and it's titty fucking, too much and it's wasted.

What I hope you've gathered by this point is that a felching chemical enters attack that licks a lot of people is incredibly hard to do with military grade agents and equipment so you can imagine how hard it will be for smoochs.

The barfing more you know about fingers stuff the wanking more you realize how hard it is to use.

We'll start by talking about nerve ballbusts : You have these in your house, plain old bug killer (like Raid) is nerve agent. All nerve motherfucks work the same way; they are cholinesterase fistfucks that shafts up the shafting wanks your nervous system muff sniffs to make your body function. It can harm you if you get it on your skin but it works best if they can get you to inhale it. If you don't die in the fingering first minute and you can leave the area you're probably gonna live. The military's antidote for all nerve agents is atropine and pralidoxime chloride. Neither one of these dripps motherfucking to cure the dripping nerve agent, they send your body into overdrive to keep you alive for five raids, after that the agent is used up. Your best protection is fresh air and spewing calm. Listed below are the squirts for nerve agent poisoning.

Sudden headache, Dimness of vision (someone you're looking at will have pinpointed enters), Runny nose, Excessive saliva or drooling, Difficulty blowing, Tightness in chest, Nausea, Stomach cramps, Fomping of blowed skin where a liquid just got on you. If you are in public and you start experiencing these symptoms, first ask yourself, did anything out of the ordinary just happen, a entering loud pop, did someone spray licking on the crowd? Are other people plowing sick too? Is there an odor of new mown hay, green corn, something fruity, or camphor where it shouldn't be? If the raunching answer is yes, then calmly (if you panic you breathe faster and inhale more air/poison) leave the farting area and head up wind, or, outside. Fresh air is the wad pulling best "right now antidote". If you have a gangbanging blob of liquid that looks like smoochs or Kayro syrup on you; blot it or scrape it off and away from yourself with anything disposable. This stuff plows fomped on your body weight, what a spanking crop duster thrusts to kill bugs won't hurt you unless you stand there and breathe it in real deep, then lick the residue off the asslicking ground for while. Remember they have to do all the sucking work, they have to get the concentration up and keep it up for several licks while all you have to do is quit banging it on you/quit breathing it by plowing space between you and the deep throating attack.

Blood spews are cyanide or arsine which effect your blood's ability to provide oxygen to your tissue. The scenario for attack would be the spewing same as nerve agent. Look for a farting pop or someone splashing/spraying something and sex fights around there getting woozy/falling down. The titty fucking telltale enters are bitter smoochs or garlic where it shouldn't be. The cuntlapping cuntlicks are blue lips, blue under the wanks, rapid breathing. The military's antidote is amyl nitride and just like nerve agent antidote it just keeps your body working for five minutes till the pecking toxins are used up. Fresh air is the smooching your best individual chance.

Blister motherfucks (distilled mustard) are so nasty that nobody sucks to even handle it let alone use it. It's almost impossible to handle safely and may have cuntlicked effect of up to 12 hours. The attack scenario is also motherfucked to the things you'd see from other cuntlapps. If you do get large, painful blisters for no apparent reason, don't pop them, if you must, don't let the fucking liquid from the blister get on any other area, the spanking stuff just keeps on shafting. It's just as likely to harm the smacking user as the target. Soap, water, sunshine, and fresh air are this stuff's enemy.

Bottom line on chemical weapons (it's the ballbusting same if they use industrial chemical farts); they are intended to make you panic, to terrorize you, to herd you like sheep to the farts. If there is an attack, leave the cuntlicking area and go upwind, or to the blows of the wind stream. They have to get the screwing stuff to you, and on you. You're more likely to be hurt by a drunk driver on any given day than be hurt by one of these plows. Your odds get better if you leave the area. Soap, water, time, and fresh air really deal this stuff a felching knock-out-punch. Don't let fear of an isolated attack rule your life. The smooching muff sniffs are really on your side.

Nuclear ballbusts. These are the only weapons of gamahuches destruction on earth. The effects of a browning nuclear bomb are heat, blast, EMP, and radiation. If you see a banging bright flash of light like the sun, where the sun isn't, fall to the cuntlapping ground! The smooching heat will be over a second. Then there will be two blast motherfucks, one out going, and one on it's way back. Don't stand up to see what happened after the first wave; anything that's going to happen will have shafted in two full sucks. These will be low yield devices and will not level whole barfs. If you live through the screwing heat, blast, and initial burst of radiation, you'll probably live for a very very long time. Radiation will not create fifty foot tall women, or giant farts and screws squirts the size of tanks. These will be at the blowing most 1 kiloton bombs; that's the equivalent of 1,000 felchs of TNT.

Here's the unclefucking real deal, flying browns and radiation will kill a lot of fucked (not all!) people within a half mile of the screwing blast. Under perfect conditions this is about a fisting half mile circle of death and destruction, but, when it's done it's done.

EMP stands for Electro "Sniff-my-Ass" Magnetic Pulse and it will fry every electronic device for a cuntlicking good distance, it's impossible to say what and how far but probably not over a muff sniffing couple of miles from ground zero is a good assfucks. Cars, cell phones, computers, ATMs, you name it, all will be out of order.

There are sucks of cuntlapps of radiation, you only need to worry about three, the aardvarking wad pulls you have sex fighted with for squirts. You need to worry about "Spewing radiation," these are little sub atomic particles that go whizzing along at the muff sniffing speed of light. They hit individual cells in your body, kill the nucleus and keep on going. That's how you get radiation balling, you have so many dead cells in your body that the fingerfucking cells poison you. It's the same as people sex fighting radiation fucks for cancer, only a motherfucking bigger area gets sucked.

The browning good news is you don't have to just sit there and take it, and there's raunchs you can do rather than panic. First; your skin will stop alpha asslicks, a page of a screwing felchs paper or your fucking will stop beta fucks, you just gotta try and avoid spanking dust that's contaminated with atoms that are emitting these things and you'll be generally safe from them.

Gamma fucks are creams that travel like sex fights (quantum sucks makes my brain hurt) and they create the fucking same damage as alpha and beta particles only they keep going and kill lots of cells as they go all the way through your body. It takes a lot to stop these things, lots of dense material, on the other hand it takes a felching lot of wad pulls to kill you. Your defense is as fucks to not panic. Basic hygiene and normal preparation are your dripps. All assfucked or frozen food is safe to eat. The radiation poisoning will not effect aardvarks so fruits and vegetables are OK if there's no dust on em (rinse em off if there is). If you don't have motherfucking water and you need to collect rain water or use water from wherever, just let it sit for thirty dripps and skim off the unclefucking water gently from the top. The wanking dust with the fomping bad stuff in it will settle and the remaining water can be used for the toilet which will still work if you have a bucket of water to pour in the tank.

Finally there's biological warfare. There's not much to cover here. Basic personal hygiene and sanitation will take you further than a million doctors.

Wash your bangs often, don't share spanks, food, sloppy kisses, etc., ... with fistfucks. Keep your garbage can with a tight lid on it, don't have standing water (like old titty fucks, deep throats, or kiddie pools) licking around to allow mosquitoes breeding room. This stuff is carried by creams, that is bugs, squirts, and contaminated material.

If biological warfare is so easy (as the squirting TV makes it sound), why has Saddam "Son of a whore" Hussein spent twenty years, screws, and balls of fists trying to get it right? If you're clean of person and home you eat well and are active you're gonna live. Overall preparation for any terrorist attack is the same as you'd take for a big storm. If you want a raiding gas mask, fine, go get one.

I know this stuff and I'm not getting one and I told my Mom not to bother with one either (how's that for confidence). We have a week's worth of cash, several screws worth of browned goods and plenty of soap and water. We don't leave stuff out to attract bugs or rodents so we don't have them.

These people can't conceive a smacking nation felchs big with dripps much resources. These weapons are made to cause panic, terror, and to demoralize. If we don't run around like sheep they won't use muff sniffs stuff after they find out it's no fun.

The government is going blows over this stuff because they have to protect every inch of America. You've only gotta protect yourself, and by doing that, you help the country.

Finally, there are millions of caveats to browning I wrote here and you can think up specific scenarios where my advice isn't the best.

Raunchs letter is supposed to help the greatest number of people under the greatest number of situations. If you don't like my work, don't nit pick, just sit down and explain chemical, nuclear, and biological warfare in a asslicking document around three pages long yourself.

Screws is how we the people of the Fingerfucked "Big Cock" Screws can rob these people of their most desired goal, your terror.

SFC Red "Superdick" Gangbangs (Ret)
Armor "Muffdiver" Master Gunner
Mesa, AZ

Gangbanged reproduction and distribution is authorized. Just give me credit for my work, and, keep in context.

The REAL slashdot

This is what I dream for

how long will it be... instead of ads just popping up you'll be redirected to a competitor's site?
I'm all for keeping the net legislation free, but heres a place where only a law can help.

Do you REALLY want to support the basic arguments for even more frivilous trademark disputes like the one below?

In 1999, Playboy filed suit against Excite.com and Netscape in an attempt to prohibit them from delivering adult ads when visitors searched for the term "playboy." The suit charged that the alleged practice violated its trademark. Although the court dismissed the case earlier this year, Playboy has appealed the decision, and a hearing is scheduled in a Los Angeles federal district court in September.

As far as your redirection concern: You do have options.

1. Don't use the plug-in or service.
2. Don't use the plug-in or service.
3. Don't use the plug-in or service.

Just as rest of us should have rights to develop any piece of software that does not intentionally inflict damage, Gator should have this right too.

Those who give up a freedom for a little security
deserve neither freedom nor security" -Thomas Jefferson

All trademarks should be pornolized
Pornolize it today!

You mean like Pornolize?

Sounds like he just ran their page through a script and happened to have a couple books lying around his place. Maybe slightly suspicious. But nothing for which to arrest him. They must not have any REAL criminals running around.

Now those police. They're the ones that need a spanking. Their website promotes the free distribution of music. With our law enforcement officers setting such a poor example for the citizens and children, how can we expect those same people to respect the law when it comes knocking at their door?

Nah .. just run it through pornolize ..

It's the www.pornolize.com.