weeklyworldnews.com · Domains

Re:Not by walking by Vancorps · 2004-03-30 16:51 · Score: 4, Funny · on How Will We Get Around Near-Future Earth?

Or maybe we can be like China and ban walking and force everyone to run!

Solve any congestion problems and improve the health of citizens at the same time. Seems like a great idea to me

Those Chinese! by vivin · 2004-03-29 11:44 · Score: 1 · on China Blocks Typepad, Prompts Weblog Blackout

Re:What?! by fbform · 2004-03-23 05:21 · Score: 2, Interesting · on The Unhappy World of IT Professionals

Its a documented (Swedish study I can't remember) mediacl fact that working with stupid people raises your blood pressure, and causes heart attacks.

This is what the parent is talking about:
WORKING WITH IDIOTS CAN KILL YOU

Re:Not just court rooms by Scrameustache · 2004-01-31 10:17 · Score: 4, Funny · on Digital Camera Image Verification

I'm willing to be that one of the first customers for this software is the tabloid newspapers/magazines.

Time to sell you Weekly World News stock!

I fear the days of Bat Boy and "face of satan in 'x'" are coming to an end : (

CowboyNeal by DumbWhiteGuy777 · 2003-12-14 06:53 · Score: 1 · on Saddam Hussein Arrested

CowboyNeal AKA Osama and Saddam's love-child.

Article proclaiming it

Link to proof of new ties between Saddam and Osama by Anonymous+Pundit · 2003-12-14 06:28 · Score: 1 · on Saddam Hussein Arrested

But I thought Saddam and Osama were like.. you know.. an item.

You are more correct than you know. Material that recently came to light showing Saddam and Osama are now intimately involved was published earlier this fall in an obscure periodical.

I have the issue and the photographs are incredible.

sheeesssh... by grub · 2003-12-10 10:19 · Score: 5, Funny · on Kermit Alive and Well on the Space Station

Kermit Alive and Well on the Space Station

This place is starting to sound like the Weekly World News.
"Archie disappears, Veronica suspect! Gopher dug the hole far aWAIS!"

I want my WWN! by SexyKellyOsbourne · 2003-11-06 16:41 · Score: 2, Funny · on McDonald's Denies Deal With iTunes

If Slashdot is going to start posting erroneous stories from tabloids such as the New York Post, they should instead post stories from the Weekly World News. I don't believe what a newspaper says unless it has BatBoy endorsing it!

New today: litterboxes for humans!

http://www.weeklyworldnews.com/news/index.cfm

Re:Tin foil hat! by darien · 2003-10-28 23:20 · Score: 1 · on X17 Solar Flare Sends 2B Tons of Plasma at Earth

Remember the solar storm of aprox 1859?

If you do, these people would love to hear from you.

Re:Shark Attacks! by Fjornir · 2003-09-29 23:56 · Score: 2, Funny · on Electricity Apocalypse Soon?

I remember the Weekly World News reporting on this matter. It turns out the whole thing was a plot by Castro, using trained attack-sharks to decrease our national morale.

But that aside, the shark attack rates were definately higher -- I know because I spent the summer SCUBA diving in Kailua-Kona. The exceptionally low rate of shark attacks overall means that it wasn't very statistically significant, but.. 01 was definately a bumper year for these...

National Inquirer is overrated by Anonymous Coward · 2003-09-17 13:12 · Score: 0 · on Astronomers Upset About Asteroid Panic

Oops! Shouldn't have posted this... now the National Inquirer will have fodder to run with this overly-used story for another 10 years. ;)

That's the problem with the National Inquirer: they keep rehasing old news.

For timely and insightful coverage of the day's most pressing issues, you need to read the World Weekly News. Click here for an example of current events.

Re:Position filled by The+trees · 2003-09-09 04:53 · Score: 1 · on Co-founder Joy to leave Sun

I think you're looking for Ed Anger, but he's already working for the Weekly World News.

Tabloid Journalism by redwolfoz · 2003-08-27 15:43 · Score: 1 · on UK to Put Monitors in Every Car?

It's worth noting that the fish wrap this article appeared in a tabloid owned by Rupert Murdoch, a man whose publications are not known for their in-depth reporting skills. The Sun is only slightly more fact based than, that bastion of journalistic integrity, the Weekly World News .

The Sun? C'mon! by Ridgelift · 2003-08-26 02:44 · Score: 1 · on UK to Put Monitors in Every Car?

"The Sun" is purely a troll publication, just looking to spark controversy. At least let's discuss from a reliable publication, like "The Enquirer" or "The Weekly World News". Better yet, how about this one!

Why are people worried about this? by Sir+Rhosys · 2003-08-26 02:40 · Score: 1 · on UK to Put Monitors in Every Car?

When there are 3 "terrah-rists" forming a boy band right beneath our collective noses?

Saddam, Osama, and Kim form killer boy band... TORTURE.

I can't wait until the Onion becomes a major news source for Slashdot.

Very sensational! by flicken · 2003-08-18 14:45 · Score: 4, Funny · on Russia Plans Martian Nuclear Station

The BBC is reporting this? Wow, from the title, i would have thought that it would come from one of these fine sources.

Patently untrue! by toothfish · 2003-08-17 22:18 · Score: 1 · on The State of the Game Console Wars

I have seen the

Gaming is now a 23.2 Zillion dollar industry in the United States alone

figure corroborated in other reputable news sources.

Re:Duh by Txiasaeia · 2003-07-27 17:06 · Score: 1 · on Microbes for Bioremediation

Or read the paper...

"That boy's heed is the size of Sputnik!"

The plot thickens... by YeOldeGnurd · 2003-07-11 08:07 · Score: 1 · on USS Ronald Reagan Commissioning Tomorrow

I read a year ago when someone asked Barbara Bush if she had told him that one of their children had died.

Barbara and Ronnie had kids together? Why haven't I read this in the Weekly World News?

Re:No more car tinkering... by dougmc · 2003-06-15 07:12 · Score: 1 · on 42-Volt Autos

As you apply higher voltage to your skin, its resistance will decrease very rapidly

Not rapidly enough. Jamming electrodes through your skin, into the muscle underneath might do it (bypassing the resistance of the skin and going right into the meat underneath) but if the skin is involved, 48 volts isn't going to be enough.

And yes, 48V can kill you.

Yes, it can. Take two metal nails, attach a wire to each one and connect to a 48 volt battery. Then jam each nail into your chest deep enough (several inches) so one is on either side of your heart. This will probably kill you.

Anything less will have a very hard time killing you. Can you give me a single verified incident where somebody was killed by an electrical shock of less than 50 volts? Cases where somebody drove electrodes into their flesh (bypassing the skin entirely) would be interesting, but they're not really what I'm looking for.

Google (and whatever else you want, but I don't think The Weekly World News is a very reliable source) is at your disposal. I don't think you'll find a single, credible incident to back up your claim, but who knows?

(And before you start, I do know Ohms law, and I know that the resistance of the human body varies based on voltage.)

Re:The paper is full of bogus assumptions by soulsteal · 2003-06-13 10:35 · Score: 1 · on Widespread Use of Hydrogen May Hurt Ozone Layer

No, The Paper is full of facts! "Man gives birth to baby!" That's a fact!

Re:Wow... by interstellar_donkey · 2003-06-03 16:51 · Score: 1 · on Raiders of the Lost Ark: The Adaptation

Perhaps it has something to do with fark's inability to seperate real news from outragious claims..

Or perhaps it's their terrible use of the news flash. You know it's a sad day when one of the dozens of articles on fark are actually real and newsworthy, and then it's confirmed with slashdot picks it up.

(note, all of the above taken from fark under the guise of 'information')

Re:NO ONE with ANY sense trusts INDYMEDIA by Bold+Marauder · 2003-05-15 09:02 · Score: 1 · on DVRs for Cop Cars

these people often take items from "news of the weird", etc and put their own spin on them; but I don't feel like sifting through all of the bigfoot and elvis stories to get to the one story that I could have more easily read by surfing to fullcoverage.yahoo.com Just the same way, I feel that sifting through all of the anti-corporate hysteria on indymedia is less productive than simply reading the op-eds on cnn.com at least cnn hasn't had an expose done on it on a major news channel!

com.com by daVinci1980 · 2003-05-08 12:40 · Score: 4, Funny · on Windows Security Through Annoyances?

You *might* disbelieve the article because it comes from news.com.com, but I personally find them to be the highest caliber of news organization.

Right up there with the LA Times, The National Enquirer, and the Weekly World News.

Bunker busting missiles you say? by Fizzl · 2003-04-24 19:54 · Score: 1 · on Bombing the Moon for Water

*shifts eyes in a suspicious manner*

Bunker busting missiles you say? by Fizzl · 2003-04-24 19:54 · Score: 1 · on Bombing the Moon for Water

*shifts eyes in a suspicious manner*

Bunker busting missiles you say? by Fizzl · 2003-04-24 19:54 · Score: 1 · on Bombing the Moon for Water

*shifts eyes in a suspicious manner*

Bunker busting missiles you say? by Fizzl · 2003-04-24 19:54 · Score: 1 · on Bombing the Moon for Water

*shifts eyes in a suspicious manner*

WWN already covered this! by Anonymous Coward · 2003-04-24 09:06 · Score: 0 · on Bombing the Moon for Water

Those of you who rely on the "mainstream" media sources alone aren't getting the full story. The Weekly World News already reported that the Russians have been planning this for a long time!

Re:This "MIght" be for real by Anonymous Coward · 2003-04-17 15:25 · Score: 0 · on "Time-Traveler" Busted For Insider Trading

Idiot...the story is a joke, originally posted on a satirical web site. Now, if the U.S. government, for example, thought there were any truth to this idiocy, we wouldn't be reading about it on Slashdot now, would we?

By the way, the name is "Stephen Hawking", not Hawkins, you dolt. It's ironic that you feel the need to explain that he's a "super genius physicist" when you can't even spell his name.

This just goes to show that the web is a great tool for exposing stupidity, gullibility and humourlessness in an alarming number of people. Just be thankful you weren't alive during the "War of the Worlds" hoax...probably would've killed yourself to avoid living under the rule of Martian invaders.

Of course, if you still persist in believing this nonsense, why not head over to original source of the story and check out such gems of insightful journalism as:

"My Wife Wants A Sex Change For Our Anniversary!"
"What Are The Voices In My Head Trying To Say?"
"America Should be A Bad-Ass Cowboy"

And here's something for you to ponder: assuming time travel is possible and will be invented/discovered at some point in the future, where are all the tourists from future eras? Think about it.

m/Weekly World News/ ? : '!' : '?' by phyxeld · 2003-04-17 10:18 · Score: 5, Informative · on "Time-Traveler" Busted For Insider Trading

Can anyone explain to me how this story got so big? I've had a few people send me links, and I've seen it on a few sites... Now slashdot even has it! I mean, WHAT THE FUCK?

It's the WEEKLY WORLD NEWS, people!
(Yes, the tabliod refered to as "The Paper" in So I Married An Axe Murderer)

Now that yahoo is syndicating them, there are lots of bullshit stories filled into the yahoo news templates. What makes this one so special that it gets on slashdot? And how many people forwarding it don't actually realize it's from the WWN? I mean, this is the publication that brought us Bat Boy , and the Clinton's Alien Baby stories. And now some crap about a time traveler makes slashdot?

It makes no sense.

m/Weekly World News/ ? : '!' : '?' by phyxeld · 2003-04-17 10:18 · Score: 5, Informative · on "Time-Traveler" Busted For Insider Trading

Can anyone explain to me how this story got so big? I've had a few people send me links, and I've seen it on a few sites... Now slashdot even has it! I mean, WHAT THE FUCK?

It's the WEEKLY WORLD NEWS, people!
(Yes, the tabliod refered to as "The Paper" in So I Married An Axe Murderer)

Now that yahoo is syndicating them, there are lots of bullshit stories filled into the yahoo news templates. What makes this one so special that it gets on slashdot? And how many people forwarding it don't actually realize it's from the WWN? I mean, this is the publication that brought us Bat Boy , and the Clinton's Alien Baby stories. And now some crap about a time traveler makes slashdot?

It makes no sense.

Did anyone actually look at the source? by dcormier · 2003-04-17 08:33 · Score: 1 · on "Time-Traveler" Busted For Insider Trading

It's from the Weekly World News. The publication that brings us such news as, "Bat Boy Fights In Iraq!" And, "Satan Escapes From Hell!" Come on, people.