Slashdot Mirror


Windows 'Longhorn' Kicks Off (On Paper)

gdeciantis writes: "NeoWin.net posted an article which outlines some of the new features that are currently planned for the the next version of Windows (codenamed Longhorn). With new features like seamless content transfer across devices, it looks like Longhorn will not just be Windows XP SE."

30 of 432 comments (clear)

  1. Oh joy. by Kenja · · Score: 5, Funny

    I guess this means we get to see another video clip of the Microsoft CEO stamping around on stage screaming. This time in a cowboy hat and boots of course. I wonder if they'll hand out temp tattoos that look like cow brands with the MS logo?

    --

    "Have you ever thought about just turning off the TV, sitting down with your kids, and hitting them?"
    1. Re:Oh joy. by bonzoesc · · Score: 2, Funny

      As long as he's trying to round up Developers, Developers, Developers, Developers, Developers, Developers, Developers, Developers, I LOOOOVE THIS COMPANY! Developers, Developers, Developers...

  2. The much anticipated... by swagr · · Score: 3, Funny

    Notepad upgrade.
    Will we ever see a better text editor come with the os?

    --

    -... --- .-. . -.. ..--..
    1. Re:The much anticipated... by Quill_28 · · Score: 4, Funny

      If they come out with a better notepad wouldn't they be using their monopoly power to crush the competition?

    2. Re:The much anticipated... by x0n · · Score: 5, Funny

      Ah, you know about the secret .LOG function too? Open notepad, make the first line .LOG -- save it, and voila, everytime you open it, it inserts a timestamp! beat that EMACS in under 85 lines of lisp!

      - Ois

      --

      PGP KeyId: 0x08D63965
    3. Re:The much anticipated... by DaCool42 · · Score: 2, Funny

      notepad->wordpad->msword

      cat->vi->vim

      --

      ----
      All of whose base are belong to the what-now?
  3. Note the softened code name... by GeneralEmergency · · Score: 4, Funny


    ..No more code names like HailStorm for these guys. Expect names like PuppyTail, SnuggleBear and ComfyHat from now on.

    --
    "A microprocessor... is a terrible thing to waste." --
    GeneralEmergency
    1. Re:Note the softened code name... by The+Wooden+Badger · · Score: 1, Funny

      I'd even expect Mr. Bill to throw in a penguin reference in one of the codenames to 'win' over the linux crowd. Of course if that happens, Linus should take him to court a la M$ vs. Lindows.

      --
      Heroscape, it's like legos combined with anachronistic wargames.
    2. Re:Note the softened code name... by GTRacer · · Score: 4, Funny
      Well, actually, I bet in some cases, the last thing going through your mind is about eight feet worth of sharp pointy horns...

      GTRacer
      - ...or maybe elsewhere...

      --
      Defending IP by destroying access to it? That makes sense, RIAA/MPAA. Go to the corner until you can play nice!
  4. Features I'd like to see in the next Windows by Ubergrendle · · Score: 5, Funny

    - Everything configurable via the command line for power users
    - Non-integrated browser
    - Non-integrated media player
    - Drivers for USB 2.0, Bluetooth, and Firewire
    - 100% documented APIs
    - No WPA

    I would also like the ability to fly, bend metal objects with my mind, and understand women.

    --
    John Maynard Keynes: "When the facts change, I change my mind. What do you do?"
    1. Re:Features I'd like to see in the next Windows by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      > - No WPA

      But why would anyone want to get rid of the Works Progress Administration? It was the best part of the New Deal...

    2. Re:Features I'd like to see in the next Windows by Aiku1337 · · Score: 1, Funny

      Dude, I thought XP already gives users the ability to fly. Thats one down, at least.

    3. Re:Features I'd like to see in the next Windows by kzinti · · Score: 5, Funny
      I would also like the ability to fly, bend metal objects with my mind, and understand women.

      To bastardize the words of the late great Douglas Adams:

      There is a theory which states that if men ever succeed in understanding women, they will instantly disappear and be replaced with something even more bizarre inexplicable.

      There is another theory which states that this has already happened.

      --Jim
    4. Re:Features I'd like to see in the next Windows by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      Gopher will rise again!

  5. As a Texas A & M University graduate by krails · · Score: 4, Funny

    And as an Aggie, I think it's damn funny that they'd call it "Longhorn". Guess I'll have to name my test machine I install it on "Bevo" and rename my main Linux server "Beatthehellouttatu". =)

    Gig 'em!

  6. Re:A Windows fan site? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0, Funny

    They have a list of all of the known security vulnerabilities in Windows. Funny how I never see any articles like that here.

    Here's one for OpenBSD

  7. Re:Using 3D API's for 2D? by geekoid · · Score: 3, Funny

    No, it means there going to use your cards 3d channel for non 3d tasks. This should really suck when you need that channel for other things, like 3d.

    --
    The Kruger Dunning explains most post on /. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dunning%E2%80%93Kruger_effect
  8. Re:FYI: Windows "Longhorn" Platform Goals by mickwd · · Score: 5, Funny
    "...predictable power button behaviour..."

    ????

    You mean like a power button that turns the power on, and then off again ?

    Us open-source folks had better give up now - there's no way we can catch up with advances like this...

  9. Re:Using 3D API's for 2D? by Cutriss · · Score: 3, Funny

    Windows Longhorn will expose new APIs for accelerated 2D drawing. These new APIs will not use existing GDI acceleration but will instead use the Microsoft Direct3D® DDI. New applications, therefore, will make use of the 3D pipeline of the graphics adapter for their 2D / productivity graphics requirements.

    Microsoft Chrome, anyone?

    --
    "Mod, mod, mod...and another troll bites the dust."
  10. Re:FYI: Windows "Longhorn" Platform Goals by ZaneMcAuley · · Score: 3, Funny

    You missed one :D

    - To make more money.

    --
    ----- Whats wrong with this picture? http://www.revoh.org:1234/whatswrong
  11. Re:It's the devil i tell you! The devil! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

    By breaking this seal, you agree to the following terms and conditions:

    1. Your first born child belongs to us. You agree to pay all shipping and handling charges in sending child to us, as well as paying ongoing maintenance fees for said child.

    2. You agree to make a weekly blood sacrifice of an Open Source developer using your PC as an altar. Failure to comply will result in the loss of one limb.

    3. You agree not to enage in Open Source development or other intellectual property destroying activities, which we will not define here, but we'll recognize it when we see it. Failure to comply will result in the loss of another limb.

    4. Your soul, of course, belongs to us.

    5. WE STILL DON'T PROVIDE ANY DAMN WARRANTY!!!

  12. Re:Shot in the Dark Guess by bnenning · · Score: 5, Funny
    but it may have something to do with integrating the Digital Rights Management scheme further, so that ordinary users cannot rip CDs


    As an Apple shareholder, I strongly encourage Microsoft to do this.

    --
    How to solve most of our problems: 1.Lots of nuclear plants. 2.Cure aging.
  13. Re:FYI: Windows "Longhorn" Platform Goals by Colz+Grigor · · Score: 5, Funny

    No, this means that Windows Longhorn will predict when the user really wanted to hit the power button and will turn off instantly.

    The heuristics for determining shutdown times have been improving since Windows 3.1. Remember the advent of the Blue Screen of Death in NT 4.0? That was really just a message telling the user "we think it's time for you to shut off the computer".

    ::Colz Grigor

  14. Longhorn? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

    Sounds like more Microsoft bull.

  15. Re:Longhorns trademark? by Kredal · · Score: 3, Funny

    The first line was correct... let's rewrite that, shall we?

    Wouldn't stand in court
    It's just a project codename
    Not the product name

    There, doesn't that look better?

    --
    Whoever stated that signature sizes should be limited to one hundred and twenty characters can just go ahead and kiss my
  16. Nice name by DotComVictim · · Score: 5, Funny

    I think it's quite funny that the codename "longhorn" refers to the beetle family, cerambycidae, well known pests of forests and ornamental plants. The larvae consist of worms that bore into the host, making it more susceptible to future infestation and disease.

    The analogy between this and the Windows operating system invasion of the corporate desktop is quite amusing.

  17. Uh Oh by kick_in_the_eye · · Score: 5, Funny

    Don't confuse this with the new Lindows Wonghorn release.

  18. How appropriately named. by MongooseCN · · Score: 5, Funny

    Bend over so MS can give you the Longhorn..

  19. Longhorn? by r_j_prahad · · Score: 3, Funny

    What a cheesey sounding name.

  20. trolling by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny

    flaming grits, M$, linux, hope this fails,BSD, conspiracy, and f you all because my obscure ___ is better.