Both Tea And No Tea - Updated Hitchhiker's Game

THAT game by AKAImBatman · 2004-09-01 04:53 · Score: 5, Funny

# Look around

There's nothing to see. You're lying on your back.

# Get up

I don't understand.

# Get out of bed

You get out of bed.

# Look around

You see nothing. The lights are off. ...

Your house is demolished by a bulldozer. You have died. Would you like to play again? (y/n)

I really hate that game. Feel free to frustrate yourself here.

--
Javascript + Nintendo DSi = DSiCade

Re:THAT game by LiquidShaneo · 2004-09-01 05:00 · Score: 2, Interesting

That was one thing that really frustrated me about the game was that you had to play out things in a certain sequence and in a certain time frame otherwise you'd die or something nasty would happen to you. I found myself saving the game often and reloading it until I got it right. It got old pretty quick. :/ Nothing like the Zork games I played... Shane
Re:THAT game by neurojab · 2004-09-01 05:24 · Score: 3, Informative

>You see nothing. The lights are off. ...

Try turning on the light.
Re:THAT game by einTier · 2004-09-01 07:08 · Score: 3, Funny

There were also lots of unintiutive puzzles, and lots of things that made sense only if you had read the book. Don't forget that the game doesn't exactly follow the book, so reading it will confuse the game for you just as much as if you hadn't read it at all -- just in a different way.
Then there's the problem with puzzles that require grabbing non-evident things (the dust from under the bed) at the beginning of the game and needing them near the end -- with no way to go back and get them of course, because the house and Earth has been destroyed.
After typing all that, I realize it's the perfect Hitchhiker's Guide game.

--
-------------------------------------------------- $665.95 -- retail price of the beast.
Re:THAT game by robertjw · 2004-09-01 08:06 · Score: 2, Funny

Ahhh... that brings back memories.

When I was in highschool during the late 80s (God I'm old) I wrote a text adventure (in basic - shudder) for my computer class. At the time, Oliver North was on trial, so I decided to base it on the iran-contra affair.

Basically you could wander around a house and do some basic things. I added a random timeout, so after a few turns it came up with:

Three men with machine guns burst into the room!
You are dead!
Never double-cross the Iranians

I got an A.

--
Find coupons in Greeley

Obligatory Quote - The Babel Fish by romper · 2004-09-01 04:53 · Score: 4, Funny

No, not this fish.

The Babel fish is small, yellow, leechlike, and probably the oddest thing in the Universe. It feeds on brainwave energy received not from its own carrier but from those around it. It absorbs all unconscious mental frequencies from this brainwave energy to nourish itself with. It then excretes into the mind of its carrier a telepathic matrix formed by combining the conscious thought frequencies with nerve signals picked up from the speech centers of the brain which has supplied them. The practical upshot of all this is that if you stick a Babel fish in your ear you can instantly understand anything said to you in any form of language. The speech patterns you actually hear decode the brainwave matrix which has been fed into your mind by your Babel fish.
Now it is such a bizarrely improbable coincidence that anything so mind-bogglingly useful could have evolved purely by chance that some thinkers have chosen to see it as a final and clinching proof of the NON-existence of God.

The argument goes like this:

`I refuse to prove that I exist,' says God, `for proof denies faith, and without faith I am nothing.'
`But,' says Man, `The Babel fish is a dead giveaway, isn't it? It could not have evolved by chance. It proves you exist, and so therefore, by your own arguments, you don't. QED.'
`Oh dear,' says God, `I hadn't thought of that,' and promptly disappears in a puff of logic.
`Oh, that was easy,' says Man, and for an encore goes on to prove that black is white and gets himself killed on the next zebra crossing.

Most leading theologians claim that this argument is a load of dingo's kidneys, but that didn't stop Oolon Colluphid making a small fortune when he used it as the central theme of his best-selling book, "Well, That about Wraps It Up for God."

Meanwhile, the poor Babel fish, by effectively removing all barriers to communication between different races and cultures, has caused more and bloodier wars than anything else in the history of creation.

--
Right is wrong when left is right.

Re:Obligatory Quote - The Babel Fish by Marxist+Hacker+42 · 2004-09-01 05:49 · Score: 2, Informative

So humans could not have possibly evolved? I know quite a few biologists who would argue that point.

We're talking about arguing with creationists, not biologists. Creationists do indeed claim that human beings were created from mud, not monkeys (well, dust anyway, but in honor of DNA, mud alliterates better). And agreed- to any *thinking* Christian, God is not dependent on faith- but most creation fundamentalists only memorize the 30 or so verses that their Health & Wealth preacher preaches on and ignore the rest of the Bible anyway, so you're pretty safe on not running into that quote from Acts that is so close to all the communism stuff in Acts 4 & 5.

And agreed- it's a completely spurious argument, but so is creationism to begin with.

--
SJW: a person who perceives an injustice, and while correcting it, commits a greater injustice.
Re:Obligatory Quote - The Babel Fish by Matthias+Wiesmann · 2004-09-01 06:05 · Score: 5, Funny

Meanwhile, the poor Babel fish, by effectively removing all barriers to communication between different races and cultures, has caused more and bloodier wars than anything else in the history of creation.
Maybe this explains the poor quality of the other fish, it is not that machine translation does not work, but a valiant effort to prevent wars caused by better understanding.
Re:Obligatory Quote - The Babel Fish by Tackhead · 2004-09-01 06:40 · Score: 4, Funny

> Replace "Babelfish" with "human" the next time you're arguing with a creationist though, and watch their head explode.
We're small and leechlike, some of us are yellowish, we may be the oddest thing in the Universe, but there's no way you're slipping something like "mind-bogglingly useful" past me. Nuh-uh.
Re:Obligatory Quote - The Babel Fish by xgamer04 · 2004-09-01 07:48 · Score: 3, Insightful

Maybe you missed the memo, but creationism and evolutionism are not necessarily mutually exclusive. There do exist Christians/Jews/Muslims/etc who believe a mix of both.

--
When you look at the state of the world, how can you not become a radical, liberal anarchist?
Re:Obligatory Quote - The Babel Fish by Marxist+Hacker+42 · 2004-09-01 08:00 · Score: 2, Interesting

Absolutely- and I'm one of them. DNA however was obviously attacking a very narrowly defined breed of believers in this- Original Protestants, the kind who still believe in Sola Scriptura, Sola Fide, Sola Gratia. For these people there will never be a marriage between the idea that people came from Apes and their 6000-year-old world described in the literal scriptures. And they ain't so sure about Jews or Muslims who never accepted Christ as God either. Think Rev. Phelps of Kansas City style Christians. See explaination of how the straw man works above.

--
SJW: a person who perceives an injustice, and while correcting it, commits a greater injustice.
Re:Obligatory Quote - The Babel Fish by darkmeridian · 2004-09-01 14:22 · Score: 2, Funny

No humans can be "Mind-Bogginglingly useful?"

I disagree. http://www.nportman.com/

--
A NYC lawyer blogs. http://www.chuangblog.com/
Re:Obligatory Quote - The Babel Fish by king-manic · 2004-09-01 14:49 · Score: 2, Informative

Let us break down your evidence:

1-
Sure I've heard it's proof, but I've also seen proof that your evidence is highly incorrect.

Creationists (most) place the age of the earth at 6000- 8000 years old. This derived from calculating dates from the bible. (Chinese history goes back to 6000 bc so 8000 might be possible. Except most geological techniques and research into the age of earth place it at 4.6 billion years old. evidence here: age of earth

6000-8000 years doesn't give the mechanism for evolution (mutation) to work. however 4.6 billion give it ample time.

Creationism hold that while the mechanism for evolution (mutation/selection) can be observed now and they cannot deny any evidence that it happens and is observable, they claim simply that our current diversity is not the result of that and they label it micro evolution. They deny evolution happens by reclassing their argument to ignore all current proof. (i.e. if I have a population of people, and I kill everyone with 10 fingers and 10 toes at their 14 birthday, eventually only people with more or less toes and fingers will be around). This is perhaps their weakest argument. To say that X happens. and there is evidence X happens in the past. Then to say the past only extended to yesterday, and thus there is no time for x to happen and thus all evidence of X happening is fake, is a pretty dumb argument.

there's more but I'll move on to your next statement

2-Creationism makes more logical sense than does evolution

No, for the above reason, creationism takes more assumptions, and more unsupported assumptions. This logically, there is more support for evolution and thus evolution is our current theory.

3-but you do have to believe that there is a God for it to be proven

You must assume a god (or aliens or what ever) to have creationism. But evolution happens now, and stands on its own.

4-Either way, they're both theories at best.

Poor American education system victim. A scientific theory isn't just a "theory". A scientific theory is the current working model of a certain observed phenomenon. It is the current model because it is well supported. There may be competing theories and they will remain competing until one or the other is disproved. The community may favor one or the other.

A theory had passed the scrutiny of those reviewing it. And it has some substantial proof behind it. Theories that are accepted are rarely proven wholly wrong but are instead amended. Newton's theory of gravity(the equations) is not wrong, but only right in the local parameter set. that is at very large scales and very small scale it's off. but Einstein's general relativity solved a few of these problems while Hawking et al is trying to iron out the remaining anomalous behaviors at certain levels.

Creationism is not a scientific theory. it has not been peer reviewed its evidence is whole theological/rationalization. At best, creationist is a poorly supported idea from a certain group of individuals. At worst evolution is our best current working model of how life came into it's current diversity. Ammendments will be made as evidence comes to light.

PS. I am a devout Christian. My faith does not conflict with evolution.some may use evolution against faith but they two integrate nicly. Science is a outward growth of theological studies. It is studing gods work.

--
"There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy."
Re:Obligatory Quote - The Babel Fish by singleantler · 2004-09-01 22:08 · Score: 2, Interesting

Peter Jones was the voice and unfortunately he died recently. One of his friends will be the new voice of the guide and is a pretty close match. He also voiced the guide in the radio series, which is worth tracking down if you like his voice. As with each version of HHG the radio series is rather different from the books and TV show.

When all of our computers can talk like Peter Jones, the world will be a better place.

--
"What if they're using IE?" "I've dumbed Mozilla down to cope with it." - BOFH

Another generation of frustration by jandrese · 2004-09-01 04:54 · Score: 5, Interesting

Alright, now a whole new generation can get frustrated and give up on this game before making it a tenth of the way through. Seriously, this was probably the most annoying Infocom game ever published, and I doubt I would have ever made it through without a guide I found on the net years later. There were so many ways to kill yourself in this game that you basically had to write out a script of actions that you must follow precisely in order to survive. Later on in the game it does branch out, but it is very easy to overlook a tiny detail and totally screw yourself over later in the game. The whole thing was an exercise in frustration for most players, especially ones who hadn't read the books or heard the radio broadcasts for several years.

If they're really going to redo the game, I hope they rework some of the more obtuse puzzles to make them a little less frustrating to the general populace.

--

I read the internet for the articles.

Re:Another generation of frustration by ackthpt · 2004-09-01 05:05 · Score: 2, Interesting

If you think that game was frustrating, you should have tried his Bureacracy game. It took me a while to figure out what a gaol was, but it's certainly another pleaseantly nutty diversion.

--

A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
Re:Another generation of frustration by g_adams27 · 2004-09-01 05:12 · Score: 4, Informative

> Seriously, this was probably the most annoying Infocom game ever published
Oh, I don't know about that. I still don't follow the logic behind the 2-piles-of-cubes puzzle in Spellbreaker. And have you tried "Suspect"? Man!
Well, Ok, you're right about the first 1/3 of HHGTTG. If you haven't gotten everything you need off Earth before it blows up, then you're in trouble (although if you failed to feed the dog, there is a second chance for you later in the game!). And if you don't get the Babel fish before you're hauled off to the poetry slam, then too bad for you.
But once you make it to the Heart of Gold, you're pretty much free to explore without time constraints. Yes, you can "die" in many of the scenarios you'll teleport to with the Improbability Drive, but all that does is send you back to the H.O.G. Then you just try it again.
Best Puzzle: "You can't see anything, smell anything, taste anything, or feel anything..." (etc.) Brilliant. :-)
Worst Puzzle: "put junk mail on satchel". Ok, maybe the three previous steps for getting the fish were somewhat logical, but the "confuse-the-upper-half-of-the-room-robot" step was ridiculous!
Re:Another generation of frustration by Ford+Prefect · 2004-09-01 05:15 · Score: 5, Interesting

(NB: Yes, I'm the article submitter. Go me!)

If they're really going to redo the game, I hope they rework some of the more obtuse puzzles to make them a little less frustrating to the general populace.

They could easily have destroyed the game, but somehow it didn't. When the babel-fish twanged off into the wrong place for the umpteen billionth time, or you didn't know how to get the Vogon captain to recite the second verse of his magnum opus, it was your fault. It truly showed what it was like to be Arthur Dent, with what appeared to be the entire universe ganging up against him for some utterly arbitrary reason...

I originally discovered an illicit copy of the game many years ago on a bunch of old floppy disks being thrown out of a cupboard at my father's workplace. I never knew of its official Douglas Adams roots until years later, but from playing it I knew it was something special. I managed to get a lot of the way through - the version I had found didn't have any hints, which I suppose was quite impressive. More recently, a friend lent me another, um, copy which did have hints, and I finally got round to finishing it.

Annoying ending, but an excellent, if mind-breakingly difficult, game. :-)

--
Tedious Bloggy Stuff - hooray?
Re:Another generation of frustration by tuffy · 2004-09-01 05:19 · Score: 5, Insightful

Worst Puzzle: "put junk mail on satchel". Ok, maybe the three previous steps for getting the fish were somewhat logical, but the "confuse-the-upper-half-of-the-room-robot" step was ridiculous!

I was able to deduce the babel fish puzzle back when the game first came out. Once one remembers the last item the Rube Goldberg-style sequence stops at, it's not hard to figure out what part of your limited inventory to use next.
But "enjoy poetry" was one thing I never figured out until I found a guide to the game.

--
Ita erat quando hic adveni.
Re:Another generation of frustration by ceswiedler · 2004-09-01 05:39 · Score: 2, Interesting

Absoutely great game. I figured out the "see nothing, taste nothing..." one on my own, most of the others I had to get some help on. The babel fish, the intelligent door (most of the puzzles actually) were too much for me (or anyway I was too impatient) as a 8-year old kid.

How do you get by not feeding the dog? As I remember, you end up in someone's brain, with synapses all around. Could you get out of that?

If early in the game you had typed "turn on ligt", the game responded "I don't know what a ligt is." Then later, it describes that two alien races are sitting down to a truce after a million years of war. Through a freak wormhole, the words "turn on ligt" are heard, which happens to be the worst insult ever to one of the alien races. They fight each other for another million years, but eventually they realize that it was an Earthling who said it, and they amass a fleet to destroy Earth.

No, it's not the Vogons, it's a race of microscopic (to our eyes) aliens. They appear, and are eaten by a dog outside a pub five minutes before the Vogons actually do destroy Earth.

Unless you feed the dog your ham sandwich.
Re:Another generation of frustration by tuffy · 2004-09-01 05:48 · Score: 2, Informative

How do you get by not feeding the dog? As I remember, you end up in someone's brain, with synapses all around. Could you get out of that?

I think you get a second chance by having Ford feed the dog. Eventually you (as Arthur Dent) wind up in your own mazelike brain. By removing your common sense, you'll be able to take tea and no tea at the same time (since it won't be able to say you can't do that).

--
Ita erat quando hic adveni.
Re:Another generation of frustration by Mondoz · 2004-09-01 06:02 · Score: 4, Funny

I remember a comic in one of the old Infocom newsletters showing a guy at his PC, with the devil standing next to him.
The devil is holding a contract in one hand, and he says "Still haven't gotten the bable fish, eh?"

--
/sig
Re:Another generation of frustration by FuzzyBad-Mofo · 2004-09-01 06:18 · Score: 2, Informative

Ah yes, the Ravenous Bug-Blatter Beast of Traal. A mindboggingly stupid animal, it assumes that if you can't see it, it can't see you - daft as a bush, but very, very ravenous.
Re:Another generation of frustration by Iffy+Bonzoolie · 2004-09-01 07:57 · Score: 2, Informative

Read all the infocom newsletters at http://infodoc.plover.net/nzt/!

or http://www.ifarchive.org/indexes/if-archiveXinfoco mXNZT+TSL.html

They even include the fan comics they published...

-If

--
Run a pencil-and-paper RPG campaign with your far-off friends: Gametable!
Re:Another generation of frustration by DunbarTheInept · 2004-09-01 08:13 · Score: 3, Interesting

In the copy of the game I played way back when (Commodore 64), the text description of the events surrounding the Babelfish machine made it impossible to logically figure out how to solve the puzzle. The problem was that the panel out of which the floor cleaning robot emerged was described incorrectly as being "by" the floor, which makes you think it's on the wall, when it is actually "IN" the floor, like a trapdoor. This small difference made it impossible to put the satchel where it belonged. I understood that blocking the panel was a good idea, but the thing is, I kept trying to block the panel by putting things "in front of", or "next to" the panel when I was supposed to be putting them "on top of" the panel - all of this was because the description put the panel in the wall instead of in the floor. And the nature of the error messages coming back never help inform you as to the nature of the misunderstanding - that the problem was with the prepositional phrase, not the rest of the command.

So I eventually broke down and looked at a hint book. When I found out what the solution was, I got really mad. The game had stymied me due to what was a simple one-word error in one of the descritptions.

The really annoying thing I found about the game, though, came later on. On the Heart of Gold, there are a number of different tools with random sounding names. Any attempt to ask the game what the tools look like gave you no information whatsoever, instead just telling you that you don't know what they do. Therefore there is no way to tell what to do with them, and no way to form any visual picture as to what these objects actually are. But one of them was necessary to "remove the common sense portion of my brain", and there was no way at all to clue you in as to (1) that such a task was even possible, and (2) that one of the unknown random tools laying around is related to this task in some way.

That game was the funniest text adventure ever made, but it was also the least playable one ever made. It sucked as a game. It was great as a good read if you use the hint book.

--
Don't label something "offtopic" unless you know the topic well enough to tell what's on topic.
Re:Another generation of frustration by Jeremy+Erwin · 2004-09-01 10:32 · Score: 3, Informative

Therefore there is no way to tell what to do with them, and no way to form any visual picture as to what these objects actually are. But one of them was necessary to "remove the common sense portion of my brain", and there was no way at all to clue you in as to (1) that such a task was even possible, and (2) that one of the unknown random tools laying around is related to this task in some way.

Odd. I just finish playing it-- and "take common sense" worked fine.

Great News! by CommanderData · 2004-09-01 04:55 · Score: 4, Funny

Now I can finally prove my intelligence to that *$&#@& door on the Heart of Gold so it will open for me!

--
Urge to post... fading... fading... RISING!... fading... fading... gone.

Rod Lord's graphics are fun by Gopal.V · 2004-09-01 04:57 · Score: 3, Interesting

Especially the one with Dolphins on one side and Soldiers (with Guns) on the other ... from blue to dark red .. saying intelligence more <===> less . Also the meringue Margathean planet, the cone headed babel fish and all the other stuff ...

Though I hope the colors look better this time around :)

PS: I run it as a slideshow screensaver

--
Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum videtur

Remember by BlightThePower · 2004-09-01 04:57 · Score: 4, Informative

Pick up the junkmail. I remember this because it was one of the most frustrating moments of my young life when I finally realised where it was needed. Of course I get more frustrated than that on the drive to work every morning alone, but I still remember it.

--
Plays violent online games as: Nerfherder76

Re:Remember by peatbakke · 2004-09-01 05:12 · Score: 3, Informative

You think that's frustrating?

Don't feed the dog a sandwich.

That really blew my stack, about thirty hours later ...
Re:Remember by Otto · 2004-09-01 06:33 · Score: 3, Informative

You think that's frustrating?

Don't feed the dog a sandwich.

That really blew my stack, about thirty hours later ...

That one wasn't actually fatal, as getting eaten by the dog merely thru you back into the DARK prematurely. From the dark, there were 5 possible exits, and if you waited for the one where you became Ford Prefect, you could feed the dog a sandwich in that scenario, and then go do the warship scenario and this time you wouldn't be eaten by the dog.

There were actually only a few unrecoverables, and all of them were very early in the game.
-Get crushed in the house.
-Don't follow Ford's directions and get blown up with Earth.
-Forget to get the junk mail and you could not get the Babel Fish, or try too many times on the Babel Fish Dispenser and it ran out. And then you got killed because you couldn't understand what was being said by the Vogon later.

But once you find the "dark" after being ejected from the Vogon's ship, you're essentially in the clear. Everything else is doable from that point onward, as long as you have your gown and your towel. Dying means that you go back into the "dark", and you can replay any of the failed scenarios by merely waiting until the right moment before exiting the dark.

--
- Give a man a fire and he's warm for a day, but set him on fire and he's warm for the rest of his life.

Game tip: by El_Smack · 2004-09-01 04:58 · Score: 4, Informative

Take the mail from your (Mailbox? Front step?) It will come in very helpful when you need to get a fish in your ear.
Mods: if you don't get this, just ignore it, OK? It's on topic, I swear.

--

There are 01 kinds of cars in the world. The General Lee, and everything else.

The influence of Adams on Internet culture by Nakito · 2004-09-01 04:59 · Score: 4, Interesting

I always liked the fact that AltaVista named their translation service "Babelfish." It would be interesting to catalog other examples of how Adams has left his mark on the Internet.

Been A While by ackthpt · 2004-09-01 05:00 · Score: 4, Insightful

It's been a while, but I don't remember Agrajag being in the HHGG game I played on a C64. I do remember being aboard the Heart of Gold, something to do with the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast, entering my own head, but I don't recall Agrajag being in there. Sounds like it's been expanded a bit.

Certainly has taken a while for the sequel, I don't even wear a digital watch anymore! :-)

--

A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar

Re:Been A While by Mateito · 2004-09-01 05:57 · Score: 2, Insightful

I don't even wear a digital watch anymore!
Suprisingly, that's actually worth an insightful mod.
On reading that I looked at my watch, thought about three watches I own, tried to think about the 20 odd watches my fiances has (one for each pair of shoes, of course), and I think there isn't a full digital watch among them.
Possible exception is an "analogue" watch that I have with a digital module that displays the date or one of two other timezones, depending wher e I'm travelling.

--
Norman Cook's Ode to Sl

wicked.. by radarsat1 · 2004-09-01 05:01 · Score: 3, Insightful

i wish text adventure games would come back. this is going to be great! command-line gaming at its best. hey, i've heard rumours that production levels across the nation dipped visibly when Adventure first came out, is that true?

Re:wicked.. by StalinsNotDead · 2004-09-01 05:15 · Score: 2, Funny

production levels across the nation dipped visibly when Adventure first came out

Kind of like Slashdot?

--
Thanks to the internet, we can now all die alone together! -SomeWoman
Re:wicked.. by UserGoogol · 2004-09-01 05:35 · Score: 4, Funny

As you refresh, you see that there is a new article loaded. "New Star Trek Movie by John Waters." No posts have yet been posted.s

#Click on Star Trek

"Ain't it cool news has reported that John Waters has said at an interview in Entertainment Weekly that he is 'very interested' in making a Star Trek movie." I wouldn't mind at all, says michael.

There are no posts.

#post "frist psot"

You fail it.

While posting that utterly brilliant article, a grue has broken into your parents' basement. He is currently chewing on your leg. An ambulance is headed for your house, but it gets stuck in traffic.

Would you like to restart? (y/n)

--
"Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity." -- Hanlon's Razor

You think the GAME was frustrating? by xmuskrat · 2004-09-01 05:02 · Score: 5, Interesting

You should have bought the hintbook for it. In order to get an obscure clue, you had to highlight it with a special marker. Unfortuantely, there were far more clues then ink in the marker. There was a rumor you could develop the answers with lemonade, and I guess that wasn't a bad idea to try (since if you wanted the answers you had to buy a new hintbook anyway for a new marker...)

--
activestudios web design

Re:You think the GAME was frustrating? by justforaday · 2004-09-01 05:08 · Score: 2, Interesting

I went throught the exact same thing with those damn Invisiclues books...The worst was when you stopped playing a game for a month, only to pick it up again later to find that the hintbook you spent 15 bucks on was now no good...I supposed it's still better than paying $2.99/minute for some telephone hintline though...

--
I'll turn into a supernova and burn up everything. Well I'll turn into a black little hole and you'll turn into string.

Beyond user-friendly... by DeadVulcan · 2004-09-01 05:05 · Score: 4, Funny

"the first game to move beyond being 'user friendly'"... "It's actually 'user insulting' and because it lies to you as well it's also 'user mendacious,'" he said.

Best. Software project. Ever.

What I would have given to work on such a program. I bet they had programmers offering to work for free. Heck, I would have paid them...

"Please, just one printf, one insult, that's all I ask!"

--
Accountability on the heads of the powerful.
Power in the hands of the accountable.

Re:Beyond user-friendly... by blair1q · 2004-09-01 05:39 · Score: 4, Funny

> because it lies to you as well it's also 'user mendacious,

Wait. You mean Windows is based on the HHTTG text-adventure game?

(Ah, just mod me -1 karma whore...)

This game is EVIL!!! by kjones692 · 2004-09-01 05:05 · Score: 4, Funny

I never managed to get past the bit where Ford comes and talks to you, then leaves to go to the pub... but, then again, this game is pretty much representative of all text-based adventure games.

"Get flask"
"You can't get ye flask!"
And you're stuck there wondering why on earth you can't get ye flask...

--

Love the Third Amendment?

Re:This game is EVIL!!! by Deep+Fried+Geekboy · 2004-09-01 05:13 · Score: 4, Informative

The secret is not to take the towel.

--
I'm not wrong. You haven't thought about it hard enough.

Re:Whales and petunias ... by LWATCDR · 2004-09-01 05:06 · Score: 3, Informative

Actually it was the the bowl of petunias that said "No not again".
The Petunias was a soul that kept comming back to after Aruthor Dent kept killed it time and time again.

--
See my blog http://ilovecookes.blogspot.com/ for light hearted technical information.

Best Infocom Game Quote by dcigary · 2004-09-01 05:07 · Score: 5, Funny

..for ME, anyhow...

While playing Zork I, in the caves, I said:

# get leaflet
Picked up leaflet
# get tube of glue
Picked up tube of glue
# glue leaflet to wall
And you must put spinach in your gas tank, too.

Not a nice thing to do to a sleepy 17 year old at 3:30 in the morning.

--
...my Karma ran over your Dogma...

It's not that bad! by ackthpt · 2004-09-01 05:08 · Score: 5, Funny

I'll hand in my nerd ID card if you so deem it necessary, but I for one amd damn tired of anything related to HHGTTG.

Just wear your Joo Janta 200 Super-Chromatic Peril Sensitive Sunglasses until the article goes away.

--

A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar

ob quotation by betelgeuse-4 · 2004-09-01 05:08 · Score: 4, Funny

It is very dark... You are likely to be eaten by a Grue.

--
Decode these

Anyone? by Guano_Jim · 2004-09-01 05:09 · Score: 4, Funny

Anyone have a babelfish translation of the article?

--
3D Printing Tips and Tricks at Zheng3.com

Re:Anyone? by Gaewyn+L+Knight · 2004-09-01 05:34 · Score: 2, Funny

Umm... stick it in your ear! :} Sorry couldn't resist.

--
Telcos have alot of dark fibre in the States. Most people assume that's optical fibre...but it's actually moral fibre.
Re:Anyone? by irokitt · 2004-09-01 06:20 · Score: 2, Interesting

I didn't feel like copying-pasting the entire article, but here's the Slashdot intro, with a few fun steps in between, and then back to Engrish:

Written Ford Prefect falls "To with the series of new radiosenders of Douglas fir Adams' together; ; At leaders of Hitchhiker's at the galaxy the BBC reviving the old play of the l'aventure of the Hitchhiker's-Textes d'Infocom for deapparaître in the net location 4's of the radio. It's not only straight lines a port, everyone, which one - the new version of 'the of the play is illustrated obviously by Rod gentleman, the BAFTA for their graphics for the tev4. Originalseries.' won; ; of more hitchhiker; Hoopy!" ;

--
If my answers frighten you, stop asking scary questions.

Douglas Adams was wrong about Vogon poetry by Anonymous Coward · 2004-09-01 05:14 · Score: 2, Funny

Compared to Vogon spam, it's quite pleasant.

Freddle your gruntbuggly!

Hot and plurdled gabbleblotchits waiting for you

Refinance your foonting turlingdromes

Earn that crinkly bindlewurdle you've always dreamed of...

I got karma to burn... by Metallic+Matty · 2004-09-01 05:16 · Score: 5, Funny

Forty-second post.

Where do I put all my stuff??? by g_adams27 · 2004-09-01 05:17 · Score: 3, Informative

You know that thing your aunt gave you that you don't know what it is? Put your stuff in it. All your stuff. It'll fit! (well, except the really big stuff). Then throw it away. It'll show up in your hands, your pocket, or at your feet a few moves later.

Voila! No more accursed "Your load is too heavy" message.

Man, what I wouldn't give for something like that!

Re:Where do I put all my stuff??? by Thedalek · 2004-09-01 05:52 · Score: 3, Funny

Actually, I think in one version you could put your bathrobe in "the thing your aunt gave you and you don't know what it is," and then put TTYAGYAYDKWII in the pocket of your bathrobe. It even listed in your inventory that both were inside each other.

I thought it should have just ended the game right there, saying something along the lines of, "Okay, fine. You win. You've done something sillier than anything else we had planned. Happy?"

--
Happiness is relative, Based upon the way we live.

Play the old version here. by fireboy1919 · 2004-09-01 05:18 · Score: 3, Interesting

Actually, I've got a lot of my old inform (the name of the interpreter) favorites up on my site (all of these are freeware now afaik).

I signed the applet myself. If you accept write permission, then you can save the state of the game to your hard drive and restore from it.

--
Mod me down and I will become more powerful than you can possibly imagine!

42 by kavau · 2004-09-01 05:19 · Score: 2, Insightful

Not really internet related, but I think Douglas Adams' greatest achievement is that he provided us with a simple answer to the question about life, the universe, and everything. Whenever you engage in a metaphysical discussion about the meaning of life, his answer will invariably come up at some point.

Re:42 by titusjan · 2004-09-01 05:58 · Score: 2, Interesting

There is even a Ford model named after it.
Re:42 by Feanturi · 2004-09-01 08:21 · Score: 2

Whenever you engage in a metaphysical discussion about the meaning of life, his answer will invariably come up at some point.

Unfortunately far too often. I love that whole ultimate Question business, but whenever someone brightly quips, "42!" I just want to throttle them.

Text adventures... by monkeyfarm · 2004-09-01 05:23 · Score: 5, Interesting

It would seem that in 30 years of Natural Language processing advancements and so forth, that it would be possible to revive text adventure type games.

Personally I loved the things, but hated the frustration of being locked into typing EXACTLY what the command processor/ parser wanted.

I would hazard a guess that if a larger publisher backed the development of a professional quality text adventure, that on a percentage ROI basis, it would be very worthwhile from a business standpoint.

Especially if it was marketed and promoted in a way that Myst was years ago. I mean Myst got a lot of non-gamers to play a "game" (actually Myst was basically a powerpoint presentation with cheesy 3D graphics, not actually a game).

Compare the development cost and time frame of a quality text adventure with something like DoomIII. The potential market is thousands of times bigger because you could run the game on pretty much anything with a screen and input device cable of text entry and the processing power to handle a REALLY robust parser and command interpreter. There's no need for 4-6 years of R&D. Success is driven by creativity, etc. rather than eye-candy.

Sure it's not for everyone, but if you eliminate the frustration normally associated with parsers, have a quality product, market it properly, it could be a very good business opportunity.

That is if game publishers weren't complete lemmings.

--
What I don't know I just fake...

Re:Text adventures... by jackbird · 2004-09-01 09:52 · Score: 2, Interesting

...for a single author. Games are developed by teams these days, and an art director/editor working with several writers could fill in the game world faster.

The real question is... by Kenja · 2004-09-01 05:26 · Score: 2, Funny

The real question is, will it come with a small bag of space ships?

--

"Have you ever thought about just turning off the TV, sitting down with your kids, and hitting them?"

Re:BAFTA? by darth_MALL · 2004-09-01 05:27 · Score: 2, Interesting

perhaps 'tis the Bantha you seek?

the Google answer by loqi · 2004-09-01 05:31 · Score: 5, Funny

All your search engines are belong to Douglas.

--
If other reasons we do lack, we swear no one will die when we attack

Most Evil Game Ever, and here's why. by loqi · 2004-09-01 05:34 · Score: 2, Informative

The goddamned button on the thumb! Once you get ahold of that thing, you have one turn to press the right button. If you so much as look at the device, you're Vogon toast. Granted you only have to do this once before you know it, but any game that more or less says, "hehe, not this time" is pretty malicious.

Also, all that other impossible stuff.

--
If other reasons we do lack, we swear no one will die when we attack

Link to obligatory H2G2 IF game solution by Dthoma · 2004-09-01 05:36 · Score: 2, Informative

Full game walkthrough here.

--

Note to M1-ers: a curt but otherwise insightful message is not "Flamebait" or "Troll".

H2G2 like the internet - not by TintinX · 2004-09-01 05:39 · Score: 4, Interesting

I think I actually love DNA.
I've just come back from holidays where I re-read the full 5-part H2G2 trilogy that, despite being extremely familiar with, I enjoyed hugely.
Douglas should go down in the annals of literature because reading his stuff is as much about enjoying his words as it is about enjoying the story. You could read it 100 times and still smirk at his amazing sense of humour and wordplay.
Like a good wine, it's not just about getting merry.
To (mis)quote an excellent and early example:
"The jump through hyperspace is like being drunk."
"What's so bad about being drunk?"
"Ask a glass of water."
Absolute bloody genius, the like of which I don't think we've ever seen before or will ever see again.
I had the pleasure of hearing and meeting Douglas back in 1998 when I was studying at Oxford and he did an evolution lecture with Richard Dawkins (there was an evening!). He was a really, really lovely guy with loads of time for the geeks around him. Mention your love of the Mac to him and he was yours for the night!
I still miss him loads.

Share & Enjoy by fahrvergnugen · 2004-09-01 05:40 · Score: 5, Funny

Ah yes, the Sirius Cybernetics Corporation text adventure revival machine. When the page is accessed, the machine automatically analyzes the thought patterns and intelligence quotient of the player, in order to figure out exactly which precise combination of interesting prose and obtuse logic puzzles will provide the most mentally stimulating and pleasing gaming experience for the individual.

However, no-one quite knows why it does this, as it invariably spits out a boring graphical clickfest that is almost, but not entirely, unlike a text adventure.

--
Even Jesus hates listening to Creed.

Downloadable doesn't have the best part by red+floyd · 2004-09-01 05:45 · Score: 3, Funny

The old Infocom boxed game came with a pair of Joo-Jaglan Peril Sensitive Sunglasses!

--
The only reason we have the rights we have is that people just like us died to gain those rights. -- Cheerio Boy

My favorite story about that game.. by Zaphod-AVA · 2004-09-01 05:51 · Score: 3, Interesting

It's fun to tell people how I was stuck for 6 months on one part. I didn't know that while I was Ford, I was supposed to get Arthur drunk and give him my satchel fluff.

That game is hilarious, and evil. Modern game design simply doesn't delight in killing you nearly as much, or stranding you with no outs without restarting the game from scratch.

Personally, what I would like is a complete rip of all the text from the game.

-Z

Where to find new games by Athrawn17 · 2004-09-01 05:55 · Score: 2, Interesting

See this link here: http://www.ifcomp.org/ Also there is this about the IM bots which serve up INFOCOM games. Those can be found here: http://wired.com/news/games/0,2101,62791,00.html

Re:nerd ID card by Ford+Prefect · 2004-09-01 06:11 · Score: 5, Funny

I'll hand in my nerd ID card if you so deem it necessary, but I for one amd damn tired of anything related to HHGTTG.

As the article submitter, please accept my sincerest apologies. If there are any other topic that you, or anyone else, would not like aired, please let me know and I will not post articles relating to them in the future.

Best regards,

Ford Prefect ;-)

--
Tedious Bloggy Stuff - hooray?

What? How? by filpaul · 2004-09-01 06:15 · Score: 2, Funny

"reviving the old text adventure game..."
"the new version of the game will be illustrated..."

How do you Illustrate a Text Adventure game???
ASCII art??

Old games don't have so much an afterlife... by payndz · 2004-09-01 06:17 · Score: 2, Funny

...more a sort of apres-vis!

--
You must think in Russian.

Re:nerd ID card by Golias · 2004-09-01 06:22 · Score: 2, Interesting

You might not be the only one.

I absolutely worshipped his writing... when I was 14.

Looking back, he managed to write two-and-a-half oustanding books in his five-novel trilogy. The rest of his stuff was better than a lot of what's out there, but were kind of like the Sherlock Holmes stories Doyle wrote after "killing" Holmes off, only to find that popular demand compelled him to cash in... er... give in and write some new material.

In the end, Adams wound up being the sort of niche celebrity who actually thought the world gave a crap about his opinions on religion, politics, technology, and Dire Straits guitar solos. All I ever wanted out of him was some light chuckles about bureaucracy and Isaac Asimov novels, and when he was in his prime, that was what he delivered, with a style of prose which was often imitated, but never really duplicated.

But the brilliant punch of describing massive spaceships that hang in the air "exactly the same way that bricks don't," has been diluted slightly by a thousand posers (I'm looking in your direction, Mr. Pratchett) who were less adept at playing with the language yet still insisted on doing do.

The jokes have worn even thinner still from being quoted by college-aged nerds more often than the Knights Who Say Ni.

HHGTTG was the "Tom Swift" series of a whole generation, and we will see "the next Beatles" long before we ever see an author worthy of being called "the next Douglas Adams."

But yeah... I'm fucking sick of it too. I hope this new movie suffers a pre-natal death and is forgotten about.

--

Information wants to be anthropomorphized.

How Fitting by Zebbers · 2004-09-01 06:31 · Score: 2, Interesting

My professor for an awesome intro physics class called 7 Ideas that Shook the Universe played part of the audiotape today for the class. He said the easiest way to describe space was through that: "Space, Is big. Really big. You just won't believe how vastly hugely mind-bogglingly big it is. I mean, you might think it's a long walk down the road to the chemist, but that's just peanuts to space." "

Re:Whales and petunias ... by Alranor · 2004-09-01 06:50 · Score: 2, Informative

Ah yes, Agrajag

To be played by Douglas Adams himself in the upcoming radio series :)

Re: Close but no cigar by BitterAndDrunk · 2004-09-01 06:51 · Score: 2, Funny

If you BUY the sandwich as Dent you can't get it as Prefect, rendering it unrecoverable. IIRC. It was a long time ago and this WAS the most frustrating Infocom game ever. Well, next to Infidel. Infidel may have been really cool, I always died in the desert.

Yes, that's right, I never found the pyramid. Leave me alone.

--
You better watch out, there may be dogs about . . .

Writing these things was my first real job by Deep+Fried+Geekboy · 2004-09-01 07:12 · Score: 2, Interesting

Seriously... well, unless you count my brief employment as a rocket scientist at the Propellants, Explosives and Rocket Motor Establishment.

I did a whole game for Magnetic Scrolls called REACH FOR THE MOON, which unfortunately never got published as far as I know.

They were a very fun company to work for. I think I did the whole thing on a Sinclair Spectrum which they shipped out to me. It paid surprisingly well, too.

--

I'm not wrong. You haven't thought about it hard enough.

Opening picture for C64 version by XNormal · 2004-09-01 07:13 · Score: 2, Interesting

Some copies of the C64 version of the Infocom game had an opening picture featuring the green eyeless alien and a thumb. It was displayed while the game loaded and wasn't part of the original game. It was added to an illegally distributed copy.

Does anyone here remember this picture? Anyone has a copy that can be run on an emulator? I drew this picture and I'd love to see it again...

--
Stop worrying about the risks of nuclear power and start worrying about the risks of not using nuclear power.

So... by jwdb · 2004-09-01 07:26 · Score: 2, Interesting

... any chance of finding the original game anywhere? If the company's bankrupt, not much chance of purchasing it....

What's the copyright status? Abandonware?

Jw

/. Icon by Arthur+Yossarian · 2004-09-01 08:02 · Score: 2

With all the new HHGTG stuff coming out over the next year (new radio play, movie, etc.), I think Slashdot should make a HHGTG icon. After all, LOTR got an icon when the movies were released. The original mascot (spherical green alien with its tongue sticking out, giving a thumbs up) would fit nicely.

--
"Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so." - Ford Prefect

Re:/. Icon by Tim+Browse · 2004-09-01 08:47 · Score: 4, Informative

I can't let that one go by...Douglas hated that mascot - absolutely hated it.
I'd go for a 'Don't Panic' icon.

Douglas Adams' Other Interactive Fiction by Feneric · 2004-09-01 08:03 · Score: 3, Interesting

I'm glad the IF version of "Hitchhikers' Guide" is coming back. I hope they take it further and bring back some of his other IF titles. "Bureaucracy" is deserving, and I've not had the opportunity to try "Starship Titanic".

"Offtopic" by mrchaotica · 2004-09-01 08:12 · Score: 4, Funny

Hey, this is the Guide we're talking about here! How is it possible for anything to be off-topic?!

--

"[Regarding the 'cloud,'] ownership was what made America different than Russia." -- Woz

Best thing was "Consult Guide" by grantdh · 2004-09-03 12:35 · Score: 2, Informative

Absolute funniest bits though were if you typed in "consult guide about (whatever)" eg:

consult guide about heart of gold

Back would come this long spiel asking how you'd heard about it, it didn't exist and would you please check yourself in for reconditioning.

All sorts of other gems lurked within, just waiting for you to ask about them.

A close second was saying to Ford Prefect:

Say to Ford what about my house

response: It's not a house, it's a home

Crack up :)

--

I left my body to science, but I'm afraid they've turned it down...

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