Slashdot Mirror
Low-Energy Laser Etching May Replace Fruit Labels
MikeChino writes "How many times have you bit into a piece of fruit only to find that you're also chomping on a sticker label? The small sticky labels have long been the bane of waste-conscious fruit and vegetable eaters, but that might all change thanks to new technology that uses a low-energy carbon dioxide laser beam to etch information directly onto produce. No more peeling those annoying labels! So far the technology is being used on a number of fruits and vegetables in New Zealand, Australia, and Pacific Rim countries, and it's currently going through the final stages of review by the FDA. Once the technology is approved in the US, researchers from the University of Florida and the USDA Agricultural Research Service hope that it will be used in Florida's massive grapefruit industry."
I think they solved the wrong problem.
I can't wait til they're required by law to give us all the nutritional information of every piece of fruit, down to the calorie count and the chemical breakdown. Perhaps government will put missing persons reports on them, or government mandated reminders of what it means to be a good citizen! So many useful applications!
http://www.beanleafpress.com
What chemical change is caused in the skin to form the pattern? How deep does it go? The skin is a protective barrier, and if it's compromised by the process, this could have a negative effect on shelf-life.
# cat
Damn, my RAM is full of llamas.
"How many times have you bit into a piece of fruit only to find that you're also chomping on a sticker label?"
Erm, never? Because I always wash my fruits (as in apples, pears) first before eating them?
This is an answer in search of a problem: To be honest, I'd rather have a blemish-free apple, than one with carvings.
When you shoot a mime, do you use a silencer?
Ok the article talks about laser etching... Meaning it burns the skin... What does the article comment say:
Is that ink? What is it made of?
Honestly, I have some reservations about zesting that into my lemon squares
All I can think of is Homer Simpson... Do people not think about things at all???? Do people not understand English? Etching means...
to cut, bite, or corrode with an acid or the like;
In this case it is a laser, and hence it means to cut or bite with a laser... I just shake my head...
"You can't make a race horse of a pig"
"No," said Samuel, "but you can make very fast pig"
can we burn our MP3 files on this lemon? :)
Does this mean we can finally replace PLUs with UPCs? I'd no longer have to wait in the self-checkout line behind the guy who's looking for a picture of an endive.
This is particularly good news for me, because I can only eat foods that have been etched with a laser. Goodbye scurvy!
Great, now when I need zest for a recipe, instead of just being able to give a fruit a good wash and scrub (which you are supposed to do before eating it anyway) I will have to use more fruit to get the same amount of zest because I will have to avoid the massive laser etched brand names that this will inevitably lead to.
Why do we need a sticker label anyway? Just label the punnets or crates or whatever the fruit are shipped in, and assume the contents match? Seems like a solution in search of a problem...
The sales pitch: "How many times have you bit into a piece of fruit only to find that you're also chomping on a sticker label?"
1. If this sales pitch were any dumber, I'd assume it was a quote from a Simpsons episode I had somehow missed.
2. Getting rid of fruit labels is a bad marketing idea. Kids freakin love them.
3. Any sales pitch like this is indicative of a solution in search of a problem. It sounds like a pitch from a bad infomercial.
I scream. You scream. I assume that means we're both acquainted with the problem. We proceed.
"How many times have you bit into a piece of fruit only to find that you're also chomping on a sticker label?"
What the hell? This sounds like infomercial lady. You know, the lady who can't open jars, puts her lamps too far away from the bed to be able to turn them off from the bed, learned basic household tasks like cleaning the bathroom or doing laundry by watching Vaudeville shows, can't figure out that she needs to wear a sports bra with a tank top, etc. This person is already too dumb to live. Let's not help her out further by using a frickin laser to etch info on the sides of fruit just so she doesn't have to worry to check for the sticker which is almost always there (and pretty hard to miss when you're washing the fruit).
"This Apple brought to you by Apple"
An SQL query goes to a bar, walks up to a table and asks, "Mind if I join you?"
For a technology site, most of the comments here are surprisingly anti-technology.
A new graphics card comes out? Commentors will gripe that old school games with shitty graphics are better anyway.
A new CPU comes out? Same thing : commentors will complain that extra CPU power is just more cycles for crummy, inefficient programming to squander with useless eye candy features.
A laser that eliminates that annoying plastic label on fruit and the FCKING ARTICLE says that it's safe? Commentors say that THEY won't benefit because THEY always peel and wash their fruit, and they're afraid that the lasering will make fruit decay sooner (without reading the article that says the lasering does not appreciably damage the fruit's skin)
Thank god we've finally gotten to the bottom of that whole fruit label thing. Maybe now we can get around to tackling cancer.
Name...That...Autocomplete!
The spammers will instantly attack bananas with ads for P3N1$ EnL4rg3mEnt or V14gra.
SSC
Gives you more reason to put a banana in your pants.
Or... Don't label it on the fruit at all!
If you need to label it "Florida citrus", do it on the outside the box in the supermarket.
Actually that labelling on the fruit must be a US thing. They don't do it here in Denmark.
Maybe it's just me, but I feel that I haven't tasted a real fruit (or vegetable) for some years now. Non-organic fruits have a similar tasteless taste. Anyway, making fruity flavoured edible stickers would make just as much sense as tattooing food.
Locksmith
"How many times have you bit into a piece of fruit only to find that you're also chomping on a sticker label?
Answer: Never :D
They're quite easy to spot: they look like a little sticker label.
In addition, most fruits here don't even have a sticker. We're quite capable of distinguishing between a banana and an apple without sticker.
with getting the sharks focused on labeling produce.
Entropy just isn't what it used to be.
The etching may be all well and good for the brand names, but I believe most grocery stores use different produce codes. So the individual stores will still need to put stickers on.
If they can laser etch messages then the next step is using it to remove blemishes, enhance the appearance, and effectively "photoshop" food to make it appear more photogenic.
Then again, am I the only one who thinks this could be the next step in tattoo art - never mind some hairy goth with a needle, give me a CNC laser that can print my choice of design onto my arm at 1200dpi and I might consider it.
There is no music - home taping killed it.
they don't taste that bad, really.
You could put the label on the boxes, or on a sign in the store.. come to think of it, they already do, so why the hell do you need stickers on each individual piece of fruit?
Well what the hell am i supposed to stick on my cats' foreheads now.
. . . I want to know if it tastes good.
Fruit should be lasered according to how it tastes: "Good", "Great!", "Sweaty Tennis Socks", etc.
Schroedinger's Brexit: The UK is both in and out of the EU at the same time!
Considering the amount of fruit that is produced in a given year, even though the stickers are really cheap. This system will probably pay for itself fairly quickly just by removing the cost of putting the stickers on. I suspect that once the FDA approves it we will be seeing it all over the market more for this reason then for the consumers. I'm excited because all the people that litter and paste them on things won't be able to anymore.
...'coz I wash my greens/fruits carefully before eating them. Anything else would be just disgusting.
Once this is in use, I don't imagine it will be long before your fruit is covered with more ads than a NASCAR racing suit. On the up-side, the opportunities for a bit of creative pranking are just about limitless.
I've calculated my velocity with such exquisite precision that I have no idea where I am.
"How many times have you bit into a piece of fruit only to find that you're also chomping on a sticker label?
Never. Not a single time. Unless you eat fruit in the dark, or are blind, this simply never happens and this is a solution looking for a problem.
Personally I think it makes the fruit itself somehow artificial and unappealing. I doubt this will ever catch on. I'd rather eat one that hasn't been maimed - it will also look nicer in the fruit bowl without the skin-spam.
because I would select "Scary but True +1" for your post.
We could have the reverse too "Turn in your tinfoil hat -1"
* Winners compare their achievements to their goals, losers compare theirs to that of others.
How many times have you bit into a piece of fruit only to find that you're also chomping on a sticker label?
Exactly as many times, as a happened to be a complete and utter drooling retard with no right to live, who should have long ago received a Darwin award! (I.e. never!)
Any sufficiently advanced intelligence is indistinguishable from stupidity.
See, this makes me think about this the other way 'round: ads etched on tablets. Spammers could provide free, ad-supported medication for dangerous off-label use.
# cat
Damn, my RAM is full of llamas.
Sounds good as long as it doesn't compromise the foods shelf life in any way. The skin on fruits and vegetables is a barrier against pathogens. If the skin is broken or marked the fruit will spoil much faster.
arielCo writes "Those helpful-yet-annoying little stickers on fruits that tell the cashier the variety and brand may be replaced with a CO2 laser etching. Quoth the PhysOrg article: "the laser cauterizes the peel, much like when a laser is used on human skin. The cauterized area is impenetrable to pathogens and decay organisms and resists water loss". Demonstrated on a grapefruit, it is due for testing on "tomatoes, avocado and other citrus fruits". The original paper (abstract) requires a paid subscription."
This post contains no rudeness or derision of any kind. All arguments are friendly. Terms and exclusions may apply.
"How many times have you bit into a piece of fruit only to find that you're also chomping on a sticker label?"
ZERO. Don't you wash your fruit before eating it? Sheesh.
Now we can't even be bothered to peel a tiny sticker off a piece of fruit.
"How many times have you bit into a piece of fruit only to find that you're also chomping on a sticker label?"
Honestly? Never. Ever. I didn't know this was a problem tha
welcome our new laser-etched fruit-lords.
What's next? Advertisement on fruit? Sure... just cover all my food with viagra ads.
They should do that with the "enlarge your manhood" ads and bananas. Some of those huge bananas that the American multinationals seem to favour made me quite jealous :-/
money is being spent to protect people from their own stupidity.
Biting into the label? Seriously?
This is another one of those annoying blog posts where some uninformed non-scientist copy-pastes an article from a reputable scientific reporting organisation. At least in this case he linked to the original: http://www.physorg.com/news176483573.html which appears to be a duplicate of an even older article: http://www.physorg.com/news170927623.html
The main advantage appears to be not that people don't have to peel the sticker off before eating their apples but rather that the label cannot be tampered with. (Or at least, not easily.)
Sig matters not. Judge me by my sig, do you?
Where can I buy one of these massive grapefruits from Florida? Or are they talking about Ricky Williams' head?
Damn, you're right! This is must be what happens to members of Congress. As soon as they are sworn in, each member of Congress is laser etched with an identifier. This allows for faster rot and corruption.
Every mans' island needs an ocean; choose your ocean carefully.
my fruit label collection is going to be worth millions!
...for the research into splicing zebra genes into produce to automatically grow barcodes into fruit and vegetables?
This will make some awesome looking fruit/vegetable decorations if someone can get their hands on the laser. Apples with smiley faces on them, make em festive looking. Potatoes with cooking instructions. Put numbers on em for vegetable racing, I dunno. Just a few ideas... Man we could have some fun with this laser.
"Quote me as saying I was mis-quoted." -Groucho Marx
Not to mention blueberries...
using a magnifying glass and a bright day is cheaper. I win. Money please.
...'cos if you don't then it's not really a problem, is it?
No sig today...
I think it's funny groups like PETA get all up in arms about poor treatment of animals when fruits and vegetables are getting inhumanely branded before their corpses are devoured by an uncaring mob. It only adds insult to injury.
Zero.
Because grapefruit is a fruit you bite into?
And this has been another installament of Captain Obvious!
1) laser etch advertisings on fruits
2) ???
3) Profit!!!
Why does it strike me as more of a ploy to make sure you can't remove the label even if you wanted to?
I'll bet right now marketing is sitting around a conference table:
"This looks pretty good for a start, but we've done some market research that shows that consumers want the labeling on the inside as well. We need some type of penetrating laser that will label the edible parts inside. We need to be able to etch the outside of the banana skin as well as etch at least a logo on the edible part inside. Also, if we're doing citirus, we need to be able to etch each segment. We need to make sure our logo is seen from the moment you go into the store to the moment you put it in your mouth... Hmmm, I wonder if we can extend that to the moment we flush it down...
That might explain the reference to "Florida's massive grapefruit".
Strange things are afoot at the Circle-K.
Burning the skin of a grapefruit with a laser may be ok, but here are some questions:
1) With the laser burns, it may be possible to cover up blemishes or signs of mold or rot on the skin of a fruit.
2) What happens with apples, potatoes, carrots, pears, and other fruits and vegetables where its good to eat the skin? I don't want some artificial chemical imprinted into the skins that I would normally eat.
I always know a label is there, I know to take it off. For fruits and vegetables with skins that are supposed to removed, the label is not a problem because I peel off the skin.
So this technology does not really solve anything, and it becomes an inconvenience.
I don't think the label ever bothered me, I knew to peel it off. Now if you start burning the outside layer of citrus It will be a pain to peel the rind for use in cooking. Peeling a label off does not ruin the rind, but I would not want lazer burned rind used for flavoring any of my desserts.
I use citrus zest all the time! If this technique changes the flavor, texture, or aroma of my fruit, I say stick with the labels. I can peel off a label and still have the whole zest. That etching means I lost a good chunk of peel I'd use for candied citrus peel, not to mention making any sorbet served inside an orange just plain silly-looking.
Apparently sharks have gotten wiser and are now trying to attract a 'healthier crowd' by using fruit as bait. I hope this trend in eating healthier humans pleases our laser mounted ocean-dwelling overlords.
Ginga no Rekshiya Mata Each page.
This aught to make supermarkets happy as it's bound to cut down on the number of cashiers entering organic produce (e.g. 94011 - organic bananas, 94664 - organic vine tomatoes) as regular, less expensive, produce (4011 - bananas, 4664 vine tomatoes).
The proper way of solving this problem is to produce a GM variant that grows the bar code into the skin.
I guess the cashier cannot distinguish between the types because they're... indistinguishable?
I always wondered, why don't they just sell the "standard" ones and just put a collection box for the unfair traded farmers near the cashier?
And, uh, if there are "organic" as opposed to "standard" bananas, i wonder what the "standard" ones are made of. Even plastic is organic...
I know how to spell banananananas, i just don't know when to stop.
Musicians don't die. They just decompose.
The article shows pictures of fruit where you peel off the skin. OK.
But it also shows samples of tomatoes and peppers branded by the laser. When I make stuffed peppers or grilled tomatoes I don't what to have see all that burnt on lettering over the food. It will spoil the look of the meal.
At least a sticker I can peel off. Not that fruit should need labels anyway. I know what sort of fruit they are and I can tell if they're fresh and they're usually right next to big sign telling me how much they cost where they're from. What more do I need to know that you feel is important enough to have to laser etch into my food?
----------------------------------- My Other Sig Is Hilarious -----------------------------------
How many times have you bit into a piece of fruit only to find that you're also chomping on a sticker label? ... Researchers...hope that it will be used in Florida's massive grapefruit industry.
This is huge. I can't tell you how much I hate accidentally eating the label on grapefruit.
Never shake hands with a man you meet in a fertility clinic.
Lasers have been used for many years to label regular manufactured objects like bottles and bumpers. I'm sure somebody wanted to laser label fruit sooner, but it took a while to get cheap and effective technology to identify and target every single fruit as thousands per minute pass on a conveyor. Natural objects have a bunch more variability than manufactured ones.
I've heard of developers making lasers that can shoot female mosquitoes in flight to stop reproduction and reduce the spread of malaria. I've also heard of researchers developing the ability to identify individual cancer cells floating through the bloodstream. If you could identify, target, and shoot cancer cells then you might help stop a cancer from metastasizing while the main tumor is attacked by conventional means. And if you could shrink the system into an implantable device, you might leave it as a sentry in a person with a history of cancer.
So the economic forces that lead to laser etching for fruits just might lead to applications you find less frivolous.
And yet another thing that used to not be permanently branded with one or more company's logo disappears.
When the last one disappears, will we notice?
- ------- There are ten kinds of people in the world. Those who understand binary, and those who... Huh?
As I bit into the nectarine, it had a crisp juiciness that I found pleasurable... until I realized that it wasn't a nectarine at all, but a human head.
Gamingmuseum.com: Give your 3D accelerator a rest.
"thanks to new technology that uses a low-energy carbon dioxide laser beam"
I thought we were trying to REDUCE or carbon footprint!
I'm not an idiot.
Now ask me how many licks to the center of a tootsie pop.
The Kruger Dunning explains most post on
Does it matter?
The Kruger Dunning explains most post on
I love flan, but I just can't eat it and drive at the same time. Look! I've got flan all over me! Introducing: Pocket Flan!
John goes out to the store and buys an apple. The apple has a data matrix on it that when scanned with John's cell phone camera takes him to a web site that tells him where the fruit came from and shows some nice pictures of a beautiful country side. Now John is really happy with his apple and would like to buy a trip to that nice locale.
none of this whining about branding, or advertising whaa whaa whaa.
I can go to other sites for that crap.
You sir got it right. It's a LASER writing on fruits and vegetables. How awesome is that?
And this:
"Potatoes with cooking instructions. "
Is brilliant.
The Kruger Dunning explains most post on
Who eats something without looking at it first? Even the blind people that I have seen feel over over the fruit before eating it. How many people eat the skin of an orange, grapefruit, or banana? I don't eat the skin of an apple either but I am in the minority in that I think.
I LOVE massive grapefruit. They have more flavor than the massless variety.
Is how they're going to train the sharks to do the writing.
Probably not...
- ------- There are ten kinds of people in the world. Those who understand binary, and those who... Huh?
Lovely; now my bowl of fruit can sport UPC's. I can see the still-life now. Looks like one of wired's found future objects :-)
Remember Josie Dressendorfer? She was a six-year-old who had a fruit sticker caught in one of her lungs. I blame the parents.
How many times have you bit into a piece of fruit only to find that you're also chomping on a sticker label?
Man, don't I know it. I can't even begin to count the number of times I was in the produce section of the supermarket when I was suddenly overcome with a primal urge to blindly ram whole fruit into my mouth. Doesn't matter what type; apples, pears, oranges, kiwi, pineapples, whatever's immediately there, I grab it and jam it into my mouth with reckless abandon, not even bothering to look at what it is, let alone whether or not it's one of the many, many fruits that have stickers on them.
Now, I'll admit that a fair share of the inconvenience I've had from this condition stems from dealing with these backwards yokels around where I live who are either unable or unwilling to understand my perfectly common and normal intermittent fruit-ravenous needs, but in all actuality, there's nothing more annoying than the thought that when I'm forcing an apple down my throat without looking at it, there's a chance that there may be a sticker on it. I can barely stand the thought sitting here right now!
That's why I'm so glad the good people who work for our nation's fruit growers have recognized this very obvious need which, until this point, has been sorely lacking a solution. The next time I'm racing through the produce department, not even bothering to even give the most cursory of glances at what I eat before I eat it despite the fact that it is fairly well-known that there are stickers on fruit, I will salute our laser-etching fruit guardians.
Demanding constant attention will only lead to attention.
I approve this technique! Just think of how cool kids will feel when they pull a grunge-styled banana out of their lunchbox... or an apple with skateboards all over it! Maybe an orange with Hannah Montana and all that girly sparkly crap. I mean, from past experience with fruit roll-ups, the obvious next step is X-TREME fruit, right? It practically markets itself.
"How many times have you bit into a piece of fruit only to find that you're also chomping on a sticker label?"
Emm, never???
Many recipes call for the zest of a fruit. While I can wash off a sticker, not so for a laser burn. I sure hope the etching process does not taint the zest.
A couple of weeks ago we saw that Kelloggs was going to laser etch corn flakes http://preview.tinyurl.com/yl56ddd ... how did we ever live without this?
What is the carbon foot print of these co2 lasers? How much carbon is used to process the paper sticker compared to the laser etching? :) Not that I care, but this will be raised by the climate change folks.
can't they just take something for the pain?
The pharma industry? Hurting?
When the pharma industry hurts, pigs will fly!
Whereas the pigs currently flew and the pharma are rejoicing.
(Ok, sorry for the bad pun).
"Sufficiently advanced satire is indistinguishable from reality." - [Tips: 1DrYakQDKCQ6y52z6QbnkxHXAocMZJE61o ]
I give this a week before someone puts other messages into that process. I'd keep an eye on bananas :-).
Insert
If they could etch something onto the fruit that indicated its ripeness/flavor (by changing color), that would be exciting. Except for bananas, I am pretty lousy at doing this.
for some bright spark to get creative with this? ;)
Why not gouge a UPC barcode into them as well? Hey, wait... can we do this with babies when they're born? Can we zap a barcode into their foreheads that will stay put? I call dibs on one that translates to 666.
well, not anymore...thanks to your quote...
"How many times have you bit into a piece of fruit only to find that you're also chomping on a sticker label?"
Never, because I'm not stupid.
"organic" in this context is short for "organical food," which is an FDA defined term for organically grown food which must meet a strict set of rules and must be certified before "Organic" and be used in the marketing. Natural is whatever the manufactorer wants it to mean though.
Plastic isn't "organic" in this context because its not food at all..
This man had a plastic fork in his lung: http://www.kpic.com/news/national/59730562.html
Are they ill-tempered fruits?
Note this uses a carbon dioxide laser i.e. the solution to global warming, the more lasers we build the more we sequestrate the CO2.
Woohoo, a win-win for all.
cashiers can't tell the organic fruits by appearance alone. Organic fruit have 5 digits codes that start with a 9.
hope that it will be used in Florida's massive grapefruit industry.
I wouldn't have thought there'd be much of a market for massive grapefruit. I mean, I like grapefruit, but the regular size is plenty to eat for breakfast.
... and then they built the supercollider.
This doesn't seem like a bad idea, because these labels may end up being cheaper and they can't fall off or be switched. So it helps out large processors and grocery stores.
However, for uses like citrus twists in beverages, citrus wedges or wheels in drinks, and citrus zest for flavoring I don't want anything marring the skin of my fruit. Sure I could work around the labels, but I don't necessarily want to, it means I can use less of the fruit.
"How many times have you bit into a piece of fruit only to find that you're also chomping on a sticker label?"
Umm... never? Seriously... are there legions of people biting into fruit and choking on stickers?
Stop writing shit on fruit.
Children love to peel the sticker off and stick it on their forehead. I hate to think what children will be doing to their foreheads if this laser thing catches on.
In China they put a stencil on their apples, let it get sun kissed and remove the stencil. Kind of like a cute heart tan line that you can get in a tanning booth.
Doesn't anyone remember the oranges that had printed-on blue labels? I think that Sunkist used to do that.
I've looked all over, and found some fruit label sites like this, but haven't been able to find a picture of an orange with the printing.
I think that the ink could rub off, which is perhaps why the fruit industry abandoned that method. Interestingly, the printing looked nearly exactly like the laser imprinting, albeit in a different color and a little less crisp.
coding is life
The labels aren't advertisements.
Ah, but I wouldn't be surprised if the nifty laser labeling leads to large advertisements on the fruits. Or perhaps some entrepreneur will try to increase sales by lasering beautiful art or patterns on their fruit.
uhh, never because i don't eat fruit in the dark? WTF?
Can't say I think that's such a great idea. Considering that more and more people are buying stuff on the internet anyway, it seems reasonable to assume that fruit and veg don't really need to be labeled as such, since you can view the price on the internet. And anyone remember those smart fridges which could access the internet and auto restock your fridge contents? They sounded awesome! Anyways, just look at sites like http://www.dubli.com/ and you'll see what I mean. The internet's a growing place, and there's hundreds of ways to monetize it. This is just one of many areas where it's diversifying and changing our lives, for better or worse.
The idea of burning the label into the skin brings a whole new meaning to 'branding' and 'brand power'
Endless confusion on Madison Avenue
Third Career: Tree Farmer Second Career: Computer Geek First Career: Teacher, Outdoor Instructor, Photographer.
Could this technology be used to apply tattoos to people? Would that represent a threat to the hard working skin artists of the American tattoo industry? Is the grungy, sensitive biker dude who etches L O V E on one set of knuckles and H A T E on the other about to be replaced by a carbon dioxide laser?
Ask Me About... The 80's!
Produce Manager: "That's a very rare Maylasian Lime. It tastes just like a juicy med-rare steak, you'll love it." What an advance, chicken is so dull and boring. Not to mention over-used.
Joke's on you MiniM if these laser'd fruit all begin to taste like a juicy med-rare steak.
"Therefore God is organized abundance." —Newt Gingrich
John, I think your warning label: "Warning: this article may contain humor, sarcasm, parody, and perhaps even irony []. Read at your own risk." should include "or juicy med-rare steak" in the [] spot.
...looking up slash/dot's comparative definition of "anal" and "way anal".
I guess the cashier cannot distinguish between the types because they're... indistinguishable?
If people will pay more, the stores can charge more. More power to 'em, I say.
And, uh, if there are "organic" as opposed to "standard" bananas, i wonder what the "standard" ones are made of. Even plastic is organic...
I think you know what "organic food" means. You're just being purposefully dense.
I know how to spell banananananas, i just don't know when to stop.
I chuckled.
Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
You're cooking it anyhow... and we don't even know whether it would change the flavour substantially yet.
Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
You don't bite into a grapefruit anyway......
This man had a plastic toothbrush in his dick: http://4chanarchive.org/brchive/dspl_thread.php5?thread_id=171138247