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Woman Trademarks Name and Threatens Sites Using It

An anonymous reader writes "Be careful mentioning Dr. Ann De Wees Allen. She's made it clear that she's trademarked her name and using it is 'illegal... without prior written permission.' She even lists out the names of offenders and shows you the cease-and-desist letter she sends them. And, especially don't copy any of the text on her website, because she's using a bit of javascript that will warn you 'Copyright Protect!' if you right click on a link."

200 of 273 comments (clear)

  1. Worthless Trademark by Sonny+Yatsen · · Score: 5, Informative

    It's a common misconception that a trademark registration gives you some sort of proprietary right over the mark. People think that it'll allow them to stop anyone from even mentioning the mark.

    But the problem for them is that a trademark is not designed to give them property rights, but designed to prevent the public from being mislead about the origins of a product. In order to infringe a trademark, the public must have a likelihood of confusion as to which product they're buying or using. So, if a company infringes claims to be Dr. Ann De Wees Allen's company and starts selling a competing product, then she'd have a case against them. She has absolutely no case against someone just mentioning her name off-hand. My post mentioning "Dr. Ann De Wees Allen" does not create any confusion in the person reading my post that somehow my post is actually from "Dr. Ann De Wees Allen". She's got a worthless trademark.

    The funny thing is that she's actually got a fairly well known IP firm to prosecute the trademark, so she must've spent at least several thousand dollars in getting this worthless trademark registration. I wonder if the firm warned her that the mark is useless and she persisted anyway, or if the firm omitted the worthless nature of the mark to her.

    On a sidenote, for hilarity's sake, let's refer to her as "She Who Cannot Be Named."

    --
    My postings are informational and does not constitute legal advice. Act on it at your risk.
    1. Re:Worthless Trademark by Sonny+Yatsen · · Score: 3, Informative

      http://tarr.uspto.gov/servlet/tarr?regser=serial&entry=76116199 ---- Here's a link to her trademark registration, by the way.

      --
      My postings are informational and does not constitute legal advice. Act on it at your risk.
    2. Re:Worthless Trademark by Music2Eat · · Score: 1

      Wait, are you Dr. Ann De Wees Allen?

    3. Re:Worthless Trademark by Haedrian · · Score: 1, Funny

      Dear Sir/Madam

      We notice that you have used "Dr. Ann De Wees Allen" 3 times in the above comment. Dr. Ann De Wees Allen is a trademark held by Dr. Ann De Wees Allen.

      Therefore we are suing you into oblivion.

      Love

      MoneyHungryLawers R Us

    4. Re:Worthless Trademark by mooingyak · · Score: 2, Funny

      my post is actually from "Dr. Ann De Wees Allen"

      Just thought I'd point out you actually said that.

      --
      William of Ockham had no beard. The most likely explanation is that it was chewed off by squirrels every morning.
    5. Re:Worthless Trademark by julesh · · Score: 5, Informative

      But the problem for them is that a trademark is not designed to give them property rights, but designed to prevent the public from being mislead about the origins of a product

      Looking at the list of sites that have apparently been sent notices of infringement, it is worth noting that this is precisely what they were doing. These sites were basically all people who were selling supposed fitness-improving supplements (e.g. protein drinks, that kind of stuff), one of which She Who Must Not Be Named apparently invented, and seemed to be using her name to indicate that she was somehow involved with their businesses when (it appears) she wasn't.

      For instance, this site appears to sell a drink made with her formulation. However, according to her own site she has not licensed that formulation to them, and nor are they in any way associated with her.

      It seems to me that this is an entirely valid use of trademark law. Yes, some of the language on her site is a little strong, but it seems (at least as long as she isn't outright lying about this) that the people receiving the takedown notices are deserving of them.

    6. Re:Worthless Trademark by sortadan · · Score: 5, Interesting

      Heh, the actual owner of the trademark is 'NUTRILAB CORPORATION, INC.'. I assume she is part or full owner, but since it's a corp she could be voted out at a board meeting or sell her stake, at which point (by their logic) she could no longer use her own name without violating the trademark.

    7. Re:Worthless Trademark by Fnkmaster · · Score: 3, Informative

      Yeah, I mean, why let something like logic get in the way of some good Slashdot nerdrage?

      In any case, I think people here are worked up in part because they think she's a quack and there's no medical science behind what she's selling, which is almost surely true. But that's a failure of the FDA and FTC and the powers vested in them by Congress, not of trademark law.

      While this sounds like a somewhat aggressive use of trademark law, if she's really just preventing people from falsely creating the impression that they are selling endorsed or licensed products or otherwise making use of her name to compete against her own products, I don't see anything worth nerdraging about from a trademark perspective.

      I hate quacks as much as the next geek, but we should hate them because they reject science and mislead the public, rather than that they are enforcing trademarks aggressively.

    8. Re:Worthless Trademark by DrAnnDeWeesAllen · · Score: 3, Funny

      Me-Who-Cannot-Be-Named!

    9. Re:Worthless Trademark by DJRumpy · · Score: 1

      Informative AND funny first post, and on a Monday morning no less.

      Has hell frozen over?

      On a sidenote, for hilarity's sake, let's refer to her as "She Who Cannot Be Named."

    10. Re:Worthless Trademark by Pharmboy · · Score: 1

      Time to Google bomb "Dr. Ann De Wees Allen" and "stupid bitch" together. Kind of how we all did SCO with "litigious bastards".

      --
      Tequila: It's not just for breakfast anymore!
    11. Re:Worthless Trademark by Improv · · Score: 1

      I see nothing in that site that indicates approval. It appears to be simple facts about the history of the formula. Saying "This is FOO brand" is different than noting "We make X, which was originally concocted by FOO".

      --
      For every problem, there is at least one solution that is simple, neat, and wrong.
    12. Re:Worthless Trademark by Culture20 · · Score: 1

      It's appears she's a "...SUGAR REPLACEMENT..."
      Isn't that sweet?

    13. Re:Worthless Trademark by HungryHobo · · Score: 1

      I'm surprised this wasn't mentioned in the summary but she's also a member of the roay line!
      http://www.anndeweesallen.com/LINEAGE.htm

    14. Re:Worthless Trademark by wvmarle · · Score: 1

      Well obviously talking about trademarks is fine. Otherwise /. would have been sued all over by all the brands that are commonly mentioned in the postings. Linux, Microsoft, HP, Dell, Nokia. I'm free to name them, I can just not claim them as my own.

      As another poster already pointed out, talking about trademarks is fine, trying to sell a product/service using the mark while you do not own the mark and you may confuse the buyer is not OK. It is even possible to have the same mark registered by multiple people/companies, as long as they are not in the same business. Think Apple Computer vs. Apple Music (hope I recall that name correctly). They were in different businesses (until iTunes, which caused Apple Music to sue again over trademark infringement). And there exist many similar examples. As long as you are in a different market you can register a trademark. You could for example start selling erectile dysfunction drugs under the "Microsoft" brand if you would be inclined to do so. And if you have deep enough pockets to fight the likely case brought against you by the software company of the same name, you may actually come out victorious.

      Technically you do not even have to register, a trademark becomes yours as soon as you start using it, but registering important marks is a good idea of course. Makes winning lawsuits easier. No time limit; a trademark remains yours as long as you use it. This in contrast with other IP such as copyrights and patents which do have an expiry date (though the expiry time for copyright is practically "never"). Also I know one may lose a trademark by not using it - if a mark is in disuse long enough and someone else starts using it, you may lose it.

    15. Re:Worthless Trademark by gila_monster · · Score: 5, Informative

      That's modded funny, but it's 100% correct. That happened to Gary Fisher (of bicycling fame) some years ago. He's a bit annoyed that he can't get he company to quit putting his name on bikes he thinks aren't that good.

      --
      Ad luna, Alicia! Ad luna!
    16. Re:Worthless Trademark by HungryHobo · · Score: 1

      damn
      *Royal

    17. Re:Worthless Trademark by daveime · · Score: 1

      I happen to like bright orange colored pee !

    18. Re:Worthless Trademark by bickerdyke · · Score: 1

      "she who doesn't WANT to be named"

      not to be confused with "The artist whose former name was held captive by his record label"

      --
      bickerdyke
    19. Re:Worthless Trademark by uglyduckling · · Score: 3, Insightful

      Nah, what they're doing is the equivalent of saying "Mono is based upon .net, which was developed by Microsoft (TM)". That's not the same as violating a trademark, it's just stating a fact.

    20. Re:Worthless Trademark by jank1887 · · Score: 1

      I predict a Kartman song in the near future...

    21. Re:Worthless Trademark by cjb658 · · Score: 1

      It appears we have invented a new swear word!

      Dr. Ann De Wees Allen

    22. Re:Worthless Trademark by mcheu · · Score: 1

      So, would it give her any protection in case of identity theft? Surely someone's causing market confusion about the product in that case.

    23. Re:Worthless Trademark by MikaelC · · Score: 2, Insightful

      I did a quick search for this Nutrilab Corp.

      Take a look at the following sites, that all link to each other, and revolves about dr. Ann:

      http://www.anndeweesallen.com/ [ip:64.106.155.30]
      http://www.nanoscienceinstitute.com/ [ip:64.106.155.30]
      http://www.glycemic.com/ [ip:64.106.155.30]
      http://www.nutrilabusa.com/ [ip:64.106.155.30]
      http://www.genefoundation.com/ [ip:64.106.155.30]
      http://www.ediblecomputerchips.com/ [ip:64.106.155.30]
      http://www.trutinadulcem.com/ [ip:64.106.155.30]


      Notice anything peculiar about the IP-number?

    24. Re:Worthless Trademark by Godskitchen · · Score: 1

      What an eloquent lawyer:

      "Your anticipated cooperation is anticipated."

    25. Re:Worthless Trademark by Artifakt · · Score: 1

      Dr. Ann De Wees Voldemort?

      --
      Who is John Cabal?
    26. Re:Worthless Trademark by tsj5j · · Score: 1

      Moderation +3
          30% Informative
          40% Interesting
          30% Funny

      Slashdot math.

    27. Re:Worthless Trademark by eclectus · · Score: 1

      No. We should refer to her as Prince. That should irritate them both.

      --
      This signature is a waste of 42 characters
    28. Re:Worthless Trademark by mpeskett · · Score: 1

      IIRC, you can't be prevented from using your own name, even if someone else has it trademarked.

      If your surname was McDonald for example, you could open a restaurant and call it McDonalds without the more well known chain having a claim against you, so long as you didn't copy any of their other trademarks (like the "golden arches" stylised M)

    29. Re:Worthless Trademark by tibit · · Score: 1

      Interesting: Graeters, an ice cream chain in Ohio, used to sell "low-glycemic" ice cream with trutina dulcem instead of regular sugar. They then have taken if off the shelves. Supposedly this "trutina", whatever it is, is plant-based, tastes sweet, but doesn't get your blood sugar up. I don't know how much truth there is to it -- are there any published papers about that?

      --
      A successful API design takes a mixture of software design and pedagogy.
    30. Re:Worthless Trademark by c6gunner · · Score: 2, Informative

      You don't even need to look at the IP's, just look at the sites themselves. Same template used for all of them. Same grandiose claims with no actual evidence or data.

      I think it's safe to say that Dr. Ann de Wees Allen is a quack. On the other hand, I can't tell what it is, exactly, that she's selling .... so I can't honestly call Ann de Wees Allen a fraud. But I can say with absolute certainty say that Dr. Ann de Wees Allen is definitely a quack.

    31. Re:Worthless Trademark by Hognoxious · · Score: 1

      It's a common misconception that a trademark registration gives you some sort of proprietary right over the mark. People think that it'll allow them to stop anyone from even mentioning the mark.

      Yes, even Barbra Streisand knew better than to try that trick.

      --
      Confucius say, "Find worm in apple - bad. Find half a worm - worse."
    32. Re:Worthless Trademark by KillBillFan · · Score: 1

      that sir is not eloquence!
        That sir is drivel from the mouth of some low level pond scum lawyer in training ...

      --
      ah the joys of a long un-used hotmail email address, now what was that password again? never mind...
    33. Re:Worthless Trademark by SirGeek · · Score: 1

      On a sidenote, for hilarity's sake, let's refer to her as "She Who Cannot Be Named."

      What about calling her Volda-tort ?

    34. Re:Worthless Trademark by Mistlefoot · · Score: 1

      David Wilcox, a prominent Canadian blues artist from the 80's was not allowed to use his name when he toured the US, or sold albums in the US, as someone else had already trademarked the name David Wilcox (an American musician).

    35. Re:Worthless Trademark by Inner_Child · · Score: 1

      You are so full of Dr. Ann de Wees Allen...

      --
      Today is red jello day - all workers must eat all of their red jello. Failure to comply will result in five demerits.
    36. Re:Worthless Trademark by Jim_Maryland · · Score: 1

      Seem to recall a problem with Nissan, a computer website. The owner's name is Nissan, but had to fight the automobile company over the site for Trademark Infringement, Trademark Dilution and Cyber-Squatting.

    37. Re:Worthless Trademark by InsaneProcessor · · Score: 4, Insightful

      If you do more digging, you will find that this is just a diet product scam operation that they are trying to mainstream to con more of the public.

      --

      Athiesm is a religion like not collecting stamps is a hobby.
    38. Re:Worthless Trademark by KillBillFan · · Score: 1

      Well, they haven't suffered from the slashdot effect yet?

      --
      ah the joys of a long un-used hotmail email address, now what was that password again? never mind...
    39. Re:Worthless Trademark by Scaba · · Score: 1

      IIRC, you can't be prevented from using your own name, even if someone else has it trademarked.

      UDRC, because you can be

    40. Re:Worthless Trademark by Obfuscant · · Score: 1
      ...as someone else had already trademarked the name David Wilcox (an American musician).

      IANAL, but I believe this issue is based on union requirements, not trademarks. At least for the Screen Actor's Guild. Michael J. Fox talks about thi s in one of his biographies. SAG wouldn't let him be "Michael Fox" the actor because there already was one, so he had to use his middle initial.

    41. Re:Worthless Trademark by KillBillFan · · Score: 1

      She Who Cannot Be Named is a mega dosing vitamin c woo practitioner.

      a scientologist too ...

      --
      ah the joys of a long un-used hotmail email address, now what was that password again? never mind...
    42. Re:Worthless Trademark by jbengt · · Score: 1

      McDonald's actually sued a donut shop owned by someone named McDonald and named of its' owner.
      and lost.
      Something tells me that had he been in the business of selling hamburgers instead of donuts, Mr McDonald would have lost to the big corporation.

    43. Re:Worthless Trademark by oh-dark-thirty · · Score: 1

      It has been my experience that companies whose name combines some form of the word 'nutrition' with some form of the word 'laboratory' are, in general, quackery.

    44. Re:Worthless Trademark by mattack2 · · Score: 1

      Actually, Michael J. Fox's middle initial is "A", but he didn't want to be known as "Michael A. Fox".

                                            -someone who has far too much trivia stuck in my brain

    45. Re:Worthless Trademark by mattack2 · · Score: 1

      At first I thought you were talking about Truvia, which is recent (at least mainstream commercially).

      But googling "trutina dulcem" shows a bunch of results, yet mostly people questioning about it and various health food sources.

    46. Re:Worthless Trademark by Stachybotris · · Score: 1

      Aside from all being hosted on the same server, well, DiG says the PTR is for 'mail.fourguysfromtampa.com' and that the nameservers belong to Datapipe. So she's got one IIS system hosting multiple copies of the same crap, never asked her hosting company / DNS holder to update the PTRs, and hasn't made any effort to customize her 404 pages. Your point being? (I kid).

      I'm actually a little surprised she didn't invoke John Dozier to protect her precious IP claims...

    47. Re:Worthless Trademark by Walt+Dismal · · Score: 1

      I have trademarked the word 'quack', patented the 'one-click quack', and plan to sue you for infringement, sir. Also, I am descended from royalty. Cease and desist or I shall be forced to make you eat glycemic high fructose corn syrup bicycle tires.

    48. Re:Worthless Trademark by Patch86 · · Score: 1

      You don't need to trademark your name for that. That comes right under the normal misrepresentation of goods laws (or whatever trade laws are local to you), not to mention somewhere within the libel/defamation/lieing-about-a-person-in-some-way laws.

    49. Re:Worthless Trademark by sco08y · · Score: 1

      Let's keep in mind that she in a field that is absolutely dominated by fakes and scams. Looking at the list of offenders, though, she is clearly going after companies that are claiming that she endorsed her product. Her actual pattern of legal action makes perfect sense, it's just that the wording on the page is overly broad. But that's probably a necessary level of intimidation given the folks she's dealing with.

      So it seems like she knows the legal side of her business, whether the science is up to scratch is another matter entirely...

    50. Re:Worthless Trademark by tibit · · Score: 1

      No, they specifically mentioned "trutina dulcem", and that it was of a plant/fruit origin. The products with it were available for, IIRC, less than a year.

      Graeter's is otherwise a reputable company, perhaps someone tipped them off that they have been had.

      --
      A successful API design takes a mixture of software design and pedagogy.
    51. Re:Worthless Trademark by sabt-pestnu · · Score: 1

      A flaw in his business planning. He should have had the trademark in his own name, and licensed it to his own company for a nominal consideration. ... or sold the trademark to himself before he lost his 51% in the company.

      Ah, well. He probably simply wasn't old and paranoid enough when it happened.

    52. Re:Worthless Trademark by bwcbwc · · Score: 1

      Well, it does have some value in blocking competitors from selling nutritional supplements using her name. But unless Nutrilab is a lot bigger than it appears, they can't afford to sue _everybody_ who mentions her name. It might be worth fighting this simply to reduce a public menace.

      --
      We are the 198 proof..
    53. Re:Worthless Trademark by sabt-pestnu · · Score: 1

      ...And who got as much recognition through the meme of "the artist formerly known as" as from the name he was formerly known as....

    54. Re:Worthless Trademark by bickerdyke · · Score: 1

      Best PR-move ever!

      Even if YOU are not allowed to use your old name anymore, you can make the public keep on using it by refusing to pick a new one.

      --
      bickerdyke
    55. Re:Worthless Trademark by Sique · · Score: 2, Interesting

      Another famous case once lead to the "Audi" brand.

      The founder of Audi, August Horch, was voted out of the board of his former company, Horch of Zwickau. So for his next company, he translated his name from German (Horch! = Hear!) to Latin, and thus Audi was born.

      --
      .sig: Sique *sigh*
    56. Re:Worthless Trademark by ender89 · · Score: 1

      are you not a fan of Dr. Nakimats? Creator of the floppy disk and owner of 3000 japanese patents (note: 3000 japanese patents apparently = .5 partially filled in US patents for established products that were discarded along with McDonalds leftovers)? Well, I think that what the whole article is about is her poor word choice. According to her statement, slashdot will be receiving quite the letter for this article when it clearly doesn't violate the trademark. Its amusing, like a someone apparently taking the sentence "the pen is mightier than the sword" literally. I don't think anyone here actually thinks she misunderstands the scope of her trademark, its just amusing that she made such a wide claim when she really meant was "don't use my name for products, I'll get you."

    57. Re:Worthless Trademark by Anachragnome · · Score: 1

      "Notice anything peculiar about the IP-number?"

      No, I didn't, other then that they are all the same.

      But I'll tell you what I did notice...this woman is nuts.

      Edible computer chips...read the whole website. Completely and irrevocably nuts.

    58. Re:Worthless Trademark by Dabido · · Score: 1

      Worst example you could have gave. MacDonalds (The Golden Arches) was kept out of Tasmania (in Australia) for a number of years as someone was already using 'MacDonald' as a name for their own hamburger joint. Not sure if the Tasmanian MacDonalds ended up shutting down, being bought out or what, but both the Golden Arches MacDonalds and the Tasmanian MacDonalds used the surnames of the people who started the business. Trade Marks are there to stop confusion, therefore a Trade Marked name can stop someone with the same name from entering the market in a similar/same field. You can however operate in unrelated fields, such as MacDonald Helicopters or MacDonald Sports Wear without having trouble from the Restaurant Chain bothering you. David Tennant also changed his last name for Acting work because in Scotland whoever uses a name in acting first gets to keep that name and any other actor has to legally get another name. (Not sure on the law in other countries).

      --
      Sure enough, the cow costume was hanging up next to the superhero outfit and sailors uniform. (S,Spud)
    59. Re:Worthless Trademark by RockDoctor · · Score: 1

      On a sidenote, for hilarity's sake, let's refer to her as "She Who Cannot Be Named."

      Oh dammit, there we go again. After all the effort people went to to get Chthulu back to sleep again, and you've got him stirring in his slumber.

      Don't you know how difficult it is to get virgins (in thought as well as in deed) to the tops of volcanoes these days?

      --
      Birds are not dinosaur descendants;birds are dinosaurs, for all useful meanings of "birds", "are" and "dinosaurs"
  2. So, I guess now by Ecuador · · Score: 3, Funny

    we can't just type "Dr. Ann De Wees Allen is a hoot", we have to type "Dr. Ann De Wees Allen(TM) is a hoot" ?

    --
    Violence is the last refuge of the incompetent. Polar Scope Align for iOS
    1. Re:So, I guess now by davmoo · · Score: 4, Informative

      "Dr. Ann De Wees Allen is a blathering idiot" would be more correct. She'll probably get her own talk show and then run for President in 2012.

      --
      I want a new quote. One that won't spill. One that don't cost too much. Or come in a pill.
    2. Re:So, I guess now by vlm · · Score: 1

      I believe you need to use the actual tm symbol not just (tm).

      http://www.fileformat.info/info/unicode/char/2122/index.htm

      --
      "Science flies us to the moon. Religion flies us into buildings." - Victor Stenger
    3. Re:So, I guess now by .tekrox · · Score: 1

      You forgot a disclaimer,

      "Dr. Ann Wees Allen" is a registered trademark of Dr. AW Allen

    4. Re:So, I guess now by Nikker · · Score: 1

      You would only get in trouble if you type "I am Dr. Ann De Wees Allen and I state that I am a hoot"

      --
      A loop, by its nature, continues. If that didn't make sense, start reading this sentence again.
    5. Re:So, I guess now by tepples · · Score: 1

      This code point is not in the subset of Unicode accepted by Slashdot's anti-crapflood filter.

    6. Re:So, I guess now by Ellie+K · · Score: 1

      This code point is not in the subset of Unicode accepted by Slashdot's anti-crapflood filter.

      Confirmed by my best efforts in the first reply to this silly story way up top. Tried
      HTML Entity (decimal) & # 8 4 8 2;
      HTML Entity (hex) & # x 2 1 2 2;
      HTML Entity (named) & trade;
      and several others from the http://fileformat.info/... page, but none are

      accepted by Slashdot's anti-crapflood filter

      per tepples.

      --
      tempus fugit
    7. Re:So, I guess now by XxtraLarGe · · Score: 1

      I say we invalidate the trademark by making it common usage, like let's say "I ate a whole bunch of bran fiber cereal, now I gotta take a Dr. Ann De Wees Allen."

      --
      Taking guns away from the 99% gives the 1% 100% of the power.
    8. Re:So, I guess now by misexistentialist · · Score: 1

      It would makes sense for that symbol to be forbidden, since if it were potentially trademarked it would expand infinitely.

    9. Re:So, I guess now by blair1q · · Score: 1

      That would be fair use. As would "Dr. Ann De Wees Allen is a flaming egomaniac and snake-oil peddler."

    10. Re:So, I guess now by UnknownSoldier · · Score: 1

      Nah, just...

      "This post brought to you by the letters 'D','r', 'A', 'n', 'n', 'D', 'e', 'W', 'e', 'e', 's', 'A', 'l', 'l', 'e', and 'n', and your favorite Trademark Troll.

    11. Re:So, I guess now by GameboyRMH · · Score: 1

      filiforms and followers to try to pass a catheter

      I didn't understand a word of that.

      poked them through the urethra into the rectum

      OH GOD I UNDERSTOOD THAT! *vomitstorm*

      --
      "When information is power, privacy is freedom" - Jah-Wren Ryel
  3. hmm by Essequemodeia · · Score: 2, Informative

    My friend Sony Peterson told me this kind of thing is starting to gain traction.

    1. Re:hmm by kanweg · · Score: 1

      He'd be in real trouble if his name were Sony Philips.

      Bert

    2. Re:hmm by KillBillFan · · Score: 1

      that's his middle name you insensitive clod!

      --
      ah the joys of a long un-used hotmail email address, now what was that password again? never mind...
  4. Skinny "Science" by eldavojohn · · Score: 4, Informative

    She has two patents that appear to show both what is wrong with America's diet mentality and the patent system all at once.

    She's basically pimping out arginine as a panacea (from increased sexual performance to weight-loss). Just read about her wondrous achievements on Skinny Science Corporation: A Leading Biomedical Research Company. Never have I seen the word "science" so abused and raped by words around it. And it doesn't stop there. Google her name or "skinny science" and you're left with a plethora of bullshit sites with her vapid stare hawking complete medical farces designed to prey on the obese. Surprise surprise, she wants it to be illegal for you to talk about her and these sites.

    Does anybody know how she got the prefix of "Dr."?

    --
    My work here is dung.
    1. Re:Skinny "Science" by Nikker · · Score: 1

      I'm sure you can trademark pretty much anything since it's just a representation of an entity and not a literal meaning. I would guess I could trademark "Pope Nikker" and not have to actually be identified as such by the Vatican.

      --
      A loop, by its nature, continues. If that didn't make sense, start reading this sentence again.
    2. Re:Skinny "Science" by Haedrian · · Score: 1

      Does anybody know how she got the prefix of "Dr."?

      Maybe her parents named her "Dr. Ann" ?

    3. Re:Skinny "Science" by MMC+Monster · · Score: 1

      How about we refer to Dr. Ann De Wees Allen as "The quack who shall not be named"?

      BTW, wonder how long before this article is the first hit when people google her?

      --
      Help! I'm a slashdot refugee.
    4. Re:Skinny "Science" by gatzke · · Score: 1

      There are plenty of places online selling Doctorates.

      One classic claims to convert your "life experiences" into credit for a doctorate, no classes needed.

      Heck, you can even become a pope online: http://jubal.westnet.com/hyperdiscordia/popecard.html

    5. Re:Skinny "Science" by Kikuchi · · Score: 1

      I went to this site and
      "Oh my god, it's full of ®"

      --
      There's no scientific consensus that life is important.
    6. Re:Skinny "Science" by julesh · · Score: 2, Informative

      Does anybody know how she got the prefix of "Dr."?

      According to the bio on her web site, she's a "Board Certified Doctor of Naturopathy". This appears to mean she has completed a level of education equivalent to a doctorate in most other fields, although she doesn't state where she received the qualification.

    7. Re:Skinny "Science" by Ambiguous+Coward · · Score: 1

      Google her name

      Can't, I'm not allowed. :(

      --
      Their may be a grammatical error, misspeling, or evn a typo in this post.
    8. Re:Skinny "Science" by Improv · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Unfortunately, in the US we don't tend to protect terms very much - this is an area where we don't get the nuances of wanting political or personal expression to be relatively unconstrained versus the desire to ensure honesty in certain areas worked out correctly. Chances are somebody made up a board (maybe her?) and declared her to be a doctor - I suspect that using the title of doctor in that way is legal in most states.

      I think occasionally one finds the term "Engineer" protected by law.

      --
      For every problem, there is at least one solution that is simple, neat, and wrong.
    9. Re:Skinny "Science" by julesh · · Score: 1

      Unfortunately, in the US we don't tend to protect terms very much - this is an area where we don't get the nuances of wanting political or personal expression to be relatively unconstrained versus the desire to ensure honesty in certain areas worked out correctly. Chances are somebody made up a board (maybe her?) and declared her to be a doctor - I suspect that using the title of doctor in that way is legal in most states

      According to her site, she's based in DC, and judging by wikipedia's article on naturopathy it is considered a protected profession there, so I assume she has followed the full process to get that title and isn't violating state law.

    10. Re:Skinny "Science" by daveime · · Score: 1

      Don't you have to chop off the existing one's head with a heavy sword and go through all that lightning and screaming bit first ?

    11. Re:Skinny "Science" by daveime · · Score: 2, Funny

      Yes, but he's a Doctor of Everything. She's a Doctor of Nothing.

      (Slashdot idly passing the time away. It's been 1 minute since you last successfully posted a comment. Hah).

    12. Re:Skinny "Science" by Schemat1c · · Score: 1

      I went to this site [skinnysciencecoffee.com] and
      "Oh my god, it's full of ®"

      She actually has trademarked the phrase "Certified Authentic"

      This gives me an idea..

      I have a 12 inch penis®

      --

      "Nobody knows the age of the human race, but everybody agrees that it is old enough to know better." - Unknown
    13. Re:Skinny "Science" by KillBillFan · · Score: 1

      Sir
      I counted 12 ®'s ... is that spelled "arse"?

      from the look of that chair Dr. Ann de Wees Allen® is sitting in on the Dr. Ann de Wees Allen® web site ... Dr. Ann de Wees Allen® probably has a big one on it too ... ®'s , that is.

      --
      ah the joys of a long un-used hotmail email address, now what was that password again? never mind...
    14. Re:Skinny "Science" by BitZtream · · Score: 1

      Never have I seen the word "science" so abused and raped by words around it.

      Liar. I've seen you post on slashdot before, I'm fairly sure you've seen science raped and abused here without even considering lube.

      --
      Persistent Volume manager for Kubernetes - https://github.com/dwimsey/openshift-pvmanager
    15. Re:Skinny "Science" by amoeba1911 · · Score: 1

      The patent system is so fookered up that they give patents to dumb asses like her. You can't really patent "a way of using an existing drug to cure something" ... if that was the case then Bayer would patent use of Aspirin as a heart attack risk reducer. Yeah... unfortunately for dumb bitch and Bayer, using substance X for cure Y is not patentable.

      The diet mentality in America... now that's even worse. People in this country are told if they want to lose weight they need to: "Eat more diet food! Eat more healthy food! Eat more something else!" ... I sometimes think I'm the only one who can see this: if you're fat as heck, do NOT eat, regardless of "diet" or "healthy" or whatever the hell it is you plan to stick in your face hole, do not stick it in there. For those who say: "Awww... I can't help it, I barely eat anything but I'm still fat! It's my genes!" --- No. Simple conservation of energy, a pound of fat is worth about 3000 calories. From that you can just calculate: if you eat 3000 calories more than what you need in a week then you will gain a pound per week. That's just about 430 extra calories per day.. that's only about 1 scoop of ice cream per day!

    16. Re:Skinny "Science" by CptNerd · · Score: 1

      drann drann?

      duran duran? - Is she hiding something?

      That she's hungry like the wolf?

      --
      By the taping of my glasses, something geeky this way passes
  5. Javascript "Copyright Protect" doesn't do much by pruss · · Score: 2, Funny

    I just typed ctrl-a, ctrl-c, and, poof!, all of the text of the page was in my clipboard. :-)

    1. Re:Javascript "Copyright Protect" doesn't do much by JasonRBlack · · Score: 1

      ^a ^c didn't work for me, maybe it's this lousy IE9 beta. But, I did print to Adobe PDF, and then I could right-click all I want without fear of reprisal! I've been copying and pasting various bits for the past 20 minutes now, just for fun. Guess I should get back to work.

    2. Re:Javascript "Copyright Protect" doesn't do much by El_Muerte_TDS · · Score: 1

      It does stop me from clicking on the scroll bar to scroll.

    3. Re:Javascript "Copyright Protect" doesn't do much by imakemusic · · Score: 1

      DRM in action.

      --
      Brain surgery - it's not rocket science!
    4. Re:Javascript "Copyright Protect" doesn't do much by cmiller173 · · Score: 1

      Or you can surf through a proxy that strips out annoying javascript (like anything that tries to intercept the right click) while leaving useful JS in place.

    5. Re:Javascript "Copyright Protect" doesn't do much by RivenAleem · · Score: 1

      NoScript > Copyright Protect

  6. Recommendations by BoRegardless · · Score: 1

    Hence, even recommending the doctor by name in an email could be considered infringing.

    So I won't recommend her to any other potential clients.

    But, as others note, I can put her name down and put the (TM) trademark symbol up and that is OK, just like when I refer to Sony or 3M.

    Ill thought out in my estimation, though I understand what she is trying to do.

  7. This is nothing new by SpuriousLogic · · Score: 2, Informative

    All kinds of people have tried this in the past, almost always in order to control negative information from being published about them. However, the courts have ALWAYS ruled that a person's name is fair use. She (just like the thousands before her), won't get anywhere with this. Even if a proper name was not fair use, having a trademark does not prevent people from talking about the trademark. At the most, it would prevent someone form using her trademark to infringe on her IP (e.g. counterfeiting). Basically, she's an idiot.

    1. Re:This is nothing new by Arthur+Grumbine · · Score: 1

      However, the courts have ALWAYS ruled that a person's name is fair use.

      This may be true, but this guy's story is an indication of how expensive it can be to defend that fair use.

      --
      Now that I think about it, I'm pretty sure everything I just said is completely wrong.
  8. Who infringes: mother or child? by Palestrina · · Score: 2, Interesting

    Mother names new born daughter "Ann de Wees Allen". Is this trademark infringement? By mother? Child? Or does it require a "Dr."? If so, who infringes, the PhD student? Or the university?

    I think it is bad, as a matter of public policy, to allow trademarks on names. Otherwise I could be sued, since my name is Bob Weir.

    1. Re:Who infringes: mother or child? by vtcodger · · Score: 2, Informative

      ***I think it is bad, as a matter of public policy, to allow trademarks on names.***

      Not really. Where the name is a genuine product like, say Jenny Craig, trademarking offers some protection against folks marketing their own "Jenny Craig" weight loss products unrelated to the original. I don't see a public policy problem with that.

      --
      You can't see ANYTHING from a car, You've got to get out of the goddamned contraption and walk...Edward Abbey
    2. Re:Who infringes: mother or child? by Sonny+Yatsen · · Score: 1

      Nobody infringes. None of the uses are commercial and create a likelihood of confusion as to the source of goods.

      --
      My postings are informational and does not constitute legal advice. Act on it at your risk.
    3. Re:Who infringes: mother or child? by locallyunscene · · Score: 1

      It probably depends if it is considered a famous trademark or not. I was talking to an IP lawyer conversationally this weekend about a similar subject (past slashdot article: a person trying to sell 3rd party software that leverages Ebay advertising their product online.)

    4. Re:Who infringes: mother or child? by Palestrina · · Score: 1

      But that is a trademark on weight loss products. It isn't a trademark on a person's name.

    5. Re:Who infringes: mother or child? by canajin56 · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Being famous only affects whether or not it qualifies for trademark dilution law. Trademark dilution protects you from non-competing uses of your trademark, if your trademark is famous enough that the trademark is associated with your product and nothing else. eBay makes you think of the eBay auction site and nothing else. Pepsi makes you think of the drink, not of anything else. On the other hand, while Apple might make you think of computers, there are many other trademark holders who use Apple in their own markets. So, if some new company starts selling "Apple" stuff they are free as long as it is a different market than existing "Apple" companies. But, you can't make eBay apparel, as that "dilutes" the brand, because the brand would no longer identify one, and only one, product. This is pretty much global, most countries have basically the same law. While, even if your name was "George McDonald", you cannot open a McDonald's restaurant you can probably open a "McDonald's Plumbing". (Probably). Wouldn't protect you from being sued, but you would have the right! Same with if your name is, I don't know, Gerald Ford, you're allowed to call yourself Ford, you're allowed to sell things under the name Ford, you just couldn't sell cars.

      However, whether you're allowed to sell a product under a trademark name, has nothing to do with being able to use it. Even well-known brands that identify a unique source cannot prevent you from using their trademarked name as a name. It would be beyond absurd to have Ford say "You cannot use the name of our company or our car in your consumer reports magazine, unless the review is sufficiently positive" and just block all negative reviews unless they say "A certain car from some manufacturer". That's just stupid (doesn't mean nobody has tried though). So, the thought that a person could ever get in trouble for having the same name is just dumb. Only if they sell a competing product under their own name.

      --
      ASCII stupid question, get a stupid ANSI
  9. Ellie K by Ellie+K · · Score: 2, Interesting

    I'd noticed that Chris Messina, the Open ID advocate and recent or current Google employee, had also trademarked his name recently. He displays it that way on internet profile pages. So far it has mostly been an inconvenience to me, in using the correct mark-up to designate TM whenever I quote him for some OAuth or OpenID article. I'd wondered why he possibly would want to trademark his name. He runs it all together as "chrismessina" or the character decimal code: chrismessina&amp#8482; if I remembered the mark-up, of course!

    --
    tempus fugit
    1. Re:Ellie K by tibit · · Score: 1

      TESS shows no records for "chrismessina" as a registered wordmark.

      Anyway, if he really did it, it'd be a trademark registered for a single purpose only, but it's hard for me to imagine what purpose it may be, not seeing the trademark application itself. Care for a link to it?

      --
      A successful API design takes a mixture of software design and pedagogy.
  10. Comment removed by account_deleted · · Score: 4, Funny

    Comment removed based on user account deletion

  11. Mhmmm by xtracto · · Score: 1

    And, especially don't copy any of the text on her website, because she's using a bit of javascript that will warn you 'Copyright Protect!' if you right click on a link."

    mmm nope, it doesn't... OH you mean I have to disable my NoScript protection...
    *enables javascript in the infomercial page*

    Aaaah, now I see... that kind of reminds me of Snopes... back before I discovered Firefox ;)

    --
    Ubuntu is an African word meaning 'I can't configure Debian'
  12. My Name... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    I don't want to protect my name. She'll be screaming it later.

    1. Re:My Name... by monkeySauce · · Score: 2, Informative

      I would be incredibly turned off if a girl started screaming "Oh, Anonymous Coward!" while we were going at it.

    2. Re:My Name... by blair1q · · Score: 1

      Then why did you check the "protect my name" box?

    3. Re:My Name... by monkeySauce · · Score: 1

      Absolutely irrelevant. From my slashdot bio: "monkey Sauce has nothing to do with squeezing monkeys to obtain sauce, or drilling a hole in them to drain it out, or anything like that. It is more like the sauce that you would put on a monkey sandwich, or the topping commonly used on monkey à la mode."

  13. I think she's about to learn... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

    ...the meaning of the phrase "Streisand effect" :)

    1. Re:I think she's about to learn... by Haedrian · · Score: 1

      I think that was the intention - apparently she's selling a load of crap.

  14. Re:Dr. Ann De Wees Allen is a CUNT!! by vtcodger · · Score: 1

    Isn't that slander (or libel -- I never could keep the two straight)?

    Of course truth is a viable defense (in the US), so maybe you are OK.

    --
    You can't see ANYTHING from a car, You've got to get out of the goddamned contraption and walk...Edward Abbey
  15. Control-A Control-C by drolli · · Score: 1

    Funny how (even if you have javacript turned on, which i usually dont have) easily you can get around seeing these funny messages generated by an incompetent web designer and still copy the text.

    Did i now violate laws? will somebody sue me because i help people to circumvent anything?

    Moreover if not all appearances of a trademark carry a (tm) symbol and it is not mentioned that all appearances of the name relate to the trademark (i dont believe you would find this sentence in every manual if it would not be needed), does this affect the validity of using the term as a trademark?

    Another interesting question is if is a legal difference if i make a insulting remark in relation a trademark or a name.

  16. Quackometer rating for this site by AbbeyRoad · · Score: 1

    http://www.quackometer.net/

    gives it a zero cannard rating. This means her site is not quack.

    I've already complained to the quackometer.net admin about this.

    -paul

    1. Re:Quackometer rating for this site by eth1 · · Score: 1

      Yes, but it also rates Slashdot at zero Canards, so it's obviously full of crap...

    2. Re:Quackometer rating for this site by makomk · · Score: 1

      Sadly, I believe the quackometer can only detect particularly well-known and prolific signs of quackery. Some quacks just can't be detected by mere computer analysis (though the "quantum chocolate" should really be a tip-off).

  17. you're all missing the point... by smalljobbigcheck · · Score: 1

    her bogus trademark attempt is getting her more attention than anything she's done previously... had any of us heard of her before this 'news' item? not a bad return on an investment of a few thousand dollars. thanks, dr. ann van what's her name

  18. She blew it by OhHellWithIt · · Score: 1

    She could at least have gone for the name Jehovah.

    --
    "Who controls the past controls the future. Who controls the present controls the past." -- George Orwell
    1. Re:She blew it by Muad'Dave · · Score: 1

      "He who controls The Spice controls the Universe" -- Paul "Muad'Dib" Atreides

      --
      Tiller's Rule: Never use a word in written form that you've only heard and never read. You will end up looking foolish.
  19. I suppose these are diet-related??? by Kiralan · · Score: 1

    Aside from the confusion of Trademark / Copyright, I find some of her meta-tags interesting:
    'Edible Computer Chips', 'Quantum Chocolate'

    --
    V for Vendetta: People should not be afraid of their governments. Governments should be afraid of their people.
    1. Re:I suppose these are diet-related??? by Mashiki · · Score: 1

      Quantum Chocolate. ^8 in sweetness, with ^64 in fattening power!

      --
      Om, nomnomnom...
  20. MASH humor by dasherjan · · Score: 1

    On the patent for her name. "Current Status: Section 8 and 15 affidavits have been accepted and acknowledged" At least the Section 8 is accurate. Hehe

  21. Old news by brusk · · Score: 1

    Dr. Pepper did the same thing in the 19th century.

    --
    .sig withheld by request
  22. NoScript just fucked Dr. Ann De Wees Allen by Montezumaa · · Score: 2, Funny

    Taken from www.anndeweesallen.com :

    "Known in the industry as the “Alpha Scientist,” Dr. Allen is in the forefront of scientific breakthroughs, including Nanotechnology, NanoMolecules, Quantum Chocolate, Genetic polymorphisms in Dysregulated Arginine Metabolism, Sickle Cell Polymorphisms, Thalassemia, Blind Amino Acid Riders, L-Arginine Isoform Pathways, and Edible Computer Chips."

    Feel free to sue me, bitch, as I have no money nor do I have any property of value. Slashdot is covered under Safe Harbor laws.

    1. Re:NoScript just fucked Dr. Ann De Wees Allen by Shadyman · · Score: 1

      NoScript? What about Control+C? :)

    2. Re:NoScript just fucked Dr. Ann De Wees Allen by Montezumaa · · Score: 1

      You can do that as well, but I am too lazy to take my hand of my mouse.

    3. Re:NoScript just fucked Dr. Ann De Wees Allen by CosmeticLobotamy · · Score: 1

      Holy shit, Quantum Chocolate?! You are too modest, Dr. Allen. You are clearly both the Alpha and Omega Scientist.

    4. Re:NoScript just fucked Dr. Ann De Wees Allen by pregister · · Score: 1

      Hrm. Does this make NoScript or cntl-c technology that allows copyright infringement? Egads.

  23. I am changing my Name to Bill Smith. by jameskojiro · · Score: 1

    And then hiring a lawyer and letting the money roll on in.

    --
    Tsukasa: All I really want, is to be left alone...
  24. Illegal? by Andy+Smith · · Score: 2, Insightful

    She says that using her name would be "illegal". That implies criminal. Isn't trademark infringement a civil matter?

    1. Re:Illegal? by bk2204 · · Score: 1

      Yes. Furthermore, the purpose of a trademark is to prevent confusion in a certain field of endeavor. It's completely acceptable to use a trademark to refer to the entity in question. So if I trademarked "bk2204", it's entirely within your rights to use it in pretty much any context as long as you're actually referring to me, whether or not those references are flattering.

      If you use "bk2204" to say untrue and defamatory things about me, that's libel (or slander), but that's because they're untrue and defamatory. Whether I have a trademark on that name is irrelevant.

    2. Re:Illegal? by julesh · · Score: 2, Interesting

      She says that using her name would be "illegal". That implies criminal. Isn't trademark infringement a civil matter?

      According to dictionary.com, the distinction between "illegal" and "criminal" is that something is illegal if it is in violation of any statute, but criminal if it is in violation of a penal statute.

      So, no, "illegal" does not imply "criminal": criminal is a strict subset of illegal.

  25. The C&D Letter by Dayofswords · · Score: 3, Funny

    This is the last sentence in the C&D letter she sends:

    Your anticipated cooperation is anticipated.

    --
    Someday we'll hit the human carrying capacity. And the band will just play on.
    1. Re:The C&D Letter by webbiedave · · Score: 1

      That line was written by the Department of the Redundancy Department.

    2. Re:The C&D Letter by Runaway1956 · · Score: 1

      Help stamp out repetitive redundancy, completely and totally.

      --
      "Windows is like the faint smell of piss in a subway: it's there, and there's nothing you can do about it." - Charlie Br
    3. Re:The C&D Letter by KillBillFan · · Score: 1

      such drivel from "royalty" ... tsk tsk
      Quotes from her site:

      "LINEAGE of the DE WEES
      ROYAL FAMILY OF ENGLAND"

      "Great, great, great (x 23) granddaughter of Eleanor of Aquitaine, Queen of France and England."

      some of these old crumpets have more nerve than brains

      next I suppose she will want to be referred to as the right royal doctor or some such bullocks ...

      --
      ah the joys of a long un-used hotmail email address, now what was that password again? never mind...
    4. Re:The C&D Letter by theBuddman · · Score: 1

      This is the last sentence in the C&D letter she sends:

      Your anticipated cooperation is anticipated.

      Must've originated in their Department of Redundancy Department...

    5. Re:The C&D Letter by SparkleMotion88 · · Score: 1
    6. Re:The C&D Letter by SleazyRidr · · Score: 1

      Redundant cat is redundant

  26. Edible Computer Chips by AdamsGuitar · · Score: 1

    Has anyone else noticed that at the end of the meta keywords for her page is "Edible Computer Chips"?

    1. Re:Edible Computer Chips by Briareos · · Score: 1

      So what? My university had a press release on edible electronics just last week - not that I'm in a hurry to get a taste of this... :)

      np: DVA - Natty (Kode9 - DJ Kicks)

      --

      "I'm not anti-anything, I'm anti-everything, it fits better." - Sole

    2. Re:Edible Computer Chips by julesh · · Score: 1

      Has anyone else noticed that at the end of the meta keywords for her page is "Edible Computer Chips"?

      Well, that was a mistake. She means "Edible Computer Chips(R)"

      Choice quote:

      While conducting a medical lecture in Japan at the Tokyo Convention Center, Dr. Allen explained that the human brain acts like an "organic computer."

      Dr. Allen pointed out that a prime example of the brain-computer relationship was shown in Rainman, a very popular movie about Kim Peek, a Savant, whose brain works exactly like a computer.

  27. Re:Dr. Ann De Wees Allen is a CUNT!! by LocalH · · Score: 1

    But she does, presumably, have a cunt.

    So, if she claimed libel, wouldn't that mean that she's admitting to being MTF transgender?

    --
    FC Closer
  28. Re:Dr. Ann De Wees Allen is a CUNT!! by sleeping143 · · Score: 1

    This would basically be a written and broadcast media, so it's libel. Slander is for spoken word.

  29. Bad for Business. by cormander · · Score: 1

    I say let her send her cease-and-desist letters. It will only make for less networking on her part, and less business for her as a direct result. She's digging her own grave. The fair use clause in US copywrite law would prevent her from winning most (if not all) lawsuits she files. You can talk about a trademark as long as you don't infringe upon it.

  30. Go for broke: Trademark Muhammad by aapold · · Score: 1
    --
    "Waste not one watt!" - CZ
  31. Hypothetically... by Zorque · · Score: 1

    Would it be libel to say "Dr. Ann De Wees Allen has been raping and killing children for the last 20 years"?

    1. Re:Hypothetically... by julesh · · Score: 1

      Would it be libel to say "Dr. Ann De Wees Allen has been raping and killing children for the last 20 years"?

      No, that would be slander. Libel would involve publishing the comment, say on a popular geek news web site, to people who you do not know directly, like me.

      Unless of course you had good reason to believe the statement to be true.

  32. Isn't it illegal to use government logo's by mike2400 · · Score: 1

    I thought you could not use any federal logos or seals on your website or publication unless you had permission from the government. She has the US Patent and Trademark office logo all over her site. I don't see where she has permission.

  33. Dr. And Do Weezy Alien by Picass0 · · Score: 1

    I'm going to register that and typo squat to the site of my choosing.

  34. Re:Dr. Ann De Wees Allen is a CUNT!! by Hognoxious · · Score: 1

    is a != has a.

    In the first case you use a inheritance, in the second composition.

    --
    Confucius say, "Find worm in apple - bad. Find half a worm - worse."
  35. Try John Doe by EricWright · · Score: 1

    Then, every anonymous lawsuit will infringe on your trademark. That way, you can sue lawyers, who are typically rolling in dough!

  36. Re:Dr. Ann De Wees Allen is a... by XxtraLarGe · · Score: 1

    Isn't that slander (or libel -- I never could keep the two straight)?

    I don't believe so. I think in order for it to rise to the level of libel, it needs to be a claim that could harm their reputation, that would be believed by a reasonable person. So simply calling her a name is not the same as saying she makes her products with slave labor or some other such claim.

    --
    Taking guns away from the 99% gives the 1% 100% of the power.
  37. Billy Joel (R) by whyde · · Score: 1

    Billy Joel has, since a very early time in his career, a registered trademark on his name for the purpose of music. I'm pretty sure he's not going around suing parents who have the audacity to name their kids William Joel, however.

    Look at the album cover of "Billy Joel (R) Greatest Hits" for an example.

  38. Re:Dr. Ann De Wees Allen is a CUNT!! by daveime · · Score: 1

    I think he meant to say "IN MY OPINION"

    Dr. Ann De Wees Allen is a CUNT!!
    Dr. Ann De Wees Allen is a CUNT!!
    Dr. Ann De Wees Allen is a CUNT!!
    Dr. Ann De Wees Allen is a CUNT!!
    Dr. Ann De Wees Allen is a CUNT!!
    Dr. Ann De Wees Allen is a CUNT!!
    Dr. Ann De Wees Allen is a CUNT!!
    Dr. Ann De Wees Allen is a CUNT!!

    There, completely safe from both Libel and Slander in all sensible jurisdictions.

  39. Wrong Mark by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Informative

    The parent post raises a good point but identifies the wrong problem.
     
    Fair use is a defense to infringement, and the only uses I see on agesolutions.com appear to be truthful and factual, relating to Dr. Named's US Patent No. 6608109 expiring no later than 11/20/2011. Indeed, rather than considering this "an entirely valid use of trademark law," I'd see it as an egregious example of bad-faith, improper use of trademark law. Dr. Named's company doesn't appear to market the product with the mark as a brand as such- they seem to use ARGMATRIX- so there's little doubt they registered their mark to bully competitors.
     
    The problem for agesolutions.com is that they infringe an entirely different mark: L-ARGININE M2. At least according to Dr. Named, "M2" has no significance in the industry or with respect to the product, and as such, it's protectable.

  40. NSFW website? by karlandtanya · · Score: 1

    Webwasher flags it as something I should not be looking at.

    I wonder what Dr. Allen is up to...

    --
    "Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, it doesn't go away." - Philip K. Dick
    1. Re:NSFW website? by julesh · · Score: 1

      Webwasher flags it as something I should not be looking at.

      I wonder what Dr. Allen is up to...

      Said website is perfectly SFW. Webwasher is clearly a heap of shit.

  41. Re:Go for broke: Trademark Muhammad by jameskojiro · · Score: 1

    Hmm, that is better than bill smith, then no one will even be able to draw a picture of me either.... WIN-WIN.

    --
    Tsukasa: All I really want, is to be left alone...
  42. Been there, seen that by mr100percent · · Score: 1

    She's not the first person to do this. OJ Simpson trademarked his name in 1995 after the murder trial

  43. Noscript? by Runaway1956 · · Score: 1

    Dr. Allen's Inspiring Survival Story "The definition of failure is not falling down but staying down." Dr. Ann de Wees Allen's Story of Survival Washington, D.C. One morning, in 1983, I woke up unable to swallow. By the end of the day I could not even swallow water. My fiancée Jeff and my mother had to jointly "drag" me to the hospital emergency room because I kept saying nothing was wrong. Jeff replied, "Then why can't you swallow?" And I said, "Oh, for heavens sake, something small is stuck in my esophagus and I'm sure it will pop out." It didn't pop out. They admitted me to the emergency room of the local hospital, and by the next day they had scheduled surgery. I awoke in Intensive Care to a nightmare. I was lying on a table and nine hours had lapsed. Nine hours? Nine hours for just a little something stuck in my throat? What went wrong? I felt cold and then the pain began to wash over me. I looked down at my body and saw huge metal staples covering my torso. The staples appeared to be holding me together. Inch-wide incisions ran the entire circumference of my body - somewhat like a peach that had been sliced in half and opened up. Another incision ran from my sternum to my naval. An incision ran down the side of my nose and a tube had been inserted and sewed to the skin. Two large tubes ran into my side and they also were attached to the skin. I was too frightened to speak. The surgeon appeared and said, "I'm sorry." I said, "About what?" He replied, "About the cancer." "What cancer?" "You have stomach and esophageal cancer and we have removed your distal esophagus, stomach, rib cage, and diaphragm portions." I couldn't think of a thing to say. My brother Philip came in and calmly took my hand. I hadn't seen my brother cry since we were children. That's when I "borrowed" his Zorro cape to use as a tablecloth for my doll and in the process ruined it. I was diagnosed with stomach and esophageal cancer. I was the youngest person ever diagnosed with this type of cancer. The survival rate was less than 2%. How could I be dying of cancer? I was young, healthy, and very athletic. I had never smoked a cigarette, didn't drink anything other than an occasional glass of wine, jogged every day, and perhaps more importantly, had no history of cancer in my family. In college, years earlier, I received a scholarship in Environmental Chemistry and Engineering from the Environmental Protection Agency. This scholarship included working on EPA contracts in an environmental research laboratory. The longest research project I worked on was a toxic guidelines study of polychlorinated byphenols (PCBs). Every day for two years, I condensed samples to extract PCBs from them. Following the two-year study, the EPA banned PCBs from the market labeling them as carcinogens. I had breathed PCBs every day for two years. The pain was relentless and agonizing. I didn't know that a human could survive such pain. It took every ounce of strength left in my body to get through the day. I was receiving morphine shots in my legs every two hours, twenty-four hours a day. I was still begging for more. This went on for thirty-two days. I could not even have a sip of water during this time. My mouth and lips craved the sensation of liquid. Hunger, pain, and thirst were my constant companions. It was difficult to think of anything else. After over a month of this torment, the doctors came into my room to announce it was time to test the new system they had constructed inside me. They took me downstairs to "test the new system." I felt horrible and dehumanized. I looked like a Frankenstein monster. Visitors in the hospital elevator and hall were staring at me. They had given me an extra morphine shot so they could hang me upside down like a bat and take pictures of the "new setup." My "new setup" was designed to replace my regular organs. I made the mistake of asking the technician what would happen if this "new setup" didn't work as planned. He said, "Well, you will die." I was impressed with his subtlety. The surgeon appeared all aglow a

    --
    "Windows is like the faint smell of piss in a subway: it's there, and there's nothing you can do about it." - Charlie Br
    1. Re:Noscript? by The+Wild+Norseman · · Score: 2, Funny

      Jeff replied, "Then why can't you swallow?"

      Jeff, buddy, I've been asking my wife the same thing for years.

      --
      "A government is a body of people usually -- notably -- ungoverned." -Shepherd Book
  44. TLDR by Runaway1956 · · Score: 1

    No, of course I didn't read that self aggrandizing wall of text. I read just enough to realize the broad is probably bat-shit crazy. Oh - wait. That was the point of TFA, right?

    --
    "Windows is like the faint smell of piss in a subway: it's there, and there's nothing you can do about it." - Charlie Br
    1. Re:TLDR by turtledawn · · Score: 1

      Holy crap, I did just read it, and she's nutters.

      --
      Uh, "if it looks roughly mouse-shaped according to my infra-red sensitive pit, eat it"? --Chris Burke 09-08-10
    2. Re:TLDR by The+Wild+Norseman · · Score: 1

      Yeah, my previous comment notwithstanding, I read the whole thing too and I'm thinking she should have spent a few bucks on a Ghost Writer(TM). Her prose is absolutely horrid.

      --
      "A government is a body of people usually -- notably -- ungoverned." -Shepherd Book
  45. Re:Dr. Ann De Wees Allen is a CUNT!! by makomk · · Score: 1

    It's an opinion - absolutely no factual content whatsoever - so it doesn't count as either slander or libel in most countries, as I understand it.

  46. Re:Dr. Ann De Wees Allen is a... by Runaway1956 · · Score: 1

    Well, there is no "proof" that she uses slave labor and child labor to produce her products. But, the investigators haven't complete their investigation yet, either.

    --
    "Windows is like the faint smell of piss in a subway: it's there, and there's nothing you can do about it." - Charlie Br
  47. Selling Ann de Wees Allen Products without paying by billstewart · · Score: 1

    At my website, 127.0.0.1:80, also doing business as Localhost Industries, we sell an extensive line of famous Ann Dewees Allen products - we've got sugar replacements, L-Arginine used for sexual potency, Nitric Oxide products used for entertainment and research only, and our famous Anne deWees Allen Nigerian Herbal Formula.

    Remember, if you can't get it at Localhost, it's Just No Fun!

    --

    Bill Stewart
    New Fast-Compression-only CPR http://preview.tinyurl.com/dy575ks
  48. The Dr. Ann De Wees Allen Game. by Drakkenmensch · · Score: 1

    You just lost it.

    Announcing to the world that you do not want your name published anywhere is exactly like playing The Game. You make everyone lose just by mentioning it!

    Oh, and you just lost that, too.

  49. Dr. Ann De Wees Allen is People! by Culture20 · · Score: 1

    Almost forgot: she's also a Nutritional Meal Replacement Powder

  50. Too Late by fuzznutz · · Score: 1

    On a sidenote, for hilarity's sake, let's refer to her as "She Who Cannot Be Named."

    Sorry... I already trademarked that one in tribute to my ex-wife.

  51. Re:Selling Ann de Wees Allen Products without payi by dgatwood · · Score: 1

    You should see all the things sold by my localhost server. Ads from dozens of different ad networks get served from there while using my home network.

    Wait, your ad blocking localhost violates my trrademark on localhost! How dare you usurp the time-honored name! My lawyers will be contacting you shortly (and laughing, no doubt).

    --

    Check out my sci-fi/humor trilogy at PatriotsBooks.

  52. Re:Adobe PDF by AvitarX · · Score: 1

    Note: as a commercial printer, please take the advice from above.

    Though the worse is PDFs saved out of photoshop, so Adobe alone is not enough.

    --
    Wow, sent an e-mail as suggested when clicking on "use classic" banner, and got a fast response that addressed my msg
  53. Copy Protection! by WDancer · · Score: 1

    Oh look! View page source, Ctrl+U.

    1. Re:Copy Protection! by Esospopenon · · Score: 1

      The function that displays "Copyright Protect!" is called jk(). "Just Kidding"?

  54. Re:Adobe PDF by djdanlib · · Score: 1

    Use Adobe(R) PDF. If you and your friends don't, how will all those updater-updating-installer developers find work??

  55. She thinks Coffee makes you fat - FOX News Video by Sembiance · · Score: 1

    She thinks Coffee (by itself, pure coffee) makes you fat.

    She did an interview to fox news (big surprise) here: http://www.myfoxorlando.com/dpp/health/111709-Does-coffee-make-you-fat

    Conveniently she has a patent on something that she claims prevents coffee from making you fat so you can continue drinking it.

  56. "They" call her the Alpha Scientist! by Push+Latency · · Score: 1

    It just gets better! From "medkb.com"

    "Shalom, they call me the Alpha Scientist. I own a nutraceuticals company; I own a Human testing facility in the University of Florida and have hundreds of researchers working under me. I have spent 24 years of my life in medicine quantifying scientific and medical breakthroughs. As you have heard I received the first glycemic patent worldwide and I received the first patent on L- Arginine in the production of the anti-aging hormones for growth hormone and testosterone, which are the main mechanism of aging.

    I am a multi-millionaire many times over for my patents. One of my patents was named breakthrough product of the year by success magazine and I beat Bill Gates out that year for the award. It is always nice to beat Bill Gates at anything I think the message I want to deliver is: I am head of the Agel medical advisory board, the Scientific advisory board so anything that goes in your mouth is my responsibility. I take that real seriously. So in order for you to trust the products, you need to trust me. And in order to trust me you need to know who I am and what I stand for. That is the most important thing..."

    It goes on for quite a while beyond that, and gets progressively funnier. LINK

  57. Time to milk some LOLs from this lolcow by GameboyRMH · · Score: 1

    I should take a mirror of her entire site, put it in a zip file, make a torrent of it, put it on TPB, and then notify her about it using a dummy email address, causing the lolcow to get more pissed off, then she'd send a C&D or DMCA takedown to TPB, causing more Streisand effect and more lulz, then someone would submit a story to Idle about the lulz that ensue, causing more Streisand effect and more lulz, then everyone would put tinyurl links to the torrent in their sigs, causing the lolcow to get more pissed off, then she'd send a C&D/DMCA takedown to Slashdot, which would be reported in another article, which would create more lulz and more Streisand effect, then 4chan would pick it up and start harassing the lolcow, causing her to get more pissed off, then she'd send a C&D/DMCA takedown to 4chan, causing more Streisand effect and more lulz, then comedy sites would pick it up, causing the lolcow to get more pissed off...

    I've either invented a perpetual motion lulz engine or a fusion lulz bomb. Either way, there are good times to be had!

    --
    "When information is power, privacy is freedom" - Jah-Wren Ryel
  58. Ivana Trump by 21mhz · · Score: 1

    Ivana Trump regards her name as a trademark, too.

    --
    My exception safety is -fno-exceptions.
    1. Re:Ivana Trump by Ossifer · · Score: 1

      Only when someone tries to launch a competing fashion accessories product line under that name, solely to garner interest on the confusion/controversy.

      Every wonder why Ms. Suhonen didn't call her line Paola, or Suhonen?

    2. Re:Ivana Trump by 21mhz · · Score: 1

      Only when someone tries to launch a competing fashion accessories product line under that name, solely to garner interest on the confusion/controversy.

      I don't think there was much confusion in her home market back in 1998, which BTW predates the trademark registration for fashion purposes by Ivana Trump.

      --
      My exception safety is -fno-exceptions.
    3. Re:Ivana Trump by Ossifer · · Score: 1

      And she was using this trademark "Ivana", and nothing else in 1998? Article does not state (it's a typical "Big bad Yankee telling us innocent little guys what to do" piece).

      And when did she start using this trademark in the US, where the conflict is, where the fashion show is, where the lawsuit was filed? Article suggests it was recent...

  59. McDonald's by frozentier · · Score: 1

    You know, McDonald's has their name trademarked. However, the companies that put out phone books don't have to get prior written permission to list them in the phone book. I don't need prior written permission to mention on a blog that I bought a Big Mac and it was cold (thought they'd probably throw a slander charge at me). Mentioning a trademarked name isn't against the law.

    1. Re:McDonald's by Ossifer · · Score: 1

      No, but try opening a restaurant called Mc- or Mac-Anything...

  60. Your anticipated cooperation is anticipated! by amoeba1911 · · Score: 1
    Here is my anticipated response that you were all anticipating:

    Dr. Ann de Wees Allen anticipatively anticipates the anticipation of the anticipatable anticipators!

    Funny aside: Dr. Ann de Wees Allen sounds to me like one of those dumb ass "researchers" who became head of a lab not because they know shit, but because they knew the right people. I bet the only thing she's good at is taking credit for other people's work. Way to go Dr. Ann de Wees Allen... you win the prestigious fucktard award for September 20th, 2010. Congratulations!

  61. Newton's third law of motion by Ossifer · · Score: 1

    "To every action there is always an equal and opposite reaction"

    This is clearly in reaction to The Pirate Bay's page on threatening letters they've received.

  62. Ohoh by wiedzmin · · Score: 1

    If this catches on - Facebook is screwed.

    --
    Bow before me, for I am root.
  63. Contact by nam207 · · Score: 1

    Anybody find her contact page ironic? http://www.anndeweesallen.com/Contact.htm She claims she receives 100K email a month, so don't email her about personal question. That is like 3,300 email a day, many well known celebrities would not receive that many emails in a day. Btw, her Wot rating is very poor: http://www.mywot.com/en/scorecard/anndeweesallen.com

  64. I talked to the Nameless One by equex · · Score: 1

    I mailed this to them after gleaning over this thread quickly. I know it wasn't really that well put together but I spent like 1 minute on it. It's funny nonetheless:

    Subject: Do you realize that your lawyers has screwed you ?
    Trademarks doesn't work the way you think. Go to the quackery exposure site and check your self:
    http://www.quackometer.net/?suspectquack=Dr+Ann+de+Wees+Allen
    Stop encumbering the patent office with useless quackery. It's supposed to handle real patents.
    Your lawyers should have warned you that your trademark in not enforceable the way you think it can. The only thing it protects you from is trying to sell a similar service with your name as the seller. And even then it's going to be hard. Hahahaha.

    Response:
    Subject: Re: Do you realize that your lawyers has screwed you ?

    WRONG.

    WE HAVE FILED 32 MILLION DOLLARS OF LAWSUITS - AND NOT LOST ONE !!!

    Epic. So they managed to sue other people than those trying to leech off her name or what ?

    --
    Can I light a sig ?
  65. Nom...nomina... by BillX · · Score: 1

    Wow. This might be the most literal example of the nominative use defense in trademark infringement claims.

    --
    Caveat Emptor is not a business model.
  66. Lost from the history, then? by WWWWolf · · Score: 1

    She's made it clear that she's trademarked her name and using it is 'illegal... without prior written permission.'

    Last week, like just about everyone else, I was playing through the Halo: Reach campaign. Somehow, I got thinking of a very curious fact: the game is set in 26th century, and it totally appears as if the Red Cross had ceased to exist at that point of history. Really. You see medical supplies marked with red "H" or Staff of Aesculapius. But not red cross.

    Of course, the real reason why this happens is that Red Cross objects to the use of red crosses on video game health-kits and like. But the thought that the Red Cross had completely disappeared obviously came to my mind - there's no mention of the organisation anywhere, and all of the symbols are conspicuously missing. You go around a city, looking to stop invaders in a bloody hospital and you're glad your navigation AI tells where you should go, because it's kind of harder to identify the building from a helicopter...

    I guess the moral of the parable is that if you don't want your name to remain, the chances are that it won't.

  67. Dr. Ann de Wees Allen by vuffi_raa · · Score: 1

    Dr. Ann de Wees Allen is an idiot and doesn't realize that I can say Dr. Ann de Wees Allen without Dr. Ann de Wees Allen having anything to say about it. The only way that Dr. Ann de Wees Allen can complain is if I were to mislead people using the name Dr. Ann de Wees Allen or to claim that Dr. Ann de Wees Allen supports a product or to claim Dr. Ann de Wees Allen as a product name. Dr. Ann de Wees Allen really wouldn't have any recourse if Dr. Ann de Wees Allen was mentioned in any context outside of a Dr. Ann de Wees Allen website or a Dr. Ann de Wees Allen product line.
    But I would never use Dr. Ann de Wees Allen's name without her permission so Dr. Ann de Wees Allen can feel safe.