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The Upcoming Windows 8.1 Apocalypse

arglebargle_xiv (2212710) writes "As most people will have heard, Microsoft will end support for anyone who hasn't upgraded to Win8.1 Update 1 on May 8. What fewer people have heard is that large numbers of users can't install the 8.1 Update, with over a thousand messages in this one thread alone, and that's for tech geeks rather than home users who won't find out about this until their PC becomes orphaned on May 8. Check your Windows Update log, if you've got a "Failed" entry next to KB2919355 then your PC will also become orphaned after May 8."

293 comments

  1. Lamepocalypse by Baby+Duck · · Score: 5, Insightful

    As far as apocalypses go, that's one lame-sounding apocalypse.

    --

    "Love heals scars love left." -- Henry Rollins

    1. Re:Lamepocalypse by shadowrat · · Score: 5, Funny

      As far as apocalypses go, that's one lame-sounding apocalypse.

      how many heads were on that beast in revelations? about 8.1?

    2. Re:Lamepocalypse by Savage-Rabbit · · Score: 2

      As far as apocalypses go, that's one lame-sounding apocalypse.

      how many heads were on that beast in revelations? about 8.1?

      Seven heads, ten horns...

      --
      Only to idiots, are orders laws.
      -- Henning von Tresckow
    3. Re:Lamepocalypse by Z00L00K · · Score: 2

      I'd rather take the Lordi version: arockalypse.

      --
      If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker would destroy civilization.
    4. Re:Lamepocalypse by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      So stick with Windows 7 until service pack 10 comes out?

    5. Re:Lamepocalypse by roc97007 · · Score: 1

      Especially since, in most cases people did this to themselves. Never ever buy the first version of a Windows release. And if the first version looks Vista-level problematic, approach even the first update cautiously. Everyone knows that by now.

      --
      Oliver's law of assumed responsibility: If you're seen fixing it, you will be blamed for breaking it.
    6. Re:Lamepocalypse by Archangel+Michael · · Score: 1

      Revelation 8:1 When the Lamb opened the seventh seal, there was silence in heaven for about half an hour. And I saw the seven angels who stand before God, and seven trumpets were given to them.

      nothing terrible there :)

      --
      Agent K: A *person* is smart. People are dumb, stupid, panicky animals, and you know it.
    7. Re: Lamepocalypse by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Kinda makes me wish for a Zombie apocalypse :-P

    8. Re:Lamepocalypse by caseih · · Score: 4, Interesting

      Well I did have a choice, true. I could have bought an OEM version of Windows 7 that was more than twice the cost of Windows 8, and cannot ever be moved to new hardware when this computer dies or requires a major upgrade. Or I could buy Windows 8.1 direct from Microsoft for about $100. I knew it had the ridiculous metro start screen, but I knew that Classic Shell could make it close enough to Windows 7 to be workable. And it is. Also Windows 8.1 can be transferred to brand new hardware and reactivated. They loosened up the restrictions some. So faced with this, it wasn't a hard choice to put on Windows 8.1.

      Mind you this situation I was in was precisely engineered by Microsoft to push me in the direction they want me to go. But surely you would do the same, no? Or would you really drop nearly $250 on an operating system?

    9. Re:Lamepocalypse by smash · · Score: 1

      8 (vanilla) is still supported as I understand it. I am still getting updates, anyhow.

      --
      I run: Windows, OS X, Linux, FreeBSD. Just because you have a hammer, doesn't mean everything is a nail.
    10. Re:Lamepocalypse by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      With Revelation 8:1 Update we've restored functionality of noise, so you don't have to suffer in silence for half an hour anymore. Angels have been upgraded with hovering capability to prevent exhaustion from too much standing. The first seven angels to accept the Update will also receive trombones instead of trumpets.

    11. Re:Lamepocalypse by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      They have to do this to keep the pattern

      2000 -ok
      ME -bad
      XP -ok
      Vista -bad
      7 -ok
      8 -bad
      8.1U1 -ok

    12. Re:Lamepocalypse by gtall · · Score: 3, Funny

      Nonsense! Those trumpets were playing "Hey Jude" over, and over, and over, and....

    13. Re:Lamepocalypse by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Revelation 8:1 When the Lamb opened the seventh seal, there was silence in heaven for about half an hour. And I saw the seven angels who stand before God, and seven trumpets were given to them.

      nothing terrible there :)

      Silence in heaven sounds pretty ominous. Like the calm before the storm.

    14. Re:Lamepocalypse by roc97007 · · Score: 2

      I used to have a little fob on my keychain that when pressed would say "yes dear" in a cloying voice. (I'm not kidding. It finally failed and I've been looking for a replacement.) Wife would say something to me in a shrill nagging voice and then have to say "DON'T you reach for your keys!".

      --
      Oliver's law of assumed responsibility: If you're seen fixing it, you will be blamed for breaking it.
    15. Re:Lamepocalypse by cfalcon · · Score: 0

      For the Windows gaming PC, I went with the 250 for an operating system. Mostly because at least it's an operating system, not some crazy mock up like Windows 8. Windows 8 just made me think that Microsoft is fucking insane- the few things written by the GUI designers about how it's for these users and not for these users and they have this model of user types and they want to get their casuals off the desktop or whatfuckingever- just go to hell, guys. Everyone who wants to innovate can be divided cleanly into two camps: people who jump through legal and technical hoops to prevent you from opting out of their bullshit, and those that don't. The folks in the second group normally have something to sell you. The folks in the first group- and that includes Microsoft on all counts and fucking GNOME on some- are arrogant pricks not worth the time of day.

      Quite honestly, the moment I can play games natively under Linux, I'll be full Linux again. And no, WINE and derivatives are not adequate for all of gaming, and very much not the section I use.

    16. Re:Lamepocalypse by operagost · · Score: 5, Funny

      You obviously haven't been in a room with seven trumpet players.

      Disclaimer: I'm a trumpet player.

      --

      Gamingmuseum.com: Give your 3D accelerator a rest.
    17. Re:Lamepocalypse by Penguinisto · · Score: 4, Insightful

      But surely you would do the same, no? Or would you really drop nearly $250 on an operating system?

      ...err, not really. I mean, seriously - my missus looked at the same situation and decided that she really didn't need Windows for anything.

      For my own new laptop, I found my own slightly costlier solution, but it works well for me. It has been working like a champ for almost year now, in spite of the abuse I regularly give it (which is, so far, longer than most laptops hold up under my not-so-tender mercies.) I keep Windows 7 around on a VMWare Fusion partition, but that's about it.

      --
      Quo usque tandem abutere, Nimbus, patientia nostra?
    18. Re:Lamepocalypse by roc97007 · · Score: 5, Informative

      > Or would you really drop nearly $250 on an operating system?

      Oh c'mon, that's FUD and you know it. I build systems as a sideline, and I can buy locally Windows 7 Home Premium for $129 and Windows 7 64 Pro for $159. Amazon has Win 7 64 pro for $138.98. Amazon sells Windows 8 64 Pro for $129.99. For less than $10 more, you can get an operating system that actually works and results in fewer tech support calls to me. It's a good investment.

      Mind you, as an early adopter of Win8, I bought it for $59 when they were trying to promote it, but after upgrading to 8.1 and seeing no relief, I finally system restored my own system back to 7, because I use my computer to do stuff, not to wrestle with operating systems. And there it sits until Microsoft gets their act together. In the meantime, the systems I build still have Windows 7.

      --
      Oliver's law of assumed responsibility: If you're seen fixing it, you will be blamed for breaking it.
    19. Re:Lamepocalypse by smash · · Score: 1

      There will be no further service packs for Windows 7.

      --
      I run: Windows, OS X, Linux, FreeBSD. Just because you have a hammer, doesn't mean everything is a nail.
    20. Re:Lamepocalypse by leuk_he · · Score: 1

      Together with a bunch of XPcaplipse machine the next Sqlslammer work is waiting on the next unpached vlunebility to hit the internet after May 8.

      And from the viewpoint of Slashdot the world as Slashdot knows it. will end without internetnet.

    21. Re:Lamepocalypse by ComputersKai · · Score: 1

      No, I'm pretty sure that was the Windows XP theme

    22. Re:Lamepocalypse by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      When the Lamb opened the seventh seal, he was bound by the shrink-wrapped End User License Agreement.

    23. Re: Lamepocalypse by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I personally never minded vista. It was mainly the poor graphics drivers that hurt it. Once service pack 2 came out, vista ran pretty well. I have family members still using it and it runs just fine. Don't get me wrong I still prefer win7 over vista and win8.anything. My company has told all our clients that we will never support win8.x, only xp and 7. We are hoping that Microsoft learns from the win8 mistakes and make win9 more in the favor of win7. One can hope right?

    24. Re:Lamepocalypse by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      So the the seventh seal are windows 1 to 7 and 8 will be the apocalypse of Windows. If is written in the bible, that must be true!

    25. Re: Lamepocalypse by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      This is starting to look like a Glen Beck YouTube video's comment page. Just replace Windows with Obama and 8.1 with sensible gun regulations.

    26. Re:Lamepocalypse by FatdogHaiku · · Score: 1

      Revelation 8:1 When the Lamb opened the seventh seal, there was silence in heaven for about half an hour. And I saw the seven angels who stand before God, and seven trumpets were given to them.

      nothing terrible there :)

      Wait till you hear them play...

      --
      You have the right to remain sentient. If you give up the right to remain sentient, you will be elected to public office
    27. Re:Lamepocalypse by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Nonsense! Those trumpets were playing "Hey Jude" over, and over, and over, and....

      I'm positive they were playing "Stairway to Heaven"...but the elevator muzak version.

    28. Re:Lamepocalypse by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      umm, i have no issues moving win7 from one PC to another. against the rules, yes, but works every single time.

    29. Re:Lamepocalypse by MouseTheLuckyDog · · Score: 2

      She still your wife?

    30. Re:Lamepocalypse by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      No I wouldn't but then I use linux.

    31. Re:Lamepocalypse by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      How's about $15 for linux mint 16...got lazy and bought a copy of linux format mag for the disk ;)

    32. Re:Lamepocalypse by log0n · · Score: 1

      I know I'm in the minority on this, but Vista was far better than XP.

    33. Re:Lamepocalypse by roc97007 · · Score: 1

      We finally came to an agreement. She nags me less and in return I actually pay attention to what she's saying.

      --
      Oliver's law of assumed responsibility: If you're seen fixing it, you will be blamed for breaking it.
    34. Re:Lamepocalypse by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Quite honestly, the moment I can play games natively under Linux, I'll be full Linux again. And no, WINE and derivatives are not adequate for all of gaming, and very much not the section I use.

      Speaking of lame, buy a damn gaming console already. Pissing $250 away on software is rather counter to the entire fucking point of running an open-source OS. I don't even know why you bother. Just run Windows. You've certainly paid enough for it.

    35. Re:Lamepocalypse by roc97007 · · Score: 1

      I haven't tried Mint. It does sound interesting. I was running Fedora on a laptop for awhile, and it did ok if all you need is the basics -- mail, chat, browser, etc. The only reason I still use Windows is because I use the Adobe Creative Suite extensively, the only choices are Windows and Mac, and since I build my own systems, the only choice is Windows. The day Adobe ports to Linux will be the last day I use Windows. That will be a very happy day.

      --
      Oliver's law of assumed responsibility: If you're seen fixing it, you will be blamed for breaking it.
    36. Re:Lamepocalypse by vux984 · · Score: 1

      ...err, not really. I mean, seriously - my missus looked at the same situation and decided that she really didn't need Windows for anything.

      In my recent experience most "home" users who can make the switch to linux can probably switch to a tablet, and forego a computer entirely.

      For my own new laptop, I found my own slightly costlier solution, but it works well for me. It has been working like a champ for almost year now, in spite of the abuse I regularly give it (which is, so far, longer than most laptops hold up under my not-so-tender mercies.) I keep Windows 7 around on a VMWare Fusion partition, but that's about it.

      So your solution to the windows 7 vs windows 8 price dilemma was to buy a Mac with OSX, then bought VMWare Fusion, and then bought Windows 7 anyway?

      Good job!

    37. Re:Lamepocalypse by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Retail version is indeed a retail version. I updated my motherboard and went from a BIOS+MBR to UEFI+GPT system. The fun started when I forgot to change firmware settings and rebooted in the middle of the windows setup. Few hours later, while trying to activate the updated (over 6GB of downloads, no wonder MS wants to distribute without media) monster the system told me I had installed the update without a valid upgradable operating system at the bottom. Several hours later the activation succeeded only with a phone anyway.
        Even with the retail version, once updates start to accumulate over the original system, the experience can turn painful at some point. There was a time when you only had to show the old operating system install disk to the update setup in order to continue.

    38. Re:Lamepocalypse by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      You do realize that the premium for Macs is considered the cost of the operating system, right? And by that merit, you paid more than $250 for the operating system.

    39. Re:Lamepocalypse by TimMD909 · · Score: 1

      Quick! How many permutations are there for distributing 10 horns over 7 creatures? Bonus credit for My Little Pony Demon animated GIFs.

    40. Re:Lamepocalypse by dkman · · Score: 1

      The anticipation is the worst part.

      --
      I refuse to sign
    41. Re:Lamepocalypse by quonsar · · Score: 1

      I'd do what I did in 2005. Install linux and never look back.

    42. Re: Lamepocalypse by JustOK · · Score: 1

      Sensible guns SHOULD be regulated. Unsensible guns should be allowed to roam free.

      --
      rewriting history since 2109
    43. Re:Lamepocalypse by JustOK · · Score: 1

      People always talk about what's written in the Bible. All the Bibles I've seen have been printed. Haven't found any writing in any of them.

      --
      rewriting history since 2109
    44. Re:Lamepocalypse by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      >I build systems as a sideline, and I can buy locally Windows 7 Home Premium for $129 and Windows 7 64 Pro for $159.

      And they're non-OEM copies that you can move between as many computers as you like, so long as you only have it installed on one at a time?

      I call bullshit. You are quoting the exact version of Windows 7 he said no to.

    45. Re: Lamepocalypse by BryanHelder · · Score: 0

      And never play games again...

    46. Re: Lamepocalypse by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Or you could have installed an actual operating system, rather than a glorified **** of *****. Like some flavour of Linux, they hardly ever run out of support, are easily portable to even the most outdated hardware, all while taking MUCH less space, memory and being superfast on top of that.

    47. Re:Lamepocalypse by Penguinisto · · Score: 1

      In my recent experience most "home" users who can make the switch to linux can probably switch to a tablet, and forego a computer entirely.

      She has an iPad, but wanted to write docs and track cases for her local hobby group (ghost-hunting).

      So your solution to the windows 7 vs windows 8 price dilemma was to buy a Mac with OSX, then bought VMWare Fusion, and then bought Windows 7 anyway?

      I already had a Windows 7 install disk (well, .iso - I ripped it years ago), so no cost there really. As for the rest, my use case is highly atypical (hence the "but it works well for me." bit.)

      --
      Quo usque tandem abutere, Nimbus, patientia nostra?
    48. Re:Lamepocalypse by Darinbob · · Score: 2

      It's sort of a trial run apocalypse, to gauge the level of public interest in a larger scale apocalypse.

    49. Re:Lamepocalypse by vux984 · · Score: 1

      She has an iPad, but wanted to write docs and track cases for her local hobby group (ghost-hunting).

      Depending on how much writing she's doing - an ipad with a wireless keyboard would be sufficient.

      Not that I'm disparaging your use of Linux -- I'm just making the point that most home users that can switch to linux can switch to a tablet instead (and for most of them its probably the smarter move -- nartually as your wife has linux expertise living in the house it works fine for you.

      Basically though tablets are killing any chance for a home linux-desktop-in-the-home revolution... because a few years ago the idea was ... "If all you do is facebook, and gmail, and twitter, and youtube... hey you don't need windows you can get linux. And that's true... but if that's all you do you don't need a computer anymore either.

      I already had a Windows 7 install disk (well, .iso - I ripped it years ago), so no cost there really. As for the rest, my use case is highly atypical (hence the "but it works well for me." bit.)

      Windows 7 isos aren't the tricky part. Windows 7 licenses are. And unless you happened to own an otherwise unused FULL RETAIL license of Windows 7 your usage, strictly speaking, is in violation of the license agreement.

      The OEM sticker on your (I'm taking a guess here) previous windows 7 laptop technically isn't transferable to a vm on your new Mac.

      So your solution, to do it legit, requires a retail license purchase of windows 7, which is usually upwards of $250 for the pro version.

    50. Re:Lamepocalypse by roc97007 · · Score: 1

      As a system builder, I haven't had any problems moving XP and 7 licenses to other systems in the (rare) event of complete system failure. (As opposed to incremental upgrades, which sometimes require re-authenticating but do not require re-licensing.) You have to, you know, call and talk to a real person, but in my direct experience it can be done. This assumes you have media and a real, valid license key for each system, which is true for all the systems I build.

      You might be referring to systems that are purchased with the software installed, no media and no license key. I can't answer for those.

      But more to the point, it has also been my experience that systems last longer than versions of Windows. Having to regularly move a Windows license between multiple machines is not something regular users would need to do.

      --
      Oliver's law of assumed responsibility: If you're seen fixing it, you will be blamed for breaking it.
    51. Re: Lamepocalypse by roc97007 · · Score: 1

      I don't play games. I have a real life.

      --
      Oliver's law of assumed responsibility: If you're seen fixing it, you will be blamed for breaking it.
    52. Re: Lamepocalypse by roc97007 · · Score: 2

      ...and the moment the Adobe suite is ported to Linux, I will do that. I do run Linux (CentOS for server and Ubuntu for desktop) for any application that doesn't need Photoshop, Lightroom, or Premiere. When those become available (and I know of Gimp, I use it, it's great, but it's still not quite Photoshop) I'll dump Windows without a second thought. (I mean ARE YOU KIDDING? In Windows 8 I have seen the future of Microsoft, and I want to stay as far away from that as possible.)

      Because (and this is important), what OS you run doesn't matter, what work you get done with the computer is what matters. We sometimes lose sight of that.

      So why am I not on a Mac? Because Macs are expensive, have their own eccentricities, and I prefer to build my own systems.

      --
      Oliver's law of assumed responsibility: If you're seen fixing it, you will be blamed for breaking it.
    53. Re:Lamepocalypse by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Well I did have a choice, true. I could have bought an OEM version of Windows 7 that was more than twice the cost of Windows 8, and cannot ever be moved to new hardware when this computer dies or requires a major upgrade. Or I could buy Windows 8.1 direct from Microsoft for about $100. ... cut ...
        But surely you would do the same, no? Or would you really drop nearly $250 on an operating system?

      Yes, I did dropped around $250 for operating system. But it was Win 7 Ultimate box edition just before Win 8 release date (maybe 2 days before).
      Now it is running on 3rd machine just as new servers go on "refurb/used" market. 2 * Xeon E5520 is nice in 2U rack.
      OK, there is no touch screen but with 4 monitor ( 21"+24"+24"+21") setup I cannot reach corners without standing up. ;-)

    54. Re:Lamepocalypse by Mondor · · Score: 3, Informative

      That's the point.

    55. Re:Lamepocalypse by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      All the Windows OEM licences I've seen expressly forbid you moving them to other systems - even in the event of a complete system failure. Sure, it works, but the wording says it isn't valid. Retail copies have no such restrictions.

    56. Re:Lamepocalypse by roc97007 · · Score: 1

      The way I've explained it is thus -- it's not "another system". The motherboard blew out in this computer and I had to replace it. Since that particular model is not made anymore, I put in as close as I could find. The rest of the system remains the same.

      I mean really, regardless of what the wording says, Microsoft is not going to make you buy another license after fixing your computer. Were that so, we wouldn't fix them, we'd just replace them with Macs.

      --
      Oliver's law of assumed responsibility: If you're seen fixing it, you will be blamed for breaking it.
    57. Re:Lamepocalypse by DQKennard · · Score: 1

      There's sometimes highlighting, though on investigation it usually appears to be entirely random.

    58. Re:Lamepocalypse by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      generally speaking, the OEM VL and other MS OS licenses do have a clause to allow you to do a "one time" move from a failed hardware platform to another.

    59. Re: Lamepocalypse by Shirley+Marquez · · Score: 1

      Vista itself was fine, at least by the time service pack 1 came out. There were four problems that put people off it:

      1. The new Aero UI needed a lot of GPU power. At the time, most computers didn't have it so the UI ran poorly. You could revert to the old look without window transparency, which solved the performance problem, but it wasn't obvious how to do that and the OS didn't do it automatically if you had unsuitable hardware.

      1a. Under pressure from computer manufacturers, Microsoft dumbed down the requirements for the Windows Vista sticker. The result was that you could buy computers with a Vista sticker that didn't run Vista well with Aero enabled, and they SHIPPED with Aero enabled. You had to change settings before your shiny new computer would run acceptably.

      2. Vista was more memory hungry than XP. Older computers usually needed a RAM upgrade to run it well, which meant an added expense. Systems with a 512MB RAM ceiling were not uncommon at the time (they had two sockets, each of which would accept a module with 256MB or less) and those systems could not be upgraded to run Vista well. Vista also needed more hard disk space, which might require a hard disk upgrade.

      3. Vista brought in a major change in the way that device drivers are coded. (With good reason; the 2000/XP driver model had security problems you could drive a truck through. The new way isn't perfect but it was a substantial improvement.) Vista drivers for existing hardware were slow to appear if they were released at all, and some of the early drivers (especially graphics drivers) were buggy. That made it impossible to upgrade a lot of existing systems to Vista, and also meant that things like printers and sound cards became useless. There were quite a few examples of peripherals that were still on the market well after the release of Vista but had no drivers for it.

      4. UAC. Vista was the first version of Windows to ask for permission to perform various administrative things like installing new programs. In the initial release of Vista, UAC was far too paranoid, the result being that you got so many permission prompts that everybody just clicked through them without paying attention. So you got all the pain of the permission system without any real gain in security. The paranoia level of UAC was dialed down in the service packs but the damage in public perception of Vista had already happened.

      What this all added up to: people starting from a clean slate were usually happy with Vista, but people who wanted to upgrade or wanted to reuse components from an older computer often were very unhappy. Tech nerds and tech journalists tend to be in the latter category, so the people whose opinions mattered most did not care for Vista, even though typical customers buying new computers would have been happy.

    60. Re:Lamepocalypse by evultrole · · Score: 1

      Were that so, we wouldn't fix them, we'd just replace them with Macs.

      No you wouldn't. Have you priced any parts for macs recently? Talk about running into trouble with a particular motherboard model not made anymore, what do you do with the imacs with the GPU solder problems? Replace the board with an identical model, with the same flaw? Yeah, great.

      Need a new LCD on your macbook? Oh, look, Apple decided to take a standard LG lcd and reverse 8 of the wires so that you have to buy an Apple LCD from Apple for $400 instead of the generic $60 LG model.

      $250 for a new license when replacing an $80 motherboard would still be better than paying $500 for an Apple motherboard. Shit, those things frequently cost more than $330 used on ebay.

    61. Re:Lamepocalypse by roc97007 · · Score: 1

      I understand -- you don't fix Macs. But if it's not practical to fix PCs either, why bother with them?

      --
      Oliver's law of assumed responsibility: If you're seen fixing it, you will be blamed for breaking it.
    62. Re:Lamepocalypse by Meski · · Score: 1

      With Revelation 8:1 Update we've restored functionality of noise, so you don't have to suffer in silence for half an hour anymore. Angels have been upgraded with hovering capability to prevent exhaustion from too much standing. The first seven angels to accept the Update will also receive trombones instead of trumpets.

      It's a ceremonial wimblehorn, if you look closely.

    63. Re:Lamepocalypse by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I tried to do this on a VM. Run Linux as the host, play games in a windows VM. But VMware doesn't give the direct access to video, so games basically don't work. I've read you can do it with Xen hypervisor, but the details look to be more trouble than it's worth (for me, anyway),

  2. Apocalypse? by OverlordQ · · Score: 5, Funny

    Doesn't this happen every time they come out with a major update?

    --
    Your hair look like poop, Bob! - Wanker.
    1. Re:Apocalypse? by Opportunist · · Score: 5, Insightful

      Well, for me it's not an apocalypse, it's more a phoenix rising from the ashes!

      But then again, I'm in IT consulting...

      --
      We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
    2. Re:Apocalypse? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      The "we're not supporting the pre-update version of the OS" yes. That's normal.

      The "you can't update to the new version and we don't care, we're ending support for the only version you can run" part, not so much.

      In all seriousness, this problem can't affect THAT many people though. I know only one tech-savvy guy who runs win 8 by choice (as in, he had the option to run 7 and chose 8), and that's not even his main machine (which is osx). most people would never even know they wern't getting updates. I'm guessing that's what microsoft is banking on. by the time average joe user figures out in a year or two that their computer hasn't had any updates, MS figures they'll have solved the upgrade problems by then.

    3. Re:Apocalypse? by roc97007 · · Score: 1

      I see where you're going. I have a side business supporting regular non-corporate users, and when Win8 was introduced, business really picked up. There's a lot of user frustration out there.

      --
      Oliver's law of assumed responsibility: If you're seen fixing it, you will be blamed for breaking it.
    4. Re:Apocalypse? by Grizzley9 · · Score: 1

      Doesn't this happen every time they come out with a major update?

      My thoughts as well. I have a Eee Netbook that could never update to Win7 Service Pack 1 due to some mysterious issue that always failed no matter what I tried. Numerous hours and forums later, I just gave up since it's just a netbook and works fine for what it does and just install numerous small updates.

    5. Re:Apocalypse? by slashmydots · · Score: 2

      That's the strange part! Update 1 was what, 3 weeks ago or something? They supported Vista SP1 past SP2's release for like months and months and months. I've never seen them kill something so fast ever. Even XP SP2 was supported extremely long. And this is their latest product! I have a feeling this is going to be a Vista rerun where they cut their losses and kill everything once 9 is released. For example, Vista can run IE9 but not IE10 or 11 because MS didn't want to stick any money into making it work (that's not the excuse they gave but it's the realistic one). I'm selling 100% Windows 7 at my shop because it outnumbers 8.1 and that's that. They'll be forced to support it past the current end date of 2020 so no problem there. As for 8.1, they're going to bury it so fast it'll make your head spin. So I just simply cannot sell it on new PCs.

    6. Re:Apocalypse? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I have a feeling this is going to be a Vista rerun where they cut their losses and kill everything once 9 is released.

      I think that was clear to everybody except microsoft from virtually day one of Windows 8's release... and now they know it too.

    7. Re:Apocalypse? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Job 8:1
      Then Bildad the Shuhite replied:
      “How long will you say such things?
              Your words are a blustering wind."

    8. Re:Apocalypse? by PRMan · · Score: 2

      Really? That's strange. My Eee Netbook upgraded just fine. Of course, I didn't use the Home version it came with and put Professional on there instead.

      --
      Peter predicted that you would "deliberately forget" creation 2000 years ago...
  3. Microsoft make up your mind! by bejiitas_wrath · · Score: 5, Insightful

    First you end support for XP, which is a good thing, then you end support for Windows 7 in 2020, now you are ending support for Windows 8 on May 8. Why? the bog standard Windows 8 still has newer software than Windows 7, the only thing holding it back is the retarded Modern UI interface. But this is a pretty lame apocalypse. I am perfectly happy with Windows 7 in a qemu KVM hypervisor running on a Linux laptop. This way I can run Windows in a window and use MS Office for those tasks that require it and still have access to the superior Linux command line tools. I just wish I still had my XP Pro VM. Now that was fun. Why is everything an apocalypse these days?

    --
    liberare massarum ex ignorantia, clausa descendit molestie.
    1. Re:Microsoft make up your mind! by Bill,+Shooter+of+Bul · · Score: 3, Insightful

      Its headline 2.0 compliant.

      The older headline 1.0 headline of "Windows 8.1 Pre Update 1 Reduction of Update Availibility arives mid 2nd quarter" has been obsoleted and will not recieve any more updates, which required an update to a headline 2.0 compliant headline.

      --
      Well.. maybe. Or Maybe not. But Definitely not sort of.
    2. Re:Microsoft make up your mind! by rossdee · · Score: 1

      "First you end support for XP, which is a good thing, then you end support for Windows 7 in 2020, now you are ending support for Windows 8 on May 8"

      I guess MS realises that businesses are upgrading to Win 7, not 8

      So when is Win 9 due out?

    3. Re:Microsoft make up your mind! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      MS customer?
      You demanded to be screwed. They did. Why are you complaining?

    4. Re:Microsoft make up your mind! by TheGratefulNet · · Score: 0

      I actually have a pre-release copy of windows 9. don't ask where I got it from.

      when I played it backwards, it kept flashing some message on my screen about paul being dead. no idea what the fuck that was all about.

      --

      --
      "It is now safe to switch off your computer."
    5. Re:Microsoft make up your mind! by LordLimecat · · Score: 1

      Theyre not ending support for 8.1, and you know it. Why anyone is finding it necessary to feign outrage over a headline that they know is false, is beyond me.
      Oh wait its for the karma-- carry on.

    6. Re:Microsoft make up your mind! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      How good are the speeds with regards to running Win7 Qemu ? And a rough summary of your specs?

      I've been looking in to considering this myself, more so because Valve are helping move things to Linux in the games department.
      I'd have loved XP to be my last main install, but it might be one more yet.

    7. Re:Microsoft make up your mind! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Windows 8 is still supported.

      Just as Windows 7 is still supported.

      What is not supported (at a guess in either case) is the version that comes on a DVD. You have to download all the updates and be on the latest version of Windows 7 or Windows 8 to be using a supported version of Windows.

      However the reason this is in the news and everyone is all upset is that Windows 8 fails to update to the latest version in some cases and Microsoft has called this failing update "Windows 8.1".

    8. Re:Microsoft make up your mind! by Spamalope · · Score: 1

      Because it's the only way to get the message across to corporate fucktards that we are in the internet era and updating your software is FUCKING MANDATORY.

      Not enough of you are signing up for MS Live and MS Store. That's like stealing. Some corps have even blocked MS Store. That's why we've blocked offline updates to 8.1, made it mandatory and available via MS Store only. YOU WILL AGREE TO THE MS STORE Ts & Cs! In short, you will comply with whatever poison pill we care to server or we'll throw you to the malware thieves. Oh, and have a nice day!

    9. Re:Microsoft make up your mind! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I heard he kind of looked like a walrus after the crash.

    10. Re:Microsoft make up your mind! by Cthefuture · · Score: 1

      How is your video performance in KVM? I typically use VirtualBox or VMware because they have Windows video drivers that speed everything up. Last time I tried KVM the video in Windows was so slow that it was painful to use.

      --
      The ratio of people to cake is too big
    11. Re:Microsoft make up your mind! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Because, in Slashdot's new corporate landscape, every headline must be transmogrified into bombastic clickbait, in order to produce revenue. That's why. Toss the M$ haters some fresh meat and they will come running in droves.

    12. Re:Microsoft make up your mind! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Theyre not ending support for 8.1, and you know it.

      Actually, no, I don't know it. Because everything I've seen suggests that people who are unable to update from 8.1 to 8.1 Update 1 will no longer receive updates.

      Perhaps you could provide a citation for your claim that, even though I am unable to install 8.1 Update 1, I will still receive updates?

    13. Re:Microsoft make up your mind! by mrbluejello · · Score: 2

      ...and still have access to the superior Linux command line tools.

      I see you haven't learned PowerShell yet.

    14. Re:Microsoft make up your mind! by Burz · · Score: 2

      A word of caution: Most hypervisors were made primarily for the convenience of managing multiple systems on a single piece of hardware. If you want strong security around that Windows install you should think about running it in Qubes; version 2 just came out of beta.

    15. Re:Microsoft make up your mind! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Thank you. The number of times I have just shaken my head when linux folks talk about the power they have over the command line is beyond count. I guess the average linux user still thinks windows users are living with DOS or cmd.exe. Anyone who has ever learned and used Powershell can tell you that bash + every other tool you love is no comparison. I work in both environments all day long and am perfectly comfortable writing commands that fill multiple lines and have more pipes and symbols than recognizable words, but I still wish my linux box had powershell

    16. Re:Microsoft make up your mind! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I recently upgraded my mobo and proc (A Haswell overclockable 'K' i7)
      I was going to stick with good 'ol windows 7. I /really/ like windows 7. I'd used it since it's beta, but a few things made me reconsider.

      7 installed just fine, as always.. But even after service pack 1 there were nearly 200 updates to run. Ugh. Yes, there are automated tools that do it way faster than windows update, but still. Even on a bleeding edge system with 16 gigs of ram and an SSD it still took over an hour to get up to date.

      I decided to switch to a bigger SSD for the primary drive because, fuck, you can get a 256gig SSD for around 110 on sale. While I was at it I decided to give 8.1 a spin. I have an 8.1 tablet and I was frankly impressed with how well it worked on piddly tablet hardware.

      8.1 installed without a fuss. Grabbed the latest updates, including this nearly 1GB we're-not-calling-it-a-service-pack-but-it's-a-service-pack update.. And.. It's fast. Really fast. Noticeably faster than 7 and not in a trivial way. Boots in a flash. Windows and UI are damn responsive. On my main 120hz display everything is butter smooth to the point of being unsettling.

      Fortunately with this latest update you can easily de-fuck windows in to something resembling a proper desktop OS. You can uninstall the useless metro apps that only belong on touch screen interfaces. (Really, a fucking full screen only calculator?) When you're done its just a really fast and improved windows 7 with a start menu that fills up the whole screen. And you can fix that if you want with some 3rd party tools.

      What's going on with this update deadline, though, is that it's paving a way for the next windows 8 fix that finally lets users ditch the failed metro interface completely on desktop machines. It's going to be a big chance, and I'm pretty sure Microsoft does not want to maintain 2 codebases so they're making some stuff mandatory. Yeah, it's bad planning but it's better than having another windows Vista on their hands. Hopefully it's not too late for that. They really are trying to fix windows 8.

    17. Re:Microsoft make up your mind! by thunderclap · · Score: 1

      Because getting screwed too much makes you sore.

    18. Re:Microsoft make up your mind! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      In a corporate environment you are using volume license editions of windows which can't be updated through the store *at all*. You have to reimage....

    19. Re:Microsoft make up your mind! by Darktan · · Score: 1

      ...and still have access to the superior Linux command line tools.

      I see you haven't learned PowerShell yet.

      Powershell is a scripting environment, not a command line. The fact that you can enter your script interactively doesn't change the many inadequacies it still sports.

    20. Re:Microsoft make up your mind! by unixisc · · Score: 1

      Not just that, the Windows 8.0 is fine for things like tablets, where people wouldn't need the classic shell. In an embedded form, it would be fine in ATMs, where XP needs the most replacing. There is no need to end support - just make the upgrade mandatory, or if needed, automatic for desktop/laptop users, and optional for everyone else. Metro is fine on tablets, great on Lumia phones

    21. Re:Microsoft make up your mind! by ZorglubZ · · Score: 1

      Ummm... The speed increase might (just might) have something to do with the SSD upgrade. Just a thought...

    22. Re:Microsoft make up your mind! by bn557 · · Score: 1

      Win 7 works great on Qemu (and also in Xen, and Virtualbox) on an i7 820qm with 1 core dedicated to it as well as 2gb of ram set aside for it.

      --
      Humans are slow, innaccurate, and brilliant; computers are fast, acurrate, and dumb; together they are unbeatable
    23. Re:Microsoft make up your mind! by LordLimecat · · Score: 1

      Updates with prerequisites have been around for years and it is not unusual for Microsoft to instruct you to perform certain updates before they continue troubleshooting a case-- and if you do not / cannot they will often note that it is now "best effort".

      I can guarantee that how it will work is that you cannot install additional updates until you install this one-- just like always. Heck-- Windows XP SP3 will require no fewer than 2 updates to its update / installer components before it even lets you access the rest of Windows Update-- I know because I just performed an installation today for a test environment. This isnt new.

    24. Re:Microsoft make up your mind! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I'm confused. Why is ending support for an OS that people use a "good thing"? Why not end support for OSes that people DON'T use?

    25. Re:Microsoft make up your mind! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Windows 8/8.1 is much faster than 7. They stripped a lot of shit out of it to make it run on piddly arm tablets, and PCs benefit from that too.

      I hate metro, I have Apps, I hate the MS store with it's "look, every free app we have is actually just a bundle of garbage toolbars!" crap.

      But windows 8 proper? Very fast, much more so than Vista or 7.

  4. There are people running 8.1? by Eevee · · Score: 0, Troll

    If they want Windows, why haven't they spent $20 to have Windows 7 installed by the kid down the street so they can actually use the box?

    1. Re:There are people running 8.1? by Pieroxy · · Score: 5, Informative

      Are there still people running windows ?

      Many more than all other platform combined, at least on the desktop.

    2. Re:There are people running 8.1? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Because sometimes drivers are really fucking hard to find.

      There's a reason my ancient laptop from college had Vista on it instead of XP. I simply couldn't find the fucking drivers to make it work. Goddamn you Toshiba, for that.

    3. Re: There are people running 8.1? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      Run Ubuntu

    4. Re:There are people running 8.1? by cyberchondriac · · Score: 1

      - or games. Valve is getting there but it ain't ready for prime time yet.

      --

      Look back up at my post, now look back down, you're on the Internet. Now look back up. I'm a signature.
  5. Apocalypse, Really? by dingl_ · · Score: 0, Troll

    Most Windows users have automatic updates enabled, they will get Update 1 automagically, without even thinking. I mean, Surprise Surprise, if you don't keep your OS current with updates, no newer updates can be applied... This is not breaking news, it just makes sense Also Windows 8x support isn't ENDING, you must apply OS updates to continue receiving support

    1. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by XanC · · Score: 5, Insightful

      Would you care to read the summary and try again?

    2. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by peragrin · · Score: 0

      Read the summary. The windows 8.1 update has to be one of the most botched requires updates ever. The only good thing is that when it fails it fails early enough that no one notices. It doesn't yeah the machine it jut fails to update and gen locks out other updates.

      --
      i thought once I was found, but it was only a dream.
    3. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      And if the OS update won't install???

    4. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by Grishnakh · · Score: 1

      Did you even read TFS? Apparently, for a lot of people, Update 1 simply won't install for some reason. How are these people supposed to apply OS updates when the OS won't allow it?

    5. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by peragrin · · Score: 1

      Damn I need to use preview when posting from my phone.

      How does trash autocorrect to yeah anyways?

      --
      i thought once I was found, but it was only a dream.
    6. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by Threni · · Score: 5, Informative

      No, it's microsoft having a different minimum spec for 8.0 and 8.1. It's a cpu issue. Version n.x software should alway run on the same hardware n.x-1 ran on.

      What does Microsoft suggest people do about this? Buy new hardware? Live without the security fixes after just a year or so? Downgrade to 7?

      In some countries this would possibly enter consumer protection territory. In the UK possibly the 1979 Sale Of Goods Act.

    7. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by sqlrob · · Score: 1

      Really?

      Better explain all the 0x80070002, 0x80073712, and 0x80070005 errors in my update log then.

      And no, I don't think it's an OEM problem since the logs indicate a missing file in the update itself, at least for some of the errors.

    8. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by dingl_ · · Score: 0, Informative

      I've updated an older Lenovo L420.. Windows 7 to 8.0 to 8.1 to now 8.1 Update 1, I've had ZERO issues. as well I've updated my Dell Venue 8 Pro from 8.1 to Update 1, ZERO issues, updated my mums system as well so that leads me to believe its more an issue with conflicting OEM software/settings

    9. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by bmo · · Score: 4, Informative

      >Freshly minted account
      >Only posts on this thread - no other posts on anything ever
      >Friends: dingl_ (3643599) is all alone in the world.
      >Blaming the user
      >Blaming the OEM
      >Blaming anyone but Microsoft

      Oh look, a new Microsoft shill account.

      --
      BMO

    10. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by TWX · · Score: 1

      In some countries this would possibly enter consumer protection territory. In the UK possibly the 1979 Sale Of Goods Act.

      Buh-buh-buh-but the EULA!

      --
      Do not look into laser with remaining eye.
    11. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by bleh-of-the-huns · · Score: 5, Interesting

      Shill or not, he does has a valid point (I have not looked at the other comments).
      As much as I personally hate automatic updates, as I decide when I want to update shit, for the vast unwashed masses, it is not a bad idea. Too many of my friends and family (I no longer play tech support except for direct family.. aka my wife) have had machines with years of missing patches, and they wonder why their machines are up shits creek.

      I on the other hand, have a windows 8.1 slate I used for my car (runs vehicle diagnostic software, not the std odb reader crap), I cannot get update 1, I get the failure many others are getting. I cannot go back to Windows 7 because too many missing drivers, and very unreliable touchscreen experience. I have tried the windows 8 drivers on 7 with no luck. So for me, I will no longer have support (I do not need technical support, I would like security updates at least).

      Good thing I do not use that for anything other than car diagnostics... At least my car won't give my computer herpes :P

      --
      I came, I conquered, I coredumped
    12. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I also had no issue... that means people are making these issues up.

      I mean... if we can upgrade at LEAST four machines without issues, they must be lying. That's what... 1/3 of all the Windows machines? After all Windows 8 is such a flop...

    13. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by GlennC · · Score: 1

      So OF COURSE that means that NOBODY ELSE is having problems ANYWHERE!

      RTFA, N00b!

      --
      Go on, citizen, stamp the vote card. R or D, your choice.
    14. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by dreamchaser · · Score: 2

      If some users can't update it sounds like an OEM issue to me, or other conflicting software/ driver or firmware problem.. Not much Microsoft can do, its an OEM problem

      If you even bothered to look into it at all you'd see that your statement is false. It *is* a Microsoft issue, but then again looking at your details I wouldn't be surprised if you're just using a sockpuppet account to astroturf for MS>

    15. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by just_another_sean · · Score: 1

      Oh sweet! dingl_ has a couple of anecdotes that unequivocally prove the summary and all the other posters wrong so problem solved, apocalypse averted. Thanks dingl_!

      --
      Creationist Textbook Stickers Declared Unconstitutional by CowboyNeal
    16. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Stop spouting off before you understand the situation... you've already made a few glaring errors in the couple of sentences you've vomited out.

      First off, the update comes from the Windows Store, not Windows Update. I'll leave the rest up to you.

    17. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by bill_mcgonigle · · Score: 4, Interesting

      Did you even read TFS? Apparently, for a lot of people, Update 1 simply won't install for some reason. How are these people supposed to apply OS updates when the OS won't allow it?

      I got a brand new Windows 7 Lenovo machine for my folks' small business (to avert the imminent XPocalypse that I told them about two years ago, and eighteen months ago, and twelve months ago ... .) and I was shocked how a new-out-of-box Windows 7 machine not only needed about eight reboots to update itself, but that out of 147 updates there were like 24 that failed to apply. Reboot-re-run was needed about five times to just get through all those failed applies.

      I'm more used to lazily installing a CentOS 6.0 DVD and running yum update and getting 959 updates which all apply in one smooth transaction. And that stuff was just written by a few part-time guys at Duke (of course credit to RHAT hackers for making it faster).

      I wasn't surprised by XP's crummy updater, but by time Windows 7 came out they should have had this nailed with a team of pros working on it, and that this stuff is still broken in 8.1 is ridiculous. And to add insult to injury, they charge money for this junk!

      --
      My God, it's Full of Source!
      OUTSIDE_IP=$(dig +short my.ip @outsideip.net)
    18. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      It took 4 attempts to install on my machine. Keep trying.

    19. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by PriceChild · · Score: 1

      I installed Windows 8 from the oem disk (In MS' packaging) I received when I bought the hardware. It failed the 8.1 update with only a hex code. It took a month of googling to find the solution (and it was so obscure I've forgotten it now... either a registry change and/or modifying disk/partition flags) If a fresh install from ms's own packaging could go so badly I'm not surprised so many people are having issues. Thankfully Update 1 installed without issue.

    20. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      The installer part in Windows seems to be one of the worst ones. I completely understand, that a normal person does not benefit much from a detailed error report. But the current way of handling errors by showing a "unexpected error 0x123123, try again" -dialog is really annoying from a techie point. How on earth should a typical IT support solve these cases? Usually a Google of "error 0x123123" will just get 100k pages of similar reports, but no resolution for the problem. What if the Windows' installer had a way to force it to output a trace file of all the system modification attempts and their results? Then one could actually solve the problems. Usually the problems I have seen were caused by missing/existing files or unexpected access rights on the registry keys.

    21. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by SternisheFan · · Score: 1

      I have auto-update enabled, Win8.1 and the other updates installed flawlessly last week. Also have ClassicShell, no hint of any issues. Should I consider myself "lucky"?

    22. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by nine-times · · Score: 1

      Not only is the update failing for some people, but Microsoft has also made re-installations a pain for some of the rest of us. I bought a Windows 7 machine a few years ago, and decided to go ahead and upgrade to Windows 8. So I bought Windows 8, but they only sold Windows 8 as an "upgrade" which means I can only install it from an executable from Windows 7. I can't install a clean copy directly, and at the time I bought it, Microsoft was literally not offering a "retail" version of Windows 8, instead offering only "upgrade" and an OEM version.

      Since then they've introduced "8.1" and "8.1 Update 1", and the last I checked, I can't get an updated installer for those, let along an ISO for a fresh install. If I want to reinstall, I need to install Windows 7 from DVD, upgrade to Windows 8 from a downloaded installer, Upgrade to 8.1 through their app store, and then upgrade to Windows "8.1 Update 1" through Windows Update.

      Must it really be so difficult? Does this BS successfully stop piracy?

    23. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by NIK282000 · · Score: 1

      Bingo, if it fails on >25% of hardware I would be happy to scream "M$" with the rest of the herd but I've seen it update fine on Lenogo, Dell, my custom build (and Surface Pro) with no problems. The hardware driver hell that comes along with some brands of laptops lately is brutally frustrating.

      --
      Dear aunt, let's set so double the killer delete select all
    24. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by jtdennis · · Score: 1

      you obviously don't remember XP SP2 and SP3, both of which were very painful updates for many.

      --
      -- "Freedom is the right of all sentient beings" -Optimus Prime
    25. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by Threni · · Score: 2

      I don't get confronted with an EULA when I order a laptop from Amazon. And once I've bought it I don't care what appears on the screen because I didn't have the opportunity to read that when I was making the purchase (the SALE part of Sale Of Goods Act).

    26. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by towermac · · Score: 1

      "At least my car won't give my computer herpes :P"

      That's only because the car doesn't have it yet. Give it time.

      And I'd slip that tongue back in if I were you...

    27. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by frank_adrian314159 · · Score: 1

      Because 't' and 'y' are often interchanged in typos, as is 'r' and 'e'. If you're on an Android phone and using Swype, the a->s->h gesture looks a lot like an a->h gesture. So, if you're light on the 't', and sloppy about hitting the 'r', trash looks a lot like yeah.

      --
      That is all.
    28. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by marcosdumay · · Score: 1

      Does this BS successfully stop piracy?

      I'm pretty sure you'll find updated installation media for Win 8.1 if you search for torrents.

    29. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      > It's a cpu issue

      Link please.

    30. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by nine-times · · Score: 1

      Then my product key won't work, which means I have to come up with a product key generator or a crack. And at that point, why even bother buying a legit copy of Windows?

      So yeah, great job stopping piracy, Microsoft!

    31. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by PRMan · · Score: 1

      Anybody I help with their computer I always ask them if I can turn on Automatic Updates. I figure they'll be WAY better off than if I don't.

      --
      Peter predicted that you would "deliberately forget" creation 2000 years ago...
    32. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by I_Wrote_This · · Score: 1

      I have Windows Update set to download updates, but I need to install them.

      The Win8.1 Update was optional - I had to select it to get it installed (which went OK). Odd for something so essential to future updates.

      Anyone updating from 8.0 to 8.1 (now) has it pre-installed as part of the update download for the Windows Store (did that on another system 3 weeks ago).

    33. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by tfranzese · · Score: 1

      Tell that to Apple.

    34. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Statutory rights trump EULAs.

    35. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Oh look, an ancient user who, unlike every other person on this site, cannot for the life of him figure out how to post without manually copying a sig into the body.

      --
      BMO

    36. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Must it really be so difficult? Does this BS successfully stop piracy?

      No, it actively encourages it because it means it's easier to install a pirated version that comes as a plain ISO file that will install on bare hardware.

    37. Re:Apocalypse, Really? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Your post history leads slashdot to believe that you're just astroturfing for Microsoft. Give it a rest.

  6. Linking to page 100? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Insightful

    Page 101 has the notice that the update was re-issued with a fix and the rest of the posts are all "worked for me" posts. Problem Solved.

    1. Re:Linking to page 100? by sqlrob · · Score: 2

      So you missed the ones after that saying it just changed the error they were getting?

    2. Re:Linking to page 100? by Overzeetop · · Score: 1, Flamebait

      Maybe MS should take Apple's stance and simply require, as the first troubleshooting option, that the user re-install the machine from scratch. I've stopped bothering with Apple tech support because I don't have a day to re-install all my shit everytime a device pukes with an error.

      --
      Is it just my observation, or are there way too many stupid people in the world?
    3. Re:Linking to page 100? by megalomaniacs4u · · Score: 1

      I don't what planet you've been on, but reinstalling windows from scratch has been standard practice since win95 for anytime windows shits its panties

    4. Re:Linking to page 100? by vux984 · · Score: 1

      Yes, from win95 thru winxp it was standard practice anytime windows shat itself. In fact, it was standard practice for many to reinstall windows from scratch once are year just to head off it completely shitting itself.

      But things have gotten better since then.

    5. Re:Linking to page 100? by Rufty · · Score: 2

      But things have gotten better since then.

      ROTFLMAO

      --
      Red to red, black to black. Switch it on, but stand well back.
    6. Re:Linking to page 100? by lister+king+of+smeg · · Score: 2

      I don't what planet you've been on, but reinstalling windows from scratch has been standard practice since win95 for anytime windows shits its panties

      funny my but I find the standard practice to be nuke windows form orbit when it blows up install $linux and make a windows vm thats backed up.

      --
      ---Saying gnome 3 is better than windows 8 not so much a compliment as it is damning with light praise.
    7. Re:Linking to page 100? by Taed · · Score: 1

      I find the standard practice to be nuke windows form orbit

      It's the only way to be sure.

  7. Apocalypse is Old News by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    It happened when they 'upgraded' to 8. Losing Microsoft support is a minor follow up disaster.

  8. Orphaned??? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Does that mean Microsoft won't be able to spy on my Windows 8 computer?

  9. FUD? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0, Insightful

    considering most of that thread appears to be completely non technical users discussing some really dumb questions I am guessing this article is just a really lame attempt at trolling or generating FUD?

  10. Abandonware? by martiniturbide · · Score: 1

    Does it means we can call Windows 8.0 and Windows 8.1 (without patch) abandonware? :)

    1. Re:Abandonware? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      Yes.

    2. Re:Abandonware? by TrancePhreak · · Score: 1

      Windows 8.0 will still receive updates. Only Windows 8.1 pre-update will not.

      --

      -]Phreak Out[-
  11. They surely are shuffling things around by jones_supa · · Score: 5, Interesting

    It's very interesting what kind of circus the Windows 8 major updates have become. Instead of Service Packs, you now have Windows 8, Windows 8.1, and Windows 8.1 Update 1. Now, the support carpet is suddenly pulled for anything before W8.1U1. Along the way, various platform changes in the UI front have been introduced: start button goes away, start button comes back, ability to snap Modern apps, Modern apps get a title bar, Modern apps can appear in the taskbar, start menu is coming back. Also the settings are still wonkily spread across the classic Control Panel and the Modern UI "PC settings" application, not to speak about the "charms bar" which integrates really badly with the paradigms of the normal desktop, which the user is using at the same time.

    It's interesting because in the past Microsoft planned these things very carefully beforehand, and after the release of OS was very careful to not change core functionality. Maybe this is the future, then.

    1. Re:They surely are shuffling things around by jbolden · · Score: 1

      It's interesting because in the past Microsoft planned these things very carefully beforehand, and after the release of OS was very careful to not change core functionality. Maybe this is the future, then.

      Microsoft has been quite explicit this is the future. They want an update process more like Apple's. Which means getting their customer base and their developer base used to much faster turnaround on features and issues. They are unlikely to ever get as fast as Apple, and probably don't want to but they don't want to be where DEC or IBM were when Windows Server replaced their "bug for bug compatible" systems.

    2. Re:They surely are shuffling things around by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      It's what everyone else is doing -- why bother to complain.

    3. Re:They surely are shuffling things around by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      The whole thing works really well on a small laptop with a touch screen. Can't say the same for a larger non-touch laptop or a pure tablet though. The charms bar is crap without touch, and the new metro start screen is crap without a keyboard.

    4. Re:They surely are shuffling things around by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      On a 27-inch touch screen monitor on a desktop it's pretty.....much a waste. I don't get any functionality with touch that my mouse doesn't provide, even with the full-screen apps and start screen, and the touch screen gets streaks all over when I touch it so I haven't touched my screen in almost a year.

    5. Re:They surely are shuffling things around by RobertLTux · · Score: 5, Informative

      as far as settings go there is a trick that has been around for a while now

      "To activate God Mode in Windows 8, follow the steps below:

      1. Go to the Desktop
      2. Right-click and select New Folder.

      3. Right-click on the New Folder and select Rename.
      4. Change the name of the folder [just copy & paste the following string]: GodMode.{ED7BA470-8E54-465E-825C-99712043E01C}

      5. Open the folder and you will find every utility Windows 8 has under the sun.

      Note: With God Mode, you can easily access all the Administrative options and make any desired adjustments.

      Enjoy!"

      or just for "fun" https://dl.dropboxusercontent.... is pre rigged for your amusement

      --
      Any person using FTFY or editing my postings agrees to a US$50.00 charge
    6. Re:They surely are shuffling things around by Somebody+Is+Using+My · · Score: 2

      Microsoft has been quite explicit this is the future. They want an update process more like Apple's.

      Apple can afford to put it's customers on such a tight upgrade schedule because Apple has such a tight grip on what hardware is being used. Microsoft does not have this luxury; this is both Window's blessing and its curse. On the one hand, it allows Microsoft to dominate the desktop because users are not tied down to one hardware vendor. On the other hand, support becomes infinitely more difficult because Microsoft has to deal with all the potential conflicts caused by that huge variety of hardware. This type of support means that Microsoft has to do far more testing to make sure its OS upgrades don't inadvertently break something. This means upgrades need to come out slower, both so MS has time to do all that testing, and so its end-users can do likewise.

      Microsoft is trying to have it both ways: it wants all the advantages of its immense installation base without providing the necessary support for the full range of hardware. The the end-users are rightfully crying foul at this practice. Perhaps if MS had mandated that certain controlled hardware platforms (e.g., the Surface2) would not receive support unless upgraded to W81.u1 it would be one thing, but unilaterally declaring that any version of its mainstream OS that is older than a month not receive support? It sacrifices one of Windows greatest advantages: compatibility with older software and hardware. Without that, there is increasingly little reason to use Windows. It's almost as if Microsoft is intentionally trying to push its customers towards the alternatives.

    7. Re:They surely are shuffling things around by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      If this sentence was true :"On the other hand, support becomes infinitely more difficult because Microsoft has to deal with all the potential conflicts caused by that huge variety of hardware. " then Linux should have the same problem, and they don't!

    8. Re:They surely are shuffling things around by MrNiceguy_KS · · Score: 1

      No mod points, but thank you for this. I've managed to tweak my work PC enough that the parts of Win8 that piss me off mostly stay out of my way, but hunting through the mess of settings makes me curse the day Balmer emerged from the primordial soup of whatever parallel evolutionary track coughed him up.

      --
      Redundancy is good And also good.
    9. Re:They surely are shuffling things around by jbolden · · Score: 1

      Microsoft prior to XP supported a wide range of hardware and end users were on tight OS upgrade schedules. It is only with XP that their userbase got used to not being on top of things. The Windows 8.1 preview came out in June 2013. That's plenty of time for OEMs, Microsoft and companies to have noticed and resolved issues. But that sort of aggressive testing didn't happen, unlike in the OSX world. The problem isn't the range of hardware, the problem is a customer base whose desktop groups aren't constantly prepping for the next round of upgrades.

      It sacrifices one of Windows greatest advantages: compatibility with older software and hardware. Without that, there is increasingly little reason to use Windows.

      They have to move their customer base off both. On the hardware side they need to move them towards new interfaces. And thus on the software side they are going to need to move them towards applications that use the new interfaces. I for one thought that Windows 8 should have been touch mandatory with Windows 7 being the last OS for non touch devices. Instead, like Vista, they ended up with a 1/2 way solution where people can use the old hardware but are often dissatisfied.

    10. Re:They surely are shuffling things around by avandesande · · Score: 1

      You forgot about the similarly infuriating 'R2' for server software.

      --
      love is just extroverted narcissism
    11. Re:They surely are shuffling things around by captainClassLoader · · Score: 1

      I've seen disorganized large systems like this before - In the one case I'm thinking of, the root cause was that upper level management had no concerns about consistency or a unified architecture, and let each app team deliver what the team wanted without much in the way of group collaboration. This smells like a similar scenario.

      --
      "The plural of anecdote is not data" -- Bruce Schneier
    12. Re:They surely are shuffling things around by thejynxed · · Score: 1

      This braindead attempt at an OS was the fault of a VP who was determined to make her mark at Microsoft.

      She did alright, and is now firmly in the disaster zone category of "Carly Fiorina" when it comes to computing history. This is what happens when you promote people with zero technical know-how into these oversight positions where they are allowed to make decisions like this.

      --
      @Mindless Drivel: 100% of Twitter posts ever Tweeted.
    13. Re:They surely are shuffling things around by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      as far as settings go there is a trick that has been around for a while now

      "To activate God Mode in Windows 8, follow the steps below:

      1. Go to the Desktop
      2. Right-click and select New Folder.

      3. Right-click on the New Folder and select Rename.
      4. Change the name of the folder [just copy & paste the following string]: GodMode.{ED7BA470-8E54-465E-825C-99712043E01C}

      5. Open the folder and you will find every utility Windows 8 has under the sun.

      Note: With God Mode, you can easily access all the Administrative options and make any desired adjustments.

      Enjoy!"

      or just for "fun" https://dl.dropboxusercontent.... is pre rigged for your amusement

      You do know that this doesn't give you access to anything you can't already get to by using the start screen search box, right?

  12. Right... by DogDude · · Score: 1

    I'm supposed to believe that Microsoft, the company that is still pushing out updates for a 13 year old OS, is going to somehow abandon a large portion of their customers using their most current OS? I call bullshit.

    --
    I don't respond to AC's.
    1. Re:Right... by Tridus · · Score: 5, Informative

      As they say, truth is stranger than fiction because fiction has to make sense.

      It's true. If you are running 8.1, update 1 is mandatory to keep getting support: http://www.infoworld.com/t/mic...

      Microsoft said it themselves here: http://blogs.technet.com/b/gla...

      Originally they only gave 30 days to install it, but then they upped that to 120 because of all the compatibility and installation problems (and the few companies running Windows 8 screaming).

      Bizzarely, Windows 8.0 users aren't affected in the same way. This affects 8.1 users only. As usual, Windows 7 users can ignore this ongoing fiasco and keep doing productive work.

      --
      -- "So they told me that using the download page to download something was not something they anticipated." - Bill Gates
    2. Re:Right... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Since you can use Windows 8 just as you used Windows 7 99.9% of the time, many people are just as productive in Windows 8 as they were in Windows 7. It's the people that can't see past their initial blinding rage that are the problem.

    3. Re:Right... by MikeBabcock · · Score: 1

      They're supporting an OS people use, and not one that people don't even like.

      http://www.zdnet.com/just-how-...

      --
      - Michael T. Babcock (Yes, I blog)
    4. Re:Right... by MikeBabcock · · Score: 2

      You seem to have missed his point entirely; Windows 7 is unaffected by this current silliness, which cuts productivity by forcing people to comply with update requirements.

      --
      - Michael T. Babcock (Yes, I blog)
    5. Re:Right... by Hadlock · · Score: 1

      You have to draw a line in the sand for software update reform somewhere. Not supporting an OS that doesn't have a start button is a good place to draw a line in the sand. XP will end up as an odd duck of extended support, but this is a generally good direction they're taking.

      --
      moox. for a new generation.
    6. Re:Right... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      Yeah, and I've failed that damn update 15 times already with a File Not Found error. Nuking the Update log and all the files doesn't help. Every time, the damn thing downloads a fresh update fails the install.
      So, I suppose I could wipe everything, do a factory reinstall to 8.0, update all the drivers, reinstall 8.1 and try again. How much do you want to bet that will work?

  13. 1000 replies? by Enry · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Looking at page 100, it looks like this really affects about a dozen people and they just keep posting. Let me know when there's 1000 unique people saying there's a problem.

    (and it appears that there's a fix of sorts)

    1. Re:1000 replies? by sandytaru · · Score: 1

      I had no issues on either my main desktop or my laptop, nor did my husband have problems on his Surface. But they're all less than a year old. This seems to be affecting people who had slightly older hardware and either upgraded to Windows 8 or bought something that came with Win8 and was fine with it, but it was juuuuust underspecced for Windows 8.1.

      --
      Occasionally living proof of the Ballmer peak.
    2. Re:1000 replies? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I have a desktop computer at home that I bought in February 2009, a Core 2 Duo with 4 GB RAM with Windows Vista Service Pack 1. I upgraded it to Windows 8 in 2012, taking advantage of the early-adopter discount that MS offered in those days, and since then I have upgraded it to Win8.1 and to Win8.1 Update 1 as they came along. All of them worked perfectly. So no, just because you have older hardware it doesn't necessarily mean you're screwed.

    3. Re:1000 replies? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      I had the failed install. The only workaround that works is to reimage the machine from a clean Windows 8.1 install. All the DSIM crap doesn't work as the process for that errors out. Don't know if it was the version I installed (Enterprise, volume license) or what, but it would not install without a clean 8.1 and then the hours of updates. Pain in the ass!

    4. Re:1000 replies? by nashv · · Score: 1

      All Samsung Ativ books have problems due to a video driver upgrade that has not yet come through. You know how many of those Samsung has sold ?

      --
      Entia non sunt multiplicanda praeter necessitatem.
    5. Re:1000 replies? by Enry · · Score: 1

      I don't mean to say that it's not a serious issue, but to say that something is important because it has 1000 replies when there's only a few people posting, it's very misleading.

  14. great time to install linux by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    dual boot for us unchosen lamos rock on /. http://youtu.be/XN_e8RWDHlE a softwar meltdown like y2k only real?

  15. all hail by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    the new "update" that walks like a service pack, talks like a service pack, but isn't a service pack, thus no set rules or policy on life cycle with or without it, so microsoft can make up whatever the fuck rules it wants if you don't have it installed, even disregarding its own life cycle policies for windows.

  16. Codename "Apocalypse" by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

    Finally, Microsoft blessed one of their products with a codename worthy of what they actually do: Windows 8.1 "Apocalypse". Truth in advertising and all that.

    What do you mean I'm reading it wrong?

  17. Maybe you should read what the issue is by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Informative

    You may want to read up on the issue. The problem is people CAN'T update.

    There is a particular update that can fail and then it blocks all the other automatic updates from happening. So without even touching the machine and automatic updates turned on you get a computer that does not get any updates. The machine won't even notify you in the store that 8.1 is available until you get that one particular update cleaned up.

    This is through no fault of the end user, its completely a Microsoft issue.

    1. Re:Maybe you should read what the issue is by greendot · · Score: 1

      Yeah, my PC is stuck. I've tried every trick on every page I find and nothing works. I've probably spent 30 hours on it so far. I had no problems upgrading to 8.1. I'm now to the point where I'm uninstalling software to see if it works. If tonight's series of tests do not work, I have to flash the OS... and I'm not putting 8 on it again.

  18. You can't upgrade Windows 8.1 offline with OEM by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    You have to download 4GB from the Microsoft store for every single Windows workstation you have.

    They do allow you to upgrade the retail version offline.

    Fuck Microsoft.

    1. Re:You can't upgrade Windows 8.1 offline with OEM by Darkinspiration · · Score: 1

      Well there is a way to do this, http://www.extremetech.com/computing/178091-how-to-download-and-install-windows-8-1-update-1-for-free-right-now It's not really a offline installer like methode. If you apply the KB in the wrong order it could have interesting effect. But you do have a wsus server, microsoft free update solution (as in you gotta have an AD, and CAL, and a w2008 server, and SQL free...)

  19. Just following the trend by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Look no further than slashdot "beta". The new way is to change things randomly and according to what makes the developer happy, rather than change things only after careful planning and according to the needs of the user (not the developer).

    1. Re:Just following the trend by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Look no further than slashdot "beta". The new way is to change things randomly and according to what makes the developer happy, rather than change things only after careful planning and according to the needs of the user (not the developer).

      Yeah, but instead of calling it "just changing things randomly" we call it "agile" now. Move fast and break things, y'know? UX people ruined Firefox, GNOME, Slashdot, and Windows. What will they break next in their relentless pursuit of the fashionable over the usable?

    2. Re:Just following the trend by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      What's hilarious is that it's not actually "fashionable". That would imply a demand for the fashion, but wherever I look, I see angry users demanding less of it, not satisfied users demanding more of it. This "fashion" (the huge fonts, the scrolling, the oversized buttons, presentation over content, etc) was concocted entirely in the minds of the people making the software, not the people using it.

    3. Re:Just following the trend by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Honest to Pete. I thought it was just me!

  20. As if millions of voices cried out in terror... by RogueWarrior65 · · Score: 1

    And switched to OSX or Linux.

    1. Re:As if millions of voices cried out in terror... by jbolden · · Score: 1

      People who don't like rapid frequent updates are unlikely to be happy with OSX. People who have trouble installing service packs because they have to do a few configuration changes to make them work are unlikely to be happy with Linux. Classic jump out of the pot into the fire.

    2. Re:As if millions of voices cried out in terror... by RogueWarrior65 · · Score: 2

      Not so much with OSX. Might happen once a month or so if that. Linux, sure. Lots of components seems to get updated frequently. When I run Windows, it seems like every time I boot there is some sort of update. But not really my point. If Microsoft is going to brick the machine because an earlier update failed, that's bad.

    3. Re:As if millions of voices cried out in terror... by just_another_sean · · Score: 2

      I don't know, I installed Mint for my Mom to replace XP. Her and her husband actually seem more comfortable installing updates. They get notified on their desktop as regular users and I showed them how to switch user to an sudoer account and install the updates. When the updates are complete they just switch back to their regular account.

      It's only been a couple of months and these are by no means power users with complex app requirements or the need to play games but that said, for their simple needs, everything they expect to be there is there and to them the maintenance piece is easier for them to understand. Especially since more than the OS gets updated with aptitude - no more updating Windows, and flash, and Java, and AV and, well you get the idea...

      --
      Creationist Textbook Stickers Declared Unconstitutional by CowboyNeal
    4. Re:As if millions of voices cried out in terror... by jbolden · · Score: 1

      I agree the unified updates are wonderful with Linux, an area where Linux is clearly ahead of Windows and OSX. That being said, when something goes wrong with Linux updates the level of technical complexity assumed is quite high. Higher than making the few registry changes that is all that is needed to get 8.1 to update for these people.

    5. Re:As if millions of voices cried out in terror... by MikeBabcock · · Score: 1

      It is only on incredibly rare occasion that I've had to tweak a configuration file on Linux doing an update.

      I am a little perturbed however with the new Fedora default of "reboot to update" ... (you can install a separate updater that doesn't require reboots).

      --
      - Michael T. Babcock (Yes, I blog)
    6. Re:As if millions of voices cried out in terror... by jbolden · · Score: 1

      They aren't bricking the computers they will continue to run fine. And if they want updates they just make a registry change.

    7. Re:As if millions of voices cried out in terror... by just_another_sean · · Score: 1

      And that's where ssh comes to the rescue. :-)

      They have a blanket invitation to call me for help. I wrote a little two line script to punch a whole in iptables so I can get in remotely and have a look. So far I have not needed it (/knocks wood).

      --
      Creationist Textbook Stickers Declared Unconstitutional by CowboyNeal
  21. One of those unable to install the 8.1 update by LearningHard · · Score: 3, Interesting

    I'm not sure what the issue is. Both times I've tried to install it I end up with a black screen with no error message, no hard drive activity, nothing at all. Both times I've had to use my 8 disk to revert to regular Win8.

    1. Re:One of those unable to install the 8.1 update by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      you got a disk with your PC?
      if this laptop doesn't boot I am SOL
      damn them for not providing boot disks and no, a restore partition is not the same

    2. Re:One of those unable to install the 8.1 update by L4t3r4lu5 · · Score: 1

      If you have a Pro license, downgrade to Windows 7.

      If you don't have a Pro license, have you tried a Linux distro?

      I don't know if you can still slipstream updates, but maybe you could try that. Clean installation with all mandatory patches.

      --
      Finally had enough. Come see us over at https://soylentnews.org/
    3. Re:One of those unable to install the 8.1 update by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      That's a different issue to the install failure. When it's going to fail the install, Windows will restart the computer and get to the Windows splash screen, say it's installing the update, eventually tell you that it couldn't finish the install, then restore the original 8.0 setup you had before.

      A complete failure to restart might indicate some hardware incompatibility with 8.1, possibly a system update that hasn't been installed but is required for the installation/restore, or maybe something that's interfering with the installation before the restart like a virus scanner.

      I know I've tried installing 8.1 on my 8 machine without updating anything, after installing every update, and after trying a few of the less acrobatic system tweak suggestions, but while I still wasn't able to update at least it always did the restore properly. Now that the Update is out, I guess it's time to give it another shot.

    4. Re:One of those unable to install the 8.1 update by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      You can create a recovery disk with a USB. Just go into Control Panel and click on Recovery.

      You can also make an installation USB.

    5. Re:One of those unable to install the 8.1 update by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      This happened to my laptop, was beginning to really worry that I would have to revert back as well, but after a few reboots to black screen it eventually pulled through. It might just be something to do with them not giving a sign that the computer is doing something even though it might be while it tries to figure out what to install. I've also found that after several reboots, if something has gone really wrong, it will restore back to before the update and you can try again.

      The other thing that gets me is that updates occasionally invalidate my onedrive files and then it locks down my computer to a frozen state until I safe mode boot and disable onedrive temporarily. After a normal boot with onedrive turned off it will normally fix itself and I can turn it back on.

  22. whatever by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

    Why upgrade to Vista when you've got XP?

    Why upgrade to 8 when you've got 7?

  23. VM by grub · · Score: 5, Funny


    I run Windows 8 in a VM on Vista. It's like a layer cake of failure.

    --
    Trolling is a art,
    1. Re:VM by Sir_Eptishous · · Score: 1

      Your post made my day! Hilarious.

      --
      We play the game with the bravery of being out of range
    2. Re:VM by lister+king+of+smeg · · Score: 2

      I run Windows 8 in a VM on Vista. It's like a layer cake of failure.

      If only you duel booted your Vista install with Windows ME and installed BOB on it, then you would have the ultimate windows fiasco in a box.

      --
      ---Saying gnome 3 is better than windows 8 not so much a compliment as it is damning with light praise.
    3. Re:VM by unixisc · · Score: 1

      Using HyperV or VirtualPC?

    4. Re:VM by unixisc · · Score: 1

      How about Windows 8, w/ a Vista VM on HyperV, running VirtualPC in which you can have Windows ME running, and MS Bob on top?

    5. Re:VM by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I run Windows 8 in a VM on Vista. It's like a layer cake of failure.

      If only you duel booted your Vista install with Windows ME and installed BOB on it, then you would have the ultimate windows fiasco in a box.

      I smell a custom-rolled ISO installer coming soon, or perhaps an external hard drive loaded with this awesomeness of fail.

      "Dude, is that a Roku plugged into your computer?

      "Oh that. No, that's my Windows drive. They call it a FuckU."

  24. I run in windows 7. by Ralph+Spoilsport · · Score: 1

    It works. I'm eatin' popcorn. Can't wait for shit to start 'sploding.

    --
    Shoes for Industry. Shoes for the Dead.
    1. Re:I run in windows 7. by Bigbutt · · Score: 1

      Maybe you should change brands of popcorn o_O

      [John]

      --
      Shit better not happen!
  25. SteamOS by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Microsoft is giving everyone more and more reason to quit Windows altogether.

  26. Useful link? by sanosuke001 · · Score: 1

    [quote]
    As most people will have heard, Microsoft will end support for anyone who hasn't upgraded to Win8.1 Update 1 on May 8
    [/quote]

    So, how about a link to a press release from Microsoft for verification? It doesn't seem to be mentioned on their lifetime chart.(Windows Update Lifecycle)

    --
    -SaNo
    1. Re:Useful link? by sanosuke001 · · Score: 2

      As someone else posted in a sub-comment somewhere, http://blogs.technet.com/b/gla...

      --
      -SaNo
  27. It is a bit ironic ... by Rambo+Tribble · · Score: 0

    ... that you still see articles based on the question, "Why should I switch to Linux?" For all those still asking that question, the answer is, in a word, "Microsoft".

    1. Re:It is a bit ironic ... by Osgeld · · Score: 1

      linux is cute in two places, very serious work, and fucking around with your machine, tween those two extremes is where 99% of the rest of us live

    2. Re:It is a bit ironic ... by Rambo+Tribble · · Score: 2

      On the contrary, my clients and I have been using Linux for business and personal use in a variety of applications, for over ten years. Your impression is common, but ignorant. It is true that it takes some competence to set it up correctly, but that's actually true with Windows or OS X, as well. I've worked with each of them and Linux actually makes the most sense in how it's laid out and works. Linux, and the software which runs on it, will do the great majority of jobs as well or better than the other two, and, if it is properly configured for the use case, it is as easy to use as anything out there.

    3. Re:It is a bit ironic ... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      business and personal use, whoah there's some hard core software going on there, so hard core you dont even need a computer to function

      let us know when you do something more than write a letter and make a chart in a spreadsheet

    4. Re:It is a bit ironic ... by nashv · · Score: 1

      And then there are people like me who discover after going through 3-4 distros that their new laptops will only work properly with all features as advertised on a Windows install. To begin with Laptop power management and suspension states on Linux absolutely sucks. Period.

      --
      Entia non sunt multiplicanda praeter necessitatem.
    5. Re:It is a bit ironic ... by Rambo+Tribble · · Score: 1

      No, it's the manufacturers who make laptops incompatible with open standards that suck.

  28. regular users by roc97007 · · Score: 2

    Do regular users even know what and where the "update log" is?

    I don't blame Microsoft for orphaning 8.1 early -- it's a mess and a corporate embarrassment, and the sooner they get people off it the better. My copy of 8 went back on the shelf, and it'll stay there until I'm comfortable that Microsoft understands that most of their customers don't have touch screens and they have to provide for that.

    Geekly early adopters will figure out how to upgrade. Although they may be more vocal, they'll be less affected than the regular users, the people who buy computers to do stuff and not to manage operating systems, will be.

    From a marketing standpoint, Microsoft really needs to get the name "windows 8" out of the public mindshare. It tastes like failure.

    --
    Oliver's law of assumed responsibility: If you're seen fixing it, you will be blamed for breaking it.
    1. Re:regular users by Funk_dat69 · · Score: 2

      Haven't you seen the MS commercials lately?
      They all mention "The New Windows!", NOT "Windows 8!" Because they know that regular users have already latched on to the idea that Windows 8 is "bad". The same thing happened to Vista. Maybe both OS's deserve it, maybe not, but when you overhear Joe Schmoe computer buyer at Fry's saying "Oh, no I want the one with the good Windows", (I seriously heard this around the time Vista was cratering and again a few months back) you know you have a problem.

      --
      FUNK!
    2. Re:regular users by roc97007 · · Score: 1

      Exactly. The actual situation isn't as important as the users' perception, and currently that's pretty bad. I would submit that Windows 8 deserves every complaint, but then again, I'm a user. Someone who's.... I dunno, not a user? Works in Microsoft? Goes off bullet points instead of usage in the field? ...may have a different opinion.

      --
      Oliver's law of assumed responsibility: If you're seen fixing it, you will be blamed for breaking it.
  29. Apocalypse? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Sound like the Y2K bug to me.

  30. hurry up and update by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

    http://www.infoworld.com/t/microsoft-windows/microsoft-reissues-botched-windows-81-update-kb-2919355-241891

    And no, I do not believe the LIE that I must update immediatly

  31. Awful by blackiner · · Score: 5, Informative

    I ordered my parents a Windows 8 laptop to replace their old xp laptop, thinking, "Well, windows 8 can't be THAT bad." It was.

    The thing would not download updates. It would just say "Downloading updates..." and stall for hours at a time. I searched as much as I could online and only found barely any help. Most of it involved stopping the windows update agent service, and then deleting cached update files. But then it would just freeze again when I started it again. After a whole bunch of attempts, I noticed it was filling up the cache folder again after every time I restarted the update service, and that if I waited a bit, and then rebooted the computer, it would apply a few patches. So... that's ultimately how I ended up getting the thing all patched up. Stop update service, delete all cached patches, start update service, wait a few hours while they download in the background with no fucking mention of what is going on, reboot machine. I guess running the windows update must have been causing some sort of deadlock with the background updater or something... What a fucking mess. How in the world did they ship an OS with a non functioning update manager... And to top it all off, I couldn't just download win 8.1 separately, like how you could download the xp service packs separately. If I could have just done that... it would have been a hell of a lot simpler to get everything working. Instead they want you to download it through the microsoft store in metro... which won't show up unless, you guessed it, you already have fully updated through windows update.

    On the plus side, everything works fine now that it is fully updated.

    1. Re:Awful by Archangel+Michael · · Score: 1

      It actually does take hours. One thing I've learned is to be patient and just let the thing sit. I just did the exact same thing as you (Mom's XP, new Laptop, Windows 8 to 8.1 Update1).

      Surprisingly long time on a relatively speedy network. I can't explain it.

      --
      Agent K: A *person* is smart. People are dumb, stupid, panicky animals, and you know it.
    2. Re:Awful by dargndorp · · Score: 1

      You might want to try http://www.wsusoffline.net/ if something similar arises in the future.

    3. Re:Awful by phorm · · Score: 1

      Yeah, the old updater was slightly annoying with popups etc, but the "solution" (hide it behind a bunch of menus so you almost never see update info) is even worse!

    4. Re:Awful by Jaysyn · · Score: 1

      The thing would not download updates. It would just say "Downloading updates..." and stall for hours at a time. I searched as much as I could online and only found barely any help. Most of it involved stopping the windows update agent service, and then deleting cached update files. But then it would just freeze again when I started it again. After a whole bunch of attempts, I noticed it was filling up the cache folder again after every time I restarted the update service, and that if I waited a bit, and then rebooted the computer, it would apply a few patches.

      I've seen several XP sytems do something very similar, but it kept processor usage around 90%-100% the whole time it was downloading. The hotfix that was supposed to fix the issue was useless, all you could really do was not use the PC while it was updating. After a certain point / update this behavior would stop. Was never sure which update fixed it because I didn't have time do one update at a time.

      --
      There is a war going on for your mind.
    5. Re:Awful by PPalmgren · · Score: 1

      I just set up two laptops for family, both shipped with the original Windows 8 RTM. Fortunately this was my third go-around so I was prepared and knew what to expect.

      Windows 8, when originally shipped, had a bug in the windows updater. It would not display the status of your update downloads or update installs. They also designed the updater to be a background task and not something the user actively does anymore, with the stupid design decision to artificially limit bandwith for updates to a trickle regardless of internet connection or network activity.

      The result of this failure is that it takes around two hours to just download the updates for a fresh install, all without any visible indicator that the updates are going. The updater isn't frozen, its just the progress indicator is ass. It takes about ~3 hours to get a fresh machine updated and ready for windows 8.1, which takes another hour or two. I suggest using the desktop control panel (type 'contr' on the start screen to get to it) and disabling any kind of auto hibernate for this period.

    6. Re:Awful by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I may have this problem. Just says downloading and never does anything.

    7. Re:Awful by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Yeah, it's a pain for those of us who like to manually install patches, as soon as Windows 8 starts up it tries to download and install patches... I remember this same situation happening in 7 as well.

      However, for the average consumer, who doesn't know if their system is patched or not, or care to know, it just downloads all the updates, installs them in the background, and occasionally forces restarts...

      Now why the upgrade from Windows 8 to 8.1 required special store intervention instead of being treated like a normal patch is beyond me, as really most people probably wouldn't have noticed the difference.

  32. Disinformation by ormico · · Score: 3, Insightful

    Windows 8.0 will continue to be supported.
    Windows 8.1 will be supported if you have Update 1 installed.
    Its only Windows 8.1 that doesn't have Update 1 that is losing support.
    I'm not a fan of that, but don't make it out to be more than it is. Its certainly not the end of the world.

    1. Re:Disinformation by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Is there like a cut-off window where like if you don't upgrade from 8 to 8.1, or 8.1 to 8.1 Update (stupidest name ever..) you can't or something?

      As someone who doesn't use windows but still gets asked questions by various people, I find this whole thing very confusing.

    2. Re:Disinformation by ormico · · Score: 1

      no.

  33. Had problem with one machine by Lawrence_Bird · · Score: 1

    but not another. Problem machine was AMD based, I think that my have something to do with it. This seemed to finally fix it for me. I also used the standalone installer.

    The Inhell machine updted no problems.

  34. Vehicle dignostics software on Windows 8 by BcNexus · · Score: 2

    Hey, bleh... I assume you are happy with the software you are using. I'd be interested in something like that. What's it called?

  35. good thing... by smash · · Score: 2

    ... i'm still on windows 8. before you laugh... this box is purely for steam and 8 was easy to install. yes the UI is a pig. tried upgrading to 8.1, it just caused compatibility problems and random 100% io spikes (for 45+ minutes at a time, only fix = hard power cycle. no virus no hardware failure. have gone back to 8 and it has been fine since).

    --
    I run: Windows, OS X, Linux, FreeBSD. Just because you have a hammer, doesn't mean everything is a nail.
    1. Re:good thing... by rubycodez · · Score: 1

      my hardcore steamer family and friends say win 7 is the only way to go since some games have problems in 8

  36. again by tleaf100 · · Score: 0

    ms have a record of this kind of thing.anyone still got a phone with windows phone 7? at least 50% of devices that had wp 7 could not be upgraded to wp 75,they tried to blame everyone else that time as well,folk where not happy with their expensive new paper weights.

  37. Cool by steeleyeball · · Score: 1

    Won't affect me any... I guess people don't want to understand computers will have to get Macs.

  38. its a mad world by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    So do I make a joke about being much to lackluster of a topic to be called apocalpse or do i make one saying, "That's what you get for buying windows"?

  39. IWanaBHonoraballAssO by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    lol, my advice to Microsoft go ahead and upgrade windows 8.x to windows XP 64 or windows XP 32, Keep 7 for the moment, Fix the Classic look in 7, re grok the sec patching on XP and then offer updates at some cost. If they OFFERED updates in a non-threatening manner (e.g. TPP / Copywrong hell v 666) ppl would pay. But if you create an 4 pay only ECOSYSTEM, everyone will REVOLT.

  40. 8.0 by Bengie · · Score: 1

    According to some other sites, they said 8.0 users will still get updates, but if you have 8.1, you will be required to have 8.1 update 1 to continue getting updates.

  41. I shouldn't expect Slashdot to post correct info by Squeezer · · Score: 1

    Microsoft moved the drop dead installation date until August.

    http://www.infoworld.com/t/mic...

    Corporate Windows admins roared, and Microsoft backed off, pulling the patch from the WSUS update server regimen, fixing the WSUS-specific problems, and reinstating it eight days later all while simultaneously extending the drop-dead patching deadline for WSUS (and Intune and System Center Configuration Manager) corporate customers to August.

    --
    Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?
  42. Win8.1 hell by phorm · · Score: 1

    Never mind the "Update", I had major issues where a certain combination of software/drivers was making my system unbootable. After the reboot, win8.1 would get stuck on the splash screen forever.
    One of the things I try to do is keep my C: down to just the OS and core applications (a side benefit is that it allows it to fit on a 128GB SSD). Games, data, etc go on a different drive.

    After the third reinstall, I started going through a step of "install app", "reboot", "backup" and "restore if unbootable"

    ntfsclone is your friend. If you pipe it through BZIP2 it'll make a decently small backup file - relative to the OS drive size - that will save your bacon
              ntfsclone --save-image -o - /dev/sda1 | bzip2 -c backup.img.bz2

    1. Re:Win8.1 hell by nine-times · · Score: 1

      Is ntfsclone good enough for a real Windows imaging solution at this point?

    2. Re:Win8.1 hell by phorm · · Score: 1

      I've had pretty good luck with it thus far, mind you this is same-partition restore, not between devices etc. I have also used it to clone drives with decent success, though usually I have to run through scandisk once afterwards.

  43. steam OS by Lehk228 · · Score: 1

    windows 7 SP1 is supported until 2020,so I don't have to care about 8 for another six years, by then I will probably be on steam OS.

    --
    Snowden and Manning are heroes.
  44. give your broken computer to me. by anwyn · · Score: 1

    When your computer stops working on May 8, give it to me. I will install GNU/Linux on it and I won't have any problem at all.

  45. I bet Distrowatch makes them wet their beds by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    nt

  46. Well, that sucks. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Too bad that update just gives me an incoherent "0x800f0922" error with no hints at how to resolve it!

  47. that is a scene from goodfellas by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    or was in vegas for that buffet opening...

  48. I've been seal clubbing in SF by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Get on your dancing boots and start crushing skulls!

  49. This is Microsoft Speaking by BoRegardless · · Score: 1

    Well, Microsoft has a computer we will sell you, preloaded with everything you need; sign here.

  50. Bring 'Create Folder' back to file save dialog for by STratoHAKster · · Score: 1

    And while you are at it, remove the person(s) who made this user-screwing decision. I'm serious. They are not a PC user. Investigate and you'll find they own an iPad, even.

  51. Oh noes! by FuzzNugget · · Score: 2

    What will those 3 people do??

  52. Open Source by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    There's a solution. Stop BUYING into MicroShaft... Ubuntu, among a bazillion other Linux distributions, will run on a P4 with less than a gigabyte of memory... LibreOffice imports and saves to MS office formats, and exports directly to PDF format as well. The cost: $0.

    Yes, there's a bit of a learning curve, but the choice is yours - greater freedom, no costs, and better security with a bit of new learning OR let MicroShaft make you buy their software and/or new hardware and fill landfills with even more e-waste.

  53. Work and Home by gx5000 · · Score: 1

    Windows 7 and WinXP until M$ gets their act together...
    They may play on my Director's fears, so we have to apply everything M$ pushes out for our Networks, but at home and for most of my peers, we've been running XPSP2 for so long now that going to Win8 is like asking to be sat in a pool of sh*t.

    Then again, I'll be nearing three decades in the biz soon so it might be a good time to start putting my Linux boxes up ahead of Windows.

    --
    End of Line.
  54. And the choice is... by no-body · · Score: 1

    runnig
    W8 unpatched
    W8.1 dysfuctional

    I have them both, on 2 separate disks and like neither... Maybe going back to XP-64 would not make a difference then...

    1. Re:And the choice is... by thejynxed · · Score: 1

      XP-64? Egads! WHY?

      --
      @Mindless Drivel: 100% of Twitter posts ever Tweeted.
    2. Re:And the choice is... by no-body · · Score: 1

      XP-64? Egads! WHY?

      Just for the sarcastic fun of it.

      Today, I loaded the W8.1 disk again, just to try if it works any better.
      - did all the upgrades
      - tested (VPN to work through a VMware image) and failed hopelessly

      The same test and necessity works fine under with the identical VMware image under W8 and I just don't have the mutherfucking time to sort this out to get it going under W8.1.

      The W8.1 was a install/upgrade from a functional W8 and so it is after May 8:

      W8 unpatched
      W8.1 dysfuctional

        I really could kick somebodies butt for this!

  55. Misinformation by k0nane · · Score: 1

    This situation is only going to be made worse by the misinformation being spread among lower-knowledge users. An [Big Box Office Store] employee told me that a Microsoft rep told him that Windows 8.1 (thus Update 1 beyond it) is not a free update from Windows 8. Microsoft's in-your-face "time to upgrade!" dialog may make it clear that it's free, but some users will still refuse the update for fear they'll be charged. Add more to the zombie horde...

  56. You're Not Alone by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Even Bill Gates and Satya Nadella couldn't install Win8.

    http://www.newyorker.com/onlin...

  57. does 'orphaned' == inoperable? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    if I don't get updates how will this be an 'apocalypse'?

  58. Better Option by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    I just bought a laptop with Windows 8 and an additional SSD. The first thing that I did after verifying that the hardware worked was to remove the HDD, install the SSD, and load Linux Mint.

    The extra $70 is worth not having the headache of viruses and restricted boot.

  59. Unclear about the impact by kenh · · Score: 1

    As I understand it there are 2 kinds of Windows 8 installations possible - a "retail" install or an "enterprise" install. "Retail" installs would include OEM installs, retail upgrades, and retail new install media. "Enterprise" installs would be installs from volume license media (Software Assurance, etc.). so-called "retail" installs attempt to upgrade to Win8.1, "enterprise" installs do not.

    Currently an "enterprise" install must be manually upgraded to Win8.1, which involves an actual upgrade to the OS, not a simple patch/service pack install. "retail" installs will attempt to make the upgrade to Win8.1, but as noted above the success of a particular patch can prevent the install.

    Am I to believe MS is dropping support for "enterprise" installs of Win8 this week? That sounds wrong - either MS will let "enterprise" users upgrade to Win8.1 via patch/service pack OR they will continue to support Win8 in "enterprise" settings.

    --
    Ken
  60. Windows 8.x? does anyone even run that shit? by rubycodez · · Score: 1

    I use Win 7 in a vm at work and home for anything needing Windows. All the IT guys at work, the windows lovers and the certified microsoft engineers, agree 8 is total crap and despise it.

  61. Upgrade Path is easy by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    The Upgrade Path is easy. Just say yes, then click here, then install your new, stable, virus-free operating system. You don't have to pay for it, but you can donate money if you want. And never look back.

  62. That's funny by Workaphobia · · Score: 1

    Quite interesting that Windows Vista and 7 are going the way of XP so soon.

    --
    Evidently, the key to understanding recursion is to begin by understanding recursion. The rest is easy.
  63. Re:Lambpocalypse by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    What did the seals ever do to the lamb? Too cute?

  64. I can't get anything by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    I have 8.1. I never even got the chance to try 8.1 Update. For some reason it won't download anything from MS (VCRedist in Steam, definitions in Windows Defender, the MS store in (ugh!) Metro).

  65. Thankfully I have stayed with W7. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    With W7, I only have the usual problems, but have never had Windows fail to recognize me. I think that a lot of people are wary of Windows computers and this may be the straw in the camels back if they aren't able to get updated. What a disgusting state of affairs. W8 and 8.1 seem to be the electronic EDSEL!!

  66. Good by crhylove · · Score: 1

    More Gains for LINUX.

    --
    I hold very few opinions. I hold information based on observation and fact. If you wish to disagree, please use facts.
  67. I use Windows 7 by sproketboy · · Score: 1

    You insensitive clod!

  68. Go Linux, by divali · · Score: 1

    Well that's good news, now more and more people will see the rubbish mess that MS have got themselves into and migrate to Linux.

  69. Just give up on Windows 8 already, Microsoft by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Do your homework (new CEO buzz) and release Windows 9.

    Windows 8 is a flop, just like Surface tablets, just like Windows phones. Polishing a turd is desperate.

  70. Lawyers by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    I sense a need for lawyers. Lots of lawyers!