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User: uxbn_kuribo

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  1. decisions decisions on Lack of Sunlight Could Lead To Early Death · · Score: 3, Funny

    deathmatch and early death, or exercising and long life... the choice is clear *starts up HL2*

  2. you THINK it's safe on Why the LHC Won't Destroy the World · · Score: 1

    Yeah, it's perfectly safe until you cause a resonance cascade. Next think you know, we're blowing away headcrabs with a shotgun.

  3. disappointed on Water Ice On Mars · · Score: 1

    At first I thought it said "ITALIAN ICE ON MARS." :( I wanted to know what flavor. :(

  4. Re:What do you get with knighthood? on Stephen Hawking Turned Down Knighthood · · Score: 2, Funny

    You start out with a lance, a pony, and the ability to jump in an L-shape. Also, after you've been a knight for a while, you can dip your sword in a fountain to see if it'll turn into Excalibur.

  5. This is somewhat true. on Is Google Making Us Stupid? · · Score: 1

    Sometimes when I try to find a passage in a book, my brain tells me to Ctrl-F for just a split second.

  6. Bullying on Proposed Legislation Would Outlaw "Cyberbullying" in US · · Score: 1

    I don't see how such a law could be passed without violating free speech. I mean, if some kid on World of Warcraft calls my wife (yes, she plays) a bitch, I should be able to tell him to go jump into a fire and die a horrible death. As for bullying, my grandfather used to tell me this story about when he was growing up during the days of the Great Depression. This older kid used to take his money from him every day. Like, every day for a few weeks. Except one day, my grandfather took a brick to school with him instead. When the kid asked for the money, my gramps pulled the brick out and waylaid him upside the head with it. He hit him so hard, he thought he'd killed the kid. Kid never bothered him again. Of course, nowadays, my gramps would have been arrested for that.

  7. Not the way to fight piracy... on Time Warner Cable Tries Metering Internet Use · · Score: 1

    It may not be that they want to combat piracy, but I can certainly see it getting worse. How so? Think about it. At $1/GB, pretty much any retail game could be pirated for like $5. That's still better than the $50 that the software companies want for them. Movie piracy? That's, like, 2 for $1. People will figure they'll pirate MORE since they're paying extra for the bandwidth. And we all know you can't COMPLETELY stop piracy, no matter how much "BT throttling" you do.

  8. Good luck suing anyone on MediaDefender's BitTorrent-Based DOS Takes Down Revision3 · · Score: 1

    Unless you can find some leaked documents from the higherups authorizing it, or some people come forward and admit it.

  9. Re:The perils of generic trademarks on Johnson & Johnson Loses Major Trademark Lawsuit · · Score: 1

    I think Switzerland should just swoop in and sue all of them.

  10. Trademark lawsuits have become a joke. on Johnson & Johnson Loses Major Trademark Lawsuit · · Score: 2, Insightful

    I'm glad this one got thrown out. How these companies keep getting away with trying to trademark common words or symbols is beyond me. And this one wasn't even as bad as the crap that Monster Cables keeps trying to pull. I mean, seriously, who would ever think that Monster Cable had anything to do with Fenway Park's Green Monster, the 1985 Chicago Bears, or Monster Energy Drink? Did they invent the word Monster? Should they sue the tabloids for calling child molesters monsters? I mean, hell, even Triple H has brought litigation against rapper The Game. Companies get away with this crap because 90% of the people they sue would rather settle out of court. But enough is enough. Judges need to start throwing that crap out.

  11. Lunar Property Rights on The Case for Lunar Property Rights · · Score: 1

    I own the moon. Me and Danny Glover. Problem solved.

  12. Re:Summary for those who don't RTFA on DARPA Celebrates 50 Years of Pushing the Envelope · · Score: 1

    You left out one of their failures-- Metal Gear.

  13. The messed up thing... on RIAA Sues Homeless Man · · Score: 1

    Is that tax dollars will have to pay to help support this poor man because he won't be able to get back on his feet after paying assloads of cash out to billionaires.* * Not that they'll ever see a dime from him anyway. Hell, if OJ can avoid paying the Goldmans, this guy's set for life.

  14. He forgot to mention... on DARPA Chief Outlines Array of Future Projects · · Score: 2, Funny

    Where is the DARPA Chief's pet project, Code Name... Metal Gear?

  15. Re:P2P - P4P? on Enhancement To P2P Cuts Network Costs · · Score: 1

    As long as I don't catch my P69P, everything will be fine.

  16. Wait... on $5 Per Month Fee Proposed For Legal Music P2P · · Score: 1

    Isn't this like trying to tax drugs? Or fine people for walking past crackhouses? Just because you CAN do something, doesn't mean you WILL do something. I could shoplift with impunity, but I don't.

  17. Actually... on Hitchhiker's Guide Turns 30 · · Score: 3, Funny

    Call me when the series turns 42.

  18. Re:Big Mistake on The Universe Is 13.73 Billion Years Old · · Score: 4, Insightful

    Alternatively, you could just take it that the Bible Thumpers have taken a good book of mythology and Jewish legend and claimed it as fact. It's kinda like if people still believed that Zeus created the universe from Mt. Olympus. Except people take it seriously.

  19. Raise your hand if... on Little Demand Yet For Silverlight Developers · · Score: 1

    You had never heard of Silverlight until it came with a Windows Update. I bet that's how Microsoft is meeting its download quotas.

  20. Actually... on Government Mistakenly Declares Deaths of Citizens · · Score: 1

    This would be perfect for those hermit types that live "Off the Grid."

  21. It has to be said on Astronomers Say Dying Sun Will Engulf Earth · · Score: 1

    Sun to Earth: Haha, die in a fire. Earth: Come back in 7.6 billion years, n00b.

  22. Re:Just write a game he'll like... on Jack Thompson Served With Order to Show Cause · · Score: 1

    Oh please, Grand Theft Auto: Branson, Missouri would sell. Hell, you could strap the GTA name onto Grand Theft Auto: Extreme Lawnmowing and people would buy it. I mean, Bully had a lawnmowing minigame.

  23. What's sad... on Jack Thompson Served With Order to Show Cause · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Is that once he's disbarred, he'll blame the gaming community, and still go on Fox News being the world's biggest douche, and have plenty of ignorant people around to believe that the gaming community did this to him. Just because he won't be a lawyer anymore won't stop him from being a massacre chaser and ranting like a madman on TV.

  24. Re:Message for Jack Thompson on Jack Thompson Served With Order to Show Cause · · Score: 1

    If we're throwing around UT2k4 terms, I think an appropriate one would be: Humiliation!

  25. 1,3%? on Google's Research on Malware Distribution · · Score: 1

    I'd have thought it'd be way higher than that.* *if the anti-malware companies are to be believed** ** Some of them can't be believed because their anti-malware contains malware.