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User: The+Ultimate+Fartkno

The+Ultimate+Fartkno's activity in the archive.

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  1. Re:Do-gooder on Hillary, GTA, and High School Football · · Score: 1


    There's a joke to be made here about quantity discounts and not paying taxes, but I'm not gonna make it...

  2. Re:Whaddya mean... on Microsoft To Begin Checking For Piracy · · Score: 5, Funny


    Hey, lay off! For all intensive purposes he was right!

  3. Re:Mod parent insightful. on Shuttle Discovery Lifts Off · · Score: 1

    Good thing it wasn't a reporter who said it.

  4. Re:Why must we be animals? on Russia's Biggest Spammer Brutally Murdered · · Score: 2, Insightful

    Considering the tight connection between spammers, hackers, and the notoriously violent Russian crime gangs, I don't think this was a robbery. He wasn't killed for spamming, but his spamming is how he met whoever killed him.

  5. "Hello? Mr. Marketer?... on Full-Motion Ads Come to Videogames · · Score: 1

    ...we have good news and bad news."

    "Yeah? What's up?"

    "If you'll look at the screen here you'll see that your ad for the new season of 'The Simple Life' is the most viewed in the game."

    "Excellent! And the bad news?"

    "Mainly it's being viewed through sniper scopes, targeting reticles, and the inky blackness of portals to the Netherworld."

  6. Re:When you have a game like that on Hot Coffee Cooling Off · · Score: 1

    Lara Croft had some promise, but her knees were too pointy.

  7. Re:This is all getting quite confusing... on Firefox 1.1 Scrapped · · Score: 4, Funny


    > Internet Explorer is free about like it is free for me to have sex with my wife.

    If your only other option is one involving open sores, then I suggest you stop griping...

  8. Re:In other news... on ESRB Revokes San Andreas Rating · · Score: 2, Funny

    True (and sad) story. I was perusing a /. threadwar one day where guy #1 was saying that guy #2 had no right to speak as an authority on the subject because guy #2 had a dumb screenname. Guy #2 fires back with something along the lines of "so I could have three degrees in the subject but you wouldn't agree with me because my name was 'The Ultimate Fartknocker'?" In that moment, I knew that it was time to stop posting AC and sign up for a real account.

    So I'm signing up for an account, screw something up, and go back to correct it but don't realise that the information on the form has been truncated to just the characters that were visible in the box and not what was off-screen before. Lo and behold, I am now "The Ultimate Fartkno."

    The end result was so dumb that I *had* to keep it just for the story...

  9. Re:In other news... on ESRB Revokes San Andreas Rating · · Score: 3, Funny
    one of those pet peaves pounded in to me
    speaking of peeves...
  10. Re:Buy Ink By the Gallom on HP Invents A New Way To Print · · Score: 1

    From the referenced site:

    " As many of us watch on live TV, we saw the devastation of recent hurricanes and, once more, the loss of many American lives. It has brought those 9-11 feelings home to me, and I'm sure to many of you as well.

    These feelings of great loss have moved AccessInk.org leaders to provide an opportunity to support our fellow Americans facing disasters while purchasing regular ink cartridge needs."

    ------

    o.O

  11. Re:All soundtracks are copyrighted on Attack of the $1 DVDs · · Score: 2, Funny

    > It's trivial to make an uncopyrighted silent soundtrack for a DVD.

    You try telling the John Cage estate that...

  12. Re:Forget SE Asia for a moment... on Grizzly-sized Catfish Caught in Thailand · · Score: 1

    And we all know that He only made that rule up when nobody could stop giggling when he made proclamations like "And lo, I am the Lord God Clarence..."

  13. Re:$200m!! on The Lawsuit of the Rings · · Score: 1

    Considering how many times this exact same type of lawsuit has happened, you'd think that the studios would clearly state how the merch / syndication / cable / broadcast rights would be doled out. Duchovny sued Fox for the exact same reasons and (IIRC) Alan Alda sued over MASH.

  14. Re:FREEST PEEST on GPL Violations of Miranda IM · · Score: -1, Offtopic


    I agree. The GNAA Post Licence guidelines clearly state that the first post of any new article must a) be clearly marked in a way that is offensive to African-Americans and/or homosexuals, contain derogatory remarks about the Slashdot staff or a2) point out duplicate posts and/or misspellings, and c) contain at least one enormous ASCII representation of a well-known sphincter-centered shock site. This post fails on all counts. Expect to hear from our lawyers.

  15. Re:Another Crying Game on Total Conversion HL2 Mod · · Score: 2, Interesting

    No, no it didn't.

    Quake was open-sourced three years after it came out and a full two years after Quake II's engine made the Q1 engine financially obsolete for licensing purposes. Releasing the Q1 code did little "work" for id except earn them a tremendous amount of goodwill from the open-source community. Their only financial benefit came from the licensing fees that came in when the dozens of commercial games developed by the OS community and based on Q1's code were released.

    Don't confuse your rabid hatred of closed-source software with a sense of how to run a profitable business.

  16. Re:But... on PlayStation 3 HDD to Ship With Linux · · Score: 2, Funny

    Just the other day I was ship-watching at a really noisy location with my foul-mouthed friend in the Navy and I said "HEY, YOU *$&%, IS THAT A DESTROYER?" and he yelled back "NO, CARRIER! *#&$!"

    i'm so ashamed to have done that...

  17. Re:We always wanted the show to end... on Simpsons Film in Preproduction · · Score: 4, Funny

    > And characters are sooo flat.

    Well it *is* animation, after all...

  18. Re:What about drugs? on Judge Rules Offering != Distributing · · Score: 2, Funny

    > Usually they have some fake drugs (basil, powdered sugar, whatever).

    Basil?

    Either you've never been in a kitchen before or your dealer has been completely ripping you off.

  19. Re:Pharoah Ramses III agrees with this post. on Paul Graham: Hiring is Obsolete · · Score: 1


    Bitch, you almost made me laugh...

  20. Re:Pharoah Ramses III agrees with this post. on Paul Graham: Hiring is Obsolete · · Score: 1

    > And fetch me a fresh Nubian virgin

    What's a Nubian?

  21. Re:Haven't we looked at this before? on Maui X-Stream: GPL Violations, Lies, and Damn Lies · · Score: 1

    Do you have any idea how much damage that electromagnet would suffer if I let it roll straight over your hard drive?

  22. Re:And now: My two cents... on How to Leave a Job on Good Terms? · · Score: 1, Informative

    Dammit... my best reaction in two years and I posted anonymously. I should have had the courage to stand behind my poo humor. ;)

  23. Uh oh... on Spam Capital of the World · · Score: 1

    Methinks the Sun-Sentinel will soon regret having a reg-free "post your comments" board attached to an article that just got Slashdotted.

    "Marge? What in the world does '133t Hax0r' mean?"

  24. Re:Is it too late on Spam Capital of the World · · Score: 1

    List for me everything you bought from a company that sent you inconvenient, annoying advertising you didn't want, refused to stop sending it no matter how many times you asked, and made you pay for the privilege of receiving it.

  25. Re:There can be only 1 on Baltimore Kinetic Sculpture Race Photos · · Score: 1

    Old news.
    What's new, pussycat?