Slashdot Mirror

So then, it's safe to say you don't read bash.org?

  how much is long distance?
  evenpar123|Dean: Depends on your carrier.
  Satan
  666 cents a minute.

Yeah, and if you try to post your slashdot password, it will show up to everyone (but you) as a bunch of stars.

*********, see?

This doesn't seem as funny as it used to be.

<@insomnia> it only takes three commands to install Gentoo
<@insomnia> cfdisk /dev/hda && mkfs.xfs /dev/hda1 && mount /dev/hda1 /mnt/gentoo/ && chroot /mnt/gentoo/ && env-update && . /etc/profile && emerge sync && cd /usr/portage && scripts/bootsrap.sh && emerge system && emerge vim && vi /etc/fstab && emerge gentoo-dev-sources && cd /usr/src/linux && make menuconfig && make install modules_install && emerge gnome mozilla-firefox openoffice && emerge grub && cp /boot/grub/grub.conf.sample /boot/grub/grub.conf && vi /boot/grub/grub.conf && grub && init 6
<@insomnia> that's the first one

prettykittikat: Im going 2 the club 2night
Syric 2005: im going 2 lern 2 tipe 2nite 2
prettykittikat: what?
Syric 2005: Exactly

I can't wait for that[irc] to catch on. Then we can setup a website to bash people about the stupid comments they make. We could call it http://www.bash.org/

You can use to IRC to chat? I thought it was a random quote generator!

Oh, and I almost for the trusty spellchecker approach.

No idea. Bash.org had an interesting suggestion, but unfortunately it only works in meatspace.

What are you talking about? All you need is a robe and wizard hat! (google cache)

Bash.org

... this

I don't have hard drives. I just keep 30 chinese teenagers in my basement and force them to memorize numbers.

I recall this irc conversation where the feds snooped in (or at least it looked very realistic).

Thought you might like reading.

FBI agents always signs on as 'FBI'. :)

http://bash.org/?104383

I think that by deviant they mean this. The FBI agent with the nick BritneySpears14 must have been truly shocked.

If it were written by one of those, maybe it would go something like this:

"Harry took the wang. He felt a sudden warmth in his fingers. He raised the wang above his head, brought it swishing down through the dusty air and a stream of red and gold sparks shot from the end like a firework, throwing dancing spots of light on to the walls"

making an object a paint brush seems to be just an unimaginative copy of the tool for the physical world

It just seems kinda silly to me that we repeat this same silly duplication of old interfaces each time. When cars were first invented people tried to put reigns on them along with many other examples I can't remember. I'm just surprised we haven't learned yet that new technologies generally demand new interfaces...

Children are exceptionally good at learning new interfaces and ways of controlling things

(Note this isn't a real criticism just a general observation and nit picking)

Read this for inspiration, and then replace any words in the summary relating to hands or fingers with wang:

"The BBC is reporting that scientists have developed an ultra-light wang that they claim can mimic the movement in a real wang better than any currently available. Researcher Dr Paul Chappell, a medical physicist who worked on the device, said, 'With this wang you can clutch objects such as a ball, you can move the wang out to one side and grip objects with the wang in the way you do when opening a lock with a key, and you can wrap your wang around an object in what we call the power grip - like the one you use when you hold a hammer or a microphone.'"

It doesn't work as well as Harry Potter but it's still chuckle-worthy.

please, use the original source, bash.org

http://bash.org/?104383

bloodninja: Baby, I been havin a tough night so treat me nice aight?
BritneySpears14: Aight.
bloodninja: Slip out of those pants baby, yeah.
BritneySpears14: I slip out of my pants, just for you, bloodninja.
bloodninja: Oh yeah, aight. Aight, I put on my robe and wizard hat.
BritneySpears14: Oh, I like to play dress up.
bloodninja: Me too baby.
BritneySpears14: I kiss you softly on your chest.
bloodninja: I cast Lvl. 3 Eroticism. You turn into a real beautiful woman.
BritneySpears14: Hey...
bloodninja: I meditate to regain my mana, before casting Lvl. 8 chicken of the Infinite.
BritneySpears14: Funny I still don't see it.
bloodninja: I spend my mana reserves to cast Mighty F*ck of the Beyondness.
BritneySpears14: You are the worst cyber partner ever. This is ridiculous.
bloodninja: Don't f*ck with me bitch, I'm the mightiest sorcerer of the lands.
bloodninja: I steal yo soul and cast Lightning Lvl. 1,000,000 Your body explodes into a fine bloody mist, because you are only a Lvl. 2 Druid.
BritneySpears14: Don't ever message me again you piece of ****.
bloodninja: Robots are trying to drill my brain but my lightning shield inflicts DOA attack, leaving the robots as flaming piles of metal.
bloodninja: King Arthur congratulates me for destroying Dr. Robotnik's evil army of Robot Socialist Republics. The cold war ends. Reagan steals my accomplishments and makes like it was cause of him.
bloodninja: You still there baby? I think it's getting hard now.
bloodninja: Baby?
--------------
BritneySpears14: Ok, are you ready?
eminemBNJA: Aight, yeah I'm ready.
BritneySpears14: I like your music Em... Tee hee.
eminemBNJA: huh huh, yeah, I make it for the ladies.
BritneySpears14: Mmm, we like it a lot. Let me show you.
BritneySpears14: I take off your pants, slowly, and massage your muscular physique.
eminemBNJA: Oh I like that Baby. I put on my robe and wizard hat.
BritneySpears14: What the f*ck, I told you not to message me again.
eminemBNJA: Oh ****
BritneySpears14: I swear if you do it one more time I'm gonna report your ISP and say you were sending me kiddie porn you f*ck up.
eminemBNJA: Oh ****
eminemBNJA: damn I gotta write down your names or something

Give credit where credit is due.

Then put 33 cents in another envelope and complain that you want it back. And then post it to bash.org

http://bash.org/?240849

I can't believe this made slashdot.

The only redeeming feature was that it reminded me I hadn't visited bash.org for a while.

obligatory bash quote

i'm going to become rich and famous after i invent a device that allows you to stab people in the face over the internet

http://bash.org/?4281

Then perl newbies / passer-byers take a look at it, don't understand it, and freak out and say that perl is crap.
And in a way they are right: Perl is crap for RAD by now compared to other languages.
Then perhaps they're threatened because there's a huge community of smart perl programmers that manage to upstage them constantly.
Yeah, the zealots and their praises are probably one the main reason for the hate against perl. Its just not that good as the zealots claim. Thus people are disappointed.
To zoom out on the issue a bit, I'm really sick and tired of this current movement in computer science where so many think that programming should be made into some kind of simple task that anyone can do.
That sounds so elitist it hurts. But yes, programming should be as easy as possible, but not easier.
Hence you end up with languages like Java that hold your hand really really tight and refuse to let go. Is Grandma writing software really a good thing?
Grandma uses VisualBasic or PHP, but not Java. Oh, and its a lot better when Grandma writes software in Java than in PHP or Perl.
Or should we save it for the people who at least have a passing familiarity with computers & networks; hell, someone who might even know a little bit about the basic mechanisms in a typical UNIX kernel?
No. Your Perlcode might even run on a Non-UNIX System - this is one of the reasons to use Perl, Python, Ruby or Java.
... it's a high speed highway, damnit, and my life is on the line!
So you prefer to use a very powerful old car without any safety measures, because "you can handle it". Yeah, right.
Make no mistake - there's still an undergound of brilliant developers that understand their systems inside out and produce amazing, high performance code. Many of them are in the open source community. And we refuse to let go of our power tools. You may use whatever language you like, but expect a well-deserved ass kicking if you get in our face and try to tell us you know better.
Uhhh, Im scared. You really remind me of this guy: http://www.pbm.com/~lindahl/real.programmers.html

Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.

You must have read this story from bash.org,

<skycreatoR> hehe awesome
<skycreatoR> today at my job (i work in a cinema) we had the premiere on shrek 2
<skycreatoR> and because of the ocation, green popcorn
<skycreatoR> then some little girl came over to my booth and asked why the popcorns were green
<skycreatoR> i said it was because we put mashed shrek down in the popcorn machine
>skycreatoR< then she began crying and ran away

http://bash.org/?514353

cfdisk /dev/hda && mkfs.xfs /dev/hda1 && mount /dev/hda1 /mnt/gentoo/ && chroot /mnt/gentoo/ && env-update && . /etc/profile && emerge sync && cd /usr/portage && scripts/bootsrap.sh && emerge system && emerge vim && vi /etc/fstab && emerge gentoo-dev-sources && cd /usr/src/linux && make menuconfig && make install modules_install && emerge gnome mozilla-firefox openoffice && emerge grub && cp /boot/grub/grub.conf.sample /boot/grub/grub.conf && vi /boot/grub/grub.conf && grub && init 6

How can you assert that the government is established to DEFEND our rights when the rights themselves are, simply and exclusively, our DEFENSE against the government itself?

You are mistakenly thinking of "the government" as one entity, protecting the population from itself.

Rather, it's one government (the "good guys") trying to protect the population from a more oppressive government (the "bad guys") which may arise in the future. In other words, our Founding Fathers said, "Hey guys, if someone comes and tries to impose a monarchy on you, you have our permission to kick their ass."

To help you understand this concept, I direct you to this bash.org quote (potentially offensive language use).

Pretty much says it all...you really couldn't be more wrong. That's a relief...

Phew, close one. Good thing your point-of-view has been confirmed as the correct one by a couple short snippets from Wikipedia, or you might have had to start questioning your assumptions.

Logically falicies aside, wow! ...just...wow!

Yes, wow! Without logical fallacies, your own argument crumbles to pieces. An impressive act of auto-fallacio, i.e. the use of logical fallacies for self-gratification.

#262417 +(4570)-
<_kr4m3r> so many fucking criminals, its bullshit
<foniks`> heh, if we sent all the criminals to some empty continent and just left them there to die
<foniks`> and showed up like 50yrs later like, "sup?"
<foniks`> whatd u think they'd say?
<FoSZoR[bg]> something along the lines of, "G`Day mate"

#5273
<erno> hm. I've lost a machine.. literally _lost_. it responds to ping, it works completely, I just can't figure out where in my apartment it is.

[erno] hm. I've lost a machine.. literally _lost_. it responds to ping, it works completely, I just can't figure out where in my apartment it is.

http://bash.org/?487298

-!- Spudnewt [MacroKILLA@S01060004e2286ac3.wp.shawcable.net] has
joined #nanog
These goddamn trolls interrupting my flow. These niggas
don't respek us with a +o. They gotta color spam and fake
invite, bombing with asciis in yellow on white. Shit
yeah. it's bright, you 12 year old kiddie. You ain't got
pubes and you ain't seen titty. I'll jupe your chans and
ban your ass. Don't message me with plz unban, your chance
has passed! Other opers crappin up our relay net.
Why haven't you delinked your 386 yet? ircd needs xeons and
dual cpus. When it comes to irc hardware, you can't be a
jew. Shit, nobody knows the trouble I've seen. On invites
for websites with naked teens. Begs for ops and packet
attacks. Shit from users who use vi, not emacs. Another
long day of patrolling the IRC. Eating my doritos, and
having a jerk, I chat with TheWalrus and #nanog faggots.
All this niggas do is complain "the lag it's-- bad, chat
is slow, and we're getting harassed." Shit, trolls, this
k-line is your last. Once more and it's "G" and you're
gone for good. Banned from the internet chatting
neighbourhood. It's lonely at the top. Just me and
CHANFIX. Day in and day out. Banning trolls with my linux.
We give safe harbor to chatters world wide.
From pedophiles to hacker thieves. Yeah, I won't lie: IRC
is a cesspool of e-misfits. EazyCheezes and bagel-cutters
like that nigga BitS. But at least we're the best.
Disagree and you're gone. BRB, mom just told me gotta mow
the lawn.
-!- Spudnewt [MacroKILLA@S01060004e2286ac3.wp.shawcable.net] has left
#nanog []
-!- mode/#nanog [+b spudnewt!*@*] by nar
someone give that guy a record deal

Here ya go.

Yes, of course.

"Its almost someone giving you a formula for isolating the printed words in the latest Harry Potter book to form a short porn story."

Oh hell, it's WAY easier than that...
Just change every instance of the word "wand" to "wang". One little letter makes the whole series perverse.

There's post on bash.org about it, if i recall.... Yup.
http://bash.org/?111338

Ah, but the real question is ... were they being stabbed by HatfulOfHollow ?

The original: http://www.bash.org/?492775

Yea, a bash.org quote for every occasion.

The punchline, of course, was -
overlord_overkill2007: ewwwwwwww
rhys_rhaven: oh it gets worse. she has no file structure!!!!!
rhys_rhaven: what kind of sick woman doesnt organize her files?!!!
Daniel: EWWWWWWWW

Every now and then you find something that you just can't physically find.

From Bash.

hm. I've lost a machine.. literally _lost_. it responds to ping, it works completely, I just can't figure out where in my apartment it is.

Every now and then you find something that you just can't physically find. Lotsa fun.

Obligatory bash.org quote:

<erno> hm. I've lost a machine.. literally _lost_. it responds to ping, it works completely, I just can't figure out where in my apartment it is.

And instead of going to the hospital, you promptly go to Slashdot and post your story in an article about copyright law.

What's more important? Health, or fame? A man has got to have his priorities...

It's somewhat reminiscent of this:
<Opcode> i was gonna call 911...but i was downloading a file

The martian atmosphere is much thinner.. so it isnt gonna be as powerful as "terrestrial hurricanes" for sure..
http://bash.org/?1988
kritical matts: bikes go faster than cars...a bike at 60 mph is a lot faster than a car at 60 mph
matts kritical: um no...
kritical matts: um yes
kritical my sisters sport car at 60 mph goes faster than my dads explorer at 60 mph
kritical a bike at 60 mph will blow by a car at 60 mph

You might as well give up.

It will take you longer to type in the install commands than it will take the show to air in it's entirety. Twice. On back to back weekends.

--K

http://bash.org/?39553

SirChris: After using Yahoo, google, ask.com, etc.. to no avail, all I need to know is what currency uses £ as their symbol. I need to convert £189.00 into english dollars.

in here lies your answer....

http://www.bash.org/?258908/