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Of course I can't swim in a lot places I used to without some sort of foot protection as the little buggers are sharp and can cut the hell out of your feet. That and for the few species that have benefited, there's plenty that have not and a result of the cleaner water means the growth of weeds has exploded.

It would be cool if they could safely genetically engineer these things to be sterile & seed the waters with them from time to time to clean it up some without having to worry about them actually taking root. Of course I've seen the Simpsons episode, I know what happens when you mess with an ecosystem.

You don't walk away from that market, unless you have an (economic) suicide wish and want to be fired by your shareholders.

Oooh, the Germans are mad at me. I'm so scared! Oooh, the Germans! Uh oh, the Germans are going to get me!

link

Now maybe we can finally know if ants can be trained to sort tiny screws in space.

It's basically the Black Knight scene from Holy Grail in video game form.

Congress took it deadly serious, and humorlessly approached it. Which frankly you are doing in you post, as well.

Nobody who has played Mortal Kombat thinks it was about realism, it was about comedy. Because fighting games are basically intended to be two player, and the point of Mortal Kombat is that after you've beaten your mate at the game in the arcade, it's funny to rip out his on screen character's spine or crush his head, etc. It's not immersive in that you know that the guy standing next to you isn't really having his spine pulled out, just his onscreen puppet is. (Incidentally, The Simpsons TV show gets this. Mortal Kombat wasn't released until 1993, The Simpsons had fatalities in Super Slugfest in 1990.)

Now, if we could only figure out some way for the oil companies to reap massive profits from such a scheme...

Block the sun

Homer: "Now, honey, poachers are nature's way of keeping the balance. Whenever there are so many species that people get confused and angry, a poacher is born."

Special thanks to snpp.

Bart: Hey, G.I.Joe: your sign's broken. We're already in Australia.
Marine: Actually, Sir, the embassy is considered American soil, Sir!
Homer: Really? Look, boy, now I'm in Australia...[hops over the line] Now I'm in America...Australia! America!
Bart: I get it, Dad.
Homer: Australia! America!
Marge: Homer, that's enough!
Homer: Australia! America! [gets punched] Ow!
Marine: Here in America we don't tolerate that kind of crap, Sir!

(Source)

Ooh, an irony meter. Oh, that's a *real* useful invention. ;)

Maybe but between Kodos and Kang I think Kang actually care about us and will follow through with his promise to build a ray gun aimed at a planet that I've never heard of. a la simpsons.

I might start recomending it to friends and customers soon. I have yet to encounter the DRM boogyman. I am using it to type this post.

From The Simpsons:
Marge: Lisa, you got a letter.
Lisa: It's from my pen-pal Anya! [reads]
  Anya: [voice over] Dear Lisa, as I write this, I am very sad. Our president has been overthrown and
  [voice changes to that of a man]
  replaced by the benevolent general Krull. All hail Krull and his glorious new regime! Sincerely, Little Girl.

i will not celebrate pointless milestones

The noted thinker Pierre Boulle wrote this seminal work on the human qualities of primates way back in 1963.

The great philosophers Jack Barth and Mark Kirkland teamed up in 1996 on this collaborative effort.

http://www.snpp.com/episodes/3F06.html

I'd probably keep misspelling it as "freopen". Also, does it come with a free Frogurt?

Homer: America, take a good look at your beloved candidates. They're nothing but hideous space reptiles! [unmasks them] [audience gasps in terror]
Kodos: It's true, we are aliens. But what are you going to do about it? It's a two-party system; you have to vote for one of us!
Man1: He's right, this is a two-party system.
Man2: Well, I believe I'll vote for a third-party candidate.
Kang: Go ahead, throw your vote away.[Kang and Kodos laugh out loud] [Ross Perot smashes his "Perot 96" hat]

Thanks, Simpsons Archive!

Ahem. The Simpsons Archive.

SLOW DOWN COWBOY!

Perl - gruesome syntax and readability

Homer: America, take a good look at your beloved candidates. They're nothing but hideous space reptiles. [unmasks them]
[audience gasps in terror]

Kodos: It's true, we are aliens. But what are you going to do about it? It's a two-party system; you have to vote for one of us. [murmurs]

Man1: He's right, this is a two-party system.

Man2: Well, I believe I'll vote for a third-party candidate.

Kang: Go ahead, throw your vote away.
[Kang and Kodos laugh out loud]

[Ross Perot smashes his "Perot 96" hat]

(link)

"It's a bit of a mystery, yes, but if you look at the clues, you can figure it out."

http://www.snpp.com/guides/springfield.list.html

Must have been a pretty slow year!

http://www.snpp.com/episodes/3F07.html

The wars of the future will not be fought on the battlefield or at sea.
They will be fought in space, or possibly on top of a very tall
mountain. In either case, most of the actual fighting will be done by
small robots. And as you go forth today remember always your duty is
clear: To build and maintain those robots. Thank you.
-- Military school Commandant's graduation address, "The Secret War of Lisa Simpson"

Heh, your post reminds me of a great scene from a Treehouse of Horror Simpsons episode.

Shopkeep: Take this needle, but beware it carries HIV.
Homer Simpson: [worried] Ooooh, that's bad.
Shopkeep: But this HIV can cure AIDS.
Homer Simpson: [relieved] That's good.
Shopkeep: The cure isn't guaranteed to work.
Homer Simpson: [worried] That's bad.
Shopkeep: But if it works, you'll be completely protected from that terrible disease.
Homer Simpson: [relieved] That's good.
Shopkeep: The LD-50 is one tenth of what I can reliably administer to you.
Homer Simpson: [stares]
Shopkeep: That's bad.
Homer Simpson: Can I go now?

Or maybe it's a mutant dolphin that is developing extra new sets of fins...

so they can RETURN TO LAND...

There's also a documentary about these dolphins.

You don't win friends with salad.

And you won't make friends with Simpson's misquotes. ;-)

http://www.snpp.com/episodes/2F02.html

"Oh my God...the dead have risen and they're voting Republican!"

According to the script the exact line is: “Kwyjibo. Uh... a big, dumb, balding North American ape. With no chin.”

Our top story tonight: Those clowns in congress did it again. What a bunch of clowns.

What a great commentary on the O.J. trial! Absolutely fantastic.

I turned down their free motor boat offer because I didn't like the color.

And because the mast had termites.

And because... the thingy was... shut up!

Linky, because some mod will probably think this is offtopic.

Pharm. 2: ...This pill reduces class clownism 44%.
Pharm. 1: With 60% less sass-mouth.
Pharm. 2: The only thing more effective is regular exercise.

"I didn't even know what a nuclear panner plant was!"

- Homer

You're thinking of how things work in theory, not practice. In theory, congress passes a bill with a $30 Million rider to support the perverted arts. The president, not willing to pass a bill that would fund the perverted arts, vetoes it. If congress wants their bill passed, they have to go back and detach the rider and pass it again. Life is good.

In practice what happens (or used to happen) is congress would pass a think-of-the-children bill, with the $30 million rider to support the perverted arts. When the president vetoes it, his opponents score political points for saying the president (and his party) don't support children because they didn't pass the think-of-the-children bill. So, rather than veto it, the president passes it to avoid giving his opponents political ammunition. The line item veto changes the scenario, the president can now sign the think-of-the-children bill and avoid the $30 million perverted arts rider.

that they used in the Simpsons. Though you may lose all feeling in the left side of your body....

I think he knows that.

Jebediah: [on film] A noble spirit embiggens the smallest man.
Edna: Embiggens? I never heard that word before I moved to Springfield.

Before they did anything else they were writing programs. Simple ones that started the game. Next they were playing with loops:

10 PRINT "Big Tits"
20 GOTO 10

Something like this would've been more likely (and more useful):

10 PRINT CHR$(4);"PR#1"
20 FOR I=1 TO 200
30 PRINT "I will not hide behind the Fifth Amendment"
40 NEXI I
50 PRINT CHR$(4);"PR#0"

Someone missed the joke...

From http://www.snpp.com/episodes/4F02.html

From the sky comes a scream, as Homer is crashing right into the
Capitol. A few footsteps later, he comes running down the stairs.

Homer: America, take a good look at your beloved candidates. They're
              nothing but hideous space reptiles. [unmasks them]
                [audience gasps in terror]
Kodos: It's true, we are aliens. But what are you going to do about
              it? It's a two-party system; you have to vote for one of us.
                [murmurs]
  Man1: He's right, this is a two-party system.
  Man2: Well, I believe I'll vote for a third-party candidate.
  Kang: Go ahead, throw your vote away.
                [Kang and Kodos laugh out loud]
                [Ross Perot smashes his "Perot 96" hat]

Mmmm... Pie Pants.

No... wait. I meant Pie Pants.

Mmmm, Freedos

--
More free D'ohs

> I'm surprise the tobaco companies hasnt graft tobaco plnat and hemp together

Or... tobacco and tomatoes!!!

http://www.snpp.com/episodes/AABF19

Chief Wiggum: Go ahead, Ralphie. The stranger is offering you a treat.
Ralph Wiggum: [takes a bite of a tomacco, but spits it out] Oh, Daddy, this tastes like grandma!
Wiggum: [takes a bite, and likewise spits] Holy Moses, it *does* taste like grandma!
Ralph: I want more.
Wiggum: Yeah, me too. We'll take a bushel or a pack or just -- just give it to me. [takes a bushel basket of tomacco from Homer, and gives him a wad of cash]
[Homer giggles evilly]

Sounds a bit like that Simpsons episode, The Secret War of Lisa Simpson.
Bart: I know, I'll go to my room to think about what I did.
Homer: Oh, no, your room is full of toys. You're going to the, uh, garage.
Bart: You're the boss.
Marge: I tell you, Chief, I just don't know what we're going to do with him.
Wiggum: You know, you do have options.
[Bart rides by the living room window on a lawn mower]

I just looked down at my WWFD bracelet (What Would Frink Do?), and chortled aloud at the idea.
But to play devil's advocate, or Thomas Kuhn's advocate, science is much more a subjective, social construction that we like to admit. So maybe we, uh, could turn it into a mascot for misfits. We could call it the Planet with Mass Deficit Disorder. Or maybe, The Special Planet. Perhaps you'd prefer The Differently Orbiting Planet. Mm-hai!

Announcer: Astronomers from Tacoma to Vladivostok have just reported an ionic disturbance in the vicinity of the Van Allen Belt. Scientists are recommending that necessary precautions be taken.
Homer: [scoffs] Eggheads. What do they know?

snpp

The Simpsons have made me cry repeatedly. At the end of the Saturdays of Thunder episode, when Homer and Bart have that "father-son" moment to the tune of You are the wind beneath my wings, it gets me nearly every time.

It's a joke, buddy. And a pretty good reference, at that. *(:=

http://www.snpp.com/episodes/CABF01

-bw

It reminds of the Simpsons episode where Lisa finds an "angel" buried near a mall that was under construction.

But where's Lee Carvallo's Putting Challenge (now with free scoring pencil!)? My Dinner With Andre? SimReich? Angus Pogordny's Caber Toss? Razor Fight II: The Slashening? And so on...

Lisa states that "West Springfield" is three times the size of Texas. It appears to be roughly the same shape too. All this does is constrain Springfield's location towards the east of the USA - nobody said West Springfield was all in the same state.

(You have to know these things when you maintain the Where Is Springfield? file.)

1. They're training soldiers for the upcoming war on Iran.

2. "Get ... the ... boy!!!!"

Actually, that's all I had.