Domain: snpp.com
Stories and comments across the archive that link to snpp.com.
Comments · 940
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where's the perverted arts when we need them
from episode 2F11 (Bart's Comet):
Speaker: Then it is unanimous, we are going to approve the bill to evacuate the town of Springfield in the great state of --
Congressman: Wait a minute, I want to tack on a rider to that bill: $30 million of taxpayer money to support the perverted arts.
Speaker: All in favor of the amended Springfield-slash-pervert bill?
[everyone boos]
Speaker: Bill defeated. [bangs gavel]
Kent: I've said it before, and I'll say it again: democracy simply doesn't work. -
Re:Bigger than Howard Hughes' dream
It's amazing that this giant of an airplane is actually bigger than the legendary Spruce Goose.
Mayhaps it is... but can it best the Spruce Moose ? -
Re:Hmmm.
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Re:EXCLUSIVELYThe quote you're thinking of was in Bart the Daredevil (the one where Bart attempts to jump Springfield Gorge on his skateboard), but I don't recall them using the "only need the edge" line. Google seems to back me up on this..
Here's the full quote, according to Google:
TV Announcer 1: Plus the amazing...
TV Announcer 2: The outstanding...
TV Announcer 3: The unbelievable...
All 3: Truckasaurus!!
TV Announcer 2: Twenty tons and four stories of car-crunching, fire-breathing prehistoric insanity!
TV Announcer 1: One night only!
TV Announcer 2: One night only!
TV Announcer 3: One night only at the Springfield Speedway this Saturday
TV Announcer 1: If you miss this, you better be dead or in jail.
TV Announcer 2: And if you're in jail, break out!
TV Announcer 3: Be there!
</Completely OT>
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Cue Chief Wiggum
Fat Tony is a cancer on this fair city.
He is the cancer, and I am the... um... What cures cancer?
-- Chief Wiggum, "Bart the Murderer" -
Re:Oh holy stupidity
Exactly. You can replace "emergency" with just about anything else (financial, educational, etc.) and likely have a valid, completely new patent with little modification.
I'm vaguely reminded of the Simpson's episode where Homer asks Bart and Lisa to combine two words to make an invention. Although I don't really see an automatic butt being inventable, it seems that if you cover anything in enough patentese the USPTO gives it the green light.
Screw prior art bounties. I'll even whore myself out to raise enough money to reward the first person that gets something patented from the output of an automatic patent generator--see the BBspot Slashdot Story Generator for an example of how ridiculously easy this might be. -
Re:It's Alacritech, isn't it?
Don't forget to give her Smeckler's Powder.
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Re:The Truth About Space Flight
Yeah, you got it. It was actually decribed that way...as railroad monopolies...
Cities like New York, Boston, D.C., and San Francisco have good mass transit system.
Don't forget Chicago :) Great transit to and from both airports! and all over town. Sure is fun whizzing by all the stuck traffic on the expressway.
I take your point about driving to the airport, but remember that we don't use airplanes to commute...
Ever hear of Tom Joyner? What I believe are called regional airlines now, used to be called commuter airlines...or maybe that was commuter airliners...either way, quite a few people do commute by airplane, but lucky for them, they can use smaller, closer to town airports. Meig's Field was right by downtown Chicago. It enjoyed regular commuter service from Springfield, Bloomington, and that other big place down there I can't remember the name of...Champaign! That's it, and Indiana, Michigan, etc. Very little regular service, but it was there. The smaller cities probably have more regular air commuters due to the proximity of their airports. Probably what keeps the regionals afloat. Come to think of it, aren't most of the domestic air travelers actually business flyers? A lot of those travel probably at least twice a week? Aren't they responsible for our "crowded skies"? I don't know how to "google" the question. I can't believe that all those planes are full of vacationers. I've actually noticed a rush hour period at the airports also. Morning and afternoon. To me, a commute by air everyday would be real torture. I simply wouldn't consider it.
Even there, few systems could profitably operate within the private sector.
I wouldn't want to hand it over to the private sector. The benefits of gov't funded public transport are so enormous in terms of peace of mind for the user, the lower pollution and resulting health benefits, the reliablity of a well run system, all these things and many more make up for the taxes taken in. I just feel that the majority is mistaken when they vote against such systems. They probably feel that they would just be robbed. It wouldn't happen that way if they would just stay focused and keep an eye on the money. We can't just hand it to them and say, "Here, build me a train.". A strong will can do amazing things. And...to stay on topic(kinda), all this also applies to our space program. -
My car...
Obligatory Simpsons Quote: "My car gets 40 rods to the hogshead and that's the way I likes it!"
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Re:Simpson know allA related Simpsons quote:
Announcer: Your cable TV is experiencing difficulties. Please, do not panic. Resist the temptation to read or talk to loved ones. Do not attempt sexual relations, as years of TV radiation have left your genitals withered and useless.
Wiggum: [checking under the covers] Well I'll be damned.
Episode 2F18 -
Re:Best Alternatives to /. on April 1???I like to read the episode capsules at the The Springfield Nuclear Power Plant (Simpson's) or The Mantis Eye Experiment (Venture Brother's)
They both have April Fool's stuff on the main page, but you can still get to the capsules.
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Shoeshine, sir? Comb your hair for ya? Sir?
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It's already been invented
i vote for a new ipod, that not only has no screen, and less storage space, but also no controls at all.. it holds 5 songs, just turns on and off at will, and plays whatever the hell it wants at random...
This forms a three-dimensional object known as a "cube", or a "Frinkahedron" in honor of its discoverer, ngu-hey, ng-hey. -
Re:y'know
I think you'll find KWYJIBO a much more cromulent word to use
... http://www.snpp.com/episodes/7G02.html/ -
Re:Extreme fundamentalists are ridiculous.Also please note that nobody cared to dissect the Bible and discern exactly what age it suggested the world to be until we actually had some scientific indication of what age it is. Which is to say, the people originally reading the text were not reading it to determine the age of the universe, &c -- they were reading it for some other (better!) reason, which seems to be lost completely on Biblical literalists.
(I'm reminded of the nerds pointing out continuity errors in "Xena: Warrior Princess" on episode BABF01 of The Simpsons).
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Re:When You get Bored
Yeah but finding another job is really not that difficult.
Depends on where you are. In a big city, this is true, but sometimes Surly Joe really is the only foundation repair company in town, and it'd be wise to look in the phone book first. -
Re:The question is
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ObSimpsons
A decorative wall-hanging is all fine and well, but it adds nothing to the strength or durability of the wall it is hanging on.
Bart: Ah, I wouldn't take it down if I were you. It's a load-bearing poster. (Script.)
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ObSimpsons
Jesse: "I'm still fighting for the earth. I even got 'em to install a solar-powered electric chair."
Snake: [in the solar electric chair] "Dude, we've been here all morning! Could you at least remoisten my head sponge?"
http://www.snpp.com/episodes/CABF01 -
Re:My first Slashdot Simpsons referenceYour post, especially the title, reminded me of the Poochie creation scene from the "Itchy Scratchy and Poochie Show" episode:
Myers: No, no, no! He was supposed to have attitude.
Silverman: Um... wh-what do you mean, exactly?
Myers: Oh, you know, attitude, attitude! Uh... sunglasses!
Lady: Could we put him in more of a "hip-hop" context?
Krusty: Forget context, he's gotta be a surfer. Give me a nice shmear of surfer.
Lady: I feel we should Rasta-fy him by... 10 percent or so.
[the resulting dog is rather... proactive]
[all stare at it w/o any expression]
Myers: Hmm... I think he needs a little more attitude.
[Silverman blackens in Poochie's sunglasses]
All Three: [variously] Oh, yeah, bingo. Yeah, that's it! There it is, right there! I love it!Many thanks to SNPP for the transcript.
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Inspired by TGI Friday's
As Moe would put it, I've got "lotsa crazy crap on the walls":
Two framed 27" x 40" movie posters from the first two Terminator movies.
Between them on a plexi shelf mounted on the wall stands a 14" endoskeleton figure.
A framed share of Apple stock from Oneshare.com.
A few items of memorabilia from the local AHL team's championship season a few years back, including a photo of me holding the Calder Cup (being a season ticketholder has its privileges).
The motherboard from my very first computer, a Tandy 1000 circa 1985.
A (now framed) oversized New Jersey driver's license that I used to use to make fake IDs when I was young and foolish.
A framed marquee from a Q*bert coin-op machine.
Finally, a plush Q*bert doll I bought on eBay, with a homemade foamcore flying disc screwed to his feet dangles from the ceiling via nearly invisible fishing line.
At both my last job and my current job, it was generally agreed that I had the coolest office. -
This message brought to you by the Stonecutters.
"Who controls the British crown?
Who keeps the metric system down?
We do! We do.
Who leaves the Atlantis off the maps? [shot of Carl]
Who keeps the Martians under wraps? [shot of Lenny]
We do! We do. [shot of Martian]
Who holds back the electric car?
Who makes Steve Guttenberg a star? [shot of Steve]
We do! We do.
Who robs cave fish of their sight? [shot of Skinner]
Who rigs every Oscar night? [shot of Homer]
We do! We do." -
Bwahahahaha!
All they had to do to get in was break a window? Yeah, that's some impressive security demonstrated by a fucking government contractor.
Reminds me of the Simpsons episode where Burns has to go into the control room to shut down the power plant. He passes through a bunch of high-security measures and gets into the room, only to find a dog in there who entered through an open screen door on the far wall. -
Re:Spelling Mistake?
> In article title: Not "Governer", "Governor"
The extra "e" is for "electronic democracy" because Governor Dean raised so much money over the Internet.
ahem.
Okay, fine, I'm pretty sure I typed it wrong when I submitted the headline. I deserve all the mocking you can dish out. But for restitution, allow me to offer this appropriate Simpsons quote:
Homer: Look kids! I just got my party invitiations back from the printers.
Lisa: [Reading the invitation.] "Come to Homer's BBBQ. The extra B is for BYOBB."
Bart: What's that extra B for?
Homer: That's a typo. -
i'm thrilled!
i'm just glad professor john frink is finally getting his due. letting him name this probe and mission are going to do wonders for his career, what with the publicity and the notoriety and the ladies and the GLAVEN!!!!!
Frink link -
Re:Instead of OS X...
- Hmmm, I was trying to think of an example of what to put on this and all I could think of was terrorist plans. Does this make it a bad idea?
If you have 1/5th of the data (plus parity) you can even duplicate your iPod Shuffle as needed to keep the data intact.
Just make sure that 4 out of your 5 all fly on the same plane or travel in the same car (or really, attend the same conference) with their share of the data.
You can also scale it up and down (4 drives needing 3 or 25 drives needing 24).
The only downside with RAID5 is that you can only lose 1 device, so with larger numbers you need a higher and higher majority of your group to unlock the data.
Another idea is to RAID the data and form a tontine using iPod Shuffles. It worked for Abe Simpson.
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Re:Do we need a 'Timely' modifier?
Was August 21, 1992 a Sunday? That's when the episode featuring the "First Annual Montgomery Burns Award for Outstanding Achievement in the Field of Excellence" first aired.
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Re:So does that make these
Simpsons reference: 8F23.
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Re:Do we need a 'Timely' modifier?
Actually, that episode is over 12 years old.
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Re:There's no sympathy in corporateville...
"The ultimate goal of large content providers is to create a world where they take your money
each and every time you view their content. NO EXCEPTIONS!"The parent posting is on target, but I'd like to add this observation from seeing the same thing happen in the Simpsons world.
The producers of content depend on the imaginations of consumers to embrace their product, whether it be anime or Simpsons episodes.
success == profit == consumer enthusiasm
== consumer desire to share/contribute back/develop a community of like-minded consumers .Unless the content producers understand that it's not a zero-sum game and accept the nature of this relationship and integrate consumers into their product, they won't make as much money as they otherwise could, and we'll continue to see these battles and everyone involved will feel unappreciated and abused.
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obligatory simpsons
Willy:
...I have a cripplin' arthritis in me index fingerrrs. Look at 'em! [holds them up] I got it from "Space Invaders" in 1977.
Wiggum: Aw, yeah. That was a pretty addictive video game.
Willy: [surprised] Video game?
SNPP -
ObSimp
and Microsoft was soon to follow regarding the Xbox Next
Sure, the X-Box looks impressive, but I predict that the X-Box Next will be twice as powerful, ten thousand times larger, and so expensive that only the five richest kings of Europe will own one.(Thanks, Simpsons!)
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Re:That would be playing god.
That's ridiculous. You do nothing but play God, and I think your octo-parrot would agree.
[points to a creature with the body and head of a parrot, but with tentacles instead of wings and legs]
Polly: Awk! Polly shouldn't be!
(credit: snpp) -
Re:Exactly!Precisely. To illustrate the absurdity of market demand for this feature, I'll oblibatorily quote the Simpsons:
% Ms. White claims that only US$10,000 more is needed before the
% conclusion of "Do Shut Up" can roll. Eager to get things moving as
% quickly as possible, Homer dials the PBS pledge number and promises
% the entire ten grand -- anonymously.
Bart: Dad, you don't have ten thousand dollars.
Homer: Eh. How are they going to find me?
[at PBS Pledge Central, the "mercury" in a thermometer
display rises all the way to the top and rings a bell]
White: Folks, we've just reached our goal of ten thousand, seven
hundred dollars, and it's all thanks to one generous
caller ... who didn't leave his name.
Homer: [laughs]
White: But thanks to Insta-Trace, we've learned it's Homer
Simpson, of 742 Evergreen Terrace. [a picture of Homer
appears on the screen. He screams]
Homer: Oh, why did I register with Insta-Trace? -
Re:News for Nerds? Not likely!
Actually you're wrong.
The Simpsons, created by cartoonist Matt Groening (and named for the members of his immediate family except for Bart, which is an anagram for Brat), first appeared in 1987 as a series of 30-second spots produced for the Emmy Award-winning variety series The Tracey Ullman Show.
http://www.snpp.com/other/articles/briefhistory.ht ml/ -
Re:D'oh
Roughly five to ten O's have been omitted. Homer's trademark expression was voice actor Dan Castellaneta's interpretation "[ANNOYED GRUNT]" (which is how "D'oh!" has always been written in scripts for Simpsons episodes). It's based on the "Dooooooooooh!" from the Laurel and Hardy routines, only shortened considerably. Source
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Re:What's the name of that movie?
source
Apu: I'm hoping you enjoy this movie. It made every Indian critic's top 400 list.
Woman: [singing] Love love love love love! I'm in love with lovely Johnny.
[an Indian man breaks through a window and curses in Hindi at three sitting men]
[they all start dancing]
Bart: This movie you rented sucks.
Homer: No it doesn't, it's funny! Their clothes are different from my clothes.
[laughs] Look at what they're wearing!
[laughs more]
-- "Homer and Apu" -
Re:Still... I think america wins on this oneIt is and remains to be the largest aircraft ever built
Bigger than The Plywood Pelican??!! http://www.snpp.com/episodes/FABF16
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Re:Don't call it a "BitTorrent Arrest"
There's actually a Simpsons reference to this that I never got until now.
"Avenge my death, Kimba -- I mean, Simba" -
Re:Clown College
I thought Bush went to Yale rather than Princeton.
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Re:Lots of info left out of the summary...
Homer: I reluctantly accept your proposal!
-- Bill Gates buys Homer's Internet company, "Das Bus"
Bill Gates: Well everyone always does. Buy 'em out, boys!
[Gates' lackeys trash the room.]
Homer: Hey, what the hell's going on!
Bill Gates: Oh, I didn't get rich by writing a lot of checks! [insane
laughter] -
Re:So thieves just...
Incorrect.
From Boy Scoutz 'N the Hood
Homer: Hmm...ow, pointy!
Eww, slimy.
Oh, moving!
Ah-ha! Oh, twenty dollars...I wanted a peanut!
Homer's brain: Twenty dollars can buy many peanuts!
Homer: Explain how.
Homer's brain: Money can be exchanged for goods and services. -
Re:Camouflage is easy
Actually, spy satellites are labeled as property of Major League Baseball
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Re:I for one welcome...
if you really, really must say it, do it right!
"I for one ... OVERLORDS"
like Kent Brockman in Deep Space Homer :
And I, for one, welcome our new insect overlords.
I'd like to remind them that as a trusted TV personality,
I can be helpful in rounding up others to toil in their underground sugar caves. -
Big deal
What's everyone so worked up about? So there's a comet -- big deal. It'll burn up in our atmosphere and what's ever left will be no bigger than a chihuahua's head.
-- http://www.snpp.com/episodes/2F11.html -
Re:The truth
Maybe next time they should leave behind Homer Simpson
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Re:News?Nice ASCII illustration but you forgot the punchline:
Burns: I'm going to write a figure on this piece of paper. It's not quite as large as the last one, but I think you'll find it fair. [draws a giant zero]
Hutz: I think we should take it.
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Re:Google Suggest just isn't very useful
Dude, you didn't add a way to get people to get the reference. How are the countless moderators supposed to now that the reference was from Simpson Episode [2F05] - "Lisa on Ice" in which the following happened:
In the auditorium, Skinner speaks to the children.
Skinner: Children, the times they are a-becoming quite different. Test scores are at an all-time low, so I've come up with these academic alerts. [hold stack of cards] You will receive one as soon as your grades start to slip in any subject. This way your parents won't have to wait until report card time to punish you.
Martin: How innovative. I like it!
Kearney: Hey Dolph, take a memo on your Newton: beat up Martin.
[Dolph writes "Beat up Martin" which the Newton translates as "Eat up Martha"] Bah! [throws Newton]
Martin: [being bonked on the head] Ow!
Source -
Re:No Reg Required...
Mmm, "forbidden donut."
:) -
Re:Space men
Why not breed a dog with a cat, and produce man's best friend who ignores him?
That's not what you get. You get a miracle hybrid, with the loyalty of a cat and the cleanliness of a dog.