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Get Your New Handheld...in Butter.
Wow. That's about all I can say to the 50 pound PDA made out of butter currently on eBay. Obviously, the Dairy Council got to them.
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I wish I could post the crap that I'm selling on Ebay to Slashdot, I'd get better sales for sure!
great, now i need to keep my PDA below 30C.
You must defeat Sheng Long to stand a chance.
... can it run Linux?
Computers are useless. They can only give you answers. -- Pablo Picasso
Around here butter goes for about $4 a lb...
Who knows how high the bidding will get, but it's a good deal at the moment.
Plus butter goes great with hot grits.
I see no reason anyone would want this. What are you supposed to do with it when you win? surely not anything on their top ten list. The only thing to do with a big hunk of butter in the shape of a palm is to be laughed at.
Mmmmmm, now thats an OS that runs creamy smooth.
-- TriviaMan "I offered my honor She honored my offer So all night long, I was on her and off her."
I can't believe its not Palm!
I don't know which is weirder. The fact that someone actually made this and is selling it on ebay, the fact that someone has actually placed a bid on it, or the fact that it made it to slashdot. I think my favorite things to see sold on ebay yet though were people who were selling their virginity, or their souls. Even if you never buy anything off ebay, it's fun just to type in some random word and see what comes up. :)
Anyone know the freshness date on the butter palm? Or maybe the butter palm is for people who have butter for their hands and are always dropping their palm-pilot/cellphone
[Something witty and intelligent should have appeared here.]
{Traicovn}
What are the dimensions of 50lbs of butter?
.. I can't believe it's butter.
I'm sure that using all that butter you could make and sculpt at least 3 mac n cheese palms....
is a Venus de Milo in butter, some bread, and I'd be set for life.
Do You Have Stairs In Your House?
"...no, I told him I thought the latest Palm designs were cheesy!"
Ahem.
Damn, it's a sculpture.
:-)
I thought it's a real PDA.
If we were to make one of these the same way, would that be an iMac and cheese?
Butter doesn't conduct static electricity, so all hotsync'ing problems should go away :)
---- Please be nice in case my Slashdot karma ~= my real life karma.
I've heard of greasing palms before, but this is ridiculous...
The organizational meeting of the Jon Katz loves butter society has been postponed. It will be held on the slashnet IRC channel #JonKatzIsGod on Monday at 5pm.
Jon has assured me that the "boxers vs. briefs" debate will be held. There will also be a Jon Katz expert that will talk about his affect on social stuctures and economic trends in the homosexual native american tribes in the Pacific northwest.
We'll then ajourn to the private pool for "fun".
As soon as I read this I knew there was only one place in the world where this would be done, the Minnesota state fair. Every year there is a "beauty contest" and the winner along with the runners up get a butter sculpture in the likeness of their head (the winner represents the Minnesota dairy industry). So now there are a number of groups around who do things like this. I didn't expect people to try and make money off of it, though.
It's the Mother Teresa bun for our modern, secular age!
Talk about getting greasy palms.
It looks like it didn't win any prizes in the dairy products or sculpture categories. Shame, it looks good.
As usual..
"Imagine a Beowulf cluster of..."
You must defeat Sheng Long to stand a chance.
OY, my cholesterol
I'll be up at the State Fair this weekend. I hope the butter PDA is still there so I can try to pass it a virus. You think it's got a port for me to 'plug in'?
BTW, the butter sculpting is one of the grand old traditions at the Minnesota State Fair, the biggest state fair in the USA. The State Fair queen gets her likeness carved out of butter every year, and I know they sent David Letterman a bust of himself a few years ago.
.sig
You forgot the punchline about the 50 lb. PDA of butter fitting in there. Stay on topic!
At the Minnesota State Fair, the regional Dairy Princesses have their likenesses carved into a 90 lb block of butter. It's one of the big attractions every year at the Fair.
The cure for cancer is coming: Reovirus
10. Gives a whole new meaning to "palm oil".
9. Runs so smooth... it's like butter.
8. Stupid character recognition... I wrote "butter", but all it will say is "Parkay".
7. Gives a whole new meaning to "butter fingers".
6. And to think, they said my computer would be no substitute for a girlfriend. Boy, were THEY wrong.
5. First ever computer with a "best used by" date.
4. Would you like your PDA salted or unsalted?
3. Gives a whole new meaning to "memory churn".
2. I think heat dissipation is going to be a problem.
And the number 1, absolute LAMEST joke about the Butter PDA:
1. I think I've milked this long enough.
What's really scary is that several of us stood around the display cooler and admired it for a bit.
i'm gonna buy this thing, melt it in a 40-gallon cast iron frying pan, and cook myself a 120-lb Windows PC made out of CHICKEN!!!
At long last! She can cook my dinner with it and then when we're done I can rub it all over her and have mad kinky sex with her.
Thanks EBAY!
Don't think that a small group of dedicated individuals can't change the world. It's the only thing that ever has.
Reminds me of the butter sculpture of N.C's own "Sodfather", Jim Grahm, (ex-Commisioner of Agriculture), at the N.C. State Fair.
And if you win, how the hell do you ship something like this. The seller has neglected to include the most important nugget.
What major shipping carrier will ship a 50lb chunk of butter with a promise not to melt it?
Maybe this is more of a proof of concept thing -- to see if people really *will* buy any old shit on Ebay.
No sig is worth reading.
"Dairy Princess" thats code for lactating dominatrix, right?
I can't help but wonder if Miguel uses one of these.
hoping your rules and wisdom choke you, since 1976
For the last time, Quit Playing With Your Food!
Behold the [processor] power of Cheese!
--G
A PDA made out of butter? What a greasy marketing trick.
Now we know what The Evil Business Guy Made Of Butter used for a PDA!
Does this promote software bloat?
Computers are useless. They can only give you answers. -- Pablo Picasso
Yes, that's right, it's a fake. Proof? Consider the following:
- The picture shows the words "Palm VII x" across the top, but there is no antenna visible on the right side of the unit.
- The unit itself seems to be out of proportion with real VII x's by nearly 7 millimeters width.
- The "Login" button on the front screen is missing the "send information" icon (looks like waves moving out from a point) that is the staple of almost all Palm Portal online applications.
- The front panel buttons seem to be positioned wrong. The real up and down buttons on VII x's are centered approximately 3.5 mm farther down.
- The "cradle" this unit is sitting in is cleary missing the Palm logo on the front, as well as any visible HotSync button.
- The entire unit seems to be yellow in color and made of butter. This may be a result of a bad picture, but real VII x's are made of plastic and are black in color, with the distinctive "Palm green" monochrome screen.
Cleary this is the work of someone very skilled in Photoshop. I wonder if this is a retaliation by Palm after the recent FCC screwup with their new i705, to try and generate more interest in the VII x? Or perhaps it is the work of Palm-knockoff pirate organizations in Tailand or China, eager to flood the PDA hungry US market with cheap, imitation Palms.
The best part is that they actually put a RESERVE PRICE on it. As if it's got enough shelf life for them to really wait for the best price...for a CHARITY AUCTION no less. Bwhahaha...
------
Let me give you the lowdown
but I backed up their entire site to my local server!
All jokes aside, you know a piece of technology has become a cultural phenomenon when some person (or people) take the time to create it's likeness in a statue of butter.
My sigs always suck.
It isn't that big, nor is it all that impressive. You guys should see the butter heads they have at the Fair - all of the royal court, lead by "Princess Kay of the Milky Way."
I know I'm a goon for saying this, but it's a pretty cool sight. I'm disappointed because there seems to be less and less of a family farming feel to the fair every year.
My Karma was at 49, then they switched to words. All that work for nothing!
1/3 of the ingredients to the world's biggest cake...
it's for charity. The money goes to 4H.. although the reserve is probably a little out of my budget.
-- Is "Sig" copyrighted by www.sig.com?
... at opening bid, that's 50 pounds of butter for 50 dollars. Have you checked your dairy case prices lately?
-- Jeff Paulsen
I can't believe it's butter :)
Someone makes a 50LBS "Tux the Penguin" out of butter and puts it on eBay? If so, will Bill Gates buy one so he can bite the head off? What about the BSD Daemon? Butter sculptures raise serious questions.
---
Did you hear the one about the modem that short-circuited every computer it was connected to?
We called it the "serial killer"!
Dry Ice : $10.00
Shipping Costs : $40.00
Being able to update your schedule and check off items on your to-do list by eating breakfast?
Priceless
Some things in life you can't put a price on, for everything else, there's the Butter Palm ©
[Something witty and intelligent should have appeared here.]
{Traicovn}
"Rather than see the world's first, largest, and most beautiful, Butter PDA go to waste, we recognized the market demand for such an item [Emphasis personally added]and now offer it to the public in a charity auction."
Who was polled in this market study, a tub of Parkay?
Interviewer: "What sort of changes or enhancements would need to be made to handheld computers of today to make you more likely to purchase one in the future?"
Small Plastic Tub: "Butter."
Marketing Department: *ding*
Marge: Homer, is that my good butter?
Homer: Quiet Marge! I'm trying to work. And now to write another delicious memo.
Mmmmmmmmm...memo.
JET Program: see Japan, meet intere
Now, this is lame. When I see a PDA made out of peanut butter, then we'll talk (creamy or crunchy? Now, there's a great flame war).
"Trust me - I know what I'm doing."
- Sledge Hammer
They can keep reselling this thing too. Just ship the winner a bucket of melted butter and say "the deliver truck must have overheated... sorry."
So how do you ship a 50 pound slab of butter? In any case I'd get it insured. :)
If you drop it, which side lands down?
-- I have monkeys in my pants.
and my story submissions about athlons and p4s and new hardware and comparisons don't get posted, and I never see any other stories about them either...
if ( random(10) == 0 )
accept_submission();
else
reject_submission();
If God gave us curiosity
I guess this means truly thin computing isn't quite here yet, at least not if the fellow who buys it uses it all on his buttered corn. :)
A truly excellent pizza parlor is a delight unto the heavens. Treasure the sauce and the toppings!
There is a business card for the sculptor in the case. It says he is immediately available. So next time I need a butter sculpture in a hurry, I'll know who to call. Or rather, I won't, because he wasn't beaming his card out of the butter PDA.
ObOffTopic: it was right next to the Unisys booth. They were demoing an electronic voting system. plover and I both voted twice (if you remove the smart card from the reader after it authenticates you at the beginning of the transaction but before you complete it lets you vote again). I hear it's already installed in Florida.
--
E_NOSIG
Its when you shove your hand up your ass like this...then you shake their hand. The smell lasts for days...
They should have the Battle Bot people outbid one another to have the privledge of cutting it up in the Battle Bot competition only a few blocks away on Machinery Hill.
Imagine that--the home-constructed battle bots competing to smash the butter PDA to bits. Butter everywhere, bots covered in butter, the fans covered in butter, the bots beating one another up.
Alas, I couldn't see anything at the Battle Bot competion because it was too crowded. Oh well.
The MN state fair is so awesome...
much butter than the one I'm using now. With the larger screen you can make notes in the margarine and not just the body of the document. And what a spread(sheet) application! Video scrolls very smoothly pasturize as you watch full screen MooPGs and PowerPint presentations.
Many pundits have had a cow over this thing, some going so far as to declare it udderly ridiculous. Others believe it will saturate the market as readily as this reporter's pants and shirt. If the producers stick to their plans, this device should pound the competition within the next quart-er. Of course, that's provided they don't let this opportunity slip through their fingers. There is some concern about keeping up with demand and they may have to farm out some of the manufacturing to avoid a melt-down if things begin to heat up.
--
As a matter of fact, I am a lawyer. But I play an actor on TV.
This kind of blatant merchandising really churns me up. I mean, you know they're skimming right off the top.
-schussat
The hour of noon has passed. Let us go and get some Kentucky Fried Chicken.
We've known for some time that Palm and Handspring operated on razor-thin profit margarines.
When all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a skull.
w...t...f...
very cheap butter
Smile... tomorrow will be worse.
Okay, this has got to be Stef Murky's idea. :)
I can't belive it's not a PDA!
ha! it's been slashdotted and only has 5 bids!
slashdot my socks and you'd get more bids.
Do we rate it in calories or MHz (mega-herdz)?
-- I have monkeys in my pants.
Why is there a reserve price? It would be foolish for the seller to think they could make money selling a giant butter sculpture (let alone one that looks like a PDA). They should be trying as hard as they possibly can to get rid of it...
Then there's the continual monetary drain due to needing to keep the sculpture refrigerated (who has a refrigerator that big?). They must pay someone to keep it refrigerated for them.
If I were the seller, I'd have no reserve and a low "Buy Now" price. Come to think of it, if I were the seller, I never would have ended up with a fifty pound butter PDA in the first place.
This is just what that American Pie kid needs.
Can I hot sync it with my fridge?
void women (int money, time_t time);
but the Newton had a 70-lb shortening version about 6 years ago. It had difficulty with handwriting because of a faulty butter knife attachment.
Prior to that, I understand NEC had managed to create a dried-apple head version of a cash register, but the disturbing pop-up No Sale key frightened young children.
Beware typoes.
anyone can clearly see this particular butter palm is the non-fuctioning display demo they use in comp usa. the real butter palms are kept in a refrigerator under the counter.
when religion is no longer the opiate of the masses, governments will resort to real opiates.
A NEW HOPE
Under the site's "Top 10 things to do with a 50lb butter PDA":
4. Healthy Midwestern snack that melts in your mouth not in your Palm
Putting aside the obvious issue of how 50lbs of butter can possibly be healthy, who on earth eats straight butter for a snack?
(Well, I suppose that somebody does, but they probably gave it up after their quadruple-bypass.)
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Digital pants...ACTIVATE!
I build model citizens.
Has anyone told Compaq they used the wrong bovine output when they built the iPaq?
...Beowulf cholesterol these!
~Philly
Her 2000 creation was The Last Supper. This year it was John Wayne (life size) (sorry I couldn't find a pic online). She's been at it for decades. If I recall correctly, she made a cheddar pig once for Late Night with David Letterman once.
I'd've skipped Dylan to attend the "I Milked a Cow" exhibit.
At the bottom of the page it mentions that this will be for the 4-H Foundation.
Pack some crackers around it, and present it as a snack tray at a Handspring developer's confrence.
Lunch for my highschool gym teacher
Pack a dozen m80s in the middle during the M$ presentation at comedex...
Leave it in the hotel lobby at Defcon. Nuff said.
Tell Condit there's a cute intern in the middle.
Carve a Windows CE startup screen on it, and sacrifice at in a satanic ritual by slowly lowering it into the fire
Feed it to the neighbor's rotweiler- Give em diarrea for life.
It's for the children!
Tell Micheal Jackson theres a little boy in the middle.
Cowboy Neal
For archived ones (like the kidney) check out http://www.whattheheck.com/ebay
That's great but does it support Ogg Vorbis? If not, I'm not buying.
Butter John Wayne: Party on, Garth!
Butter Garth Brooks: Party on, Wayne!
(Easy karma... Ka-shing!)
Tongue-tied and twisted, just an earth-bound misfit, I
Learning to fly, Pink Floyd.
...which makes it worth while to waste a whole afternoon reading Slashdot.
Tongue-tied and twisted, just an earth-bound misfit, I
Learning to fly, Pink Floyd.
Can you imagine a beowulf cluster of these babies?
They forgot to mention in the item description that for a fee you could have your Palm ViiB "upgraded" to an i705b.
The New York State Fair has a butter sculpture every year. It's usually the size of a refrigerator. A couple of years ago, it *was* a refrigerator, with milk, eggs, and cheese in it. A couple of kids were stealing the chocolate milk out of it, and had spilled some.
Yeah, and the whole thing was made out of butter.
-russ
Don't piss off The Angry Economist
Yup, 4-H needs your support. It's more than animals and plants. This year and last year my daughter (okay, so I'm bragging now--shoot me if I'm proud of my children) won the North/Central district public presentation contest. Last year was about paper-making and this was about Sheep to Shawl, past and present. Talked about how wool comes from sheep, yarn comes from wool, and sweaters come from wool.
-russ
Don't piss off The Angry Economist
Losers! Everyone knows the ButterIpaq runs much faster, and is in color too. Sure, the ButterPalm has a better shelf life, but that won't help you play Quake.
What's next on eBay? 50 pounds of butter made from Belgium Palm-beer?
bash$
funny!
This thing is so retared it would prob melt in a couple of hours.
--------
http://www.softstyle.com
Till NetBSD is ported to the butter palm?
Stop over-analyzing your analizations
Obviously, Randy Fry (or whoever the guy on the "Direct Connect" fliers is) should buy this and reverse engineer it.
Think about it, his chain already sells Chocolate notebooks and cellular phones...
It's not "there's always someone better than you", it's "there's alway someone more HARDCORE than you."
Ok as of right now the price is $360 and the reserve is not yet met... i seem to recall going to a charity auction before and usually what ever it sells for is what goes to charity... also WTF is the reserve on a 50lb chunk of butter (even if its a wonderful sculpture of a palm) this is not something that you can pass on to your grandchildren.
This must be Thursday, I never could get the hang of Thursdays.
(GRIN!)
I can't decide if this best represents what happens when rednecks and technology cross, or if that title still belongs to AOL..