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Enlightenment goes 1.0
ChrisJones writes "According to rasterman, Enlightenment has hit 1.0!
Tarball is available here. Happy building!" And you guys all thought it would never happen! BGDM!
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Enlightenment 1.0... puh-lease
either its april fools or hell froze over
Is Duke Nukem Forever next? ;-)
Acquiescence leads to obliteration
...Or people will feel my wrath for tempting me with the thing I want MOST!
Machine9dotNet
...install a version 1.0 of a product release. Wait for the patches, or you might corrupt your Nirvana installs...
John Maynard Keynes: "When the facts change, I change my mind. What do you do?"
I was so excited. Then I looked at the date. BAH!
I have to change my underpants now.
__________________________________________
Take comfort in your ignorance.
Grandmaster Plague
Yeah, enlightenment is still at its .16 release.
The next Slashdot story will be ready soon, but subscribers can beat the rush and slashdot the links early!
You can always tell it was only a joke....
I've been running it under the Berlin windowing system on my GNU/Hurd box for 12 hours, and it r0x...
Its really helped my productivity. I've got an amazing amount of work done today.
[OK, I admit it. That last bit was clearly an April Fool]
Athletic Scholarships to universities make as much sense as academic scholarships to sports teams.
This is the most obvious April Fools yet :-)
I'd be surprised if Enlightenment ever hits .20.
Who in their right mind would ever *actually* release a product on April 1st?
:P
At least, not in the open software world...
I remember in years past, you had to really look closely at a /. story on April 1 because the fake stories were so well-woven. This year, they aren't even trying and even worse, they're posting dupes!
Somehow I knew this was going to happen today :D ...they could at least put *something* up instead of a dead link though
If you have trouble reaching enlightenment, try improving your karma ;)
Duke Nukem Forever goes gold!!! Micosoft releases a completly secure operating system!!!!! RIAA decides p2p networks are usefull!!!!
I hate you Taco, I really, REALLY hate you...
Machine9dotNet
Speaking of bad jokes, my wife's coworkers tried to get her to call me and say she was in labor (she's actually due on Thursday). I'm so sick with anticipation that I think the false alarm would literally kill me.
Duke Nukem Forever has gone gold.
Daikatana 2 is on its way.
Microsoft releases security patches for security patches found during internal security testing.
----
Is it just me or were the April 1 jokes better in previous years...
Microsoft says that it will contain the Enlightenment 1.0 in its upcoming Windows 2003 Server.
If you believe that, here's the rest of them
Happy Aprils Fools!
why the reference to bondage? BGDM? Is Taco trying to tell us something? ;)
because it conincides with my dyslexic friends celebration of "Polar Foils" day. Or was it "Flora Spoil" day? "Frail Loops"? "Sailor Flop"? "Pail Floors"?
Error: Erection reset by beer.
However, the link to the tarball being a 404 is a dead giveaway :(
I don't have the exact link handy, but surf over to goatse.cx and you should find it off of the main page.
...Linus has ditched BitKeeper for Visual SourceSafe!
thelocust[dot]org
For an April fool 'joke' to be worthwhile IMHO it should be not obvious that is is untrue and also be funny for those who have worked it out while others have not.
Providing a clickable like in the article which immediately shows the story to be false just isn't clever enought to be funny
I'm not always a killjoy but this is the fourth time today (excluding dupes)
N
xcdroast 1.0 released
gentoo 1.4 released
smell that? smells kinda like vaporware...
of course there's plenty to add to this list..
Thanks a lot Rasterman! We've all been looking forward to E17, with its EFM, EVAs, and the rest of the toys. But now you've made a joke. Shame on you.
Well, let's make the joke on you!
Raster live in Australia, where it is now actuallt April 2nd, which kind of pins the joke on him.
But even more fun: Raster lists his Australian mobile phone number on his homepage!
It's about 1AM in Australia now. Why don't you thank him with an SMS to 61 413 451 89.
I hate being pranked! Revenge is so very sweet!
(This is a joke people. Pranking in fun!)
The slashdot link to the enlightenment news page works but the link to the long waited 1.0 does not work- what is up with that? If I can't have my e I will have to settle for my h.
with team fortress 2
damn.. guess it was an April's fool joke
:(
Worst of all is that today morning I was thinking on testing e17, when I saw the title I went directly to their page and found an 404 Error page, then realized it was April 1st
Next they will tell us Enlightenment has standardized the look and feel to be a button-down Windows 95 look-alike.
No customization allowed!
If I'm gonna get fired for reading Slashdot all day at work, at least I wanna read something USEFUL!!!
Gotta go, here comes the boss.
I have to wait another like 14 hours or something here on da East Coast(tm). Everyone wish me a happy birthday or I'll use windows. I'm serious!
MUSIC promotes MTV
Everyone wish me a happy birthday
No.
I'm not a prophet or a stone-age man,
I'm just a mortal with potential of a super man.
Everybody could just save the time and instead of reading Slashdot today, just go to this page and read 10 or so "articles". Works the same...
Marcelo Vanzin
Enlightenment, 1.0?? Someone mispost?? Oh, April 1. you say ...
:)
News at 11:
- Microsoft launches WindowsLinux
- Linus Torvalds declares Linux dead switching to BSD
Well at least I got to see rasterman's pretty good page and I think we could all agree that we all want his car
Look a monkey!
Great, so now I can use Enlightenment 1.0 with new RedHat 9!
... it's April 1st ... Enlighenment 1.0 isn't really out, is it, and ... AGH!! those hours spent downloading the RH9 iso's were just an April Fool's Joke?! /me goes off to kill himself.
Wait
Cyde Weys Musings - Scrutinizing the inscrutable
That really really helps me figure out that it does or does not interste me.
I'd just like to review the 'jokes' so far... call it Flamebait, if you want to, but it just annoys me and I have to say it...
This one was nice. Obvious, but nice... as usual, the RFC people are doing a good job. Too bad Slashdot ruined it with the first April Fools dupe...
Well, good idea of the Gentoo people, but waaay too obvious... imho a good AF joke is one you believe to be true for at least a couple of minutes until you've looked at it very closely. But OK, this was only number 2, so it was still nice... now AF story bloat yet.
Hm. As has been pointed out, it's not new... and even more obvious than the previous one (and pretty much boring too). I think then CPAN people know how to really make a good AF joke...
Hey... better at least. Nicely combining a true story with a joke story... though the joke was not very believable either. Also, it's number four already, and we're only half-way through the day...
OK. By itself, not all that bad... but not too overwhelming either. And, on Slashdot, we're now at Number 5 and counting.
OK, increasingly stupid... but then again, maybe the best joke today on Slashdot
Aawwww, come on. Enough. It hurts. And again, blunt joke. Latency between reading and noting the joke:
For some quality 4-1 jokes, see here (German), the above-mentioned cpan.org, or even the Freshmeat one which isn't so bad. This ain't so bad either. Kuro5hin points to this interesting link.
Can you /. editors pleease try to come up with a single good hoax and dump the rest? That would be nice.
</rant>Even our April Fool pranks are dorky
Wow! I just grabbed the tarball, and did the autoconf, configure, make jig. I must say I am impressed! First of all, the size of the installation is pretty small compared to all other environments. AND... this really beats the pants off of KDE and GNOME. As usual, there is lots of innovation. All the window widgets can be moved around to suit the needs and tastes of the user rather than forcing them to use one style. They've added the ability to incorporate scents into the themes! (I am using the Evergreen scent right now... Ahhh fresh!) But what's impressed me the most so far is the predictive nature of the interface. There is some mechanism that Raster has worked out to detect the readiness potential in your brain before you actually click on something. This results in menus and objects performing operations just before you actually decide to utilize those menus and objects. Pretty slick! So far it's been dead on every time. as I think, Mozilla is loading up web pages and links in extra tabs behind this page. Kind of interesting to find out what you are going to look at just a fraction of a second before you realize it. The file manager is JUST INCREDIBLE!!! No more of that silly hierarchical jazz... Now we finally have a file manager that works just like we think. For any document you create, the files are offloaded to paper hardcopies. This results in a more tangible object with a limited, but pretty reliable user interface. To re-open and edit the file, You just slam it on the flatbed and E 1.0 will automatically scan and OCR it back into the application of your choice! How cool is that? the best thing is that you no longer have to worry about magnetic media failure with regard to your docs. Ahhh.. I think I'm in love! Enlightenment 1.0, you light up my life!
-"...bad old ideas look confusingly fresh when they are packaged as technology" - Jaron Lanier (Digital Maoism on Edge.o
Or people will feel my wrath for tempting me with the thing I want MOST!
I just though I'd point out that you will never, ever get laid. You will die a virgin, I promise you that.
Moderators, please just chill out. It had to be said.
Join Tor today!
*Dances in the street light*
An April Fool's joke about Enlightenment 1.0 being released would work much better had not Slashdot run the serious story about how Enlightenment .17 is still a way off. Some of us have these things called memories =)
"Oh, I hope he doesn't give us halyatchkies," said Heinrich.
It looks like the server is slashdotted, because All I get is a 404 error.
Fortunately some friends of E have posted a mirror. here
Just for giggles, when you finally decide it's time to release a 1.0, release it on April 1.
Come on folks.
The E people add a 0.01 every 8 months. How long you think it will be before they get to 1?
Not in your lifetime.
Hey, at least they can laugh at themselves, more than you can say for a lot in the linux community
-Looking for a job as a materials chemist or multivariat
If you really want to reach enlightenment, you'd better start by not using X at all. ;-)
Escher was the first MC and Giger invented the HR department.
I know it's April Fools and all, but some jokes are just plain mean..
Time travel is possible. We are quickly heading for 1984.
go look at the anouncment page....it says 1.0 is out, but then look at the top right corner, stable is 16.5 and unstable is 17.
I am the Alpha and the Omega-3
Linux comes one step closer to being just like Windows!
I used to be a MS fan but then I was brainwashed. Now I see the Light. Mac OS X pwns u.
Hi. This is my usual rant about Slashdot articles announcing that Some-Random-Name has reached Version N+1 or added Some-Generic-Feature-Like-Themes without saying what the product actually is or does. (Of course, people who don't know Enlightenment's version history won't get the April Fools' Joke here...)
Bill Stewart
New Fast-Compression-only CPR http://preview.tinyurl.com/dy575ks
I would have expected better co-operation on this prank. I'm guessing Rasterman went to the effort of editiing the webpage in the new section. The stable version on the top of the page is/was still listed as 0.16.5 and CVS as 0.17. That was a dead give away.
Now, if this story gets posted tommorrow then I will be happy since it will presumably be true. Otherwise, the mods are definately slacking off.
I got fished in by this one because I wanted it to be true...
Information wants to be $1.98/lb.
According to the CVS, the other option was to post : "Today the Enlightenment team announces the culmination of many months of neogtiations. Enlightenment will be sold to Microsoft Corp. and all the technology will be applied to the upcoming releases of the Windows(R) Operating system."
The memory management on the PowerPC can be used to frighten small children. -Linus
And yes, in fact I did hear that the word gullible isn't in the dictionary. Thanks for pointing that out. Yeah.
Grr. I know better, right? RIGHT?
I'm only wearing black until they come out with something darker.
I'll be happily browing the web with Phallus 0.7 on my Enlightenment 1.0 setup any minute now!
Linus Torvalds is dying!
Enlightenment 1.0? An April's Fool joke, right?
This is what they want you to believe.
But the shocking truth is... Enlightenment was sold to Microsoft! The joke is just a cover. And I have the proof!
Prescriptive grammar:linguistics
Yes, but can it filter my Spam?
I was going to put a sig here, but I had already submitted the message.
I think geeks need to improve in this department, somewhat. The Spaghetti Harvest was a work of sheer creative brilliance, despite the simplicity of the sketch and the simplicity of the props.
These are the kinds of pranks that work well, and are remembered. So simple, it's "got to be true", without assuming that the audience is as simple as the prank.
I'll give this year's attempts a 3/5 for effort, 4/5 for volume, and 2/5 for the "got to be true" factor. Hey, that's not a bad score, but it does show that this is an area that needs practice.
It's a small world and it smells funny; I'd buy another if it wasn't for the money; Take back what I paid (SoM)
It started 300 years ago and they're on 1.0 now??
P.S. masq, I hate to point this out, but that other guy you're talking to - he's you! It looks like you're suffering from a condition known as Post-Slashdot-sucking stress disorder (PSSSD or PS3D), in which the very boundaries of your personality begin to dissolve when you find that the high-quality, informative and unbiased content you've become used to (wait - which site is this again?) is taken away and replaced by a bunch of failed, grade-school-level attempts at humor.
There's only one cure, and it isn't easy: do not, under any circumstances, read Slashdot for the rest of the day. Like I said, it won't be easy. If you find your hands shaking, cut back on the coffee and penguin mints, and try some peppermint or camomile tea.
It may help to set up a support group amongst those of your co-workers who also read Slashdot. You can tell which ones they are by observing whether their hands are shaking. Once you're all gathered in the break room, you all sit in a circle and stand up in turns and say "My name is Mark oops I mean masq and I'm addicted to Slashdot."
You're then supposed to generally bond with and comfort each other. However, this usually devolves into incoherent angry yelling and threats when two people in the circle discover that they are mortal enemies on Slashdot, but hadn't previously known each other's real identities or that they were only separated by a few thin cubicle walls. At this point, you should get up and lock the door, then announce that no-one is getting out until all of your differences are resolved. Why, you'll hardly notice the rest of the day go by!
Tommorrow, Slashdot will be back to normal. Just remember, whatever you do, do not click the link labelled "Yesterday's edition", otherwise the whole sorry cycle will begin again...
According to Microsoft Chairman Bill Gates, "Ricky and I go back a long way. I have always respected his outlook on software intellectual property rights. It turns out he was right all along; companies don't need to make money."
Richard Stallman, head of the GNU organization, the creator of the Hurd, said "GNU is very pleased to be working with our brethren Microsoft on this venture. GNU and the FSF have always had great respect for Microsoft and Bill Gates, and we believe that the combination of their Office suite and the rock-solid (and complete) Hurd kernel will allow the end user to experience a vastly superior Windows."
Asked whether a name change may be on the horizon for the Windows line, Bill Gates thought for a second and replied: "Yes. Yes, I think there might. How does Gnudows sound?"
Microsoft shareholders could not be reached for comment.
that wasnt funny atall... im crying..
This is just plain cruel. CRUUUUUUUUUUEL!
One more crippling bombshell hit the already beleaguered *BSD community when IDC confirmed that *BSD market share has dropped yet again, now down to less than a fraction of 1 percent of all servers. Coming on the heels of a recent Netcraft survey which plainly states that *BSD has lost more market share, this news serves to reinforce what we've known all along. *BSD is collapsing in complete disarray, as fittingly exemplified by failing dead last in the recent Sys Admin comprehensive networking test.
You don't need to be a Kreskin to predict *BSD's future. The hand writing is on the wall: *BSD faces a bleak future. In fact there won't be any future at all for *BSD because *BSD is dying. Things are looking very bad for *BSD. As many of us are already aware, *BSD continues to lose market share. Red ink flows like a river of blood.
FreeBSD is the most endangered of them all, having lost 93% of its core developers. The sudden and unpleasant departures of long time FreeBSD developers Jordan Hubbard and Mike Smith only serve to underscore the point more clearly. There can no longer be any doubt: FreeBSD is dying.
Let's keep to the facts and look at the numbers.
OpenBSD leader Theo states that there are 7000 users of OpenBSD. How many users of NetBSD are there? Let's see. The number of OpenBSD versus NetBSD posts on Usenet is roughly in ratio of 5 to 1. Therefore there are about 7000/5 = 1400 NetBSD users. BSD/OS posts on Usenet are about half of the volume of NetBSD posts. Therefore there are about 700 users of BSD/OS. A recent article put FreeBSD at about 80 percent of the *BSD market. Therefore there are (7000+1400+700)*4 = 36400 FreeBSD users. This is consistent with the number of FreeBSD Usenet posts.
Due to the troubles of Walnut Creek, abysmal sales and so on, FreeBSD went out of business and was taken over by BSDI who sell another troubled OS. Now BSDI is also dead, its corpse turned over to yet another charnel house.
All major surveys show that *BSD has steadily declined in market share. *BSD is very sick and its long term survival prospects are very dim. If *BSD is to survive at all it will be among OS dilettante dabblers. *BSD continues to decay. Nothing short of a miracle could save it at this point in time. For all practical purposes, *BSD is dead.
Fact: *BSD is dying
Anybody else having problems with ./configure?
/usr/bin/install -c ... missing
checking for a BSD-compatible install...
checking whether build environment is sane... yes
checking whether make sets $(MAKE)... yes
checking for kernel32.dll
ERROR: kernel32.dll not found, cannot install E1.0
(Score:-1, Wrong)
Is that what enlightenment is supposed to look like, or is that part of the joke?
-jcr
The only title of honor that a tyrant can grant is "Enemy of the State."
Maybe you should go read Slashdot's "EuroSlash" site... oh wait, Slashdot doesn't have a European version.
Hmm, a US website that uses US date formatting. What's next, German websites written in German?
Duke Nukem Forever has gone gold!!!!
A preposition is a terrible thing to end a sentence with.
The link is broken. *sigh* Must be another case of slashdotting :(
In other news, Duke Nukem Forever actually released !
Hello.... Hello ???? Anyone ?
that is the sickest joke ever! i believed it for a few seconds and almost died of joy and surprise. then i entered the stage of doubt: how do they jump from 0.16.5 to 1.0? a few days ago didnt he say that had a ways to go? then i remembered...
its new years day!
> "I allege that SCO is full of it" -Linus
Only post about Duken Nukem Forever is missing.
Yeah.
Well, you can use the RH9 version of Enlightenment 1.0 on Gentoo now that Gentoo supports RPM. As long as the Free Software is not provided over a network that implements the 'Evil Bit'. God knows what MS thinks of Free Software. :)
So I guess this means no more point releases.
The Buddha, the Godhead, resides quite as comfortably in the circuits of a
digital computer or the gears of a cycle transmission as he does at the top
of a mountain or in the petals of a flower. To think otherwise is to demean
the Buddha -- which is to demean oneself.
-- Robert Pirsig, "Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance"
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