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User: screwballicus

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Comments · 338

  1. Re:"So don't accept... on The Web's Longest Disclaimer · · Score: 5, Funny

    donate my firstborn to their catering department.

    At least maybe then the food would be edible.

  2. Useless platform on Car Digital Assistant · · Score: 5, Funny

    Give me an integrated TI 99/4A in my car, so I can play Car Wars while driving. Looking simultaneously on the real world and Car Wars' virtual world, passengers will have to ask me: Which is the game and which the simulation?

  3. Re:Humanitarian aid on One Million AOL discs to be returned to AOL · · Score: 2

    Also, if you break off a 90-or-so degree piece of the CD, what remains is a section with a hole in the middle for your index finger and a sharp edge pointing outward from either side. Kind of what you'd get if Klingons engaged in thumb wars.

  4. Does gamergeek-speak translate to spoken words? on Xbox Live Beta Report · · Score: 2

    I'm just trying to imagine what gaming in a world where everyone can hear everyone else's voice would be like. Can anyone who has done this shed some insight?

    I mean, if people were to play EQ/DAOC/AC with universal voice communication, would a conversation still sound like this:

    Player1: Ding!
    Player2: Gratz
    Player3: Need to go afk a sec
    Player1: afk as well
    Player2: What was that sword drop?
    Player1: Back. Sword procs a DD and has a latent HoT.
    Player1: Back - Inc
    Player2: Add
    Player3: aggro!

    Somehow, I think if MMORPGers were plunged into a voice-communication MMORPG world, these written words would turn into spoken words and play delightful havoc with the language. But can anyone who's used this kind of service say if they do?

  5. Art on Passenger Profiling: CAPPS II · · Score: 2

    One place this will really become a hindrance, I believe, is in the movement of artists. As a Canadian, I've gotten used to disappointment where concerts/shows are concerned. Any given indy band, be it hip-hop or punk, seems to have around a 50/50 chance of getting over the border to Canada. My ex-boyfriend was a harpsichordist. He used to go down to the states to perform a fair amount. Now, just getting over the border with a harpsichord in his vehicle becomes so logistically impossible that he's unable to attempt it anymore. And that's a shame.

    What's true of copyright lawsuits is true of "security precautions" such as this: if there's a large enough possibility of financial and personal inconvenience as a result of a perfectly legal action, for most of us, it's not worth even taking the risk of fighting it. If, for example, my Lebanese, Arab-in-appearance, American citizen aunt is threatened with strip-searching on every flight she takes (which is, as proven by her experience, absolutely the case), she's just going to avoid flying at all cost (which she does).

  6. Relationships in Dark Age of Camelot on The Warriors Stood in the Shape of a Heart · · Score: 2

    The ties that /bind, in Dark Age of Camelot, do not restrict themselves to the interpersonal. Read this story of a summoned Cabalist pet, loved by many, who a realm chose to /follow and /bow down to til death by his master's hand tore him away from them:

    http://vnboards.ign.com/message.asp?topic=353561 07 &replies=48

    For Steve!

    (people are strange)
    ________
    Yst - 50 Bard - Guinevere

  7. Dear god on Medicine for a Sick Linux Box · · Score: 5, Insightful

    I'd always thought, to a large extent, the frustration of dealing with Windows and Mac had been due to their perverse propensity for the use of abstract metaphors which complicate rather than explicate problems. That may be helpful for new users, but new users Linux users do not tend to be. Do Linux users want to be treated like babies all of a sudden? I know I certainly don't. And, somehow, I don't believe the linux community in general is going to be too impressed with useful utility encased in meaningless, obfuscating metaphors.

  8. Re:hmmm.... on Benchmark Program Rewritten to Favor Intel? · · Score: 2


    does it means that sysmark`s benchmarks is to intel as arthur andersen`s audits were to enron?


    It otherwise might, but this possibility may be somewhat mitigated by the reality that being 'in bed with finance executives' registers as just slightly less repugnant than the prospect of being 'in bed with benchmark coders.'

  9. Re:I Agree on Speech For The Deaf · · Score: 2

    Besides, there is no reason to suppose that new signs cannot be designed specifcically for this glove so that it can be used to say anything

    But what would be the point of that? Sure, you could construct a new protocol, which must be learned, for translating hand movements to speech, but, as many other readers have pointed out, that would be a keyboard. In fact, it would be worse than a keyboard. With a keyboard, you know the language and only need to learn the input method. In this case, you not only have to learn the input method, you also have to learn the language (or the device's strange corruption of it).

    If it can't understand idiosyncratic speech, it cannot understand speech at all. If the fact that this device can translate a preprogrammed static set of ASL into speech constitutes a breakthrough, then we should all rejoice that real-time universal translators exist. As long as we all speak in boolean expressions with a static vocabulary, universal translation is easy, whether in spoken language or sign language.

    But if I'm handed a translation device and told I'm going to have to learn its language before I can use it, I'm going to raise my eyebrow quizically.

  10. Re: Ignorance is beaming on Haiku vs Spam · · Score: 5, Funny

    Hank: So, are you Chinese or Japanese?
    Kahn: I live in California last twenty years, but, uh, first couple, Laos.
    Hank: Huh?
    Kahn: Laos. We Laotian.
    Bill: The ocean? What ocean?
    Kahn: We are Laotian. From Laos, stupid! It's a landlocked country in Southeast Asia. It's between Vietnam and Thailand, okay?? Population: four point seven million.
    Hank: So... are you Chinese or Japanese?

  11. Re:he is a C hacker, that's it on The Technology Behind ID's Games · · Score: 2

    Just as rough (though zooming forward quite a ways in history): Playing Quake on PocketPCs:

    http://quake.pocketmatrix.com/

    On my Casio EM-500, I had 16MB of RAM in which to store the program, store my maps AND run the game. The scary thing is, that was enough. You couldn't play it on the faster StrongARM IPAQs, as the IPAQ engineers (who should all be subject to mass execution) saw fit not to support the detection of multiple button presses. However, on the little MIPS Casio chip, with its proper gamepad and buttons, it ran just fine. A game which still looks modern and can be stored and run in a total of 16MB of storage. Magic.

  12. Rest easy, humanity. on Men vs. Machines · · Score: 2

    This threat to the supremacy of mankind will soon be quelled when we uncover the talented chess-playing midget secretly hidden inside Deep Fritz's supposed workings.

  13. Re:Ever heard of eye strain? on Iowa College Goes Paperless · · Score: 2

    I can't imagine having to do all of my research and and read all of my class texts on a monitor.

    As a poli sci/english student, I've done this and loved it. Last year, I was able to read Plato's Republic, Aristotle's The Politics and a couple of Locke's works without spending a dime, thanks to the e-texts. Of course, they're not necessarily the 'approved' versions, but you can typically get around this. At roughly TWELVE books per english course, with five courses next year, I think Project Gutenberg's going to be my best friend. An additional benefit of Project Gutenberg is that I can do my reading for class during all those hours I do nothing at work right off my monitor.

  14. Re:Smell on Tactile the Future of GUI? · · Score: 2

    Some exciting, bleeding edge, next generation games already bring this advancement in scratch n sniff technology to you.

  15. Re:Infocom games on What (And Where) Are The Classic Free Games? · · Score: 2

    Or you could always do what I did and just buy the Infocom Masterpieces for a canonical collection.

  16. Re:Karma-dropping on All We Want Is Whatever's On Your Machine · · Score: 0, Offtopic

    Agreed. I'm inclined to just automatically moderate down any posts that pull that goofy over-dramatic martyrdom stunt. It's more tired than the "beowulf cluster of..." and goatse references at this point. And I cannot believe anyone is dumb enough to fall for it. But, seemingly, they do.

    By the way, I see you got moderated down. This is why you should most certainly have begun your post with 'time to get rid of some of that excess karma.' This would result in, by contrast, being moderated up by the trained-monkey-moderators we find here in their natural habitat.

  17. DOS on Ricardo Montalban Recalls Khan · · Score: 1, Offtopic

    echo off
    if %1==thepot goto thepot else goto end :thepot
    set black=thekettle
    call thekettle %black%
    if not errorlevel 1 set you=hypocrite
    echo %you% :end

  18. Re:The Decline of Star Trek on Ricardo Montalban Recalls Khan · · Score: 1

    You may exist on a plain high above all the plebian swine who don't get 1600 on their SAT scores (I'm not even sure what '1600' implies as I'm not American) but you sure don't seem to know what 'dredge' means. A 'dredge' is, in my experience, a barge for clearing earth or sand from banks and shoals to allow boats to dock or pass. So I'm assuming that's not what you're talking about.

    You were probably thinking of the word 'dreck' which is something media critics who get 1600 on their SAT scores use to refer to phenomena to the interest in which they have become immunised as a result of their hopeless transcendence over the tastes of the filthy, uncouth masses.

  19. Good selection of utterly pointless domains on Boulevard of Broken .dreams · · Score: 2

    Portal of Evil has a great selection of totally arbitrary and utterly silly domain names at which you can get email addresses

    Favourites include

    Chlamydia-is-not-a-flower.com

    IAmOffended.com

    IFuckedSteveJobs.com

    and

    Bottomless-Abyss-Of-Suckitude.com

    I, myself, chose an address at YouEatPoopy.com.

  20. Re:The ultimate nerd pornography: on Computers That Thrive in Salty, Humid Environments? · · Score: 2

    Computer bukkake!

    That'd certainly be a way to test your computer in the above-cited type of salty environment.

  21. Re:Legitimate reasons for changing the IMEI? on Hack Your Phone, Go to Jail · · Score: 2

    So STFU about your damn rights being impinged on, jesus.

    Did you just tell Jesus to Shut The Fuck Up?

    *runs away crying*

  22. Re:Sheya, right, as if on India's ISPs Want Payola from Big Portals · · Score: 5, Informative


    I know there are a lot of programmers in India and stuff, but do they really thing Yahoo and MSN will care?


    Ahem.

    India
    1 peninsula region (often called a subcontinent) S Asia S of the Himalayas between Bay of Bengal & Arabian Sea occupied by India, Pakistan, & Bangladesh & formerly often considered as also including Burma (but not Ceylon)
    2 those parts of India until 1947 under British rule or protection together with Baluchistan & the Andaman & Nicobar islands &, prior to 1937, Burma
    3 country comprising major portion of peninsula; a republic within the Commonwealth of Nations; until 1947 a part of the British Empire capital New Delhi area 1,195,063 square miles (3,095,472 square kilometers), population 896,567,000
    [M-W.COM]

    Enough said.

  23. Advertising beamed into our heads? on Voices in Your Head · · Score: 2

    This will no doubt comprise the superliminal branch of their three-pronged attack.

  24. Unfortunately on More PlayStation 3 Grid Computing Details · · Score: 3, Informative

    There's no point in pretending to argue against any of this because it doesn't say anything.

    This is like being presented with the statement 'in ten years, men will fly like birds!'

    You just can't say it's not true because it doesn't particularly carry any meaning in the first place.

  25. Swedish Chef? Nah. You got it wrong on Norwegian Government Expires Microsoft Contract · · Score: 2

    And now analysis from Canadian Prime Minister Jean Chretien:

    dey got de lyingMonopoly outta de gobernmint, now if dey cud only get de lye outta de fish.