---- Original Message ---- Date: Thu, 27 Jun 2002 08:36 -0500 (CDT) From: "Fieldus, Trevor" To: Guy Pence,
John Hintzen,
Juliane Smith,
Leonard Piazza,
Michele Francis-Stine,
Susanne Harland Importance: high Subject: IMPORTANT: Ron Beaumont call
Team,
Ron Beaumont has just held an EMEA all hands conference bridge to update us on the current situation. Below are the highlight bullets from what he had to say:
WHAT HAPPENED * he confirmed that a routine internal audit found the line cost error in the financial statements. This was reported to KPMG and Scott Sullivan/David Myers prepared a statement of why they did this over the weekend * KPMG heard the explanation and determined that it was against standard accounting principles and that a restatement of our financial statement should be made * The board were aware of this last Thursday and have worked quickly to understand the issues and co-operate with KPMG * The impact is to restate our costs and recalculate our profit. However, our cash position is the more important than our profit levels and we have a good cash position currently. WHERE DO WE GO FROM HERE * In terms of the 17,000 lay-off on Friday, he broke this out as follows (and yes I know that when you add the numbers up they come to more than 17,000): * c. 2000 will be contractors * c. 3000 will be attrition (resignations and leavers since January 1st 2002) * c. 5000 will be leaving as part of our discontinued business and operations (eg. Wireless Resale) * c. 3000 will be from our consumer business (back office & customer service in residential and long distance areas) * c. 5-6000 will be from our business groups > * We will sell assets to reclaim further cash for the company: * real estate in DC, Pentagon City & Virginia will raise c. $200m cash * We will discontinue or sell some of our other operations: * NOT selling any networks or operations in Europe or Asia (except for potentially the Intel network in Japan) * WILL sell/discontinue Wireless Resale and foreign properties (eg. Embretel, MMDS, MKI etc) * The board are also spending time with the banks and lenders to continue discussions on lines of credit. The banks are supportive but are likely to want more difficult terms than previously on the table. * WCOM does not currently have sufficient cash to pay off all our debts. We do have enough to get us through to the end of 2003. We need to grow our cash flow by an incremental year on year figure of US$200m to ensure we can cover our debts going forward beyond 2003 * NASDAQ has ceased trading WCOM stock. They can only trade stock on companies that have audited financial statements. Our stock will not be traded until KPMG have reviewed, audited and released our revised financial statements. Expulsion from the NASDAQ probably cannot take place (nor can the clock start ticking on their rules for expulsion) until we are trading again * Chapter 11 is not yet an option. Bankruptcy in Europe is different. Here it means closing the company, selling the assets. Chapter 11 would remove our debts, but allow the company to continue trading under different ownership WHAT CAN WE DO * Focus on our customers. Communicate with them and build their confidence with us by our actions not words * Ensure we continue to deliver services at the highest level of competence and quality * Work as a team. help each other out by discussing the problems and supporting each other in these difficult times
Apologies for the over long email, but thought you'd like to know what Ron has said. The call was recorded and lasted about 20 mins. As soon as I get a email with the replay access number, I'll email it out so that we can all hear the words first hand. Take care,
Trevor Fieldus Senior Program Manager Global Enhanced Services
I eat delivery all the time at least three nights a week. I like the variety of food, Chinese, Italian, Spanish and so on. I have a crush on about four guys from different places. Pizza on Mondays means I get to look at Tony the owners son when he delivers. Tony is like a big kid, piercing brown eyes and hard firm muscles. Chinese food means Johnny, dark black hair and a nice tight ass. Thursday means spice day and Manuel delivers that when I get my hot Spanish dishes. I have always flirted with the three of them and we all have a friendly relationship. Out of the three of them Manuel was by far the sexiest, he had dark black hair and beautiful brown eyes and the cutest smile I have ever seen.
Last Thursday Manuel came to the door and as usual I invited him in, he usually refused saying he had to get back to work. This night I happened to be his last delivery and he did not have to go back to work. He came in and we immediately knew that we were attracted to each other. Our eyes locked and we began kissing and foundling each others manhood's. We stripped down and kissed passionately, Manuel had the softest thickest tongue I ever had in my mouth. I decided to make the big move first and pulled this Spanish hunks big cock into my mouth. I sucked and licked his beautiful sweaty balls. I pushed him on to the floor and mouth massaged his burning thick manhood. Manuel exploded his spicy load into my mouth and I sucked him dry. He returned the favor by placing his manly lips around my meat and power sucking.
Manuel sucked and sucked my hot rod but I was holding out for the prize, he must have licked and sucked my cock and balls for over thirty pleasure filled minutes. I was not going to shoot off in this studs mouth, I wanted the backdoor prize and was going to get it. I pulled my cock out of his mouth and roughly slapped it across his face, I told him if he wanted his tip he would have to give me the goods. Manuel turned around and spread his tight meaty ass wide open. His golden brown love hole was glistening with wet juice and he was begging for relief. I decided I wanted to taste that sweet looking round cake and shoved my tongue way up inside, Manuel screamed with pleasure, I licked his sugar walls. By Manuel was begging for packing, he wanted exactly what I needed. I got behind him and mounted my attack, quickly shoving my tool inside his tight wet ass. After about three pumps I was not able to hold back, we both screamed as I shot my hot load up his sweet brown ass.
Or maybe he was a sadomasochist? Into bestiality? A necrophile? Seeing as I haven't fucked or been fucked by Jesus yet, I really can't say what his sexual orientation is/was.
Unless he has fucked you or you have fucked him, you don't know any better than me.
All of which brings up an interesting question: why do so many Christians feel so strongly that their god must have been heterosexual? I doubt that very many have had any firsthand sexual experiences with the Son of Man on which to base their convictions, so why are they all so certain?
My guess is that its for the same reason as so many of them assume that their lord was white, able-bodied, relatively good-looking (certainly not fat). For the same reason that they assume he wanted to start a religion, that he would have voted Republican and opposed abortion today. Its like a New Right entrepeneur said a few years ago - "If Jesus came back today he would be an ad salesman"!
These assumptions tell us very little about Jesus of Galilee, but they do tell us an awful lot about the values of contemporary Christians. Incapable of seeing beyond their own historical context, they project their ideals onto their guru back two-thousand years, just as they project their fears into their vision of the Hell where all of the rest of us are supposed to end up.
Yet those who would resusitate the dying body of the Church by winning it away from the powers and principalities who have controlled it for two millenia can take heart in the fact that there are some Jesus-worshipping organizations trying to promote a less heterosexually-blinkered image of their God.
One night last week the Lord woke me up in the middle of the night (that's getting to be a habit ) and as I was praying, the Lord showed me the walls of Jerusalem that were torn down . . . the gates of the city which had been trampled upon by their enemies . . . the scattering of the peoples of Jerusalem. He showed me a glimpse of the heart of Nehemiah who loved Jerusalem and whose heart was burdened for reconstruction.
Then the Lord showed me His Church . . . the walls have been broken down by her enemies, she has been trampled upon and beaten down and lays in ruins by the hand of her enemies . . . her inhabitants have been scattered. He showed me that in these last days He is raising up a company of Nehemiahs who would take the task to heart to rebuild the Church, to reconstruct the walls of the City of God, to set a watchman at each gate, to establish companies of worshippers to do service before Him during all watches.
He showed me that the materials and equipment needed for reconstruction have been released into our hands through intercession, fasting, separation, and consecration. He showed me that the Ark of His Presence would soon find a dwelling place in the midst of His Church, in the midst of the reconstructed City of God! That the latter house would indeed be more glorious than the former!
He showed me that He has raised up people who would accept the task of being gatekeepers, guarding each gate, hindering the enemy's attempts to enter and destroy. He is sending forth companies of scouts to search throughout the land for those who have been scattered and to escort them back within the gates of the Church, the City of God's Holy Dwelling!
The time is now for restoration, rebuilding, and strengthening the walls of the Church; there is a mighty move of God throughout the earth to prepare for Him a dwelling place in the midst of His People! Intercessors have been sent forth and commissioned to clean up the ruins and to set the City in order, redeeming that which has been destroyed by the hands of the enemy.
The call to intercession is a Nehemiah calling; those with a heart for restoration and rebuilding have been called to intercession as God is seeking a habitation among His people. He will not inhabit a City whose walls have been crushed and lay in ruin, but His dwellingplace will be seen in the midst of restoration and reconstruction.
In these last days, we are all challenged to be Nehemiah's . . . busy working to restore the Body of Christ (the Church), reclaiming it from the ruin brought about by the works of the enemy. We are called to unity and to call those back who have been scattered. We have been called to intercession, through groanings and birthings in the spirit through prayer.
I pray that we will all be sensitive to and answer the call!
Blessings,
an Ross jross@focusontheword.com Homepage: http://focusontheword.com
"No weapon that is formed against thee shall prosper; and every tongue that shall rise against thee in judgment thou shalt condemn. This is the heritage of the servants of the LORD, and their righteousness is of me, saith the LORD. (Isaiah 54:17)
UH most trolls dont have sigs and if trolls automatically post at -1 then they arent too worried about karma. and if we support slashdot then why are we crap flooding and page widening. you sir are fucking retarded.
1 "Love one another" it has been said is the supreme law, but what power made it so? Upon what rational authority does the gospel of love rest? Why should I not hate mine enemies-if I "love" them does that not place me at their mercy? 2 Is it natural for enemies to do good unto each other-and WHAT IS GOOD? 3 Can the torn and bloody victim "love" the blood-splashed jaws that rend him limb from limb? 4 Are we not all predatory animals by instinct? If humans ceased wholly from preying upon each other, could they continue to exist? 5 Is not "lust and carnal desire" a more truthful term to describe "love" when applied to the continuance of the race? Is not the "love" of the fawning scriptures simply a euphemism for sexual activity, or was the "great teacher" a glorifier of eunuchs? 6 Love your enemies and do good to them that hate and use you-is this not the despicable philosophy of the spaniel that rolls upon its back when kicked?
7 Hate your enemies with a whole heart, and if a man smite you on one cheek, SMASH him on the other!; smite him hip and thigh, for self-preservation is the highest law! 8 He who turns the other cheek is a cowardly dog! 9 Give blow for blow, scorn for scorn, doom for doom-with compound interest liberally added thereunto! Eye for eye, tooth for tooth, aye four-fold, a hundred-fold! Make yourself a Terror to your adversary, and when he goeth his way, he will possess much additional wisdom to ruminate over. Thus shall you make yourself respected in all the walks of life, and your spirit-your immortal spirit-shall live, not in an intangible paradise, but in the brains and sinews of those whose respect you have gained
1 Behold the crucifix; what does it symbolize? Pallid in-competence hanging on a tree. 2 I question all things. As I stand before the festering and varnished facades of your haughtiest moral dogmas, I write thereon in letters of blazing scorn: Lo and behold; all this is fraud! 3 Gather around me, Oh! ye death-defiant, and the earth itself shall be thine, to have and to hold! 4 Too long the dead hand has been permitted to sterilize living thought! 5 Too long right and wrong, good and evil have been inverted by false prophets! 6 No creed must be accepted upon authority of a "divine" nature. Religions must be put to the question. No moral dogma must be taken for granted-no standard of measurement deified. There is nothing inherently sacred about moral codes. Like the wooden idols of long ago, they are the work of human hands, and what man has made, man can destroy! 7 He that is slow to believe anything and everything is of great understanding, for belief in one false principle is the beginning of all unwisdom. 8 The chief duty of every new age is to upraise new men to determine its liberties, to lead it towards material suc-cess-to tend the rusty padlocks and chains of dead custom that always prevent healthy expansion. Theories and ideas that may have meant life and hope and freedom for our ancestors may now mean destruction, slavery, and dishonor to us! 9 As environments change, no human ideal standeth sure! 10 Whenever, therefore, a lie has built unto itself a throne, let it be assailed without pity and without regret, for under the domination of an inconvenient falsehood, no one can prosper. 11 Let established sophisms be dethroned, rooted out, burnt and destroyed, for they are a standing menace to all true nobility of thought and action! 12 Whatever alleged "truth" is proven by results to be but an empty fiction, let it be unceremoniously flung into the outer darkness, among the dead gods, dead empires, dead philosophies, and other useless lumber and wreckage! 13 The most dangerous of all enthroned lies is the holy, the sanctified, the privileged lie -the lie everyone believes to be a model truth. It is the fruitful mother of all other popular errors and delusions. It is a hydra-headed tree of unreason with a thousand roots. It is a social cancer! 14 The lie that is known to be a lie is half eradicated, but the lie that even intelligent persons accept as fact-the lie that has been inculcated in a little child at its mother's knee is more dangerous to contend against than a creeping pestilence! 15 Popular lies have ever been the most potent enemies of personal liberty. There is only one way to deal with them: Cut them out, to the very core, just as cancers. Extermi-nate them root and branch. Annihilate them, or they will us!
THE
BOOK OF
SATAN
I
1 In this arid wilderness of Steel and stone I raise up my voice that you may hear. To the East and to the West I beckon. To the North and to the South I show a sign proclaiming: Death to the weakling, wealth to the strong!
2 Open your eyes that you may see, Oh men of mildewed minds, and listen to me ye bewildered millions!
3 For I stand forth to challenge the wisdom of the world; to interrogate the "laws" of man and of "God"!
4 I request reasons for your golden rule and ask the why and wherefore of your ten commands.
5 Before none of your printed idols do I bend in acquiescence, and he who saith "thou shalt" to me is my mortal foe!
6 I dip my forefinger in the watery blood of your impotent mad redeemer, and write over his thorn-torn brow: The TRUE prince of evil-the king of the slaves!
7 No hoary falsehood shall be a truth to me; no stifling dogma shall encramp my pen!
S I break away from all conventions that do not lead to my earthly success and happiness.
9 I raise up in stern invasion the standard of the strong!
10 I gaze into the glassy eye of your fearsome Jehovah, and pluck him by the beard; I uplift a broad-axe, and split open his worm-eaten skull!
11 I blast out the ghastly contents of philosophically whited sepulchers and laugh with sardonic wrath!
1 Satan represents indulgence, instead of abstinence!
2 Satan represents vital existence, instead of spiritual pipe dreams!
3 Satan represents undefiled wisdom, instead of hypocritical self-deceit!
4 Satan represents kindness to those who deserve it, instead of love wasted on ingrates!
5 Satan represents vengeance, instead of turning the other cheek!
6 Satan represents responsibility to the responsible, instead of concern for psychic vampires!
7 Satan represents man as just another animal, sometimes better, more often worse than those that walk on all
fours, who, because of his "divine spiritual and intellectual development," has become the most vicious animal
of all!
8 Satan represents all of the so-called sins, as they all lead to physical, mental, or emotional gratification!
9 Satan has been the best friend the church has ever had, as he has kept it in business all these years!
Jon Katz and timothy enlisted the help of a 23-year-old woman who agreed to help the domestic partners have a baby through in vitro fertilization.
''Raising children is the most important thing you can do,'' timothy said.
Katz and timothy said they want to keep the surrogate mother's identity secret. They said they fear stress from publicity might hurt her, the quadruplets, or her own three children, who include twin toddlers.
Growing Generations, a California company that works with gays and surrogate mothers, says there have been triplet births among the company's 200 clients, but no quadruplets.
Shirley Zager, director of the Illinois-based Organization of Parents through Surrogacy, said that to her knowledge, no quadruplets have been born to a surrogate and a gay man through in vitro fertilization.
The surrogate did authorize a spokeswoman for Central Baptist Hospital to confirm that she was pregnant with quadruplets conceived through in vitro fertilization.
Katz and timothy said they're concerned that publicity will somehow interfere with their plans to become the best possible parents.
They said they know many people don't think gay men and lesbians should raise children. They also don't want their children to become the center of media attention.
Pursuing fatherhood
timothy and Katz met in California in 1998. By 2000, they were busy building a news website(slashdot.org), but their home seemed empty, and they decided to pursue fatherhood.
Last fall, a 23-year-old woman came into the salon with three children.
Katz thought the children were adorable. He kidded the woman about taking them home. Then he heard her say she felt as if she had been given a calling: to become a surrogate mother.
She agreed to help timothy and Katz. Working through a San Francisco fertility clinic, she became pregnant in January.
The men said they are following California law in paying her only for medical and living expenses. Those costs run $1,000 each month.
"timothy will be 'Dad,' because he's the biological father," Katz said. "I'll be 'Jon.'"
timothy and Katz said the surrogate mother has told them she doesn't want to be involved in raising the children on a regular basis. But the men said they will always let her know how the babies are doing.
C H D-Lysergic acid diethylamide
/ 2 5 'I see the true importance of LSD
O==C--N in the possibility of providing
| \ material aid to meditation aimed at the
| C H mystical experience of a deeper,
|___ 2 5 comprehensive reality. Such a
/ \ use accords entirely with the essence
N-CH and working character of LSD as a
\\___/ 3 sacred drug.' Dr Albert Hofmann,
/ \ the discoverer of LSD. // \___ / '... LSD is best understood as a | || || powerful unspecific amplifier, or | || || catalyst, of mental processes, which
\\ / \ / facilitates the emergence of human
N pysche. ' Dr Stan Grof, Esalen Institute.
H
LSD is believed to be illegally manufactured in Northern Californian and, perhaps also, Holland. An underground lab was also busted in England in early 1991. LSD is cheap and widely available. The currently hip English name for acid is 'A'. There are many dosage forms available: pieces of paper or cardboard ('tabs' -- often with colour pictures printed on them), very small pills ('microdots') and transparent gelatin sheets ('windowpane'). The doses present in each unit are on average 75-125 micrograms (mcg) of very pure LSD. This is a quite a strong dose but about half the strength of the 1960s dose. This, and the greater public knowledge of the drug, is probably why bad trips are less common now than in the past.
The lowest psychedelic dose is 50 mcg -- ecommended for beginners.Doses below this level have a similar effect to cannabis or MDMA. The effects increase with dosage until about 400-500 mcgs where any more has no more effect. LSD cannot cause toxic poisoning but in this dosage range bad trips are practically certain. The effects last up to eight or twelve hours. LSD must be treated with respect. It can be a completely overwhelming experience. Nevertheless, contrary to popular belief acid will not turn normal people permanently insane. Since acid came back into fashion the media treatment of the subject has been appallingly inaccurate. In September 1989 a English football fan fell overboard a ferry to Sweden and was presumably drowned. It was reported that this had resulted from LSD use. He had died fifteen minutes after taking a tab. However, LSD takes about half an hour to an hour to have any effect and, therefore, is unlikely to have contributed to his death. What the media had paid less attention to was been drinking very heavily. 'Drunk drowns' is obviously an inferior headline to 'Trip To Hell'.
A list of semen cryopreservation facilities for transsexuals to use for long-term storage.
If you transition you will lose the ability to have children. Even if you change your mind and stop hormones, there may be irrecovable damage to your reproductive ability. If you're a childless MtF transsexual you might want to consider a sperm bank. If someday you make a life-long committment with another women, maybe you'll want children? Here is a list of cryopreservation facilites across the United States and Canada (listed by state in alphabetical order). FtM transsexuals may also want to contact these places. They may be able to cryopreserve ovaries too!
This information is only for informational purposes. Neither me nor any other person or entity is endorsing these organizations.
There may be typos. I rushed to get this information posted because I feel it's so important. Please let me know about any errors, If there's a typo I can tell you what the correct information is.
I hope this information is helpful for you. I wish I had it when I was desperately looking for it. Good luck!
2. Tea bag - As you are sitting on a girl's face, repeatedly dip your scrotum in and out of her mouth, similar to a tea bag in a cup of hot water. An old favorite.
3. Hot Lunch - While receiving head from a woman, you shit on her chest. (a.k.a. the Cleveland Steamer)
4. The Stranger - Sitting on your hand until it falls asleep and then jerking off, eliciting the feeling of a hand job from someone else.
5. Donkey Punch - Banging a girl doggy style and then moments before you cum, sticking your dick in her ass, and then punching her in the back of the head. This gives a tremendous sensation, but for it to work correctly, the girl must be knocked out so that her asshole tightens up.
6. Golden Shower - Any form of peeing on a girl. (aka: watersports)
7. Pearl Necklace - Well known. Whenever you cum on the neck/cleavage area of a girl, it takes on the look of beautiful jewelry.
8. Coyote - This occurs when you wake up in the room of a nasty skank and you know you've got to give her the slip. However, you realize that your arm is wrapped around her. Therefore, you must gnaw off your own arm to get out of this situation. Can be very painful.
9. Purple Mushroom - This occurs when a woman is giving you oral sex and you withdraw your penis in order to poke it back into her cheek. It should leave a lasting impression similar to a purple mushroom.
10. The Flying Camel - A personal favorite. As she is lying on her back and you are hammering her from your knees, you carefully balance yourself without using your arms to prop yourself up. You then to flap your arms and let out a long, shrieking howl. Strictly a class move.
11. Double Fishhook - From the doggy - style position, you hook your pinky fingers in her mouth and pull back to achieve deeper penetration.
12. The Ram - Again, you're attacking from behind, when you start ramming her head against the wall in a rhythmic motion. The force of the wall should allow for deeper penetration. Very handy for those lulls in penile sensitivity.
13. Dog in a Bathtub - This is the proper name for when you attempt to insert your nuts into a girl's ass. It is so named because it can be just as hard as keeping a dog in the tub while giving it a bath.
14. The Bronco - Back to reality with this classic. You start by going doggy style and then just when she is really enjoying it, you grab onto her tits as tightly as possible and yell another girl's name. This gives you the feeling of riding a bronco as she tries to buck you off.
15. Pink Glove - This frequently happens during sex when a girl is not wet enough. When you pull out to give her the money, the inside of her twat sticks to your hog. Thus, the pink glove.
16. The Fountain of You - While sitting on her face and having her eat your ass, jerk off like a madman. Build up as much pressure as possible before releasing, spewing like a venerable geyser all over her face, neck and tits. (Better in her bed)
17. New York Style Taco - Anytime when you are so drunk that when you go down on her, you puke on her box. Happy trails!
18. Dirty Sanchez - While banging a girl doggy style, quickly stick 2 fingers deep into her starfish, then reach around and wipe the residue on her upper lip, providing her a mustache.
19. Western Grip - When jerking off, turn your hand around, so that your thumb is facing towards you. It is the same grip that rodeo folks use; hence, western.
20. The Blumpkin - You need to find a real tramp to do this right. It involves having her suck you off while you're on the shitter.
21. The Bismark - Another one involving oral sex. Right before you are about to spew, pull out and shoot all over her face. Follow that with a punch and smear the blood and jism together.
22. Jelly Doughnut - A derivation of the Bismark. All you have to do is punch her in the nose while you are getting head.
23. Woody Woodpecker - While a chick is sucking on your balls, repeatedly tap the head of your cock on her forehead.
24. Tossing salad - Well known by now. A prison act where one person is forced to chow starfish with the help of whatever condiments are available, i.e. Jello, jism, etc
25. The Fish Eye - Working from behind, you shove your finger in her pooper. Thereupon, she turns around in a one - eyed winking motion to see what the hell you are doing.
26. Tuna Melt - You're down on a chick, lapping away, and you discover that it's her time of the month. By no means do you stop though. When the whale spews, tartar sauce with a hint of raspberry smothers your face.
27. The Fur Ball - You're chomping away at some mighty Zena who has a mane between her legs the size of Lionel Richie's afro, when a mammoth fur ball gets lodged in your throat. You punch her.
28. The Chili Dog - You take a dump on the girl's chest and then titty fuck her.
29. Gaylord Perry - Going to only one knuckle during an anal probe is for wimps. Make this famous knuckle - ball pitcher proud and use multiple digits on that virgin corn hole. A minimum of 2 knuckles required (either on one finger or on multiple).
30. The Rear Admiral - An absolute blast. When getting a chick from behind (with both partners standing), make sure you don't let her grab onto anything when she is bent over. Then, drive your hips into her backside so that the momentum pushes her forward. The goal is to push her into a wall or table, or have her trip and fall on her face. You attain the status of Admiral when you can push her around the room without crashing into anything and not using your hands to grab onto her hips.
31. Glass Bottom Boat - Putting saran wrap over the skank's face and taking a dump.
32. Ray Bans - Put your nuts over her eye sockets while getting head. You're can is on her forehead. Yes, it may be anatomically impossible, but it is definitely worth a try.
33. The Snowmobile - When plugging a girl while she's on all fours, reach around and sweep out her arms so she falls on her face.
34. The Dutch Oven - Also well known. Whenever you fart while humping, pull the covers over her head. Don't let her out until all movement ceases.
35. Smoking Pole - Self Explanatory. Don't use fire.
36. Rusty Trombone - Getting the reacharound while getting your salad tossed. Also known as milking the prostate.
37. Turkey Shoot - When you're coming, come on her face and let it drip off her chin so it looks like that red shit on the turkey's chin.
38. Stovepiping - Taking it in the Tush.
39. Rusty Anchor - After a healthy term of the Stovepiping, the recipient gets to enjoy a good fudgesicle.
40. Sandpiper - A stovepiping on the local beach, desert, or playground sandbox. Also known as the Sandblast.
41. Lucky Pierre - the middle man in a three way buttfuck. Also known as the french sandwich.
42. UPDATED!!!! NEW LISTINGS!!!! Divortex - A mystical place into which old friends are sucked when a married couple splits up.
43. Blump - To suck someone's dick while they are taking a dump.
44. Bustard - A very rude bus driver.
45. Cold Faithful - Blowing your visibly - steaming load outside in the winter - time, like when you get your cock sucked on a ski - lift.
46. Grand pappy smash - To beat your meat so hardcore that it starts to chafe and bleed.
47. Esplanade - To attempt an explanation while drunk.
48. Flatulence - The emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.
49. Butt Rodeo - When you're going at it with a girl, you flip her over real fast, start ramming her in the ass and yell as loud as possible "BUTT RODEO!" You then see how long you can ride her till she tosses ya off!
50. Bargoyle - The hideous old hair - spray hag who seems to live at your local watering hole. She usually smokes endlessly, spends hundreds of dollars a night on video - poker, and makes sexually threatening comments to frightened college freshmen.
51. Pasteurize - Once you get her hairy bush pasteurize, you got it licked!
52. Beerelevant - A point which does not seem to be particularly important, given enough beer
53. Mangry - Describing the anger of women who are angry at men, specifically. "She's such a bitch, she's just plain mangry."
54. Clitourist - A man who won't stop and ask for directions in bed. ie: "Because of his fouled foreplay, Suzy realized that her new boyfriend was no experienced bedroom traveler, but merely a clitourist."
55. Stuffucking - The act of "stuffing in" your limp, helpless member in hopes of getting it up. Potential causes: you're too drunk or she's too ugly. (see also; Fugly)
56. Antlers - Wide, flat, flapjack titties that come to a sharp point at the nipples.
57. The Zombie Mask While getting head from your favorite, unsuspecting, trash - barrel whore, tell her you want her to look right up at you with those "pretty little eyes" when you blow your load. Then, just when you're ready to spew a good weeks worth of goo, blast that hefty load in both eyes. This temporary state of blindness will produce the zombie effect as she stumbles around the room with arms outstretched, and moaning like the walking dead.
58. The Flaming Amazon - This one's for all you pyromaniacs out there. When you're screwing some chick, right when your about to cum, pull out and quickly grab the nearest lighter and set her pubes on fire, then extinguish the flames with your jizz!
59. The Screwnicorn - When a dyke puts her strap - on dildo on her forehead and proceeds to go at her partner like a crazed unicorn.
60. Split pissonality - When you're taking a leak and you get two streams out of the one hole!
61. A Short in the Cord - A "code" phrase used by the common man to refer to Testicular Tendon Tangle Syndrome. Ex. "Oh fuck! My nuts are killing me... I think I've got a short in the cord."
62. Old Jism Trail - The stream of semen oozing down the chin and chest of someone who has just finished fellating a senior citizen.
63. Abdicate - To give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
64. Lymph - To walk with a lisp.
65. Anal Boot - An anal boot is when you take a pitcher of beer, everyone spits in it, someone stirs it with their cock and then the mixture is poured through the crack of a man ass into the waiting mouth of the loser of a bet or drinking game.
66. Australian Death Grip - The act of grabbing a woman by the haunches/crotch and staring deeply into her eyes until you're slapped or kissed. A recommended tactic for very crowded bars. Another great opportunity for wagering among friends.
67. Fumilingus - When a man (or woman) performs cunnilingus on a woman and she farts directly in his/her face.
68. Intoxicourse - Having sexual intercourse whilst piss - drunk.
69. Valsalva - The act of pinching shut (with thumb and forefinger) a woman's nose while receiving fellatio; most effective when employed just prior to the release point due to the gag reflex and ensuing swallow that the woman is forced to do to continue breathing. A great first date ploy, as it sets the stage for what the rules of engagement will be going forward.
70. Insta - gasm - Pre - mature ejaculation at the sight of a beautiful woman. ie: "She was so fine, I had an insta - gasm before I could get her clothes off!"
71. Manual Deconstipation - This is where you get out the hand cream and go in manually for the hammerhead by breaking it into smaller chunks and pulling it out a piece at a time.
72. Post Poodum Syndrome - The feeling of depression felt after successful removal of a hammerhead. The excitement has passed, and you must now find something else to occupy your time.
73. The Homolic Maneuver - Using your penis to dislodge an object blocking a choking victim's windpipe.
74. The Houdini - Going at it doggy style until you are just about to come, then pull out and spit hard, but quietly, on her back so she thinks that you have come. When she turns around unleash a blast into her face and she is left shocked and amazed, wondering at what a great guy you are, and how you managed it.
75. The Angry Dragon - Immediately after you blow your load in a girl's mouth, smack the back of her head and make it come out her nose. When she gets up she'll look like an angry dragon. The harder you laugh, the angrier she'll look. Magic.
76. Cum Guzzling Sperim Burping Coke Drinking Bitch - The once in a lifetime act of blowing a hot steamy load down the back of a girl's throat and then proceeding to force a large cold bottle of Coke into her mouth. Shake her head vigorously back and forth to create the Cum Guzzling, Sperm Burping effect. A great way to impress any friends in the room.
77. Errol Flynn (Much Like Dirty Sanchez) - A time honoured event in which, while laying the bone doggy - style, you insert your finger into her asshole. You then pull it out and wipe it across her upper lip, leaving a thin shit moustache. At the same time pull her hair back from her forehead. This makes her look like Errol Flynn.
78. The Donkey Punch - Banging a girl doggy style and then moments before you cum, you stick your dick in her ass and then punch her hard in the back of the neck. The blow to the neck will make her arc her back and tense her arse muscles, which will constrict the penis and give you a tremendous orgasmic experience when you ejaculate.
It was a small miracle that the amber liquid from the shaking bottle found its way into Murdoc's glass--it was his fourth drink. Murdoc asked his pretty, young contact again why she couldn't find any work for his services. She responded with, "It's your reputation, Murdoc. The organization doesn't think your strong anymore."
Murdoc tried to contain his drunken rage and told her, "Listen to me, Carmen, you tell your keepers that I am still Murdoc, I never failed on a mission save one, and I am still the worst thing that can happen to your enemies!"
She put on her large red hat with its gold band to hide her features as she stood up and added, "You'd better take care of your obsession first. Murdoc used to mean fear, now it's just the name of some thug with a chequered past." Carmen tossed a fresh $100 bill into the table's pool of spilt alcohol and melted ice. As its dry crispness gave way to the overwhelming moisture she parted with the words, "Get help Murdoc. It hurts me to see you this way."
Two drinks latter Murdoc spirited the soggy money into his pocket. In a drunken haze he made his way home and started up his dark room. There was just one more roll of film that he needed to develop. It was of MacGyver. When he selected his favorite he blew it up and placed it on his wall.
It was his wall of MacGyver--because the name ANGUS MACGYVER was written in large day glow letters above hundreds of other photos taken of Murdoc's only failure.
Smoke. MacGyver smelt smoke before he opened his eyes. The natural instinct to panic killed any of the sweet caress that the sandman brought him. Even before his eyes opened he pondered the possibility of waking up with the house on fire ran wild in his fear infested mind. This was a houseboat--how could it have caught fire? In the moment before he prepared to abandon his home Mac's overactive head for mechanics tried to figure out how his home could come to such a fate. He did not smoke, have an electric heater on, or leave anything on the stove. The stove--it had to be the stove, because of eggs. Mac's keen nose picked the mild scent of burning eggs within the smoke.
The blond beauty sat up instantly--eyes open, blankets flying and a single name on his lips, "Penny!"
There was a cobweb of light yet pungent gray smoke throughout MacGyver's home and in the far corner of the sad scene of chaos was the charmingly hopeless Penny Parker. She was covered in fine white flour and juggling gobs of eggs and shells off her hands into a smoking fry pan.
She wrestled with breakfast in an outfit that someone in the first grade might wear. It was a jumper in a smart green plaid, matching yellow hose and a cream colored blouse. Her shiny patent leather Mary Jane's were hanging on the hooks meant for the oven mitts. Mac had to get her out of his home or be subject to these kind of surprises forever.
Murdoc balanced the weapon on his shoulder as the unshaven dealer praised its features and abilities. As he popped open the eyepiece Murdoc was careful to point the rocket launcher out the window. If this weapon had gone off in this run down Compton crack house the blast might shift the mess from an eyesore to a blaze.
While Murdoc imagined the children playing down the street in the scope as MacGyver, the crusty gun runner added, "I can see this is you! But ya need something for close range, just in case the cops come from behind!" The pile that the runner searched through created a mild dust cloud that fell to the floor when he produced a large bowie knife.
Murdoc who was still looking through the scope was in his own world. The dealer began to praise the blade and compare it to the ones used by the latest movie action heroes. Murdoc with his hand stroking the length of the rocket launcher bluntly interrupted the sales pitch by asking, "Don't you sell flat unmarked hand guns?" Once again the runner rifled though his pile of guns. Murdoc now fixed his gaze on the dealer. The gun runner pulled out an old black gun and swore to Murdoc, "The last person to fire this gun is probably long dead." Murdoc raised an eyebrow while confirming his satisfaction with an evil grin. His expression turned to one of shock when the dealer named his price.
My Quick Bio Name: Tom Martin Location: Niagara Falls, ON Hair Color: Brown Eye Color: Brown Height: 6'3 Weight: 250lbs AIM (AOL Instant Messanger) Nick: BigTBearUSA Info About Me I'm a 22 year old goateed bear currently living in Niagara Falls, Ontario (or as others call it the honeymoon capital of the world) which I can see because it is really romantic here.
I only have one problem tho, since I am single, I have no one to do all those romantic things with:o( Wish I had a big guy for a BF, so if anyone of you big bellied guys that are interested in a LTR (Long Term Relationship) and are reading this and you like what you see please email me:o)
Anyways, I'm into Music (R&B, Hip-Hop, Dance, Rap and some Rock and even a little Country) pretty wierd combination huh? For Sports, I'm really into Football and just some Baseball and Basketball, but Football tops the list, I like playing it along with watching it. My favorite football teams are the Green Bay Packers, Buffalo Bills and New England Patriots mostly because I really like some of the guys on those teams, especially Green Bay. Other things I am into are Travelling, Computers, Wrestling, a little Photography and Cooking.
Sexually, I'm really into cuddling, especially cuddling up with a big bellied guy that is around my age (19 to 34 in that area). I love cuddling up to his big belly and laying my head on his chest just hearing his heartbeat (I could do that for hours on end). Other things that I like are lots of touching, giving and receiving massages, kissing and of course hugging. All done with that young, big bellied man.
I am looking for guys who like pretty much the same things that I like and that are open and honest and who are not afraid to show their feelings. I am all of the above except for the fact that I am really shy especially in person. I would like a guy who could help me out from my shell (as they say)
I graduated from Niagara College taking a 3 year Tourism program, which I graduated in April of 2000. Now after I can save up enough money I plan on moving to the United States somewhere either in New England or the Southwest. One thing I really like about the United States (especially big cities) are all the buildings, just the way some of them are designed kind of like that old archectural style (If you don't understand, its kinda hard to explain hehe), another thing is all the hot guys that are in the US:O) Some really cute guys too.
Anyways, there is some information about me. If you would like to know more you can email me or sign my guestbook by clicking on the links near the bottom of this page or if you see me online just drop me a message and say hi (Especially all you big bellied cute bears)
Slashdot Mirror
13 lbs isnt a lot you skinny nerd...go outside and do something sometime and build muscle instead of pasty white skin
---- Original Message ---- , , , , ,
Date: Thu, 27 Jun 2002 08:36 -0500 (CDT)
From: "Fieldus, Trevor"
To: Guy Pence
John Hintzen
Juliane Smith
Leonard Piazza
Michele Francis-Stine
Susanne Harland
Importance: high
Subject: IMPORTANT: Ron Beaumont call
Team,
Ron Beaumont has just held an EMEA all hands conference bridge to update us
on the current situation. Below are the highlight bullets from what he had
to say:
WHAT HAPPENED
* he confirmed that a routine internal audit found the line cost error in
the financial statements. This was reported to KPMG and Scott Sullivan/David
Myers prepared a statement of why they did this over the weekend
* KPMG heard the explanation and determined that it was against standard
accounting principles and that a restatement of our financial statement
should be made
* The board were aware of this last Thursday and have worked quickly to
understand the issues and co-operate with KPMG
* The impact is to restate our costs and recalculate our profit.
However, our cash position is the more important than our profit levels and
we have a good cash position currently.
WHERE DO WE GO FROM HERE
* In terms of the 17,000 lay-off on Friday, he broke this out as follows
(and yes I know that when you add the numbers up they come to more than
17,000):
* c. 2000 will be contractors
* c. 3000 will be attrition (resignations and leavers since January 1st
2002)
* c. 5000 will be leaving as part of our discontinued business and
operations (eg. Wireless Resale)
* c. 3000 will be from our consumer business (back office & customer service
in residential and long distance areas)
* c. 5-6000 will be from our business groups >
* We will sell assets to reclaim further cash for the company:
* real estate in DC, Pentagon City & Virginia will raise c. $200m cash
* We will discontinue or sell some of our other operations:
* NOT selling any networks or operations in Europe or Asia (except for
potentially the Intel network in Japan)
* WILL sell/discontinue Wireless Resale and foreign properties (eg.
Embretel, MMDS, MKI etc)
* The board are also spending time with the banks and lenders to continue
discussions on lines of credit. The banks are supportive but are likely to
want more difficult terms than previously on the table.
* WCOM does not currently have sufficient cash to pay off all our debts. We
do have enough to get us through to the end of 2003. We need to grow our
cash flow by an incremental year on year figure of US$200m to ensure we can
cover our debts going forward beyond 2003
* NASDAQ has ceased trading WCOM stock. They can only trade stock on
companies that have audited financial statements. Our stock will not be
traded until KPMG have reviewed, audited and released our revised financial
statements. Expulsion from the NASDAQ probably cannot take place (nor can
the clock start ticking on their rules for expulsion) until we are trading
again
* Chapter 11 is not yet an option. Bankruptcy in Europe is different.
Here it means closing the company, selling the assets. Chapter 11 would
remove our debts, but allow the company to continue trading under different
ownership
WHAT CAN WE DO
* Focus on our customers. Communicate with them and build their confidence
with us by our actions not words
* Ensure we continue to deliver services at the highest level of competence
and quality
* Work as a team. help each other out by discussing the problems and
supporting each other in these difficult times
Apologies for the over long email, but thought you'd like to know what Ron
has said. The call was recorded and lasted about 20 mins. As soon as I get a
email with the replay access number, I'll email it out so that we can all
hear the words first hand.
Take care,
Trevor Fieldus
Senior Program Manager
Global Enhanced Services
DELIVERY SEX
I eat delivery all the time at least three nights a week. I like the variety of food, Chinese, Italian, Spanish and so on. I have a crush on about four guys from different places. Pizza on Mondays means I get to look at Tony the owners son when he delivers. Tony is like a big kid, piercing brown eyes and hard firm muscles. Chinese food means Johnny, dark black hair and a nice tight ass. Thursday means spice day and Manuel delivers that when I get my hot Spanish dishes. I have always flirted with the three of them and we all have a friendly relationship. Out of the three of them Manuel was by far the sexiest, he had dark black hair and beautiful brown eyes and the cutest smile I have ever seen.
Last Thursday Manuel came to the door and as usual I invited him in, he usually refused saying he had to get back to work. This night I happened to be his last delivery and he did not have to go back to work. He came in and we immediately knew that we were attracted to each other. Our eyes locked and we began kissing and foundling each others manhood's. We stripped down and kissed passionately, Manuel had the softest thickest tongue I ever had in my mouth. I decided to make the big move first and pulled this Spanish hunks big cock into my mouth. I sucked and licked his beautiful sweaty balls. I pushed him on to the floor and mouth massaged his burning thick manhood. Manuel exploded his spicy load into my mouth and I sucked him dry. He returned the favor by placing his manly lips around my meat and power sucking.
Manuel sucked and sucked my hot rod but I was holding out for the prize, he must have licked and sucked my cock and balls for over thirty pleasure filled minutes. I was not going to shoot off in this studs mouth, I wanted the backdoor prize and was going to get it. I pulled my cock out of his mouth and roughly slapped it across his face, I told him if he wanted his tip he would have to give me the goods. Manuel turned around and spread his tight meaty ass wide open. His golden brown love hole was glistening with wet juice and he was begging for relief. I decided I wanted to taste that sweet looking round cake and shoved my tongue way up inside, Manuel screamed with pleasure, I licked his sugar walls. By Manuel was begging for packing, he wanted exactly what I needed. I got behind him and mounted my attack, quickly shoving my tool inside his tight wet ass. After about three pumps I was not able to hold back, we both screamed as I shot my hot load up his sweet brown ass.
Was Jesus Gay...
or was he a switch-hitter?
Or maybe he was a sadomasochist? Into bestiality? A necrophile? Seeing as I haven't fucked or been fucked by Jesus yet, I really can't say what his sexual orientation is/was.
Unless he has fucked you or you have fucked him, you don't know any better than me.
All of which brings up an interesting question: why do so many Christians feel so strongly that their god must have been heterosexual? I doubt that very many have had any firsthand sexual experiences with the Son of Man on which to base their convictions, so why are they all so certain?
My guess is that its for the same reason as so many of them assume that their lord was white, able-bodied, relatively good-looking (certainly not fat). For the same reason that they assume he wanted to start a religion, that he would have voted Republican and opposed abortion today. Its like a New Right entrepeneur said a few years ago - "If Jesus came back today he would be an ad salesman"!
These assumptions tell us very little about Jesus of Galilee, but they do tell us an awful lot about the values of contemporary Christians. Incapable of seeing beyond their own historical context, they project their ideals onto their guru back two-thousand years, just as they project their fears into their vision of the Hell where all of the rest of us are supposed to end up.
Yet those who would resusitate the dying body of the Church by winning it away from the powers and principalities who have controlled it for two millenia can take heart in the fact that there are some Jesus-worshipping organizations trying to promote a less heterosexually-blinkered image of their God.
you got me this time AC fagg0r...the refresh timer saved you
if you ever come outta your momma's basement and quit playing everquest...call NAMBLA..they want to recruit you
(Score: -1, OBVIOUS)
A Nehemiah CallingNew Item gif
Friends,
One night last week the Lord woke me up in the middle of the night (that's getting to be a habit ) and as I was praying, the Lord showed me the walls of Jerusalem that were torn down . . . the gates of the city which had been trampled upon by their enemies . . . the scattering of the peoples of Jerusalem. He showed me a glimpse of the heart of Nehemiah who loved Jerusalem and whose heart was burdened for reconstruction.
Then the Lord showed me His Church . . . the walls have been broken down by her enemies, she has been trampled upon and beaten down and lays in ruins by the hand of her enemies . . . her inhabitants have been scattered. He showed me that in these last days He is raising up a company of Nehemiahs who would take the task to heart to rebuild the Church, to reconstruct the walls of the City of God, to set a watchman at each gate, to establish companies of worshippers to do service before Him during all watches.
He showed me that the materials and equipment needed for reconstruction have been released into our hands through intercession, fasting, separation, and consecration. He showed me that the Ark of His Presence would soon find a dwelling place in the midst of His Church, in the midst of the reconstructed City of God! That the latter house would indeed be more glorious than the former!
He showed me that He has raised up people who would accept the task of being gatekeepers, guarding each gate, hindering the enemy's attempts to enter and destroy. He is sending forth companies of scouts to search throughout the land for those who have been scattered and to escort them back within the gates of the Church, the City of God's Holy Dwelling!
The time is now for restoration, rebuilding, and strengthening the walls of the Church; there is a mighty move of God throughout the earth to prepare for Him a dwelling place in the midst of His People! Intercessors have been sent forth and commissioned to clean up the ruins and to set the City in order, redeeming that which has been destroyed by the hands of the enemy.
The call to intercession is a Nehemiah calling; those with a heart for restoration and rebuilding have been called to intercession as God is seeking a habitation among His people. He will not inhabit a City whose walls have been crushed and lay in ruin, but His dwellingplace will be seen in the midst of restoration and reconstruction.
In these last days, we are all challenged to be Nehemiah's . . . busy working to restore the Body of Christ (the Church), reclaiming it from the ruin brought about by the works of the enemy. We are called to unity and to call those back who have been scattered. We have been called to intercession, through groanings and birthings in the spirit through prayer.
I pray that we will all be sensitive to and answer the call!
Blessings,
an Ross
jross@focusontheword.com
Homepage: http://focusontheword.com
"No weapon that is formed against thee shall prosper; and every tongue that shall rise against thee in judgment thou shalt condemn. This is the heritage of the servants of the LORD, and their righteousness is of me, saith the LORD. (Isaiah 54:17)
UH most trolls dont have sigs and if trolls automatically post at -1 then they arent too worried about karma. and if we support slashdot then why are we crap flooding and page widening. you sir are fucking retarded.
Http://dlf.e-lite.org
III
1 "Love one another" it has been said is the supreme law, but what power made it so? Upon what rational authority does the gospel of love rest? Why should I not hate mine enemies-if I "love" them does that not place me at their mercy?
2 Is it natural for enemies to do good unto each other-and
WHAT IS GOOD?
3 Can the torn and bloody victim "love" the blood-splashed jaws that rend him limb from limb?
4 Are we not all predatory animals by instinct? If humans ceased wholly from preying upon each other, could they continue to exist?
5 Is not "lust and carnal desire" a more truthful term to describe "love" when applied to the continuance of the race? Is not the "love" of the fawning scriptures simply a euphemism for sexual activity, or was the "great teacher" a glorifier of eunuchs?
6 Love your enemies and do good to them that hate and use you-is this not the despicable philosophy of the spaniel that rolls upon its back when kicked?
7 Hate your enemies with a whole heart, and if a man smite you on one cheek, SMASH him on the other!; smite him hip and thigh, for self-preservation is the highest law!
8 He who turns the other cheek is a cowardly dog!
9 Give blow for blow, scorn for scorn, doom for doom-with compound interest liberally added thereunto! Eye for eye, tooth for tooth, aye four-fold, a hundred-fold! Make yourself a Terror to your adversary, and when he goeth his way, he will possess much additional wisdom to ruminate over. Thus shall you make yourself respected in all the walks of life, and your spirit-your immortal spirit-shall live, not in an intangible paradise, but in the brains and sinews of those whose respect you have gained
THE BOOK OF SATAN
II
1 Behold the crucifix; what does it symbolize? Pallid in-competence hanging on a tree.
2 I question all things. As I stand before the festering and varnished facades of your haughtiest moral dogmas, I write thereon in letters of blazing scorn: Lo and behold; all this is fraud!
3 Gather around me, Oh! ye death-defiant, and the earth itself shall be thine, to have and to hold!
4 Too long the dead hand has been permitted to sterilize living thought!
5 Too long right and wrong, good and evil have been inverted by false prophets!
6 No creed must be accepted upon authority of a "divine" nature. Religions must be put to the question. No moral dogma must be taken for granted-no standard of measurement deified. There is nothing inherently sacred about moral codes. Like the wooden idols of long ago, they are the work of human hands, and what man has made, man can destroy!
7 He that is slow to believe anything and everything is of great understanding, for belief in one false principle is the beginning of all unwisdom.
8 The chief duty of every new age is to upraise new men to determine its liberties, to lead it towards material suc-cess-to tend the rusty padlocks and chains of dead custom that always prevent healthy expansion. Theories and ideas that may have meant life and hope and freedom for our ancestors may now mean destruction, slavery, and dishonor to us!
9 As environments change, no human ideal standeth sure!
10 Whenever, therefore, a lie has built unto itself a throne, let it be assailed without pity and without regret, for under the domination of an inconvenient falsehood, no one can prosper.
11 Let established sophisms be dethroned, rooted out, burnt and destroyed, for they are a standing menace to all true nobility of thought and action!
12 Whatever alleged "truth" is proven by results to be but an empty fiction, let it be unceremoniously flung into the outer darkness, among the dead gods, dead empires, dead philosophies, and other useless lumber and wreckage!
13 The most dangerous of all enthroned lies is the holy, the sanctified, the privileged lie -the lie everyone believes to be a model truth. It is the fruitful mother of all other popular errors and delusions. It is a hydra-headed tree of unreason with a thousand roots. It is a social cancer!
14 The lie that is known to be a lie is half eradicated, but the lie that even intelligent persons accept as fact-the lie that has been inculcated in a little child at its mother's knee is more dangerous to contend against than a creeping pestilence!
15 Popular lies have ever been the most potent enemies of personal liberty. There is only one way to deal with them:
Cut them out, to the very core, just as cancers. Extermi-nate them root and branch. Annihilate them, or they will us!
THE BOOK OF SATAN I 1 In this arid wilderness of Steel and stone I raise up my voice that you may hear. To the East and to the West I beckon. To the North and to the South I show a sign proclaiming: Death to the weakling, wealth to the strong! 2 Open your eyes that you may see, Oh men of mildewed minds, and listen to me ye bewildered millions! 3 For I stand forth to challenge the wisdom of the world; to interrogate the "laws" of man and of "God"! 4 I request reasons for your golden rule and ask the why and wherefore of your ten commands. 5 Before none of your printed idols do I bend in acquiescence, and he who saith "thou shalt" to me is my mortal foe! 6 I dip my forefinger in the watery blood of your impotent mad redeemer, and write over his thorn-torn brow: The TRUE prince of evil-the king of the slaves! 7 No hoary falsehood shall be a truth to me; no stifling dogma shall encramp my pen! S I break away from all conventions that do not lead to my earthly success and happiness. 9 I raise up in stern invasion the standard of the strong! 10 I gaze into the glassy eye of your fearsome Jehovah, and pluck him by the beard; I uplift a broad-axe, and split open his worm-eaten skull! 11 I blast out the ghastly contents of philosophically whited sepulchers and laugh with sardonic wrath!
THE
NINE
SATANIC
STATEMENTS
1 Satan represents indulgence, instead of abstinence!
2 Satan represents vital existence, instead of spiritual pipe dreams!
3 Satan represents undefiled wisdom, instead of hypocritical self-deceit!
4 Satan represents kindness to those who deserve it, instead of love wasted on ingrates!
5 Satan represents vengeance, instead of turning the other cheek!
6 Satan represents responsibility to the responsible, instead of concern for psychic vampires!
7 Satan represents man as just another animal, sometimes better, more often worse than those that walk on all
fours, who, because of his "divine spiritual and intellectual development," has become the most vicious animal
of all!
8 Satan represents all of the so-called sins, as they all lead to physical, mental, or emotional gratification!
9 Satan has been the best friend the church has ever had, as he has kept it in business all these years!
i put more work into my version and then scrolled down and noticed yours...still great trolls think a like
Jon Katz and timothy enlisted the help of a 23-year-old woman who agreed to help the domestic partners have a baby through in vitro fertilization. ''Raising children is the most important thing you can do,'' timothy said. Katz and timothy said they want to keep the surrogate mother's identity secret. They said they fear stress from publicity might hurt her, the quadruplets, or her own three children, who include twin toddlers. Growing Generations, a California company that works with gays and surrogate mothers, says there have been triplet births among the company's 200 clients, but no quadruplets. Shirley Zager, director of the Illinois-based Organization of Parents through Surrogacy, said that to her knowledge, no quadruplets have been born to a surrogate and a gay man through in vitro fertilization. The surrogate did authorize a spokeswoman for Central Baptist Hospital to confirm that she was pregnant with quadruplets conceived through in vitro fertilization. Katz and timothy said they're concerned that publicity will somehow interfere with their plans to become the best possible parents. They said they know many people don't think gay men and lesbians should raise children. They also don't want their children to become the center of media attention. Pursuing fatherhood timothy and Katz met in California in 1998. By 2000, they were busy building a news website(slashdot.org), but their home seemed empty, and they decided to pursue fatherhood. Last fall, a 23-year-old woman came into the salon with three children. Katz thought the children were adorable. He kidded the woman about taking them home. Then he heard her say she felt as if she had been given a calling: to become a surrogate mother. She agreed to help timothy and Katz. Working through a San Francisco fertility clinic, she became pregnant in January. The men said they are following California law in paying her only for medical and living expenses. Those costs run $1,000 each month. "timothy will be 'Dad,' because he's the biological father," Katz said. "I'll be 'Jon.'" timothy and Katz said the surrogate mother has told them she doesn't want to be involved in raising the children on a regular basis. But the men said they will always let her know how the babies are doing.
o LSD ( 'Acid' )
// \___ / '... LSD is best understood as a
C H D-Lysergic acid diethylamide
/ 2 5 'I see the true importance of LSD
O==C--N in the possibility of providing
| \ material aid to meditation aimed at the
| C H mystical experience of a deeper,
|___ 2 5 comprehensive reality. Such a
/ \ use accords entirely with the essence
N-CH and working character of LSD as a
\\___/ 3 sacred drug.' Dr Albert Hofmann,
/ \ the discoverer of LSD.
| || || powerful unspecific amplifier, or
| || || catalyst, of mental processes, which
\\ / \ / facilitates the emergence of human
N pysche. ' Dr Stan Grof, Esalen Institute.
H
LSD is believed to be illegally manufactured in Northern Californian and, perhaps also, Holland. An underground lab was also busted in England in early 1991. LSD is cheap and widely available. The currently hip English name for acid is 'A'. There are many dosage forms available: pieces of paper or cardboard ('tabs' -- often with colour pictures printed on them), very small pills ('microdots') and transparent gelatin sheets ('windowpane'). The doses present in each unit are on average 75-125 micrograms (mcg) of very pure LSD. This is a quite a strong dose but about half the strength of the 1960s dose. This, and the greater public knowledge of the drug, is probably why bad trips are less common now than in the past.
The lowest psychedelic dose is 50 mcg -- ecommended for beginners.Doses below this level have a similar effect to cannabis or MDMA. The effects increase with dosage until about 400-500 mcgs where any more
has no more effect. LSD cannot cause toxic poisoning but in this dosage range bad trips are practically certain. The effects last up to eight or twelve hours. LSD must be treated with respect. It can be a completely overwhelming experience. Nevertheless, contrary to popular belief acid will not turn normal people permanently insane. Since acid came back into fashion the media treatment of the subject has been appallingly inaccurate. In September 1989 a English football fan fell overboard a ferry to Sweden and was presumably drowned. It was reported that this had resulted from LSD use. He had died fifteen minutes after taking a tab. However, LSD takes about half an hour to an hour to have any effect and, therefore, is unlikely to have contributed to his death. What the media had paid less attention to was been drinking very heavily. 'Drunk drowns' is obviously an inferior headline to 'Trip To Hell'.
how about you have a nice tall frothy glass of horse cum
anonymously homosekulle
A list of semen cryopreservation facilities for transsexuals to use for long-term storage.
If you transition you will lose the ability to have children. Even if you change your mind and stop hormones, there may be irrecovable damage to your reproductive ability. If you're a childless MtF transsexual you might want to consider a sperm bank. If someday you make a life-long committment with another women, maybe you'll want children? Here is a list of cryopreservation facilites across the United States and Canada (listed by state in alphabetical order). FtM transsexuals may also want to contact these places. They may be able to cryopreserve ovaries too!
This information is only for informational purposes. Neither me nor any other person or entity is endorsing these organizations.
There may be typos. I rushed to get this information posted because I feel it's so important. Please let me know about any errors, If there's a typo I can tell you what the correct information is.
I hope this information is helpful for you. I wish I had it when I was desperately looking for it. Good luck!
Katherine
2. Tea bag - As you are sitting on a girl's face, repeatedly dip your scrotum in and out of her mouth, similar to a tea bag in a cup of hot water. An old favorite.
3. Hot Lunch - While receiving head from a woman, you shit on her chest. (a.k.a. the Cleveland Steamer)
4. The Stranger - Sitting on your hand until it falls asleep and then jerking off, eliciting the feeling of a hand job from someone else.
5. Donkey Punch - Banging a girl doggy style and then moments before you cum, sticking your dick in her ass, and then punching her in the back of the head. This gives a tremendous sensation, but for it to work correctly, the girl must be knocked out so that her asshole tightens up.
6. Golden Shower - Any form of peeing on a girl. (aka: watersports)
7. Pearl Necklace - Well known. Whenever you cum on the neck/cleavage area of a girl, it takes on the look of beautiful jewelry.
8. Coyote - This occurs when you wake up in the room of a nasty skank and you know you've got to give her the slip. However, you realize that your arm is wrapped around her. Therefore, you must gnaw off your own arm to get out of this situation. Can be very painful.
9. Purple Mushroom - This occurs when a woman is giving you oral sex and you withdraw your penis in order to poke it back into her cheek. It should leave a lasting impression similar to a purple mushroom.
10. The Flying Camel - A personal favorite. As she is lying on her back and you are hammering her from your knees, you carefully balance yourself without using your arms to prop yourself up. You then to flap your arms and let out a long, shrieking howl. Strictly a class move.
11. Double Fishhook - From the doggy - style position, you hook your pinky fingers in her mouth and pull back to achieve deeper penetration.
12. The Ram - Again, you're attacking from behind, when you start ramming her head against the wall in a rhythmic motion. The force of the wall should allow for deeper penetration. Very handy for those lulls in penile sensitivity.
13. Dog in a Bathtub - This is the proper name for when you attempt to insert your nuts into a girl's ass. It is so named because it can be just as hard as keeping a dog in the tub while giving it a bath.
14. The Bronco - Back to reality with this classic. You start by going doggy style and then just when she is really enjoying it, you grab onto her tits as tightly as possible and yell another girl's name. This gives you the feeling of riding a bronco as she tries to buck you off.
15. Pink Glove - This frequently happens during sex when a girl is not wet enough. When you pull out to give her the money, the inside of her twat sticks to your hog. Thus, the pink glove.
16. The Fountain of You - While sitting on her face and having her eat your ass, jerk off like a madman. Build up as much pressure as possible before releasing, spewing like a venerable geyser all over her face, neck and tits. (Better in her bed)
17. New York Style Taco - Anytime when you are so drunk that when you go down on her, you puke on her box. Happy trails!
18. Dirty Sanchez - While banging a girl doggy style, quickly stick 2 fingers deep into her starfish, then reach around and wipe the residue on her upper lip, providing her a mustache.
19. Western Grip - When jerking off, turn your hand around, so that your thumb is facing towards you. It is the same grip that rodeo folks use; hence, western.
20. The Blumpkin - You need to find a real tramp to do this right. It involves having her suck you off while you're on the shitter.
21. The Bismark - Another one involving oral sex. Right before you are about to spew, pull out and shoot all over her face. Follow that with a punch and smear the blood and jism together.
22. Jelly Doughnut - A derivation of the Bismark. All you have to do is punch her in the nose while you are getting head.
23. Woody Woodpecker - While a chick is sucking on your balls, repeatedly tap the head of your cock on her forehead.
24. Tossing salad - Well known by now. A prison act where one person is forced to chow starfish with the help of whatever condiments are available, i.e. Jello, jism, etc
25. The Fish Eye - Working from behind, you shove your finger in her pooper. Thereupon, she turns around in a one - eyed winking motion to see what the hell you are doing.
26. Tuna Melt - You're down on a chick, lapping away, and you discover that it's her time of the month. By no means do you stop though. When the whale spews, tartar sauce with a hint of raspberry smothers your face.
27. The Fur Ball - You're chomping away at some mighty Zena who has a mane between her legs the size of Lionel Richie's afro, when a mammoth fur ball gets lodged in your throat. You punch her.
28. The Chili Dog - You take a dump on the girl's chest and then titty fuck her.
29. Gaylord Perry - Going to only one knuckle during an anal probe is for wimps. Make this famous knuckle - ball pitcher proud and use multiple digits on that virgin corn hole. A minimum of 2 knuckles required (either on one finger or on multiple).
30. The Rear Admiral - An absolute blast. When getting a chick from behind (with both partners standing), make sure you don't let her grab onto anything when she is bent over. Then, drive your hips into her backside so that the momentum pushes her forward. The goal is to push her into a wall or table, or have her trip and fall on her face. You attain the status of Admiral when you can push her around the room without crashing into anything and not using your hands to grab onto her hips.
31. Glass Bottom Boat - Putting saran wrap over the skank's face and taking a dump.
32. Ray Bans - Put your nuts over her eye sockets while getting head. You're can is on her forehead. Yes, it may be anatomically impossible, but it is definitely worth a try.
33. The Snowmobile - When plugging a girl while she's on all fours, reach around and sweep out her arms so she falls on her face.
34. The Dutch Oven - Also well known. Whenever you fart while humping, pull the covers over her head. Don't let her out until all movement ceases.
35. Smoking Pole - Self Explanatory. Don't use fire.
36. Rusty Trombone - Getting the reacharound while getting your salad tossed. Also known as milking the prostate.
37. Turkey Shoot - When you're coming, come on her face and let it drip off her chin so it looks like that red shit on the turkey's chin.
38. Stovepiping - Taking it in the Tush.
39. Rusty Anchor - After a healthy term of the Stovepiping, the recipient gets to enjoy a good fudgesicle.
40. Sandpiper - A stovepiping on the local beach, desert, or playground sandbox. Also known as the Sandblast.
41. Lucky Pierre - the middle man in a three way buttfuck. Also known as the french sandwich.
42. UPDATED!!!! NEW LISTINGS!!!! Divortex - A mystical place into which old friends are sucked when a married couple splits up.
43. Blump - To suck someone's dick while they are taking a dump.
44. Bustard - A very rude bus driver.
45. Cold Faithful - Blowing your visibly - steaming load outside in the winter - time, like when you get your cock sucked on a ski - lift.
46. Grand pappy smash - To beat your meat so hardcore that it starts to chafe and bleed.
47. Esplanade - To attempt an explanation while drunk.
48. Flatulence - The emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.
49. Butt Rodeo - When you're going at it with a girl, you flip her over real fast, start ramming her in the ass and yell as loud as possible "BUTT RODEO!" You then see how long you can ride her till she tosses ya off!
50. Bargoyle - The hideous old hair - spray hag who seems to live at your local watering hole. She usually smokes endlessly, spends hundreds of dollars a night on video - poker, and makes sexually threatening comments to frightened college freshmen.
51. Pasteurize - Once you get her hairy bush pasteurize, you got it licked!
52. Beerelevant - A point which does not seem to be particularly important, given enough beer
53. Mangry - Describing the anger of women who are angry at men, specifically. "She's such a bitch, she's just plain mangry."
54. Clitourist - A man who won't stop and ask for directions in bed. ie: "Because of his fouled foreplay, Suzy realized that her new boyfriend was no experienced bedroom traveler, but merely a clitourist."
55. Stuffucking - The act of "stuffing in" your limp, helpless member in hopes of getting it up. Potential causes: you're too drunk or she's too ugly. (see also; Fugly)
56. Antlers - Wide, flat, flapjack titties that come to a sharp point at the nipples.
57. The Zombie Mask While getting head from your favorite, unsuspecting, trash - barrel whore, tell her you want her to look right up at you with those "pretty little eyes" when you blow your load. Then, just when you're ready to spew a good weeks worth of goo, blast that hefty load in both eyes. This temporary state of blindness will produce the zombie effect as she stumbles around the room with arms outstretched, and moaning like the walking dead.
58. The Flaming Amazon - This one's for all you pyromaniacs out there. When you're screwing some chick, right when your about to cum, pull out and quickly grab the nearest lighter and set her pubes on fire, then extinguish the flames with your jizz!
59. The Screwnicorn - When a dyke puts her strap - on dildo on her forehead and proceeds to go at her partner like a crazed unicorn.
60. Split pissonality - When you're taking a leak and you get two streams out of the one hole!
61. A Short in the Cord - A "code" phrase used by the common man to refer to Testicular Tendon Tangle Syndrome. Ex. "Oh fuck! My nuts are killing me... I think I've got a short in the cord."
62. Old Jism Trail - The stream of semen oozing down the chin and chest of someone who has just finished fellating a senior citizen.
63. Abdicate - To give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
64. Lymph - To walk with a lisp.
65. Anal Boot - An anal boot is when you take a pitcher of beer, everyone spits in it, someone stirs it with their cock and then the mixture is poured through the crack of a man ass into the waiting mouth of the loser of a bet or drinking game.
66. Australian Death Grip - The act of grabbing a woman by the haunches/crotch and staring deeply into her eyes until you're slapped or kissed. A recommended tactic for very crowded bars. Another great opportunity for wagering among friends.
67. Fumilingus - When a man (or woman) performs cunnilingus on a woman and she farts directly in his/her face.
68. Intoxicourse - Having sexual intercourse whilst piss - drunk.
69. Valsalva - The act of pinching shut (with thumb and forefinger) a woman's nose while receiving fellatio; most effective when employed just prior to the release point due to the gag reflex and ensuing swallow that the woman is forced to do to continue breathing. A great first date ploy, as it sets the stage for what the rules of engagement will be going forward.
70. Insta - gasm - Pre - mature ejaculation at the sight of a beautiful woman. ie: "She was so fine, I had an insta - gasm before I could get her clothes off!"
71. Manual Deconstipation - This is where you get out the hand cream and go in manually for the hammerhead by breaking it into smaller chunks and pulling it out a piece at a time.
72. Post Poodum Syndrome - The feeling of depression felt after successful removal of a hammerhead. The excitement has passed, and you must now find something else to occupy your time.
73. The Homolic Maneuver - Using your penis to dislodge an object blocking a choking victim's windpipe.
74. The Houdini - Going at it doggy style until you are just about to come, then pull out and spit hard, but quietly, on her back so she thinks that you have come. When she turns around unleash a blast into her face and she is left shocked and amazed, wondering at what a great guy you are, and how you managed it.
75. The Angry Dragon - Immediately after you blow your load in a girl's mouth, smack the back of her head and make it come out her nose. When she gets up she'll look like an angry dragon. The harder you laugh, the angrier she'll look. Magic.
76. Cum Guzzling Sperim Burping Coke Drinking Bitch - The once in a lifetime act of blowing a hot steamy load down the back of a girl's throat and then proceeding to force a large cold bottle of Coke into her mouth. Shake her head vigorously back and forth to create the Cum Guzzling, Sperm Burping effect. A great way to impress any friends in the room.
77. Errol Flynn (Much Like Dirty Sanchez) - A time honoured event in which, while laying the bone doggy - style, you insert your finger into her asshole. You then pull it out and wipe it across her upper lip, leaving a thin shit moustache. At the same time pull her hair back from her forehead. This makes her look like Errol Flynn.
78. The Donkey Punch - Banging a girl doggy style and then moments before you cum, you stick your dick in her ass and then punch her hard in the back of the neck. The blow to the neck will make her arc her back and tense her arse muscles, which will constrict the penis and give you a tremendous orgasmic experience when you ejaculate.
It was a small miracle that the amber liquid from the shaking bottle found its way into Murdoc's glass--it was his fourth drink. Murdoc asked his pretty, young contact again why she couldn't find any work for his services. She responded with, "It's your reputation, Murdoc. The organization doesn't think your strong anymore."
Murdoc tried to contain his drunken rage and told her, "Listen to me, Carmen, you tell your keepers that I am still Murdoc, I never failed on a mission save one, and I am still the worst thing that can happen to your enemies!"
She put on her large red hat with its gold band to hide her features as she stood up and added, "You'd better take care of your obsession first. Murdoc used to mean fear, now it's just the name of some thug with a chequered past." Carmen tossed a fresh $100 bill into the table's pool of spilt alcohol and melted ice. As its dry crispness gave way to the overwhelming moisture she parted with the words, "Get help Murdoc. It hurts me to see you this way."
Two drinks latter Murdoc spirited the soggy money into his pocket. In a drunken haze he made his way home and started up his dark room. There was just one more roll of film that he needed to develop. It was of MacGyver. When he selected his favorite he blew it up and placed it on his wall.
It was his wall of MacGyver--because the name ANGUS MACGYVER was written in large day glow letters above hundreds of other photos taken of Murdoc's only failure.
Smoke. MacGyver smelt smoke before he opened his eyes. The natural instinct to panic killed any of the sweet caress that the sandman brought him. Even before his eyes opened he pondered the possibility of waking up with the house on fire ran wild in his fear infested mind. This was a houseboat--how could it have caught fire? In the moment before he prepared to abandon his home Mac's overactive head for mechanics tried to figure out how his home could come to such a fate. He did not smoke, have an electric heater on, or leave anything on the stove. The stove--it had to be the stove, because of eggs. Mac's keen nose picked the mild scent of burning eggs within the smoke.
The blond beauty sat up instantly--eyes open, blankets flying and a single name on his lips, "Penny!"
There was a cobweb of light yet pungent gray smoke throughout MacGyver's home and in the far corner of the sad scene of chaos was the charmingly hopeless Penny Parker. She was covered in fine white flour and juggling gobs of eggs and shells off her hands into a smoking fry pan.
She wrestled with breakfast in an outfit that someone in the first grade might wear. It was a jumper in a smart green plaid, matching yellow hose and a cream colored blouse. Her shiny patent leather Mary Jane's were hanging on the hooks meant for the oven mitts. Mac had to get her out of his home or be subject to these kind of surprises forever.
Murdoc balanced the weapon on his shoulder as the unshaven dealer praised its features and abilities. As he popped open the eyepiece Murdoc was careful to point the rocket launcher out the window. If this weapon had gone off in this run down Compton crack house the blast might shift the mess from an eyesore to a blaze.
While Murdoc imagined the children playing down the street in the scope as MacGyver, the crusty gun runner added, "I can see this is you! But ya need something for close range, just in case the cops come from behind!" The pile that the runner searched through created a mild dust cloud that fell to the floor when he produced a large bowie knife.
Murdoc who was still looking through the scope was in his own world. The dealer began to praise the blade and compare it to the ones used by the latest movie action heroes. Murdoc with his hand stroking the length of the rocket launcher bluntly interrupted the sales pitch by asking, "Don't you sell flat unmarked hand guns?" Once again the runner rifled though his pile of guns. Murdoc now fixed his gaze on the dealer. The gun runner pulled out an old black gun and swore to Murdoc, "The last person to fire this gun is probably long dead." Murdoc raised an eyebrow while confirming his satisfaction with an evil grin. His expression turned to one of shock when the dealer named his price.
you're not a troll...you're a linux nerd in disquise but you cant fool me...all other trolls that agree please let him know
haha and then you said "pubic" forum...how appropriate you tool
uh its a troll you non trolling fuck..take troll outta your name...you dont deserve it
My Quick Bio
:o( Wish I had a big guy for a BF, so if anyone of you big bellied guys that are interested in a LTR (Long Term Relationship) and are reading this and you like what you see please email me :o)
:O) Some really cute guys too.
Name: Tom Martin
Location: Niagara Falls, ON
Hair Color: Brown
Eye Color: Brown
Height: 6'3
Weight: 250lbs
AIM (AOL Instant Messanger) Nick: BigTBearUSA
Info About Me
I'm a 22 year old goateed bear currently living in Niagara Falls, Ontario (or as others call it the honeymoon capital of the world) which I can see because it is really romantic here.
I only have one problem tho, since I am single, I have no one to do all those romantic things with
Anyways, I'm into Music (R&B, Hip-Hop, Dance, Rap and some Rock and even a little Country) pretty wierd combination huh? For Sports, I'm really into Football and just some Baseball and Basketball, but Football tops the list, I like playing it along with watching it. My favorite football teams are the Green Bay Packers, Buffalo Bills and New England Patriots mostly because I really like some of the guys on those teams, especially Green Bay. Other things I am into are Travelling, Computers, Wrestling, a little Photography and Cooking.
Sexually, I'm really into cuddling, especially cuddling up with a big bellied guy that is around my age (19 to 34 in that area). I love cuddling up to his big belly and laying my head on his chest just hearing his heartbeat (I could do that for hours on end). Other things that I like are lots of touching, giving and receiving massages, kissing and of course hugging. All done with that young, big bellied man.
I am looking for guys who like pretty much the same things that I like and that are open and honest and who are not afraid to show their feelings. I am all of the above except for the fact that I am really shy especially in person. I would like a guy who could help me out from my shell (as they say)
I graduated from Niagara College taking a 3 year Tourism program, which I graduated in April of 2000. Now after I can save up enough money I plan on moving to the United States somewhere either in New England or the Southwest. One thing I really like about the United States (especially big cities) are all the buildings, just the way some of them are designed kind of like that old archectural style (If you don't understand, its kinda hard to explain hehe), another thing is all the hot guys that are in the US
Anyways, there is some information about me. If you would like to know more you can email me or sign my guestbook by clicking on the links near the bottom of this page or if you see me online just drop me a message and say hi (Especially all you big bellied cute bears)