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User: gijoel

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Comments · 405

  1. The Bible is clear on this. on Human-Robot Love and Marriage · · Score: 1

    It's Adam and Eve; Not Adam and C-3...PO!

  2. Re:This will drive the Taliban crazy on DARPA Semifinalists Selected · · Score: 1

    No, the Taliban ambushes the vehicle in order to kidnap the occupants. The car promptly turns into a freakin huge robot that proceeds to beat the tar out of them.

  3. Re:Well, crap! on William Gibson Gives Up on the Future · · Score: 2, Insightful

    But on the brighter side the sky won't look like a television tuned to a dead channel.

  4. Groupthink on Federal Science Gets More Politicized · · Score: 1

    The more I think about it, the more I believe that your government (and my own Australian government alas) seems to exhibiting a massive case of Groupthink.

    You have a leader who is more than willing to express an opinion on any and every topic. Irrespective of the complexity of the issues involved.ie stem cells, climate change.

    A cabinet that is filled with several "mindguards", people who will attack opinions that don't agree with the leaders. ie Don Rumsfeld's refusing to allow his department to prepare for life after victory.

    A cabinet that is composed of people from similar backgrounds. Bush, Cheney and Rice all have strong connections to the oil industry and have served on the boards of oil companies.

    A cabinet that fundamentally does not trust outsiders and their advice. See their immediate dismissal of their Generals assessments on the number of troops needed to invade and hold Iraq.

    Their only devil's advocate (Colin Powell) was pretty much outmaneuvered, ignored and browbeaten into towing the party line.

    Unlike Kennedy, I don't think Dubya is smart enough to see the flaws in his thinking and it will keep going on like this until they're thrown out.

  5. Re:Darn on Enigma Machine for Sale on eBay · · Score: 2, Funny

    A rare Abwehr Enigma machine, designated G312, was stolen from the Bletchley Park museum on 1 April 2000. In September, a man identifying himself as "The Master" sent a note demanding £25,000 and threatened to destroy the machine if the ransom was not paid.


    The Master, eh? What's Mr. Saxon going to do about this, I'd like to know.
  6. Well I guess Polonium 210, on Bogus Company Obtains Nuclear License · · Score: 1

    isn't just for the Russians anymore.

  7. Re:First clone the scientists, double productivity on Korea to Clone Drug Sniffing Dogs · · Score: 1

    EXECUTE ORDER 66

    Oh wait, you said Drug War didn't you?

  8. Re:it's easy... on Have Spammers Overcome the CAPTCHA? · · Score: 4, Funny

    And that porn site will be ripped and put on a torrent within a week. Thus defeating the Captcha farm.

  9. Re:obligatory on Armed Police Bots with Stun Guns · · Score: 1

    I just dread those things telling me I have 30 seconds to comply.

  10. Re:Good Advice is Useless when Ignored. on Military Running a Parallel Earth Simulator · · Score: 2, Insightful

    If a computer had told him the same thing, he probably would have had it melted down and sold for scrap metal.


    Actually they would have called it a simulation error, rejigged the numbers until they got the simulation they wanted. Then gone to the media proudly displaying their scientifically proven scenario.
  11. I know what happened. on The Sopranos Ends With a ... · · Score: 0

    Avon shot Tony Sophrano and then was killed by Federation troops.

    Least that's how I remembered it as a kid.

  12. Re:Pedicabo ego vos et irrumabo on Star Wars Takes Over Harvard Commencement · · Score: -1, Troll

    Translates as:

    I will fuck your arse and rape your throat.

  13. The Fools on Sunken Treasure Worth $500 Million Found Off England · · Score: 2, Funny

    It's only a matter of time before they realise the treasure is cursed and they have to go out and fight Johnny Depp. Then stab Orlando Bloom.

    So I guess it isn't all bad news.

  14. Shakespear's Beowulf on Chimps Evolved More Than Humans · · Score: 1

    You're assuming he's human. In fact, he's a beowulf cluster of chimps typing away on keyboards.


    My God, you've also explained who Shakespear was.
  15. Tag this story Laughing Man on The Myth of the Superhacker · · Score: 1

    Ghost in the shell fans will know what I mean.

  16. Re:Kathy's SSN is 558-27-4440 (more inside) on Bloggers Propose Code of Conduct · · Score: 1

    Fascinating read. Could you give us your real name, address and phone number?

    I know that there is probably a 17 hour time difference between you and me, but I'm sure you wouldn't mind me calling you at 3 am to discuss this issue with you.

  17. Where in the world are the fish? on More Videogames, Fewer Books at Some Schools? · · Score: 1

    Hmmm, dead fish in the pond, Eiffle tower stolen, Pyramids missing.

    Only one person in the entire world would have the audacity to pull off this crime.

  18. Frakking Toasters!!! on Software Bug Halts F-22 Flight · · Score: 1

    It wasn't the International Dateline, it was those damn Cylons trying to launch an attack on Humanity.

    Fortunately thanks to the efforts of a small beagle and his dog house/sopwith Camel the world is safe again.

  19. Oh this is just great! on Power Generating Spacesuits · · Score: 1

    Now the Matrix is going to be installing treadmills in my goo pod and forcing me to wear this crap.

  20. Re:To solve a problem, you have to go to the sourc on 25 Percent of All Computers in a Botnet? · · Score: 1

    You're right. The only way to be sure is to nuke it from orbit.

  21. Re:Damn, That's One Ugly Shark on Rare Shark Filmed in Japan · · Score: 0

    Try putting a laser on the top of that thing's head

  22. Re:Kidnapper was president of local Mac user's gro on Kidnap Victim Visible Via Xbox Community Site · · Score: 1

    Fuck I hope you're joking.

    Uncyclopedia is an open wiki humor page. It is not Wikipedia!

    Some of it is quite amusing, most of it is barely coherent Leeroy Jenkins jokes.

  23. This is the voice of FATE on New Plan In UK For "Big Brother" Database · · Score: 1

    England Prevails

  24. Re:They don't need this German guy on Giant Rabbits To Feed North Korea · · Score: 1
    They just need to follow Homer's logic: Expose the rabbits to radiation, thereby making them big.


    Don't get me angry, Doc!
    You wouldn't like me when I get angry.
  25. Re:Arbitrary? on Doomsday Clock To Advance · · Score: 1

    It could be Star Trek: The Wonder Years.