goatse.cx · Domains · Slashdot Mirror

Oh yeah? by Marijuana+al-Shehi · 2002-09-30 12:37 · Score: 0, Troll · on 22lb Ice Blocks From the Sky

I place as much faith in your infidel superstitions as I place in "you're" grammar. By the way, how were you able to post your drivel in post-Columbine, post-911, post-RAPTURE America? I guess you got Left Behind, sucker.

Re:DON'T DO IT!!! YOU'LL LOSE YOUR EYESIGHT! by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-30 10:36 · Score: -1, Offtopic · on Laser Vision Surgery for Developers?

You are gay like Rick Austenson. FOAD you homo!

fp by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-30 10:34 · Score: -1, Troll · on Laser Vision Surgery for Developers?

First Post... Rick Austenson is a homo who buttfucks Michael A Hartman!

Perhaps ... by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-30 10:09 · Score: -1 · on Study Validates Benefits of 'Lorenzo's Oil'

... we could lubricate this guy with some of this oil.

Here's your screenshot! by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-30 09:16 · Score: -1, Redundant · on Public Up-Skirt Cams Ruled Legal

Exhibit A

WOW! by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-30 07:37 · Score: -1, Troll · on MIT OpenCourseWare Now Online

Imagine a beowulf cluster of these!

This troll brought to you by goatse.

Re:Hi-Res Trailer by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-30 06:10 · Score: -1, Troll · on New Trailer For The Two Towers

This has the highest resolution ever possible.

Re:FP by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-30 05:04 · Score: -1, Troll · on Public-Domain Bookmobile Hits the Road

YES!!! CONGRADULATIONS!!! YOU'RE THE LUCKY WINNER! BY GETTING THE FIRST POST TO THIS LUCKY DISCUSSION, YOU MAY HAVE ALREADY WON A 7-DAY TRIP TO HAWAII WITH 3 HOT PLAYBOY MODELS WITH 1000$ SPENDING MONEY PER DAY!!!

CLICK HERE FOR CLAIMING YOUR PRIZE.

Must be 18 or older. Void where prohibited. In select states only.

This... by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-30 02:24 · Score: -1, Troll · on Which Artists Support Music Swapping?

... artist lets you swap his art all over the internet. FP.

Re:META: Please flag PDF-links bojay fag jorn fag by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-29 21:57 · Score: 0 · on O'Reilly Publishing Mac OS X for Unix Geeks

Hi, I'm a fag, and I'm Jorn Barger. I've been on Slashcrap (/. to all the noobs, ghuh ghuh garsh) FOREVER. I invented Slashdot. See my UID, that was my 10th account. It was a hoax! I had UID 0 but TACO stole it! I CASTED MAGIC MISSLE AND THE 20 SIDED DIE SAID I WON! But everyone else cheated and you see my low UID thats how low it is EVEN WITH CHEATERS! I am a fag, and a rageing socialist prick. See things like being around longer make me better than everyone else. I am intellectually stronger and all my proto-communist socialist beliefs are GOOD! And my UID IS LOW! And I dont think WEB PAGES should be shown how YOU WANT THEM TO BE SHOWN, its up to me TO DEFINE THEM. Death to you controlling things with your BROWSER. Anyways, it will be nice blow you. Oh, Simplex 2 Herpes?; I love the puss! I have Simplex 50 herpes! YUM! Time for me to go down and get to work.

Jorn Barger , I want you to fuck me in the ass please. I am dying to be anally accosted. I want to be ravaged like hog. I want you to dress like a farmer and make me oink like a pig. I want an ass reaming like no other. Jorn Barger , I haven't had this kind of lust for you since the crazy college days. We used to butt fuck each other in the stalls. You always told me not to flush and preferred using my feces as apposed to real lubricant. I remember your chocolaty member, your manhood, draped in my feces. Man, Jorn Barger

, I remember. I was day dreaming, escaping into a nether world where we used to fornicate, and live in fornicatory bliss. You used to like to keep your tubes socks on to enhance they gay look. We were so flitty and light on our feet. I am so very confused these days. I have difficulty conceptualizing the time that was then in contrast to now. I mean, first you were a raging homosexual, now you wont look me in the eye because of this anime woman. I know that bitch is a transvestite, and you lust after my ass while you are being tentacle raped. You are closeting your homosexuality and denying your roots in my ass! Don't be fooled! JORN BARGER knows how to suck a dick. He may nibble, and bite, and pretend to be sheepish at first, but deep down this cock loving acolyte of shaft licks cock like a bar maid. I am destabilizing. The world is going dark to me. I have scintillating threads of motley thoughts; my ability to control my self evanesces away! I have only an adamantine desire to see your balloon knot once again, and to have you ravage mine! JORN BARGER - I NEED YOUR HOT MAN SEX NOW. This is your long lost butt buddy Joe, please come back.

My name is JORN BARGER and I'm here to Say
I'm a Virgin and I'm gay
I'm looking for some ass if you give me some
If you don't mind making out with a bum
Call the number on the screen! - I may look like a whimp
But in bed I'm mean!

JORN BARGER HERE here again, and I'm at the drums
I'm looking for sex amongst the bums
I have a lot of trouble with HTML
I keep telling people smarter than me to go to hell
I give anonymous blowjobs in the subway
I'm saving for more video games and homoerotic anime

Jorn Barger and Gay Joe, from the album ASS.SE.CX Ass Secks.

Bojay Iverson fuck my ass!

Re:Pringles Can Antenna by packeteer · 2002-09-29 18:09 · Score: 0, Troll · on Secret Service Goes War Driving

no nathan THIS is an attack...

Re:hrm, somethings amiss, me thinks by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-29 13:42 · Score: 0 · on Itanium Problems

Date: Thu, 22 Jun 2000 19:07:43 -0500 (CDT)

From: kimberly w.

Subject: your pic

Your site rocks. Screw all of the assholes who can't take a fucking joke. Don't take it down unless you got something better. Please get that man some cream or something. Goatse.cx forever.

People reply to goatse.cx #2 by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-29 13:32 · Score: -1, Offtopic · on Itanium Problems

Date: Wed, 7 Jun 2000 21:56:22 -0400 (EDT)

From: Syntax Error

Subject: uh .. err ..

I noticed you have no positive feedback. Or maybe I read over it :P But anyways. Your site is very informative and edumacational, definitely the best site out there. EH?!? What am I, on crack?!? That site is fucking sick, man!!! I don't even WANNA know how you got those pics!! I almost threw up first time I saw that!!! Um I mean .. only time I saw that!!! It fucking took me hours to even forget I ever saw those pics, then someone brought it up again, and .. Aghhhh just shoot me now!!! And why the hell goatse.cx ?!? I don't see any GOATS on there!!! Do *you*?!?!? Dude if I wanted to look up someone's asshole, I'd do it myself. Now excuse me while I go puke again.

`SyN`

Oh no! by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-29 13:01 · Score: -1, Offtopic · on Itanium Problems

I forgot to use the Preview button! Please don't kill me!

I just threw up by plasticquart · 2002-09-29 04:22 · Score: -1, Troll · on Game Industry goes from Geek to Chic

`
With this post, I'm proposing an official unending moratorium on anything that includes the phrase "Geek to Chic".

That... and I haven't seen a reference to goatse in quite a while, so don't click here

Just remember by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-28 10:18 · Score: 0 · on Motion Simulator for Home Theater

Don't watch this movie or you might end up like This

Just remember by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-28 10:18 · Score: 0 · on Motion Simulator for Home Theater

Don't watch this movie or you might end up like This

Re:OMG BSD WINS!!!!! by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-27 20:12 · Score: 0 · on Overview of the BSDs

Instead, we have this.

Re:META: Please flag PDF-links by vsync64 · 2002-09-27 12:56 · Score: 1 · on O'Reilly Publishing Mac OS X for Unix Geeks

A few minor points:

The Web site isn't supposed to dictate interface. Interface is up to the browser. Web sites consist of text and links. It's up to the user agent to determine how to present the embedded metadata.
That's the point of the status bar. If you find it too difficult to glance at the bottom of the screen, use a browser that lets you reposition the status bar. Or you could hack an existing one.
Obviously you haven't been on Slashdot that long.

Not so. by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-27 10:28 · Score: -1, Troll · on Overview of the BSDs

This girl is available.

Uh-oh, she just got rooted.

*switches to BSD

Re:Princing, pricing, sugarbitch uses XP by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-27 09:15 · Score: -1, Offtopic · on Flirting With Mac OS X

ahahahahhahahahaha this is PRICELESS. the mac zealot uses XP. I KNEW IT. some linux padawan. HAHAHAHHAHAH what a complete, total fucking fag. you are such a little noob. Egenia loli wannabe and she sucks pretty hard, and you aspire to be like that fat greek pork roll. you are such a fucking geek wannbe. LOLing hard. here. dude, im pissing myself mr mac os x using xp. he then staates the obvious. XP is slower then 98. NAW your shitting me tevis? really. you are a fuicking half brain you dumb shit.

Tevis, the troll is back again.
He knows nothing, and cant take people who point out that he knows nothing. So he got 2 of his friends with 5 moderator points to attack a "troll." See, this is how losers like Tevis operate. The censor unpopular people or lines of thinking in order to be right. The pussy fucking bitch can try, he and his fag friends, to suppress criticism, but he will fail. Tevis, you mother fucking Troll fascist jerk, please die. You suck. Also note Tevis knows nothing. Its rather easy to tell. He takes his myopic view of the universe and would actuate legislation based on this view. He is not learned [learn-ed, two syllables, Tevis the fag wouldn't know this word], and he is a fool. Death to you Tevis, a pox on Slashdot, death.

Hi, I'm a fag, and I'm Tevis Money. Nice to blow you. Oh, Simplex 2 Herpes?; I love the puss! YUM! Time for me to go down and get to work.

Re:This could be the end of pussy sugarbitch by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-27 09:12 · Score: -1, Offtopic · on Flirting With Mac OS X

what the fuck are you talking about? what are they going to make a dual laptop or something? the PPC is fucking dead from motorola, so i dont know how the fuck they are going to revamp it. you are a god damn lying troll. try citing your source for when the Ti is going to get revved. You are such a complete fag.

Tevis, the troll is back again.
He knows nothing, and cant take people who point out that he knows nothing. So he got 2 of his friends with 5 moderator points to attack a "troll." See, this is how losers like Tevis operate. The censor unpopular people or lines of thinking in order to be right. The pussy fucking bitch can try, he and his fag friends, to suppress criticism, but he will fail. Tevis, you mother fucking Troll fascist jerk, please die. You suck. Also note Tevis knows nothing. Its rather easy to tell. He takes his myopic view of the universe and would actuate legislation based on this view. He is not learned [learn-ed, two syllables, Tevis the fag wouldn't know this word], and he is a fool. Death to you Tevis, a pox on Slashdot, death.

Hi, I'm a fag, and I'm Tevis Money. Nice to blow you. Oh, Simplex 2 Herpes?; I love the puss! YUM! Time for me to go down and get to work.

Re:Mac Laptops hi there sugarbitch multibutton by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-27 09:05 · Score: -1, Flamebait · on Flirting With Mac OS X

here is a single mouse button single command key asshole from teh realm of mac. you are such a stupid cunt. you have never used anything, you make judgements on the fucking shit ibook or other fucking crap you own and extrapolate to other laptops. death

Tevis, the troll is back again.
He knows nothing, and cant take people who point out that he knows nothing. So he got 2 of his friends with 5 moderator points to attack a "troll." See, this is how losers like Tevis operate. The censor unpopular people or lines of thinking in order to be right. The pussy fucking bitch can try, he and his fag friends, to suppress criticism, but he will fail. Tevis, you mother fucking Troll fascist jerk, please die. You suck. Also note Tevis knows nothing. Its rather easy to tell. He takes his myopic view of the universe and would actuate legislation based on this view. He is not learned [learn-ed, two syllables, Tevis the fag wouldn't know this word], and he is a fool. Death to you Tevis, a pox on Slashdot, death.

Hi, I'm a fag, and I'm Tevis Money. Nice to blow you. Oh, Simplex 2 Herpes?; I love the puss! YUM! Time for me to go down and get to work.

Re:Wait a minute... sugarbitch fag by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-27 09:02 · Score: -1, Flamebait · on Stealware: Kazaa et al Stealing Link Commissions

You still can't spell. You are a fucking idiot. You are missing the fact you a fucking fag. DEATH.

Tevis, the troll is back again.
He knows nothing, and cant take people who point out that he knows nothing. So he got 2 of his friends with 5 moderator points to attack a "troll." See, this is how losers like Tevis operate. The censor unpopular people or lines of thinking in order to be right. The pussy fucking bitch can try, he and his fag friends, to suppress criticism, but he will fail. Tevis, you mother fucking Troll fascist jerk, please die. You suck. Also note Tevis knows nothing. Its rather easy to tell. He takes his myopic view of the universe and would actuate legislation based on this view. He is not learned [learn-ed, two syllables, Tevis the fag wouldn't know this word], and he is a fool. Death to you Tevis, a pox on Slashdot, death.

Hi, I'm a fag, and I'm Tevis Money. Nice to blow you. Oh, Simplex 2 Herpes?; I love the puss! YUM! Time for me to go down and get to work.

pshaw! by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-27 08:48 · Score: 0 · on Overview of the BSDs

You don't use google?

lp by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-27 06:34 · Score: 0 · on User-Mode Linux Merged Into 2.5 Kernel

Last post.

Goatse.

Re:Uhhh by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-26 16:53 · Score: 0 · on Qatsi Trilogy to be Completed

You are a goddamn ass eating retard!!

Why don't you go and toss Rick Austenson's salad, like Michael A Hartman does?!?

your sig by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-26 16:52 · Score: 0 · on What's the Best Server for Home Use?

I think you mean loser. Or maybe you really DO mean you're a looser baby.

Re:I would tell you... by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-26 15:59 · Score: -1, Troll · on Honest Job Sites?

FOAD you goddamn stupid cunt. Go stick your cock in Rick Austenson's ass.

Re:Poppycock by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-26 14:57 · Score: -1, Troll · on Violent Games Good for Kids

You would know about bad parenting, as you still live with you parents, in a trailer park. You also spelled actually wrong twice which means you are as stupid dumb fuck. What's with you lame cliché expression, "Good God?" Are you trying to be sarcastic because your parents are probably more interested in work than you? And ever hear of financial aid. Yes, Tevis, mommie and daddie aren't obliged to pay for your college. And about keeping the house clean, why does mommie and daddy have to do that for you? Cant you clean up after your stupid, stupid fucking self. I am so glad you aren't my kid, you fucking LAME piece of shit.

Tevis, the troll is back again.
He knows nothing, and cant take people who point out that he knows nothing. So he got 2 of his friends with 5 moderator points to attack a "troll." See, this is how losers like Tevis operate. The censor unpopular people or lines of thinking in order to be right. The pussy fucking bitch can try, he and his fag friends, to suppress criticism, but he will fail. Tevis, you mother fucking Troll fascist jerk, please die. You suck. Also note Tevis knows nothing. Its rather easy to tell. He takes his myopic view of the universe and would actuate legislation based on this view. He is not learned [learn-ed, two syllables, Tevis the fag wouldn't know this word], and he is a fool. Death to you Tevis, a pox on Slashdot, death.

Hi, I'm a fag, and I'm Tevis Money. Nice to blow you. Oh, Simplex 2 Herpes?; I love the puss! YUM! Time for me to go down and get to work.

Re:Poppycock by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-26 14:50 · Score: -1, Troll · on Violent Games Good for Kids

Spelled anger wrong. You would know about being isolated, and never getting pussy - you are a gamer lamer too. what level is your fag wizard on EQ? RPG fag who writes lame shit stories.

Tevis, the troll is back again.
He knows nothing, and cant take people who point out that he knows nothing. So he got 2 of his friends with 5 moderator points to attack a "troll." See, this is how losers like Tevis operate. The censor unpopular people or lines of thinking in order to be right. The pussy fucking bitch can try, he and his fag friends, to suppress criticism, but he will fail. Tevis, you mother fucking Troll fascist jerk, please die. You suck. Also note Tevis knows nothing. Its rather easy to tell. He takes his myopic view of the universe and would actuate legislation based on this view. He is not learned [learn-ed, two syllables, Tevis the fag wouldn't know this word], and he is a fool. Death to you Tevis, a pox on Slashdot, death.

Hi, I'm a fag, and I'm Tevis Money. Nice to blow you. Oh, Simplex 2 Herpes?; I love the puss! YUM! Time for me to go down and get to work.

Re:So that's what's wrong with me by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-26 09:26 · Score: -1, Troll · on Violent Games Good for Kids

What is wrong with you is that you have perverse sexual fantasies about Rick Austenson!!

I GOT YOUR PROFIT RIGHT HERE!! by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-26 08:45 · Score: 0 · on New Scientist: Venus' Atmosphere Implies Life

Repeat the same fucking lame-as-hell joke over and over again.
Meet the "IF I EVER MEET YOU, I WILL KICK YOUR ASS!!" guy.
Get ass kicked so hard it looks like this.
Find out that all your base are belong to repo man.
Have cross-dressing Natalie Portman impersonator pour hot grits down your pants.
Lose consciousness.
Have dream where Bill Gates hands you a copy of OT III and explains that the "moon" and "American Indians" are absurd liberal myths.
Wake up naked in a bathtub full of ice, petrified by the cold.
???
Sell extra pain medication for a PROFIT!

Link by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-26 06:32 · Score: -1, Troll · on That Link Is Illegal

link

Shouldn't this link by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-26 06:21 · Score: -1, Offtopic · on That Link Is Illegal

be illegal?

Re:relax.... by neal+n+bob · 2002-09-26 06:20 · Score: -1 · on That Link Is Illegal

this FP is illegal without this link

Re:Good job folks by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-26 04:01 · Score: 0 · on RC5-64 Success

If he's Rusty, then who's this?

Re:fp for 99 cents by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-26 03:18 · Score: 0 · on Why Does Software Cost So Much?

you can find the deposit hole right here. ;)

Re:SWITCH.... by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-25 23:43 · Score: -1, Flamebait · on Flirting With Mac OS X

My name is cmdrTaco
I run a leanding linux news site.
linux for x86 is getting killed by palladium
So I switched to Mac

No by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-25 22:53 · Score: 0 · on New Scientist: Venus' Atmosphere Implies Life

Slashdot is from Uranus

Slashcode has more holes than a gook brothel. by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-25 19:59 · Score: -1, Offtopic · on New Scientist: Venus' Atmosphere Implies Life

Fuck Slashcode!!! What the hell is with the redirecting back to the home page when I want to read the comments in a story? Good thing I'm not a subscriber or else some heads would be rolling. Damn you Taco. DAMN YOU TO HELL!!

Re:APSL takes away rights by GhostseTroll · 2002-09-25 11:37 · Score: -1 · on Apple Releases Rendezvous As Open Source

A professor at the University of Mississippi is giving a
lecture on the supernatural. To get a feel for his
audience, he asks: "How many people here believe in
ghostses?" About 90 students raise their hands.

"Well, that's a good start. Out of those of you who
believe in ghostses, do any of you think you've ever seen
a ghostse?" About 40 students raise their hands.

"That's really good. Has anyone here ever talked to a
ghostse?" 15 students raise their hands.

"That's great. Has anyone here ever touched a ghostse?" 3
students raise their hands.

"That's fantastic. But let me ask you one question
further... Have any of you ever made love to a ghostse?"
One student way in the back raises his hand.

The professor is astonished and says, "Son, in all the
years I've been giving this lecture, no one has ever
claimed to have slept with a ghostse. You've got to come
up here and tell us about your experience."

The redneck student replies with a nod and a grin, and
begins to make his way up to the podium. The professor
says, "Well, tell us what it's like to have sex with
ghostse."

The student replies, "Ghostse?!? From ah-way back there ah
thought yuh said "goatse."

Re:Macintosh homos by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-25 11:29 · Score: 0 · on Mandrake 9.0 (Dolphin) Is Available [updated]

Why don't you post a link? That always gets noticed here.

I am Chris Sologuk and I am gay !! by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-25 10:37 · Score: -1, Troll · on Mandrake 9.0 (Dolphin) Is Available [updated]

yo
yo
yo
!!
I am Chris Sologuk and I am gay
!!
I use Mandrake :o
My nick on IRC is GuK
!!
Dam Debian sucks
!!
I like the way lil' boys feel
!!
goatse.cx
What's that? You ask if I'll ever switch to a real OS?
NEVAR
!!

Re:Another Alternative Hi HIV/AIDS sugarbitch. by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-25 09:02 · Score: -1, Troll · on Pentium-Based Macs The Future of Apple?

Hi, I'm a fag, and I'm Tevis Money. Nice to blow you. Oh, Simplex 2 Herpes?; I love the puss! YUM! Time for me to go down and get to work.

Linux is dying :) by microsoft.CLIT · 2002-09-25 06:46 · Score: -1 · on Ballmer Wants to "Stomp Linux" Using MS community

Shouldn't be too hard. I mean look at the irony of this IIS is secure whereas Apache has a huge gaping hole that is being exploited.
With the advent of W2K lunix no longer leads in stability.
(L)oserUNIX aka lunix is now even playing second fiddle to OSX because they have native support for good games and applications like photoshop and dreamweaver.
Face it lunix is dying and even *BSD has greater market share thanks to all the BSDs and OSX.

Re:Ignores the wiki by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-25 05:18 · Score: -1, Troll · on A Guide to Building Secure Web Applications

Fuck you and your stupid "wikipedia" toy. Maybe when you geeks can create something that ADULTS wouldn't mind saying, you might win some mindshare.

Hint: Names like OGG, WIKIPEDIA, and GNU/ANYTHING aren't working. So please gently rim my aszho)l3.

Arseman by The+Original+Yama · 2002-09-25 01:32 · Score: 0, Troll · on Public Domain Superheroes?

I don't see a (c) on the Arseman. Does that mean we all own a bit of his arse?

Your a fag, right? by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-25 01:31 · Score: -1, Offtopic · on Public Domain Superheroes?

Your a fag, right?

Fag.

yo, tevis money fucks ass. moneyt by Anonymous Coward · 2002-09-24 22:13 · Score: -1, Offtopic · on LindowsOS Will Bundle AOL Client

Hi, I'm a fag, and I'm Tevis Money. Nice to blow you. Oh, Simplex 2 Herpes?; I love the puss! YUM! Time for me to go down and get to work.

Slashdot Mirror

Domain: goatse.cx

Comments · 12,559