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You appreciate Phantom Menace? You have GOT to check out this epic takedown of the Phantom Menace. http://redlettermedia.com/plin...

Presumably you also dislike all critics because they seek to change the content of your games/movies by pointing out things that suck about them. All criticism is an attack that is trying to ram ideology down your throat.

Face it, you actually hate freedom of speech when people say things you disagree with.

As a true feminist, let me see if I can point out the difference. Posting a takedown of Star Wars Episode 1 that rips it to shreds and belittles everything about it: legitimate exercise of free speech. Even if you love Jar-Jar and midichlorians. Even if they use obscene language and offensive humor.

Petitioning the government to pass new laws outlawing Star Wars or instituting Sci-fi review boards that will monitor and approve the content of such movies: not a legitimate exercise of free speech. Even if you use the language of academics and intellectuals while doing so. (legitimate in this case being a stand-in for "morally acceptable" or "compatible with freedom of speech", not a synonym for "speech that should be banned by the government")

Zero Punctuation from The Escapist and Ben Croshaw is fucking hilarious - these are short, fast paced game reviews done in flash animation if you're not familiar.

Red Letter Media for Half in the Bag, Best of the Worst, and of course Mr. Plinkett. These are movie reviews, commentary and sometimes satire from movie buffs. The most well known (and the reason I still regularly check back) are the scathing several hours long multi-part dissections of the Star Wars Prequels there are some for a few other things as well but the eloquence and insight in the Star Wars Prequel diatribes is really something spectacular and worth watching (it will put in to words what you probably felt).

Even further removed from blogs... Rifftrax and Cinematic Titanic where two different ventures from the cast of Mystery Science Theater 3000 continue doing what they did sans puppets. I prefer Rifftrax of the 2, and collect them both.

Zero Punctuation from The Escapist and Ben Croshaw is fucking hilarious - these are short, fast paced game reviews done in flash animation if you're not familiar.

Red Letter Media for Half in the Bag, Best of the Worst, and of course Mr. Plinkett. These are movie reviews, commentary and sometimes satire from movie buffs. The most well known (and the reason I still regularly check back) are the scathing several hours long multi-part dissections of the Star Wars Prequels there are some for a few other things as well but the eloquence and insight in the Star Wars Prequel diatribes is really something spectacular and worth watching (it will put in to words what you probably felt).

Even further removed from blogs... Rifftrax and Cinematic Titanic where two different ventures from the cast of Mystery Science Theater 3000 continue doing what they did sans puppets. I prefer Rifftrax of the 2, and collect them both.

Go to Red Letter Media (of the Mr. Plinkett Star Wars prequels reviews fame) and check out their Best of The Worst episodes.

Or just check out the Things review.

Battlefield Earth is Oscar-worthy compared to some schlock out there.

Go to Red Letter Media (of the Mr. Plinkett Star Wars prequels reviews fame) and check out their Best of The Worst episodes.

Or just check out the Things review.

Battlefield Earth is Oscar-worthy compared to some schlock out there.

Go to Red Letter Media (of the Mr. Plinkett Star Wars prequels reviews fame) and check out their Best of The Worst episodes.

Or just check out the Things review.

Battlefield Earth is Oscar-worthy compared to some schlock out there.

To my mind, the difference is clear. It's Lucas.

I agree. I felt so sorry for Natalie Portman in Episode III. "Oh Ani! YOU'RE BREAKING MY HEART!" Seriously. I cringe. That is no one but the director.

Watch Natalie Portman in Black Swan. She is utterly brilliant.

Not that I hate Star Wars. Far from it. The broad story arcs echo many ancient myths and stories. George Lucas has said that he read Joseph Campbell's "Hero with a Thousand Faces" which surveys many ancient myths for commonality. The idea of a young boy escaping his mundane life to find his "hero's journey" is primal, as is the story of a son of facing the sins of his father. In my mind these things elevate Star Wars into the pantheon of cinema, in spite of the horrific dialog.

http://redlettermedia.com/plin...

Have you seen Mr Plinkett[1] pick the originals apart? While the presentation is a bit weird, though funny if you like that kind of thing, his points are spot on and overall does a very good job of explaining why the originals were considerably better than the prequels.

[1] http://redlettermedia.com/plin...

First Contact sucked. Hate to say it because I'm a TNG fan but it's the sad truth. It was 90% dumbed down action movie and 10% (the final scene with First Contact) Trek.

I was mostly going for the cheap laugh though. :) Everyone knows the theory of even numbered Trek releases...

That one sucked too, when you stop and think about it.....

First Contact sucked too. I hate to admit that, because TNG was my favorite show, but it did.

This guy says it better than I can.

Sitting here, watching it, I'm reminded of how awesome the trailer was for Episode 1 a long time ago and the reaction it got.

Quite so. OTOH, the Red Letter Media reviews (longer than the movies) were great. I hereby coin:

Plinkett's Law: The entertainment value of a Star Wars/Trek movie plus the entertainment value of the corresponding Plinkett review is constant.

all of this media that has already ruined the next Star Wars movie.

The only thing that has ruined a Star Wars movie is George Lucas.

http://redlettermedia.com/plin... - the best ever deconstructions of Star Wars that are more entertaining than those movies ever were.

Watch and learn, Grasshopper.

For a shorter version:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?...

--
BMO

There was nothing wrong with TNG the television show, particularly after it found its footing and stopped trying to emulate its predecessor. The movies on the other hand.... First Contact and Nemesis were just dumbed down dark action movies. Generations ranks was one of the most insulting movies ever made. Ironically, Insurrection, which was generally panned, was the closest they got to capturing the feel of the television show. Of course, even that one collapsed under the weight of its plot contrivances and couldn't resist the temptation to dip into action movie cliches. Here's a hint Rick Berman: Jean-Luc Picard != John McClane.

Random list of TNG episodes that were way better than any the movies: The Most Toys, Who Watches the Watchers, The Survivors, The Defector, The Measure of a Man, The Wounded, First Contact (the episode, not the movie), The Drumhead, Power Play, and Sarek. That's without going to the crown jewels of TNG, imagine Yesterday's Enterprise or The Best of Both Worlds if produced with a feature film budget. Actually, perhaps it's better that we don't, because they probably would have found a way to fuck them up.

Everything that came after All Good Things was just a bad nightmare.

There was nothing wrong with TNG the television show, particularly after it found its footing and stopped trying to emulate its predecessor. The movies on the other hand.... First Contact and Nemesis were just dumbed down dark action movies. Generations ranks was one of the most insulting movies ever made. Ironically, Insurrection, which was generally panned, was the closest they got to capturing the feel of the television show. Of course, even that one collapsed under the weight of its plot contrivances and couldn't resist the temptation to dip into action movie cliches. Here's a hint Rick Berman: Jean-Luc Picard != John McClane.

Random list of TNG episodes that were way better than any the movies: The Most Toys, Who Watches the Watchers, The Survivors, The Defector, The Measure of a Man, The Wounded, First Contact (the episode, not the movie), The Drumhead, Power Play, and Sarek. That's without going to the crown jewels of TNG, imagine Yesterday's Enterprise or The Best of Both Worlds if produced with a feature film budget. Actually, perhaps it's better that we don't, because they probably would have found a way to fuck them up.

Everything that came after All Good Things was just a bad nightmare.

I'm disappointed that I didn't find a decent rebuttal to this to mod up, and I'm not going to mod you down for having an opinion that I disagree with, so I guess I'll respond.

The original Star Wars movies were great films on their own. They weren't deep or life-changing, but they were good movies in the same way that, say, Starship Troopers was a good movie. They told an interesting and entertaining story, had a powerful emotional impact, and had characters whose motivations you understood and who you cared about. Moreover, they were mostly internally consistent and largely made sense: I don't remember any moments in Star Wars where I thought "why are we here? what are we doing?" There was always a clear goal that the characters were working toward and tension arose when things got in the way. It was a good experience. It was no 2001, but to credit it all to "oh, you were just a kid, that's why you liked it" is just wrong. Remember that many adults loved the movies, too.

The problem with the prequels was... well, perhaps a serial killer can do a better job of explaining that one.

If you actually want an explanation why they're bad movies, I'd suggest red letter media's star wars reviews.

Link to the first one:
http://redlettermedia.com/plinkett/star-wars/star-wars-episode-1-the-phantom-menace/

This "you just liked it cause nostalgia" BS needs to die.

These reviews take about an hour for each film describing in detail just how dreadful the prequels are. Very insightful and well worth watching.

"...Marty McFly, Johnny Rico, and Kevin Bacon."

He does a few others, I think all the star trek tng and later movies too.

The official site is:
http://redlettermedia.com/category/plinkett-reviews/

click the "Mr Plinkett" dropdown

More like rule #1, and it is illustrated ingeniously in Mr Plinkett's epic 70-minute Episode I review.
The aforementioned review is also widely accepted as the best thing to come out of the wreck that is SW: Episode I.

Perhaps most remarkably, Into Darkness is not even the first weird amalgam of The Wrath of Khan and The Undiscovered Country in the Star Trek film catalogue; that honour belongs to Nemesis .

Nemesis ranks up there with the last Matrix movie though. It was horrible.

Wrath of Khan is probably the most memorable moment of the entire franchise's universe. My point was, Star Trek wasn't turned into war operas by anything recent. It's been that way ever since it had a 2 hour format.

Perhaps most remarkably, Into Darkness is not even the first weird amalgam of The Wrath of Khan and The Undiscovered Country in the Star Trek film catalogue; that honour belongs to Nemesis .

1. The setting must be gritty. Star Wars needs to happen in the "frontier," and city settings and government intrigue are an anathema. (Apparently no one's ever set foot on the Death Star or Cloud City.)

2. Technology must be old. Shiny things are right out. (Again, apparently neither the Death Star nor Cloud City exist.)

3. The Force must remain mysterious. Ooh, mystery.

4. Cute things are bad. Gungans are right out. As is Anakin Skywalker. (Ewoks are okay though?)

...Basically, it's a load of nostalgia and action-flick obsession, and the letter's authors will be perfectly fine if the new Star Wars movies are indistinguishable from JJ Abrams's cookie-cutter take on Star Trek. Importantly, the authors completely failed to touch on any of the prequel trilogy's technical flaws—y'know, the incoherent plot, the stilted dialogue, the terrible directing, the miserable editing, the textbook cinematography. For anyone actually interested in understanding what's wrong with the prequel films, watch the Plinkett reviews of the three movies; there's some remarkable footage buried in there of the exact moment when George Lucas realized he had produced a heap of garbage called Episode I.

>but the better ones are about the story (ie, Lord of the Rings/Hobbit/etc).

You mean a sleep-inducing walk, talk, walk some more, talk, walk some more, talk, walk even more, talk more movie?

>much more to the effects

There was supposed to be a Star Trek reboot movie, but it really should have been called Lens Flare.

Actual good movies out of Hollywood are few and far between. Sturgeon's Law applies. Sometimes the reviews are much more entertaining than the movies themselves.

Like the reviews of the "new" Star Wars movies.

http://redlettermedia.com/plinkett/star-wars/

--
BMO

I was talking about Cowboys and Aliens

The "Huh?" per minute rate in Prometheus is rather high. "Why does David poison Holloway?" is probably my first question...

I've heard some talentless hack did a boring, nonsensical spin-off series that's very loosely based on the real ones.

Anyone want a pizza roll?

Plinkett Reviews: Revenge of the Sith

"This was like going to an autopsy... You know it’s dead and nothing’s gonna change that, but you gotta do an autopsy to find out what killed it. Or who killed it.”
http://redlettermedia.com/plinkett/star-wars/star-wars-episode-iii-revenge-of-the-sith/

If you have a few hours to kill, Red Letter Media has an awesome review of Episodes I-III. The review of Episode I is fantastic, and very poignant. http://redlettermedia.com/plinkett/star-wars/

a few scenes with horrid directing/bad acting

Uhm, but isn't that all of them?

These reviews basically scientifically prove how much the prequels suck: http://redlettermedia.com/plinkett/star-wars/

Mr Plinkett explains it all so much more succinctly than I could:

http://redlettermedia.com/plinkett/star-wars/star-wars-episode-ii-attack-of-the-clones/

Part 3, from 3:35. Enjoy! :)

On the off chance someone here hasn't seen these already:

http://redlettermedia.com/plinkett/star-wars/

Lucas couldn't tell a coherent story if he was only given one good one to choose from. Instead, his cadre of yes-men are probably who's responsible for the egotistical results of eps 1-3. Not satisfied with telling just 1 or 2 good stories in each movie, he decided to tell 5-10 in 2+hrs & totally confuse the audience, while losing all continuity, character development/association & compelling storyline, thus alienating the viewer totally. Then he packed in as many OTT light-saber fights & action sequences as he could cram into 24fps film lol! It's like he looked at all the core rules/principles of good story telling over the last 100 years of movie-making (& written works going 100s of years further back) & decided to not just throw them out completely, but do something totally *different* in all the possible different ways, just to be...well, different!

Mr Plinkett does a far better expose of the madness than I ever could, so please, enjoy the ride if you haven't watched his reviews before boyz n girlz! ;)

a re-imagining of the first three episodes (most recently made movies) that still haunt my every thought of a galaxy far away...

As disturbing as it is to think what could happen to the franchise, its far less disturbing knowing that jaded old Mr. Lucas wont be behind it. Episodes I-III were a mockery of film making and I really have to agree with Plinkett .

Thinking about it, I'm not even sure who I would trust to continue or re-imagine the series...maybe Peter Jackson?

So many flaws, check the Plinkett review for a full chewing up. But one glaring issue for me was the Kobayashi Maru test. As you may know, it's supposed to be a no-win situation: a civilian starship is stranded in the Klingon neutral zone, to attempt rescue will cause the klingons to attack, not to attempt rescue will mean their crew will die. In the novel "The Kobayashi Maru" by Julia Ecklar, Kirk reprograms the simulation so the Klingons will fear him and assist with the rescue instead of attacking; he justifies it by the fact that he expects to get such a reputation in the future. In the movie, he simply reprograms it so that the Klingon ships will lose shields and be easily destroyed. So, one is a clever hacker with a huge ego and the balls to back it up; the other just entered a cheat code.

Before doing something catastrophic, like making them watch one of the new movies, watch this: http://redlettermedia.com/plinkett/star-trek/star-trek-first-contact/

DO NOT SHOW THEM ANY OF THE NEW STAR TREK MOVIES. PERIOD.

If you want to show them movies, show them the good ones from TOS.

'Since Star Wars takes place in a fantasy world, the characters need to be identifiable so that the audience can connect to them,' says Star Wars creator George Lucas.

Dear Mr. Lucas,

Please tell this to whomever wrote and directed episodes 1, 2, 3. A lack of identifiable characters the audience can connect with was one of the biggest problems. Please refer that guy to Plinkett's reviews and this guy, who point this out, quite clearly.

In fact, you might consider firing that "director/writer" guy you've got, and finding talents like you did when you hired Lawrence Kasdan, Leigh Brackett and Irvin Kershner to write and direct Empire Strikes Back. Their story still holds up many years after the special effects have become dated. Lawrence Kasdan is still alive. Maybe he knows some good people. Maybe they could do a re-imagining of 1, 2, 3 that would actually be watchable.

But who thinks this is a GOOD idea? anyone? Bueller? I am starting to think that some of these "geniuses" are nothing but VERY lucky hacks. take George Lucas, did you know he wanted to make Indy 3 in a haunted house? or make C3P0 a slimy used car salesman in the original Star Wars? Or that Luke's original name was something like "Rex Starkiller"? I have a feeling these guys are just hacks that luck out in they get people to work with them that take the one or two good germs of ideas they have and get rid of all the schlock and shape it into something good. Problem is when Lucas became rich and famous he got rid of those that said 'That's a fucking stupid idea George" and replaced them with yes men and then you get The Phantom Menace.

While I'm sure most here have seen them for the few that haven't watch the the Plinkett reviews and pay close attention to the looks on the faces of those around him during the behind the scenes. George will come up with some lame idea and they just smile or let out a really half ass fake laugh and you can see if you look at their eyes they are thinking "WTF? why isn't anyone saying anything? this is a joke, right? Are we being punked?" but nobody has the balls to say anything. I bet Bay is the same way, I bet he could announce that 'Here is the setup, the TMNT are created when Donald Trump gets exposed to radioactive lettuce which gives him a MASSIVE case of the runs and the shit travels through the pipes (which we'll follow with 3D camera work) where it lands in a sewer pipe on some pet store turtles that were flushed down a different crapper, its brilliant!" and everyone gets a queasy look and goes "Wow, that is a great idea Michael, you're the best!"

Dude watch this movie review to get a taste of the future. yes its a bad movie but that's not the point, the point is its pretty much a 2 and a half hour commercial with a plot loosely woven around it. the main character uses a VIAO laptop and desktop while talking on his Sony phone and carries his Sony MP3 player while going on a Royal Caribbean Cruise (complete with long pan shot to show off the boat) while drinking his Pepto Bismal while talking about the Dunkin Donuts account. We're not just talking product placement here friend, we are talking about full blown commercials woven into the movie so you are bombarded with what is obviously product shilling.

If you haven't watched the Plinkett review of ST VIII then i highly recommend it. I always wondered why i never really cared for the ST:TNG movies when the TV show was one of my absolute favorites and then Plinkett said something that was like a light bulb for me "There are two Picards". You see in the series Picard was smart and thoughtful, and stuck to his beliefs, more of a chessmaster than Kirk's poker player, yet in the movies he's this angry emotional hothead that is quick to act with little to no thought or regard for those around him. the movie Kirk and the TV Kirk are pretty much the same guy, he was always "Meh, we'll wing it" but Picard thought more about the big picture. The example Plinkett gave was in the series he was given a chance to completely wipe out the Borg AFTER he had been assimilated, yet he refused because it would be genocide yet in First Contact they have him practically foaming at the mouth for the blood of the borg. For me that explained completely why I hated the TNG movies yet couldn't figure out why, its because all the characters play against type and pass around the idiot ball just so they can squeeze more action in.

The ONLY way the Matrix trilogy could be saved is if the fan theory was true and Neo never left the Matrix. then instead of some lame electro jesus it would be a royal mindfuck where the machines, realizing that a percentage would never accept the construct, created a much worse "real world" to give them something they could believe.

Can you imagine if one of the machines popped into Zion at the end of the third and simply told them" you are suffering and living like this because this is what you wanted. You poisoned the planet so badly during the war it is simply unfit for life. We first tried to give you paradise, that failed. We then tried to give you the height of your civilization, but you rejected it, so we had only the choice of creating this "hell world" or killing you and we chose what we thought would be more humane. sorry if it doesn't make you happy but this is all you would accept, a world of suffering".

Now THAT would have been a truly awesome ending that would have left you seriously wondering about big questions like whether man could accept a true paradise. as for the prequels? I'd say Plinkett nailed it and anybody who hasn't watched these videos really needs to. he points out thing I never noticed...but my brain did, like how lazy Lucas had gotten with the "over over two shot" like on soap operas, just so he could do everything in front of green screens. he points out in great detail the incredible fail that is the prequels, how they even butcher their own mythology just so Lucas can throw more shit at the screen and do more CGI. BTW watch his review of the last indy flick and you'll find out how big a hack Lucas really is. Did you know he wanted to set indy 3 in a fricking haunted house? You listen to what his original ideas for indy and Star Wars were and you think "ZOMFG, what is he insane?" and then you realize the ONLY reason he ever made anything good was people willing to stand up and say "George that just doesn't work" but now he's so rich nobody will stand up to him and this is what happens.

And Yoda who uses "anime action hero FUCK PHYSICS" style.

Let's not forget this droid-wannabe. He could, uh, spin his lightsaber "collection" really fast...

Oblig. Plinkett.

http://redlettermedia.com/plinkett/star-wars/star-wars-episode-1-the-phantom-menace/

The light saber fights in the first 3 (eps 4,5,6) were clunky and slow and looked planned. It looks like they rehearsed once and then filmed.

Then you properly observed AS INTENDED but failed to understand its meaning. At this point Vader is supposed to be old and used up, more machine than man. Obi is an old man. Both are shells of their former glory. And as Vader even said, the student has become the master. What you saw was completely by intent. You just failed to understand what it very clearly communicated; especially in light of the wire-fu stuff presented in episodes 1, 2, and 3.

Such story telling is but one of endless examples of why 4, 5, and 6 are examples of good story telling and 1, 2, and 3 are examples of students who flunk out of film school.

Well, in the case of 'Wolverine', when I got around to watching the finished film on DVD I wasn't really too enamored with it. I just didn't care for the movie when it was a "serious" film, but the workprint was both hysterical and fascinating to me. It's not that I dislike the character or comic book movies or anything, I've generally enjoyed Iron Man, Ang Lee's Hulk (Apparently I'm in the minority on that one, and I hated the Ed Norton sequel), Thor, The X-Men films, etc. The Wolverine movie was just boring to me in some way I can't put my finger on.

I guess it's like what Plinkett said in his now legendary review of Star Wars: Episode 1. Paraphrasing: "[on the subject of the original trilogy 'Special Editions'] This is why I found the Special Editions so goddamned offensive. It's like George Lucas just shoved as much crap into every frame as he could. It doesn't accomplish anything but distract you, like a child waving his arms in front of you yelling 'look at me!'" During this section of the review, he cuts to the scene from the redone A New Hope where Luke and Obi Wan are cruising into Mos Eisley in the land speeder just before the "These are not the droids you're looking for" scene and it's totally ridiculous in a way I hadn't consciously thought about before with those films. It's not immersive, it's totally distracting and detrimental, and puts into words one of the things I didn't like about them (or the prequel trilogy) that I wasn't able to put my finger on. I felt much the same way about the Transformers series of films, there was almost too much insanity and shit going on all the time that I wasn't intrigued, I was fucking bored.

I don't know, maybe I'm just of the wrong generation to appreciate the flash over the substance. I love good special effects, but not to the detriment of the story, and what we have today hardly passes as good anymore, in my opinion. I'm far more drawn in by the dated techniques of yesteryear like the Ray Harryhausen work in Sinbad or Jason and the Argonauts. For instance, my favorite movie dragon, of all time, was Vermithrax Pejorative, of the awesome, cult film Dragonslayer. Nothing since compares, and Dragonslayer came out 30 years ago. It gives me hope that Peter Jackson is looking to Dragonslayer as his inspiration in creating the dragon Smaug in The Hobbit.

Maybe it's the uncanny valley? Even early CGI, such as what we see on films like Jurassic Park, seemed far more realistic to me than most anything that's come out within the last decade.

If you have not already, then Red Letter Media's reviews of Star Wars are a must. He makes it painfully clear Lucas has DESTROYED the Star Was franchise. In fact, if he were a film student with episodes I, II, and II, he would have not only flunked, by likely been kicked out of school is disgrace before he could have finished II and II.

Honestly, and in all sincerity, I seriously doubt anyone with any serious movie pedigree could do worse than Lucas has done. Lucas's Star Wars efforts are literally shameful and disgusting.

This topic has been getting a lot of attention recently. The guys at Red Letter Media just interviewed the director of the movie The People vs. George Lucas which examines the question in detail.

I could have eaten a bowl of alphabet soup and shat a better plot than that.

Actually, 1-3 literally have no plot. They are just a combination of random, usually conflicting and confusing words, and images.

Don't believe me? Check these out. The narrative voice is annoying as all hell, and the reviews are very long, but he does an absolutely wonderful job of analyzing those "movies." Literally, they have no plot. If a film student were to produce that shit, they would be ejected from school.

I could have eaten a bowl of alphabet soup and shat a better plot than that.

Actually, 1-3 literally have no plot. They are just a combination of random, usually conflicting and confusing words, and images.

Don't believe me? Check these out. The narrative voice is annoying as all hell, and the reviews are very long, but he does an absolutely wonderful job of analyzing those "movies." Literally, they have no plot. If a film student were to produce that shit, they would be ejected from school.