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People with real l337 speak names?

An anonymous reader writes "I'm considering naming my first-born child either Br4d or J4n37, depending on gender. My wife isn't too keen on the idea but there's plenty of time left to persuade her. Anyway, it had me wondering whether there are any people out there with real l337 speak given names (or even just a digit in their name). Do you know of any? Other than people saying your dad is a l4m3r, What are the possible pitfalls of having a digit in your name? Is it legal to have a digit in a name? Am I guaranteeing my child becomes a misfit? Am I the misfit?" Ask Jennifer 8. Lee.

142 of 1,441 comments (clear)

  1. oy by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Yeah, I'm going to name my first born son fr1st p50t!!11

    1. Re:oy by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      Seriously. Name your child FORTRAN. Absolutly *no one* will screw with a kid named FORTRAN. Most bad ass name in history. Peroid.

    2. Re:oy by notque · · Score: 2, Funny

      All I want is at least one Evil bit post. That's it.

      --
      http://use.perl.org
    3. Re:oy by Otter · · Score: 5, Funny
      Oh I dunno, I am fairly hot for someone with a Greek letter / Physics symbol as a middle name...

      Dude, there's a whole country full of people whose full names are spelled entirely with Greek letters!

    4. Re:oy by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      Dude, there's a whole country full of people whose full names are spelled entirely with Greek letters!

      Yeah, I saw that Star Trek episode, too...

    5. Re:oy by dasmegabyte · · Score: 4, Funny

      I'm naming my first born "omg new baby ^_^"

      --
      Hey freaks: now you're ju
    6. Re:oy by Trigun · · Score: 2, Informative

      +42, but you really have to know what you're doing to get that one.

    7. Re:oy by Fnkmaster · · Score: 5, Funny

      How about naming your baby "Oops"?

    8. Re:oy by Ateryx · · Score: 4, Funny
      I'm an admin for a underground filesharing hub at a major midwest campus, and while registering people I came across a kid whose name was ______ McLeet.


      It looks like while some people learn to be leet, others are just born that way.

      --
      "The truth suffers from too much analysis"
    9. Re:oy by ArsonSmith · · Score: 2, Funny

      self forfilling post

      --
      Paying taxes to buy civilization is like paying a hooker to buy love.
    10. Re:oy by cayenne8 · · Score: 2, Funny
      Gonna name mine 'Houdini'.....

      For somehow managing to escape that damned rubber.....

      --
      Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.........
    11. Re:oy by Mr.+Piddle · · Score: 4, Funny


      What about Asskickotron the Destroyer?

      --
      Vote in November. You won't regret it.
    12. Re:oy by Captain+Nitpick · · Score: 3, Funny
      Seriously. Name your child FORTRAN. Absolutly *no one* will screw with a kid named FORTRAN. Most bad ass name in history. Peroid.

      "FORTRAN? Wasn't he the one that turned into a dump truck?"

      --
      But then again, I could be wrong.
    13. Re:oy by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      Let's work on getting laid first, hm?

    14. Re:oy by sg_oneill · · Score: 3, Funny

      I had a friend seriously (admitedly when drunk) claim to be calling his soon-to-be-born kid "Incredible 3D monster".

      Of course he changed his mind when he sobered he said he was just talking about graphics cards.

      So he settled on "Zebulon" for a boys name. Fortunately he got a daughter and mother got to chose the (sensible) name.

      eek.

      --
      Excuse the Unicode crap in my posts. That's an apostrophe, and slashdot is busted.
    15. Re:oy by xSauronx · · Score: 2, Insightful

      you could at least make up that fortran was cultural somehow...what kind of jerk would name their kid in l33t speak is beyond me, but it sounds like a guarantee of therapy down the road for a multitude of reasons.

      --
      By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth. -- George Carlin
    16. Re:oy by VivianC · · Score: 4, Funny

      Almost forgot about Frigga. Nice girl, I spent a whole day teling her what her name means.

      Telling her or showing her? Oh yeah, this is slashdot. Telling her.

      --
      Viv

      Gmail invites for ip
    17. Re:oy by swordboy · · Score: 5, Funny

      Most bad ass name in history.

      Umm... I think that you are forgetting TROGDOR!!!

      --

      Life is the leading cause of death in America.
    18. Re:oy by paxmark1 · · Score: 5, Insightful

      Yeah, why saddle someone with an offensive name. Yes, I know what Frigga means. There was a high school basketball player in Iowa once named Fonda Dicks. That is one cruel father. And in my high school in the 1970's a guy moved into town and was in my class. His dad the Rev. Frost named his son Jack. It is rough enough being a kid. Going through life with a joke is beyond the pale. The original poster needs to get beyond a portion of his persona and start embracing the persona called "DAD". He needs to start embracing another part that is called "partner" and listen to his partner. If he really wants to be cute - he can change his own name to a more geeklike persona. Shalom,

    19. Re:oy by Tired_Blood · · Score: 5, Funny

      I came across a kid whose name was ______ McLeet.

      Well, I'm more impressed that the kid's first name is "______".

      --
      This is not my sig.
    20. Re:oy by SandSpider · · Score: 3, Informative

      Almost forgot about Frigga. Nice girl, I spent a whole day teling her what her name means.

      Yeah, it'd be a pain to be named after the Norse Goddess of Love and Fertility. But you'd think she'd be able to understand that a little easier. Maybe you might want to pick up some mythology books next time, for help.

      =Brian

      --
      There is nothing so good that someone, somewhere, will not hate it.
    21. Re:oy by sherms · · Score: 2, Funny

      Heres one for coffee on your screen I think I'll name my daughter Riaa (Ree ah')

      Although then she will probably get beet up alot by Nerds.

      Sherm

    22. Re:oy by red+floyd · · Score: 5, Funny

      I thought names with two consecutive underscores were reserved?

      --
      The only reason we have the rights we have is that people just like us died to gain those rights. -- Cheerio Boy
    23. Re:oy by red+floyd · · Score: 4, Funny

      I worked for 10 years with a guy named "Dick Bender".

      --
      The only reason we have the rights we have is that people just like us died to gain those rights. -- Cheerio Boy
    24. Re:oy by Old+Wolf · · Score: 5, Funny

      And your second-born, "Oops I did it again"

    25. Re:oy by zerocool^ · · Score: 4, Funny

      Which is funny, because I've tried to convince my wife that we need to get this shirt for little Sean Kevin when he pops out in less than 2 months.

      She said "no" of course, she doesn't want to be pushing a stroller around with a baby with a shirt that says "broken condom".

      So, I just opted for this shirt. I figured "Daddy drinks because I cry" was a little better.

      ~Will

      --
      sig?
    26. Re:oy by pizza_milkshake · · Score: 3, Funny

      That's "Underscore McLeet"

    27. Re:oy by The_dev0 · · Score: 2, Funny

      Absolutely no word of a lie, there is a car dealership in Brisbane, Australia owned/run by a guy called Mike Hunt. If that was your name, wouldn't you prefer to be called Mick or Michael or something?

      --
      Never fight naked, unless you're in prison...
    28. Re:oy by brendan_orr · · Score: 3, Funny

      Could always make a shirt "I fork()'ed with my spouse"

    29. Re:oy by rastos1 · · Score: 2, Funny

      Yeah. I read once about simillar attempt. The guy chose the name "Ford Perfect".

  2. Not a Joke by Merlin42 · · Score: 4, Informative
    1. Re:Not a Joke by ArmenTanzarian · · Score: 5, Funny

      Well, we at least know of one bug in first version: bad naming conventions.

    2. Re:Not a Joke by Flamingcheeze · · Score: 2, Funny

      So if the kid gets a bionic implant, will he then be Jon Cusack 2.1?

      --
      The Philosophy of Liberty | lewrockwell.com
    3. Re:Not a Joke by JonGretar · · Score: 4, Funny

      So the first child with a cyber implant would be Jon Cusack 2.1.2??

      Guess an abortion would be given Jon Cusack 2.1.RC1

  3. That's nothing by JohnGrahamCumming · · Score: 4, Funny

    Imagine having a commonly used pr0n word in your name.

    John.

    1. Re:That's nothing by CptChipJew · · Score: 5, Funny

      "Hi sorry, I apologize, but could you tell me your name again?"

      "Oh God, I'm Cumming!"

      sorry...

      --
      Vonal Declosion
    2. Re:That's nothing by HiredMan · · Score: 5, Funny

      That would suck. No one would be able to find you on any search engine query for all the results.

      Of course, in the future the only way to remain anonymous might be to have a name so common that it can't be filtered from the noise of web page META tags.

      I named my kids "Nude Portman Viagra" and "Spam Nigeria Warez" because if I can't keep them off the grid I can at least make the very, very hard to find.

      =tkk

    3. Re:That's nothing by Garion911 · · Score: 5, Funny

      I recall on usenet year ago, a student, whose school policy was first 6 letters of last name, first initial, last initial..

      Her name was something like Mary Elizabeth Cummings..

      http://groups.google.com/groups?q=cumminme&hl=en &l r=&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8&selm=19990609210912.29320.000 01319%40ng33.aol.com&rnum=3

      --
      Slashdot is like Playboy: I read it for the articles
    4. Re:That's nothing by gnu-generation-one · · Score: 4, Funny

      "That would suck. No one would be able to find you on any search engine query for all the results."

      FBI agent: "We've got the Echelon data on Mr Cumming, sir. Results 1-10 of 413,770,400 are on your screen now. They're mostly emails mentioning his name"

    5. Re:That's nothing by johnkoer · · Score: 5, Funny

      Since the link doesn't work, I think this is whar Garion is referring to:

      Many colleges and business's tend to strip the last name down to 6
      characters and add the first and last initial to either the beginning or end
      to make up an e-mail address..

      For example, Mary L. Ferguson = mlfergus or
      fergusml. They are just now beginning to realize
      the problems that may happen when you have a
      large and diverse pool of people to choose from.

      Add to that a large database of company/college
      Acronyms and you have some very funny addresses.
      Probably not funny to the individual involved, however:

      Top ten actual E-mail Addresses

      10. Hellen Thomas Eatons (Duke University) -
      eatonsht@dku.edu mailto:eatonsht@dku.edu

      9. Mary Ellen Dickinson (Indiana University of Pennsylvania) -
      dickinme@iup.edu mailto:dickinme@iup.edu

      8. Francis Kevin Kissinger (Las Verdes University) -
      kissinfk@lvu.edu mailto:kissinfk@lvu.edu

      7. Amanda Sue Pickering (Purdue University) -
      aspicker@pu.edu mailto:aspicker@pu.edu

      6. Ida Beatrice Ballinger (Ball State University) -
      ibballin@bsu.edu mailto:ibballin@bsu.edu

      5. Bradley Thomas Kissering (Brady Electrical,
      Northern Division, Overton, Canada) -
      btkisser@bendover.com mailto:btkisser@bendover.com

      4. Isabelle Haydon Adcock (Toys "R" Us) -
      ihadcock@tru.com mailto:ihadcock@tru.com

      3. Martha Elizibeth Cummins (Fresno University) -
      cumminme@fu.edu mailto:cumminme@fu.edu

      2. George David Blowmer (Drop Front Drawers & Cabinets Inc.) -
      blowmegd@dropdrawers.com mailto:blowmegd@dropdrawers.com

      but at No 1, it had to be...

      1. Barbara Joan Beeranger (Myplace Home Decorating) -
      beeranbj@myplace.com mailto:beeranbj@myplace.com

    6. Re:That's nothing by Analogy+Man · · Score: 4, Funny

      Straight up my wife went to high school with a Richard Wacker. I understand he lived up to his name too!

      --
      When the people fear their government, there is tyranny; when the government fears the people, there is liberty.
    7. Re:That's nothing by dfung · · Score: 2, Funny

      My junior year roommate in college was Peter Wang. At the end of the year, when we gave out the "house awards", he won "Most Redundant Name".

      I thought he had it bad, but it's nothing compared to you, John.

    8. Re:That's nothing by Ralph+Wiggam · · Score: 2, Funny

      In Indianapolis? I went to high school with his son, Peter Wacker (I'm not kidding). If your name was Richard Wacker, why in the world would you name your kid Peter? I heard Pete changed his name a couple years ago.

      I was in a bar with some friends talking about people we know with goofy names like Peter Wacker and Claire Annette Reed. My friend's gf was being quiet and I asked her what was wrong. She said "Do you know what my name is?" and I said "Mandy" which is all I had ever called her. She informed me that her name was Amanda Mount. Tough break.

      -B

    9. Re:That's nothing by Alkaiser · · Score: 4, Funny

      My sophomore year, UC Irvine went from choose your own UID to First Initial, Middle Initial, 6 letters of last name. Freshmen got them auto-assigned like that.

      I was making a database of club emails, and there was a girl in there named Serena Tan...middle initial, A.

      The school had a policy of allowing you to change something that was blatantly horrible, so she didn't have to bear with "satan@uci.edu" for more than a week or so.

      --
      Netjak.com independent reviews of domestic & import video ga
    10. Re:That's nothing by Snowdog668 · · Score: 2, Funny

      Back when I was in the service we had a new LT come into the unit. At the morning formation they announced the addition of LT. Dick. The whole company lost it. He had his last name legally changed to Dickson. Unfortunately I ended up working for him for about a year and a half and yes, he did live up to his original name. He was a complete wanker with zero people skills.

      --
      I wouldn't say I'm a bad gambler but the last time I went to Vegas I even lost a buck on the soda machine.
    11. Re:That's nothing by reconbot · · Score: 2, Informative

      Since the url does work I figured I'd link to it.

      --
      I'm just this guy, you know?
    12. Re:That's nothing by Webmoth · · Score: 2, Funny

      Teacher in my high school was named Jack Head. Another one named Gaye Wood. My cross country coach was Brad Pinkstaff.

      --
      Give me my freedom, and I'll take care of my own security, thank you.
    13. Re:That's nothing by claes · · Score: 2, Interesting

      In Sweden, Jerker is actually a pretty common name. You don't believe me? Look here

  4. Oh dear fucking god by JoeBaldwin · · Score: 2, Insightful

    As far as April Fools jokes go, this takes the biscuit.

    It's both unfunny and the story makes no sense.

    1. Re:Oh dear fucking god by cK-Gunslinger · · Score: 4, Insightful


      IMHO, the best part of /.'s 04/01 are posts like these. I (and many others) get a real kick out of the whiners and complainers who bitch about "unfunny" posts. Last year was a riot! Not only were the massively-duped stories great, but the bitching was top-notch. I think a few people may have actually left the site permanently!

      Anyway, I've been trying to guess the "theme" for this year's topic and I think perhaps tomorrow that it will be revealed that all these "unfunny" stories are all actually real news/submissions that the mods have been queuing up for a while just for today. But I dunno. I'll just sit back and enjoy the ride.

      Thanks again for you contribution. Cheers!

  5. Potential Problem by PaintyThePirate · · Score: 5, Funny

    One problem would be taking standardized tests such as the SATs. There are no numbers in the section where you bubble in your name. Your child could lose the 400 points given for putting your name on the test...

  6. I think... by j0keralpha · · Score: 2, Insightful

    I think you'll just wind up irreperably harming your child, as when they get to school and interact with kids, they'll be mercilessly made fun of. hey, if you want to be father to the next dylan kleybold, thats up to you, but do it in an isolated area where you will be the only casualty.

    1. Re:I think... by gcaseye6677 · · Score: 2, Insightful

      It wouldn't cause any more ridicule than naming a kid Pubert, which is a name I have actually heard of. But seriously, some people should be arrested for child abuse for coming up with some of these horrendously stupid names.

  7. Ry4an by ry4an · · Score: 4, Informative

    I had my name legally changed to Ry4an 10 years ago. It's worked out fine though most formal records just exclude it.

    1. Re:Ry4an by zsazsa · · Score: 2, Interesting

      I remember a Ry4an Brase on St. Louis BBSes (like the BS Box). There can't be more than one Ry4an out there... is that you?

    2. Re:Ry4an by ry4an · · Score: 2, Informative

      Yeah. Leet wasn't the goal. Hell 10 years ago it wasn't even called leet, but called "hacker" on the BSSes, and that wasn't the goal either.

    3. Re:Ry4an by ry4an · · Score: 2, Informative

      the 4 is silent

    4. Re:Ry4an by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      It's spelled Ry4an but is pronounced Throat Warbler Mangrove.

    5. Re:Ry4an by 7-Vodka · · Score: 3, Interesting

      well, wtf was the goal then?

      --

      Liberty.

    6. Re:Ry4an by ry4an · · Score: 2, Interesting

      Yup that was me. Ran a board called The Zoo and dialed into BSBox, Pinball Palace, and a few others.

  8. let's set some priorities by tanguyr · · Score: 4, Funny

    I'm considering naming my first-born child either Br4d or J4n37, depending on gender. My wife isn't too keen on the idea but there's plenty of time left to persuade her... considering you haven't even met her yet. Now move out of your parent's basement and stop posting April Fool's jokes.

    --
    #!/usr/bin/english
  9. In my family by stoolpigeon · · Score: 5, Funny

    all us boys got unusual names. Makes you tough.

    Sue.

    --
    It's hard to believe that's how Micronians are made. Why don't we see it right now by having you both kiss one another?
    1. Re:In my family by Mr.+Slippery · · Score: 2, Informative
      This is a reference to a song by Johnny Cash in which a boy is named Sue...

      No disrespect to the Man In Black, but it was written by Shel Silverstein.

      See also his "sequel" to it, The Father of the Boy Named Sue.

      --
      Tom Swiss | the infamous tms | my blog
      You cannot wash away blood with blood
  10. The word is "sex" by gtrubetskoy · · Score: 2, Informative
    unless you expect your first-born to be either masculine or feminine. English grammar does not have genders, which is why most people don't realize how screwed up this sounds (because they don't know what the word gender means). In many (most?) other languages words have geneders, e.g. in French a table is of feminine gender and in Russian it's masculine. Gender is purely a grammar term. Confusing the words "gender" and "sex" is equivalent to using "it" when referring to a person.

    I know this is OT, but WTF is the topic today anyway?

    1. Re:The word is "sex" by Fedallah · · Score: 4, Informative

      (because they don't know what the word gender means)

      You mean definition (3a) here?

    2. Re:The word is "sex" by a+hollow+voice · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Gender has more than one proper English usage.

      Gender and sex are generally considered to be two separate (related) topics.

      For those not in a reading mood, your sex generally considered to be what your chromosomes and organs say (assuming they agree, which they don't always), while your gender refers to learned social roles.

  11. Hope this is an April's Fools joke by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Insightful

    But,

    On the off chance it is not then the best thing to do is to change your own name and see how it goes.

    Reserve the stupid name for your second child if you find it so great.

  12. It's not that great... by b12arr0 · · Score: 5, Funny

    My parents named me sc0. They thought they were so cool with their UnixWare server. I'm in therapy now.

    1. Re:It's not that great... by billimad · · Score: 2, Funny

      sorry man but you also owe someone $699 too.

  13. Well ...... by lake2112 · · Score: 2, Funny

    I am going to name my first child :-) . Because he/she will the happiest child in the world with a name like :-)

    1. Re:Well ...... by Captain+Nitpick · · Score: 2, Funny
      I am going to name my first child :-) . Because he/she will the happiest child in the world with a name like :-)
      * Captain Nitpick walks up to the mic.
      Captain Nitpick: *cough*
      Captain Nitpick: That's because he/she will be the only child in the world with a name like that.
      * Captain Nitpick bows and leaves the stage.
      --
      But then again, I could be wrong.
  14. f00lz, ph33r teh l337!! by CharAznable · · Score: 2, Funny

    EyE 4m 51cK of 4pr11 f00lz 570ri3z. tihs 4r71(13 is TEH SUX!!111!!!
    8u7 1n (453 17'5 r34l,
    g0 4 17!!!!
    OMG!!! r0x0r!!11!!! j00 0wnz!!

    --
    The perfect sig is a lot like silence, only louder
  15. Of course you can do it... by LilMikey · · Score: 4, Funny

    ...stupid isn't illegal yet.

    --
    LilMikey.com... I'll stop doing it when you sto
    1. Re:Of course you can do it... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny
      Stupidity will never be outlawed.

      Too many people in office would get arrested.

  16. You are not the misfit... by baudilus · · Score: 3, Funny

    but you are the weakest link. Goodbye!

  17. I don't think this will be very common by MajorBlunder · · Score: 2, Insightful

    considering the fact that most l33t speakers stereotypicaly lack reproductive partners

    --

    "I'm making perfect sense, you're just not keeping up."

  18. Don't do it by billmaly · · Score: 5, Insightful

    OK, April Foole or not, your child deserves a real name, not a gag name or a spoof or your attempt to make a point or to be cute. You've no clue what will become of your child later in life, what path they will take, who they will work and live with. A name is one of few things you have control over in their life, and a bad/goofy name can really impact a child's psyche and who they become. My own father never outgrew the name Jan (old world version of John) and forever held it against his parents. If you need further reference, look at the flack that the musician Prince put up with when he changed his name to an unprononucable symbol. Do you really want people laughing at your kid behind his/her back the rest of their life?

    Name them Robert, Sarah, Bruce, Steve, Karen, Jessica, whatever. Just don't get cute or play games with your kids name. It's too important for you to mess with.

    1. Re:Don't do it by RobertB-DC · · Score: 4, Insightful

      Do you really want people laughing at your kid behind his/her back the rest of their life?

      No fooling: my wife works at a children's hospital, and once had a child come through whose middle name was "Trash". The parent (singlular, of course) was just as caring as you might expect from someone who would do that to her child. In a fair world, a name like that on a birth certificate would be prima facie evidence of child abuse... whether you were thinking along the lines of Boy Named Sue or not.

      --
      Stressed? Me? Of course not. Stress is what a rubber band feels before it breaks, silly.
    2. Re:Don't do it by billmaly · · Score: 2, Interesting

      I'm not ripping on the name Jan, no matter the culture it originates from. Here in the midwestern United States, in the 1950's, boys names Jan were ridiculed for having a girl's name (Jan being the shortened version of Janice). All through grade school, he was assigned to the girls side of things and caught a lot of flak for it. It really weighed heavily on him for the rest of his life. Believe it or not, a lot of folks around here were not too appreciative of someone with what was perceived as a foreign name. That's not right to be sure, but that's what happened.

  19. the Master is having one of his ... *affairs* by senahj · · Score: 5, Funny


    > Br4d
    > J4n37
    Dr. Scott!
    Rocky!

    --
    Wait a minute. Didn't I say that on the other side of the record? I'd better check ...
  20. one of my first CS TAs in college by dcocos · · Score: 4, Interesting

    My first CS TA in college's first name was 'H' he said that it had caused him a lot of problems. In fact I just searched for him on Google and http://www.cs.pitt.edu/%7Ehcl/me/name.html this page explains it.

  21. First use of a number in a name by Chief+Technovelgist · · Score: 2, Interesting
    In 1974, sf author Alfred Bester wrote The Computer Connection. One of the characters was Fee-5 Grauman's Chinese. The "5" was because she was born in the fifth row.

    Any earlier reference to a number in a name in fiction? Not just the idea that your name could be replaced with a number, but a number in a name.

    1. Re:First use of a number in a name by nomadic · · Score: 4, Informative

      It's later, not earlier, but in Asimov's Prelude to Foundation the Mycogenian names contained numbers (i.e. Sunmaster Fourteen).

      In real life it was quite common in ancient Rome to give children numeric names (Quintus, Sextus, etc.).

    2. Re:First use of a number in a name by Gwenna · · Score: 2, Informative

      How about Tom Lehrer's reference to his friend Hen3ry in one of his songs (well, it was the opening to a song, and unfortunately I can't remember which one right now.) I am certain that the friend is either fictitious or that this wasn't his legal name.

      --
      More sugar!
    3. Re:First use of a number in a name by StrongAxe · · Score: 2, Interesting

      In Alfred Bester's novel The Stars, My Destination, there was a colony in which everyone used special symbols in their names to represent groups of letters, such as $ (Buck), S&4d, Br+, Gr/, N8, <ter, C>, W@son, _bara, etc.

  22. You can call me: by Mateito · · Score: 2, Interesting
    Feel free to call me HotLuv4U.

    But serisously f0lks:

    There was a US couple who decided to version number their children. I'm suprised that his wife actually agreed to it.

  23. Re:Potential Problem Non-issue. by grub · · Score: 5, Funny


    Anyone retarded enough to name their kid in l3375p34k lacks the genes that would make higher learning a possibility anyhow.

    --
    Trolling is a art,
  24. Seen it.. once by viniosity · · Score: 3, Informative

    Back in 1999 there was a guy at Apple who's name (as posted outside his cube) was Bo3b. I believe the '3' was silent.

  25. Don't by acomj · · Score: 2, Interesting

    People judge you on your name.

    I know from personal experience.I have a strange name..Aram, Simple but different. . I've had a few people tell me what they were expecting from name someone "with a turban". Or my last name Com jean which some people think as french "you don't speak french???". I'm just a caucasion with some armenian mixed in.

    My name I like, but I'm often pre judged on it. I can't imagine what Dweezle Zappa would go through if his father wasn't so famous.

  26. Real 1337 names by BubbaJonBoy · · Score: 2, Funny

    I have a grandson named Darren Andrew Terrence Anderson - initials D.A.T.A. - after the StarTrek android...
    Does killing two genres with multiple names count?
    Regards,
    BubbaJonBoy

  27. I had a pal years ago... by Samurai+Cat! · · Score: 4, Funny

    ...who went to high school with these two people, brother and sister. The guy's name was Chip, the girl's name was Cookie.

    The dog's name was Chocolate.

    I shit thee not.

    --

    "People" using "unnecessary" quotes should be "shot".
  28. Tom Lehrer already addressed this by Concerned+Onlooker · · Score: 2, Informative
    Tom Lehrer told the story about his "unique" friend who had decided to spell his name Hen3ry. He would just say the 3 is silent.

    --
    http://www.rootstrikers.org/
    1. Re:Tom Lehrer already addressed this by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Informative
      I am reminded at this point of a fellow I used to know whose name was Henry. Only to give you an idea of what an individualist he was, he spelled it H-E-N-3-R-Y. The 3 was silent, you see. Hen3ry was financially independent having inherited his father's tar-and-feather business and was therefore able to devote his full time to such intellectual pursuits as writing. I particularly remember a heartwarming novel of his about a young necrophiliac who finally achieved his boyhood ambition by becoming coroner.

      In addition to writing, he indulged in a good deal of philosophizing. Like so many contemporary philosophers, he especially enjoyed giving helpful advice to people that were happier than he was. One particular bit of advice which I recall -- which is the reason I bring up this whole story -- was something he said once before they took him away to the Massachusetts State Home for the Bewildered. He said, "Life is like a sewer. What you get out of it depends on what you put into it."

      It's always seemed to me that this is precisely the sort of dynamic, positive thinking that we so desperately need today in these trying times of crisis and universal brouhaha. And so with this in mind, I have here a modern, positive, dynamic, uplifting song in the tradition of the great old revival hymns. This one might more accurately be termed a survival hymn.

      It goes like this.

      ("We Will All Go Together When We Go")

  29. 3Jane by nakedjames · · Score: 2, Insightful

    Consider that enigmatic character from William Gibsons "The Sprawl" trilogy.

    Of course she was the second clone of the original Jane Tessier-Ashpool, but hey...

    --
    I don't have a TV now, but that's ok. The shows in my mind are almost ALWAYS better...
  30. Ihope this is an April Fool by HarveyBirdman · · Score: 4, Funny
    I'm considering naming my first-born child either Br4d or J4n37, depending on gender.

    Translation: I hate my child, and wish to see them get beaten regularly in school.

    You don't have another child named Squee, do you?

    --
    --- Ban humanity.
  31. my first born'll be called 904753 by GillBates0 · · Score: 5, Funny
    goatse, darling! can you come here a minute?

    coming dad! (@) *shudder*

    --
    An Indian-American Hindu committed to non-violent thought/speech/action alarmed by the global explosion of radical Islam
  32. My Grandpa is 1337! by RobertB-DC · · Score: 2, Interesting

    The search on "Jennifer 8. Lee" brought back an interesting blog comment: If it's simply the number eight, why does it have a period after it?

    My grandfather's name is A C (let's call him Jonesmith for privacy). When he married my grandmother (first grandpa died before I was born), I thought his name was "Acee", like the local milk company. But his first name is "A", and his middle name is "C". And his full name is A C Jonesmith, not A. C. Jonesmith.

    So the blogger is right -- if her middle name is "8", it should be "Jennifer 8 Lee", no period.

    And my grandpa was 1337 before 1337 was invented.

    --
    Stressed? Me? Of course not. Stress is what a rubber band feels before it breaks, silly.
    1. Re:My Grandpa is 1337! by FortKnox · · Score: 2, Informative

      Aye, just like Harry S Truman (the S didn't stand for anything).

      --
      Good quote, too many chars. Seriously, the slashdot 120 char limit sucks!
  33. How about we all name you '1d10t' by forgetmenot · · Score: 3, Insightful

    This is the ultimate in inconsiderate selfishness. The name you give a child is the name that child is going to be stuck with, at least until they're old enough to change it to something sensible. Children are not 'possessions' or baubles that hang around as a display of your status or in this case you 'geekiness'. Consequently the name you give a child is something very serious and deserving of every bit of consideration you can give it and more. With more idiots like this naming their children in the same way they would name a pet or even a car, I would not be surprised to see more lawsuits in the future by offspring pissed off at their parents for the lifetime of humiliation heaped upon them by these inconsiderate jerkwads who don't deserve the title of 'parent'. You don't think it'll happen? There's already cases of young men suing their parents over being circumcised - a very common practice until recently. A child's name is NOT a joke. Grow the hell up!

    To put it into perspective. "Prince Michael" might not be old enough to care right now, but once he's a young adult, do you think he's really going to appreciate the amount of consideration is self-obsessed ass-wipe of a father gave his name?

  34. Sue by Quill_28 · · Score: 2, Funny

    Is this the modern day version of a boy named sue?

    Yes, I know it's April 1st.

  35. Re:Real 1337 names (obligatory joke) by shadowcabbit · · Score: 2, Funny

    Depending on when the kid watches the Matrix, all he's going to ever hear when he comes home is "Mr. Anderson, welcome back... we missed you."

    --
    "Why Subscribe?" Good question...
  36. ONLY on Slashdot... by robpoe · · Score: 2

    Would someone take a JOKE and actually re-code it...

    --
    = Grow a brain...
  37. Wrong by Mr.+Underbridge · · Score: 4, Informative
    unless you expect your first-born to be either masculine or feminine. English grammar does not have genders, which is why most people don't realize how screwed up this sounds (because they don't know what the word gender means). In many (most?) other languages words have geneders, e.g. in French a table is of feminine gender and in Russian it's masculine. Gender is purely a grammar term. Confusing the words "gender" and "sex" is equivalent to using "it" when referring to a person.

    That's true for other languages, but you might have consulted a dictionary before attempting (incorrectly and pedantically) to correct the poster regarding English usage. As seen from definitions 2-3, gender is an acceptable term in English to refer to a male/female distinction for humans.

    Other languages can do what they like, but simply because English is different from other languages doesn't make it wrong. Many languages use one word for two usages that are split in other languages See below. Sex and gender in this usage are accepted synonyms.

    *****************

    gender ( P ) Pronunciation Key (jndr) n.

    1. Grammar.

    1. A grammatical category used in the classification of nouns, pronouns, adjectives, and, in some languages, verbs that may be arbitrary or based on characteristics such as sex or animacy and that determines agreement with or selection of modifiers, referents, or grammatical forms.
    2. One category of such a set.
    3. The classification of a word or grammatical form in such a category.
    4. The distinguishing form or forms used.

    2. Sexual identity, especially in relation to society or culture.

    3. a) The condition of being female or male; sex.
    b) Females or males considered as a group: expressions used by one gender.

    1. Re:Wrong by StrongAxe · · Score: 2

      English grammar does not have genders, which is why most people don't realize how screwed up this sounds (because they don't know what the word gender means). In many (most?) other languages words have geneders, e.g. in French a table is of feminine gender and in Russian it's masculine. Gender is purely a grammar term. Confusing the words "gender" and "sex" is equivalent to using "it" when referring to a person.

      Actually, English does have gender, at least vestigal forms of it. I once got into hot water when an e-mail system I wrote spat out the error message "Judy ... has security locked his mailbox".

  38. kindergarden by tasinet · · Score: 3, Funny

    "Hi! I'm 212.90.0.89! Want to come to 127.0.0.1 and h4 | R-0uND?" -or- "Honey, look at that! our kids are so alike! They have the same class C ip address! How sweet!

    1. Re:kindergarden by Tantrum420 · · Score: 4, Funny

      "Hi! I'm 212.90.0.89! Want to come to 127.0.0.1 and h4 | R-0uND?"

      "Hmmm... I dunno... According to your DNS Server at 212.90.2.112, you're named Venom. That doesn't sound like somebody my admin would like me playing with."

  39. The name pattern nazis. by Qeygh · · Score: 2, Interesting

    I fight a continuing problem with name pattern nazis. I go by my second of four names so (with initials) my name would be written "R. Craig T. Altenburg". Way too many forms and computer programs tend to expect only names in the "First Name -- Middle Initial -- Last Name" pattern. I get somewhat upset when others try to mangle my name to fit.

    My rule is that others can use my full name without any initials; they can use the form shown above; or they can use simply "Craig Altenburg". I tend to use the latter.

    I had given (passing) thought to giving one of my kids "7" as a middle initial. If you say it as part of a full name it does not sound too obnoxious but, it would cause grief with some (in may opinion) brain damaged programs.

    When I code programs that require users to enter a name, I prefer asking for "Family Name" and "Given Names". Where either field can contain whatever characters the users wish to enter.

  40. sending e-mail by TubeSteak · · Score: 2, Insightful

    Either way, the kid's emails will never get past the spam filters.
    Imagine it: j8Lee@wherever.edu
    or worse: Br4d.Cumming@whevever.edu
    Seriously, how much of your email has gotten bounced or blackholed over the years because of your name?

    --
    [Fuck Beta]
    o0t!
    1. Re:sending e-mail by JohnGrahamCumming · · Score: 4, Interesting

      Who knows, but I can't get a Hotmail account using my real name, but I did manage to register one in the name Ivana Watch-Teens-Give-Head (story).

      John.

  41. This is illegal in most states. by httpamphibio.us · · Score: 4, Informative

    I'm getting married soon and I looked up the laws about changing your name in a couple different states, Washington, Oregon, and Ohio, and every single one of the says that it's alright to have a number spelled out, but having a numeral isn't allowed. Granted, things may be different outside of the US.

    --
    sig.
  42. Must clarify... by Fnkmaster · · Score: 4, Interesting
    Okay, I just want to set the record straight on this story since it's actually on-topic for once. I know Jenny Lee. We went to the same college, she was class of '99 and I was class of '00 (yes, you can easily figure out where that is if you want).


    She uses the number "8" in her byline, a clever device she came up with to differentiate herself from the hordes of other Asian girls named "Jennifer Lee". In fact, I believe there was actually another Jennifer Lee at her high school (Stuyvesant, in NYC, if I remember correctly) that wrote for the paper and she wanted to differentiate herself.


    Lots of people have made up stories about the origins of "that wacky NY Times writer's middle initial", that her parents gave her the middle intial "8" because it's a lucky number in China or some such thing. These stories were either made up by silly people or things she once told at a party after a few beers just to see if people would actually believe them, and they have propagated over the Internet (because when you are a Circuits writer, you get geek-fans). The 8 is a creation of her own. Why 8 rather than 9 or 10? I believe because she thought it sounded cool, though the number may have some other personal significance.


    So these days she may actually tell people her name is Jennifer 8. Lee because that's her byline and it's become associated with her. But it certainly wasn't her given name by her parents, and to the best of my knowledge she has never gone and changed her legal name or anything of that sort.

  43. Real, almost l337 name; numbers not allowed by MobyDisk · · Score: 4, Interesting
    This guy changed his name to Tronster in homage to the movie Tron and so that it would match his old BBS handle. Yes, his name is actually now Tronster. Okay, maybe it isn't as l337 as 7r0n513r, but still.

    Oh, and it doesn't matter because the US doesn't allow numbers in names

    1. Re:Real, almost l337 name; numbers not allowed by Dissenter · · Score: 2, Funny

      So instead of Br4d he could be Brfourd or instead of J4n37 she could be Jfournthreeseven. That would bo 0s0 c00l. Teachers would be like WTF?!?!

      --

      Dissenter
      "There is no knowledge that is not power."

  44. H Joke by twitter · · Score: 5, Funny
    I'd like to make a joke about H, but it would take too much Perparation. I get sore just thinking about it.

    --

    Friends don't help friends install M$ junk.

  45. alright, that's it... by andrewcone · · Score: 2, Funny

    i'm going to head home tonight and concieve a child with my girlfriend, just so he or she can grow up and beat up your kid for having a dumb name.

  46. A famous example by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Informative

    Apple's own Bo3b Johnson. He's been a member of Apple Developer Support since time immemorial, and has managed to get Bo3b on credit cards and (it's rumored) drivers licences since way before many slashdotters were born.

    The 3 is silent by the way. And apparently Bo3b is short for Ro3bert.

  47. Max Barry by Triv · · Score: 2, Interesting
    Max Barry's novel "Syrup" has a main character named "6". She was born as "0", with a number added on each of her birthdays. Her parents died in an airplane accident when she was 6, hence...

    (It's a GREAT book, by the way. :) )

    Triv

  48. He had it right, though for the wrong reasons by cgenman · · Score: 4, Insightful

    Gender is the personal expression of sexual identity. Definition 2 hits this directly, though I could see why an etymologyst would list the grammatical definition of gender first. The 3rd definition is more common usage, but it is split in half with 3b supporting the classification schema definition. Note, none of these definitions refer specifically to biology, just identity perception. And as the baby is too young to have a well formed sexual identity perception, it can be said to be biologically male or female, but it cannot be said to be psychologically masculine or feminine.

    Sex is verifiable. Gender is a perception.

  49. Housing director at my college by Theatetus · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Back in college my housing director's name was, no lie, "Sus3an". I figured at first that the "3" was just her trying to make a German "s" on a US keyboard but, no, it was in fact a 3.

    Don't do it, dude. Your kids will have enough reasons to hate you without giving them stupid names.

    --
    All's true that is mistrusted
    1. Re:Housing director at my college by empaler · · Score: 3, Informative

      A written '3'-like symbol in german is actually a minor 'z'. The reason for this common misunderstanding is that the old type 'B' in recent grammatical reforms has been allowed to become 'ss', where it historically was 'sz' (i.e. tall 's', curved 'z').
      Incidentally, the 'B'-character is also referred to as 'the sharp s' as the 'z' requires a sharper pronounciation than double-s would.

      (Try having taken german from 6th grade up)

    2. Re:Housing director at my college by sharkdba · · Score: 2, Interesting

      Don't do it, dude. Your kids will have enough reasons to hate you without giving them stupid names.

      Not necessary. In this more globalized world, and specially immigrant heavy US, there's so many unusual names, that people have stopped to raise their eyebrows for any new encountered name.

      Names with digits in them will be somewhat exotic at first, but then after a while they will simply give a statement: "your parents (or grandparents or some other relatives) are/were geeks, right?"

      --
      The purpose of life is to find the purpose of life.
    3. Re:Housing director at my college by sporkums · · Score: 2, Funny

      It was a silent "3", I assume. Otherwise, just how do you pronounce that?

    4. Re:Housing director at my college by blackfacetwin · · Score: 5, Funny

      One month, out of the blue, my long distance carrier began spelling my name "3cott" instead of "Scott." I phoned customer service to correct the change. Before I'd identified myself by name or explained my problem, the woman who'd answered the phone asked me for my account number. I told her, she tapped audibly on her computer keyboard, and after a pause she asked, "And am I speaking with Three-cott?" as if it were the most common name in the world.

  50. i'm so 1337, i'm 2448 by WormholeFiend · · Score: 4, Funny

    april fool jokes aside...

    if you want to give your child an unusual name, at least give him or her something s/he can abbreviate to something less unusual if s/he turns out to be more conservative than you, otherwise, s/he could have some problems, among other things, with finding a job, people assuming the name has typo or is a joke name (but I have a vewy good fwiend in Wome named Biggus Dickus!).

    even some foreigners are starting to modify their names due to embarrassing phonetic correlation in English... like this Vietnamese person I know: real name "Phuoc". (side note: a friend of mine who is a native French speaker took her child to the Toronto zoo once, and she was teaching her to say the animal names in French. The people around her were evidently scandalized to see this mother teach her daughter to point at a seal and to say: "un phoque!")

    That being said, I also know a guy named Richard Hertz, who everyone calls Dick. No joke.

    I wouldnt be surprised if one day someone starts an agency to research names that have absolutely no bad connotations in any language.

  51. The actual reference says... by mdfst13 · · Score: 2, Informative

    The actual reference from your link says "You can not use numbers in your name, like 911, in order to intentionally confuse people." From that, I take it that if your intent is not to confuse, you can use numbers in your name. If not, they should revise their wording in that statement.

  52. Alfred Bester was here first... by Wun+Hung+Lo · · Score: 4, Interesting

    In his novel "The Demolished Man", some of the characters (mostly the telepaths) had names that would now be considered internet slang names...Samuel @kins and someone else who last name was Wyg&, just to name a couple. But he was always ahead of his time. Maybe it was it just me, but I saw some of his influence in Stephenson's "Snow Crash". Hiro Protagonist has got to be the best name for a main character ever...!

    1. Re:Alfred Bester was here first... by Valdrax · · Score: 4, Informative

      Bester wrote "The Demolished Man" in 1953 when William Gibson was about 5.

      You owe it to yourself to read "The Demolished Man." Aside from the prominent use of telepaths in the story, it was in every way a proto-cyberpunk novel as well as being just one of the best-written books I've ever read. Bester's "The Stars My Desitination" is even better, though. It takes an intelligent look at what society would be like if everyone could teleport at a whim and tosses it into the background of one of the most vivid revenge stories ever told. Gulliver Foyle is the single greatest "larger-than-life" protagonist that I've ever seen. His indomitable will is monstrous and his passion and fury leaps out and grabs the reader.

      Bester is one of my favorite authors of all time.

      --
      If it's for-profit but free, you're not the customer -- you're the product (e.g., the Slashdot Beta's "audience").
  53. anonymity by Transient0 · · Score: 4, Interesting

    it's true. I have an uncommon enough name that when I do a google on my name in quotes, over half the results are actually about me. This has good and bad sides. For one thing, anyone who knows my name can find out a fair bit about me pretty fast. Fortunately nothing bad about me is really on the net, but who knows if it will stay that way.

    On the other hand, I have a friend named John Smith who was arrested on pretty serious drug charges but managed to get off without a jail sentence. There are half a dozen articles on the internet that mention his name in this regard, but type John Smith into google and they're nowhere in the first thousand results.

  54. It's a child, not a toy... by meatball_mulligan · · Score: 2, Insightful

    This is your child, not your new toy or pet. Why should she have to go through life branded with a weird name because of your obsessions. How would you like to have been called 'Caboose Williamson' because of your dad's fondness for model trains? What if your mom was really into amateur radio and decided to christen you 'Frequency Modulation Jones'?

    This name is a gift you are giving to your child. Try to give her something she might want.

    m.m.

  55. Re:the @kins domain name by halightw · · Score: 3, Interesting

    Looks like Sally Atkins had this idea as well...

    Domain Name: KINS.COM
    Administrative Contact:
    T, SA (30093608I) sally@kins.com

  56. Always room for Jello by CrazyTalk · · Score: 2, Interesting

    A friend of my sister had twins and (no joke) named them Orangello and Lemongello (Orange jello and Lemon jello, get it?). They are of school age now, and their names are practially urban legends, but as far as I've heard havent had any problems because of their names.

  57. It's Illegal by md27 · · Score: 2, Interesting

    I'm pretty sure that, in New Jersey at least, you can't have profanity or digits in your legal name. Now teaching your kid to spell their name that way would be a completely different story...

  58. our child by shemnon · · Score: 2, Informative

    We are expecting a child in october and I am trying to convince my wife to name it "Princess 247" if it's a girl and "Hot_Wheels 180" if it's a boy.

    Her most convincing arguments have to do with the standardized testing that is going on in the schools now. Unless I can show her a bubble sheet with numbers for the middle initial or an underscore for the first name they are out of consideration. (I releneted on the colouring of the names as well, since I was going to make the "Hot" red and the "Wheels" a dark rubber grey but there's a chance the boy may be colour blind).

    Dose anyone work for the ITBS tests or the CAT tests and can upgrade the bubble sheets for this? It doesn't have to be immediate, Since it is at least 5-7 years away until they will test I think that if I can show they will be there by then I can make her budge. That will show her to make comprimizes that aren't!

    --
    --Shemnon
  59. Mod Parent Up! Re:oy by J05H · · Score: 2, Interesting

    Yes! Mod the parent up! He is very right!

    Embrace the persona of "DAD". I wish my parents had...

    J05H

    --
    gigantino.tv - Heavy but weighs nothing.
  60. Famous Texan "Ima Hogg" by macmastery · · Score: 2, Interesting

    A famous Texan Ima Hogg. No foolin'.

  61. Opt for BrainF*ck by WyldOne · · Score: 2, Funny

    why use just numbers? Besides you know they are gonna need counciling anyway after that

    --

    make Linux, not Microsoft. sin(beast) = -0.809016994374947424102293417182819
  62. Even spaces are a problem by IncohereD · · Score: 2, Interesting

    I know a guy whose last name is "Vanden Hoven", with a space. His department of electronics account (FirstnameLastname) at university would never work, so he'd always have to use his partner's.

    Personally I have an uppercase in the middle of my last name, MacLeod, and that often gets filtered to lowercase, especially if an entry form is ALL CAPS and there's no real way to represent it.

  63. go ahead... do it... by Transcendent · · Score: 2, Funny

    ... there's no way he'll get is ass kicked in school.

    Seriously, are you retarded?

  64. SF double feature by Doc+Ruby · · Score: 2, Funny

    You are the misfit. And, with kids named "Brad" and "Janet", your family problems will be astronomical.

    --

    --
    make install -not war

  65. More April Fool's Garbage by ThresholdRPG · · Score: 3, Funny

    Oh boy.

    Another stupid April Fool's news item.

    April 2nd cannot come soon enough.

    Can't we just add a day to February and get rid of April 1?

    --

    -Michael
    Threshold RPG
  66. A Great Opportunity Missed by jbm · · Score: 2, Funny

    Years ago, I worked with a guy whose last name was Meth. When his wife became pregnant with a girl, I tried my best to convince him that their daughter should be named Crystal, but it didn't take. I don't think he ever got the joke, though.

  67. Andrew Peacock by geofpick · · Score: 2, Funny

    Peacock is a pretty dodgy surname,
    but what possessed the parents
    to call their son Andrew?
    Poor kid.
    We all called him droopy .