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Joke-e-oke Makes You a Comedian

Uber-Review writes "If you ever aspired to be the next Jerry Seinfeld instead of the next American Idol. Maybe the product featured by Wired is just right for you. Joke-e-oke, basically a karaoke with stand-up comedy material. Joke-e-oke is a laptop rigged to a video projector allows you to choose from a list of stand-up comedy icons to perform. A built in laugh track is added, timed perfectly to accent punch lines. Obstacles are programmed in so participants onstage get a taste of what real comedians go through by firing off heckle lines for the bar crowd to yell in unison at the Joke-e-oke participant."

185 of 279 comments (clear)

  1. Looks interesting to say the least by mycro · · Score: 1

    Yes!! I don't even need to be funny to look like a jackass! Built-in laugh tracks? I guess it might be entertaining to play alone.

    1. Re:Looks interesting to say the least by justkarl · · Score: 1

      Yes!! I don't even need to be funny to look like a jackass!You mean, you don't need to look like a jackass to be funny?

      No, nevermind. You had it right the first time.

    2. Re:Looks interesting to say the least by mfh · · Score: 2, Interesting

      Yes!! I don't even need to be funny to look like a jackass! Built-in laugh tracks? I guess it might be entertaining to play alone.

      Forget entertaining. This device will enable Slashdotters to achive higher goals on Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs. Currently many of us are stuck at the Safety rung, but this gizmo will allow us to achive Self Actualization!

      --
      The dangers of knowledge trigger emotional distress in human beings.
    3. Re:Looks interesting to say the least by modecx · · Score: 1

      Will it also allow us to synergize and leverage the paradigm shift?

      'Cause if so, I'm totally there.

      --
      Constitutional rights may be respected, repealed, or modified; but they must never be ignored.
    4. Re:Looks interesting to say the least by hesiod · · Score: 1

      Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs: [...] The third layer is the need for love and belonging, followed by the need for esteem.

      Interesting that esteem is listed after love/belonging, since many of us have no chance of love, supposedly because we lack the self-esteem it brings. I don't like that level very much...

  2. Humor by Number? by ackthpt · · Score: 5, Funny
    In the prison cafeteria, a new inmate's first lunch is interrupted by someone behind him shouting out, "431!" There's a chorus of laughter before another voice a way off shouts, "218" Again, much laughter. The new guy asks an old con sitting beside him what's with the numbers and laughter. The old guy replies, "Most of the guys have been in here so long that they know all the jokes by number. Go ahead, try one." The new guy says, "But I don't know what jokes go with what numbers!" The old con replies, "doesn't matter, just toss any number out." So the new guy shouts, "687!" Silence. The old guy says, "try a different one", so the new guy shouts "439!" Again, silence. The new guy shouts out a third number, "714!" Which is again met by silence. The old guy says, "eh, I guess some guys just can't tell a joke."

    BTW, Karoke still draws a lot of drunk or soon to be at a local pub.

    --

    A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
    1. Re:Humor by Number? by MPHellwig · · Score: 4, Funny

      "1014" a dead silence followed by a extraordinary huge laughter.
      "Heh, that my friend is a new one"

    2. Re:Humor by Number? by Eberlin · · Score: 1

      Your post makes the somewhat hidden point that any speech (and most other forms of art) is judged based on two basic criteria: content and delivery.

      A comedian/orator/singer without good content can only go so far, regardless of how well they deliver their non-message. (think of most of today's pop/punk bands)

      On the other hand, great speech-writers/lyricists won't do much without being able to deliver the content well. (think Carrot-Top doing Shakespeare)

      For those planning speeches (for a school report, a work-related project, or Amateur night at the comedy club) -- equally focus on your content and its delivery.

    3. Re:Humor by Number? by pete6677 · · Score: 1

      I'd hate to imagine what joke number 69 must be about.

    4. Re:Humor by Number? by jcuervo · · Score: 1

      +5!

      *silence*

      Crap.

      --
      Assume I was drunk when I posted this.
    5. Re:Humor by Number? by same_old_story · · Score: 1

      I wouldn't.

    6. Re:Humor by Number? by ackthpt · · Score: 2, Informative
      And old joke (but not as old as the numbered joke one.)

      It was based upon Abbott and Costello's 'Who's on First' sketch and is a bit past it's prime, with Hu Jintao being leader of pretty much everything in PR of China, now.

      --

      A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
    7. Re:Humor by Number? by Tribbin · · Score: 1

      "23783!", (delay), *loud laughter*

      That was a new joke in prison.

      --
      If you mod this up, your slashdot background will turn into a beautiful sunset!
    8. Re:Humor by Number? by tomsuchy · · Score: 1, Funny

      non-linux software: Does it run on Linux?

      linux software: Imagine a Beowulf cluster ...

      some hardware: Will it run linux?

      patents, copyrights, trademarks: All Your Base ...


      -tom

      --
      this isn't a sig. i type this (including the two dashes), every time i post, just to make it look like a sig.
    9. Re:Humor by Number? by spac3manspiff · · Score: 1

      Eh, it's pretty bad
      http://bash.org/?quote=69

    10. Re:Humor by Number? by Poeir · · Score: 1

      Sounds like something we could use for Slashdot.

      --
      Sigs are like bumper stickers.
    11. Re:Humor by Number? by 88NoSoup4U88 · · Score: 1

      hehe, that's how I know the joke too ; Wonder if it has anything to do with being dutch (assuming your dutch too, with your email being from xs4all)

    12. Re:Humor by Number? by plover · · Score: 1
      One of the other cons calls out "23", which is followed by dead silence.

      The new guy asks, "Why didn't they laugh at that one?"

      The lifer replies, "Oh, that's Charlie. He never could do an Irish accent."

      --
      John
  3. You are kidding right? by 0xdeaddead · · Score: 4, Funny

    Although this reminds of STTNG where Data tries to be a comedian.. it was ... different.

    1. Re:You are kidding right? by dfn5 · · Score: 3, Funny
      A Borg, A Ferenghi, and a Romulan walk into a bar...

      --
      -- Thou hast strayed far from the path of the Avatar.
    2. Re:You are kidding right? by Savatte · · Score: 1

      Why did the Klingon cross the neutral zone..

    3. Re:You are kidding right? by theMerovingian · · Score: 5, Funny


      Two of them are talking about the amount of control they have over their wives, while the Ferenghi remains quiet. After a while one of the first two turns to the third and says, "Well, what about you, what sort of control do you have over your wife?"

      The Ferenghi says "I'll tell you. Just the other night my wife came to me on her hands and knees." The first two blokes were amazed. "What happened then?" they asked.

      "She said, 'GET OUT FROM UNDER THE BED AND FIGHT LIKE A MAN!'."

      --
      "If you think you have things under control, you're not going fast enough." --Mario Andretti
    4. Re:You are kidding right? by ackthpt · · Score: 1
      Although this reminds of STTNG where Data tries to be a comedian.. it was ... different.

      Wasn't this something along the lines of humor being like a butterfly, as you disect it the thing dies in the process.

      --

      A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
    5. Re:You are kidding right? by Short+Circuit · · Score: 1

      He was looking for par'mach, of course.

    6. Re:You are kidding right? by ilikejam · · Score: 1

      And your point is?

      --
      C-x C-s C-x k
    7. Re:You are kidding right? by ilikejam · · Score: 1

      Yeah. Fair enough.

      --
      C-x C-s C-x k
    8. Re:You are kidding right? by Badfysh · · Score: 1

      Mr. Tricorder was pretty funny..

      --

      I was conned by an old man in a cloak. It turns out those *were* the droids I was looking for.

    9. Re:You are kidding right? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      ..maybe so, but i saw his lips move...

    10. Re:You are kidding right? by Eric+Savage · · Score: 1

      The funny part about the parent isn't that its actually funny, but that it made it all the way to +5 funny...

      --

      This is not the greatest sig in the world, this is just a tribute.
    11. Re:You are kidding right? by DoktorTomoe · · Score: 1

      Makes more sense if the Ferenghi were a Klingon, njet?

  4. Dangerous headline.. by Propagandhi · · Score: 4, Insightful

    Joke-e-oke makes me a comedian like karaoke me a pop star. Suggesting that either of those statements are true can lead to some mind numbingly bad (but surprisingly confident) performances... especially when combined with alcohol.

    1. Re:Dangerous headline.. by justkarl · · Score: 1

      especially when combined with alcohol.

      That's because alcohol messes with your ability to make judgements.
      REminds me of this time that this girl was totally wasted and tried to tell this "would eye" joke. It lasted like 15 min., and needless to say, didn't work as planned. But it was way funnier.

    2. Re:Dangerous headline.. by Trillan · · Score: 1

      We have a keno here that runs every five minutes. Their recent advertising runs along the idea "Five minutes isn't perfect for everything, but it's perfect for keno."

      One of the commercials has someone belting out karaoke in a horrible off tune voice, mumbling the wrong words and everything.

    3. Re:Dangerous headline.. by hawk · · Score: 1

      >can lead to some mind numbingly bad (but surprisingly confident) performances

      OK, we;ll bite

      [*all together*]

      No, how bad are you?

      hawk, too late for vaudefille

    4. Re:Dangerous headline.. by Hogwash+McFly · · Score: 1

      Yeah, Dennis Miller. Only one in a million people would find him funny.

      --
      Mother, do you think they'll like this sig?
    5. Re:Dangerous headline.. by Hogwash+McFly · · Score: 1

      Try this while drinking heavily:

      Please select joke subject.

      You have selected 'Adult'.

      Please select joke difficulty on a scale of one to ten.

      You have selected 'Ten'.

      Your randomly chosen joke is George Carlin's 'Seven Dirty Words' bit.

      Might be quite interesting to watch, actually. :)

      --
      Mother, do you think they'll like this sig?
    6. Re:Dangerous headline.. by G-funk · · Score: 1

      Who needs Joke-e-oke anyway? Get a bunch of blokes pissed and we all turn into a horrible conglomeration of Homer Simpson, Eddie Murphy, Dennis Leary and Dave Chappell already. Who needs a machine to remind you of the correct way to say it?

      "Hey, I'm Mr T I'll rip your cock off with my ass"

      "And then he said: 'gooni-goo-goo'"

      Yeah that's some very funny shit.

      --
      Send lawyers, guns, and money!
    7. Re:Dangerous headline.. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      ...you sure it wasn't Ashlee simpson?

    8. Re:Dangerous headline.. by Bender0x7D1 · · Score: 1

      Eddie Murphy was right... everyone would mess up his jokes. You were supposed to stick with the rabbit joke.

      --
      Reading code is like reading the dictionary - you have to read half of it before you can go back and understand it.
  5. Look, Ma, I'm fay-moose! by grub · · Score: 5, Insightful


    "We live in a reality-television age where normal people see themselves as the star. Joke-e-oke shows that everyone can be a star,"

    Sure, for 5 minutes. Then the reality of empty, meaningless lives hits the people when they remember they aren't famous or "stars". Aspire to be yourself, not a TV character. (see the related JE I wrote on March 15 linked in my sig)

    --
    Trolling is a art,
    1. Re:Look, Ma, I'm fay-moose! by mmkkbb · · Score: 2, Insightful

      You know, there's a wide middle ground of emotion between being an actual star and the utter depression you describe.

      --
      -mkb
    2. Re:Look, Ma, I'm fay-moose! by ackthpt · · Score: 1
      Sure, for 5 minutes.

      Longer than that. Some guy comes into the pub, 'sings' Hotel California in a flat voice and I'm so aggrevated I leave. I could hear that off-key voice in my head most of the way home. Finally something came on the car radio to replace it.

      I mean, where the hack was this when I needed it?

      --

      A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
    3. Re:Look, Ma, I'm fay-moose! by The-Bus · · Score: 2, Interesting

      That's a bit extreme. I think for most people this helps as a social icebreaker to get them to do something that they haven't done before, sort of like a trainer to help you tell jokes (as opposed to being funny*).

      It's a way to kill some time or be entertained. I don't think most people will derive meaning and self-worth from being able to recycle some old Billy Crystal routine.

      * Anyone who is regularly funny, for the most part, will not need a machine to want to do a joke in front of a small crowd. I like my quips in small company and have my own sense of humor. I don't know if doing someone's schtick in front of a bar is my idea of fun.

      --

      Small potatoes make the steak look bigger.

    4. Re:Look, Ma, I'm fay-moose! by Intron · · Score: 1

      Its tough having millions of dollars and lots of attention. I don't know how they manage. That's why I went into Engineering.

      --
      Intron: the portion of DNA which expresses nothing useful.
    5. Re:Look, Ma, I'm fay-moose! by nkh · · Score: 1

      You're both right: most people "don't know" they live meaningless lives, that's why as soon as they sober up, they go back in front of their TV. But the reason they watch TV is that they have to fill the void with something noisy and entertaining (which I would describe as some kind of mild depression). This stupid game is just here to change your mind for five minutes but it never last longer.

    6. Re:Look, Ma, I'm fay-moose! by nkh · · Score: 1

      Maybe I don't get it but I don't need to learn how to "tell jokes" to my friends. It comes naturally during an intelligent conversation. If you need some kind of social icebreaker to learn jokes, you must be an otaku on hikikomori stuck in your bedroom.

    7. Re:Look, Ma, I'm fay-moose! by MissTuxie · · Score: 1

      this link just made me lose all respect I had between co-workers. I'm still laugh-crying.

    8. Re:Look, Ma, I'm fay-moose! by gstoddart · · Score: 1
      You know, there's a wide middle ground of emotion between being an actual star and the utter depression you describe.

      Only another few beers, really. :-P
      --
      Lost at C:>. Found at C.
    9. Re:Look, Ma, I'm fay-moose! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      You, sir have obviously never had to do any business in Asia.
      Karaoke and the ability to hold down your drinks can be all the difference between getting a contract and going home with nothing. Believe me, we all aren't up there to be TV stars... Sometimes we don't even know we are there...

    10. Re:Look, Ma, I'm fay-moose! by gardyloo · · Score: 1

      I don't think most people will derive meaning and self-worth from being able to recycle some old Billy Crystal routine.

      You're SO telling the wrong crowd. Old people in Korea might agree with you, but unless you're covered in hot grits and running BSD (dead) on a beowulf cluster of tinfoil hats, no one will listen to you. Evar.
      Profit! from my advice.

    11. Re:Look, Ma, I'm fay-moose! by mmkkbb · · Score: 1

      This stupid game is just here to change your mind for five minutes but it never last longer.

      They should post on slashdot. This game lasts forever, and maybe they'd raise the average intelligence of this place past the IMDb boards.

      --
      -mkb
    12. Re:Look, Ma, I'm fay-moose! by MightyMartian · · Score: 1
      Fuck advertisers, fuck consumerism, fuck TV.

      What's wrong with the opposite sex?

      --
      The world's burning. Moped Jesus spotted on I50. Details at 11.
    13. Re:Look, Ma, I'm fay-moose! by hawk · · Score: 1

      >It comes naturally during an intelligent conversation.

      Not for everyone. One of the best pieces of advice I've seen for beginning instructors is that humor is wonderful in the classroom--but that if you don't have a sense of humor, don't try to fake it.

      And society *does* need folks without a sense of humor--where would the IRS be without them?

      hawk

    14. Re:Look, Ma, I'm fay-moose! by Hogwash+McFly · · Score: 1

      Says he with a Fan list the size of Big Ben...

      Got any fashion tips for me grub?

      --
      Mother, do you think they'll like this sig?
    15. Re:Look, Ma, I'm fay-moose! by Hogwash+McFly · · Score: 1

      Also overpriced.

      --
      Mother, do you think they'll like this sig?
    16. Re:Look, Ma, I'm fay-moose! by grub · · Score: 1

      Got any fashion tips for me grub?

      Non-bigname jeans from a local shop and a logo-less t-shirt are what I wore today. :)

      --
      Trolling is a art,
    17. Re:Look, Ma, I'm fay-moose! by shayne321 · · Score: 1

      Fuck advertisers, fuck consumerism, fuck TV.

      Ok, since you asked: fuck

      --
      Today I didn't even have to use my AK; I got to say it was a good day -- Icecube
    18. Re:Look, Ma, I'm fay-moose! by porcupine8 · · Score: 1
      Sure, for 5 minutes. Then the reality of empty, meaningless lives hits the people when they remember they aren't famous or "stars".
      . . .
      (see the related JE I wrote on March 15 linked in my sig)

      I suppose I'm the only one who sees any irony here.

      --
      Warning: Apple/Nintendo fangirl. Likes her electronics cute & cuddly. May be rabid.
    19. Re:Look, Ma, I'm fay-moose! by Skynyrd · · Score: 1

      You're both right: most people "don't know" they live meaningless lives, that's why as soon as they sober up, they go back in front of their TV. But the reason they watch TV is that they have to fill the void with something noisy and entertaining (which I would describe as some kind of mild depression).

      TV? That's what slashdot is for.

    20. Re:Look, Ma, I'm fay-moose! by porcupine8 · · Score: 1

      I'll give you a clue: I didn't read the journal entry. What it says doesn't really matter.

      --
      Warning: Apple/Nintendo fangirl. Likes her electronics cute & cuddly. May be rabid.
  6. in my industry by theMerovingian · · Score: 2, Funny


    We aren't allowed to use scripted teleprompters in my line of work... so I secretly arranged to have an earpiece and a wireless audio receiver hidden in my jacket.

    I sure fooled everyone in the audience... heehee!

    ~GWB

    --
    "If you think you have things under control, you're not going fast enough." --Mario Andretti
    1. Re:in my industry by magefile · · Score: 1

      I sure fooled everyone in the audience... heehee!

      There's a saying in Tennessee - have it in Texas, probably Tennesee, too ... fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice ... uh ... can't get fooled again!

  7. Joke-e-oke by Neil+Blender · · Score: 5, Funny

    "Where the joke's on you."

    1. Re:Joke-e-oke by ackthpt · · Score: 1
      "Where the joke's on you."

      Indeed, where else could you sit, pay a few $ a pint or a couple more for cocktails, and listen to recycled humor regurgitated by amatures?

      Come to think of it, that's what American Idol pretty much is, especially if you're paying a cable bill to watch it...

      It's probably going to catch on a bit. Some people think Karoke is dead, but they just started it at a local pub and it draws a big crowd. After a couple pints your singing voice is pretty well gone, but no such worry with telling jokes, except it may throw off your timing.

      --

      A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
    2. Re:Joke-e-oke by Koiu+Lpoi · · Score: 1

      So, then, in soviet russia, would you be on the joke? Yeesh, if that doesn't sound wrong.

  8. its all in the delivery by CmdrObvious · · Score: 5, Funny

    as any comedian will tell you, it is all in the delivery. the material is important, but delivery is MUCH more important...

    the automated heckling sounds fun, kinda like if every 20 posts on /., there was one that said "in soviet russia...." oh wait, nevermind.

    1. Re:its all in the delivery by ackthpt · · Score: 2, Interesting
      as any comedian will tell you, it is all in the delivery. the material is important, but delivery is MUCH more important...

      I've been listening to a lot of old radio comedy shows, Jack Benny, Phil Harris, Bob Hope, Fred Allen, etc. and these were all done before a live audience, while broadcast live over radio.

      They bomb, they screw up, it still leaves the audiences howling with laughter. There's something about building up to a joke or expectation on the part of the audience. These people even laughed at their own jokes and so did the audience. At least on one occasion there's like laughter as the punchline is fumbled, the audience laughs and the comedian tries again and keeps screwing up and the audience keeps laughing, even harder until the comedian fires off something like "good thing we're professionals" and finally finish the joke off. Fun to listen to, even after 60 years in some cases.

      --

      A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
    2. Re:its all in the delivery by MightyMartian · · Score: 1

      I remember the old Carol Burnett Show, where Tim Conway seemed to dedicate that entire portion of his life to making the rest of the cast, and Harvey Corman in particular, bust up with laughter. I think that's probably still my favorite comedy show. There was spontaneity and such comedic talent that even collosal screw ups were funny. When I watch the crapola that SNL and MadTV try to pass off as humor, it's just kinda sad. Maybe SNL's writers can use this machine. It couldn't make their jokes any worse.

      --
      The world's burning. Moped Jesus spotted on I50. Details at 11.
    3. Re:its all in the delivery by Delilah+Jones · · Score: 1

      ...or adding "in bed" to your fortune cookie.

      --
      http://augustwestproducts.i8.com
  9. the good thing about joke-e-oke by new+death+barbie · · Score: 5, Funny

    ... is if you screw up, at least nobody laughs at you

    thank you, thank you, I'm here all week...

    --

    It's supposed to be completely automatic, but actually you have to press this button.

  10. WTF by Timesprout · · Score: 4, Funny

    Great so now entertainment consists of a 'performer' being told what to say by a machine and that same machine telling the audience how to respond.

    --
    Do not try to read the dupe, thats impossible. Instead, only try to realize the truth
    What truth?
    There is no dupe
    1. Re:WTF by merlin_jim · · Score: 2, Interesting

      Great so now entertainment consists of a 'performer' being told what to say by a machine and that same machine telling the audience how to respond.

      Have you watched MTV lately?

      I spoke with Vanilla Ice last year about what's different about his career post prison. Basically he said that the changes were minor, he just writes and performs his own material now that he got rid of his MTV-tied-in Agent...

      I've heard that most big artists have a similar career; their job is to hold the mic and look pretty. Singing ability, while a plus, is not required. Most stage musicians use an electronic device called the auto-tuner these days. Look it up; I could be an american idol with on of those babies on my mic jack.

      Oh and IAAUAT (I Am An Underground Audio Technician)

      --
      I am disrespectful to dirt! Can you see that I am serious?!
    2. Re:WTF by Otter · · Score: 1

      1) Vanilla Ice has a career?

      2) Vanilla Ice was in prison?

      3) Vanilla Ice has been on MTV in the last decade?

      4) Writing and performing your own material is a "minor change"?

      Meanwhile, now I have "Ice Ice Baby" stuck in my head, you bastard. To the extreme, I rock a mic like a vandal, light up a stage and wax a chump like a candle!

    3. Re:WTF by merlin_jim · · Score: 1

      1) Vanilla Ice has a career?

      2) Vanilla Ice was in prison?

      3) Vanilla Ice has been on MTV in the last decade?

      4) Writing and performing your own material is a "minor change"?

      1) Yes, he's doing a mix of hard rock / rap these days. His new album is pretty good. And he's a juggalo (re: Insane Clown Posse) which is a guaranteed million or so fans. Most juggalos (and I am one) know of him and like his new stuff. It didn't hurt that he was on surreal life sporting juggalo gear every week.

      2) Yeah, I think the charge was domestic violence. I'm pretty sure it involved a girlfriend and an ax or a knife during a "heated discussion"

      3) In the last decade and a half maybe. Not counting documentaries, of course. But I don't imagine that much has changed since then.

      4) That was hyperbole... maybe I should've wrapped it in a [sarcasm /] block...

      --
      I am disrespectful to dirt! Can you see that I am serious?!
    4. Re:WTF by ackthpt · · Score: 1
      Great so now entertainment consists of a 'performer' being told what to say by a machine and that same machine telling the audience how to respond.

      Soooooo... played any video games lately?

      --

      A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
    5. Re:WTF by Otter · · Score: 1
      Well, now I have "What Is A Juggalo?" stuck in my head instead. I'm down with the clown, and I'm down for life, yo!

      I can live with that, though.

    6. Re:WTF by MPHellwig · · Score: 1

      auto-tuner, hmm I had no idea I could sing better with my guitar tuning device on my microphone.

    7. Re:WTF by MightyMartian · · Score: 1

      I dunno. The guy made his name with a butchered version of an awesome Queen-David Bowie collaboration. He couldn't dance. He couldn't sing. He couldn't write. He managed to piss off the real rappers.

      --
      The world's burning. Moped Jesus spotted on I50. Details at 11.
    8. Re:WTF by merlin_jim · · Score: 1

      Now I gotta ask are you a juggalo or do you just know one?

      Slashdotting Juggalos represent!!!!

      Vanilla Ice plays the Gathering of the Juggalos every year. There's even a video of his performance from last year. I'm the guy in the wheelchair and face paint to the left of the stage :)

      --
      I am disrespectful to dirt! Can you see that I am serious?!
    9. Re:WTF by Fizzl · · Score: 1
      Great so now entertainment consists of a 'performer' being told what to say by a machine and that same machine telling the audience how to respond.

      It would be so much better, if the machines would be different atleast...
    10. Re:WTF by MixmastaKooz · · Score: 1

      Sounds like a George W. Bush "Town Hall Meeting"

      Thank you! I'm here 'til Tuesday, try the veal!

    11. Re:WTF by davidhan · · Score: 1

      Isn't that how Saturday Night Live works? Or any tv comedy show for that matter?

  11. Hacking the Joke-e-oke by red_dragon · · Score: 3, Informative

    You know the machine has been tampered with when the poor sod on the stage whips out 31 different versions of "Why did the chicken cross the road?" and the laugh track has been replaced with Nelson Muntz's "Ha ha!".

    --
    In Soviet Russia, Jesus asks: "What Would You Do?"
    1. Re:Hacking the Joke-e-oke by FidelCatsro · · Score: 2, Insightful

      You know you have masterd comedy when you can get a laugh out of a Chicken crossing the road joke .Either that or you left the NO2 running

      --
      The only things certain in war are Propaganda and Death. You can never be sure which is which though
    2. Re:Hacking the Joke-e-oke by jcuervo · · Score: 1
      You know you have masterd comedy when you can get a laugh out of a Chicken crossing the road joke .
      Q: How many chickens does it take to cross a road?
      A: One.

      ...There needs to be a -1, Unfunny.
      --
      Assume I was drunk when I posted this.
    3. Re:Hacking the Joke-e-oke by Excen · · Score: 1

      I dunno. I probably could get some laughs out of a chicken-crossing-the-road joke at the Marijuanalogues. If I go last, I could be almost as good as Yakov Smirnoff up there.

      Eeeeen Soviet Russia, comic insults you!

      --
      "No beer until you finish your tequila!" -Leela's Dad
  12. Eh? by Bazman · · Score: 1

    I thought that headline said 'Canadian'.

    1. Re:Eh? by eobanb · · Score: 1

      Wow, what I wouldn't give for one 'a those...

      --USA liberal

      --

      Take off every sig. For great justice.

  13. The Free version by DanThe1Man · · Score: 4, Insightful

    From the article:
    he beta test version simply involved taping episodes of Comedy Central stand-up specials with the closed-captioning titles on. The sound would be turned down, the TV screen turned away from the audience and toward the Joke-e-oke participant, who would read the closed-captioned titles into a microphone.

    So, just do that instead of wasteing your money on this stupid software. You are doing the same thing.

    1. Re:The Free version by Feynman · · Score: 1

      Similarly, buy a comedy album and memorize it.

      I did this in junior high with George Carlin's "Things to Watch Out For"

    2. Re:The Free version by Flakeloaf · · Score: 2, Funny

      The performer takes the stage, closed captioned program in sight and begins:

      SO I WEBT DOWN TO THE BAR AND I SAW M_____________Y F RIEND GEORGE. I SAID TO HIM JOE ORANGE WHAT ARE Y@U

      and the rest was unintelligible amid the hail of rotten fruit.

      --

      Am I the only one who heard Roxette to sing "I'm gonna get blitzed for some sex"?

  14. So... by omahajim · · Score: 5, Funny

    Joke-e-oke no more makes me a comedian, than having an MCSE will make me a system admin.

    1. Re:So... by drewzhrodague · · Score: 1

      Ah-Hahahahahahaahahahha!

      Sorry, had to laugh. That was funny. Back to my Windows NT...

      --
      Zhrodague.net - I do projects and stuff too.
  15. Grammar Police by DustyShadow · · Score: 1

    If you ever aspired to be the next Jerry Seinfeld instead of the next American Idol. That is not a sentence.

    1. Re:Grammar Police by Feynman · · Score: 3, Funny
      That is not a sentence.

      Yes is.

    2. Re:Grammar Police by DustyShadow · · Score: 1

      Yes is

      I can't tell if you are trying to make a joke or if you forgot "it". Either way, that first sentence is only a fragment.

    3. Re:Grammar Police by Feynman · · Score: 1

      I trying make joke. Obviously bad delivery. Maybe need Joke-e-o-jigger.

    4. Re:Grammar Police by northcat · · Score: 1

      This too is not a sentence: Joke-e-oke, basically a karaoke with stand-up comedy material.

    5. Re:Grammar Police by rob_squared · · Score: 1

      This was handled by a slashdot editor, just be thankful they even bothered with punctuation and capitalization. I swear I'll kill myself if there's grammatical errors in this post.

      --
      I don't get it.
    6. Re:Grammar Police by soft_guy · · Score: 1

      Whoever marked this as a troll is either mean or has no sense of humor. I actually laughed out loud at this.

      --
      Avoid Missing Ball for High Score
    7. Re:Grammar Police by Slashdot+is+dead · · Score: 1

      I was about to say the same exact thing.

  16. oh haha funny by FidelCatsro · · Score: 1

    "If you ever aspired to be the next Jerry Seinfeld instead of the next American Idol. Maybe the product featured by Wired is just right for you."
    I youve ever aspired to be either , then i can sugest a few other things you may enjoy *click click boom* seriously though

    Its nice to see something to help people build the comedy stylings up ,
    you could ask it if it runs linux and see if you get a laugh , or perhaps would a beowulf cluster of these substitute a studio audiance .

    *cough* well everyone says my jokes are laughable or was that me they were talking about .

    This could actualy be genuinly helpfull , if there is one thing i notice which is always a problem for aspiring acts on the comedy circut its timing and presentation.
    This should really help those intrested work on the delivery of the lines if it functions as advertised. Then the only hurdal left is actual funny jokes and demenur oh and confidence

    --
    The only things certain in war are Propaganda and Death. You can never be sure which is which though
  17. /Grammar Nazi by TheLetterPsy · · Score: 3, Funny

    The grammar in that summary is a Joke-e-oke.

  18. Re:quick poll: who cares? by abandonment · · Score: 1

    this is exactly what i was thinking - are we that deprived of valid news that we're reduced to debating about the validity of a machine that is supposed to make you try to sound funny?

    ridiculous

  19. It's been done by Jeremy+Erwin · · Score: 3, Informative

    Listen to the second segment from this This American Life show for a good illustration of what can go wrong.

    1. Re:It's been done by jwf24 · · Score: 1

      That's the segment I was looking for. Nice job...

  20. Empty, meaningless, etc. by sczimme · · Score: 4, Insightful


    Then the reality of empty, meaningless lives hits the people when they remember they aren't famous or "stars". Aspire to be yourself, not a TV character.

    Well put. *goes off to RTFJE* Also well put.

    The root cause of all this me-me-me silliness seems to be a blistering lack of self-confidence in the general populace, creating a need to conform. One might think that the extraordinary (and IMO ridiculous) efforts society puts into ensuring no one's widdle feewings are hurt might help people believe they are in fact worthwhile humans (however misguided that viewpoint might be in some cases). I guess we have inadvertently created a nation of shallow, vapid, me-mongers who need to be reassured every second that they really are unique and beautiful snowflakes. Oopsie.

    My apologies - I must be wearing the cynical hat today...

    --
    I want to drag this out as long as possible. Bring me my protractor.
    1. Re:Empty, meaningless, etc. by mmkkbb · · Score: 1

      The root cause of all this me-me-me silliness seems to be a blistering lack of self-confidence in the general populace, creating a need to conform.

      And of course, you are Better(tm) and Different(tm).

      One might think that the extraordinary (and IMO ridiculous) efforts society puts into ensuring no one's widdle feewings are hurt

      Drunkfux attempts at performing someone else's comedy routines are a sure bet for people's feelings to get hurt. I am all for people making fools of themselves for entertainment.

      --
      -mkb
    2. Re:Empty, meaningless, etc. by Jeremi · · Score: 1
      The root cause of all this me-me-me silliness seems to be a blistering lack of self-confidence in the general populace, creating a need to conform.


      And the real irony is, the "everyone else is a sheep, but I know better, I'm a unique individual who blazes his own path" meme is itself yet another form of social-control group-think. Of course you want to be unique and different from the crowd... advertisers have spent millions making sure you (and everyone else) knows just how important such individuality is. :^)


      More-cynical-than-thou,
      Jeremi

      --


      I don't care if it's 90,000 hectares. That lake was not my doing.
    3. Re:Empty, meaningless, etc. by srvivn21 · · Score: 1
      One might think that the extraordinary (and IMO ridiculous) efforts society puts into ensuring no one's widdle feewings are hurt might help people believe they are in fact worthwhile humans


      OTOH, perhaps putting so much focus on keeping peoples' feelings from being hurt puts a lot of focus on things that might (without this focus) go unnoticed, but (with the focus) are blown out of proportion and (ironically) cause said feelings to be hurt (not always in the "intended"* direction). Further, perhaps this process was not fully unintended. Who is more likely to pursue happiness via exercising their wallets, the secure and happy or the insecure and want-to-fit-in crowd.

      Heh. I seem to be wearing a tin-foil hat today.

      * The use of intended here indicates that the original (perceived) slight may not offend the parties that the slight is "aimed" at (e.g. those offended by the use of the term "gay" to denounce something as uncool are, often, not homosexual).
    4. Re:Empty, meaningless, etc. by aclarke · · Score: 1

      Have you ever DONE karaoke? I have, once, and I wouldn't say it's for those with "a blistering lack of self-confidence". Rant all you want, but in this case I'd mod you "off-topic" rather than "insightful".

    5. Re:Empty, meaningless, etc. by rob_squared · · Score: 1

      You may be wearing your cynical hat, but at least it's not pulled over your head, like the rest of us. One must be truly brave to face reality. Some organizations and religions can't even do that.

      --
      I don't get it.
    6. Re:Empty, meaningless, etc. by FlopEJoe · · Score: 1
      I donno... I can see your side but hear this.

      What if this thing, like karaoke, lets people do something slightly more daring than than they normally would? It's been said (and was in a Seinfeld bit) that peeps fear public speaking more than death and therefore would prefer being in the casket than giving the eulogy. I think anything that could get someone to step a little past their comfort level is a good thing. It gives confidence and brings them closer to the real world.

      Also, we can ridicule them to the end of their days when they crash and burn!

      PS. props on the C22 sig!

  21. Oh no, not again by PingXao · · Score: 1

    Scare-e-oke is bad enough. Does the world really need another flavor of delusion? Standard karaoke makes me ill. I have to summon all my energy when in a karaoke bar/setting/whatever - usually against my will - to not shout out loud: "You suck! Shut the f*ck up!"

    Now people who aren't funny will be just as annoying as those who can't sing. They all think they're great, though.

    1. Re:Oh no, not again by jcuervo · · Score: 1
      Standard karaoke makes me ill. I have to summon all my energy when in a karaoke bar/setting/whatever - usually against my will - to not shout out loud: "You suck! Shut the f*ck up!"
      After enough drinks, one fails to repress this urge.

      It is unclear whether or not this is a good thing.

      I'd like to think it is.
      --
      Assume I was drunk when I posted this.
    2. Re:Oh no, not again by tgbrittai · · Score: 1

      Friends don't let friends karaoke.

      Take their microphone, call a cab or do whatever else is necessary. Just don't let them karaoke!

      They will thank you!

  22. I'd Choose Steven Wright by Phat_Tony · · Score: 3, Interesting

    The more monotonous and boring the delivery is, the funnier the material seems.

    --
    Can anyone tell me how to set my sig on Slashdot?
    1. Re:I'd Choose Steven Wright by Feynman · · Score: 1
      The more monotonous and boring the delivery is, the funnier the material seems.

      Exactly.

      About a year ago...

      No, that was yesterday.

  23. Three words - - Timing is everything by jwf24 · · Score: 2, Interesting

    I head a piece on NPR's (This American Life, I think), about karaoke bars who have comedy routines in addition to the regular songs. The comedy routines were never very popular, since 1) the materal was usually crapppy and 2) It's very difficult to read a joke for the first time without knowing the punchline and time it in such a way that is comes out funny... J

    1. Re:Three words - - Timing is everything by DustMagnet · · Score: 1
      It's very difficult to read a joke for the first time without knowing the punchline and time it in such a way that is comes out funny.

      Well if karaoke machines can correct your pitch, maybe the joke-e-oke should correct your timing.

      --
      'SBEMAIL!' is better than a goat!!
    2. Re:Three words - - Timing is everything by geoffrobinson · · Score: 1

      "Your an idiot"?

      --
      Except for ending slavery, the Nazis, communism, & securing American independence, war has never solved anything.
  24. More than meets the eye by JojoLinkyBob · · Score: 3, Funny

    Buddy Hacket, to Johnny Carson: "Ask me what the secret to comedy is."
    Johnny Carson: "What's the..."
    Buddy Hacket (screams): "TIMING!!"

    --
    -jc
  25. Slashdot expansion pack? by standsolid · · Score: 2, Funny

    Who will be the first to write a regexp magic script to scrape all of the +5 funny comments on slashdot and feed them into this program.

    It'll go over big at your next D&D gathering. But everyone would have already read/heard the jokes.

    --
    WTPOUAWYHTTOTWPA
    What's the point of using acronyms when you have to type out the whole phrase anyways?
    1. Re:Slashdot expansion pack? by Eric604 · · Score: 1

      In Soviet Russia expansion packs Slashdot.
      In Soviet Russia comedians laugh at audience.

  26. I remember..... by theVP · · Score: 1

    an episode of MST3K where in one of the side-show scenes, Dr. Forsberg's assistant built a virtual comedian device. He did fairly well, while wearing Dr. Forsberg-like glasses and hair. That is, until Dr. Forsberg came back from vacation, and exacted his revenge by "Inserting a couple of drunken hecklers", and watched the man cry.

    Damn, I need to get a life....

    --
    "No one is more miserable than the person who wills everything and can do nothing." -Emperor Claudius 10 BC - AD 54
    1. Re:I remember..... by geekoid · · Score: 2, Insightful

      isn't it Dr. Forester?
      The same name as the Dr. from "War of the Worlds" moovie?

      --
      The Kruger Dunning explains most post on /. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dunning%E2%80%93Kruger_effect
    2. Re:I remember..... by theVP · · Score: 1

      shit, you're right. I couldn't remember his name.

      --
      "No one is more miserable than the person who wills everything and can do nothing." -Emperor Claudius 10 BC - AD 54
  27. Technology is great, But give me a hand gun. by FinchWorld · · Score: 1
    Seriously, some inventors need to be shot, have you ever watched Pop idol? Now mix in you're average joe thinking he's a standup. People will think they're funny and will amplify it through the sound system too.

    Hopefully, with most karaoke type things, it will only take off in japan, so i won't know if they're joking, singing, ordering lunch or threatening to kill me, in anycase.

    --
    "I may be full of crap about this game, and I may be wrong, and that's fine." -Jack Thompson
  28. News Flash by BaudKarma · · Score: 1

    Just because people are laughing at you, that doesn't make you a comedian.

    --
    It's the land of the brave, and the home of the free
    Where the less you know, the better off you'll be.
  29. Now I've seen EVERYTHING by robyannetta · · Score: 1

    Stop the planet... I want off.

    --
    - Just my $0.02, take with a grain of salt, your mileage may vary.
  30. This guy should have his priorities straight.... by JJRRutgers · · Score: 1

    "It definitely felt like stepping into his shoes," Phillips said afterwards. "People seem disposed, just for a moment, that I was Andrew Dice Clay." I feel very sorry this man right now.

  31. Re:3 sentence fragments in a row? by Intron · · Score: 1

    William Shatner, is that you?

    --
    Intron: the portion of DNA which expresses nothing useful.
  32. Finger Food by ackthpt · · Score: 1
    What is wrong with airline food??

    Eaten at Wendy's lately?

    --

    A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
  33. I don't need this... by shredluc · · Score: 1, Insightful

    I just read slashdot posts modded +5, insightful for my daily laughs.

  34. Machine runs on Windows? by Gudlyf · · Score: 2, Funny

    "So the parrot says to the barkeep a fatal exception 0E has occurred..."

    --
    Trolls lurk everywhere. Mod them down.
    1. Re:Machine runs on Windows? by Jpunkroman · · Score: 1

      I went to a karaoke bar one time and the karaoke machine kept crashing every one or two songs. Then it would reboot, and lo and behold, it was a Windows Machine! All, it had to do was boot up and run one program without crashing! But it could not. However, for all I know the dude who ran it was downloading pr0n off Kazaa on the same machine when he got home.

    2. Re:Machine runs on Windows? by ghoda_x · · Score: 1

      "So the parrot says to the barkeep a fatal exception 0E has occurred..."

      Sounds like a parroty error to me...

      --

      Give me but one firm spot on which to stand, and I will move the earth.
      - Archimedes
  35. Soon to Come -- Choke-e-oke by Evil+W1zard · · Score: 3, Funny

    Where you can re-enact scenes from a list of famous movie and real life stranglers. A built in choke/gurgle track is added, timed perfectly to accent your strangling experience...

    --
    News Reporters Make Tasty Polar Bear Treats!
  36. Re:3 sentence fragments in a row? by rmallico · · Score: 1

    Denny Krane...

    --
    sig goes here!
  37. Poor Name by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    Considering the Japanese word "karaoke" means, literally "empty orchestra," it seems more fitting to call this thing something along the lines of "kara-jokey."

  38. Timing? by 93,000 · · Score: 1

    A built in laugh track is added, timed perfectly to accent punch lines.

    So you need to follow the exact rythm of the original track in order to hit the 'laugh spots'? I can't imagine how bad it would be watching someone play 'catch up' to the video monitor if they fell behind. Comedy really should be all about finding a rythym that works in that instance, not following one that is predetermined. Timing is EVERYTHING in comedy.

    Worst. Idea. Ever. If I ever see this live, I will be on the internet within minutes registering my disgust throughout the world.

  39. Finally by saboola · · Score: 1

    I always wanted a "Joey from Full House Simulator", but this is about as close as im gonna get. Now if only I can find a "Mushy music to go with the moral lesson I just learned simulator", my life would be complete.

    1. Re:Finally by StalinsNotDead · · Score: 1

      You will no doubt experience whatever negative afterlife awaits evil people for even mentioning that wretched abomination of a sit-com whose name needs to be forever stricken from human psyche.

      --
      Thanks to the internet, we can now all die alone together! -SomeWoman
  40. whose material are they using by yimmy · · Score: 1

    i saw this story and wondered if they would just have the big names or if they would have other smaller name hilarious comediaans there are guys out there that dont get much airtime that are hilarious jim norton, brian regan, rich vos, billy burr, pable fransisco, jim brueuer, paul mecurio, lewis black i could probably go on but my memory is shot

    --
    God is dead - Nietze. Nietze is dead - God.
    1. Re:whose material are they using by Excen · · Score: 1

      The shift key is your friend. . .

      That being said, I really don't think you could get away with a good Jim Norton or Lewis Black set without causing the FCC to bleed to death from rectal sphincter hemmorhaging.

      --
      "No beer until you finish your tequila!" -Leela's Dad
    2. Re:whose material are they using by yimmy · · Score: 1

      they should have no problem with the FCC, its not being broadcast anywhere. does the FCC have any problem with regular Karaoke that has curses in it?

      --
      God is dead - Nietze. Nietze is dead - God.
  41. no by geekoid · · Score: 1

    getting a 1000 dollars a night does.

    --
    The Kruger Dunning explains most post on /. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dunning%E2%80%93Kruger_effect
  42. As we all know from Fight Club... by nitehorse · · Score: 1

    Sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken.

  43. Gotta love the android humour. by TheLittleJetson · · Score: 1

    It's really _THE_ reason to watch STTNG re-runs. I even remember one of his jokes from this episode: When I was a boy, I was so ugly that I had to hang a pork chop around my neck to get the dog to play with me.

  44. should been... by Heem · · Score: 2, Funny

    should have been KARA-JOK-EY

    --
    Don't Tread on Me
  45. SNL's one funny, classy moment in last ten years: by wsanders · · Score: 3, Funny

    First show after Sept 11th:

    Lorne Michaels to Rudy Giuliani: "So can we start being funny again?"

    Giuliani: "Why start now?"

    --
    Give a man a fish and you have fed him for today. Teach a man to fish, and he'll say "WHERE'S MY FISH, YOU IDIOT?"
  46. When I first saw the headline... by frank_adrian314159 · · Score: 1

    ... I thought, "What the hell's so hard about becoming a Canadian?" And then I thought, "What the hell's so funny about making someone a Canadian?" And then I re-read the headline and my fun was over...

    --
    That is all.
  47. Am I the only one that read it "Joke-e-oke makes you Canadian?"

    --
    Viral software licensing is not freedom, it is in fact GNU/Socialism.
    1. Re:err by snooo53 · · Score: 1

      Is this some sort of new troll? Let's call it the "post a virtually identical comment 5 minutes after someone else does" troll. I'm starting to notice this a lot more lately....

      --
      The sending of this message pretty much inconveniences everyone involved.
  48. Re:WTF - auto-tuner by tomhudson · · Score: 1
    When he's talking about an auto-tuner for vocals, he's not talking about a guitar tuner.

    Links: http://radar.smh.com.au/archives/cover_story_comme nt/000070.html

    I'm a sound tech and I do a lot of work with musical theatre. Honestly, auto tuners are not so fantastic for those who know they're there and can hear the difference, they make the music sound deadset fake. A heads up as well for all the teenie boppers who thought their "Idols" and "Popstars" were so amazingly fantasitc.....you guessed it....often they are so "fantastic" due to the use of the auto tuner. Personally, I still think they sound crap, but hey, I just do this for a living....
    http://www.virtualfestivals.com/festivals/article. cfm?articleid=1167
    ('There's so many of you', observes singer, Tom Chaplain) the boy is in fine voice throughout. We're reliably informed he used an auto-tuner on his voice,
    http://www.barficulture.com/music/article.php/95/? Gubi comes off sounding flat and struggling to maintain consistency with his vocal chords. An overkill of the auto-tune FX doesn't help either. It's one thing lacing the auto-tuner to rhythmically correct vocals, it can enhance the result as witnessed in 'Sah Ruk Dha'. However, try decorating it over vocals which haven't been put together correctly in the first place and the result is, ahem, 'Chardhi Jawani'! All you had to dowas google singer vocal auto-tuner.
  49. Now I know for sure... by notherenow · · Score: 1

    Now I know for sure that /. is just an experiment. They want to know our reactions, and how far we are willing to go. Honestly, if it weren't for pure bordom, none of us would be looking for the latest gossip about the new things in the world. I can't take anything else here seriously. What next? Title reads: "Man discovers way to live off of elephant shit alone! "How sad... back to being bored ~~sigh.....

    --
    We all dance, we all sing.
    -The Streets
  50. Where was this when.... by Dracos · · Score: 1

    I could recite Denis Leary's No Cure For Cancer verbatim from beginning to end?

    Disclaimer: That was nearly a decade ago, I may or may not have a life now

    1. Re:Where was this when.... by rob_squared · · Score: 1
      "I may or may not have a life now"

      Now introducing QuantumLife! Be popular and anonymous all at the same time. $29.99 plus shipping and handling, slashdot subscription required.

      --
      I don't get it.
    2. Re:Where was this when.... by yimmy · · Score: 1

      Know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna get myself a 1967 Cadillac El Dorado Convertible, hot pink, with whaleskin hubcaps and all-leather cow interior and big brown baby seal eyes for headlights... yeah! And I'm gonna drive around in that baby at 115 miles per hour, getting 1 mile per gallon, suckin' down quarter pound cheeseburgers from McDonald's in the old-fashioned non-biodegradable styrofoam containers and when I'm done suckin' down those greaseball burgers I'm gonna wipe my mouth on the American Flag and then I'm gonna toss the styrofoam containers right out the side, and there ain't a goddamn thing anybody can do about it. You know why? Because we got the bombs, that's why. Two words: Nuclear #@*%'in weapons, OK? Russia, Germany, Romania, they can have all the democracy they want...they can have a big democracy cakewalk right through the middle of Tienamen Square and it won't make a lick of difference, because we got the bombs, OK? John Wayne's not dead, he's frozen! And as soon as we find a cure for cancer, we're gonna thaw out the Duke and he's gonna be pretty pissed off. You know why? Have you ever taken a cold shower? Well, multiply that by 15 million times, that's how pissed off the Duke's gonna be. I'm gonna get the Duke and John Casavetti and Lee Marvin and Sam Peckinpaw and a case of whisky and drive to Texas...

      --
      God is dead - Nietze. Nietze is dead - God.
  51. Joke-e-oke? by Pwned · · Score: 1

    Isn't that the blue ape from Rouge Trader that makes tools for the imperium using it's many digited fingers?

  52. As long as it doesn't do bad jokes like by Man+in+Spandex · · Score: 1

    in the episode where George stopped having sex and became really smart. He then decided to help Jerry with his assembly of one hour in front of the junior high. In the end George had sex and became dumb again so Jerry had to start it off and he goes

    Jerry: Hey kids, what's the deal with homework. You're not working on your home!
    Audience: boooooooooooouuuuu!

  53. Re:Is This Idiotic Or What? by Koiu+Lpoi · · Score: 2, Funny

    Sure, just use Text-2-Speech on Wiki After Dark

  54. Virtual Comedy by Reverend+Raven · · Score: 1

    Way back in the day, there was an episode of Mystery Science Theater 3000 that had an invention similar to this. They called it "Virtual Comedy". This idea (even down to the hecklers) is right out of this episode of MST3K. Life imitating art (imitating life).

    I fully support the realization of MST3K ideas into the real world. Now someone come up with talking robots out of spare parts and I'll be happy.

    PS: As someone who has always wanted be a standup comedian, but never that good at writing my own material this is a really cool idea. If it means I can get up and receite my memorized George Carlin bits infront of a crowd, man. I have no problem being a cover artist.

    --

    --Reverend Raven
    Desperate days demand dire deeds.
  55. Re:lets-talk-about-airline-food-for-a-moment by Hogwash+McFly · · Score: 1

    Now tell us the one that doesn't suck!

    /Stewie

    --
    Mother, do you think they'll like this sig?
  56. Incredible. by peacefinder · · Score: 1

    Mr. Incredible: "You mean you killed off real comedians so that you could pretend to be one?"

    Syndrome: "Oh, I'm real all right. Real enough to make you laugh! And I did it without your precious writers. Your oh-so-special timing. I'll give them jokes. I'll give them the most spectacular jokes the world has ever heard! And when I'm old and I've had my fun, I'll sell my inventions so that everyone can be funny. Everyone can be a comedian! And when everyone's a comedian... no one will be."

    --
    With reasonable men I will reason; with humane men I will plead; but to tyrants I will give no quarter. -- William Lloyd
  57. Jerry Seinfeld?!?! by feloneous+cat · · Score: 1

    Do people still know who he is?

    I hope I'm funnier that that...

    (... After reviewing previous postings...)

    Well, er, apparently not...

    --
    IANAL, but I've seen actors play them on TV
  58. Actually Sounds Like a Decent Idea by Delilah+Jones · · Score: 1

    Sure, bad joke-e-oke could be as bad as bad karioke.

    But think about it, people can work on their delivery without having to worry about their material (at least for the time being).

    I think what stops most people up is trying to do both at the same time.

    At least, I know I suck at it.

    (wait for laughter...)

    --
    http://augustwestproducts.i8.com
  59. Laugh Out Loud by FinalMidnight · · Score: 1

    The laugh track. The USA's contribution to humor.

    Yes, We of the world love to have marginally funny sitcoms stuffed down our throat. We've been loving it since "I Love Lucy". They are so funny! They must be, because the laugh track is there to tell us so!

    Thank you USA for sharing comedy the gold! Gems like "Joey". You truly have made the world a better place!

    --
    In the maelstrom of the chaos at the center of my mind, I taste the salt of sadness as I feel my soul unwind.
    1. Re:Laugh Out Loud by /dev/trash · · Score: 1

      Like the "Office' was funny.

  60. But according to the schoolyard song. . . by Excen · · Score: 1

    But according to the schoolyard song it's macaroni if you're Yankee Doodle.

    --
    "No beer until you finish your tequila!" -Leela's Dad
  61. Nothing New by spamguy · · Score: 1
    This, in my understanding, is nothing new. As in, they existed c. 1991. A This American Life episode featured comic routines on Karaoke machines. The episode in question can be listened to here...go to Act One.

    The routines available for play were collecting dust, with jokes so obsolete they were sometimes offensive. This segment is worth a listen just to hear the narrator crash and burn as he kills his routine.

  62. Nothing New Part II by spamguy · · Score: 1

    Yeah, yeah, now I just realised two people (at least) already brought up TAL. Guess once a story's a couple hours old, it's been analysed to a pulp. :)

  63. Alternatively... by Hortensia+Patel · · Score: 1

    If you ever aspired to be the next Jerry Seinfeld instead of the next American Idol. Maybe the product featured by Wired is just right for you.

    Alternatively, you might like to try the latest member of our "Punctuation" line: the all-new, best-selling Comma (TM).

  64. Unless... by SoupIsGoodFood_42 · · Score: 1

    It does Bill Hicks, and includes a cue when to swear at your audience, I'm not interested.

  65. Remember William Hung? by krunk4ever · · Score: 1

    Oh god. I can't believe this guy is still around. I just recently saw a commercial with him in it. Supposedly he's making 2 movies in Hong Kong and will be returning to UC Berkeley next year.

  66. I think I'll wait for... by IdJit · · Score: 1

    Apple to come out with the Joke-e-oke Shuffle.

    Now that'd be funny...

  67. Re:WTF - auto-tuner by MPHellwig · · Score: 1

    You are sure you did a google on that for yourself when you posted it?
    Or did you just read the headlines for the results and think well that is what I am talking about?

    Or perhaps what the gp was talking about is a function present in most "vocal effects processors" ...

    Now that is a device I do know and have used ,try to play Pink Floyd without it.

  68. so... by DoktorTomoe · · Score: 1

    And ELIZA makes me a psychiatric case...

  69. Re:WTF - auto-tuner by davidhan · · Score: 1

    Now all we need is an auto-timer to help talentless hacks with their comedic timing. You could even have different settings for it, like Gilbert Gottfried at one end and Stephen Wright at the other.

  70. This American Life by jmlyle · · Score: 1

    One of my favortite This American Life stories is Lost in Translation (5/30/2003, Episode 238), in which:

    Act One. The Chasm Between Comedy and Music. Why is it that karaoke machines only have songs on them? If what they do is take a version of a public performance and allow the rest of us to give our own interpretations of the material, why aren't there other options, like the "you talkin to me?" scene from Taxi Driver, or Martin Luther King's "I Have a Dream" speech. Jonathan Goldstein and producer Starlee Kine find out why, when they go to a karaoke club that has, along with all the songs, comedy routines for people to perform. (11 minutes)


    It's freakin' brilliant, with Jonathan Goldstein innocently picking a routine from the early 90's which happened to contain jokes about the first Iraq war and how incompetent Iraq is. Unfortunaetly, this was delivered just after bodies started coming home during the current fiasco. Also, I think there's some joke about Mike Tyson, but, of course, that was a little touchy, too, having just gone through the rape proceedings.

    Good stuff.

    --
    I have misplaced my pants.
  71. Re:WTF - auto-tuner by merlin_jim · · Score: 1

    Actually I was speaking of exactly the device that this post's gp mentioned... it's mostly standard rack equipment these days.

    Ever see the simpsons where they make a boy band and he uses a box in the back to make them sound like people that know how to sing? That episode was not far removed from actuality.

    --
    I am disrespectful to dirt! Can you see that I am serious?!
  72. Re:WTF - auto-tuner by tomhudson · · Score: 1

    Um, no ... used to play guitar and synth, had a bunch of pedals, etc., so I know that he wasn't talking about a stupid guitar tuner.

  73. Re:What is wrong?? by Eric604 · · Score: 1

    hmmM 8| You bastard! Now I want rocket powered boots! I feel a depression coming up.

  74. Re:American joke: by flynns · · Score: 1

    Aw, c'mon!! It was a -joke-!!

    ...bah. Some moderators have no sense of humor.

    --
    'If you're flammable and have legs, you are never blocking a fire exit.'
  75. People are just having fun by sorbits · · Score: 1

    If this was a bunch of computer geeks reenacting various keynote speeches held by Steve Jobs, maybe dressed in a black turtleneck, I think you'd see this in a different light -- it's about having fun!