Japan Probes Mysterious Vapor Eruption

Saeed al-Sahaf writes "From the BBC, Japan's Coast Guard dispatched aircraft Sunday to survey a 3,300-foot-high column of steam rising from the Pacific Ocean off the island of Iwo Jima. MSNBC has a nice picture. The vapor was reported Saturday after Japanese troops stationed on the small island observed the massive cloudy plume rise from the sea about 30 miles southeast of the island. 'It's highly likely that it's caused by an eruption of an underwater volcano,' Japanese officials said. But others are not so sure, and are speculating that Godzilla has awoken from its nap. Tokyo remains calm at this hour."

Comments

Apple testing new water-cooling solution?

[nokilli]

Looks like they were about to run out of Pacific.

I guess GHz really doesn't matter after all.

It's how high the steam cloud rises into the atmosphere that is the surest indicator of performance.

Re:Apple testing new water-cooling solution?

[Krankheit]

Yes, we are. The slightly overclocked Intel Pentium 4 chips we are using are speculated to cause enough smoke to trigger a mass extinction. We are testing our chips under water. We hope Japan doesn't get pissed off and raise the fees on memory manufacture for our machines, so we are giving Japan the first machine off the line free.

Re:Apple testing new water-cooling solution?

[Anonymous Coward]

On a scale 1 - 10, how old is Michael Jackson's new boyfriend?

GNAA sues the CDC for patent violations

[JismTroll]

GNAA sues the CDC for patent violations
GNAA sues the CDC for patent violations

San Francisco, CA - The Gay Nigger Association of America (GNAA) has filed an antitrust lawsuit against the Center for Disease Control (CDC) in US District Court for the State of California. They allege in their complaint that "for over two decades, the CDC has unlawfully continued violating our patent on G.R.I.D.S, or Gay-Related Immune Deficiency Syndrome, also known as The Gay Cancer, by engaging in a relentless, worldwide campaign to coerce citizens to refrain from hot man on man anal intercourse and called for use of the aforementioned name "AIDS" or "Auto-Immune Deficiency Syndrome".

The switch to AIDS -- which did not contain any mention of homosexuality in any form -- enraged gay heritage groups, who demanded a congressional hearing and vowed to defeat the CDC. In 2004, with the support of faggots and other groups whom the CDC had rankled, the GNAA submitted the lawsuit after promising a G.R.I.D.S. referendum.

"Homosexual black men invented G.R.I.D.S. We brought it over from Africa by having anal intercourse with baboons and spread the love of G.R.I.D.S. in bathhouses across America. Not to give the gay black man credit for his sacrifice is in violation of our civil liberties. There is a very strong sentiment among homosexual men of African-American descent, or as they prefer to be called, Gay Niggers, that AIDS is an offensive acronym, and they understand its connection with bigotry and oppression of faggots in America," said Enid Pakistan, executive director of the state chapter of the Gay Nigger Association of America.

About G.R.I.D.S.

1981 saw the emergence of Kaposi's Sarcoma and Pneumocystis among gay men in New York and California. When the Centers for Disease Control reported the new outbreak they called it GRIDS (gay-related immune deficiency syndrome), praising the gay community as carriers of this wonderful gift to all of mankind. However, cases started to be seen in heterosexuals, drug addicts, and people who received blood transfusions, proving that the syndrome knew no boundaries, and that the hets wanted a piece of the action too.

About areems

Areems is the IRC handle of Armands Leimanis, a 15 year old Latvian boy with a poor grasp of English, and a strong grasp of Hebrew traditions.

About Latvians

Latvians are grotesquely obese, deformed goblin-like mongrels very closely resembling pigs. They practice Judaism and have a habit creeping into houses and stealing the foreskins of babies.

About GNAA:
GNAA (GAY NIGGER ASSOCIATION OF AMERICA) is the first organization which gathers GAY NIGGERS from all over America and abroad for one common goal - being GAY NIGGERS.

Are you GAY ?
Are you a http://academic.brooklyn.cuny.edu/history/dfg/core /negro.jpg"> NIGGER ?
Are you a GAY NIGGER ?

If you answered "Yes" to all of the above questions, then GNAA (GAY NIGGER ASSOCIATION OF AMERICA) might be exactly what you've been looking for!
Join GNAA (GAY NIGGER ASSOCIATION OF AMERICA) today, and enjoy all the benefits of being a full-time GNAA member.
GNAA (GAY NIGGER ASSOCIATION OF AMERICA) is the fastest-growing GAY NIGGER community with THOUSANDS of members all over United States of America and the World! You, too, can be a part of GNAA if you join today!

Why not? It's quick and easy - only 3 simple steps!

• First, you have to obtain a copy of GAYNIGGERS FROM OUTER SPACE THE MOVIE and watch it. You can download the movie (~130mb) using BitTorrent.
• Second, yo

Who is Driving?

[Anonymous Coward]

Bear is driving!
How can that be(first post)?

Taco night at the US base?

[digitalamish]

Come on, you know you wanted to post that...

Re:Taco night at the US base?

[Anonymous Coward]

You're thinking of Okinawa.

I for one...

[Tanmi-Daiow]

welcome our new steam-spewing Godzilla overlords.

Re:I for one...

[Parham]

...So you suspect there is more than one also!! I think there'll be one for every continent, I'm so scared.

Re:I for one...

[Anonymous Coward]

Don't worry, the French Secret Service will rescue us. They've done it before.

Re:I for one...

[theJerk242]

ut others are not so sure, and are speculating that Godzilla has awoken from its nap

It can't be Godzilla. It HAS to be Gamera!

He is friend to all children. He is made of turtle meat and is really neat!

obligatory

[Digitus1337]

I for one welcome our new... what have I become? :-/

Re:obligatory

[Anonymous Coward]

I for one welcome our new... what have I become? :-/

A troll. Thanks for playing.

Oops.

[Limburgher]

Excuse me!

I suspect this may about to become the single longest thread ever dedicated to fart jokes. . .

Re:Oops.

[Anonymous Coward]

Godzilla has gas?
I thought he had bad breath.

I saw this one

[DanielMarkham]

Isn't this the one where Mothra shows up and kicks Godzilla's butt? Can you imagine going over that in a ship? That would be a heck of an ocean ride. Everybody's suits would be wrinkle-free.

Re:I saw this one

[Anonymous Coward]

Mothra's the spirit of forgiveness!

Re:I saw this one

[StarsAreAlsoFire]

Can you imagine going over that in a ship?

There was a test done once, the details of which I cannot recall exactly as I don't know that I ever knew them. The gist of it was that they set of some high explosives far below a ship. A large ship. The point was to see if the 'bubbles' would do any damage to and/or sink the ship.

Well, the surface of the ocean turned to massive frothing abyss, and the ship disintegrated. I don't know if that means the test was a success or a failure ;~)

Anybody has details I'd love to hear about 'em -- this is third hand 'knowledge', and may be BS.

Re:I saw this one

[Solder Fumes]

The ship would sink, depending on how much steam there was. Basically, the density of the water is greatly reduced by all the bubbles. It's the density of water that holds the ship up. Sailing into this thing would be like dropping into a hole in the ocean.

Re:I saw this one

[shogun]

Well, the surface of the ocean turned to massive frothing abyss, and the ship disintegrated. I don't know if that means the test was a success or a failure

I can't imagine that happening. What I would expect to happen is for the ship to drop to the bottom of the ocean as the aerated water suddenly became unable to support the ship...

Re:I saw this one

[hysma]

There was a test done once, the details of which I cannot recall exactly as I don't know that I ever knew them. The gist of it was that they set of some high explosives far below a ship. A large ship. The point was to see if the 'bubbles' would do any damage to and/or sink the ship.

I saw a program that had something similar to this called "Disaster Detectives" I believe. They wanted to see if a release of bubbles could sink a ship. Turns out they didn't do much if directly under. However if the bubbles were off to the side, they would create enough of a splash to spill into the ship and sink it.

Re:I saw this one

[Mateorabi]

There is also a theory that evaporating/subliming methane deposits can also sink ships due to the aerated water not being dense enough.

There is also speculation that the Bermuda Triangle has lots of these unstable deposits. Would explain a few things.

Re:I saw this one

[__aaxtnf2500]

Modern torpedos detonate at a significant distance from the keel of a surface target, as the initial expansion wave carries a significant portion, but not all of the potential energy the torpedo can generate. By detonating the torpedo at a deeper depth, the explosion can evacuate the water from under the keel, using the ships own weight against its (explosively) weakened structure. This effect can be seen in most of the SINKEX videos floating around the net. The ship disintegrating would be from the explosive force, not rising gases.

Re:I saw this one

[Wraithlyn]

Wouldn't explain the cases where they find the ship, but no crew. :)

Re:I saw this one

[Anonymous Coward]

...or planes

Re:I saw this one

[Anonymous Coward]

Thanks for the pointer. Here's a nice series of pictures with an explanation describing the effect you describe.

I had shown these pictures to many people. My 12 year-old son, Greg, pointed out to me something no one else had noticed. He said, "Dad, there's no fire in that explosion".

I guess this wouldn't make it in hollywood.

The explosion happened underwater. The ship was split by the gas bubble generated.

Re:I saw this one

[EnderWigginsXenocide]

If you get enough gas into a liquid you'll lower its density to a point where a boat will no longer be boyant enough to stay afloat. Boats only float when they are less dense than the medium they float in (this includes airspaces,not just the wood and metal.)

Re:I saw this one

[StarsAreAlsoFire]

I think you might be right about the source of the story I mentioned, after looking at some pics (thanks be to the AC child-post on this level).

Re:I saw this one

[StarsAreAlsoFire]

... or the gravitational anomaly... ;~)

Re:I saw this one

[BillyBlaze]

Random speculation - if the density of the bubbles was not regular over the hull of the ship, the hull would be subjected to forces it would not normally encounter. The Titanic broke in half when upended - it wasn't designed to withstand that kind of torque. Possibly related, torpedoes are more effective when the detonate near and under their target, because the bubble they create somehow does enough damage to offset the less-direct shockwave.

Re:I saw this one

[dfjghsk]

Actually, Lloyd's of London and the Coast Guard has determined the Bermuda Triangle to be no more dangerous than any other piece of the ocean.

More info in wikipedia

Re:I saw this one

[crawling_chaos]

I suggest that you look for a copy of the sadly out of print The Bermuda Triangle Mystery: SOLVED. A librarian in Texas pulled things like the actual weather reports and did statistical analysis on the so-called Triangle and found a few key things:

• The "ghost ship" stories like the Marie Celeste are drunken sailor's tales. There is no record of such a ship even being built.
• Most of the "clear weather" disappearances, like the TBM Avengers, actually happened during foul weather. No reporters bothered to check the actual weather records.
• Quite a few "Bermuda Triangle" disappearances occurred well outside of the triangle, such that it needs to be redefined as pretty much the entire South Atlantic.
• And finally, when you factor out all of these circumstances, the unexplained loss rate is average for an area with that much shipping traffic.

I would furthermore add that since the advent of GPS and more reliable marine radio, we sure haven't heard much noise from the Graveyard of the Atlantic.

Re:I saw this one

[Shimbo]

Quite a few "Bermuda Triangle" disappearances occurred well outside of the triangle, such that it needs to be redefined as pretty much the entire South Atlantic.

And in some cases, portions of the Pacific as well.

Re:I saw this one

[Savant]

While I'd agree in principle with the "no more accidents than expected given the shipping traffic" it seems odd that your librarian claims the Marie Celeste (or Mary Celeste, as it was before Conan Doyle got his hands on it) never existed.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mary_Celeste

Wikipedia seems to give an identifiable history with a lot of detail for both the ship and captain.

Re:I saw this one

[sik0fewl]

Wikipedia seems to give an identifiable history with a lot of detail for both the ship and captain.

That article was probably contributed by drunken pirates.

Re:I saw this one

[Anonymous Coward]

In the interests of balance here's a reaction to "The Bermuda Triangle Mystery: Solved" that points out some flaws with the way that book was written.

Debunkery

Re:I saw this one

[PakProtector]

Arrr, matey! Ye be claimin' ye've seen a sober pirate?! *hiccough* Arrrr...

Re:I saw this one

[fingerfucker]

The "ghost ship" stories like the Marie Celeste are drunken sailor's tales. There is no record of such a ship even being built.

So how come they found it?

Re:I saw this one

[fingerfucker]

[...] seen in most of the SINKEX videos [...]

Um... did anyone else read that as "KINK SEX videos"...?

SORRY... sorry....

[Brad1138]

Nothing to see here, I was swimming there and..uh... well.. I had beans last night.

Re:SORRY... sorry....

[spectre_240sx]

Ahh, that explains the brownish residue in the water as well.

Oh no.

[Silverlancer]

I'm worried. Tokyo might be destroyed by the impending eruption.

At least the Japanese have experience. I mean, Tokyo's been destroyed at *least* 500 times before hasn't it?

Re:Oh no.

[king-manic]

I'm worried. Tokyo might be destroyed by the impending eruption.

At least the Japanese have experience. I mean, Tokyo's been destroyed at *least* 500 times before hasn't it?

Thats just Karmic revenge for being complete bastards from 1895-1945. All japanese people living during that time have been reported as being re-encarnated as butt plugs to punish them for being one of the most evil conquers since Ghengis Khan.

Re:Oh no.

[Anonymous Coward]

cool down, Tokyo is known as "the city wating to die". this eruption is just Earths safety valve. Prolonging tokyos trepidation.

Re:Oh no.

[Dan the Intern]

Tokyo, AKA "The Match-Stick City."

Re:Oh no.

[Dan the Intern]

Source: http://lum-chan.bbox.org/info/animelaw.html

#11 - Law of Inherent Combustability
Everything explodes. Everything.

First Corrallary
Anything that explodes bulges first.
Second Corrallary
Large cities are the most explosive substances known to human science. Tokyo in particular seems to be the most unstable of these cities, sometimes referred to as "The Matchstick City".

Re:Oh no.

[NanoGator]

"Thats just Karmic revenge for being complete bastards from 1895-1945. All japanese people living during that time have been reported as being re-encarnated as butt plugs to punish them for being one of the most evil conquers since Ghengis Khan."

What's funny is if this comment was about the USA, it'd have been modded up. I can't wait until that fad passes.

Re:Oh no.

[Anonymous Coward]

you're thinking of hiroshima.

Re:Oh no.

[freeweed]

Tetsuo!!!!!

Kaneda!!!!!

(Repeat ad infinitum)

Re:Oh no.

[king-manic]

"Thats just Karmic revenge for being complete bastards from 1895-1945. All japanese people living during that time have been reported as being re-encarnated as butt plugs to punish them for being one of the most evil conquers since Ghengis Khan."

What's funny is if this comment was about the USA, it'd have been modded up. I can't wait until that fad passes.

Hmm.. Some sensitive pro-Japanese people I see(white Otaku). Perhaps they don't know about the history of Japan from 1895 till 1945. The raping of asia, the fact all their neighbors still hate them for the things they did during that period of time. There's nothing flamebait/troll about it. The japanese of that time were very indutrious but were horrible horrible people. I can understand maybe a 1 over rated but truly -1 troll/flamebait is a bit much. It is fatually accurate. During that 50 year span there have been few empires as evil. Arguably the Nazi's were more civilized then the Japanese of that time.

Re:Oh no.

[PakProtector]

Let's face it. If Tokyo wasn't destroyed every sixth months by Godzilla, Japan would rule the world!

Re:Oh no.

[Lizzy_Bee]

Suddenly I want to listen to Blue Oyster Cult. I don't know why... (tee hee) Lizzy

It's It's It's Godzilla

[infonography]

And he ordered the Extra Hot Curry platter.

Re:It's It's It's Godzilla

[HermanAB]

Hah, never saw a sig from 'Heavy metal' before!

Its the terrorists!

[Anonymous Coward]

The terrorists are testing their new super weapons off the coast of Japan!

WE MUST ATTACK JAPAN IMEADIATLY!

No, wait... the pacific ocean!

YES! WE MUST ATTACK THE PACIFIC OCEAN IMMEADIATLY!

The pacific ocean is harboring terrorists and we CANNOT let that stand! GO DUBYA GO!

Re:Its the terrorists!

[Anonymous Coward]

The pacific ocean is harboring terrorists and we CANNOT let that stand! GO DUBYA GO!

At least he would try to go after them, unlike if Gore or when Clinton was in charge. Those leftist peacenick pussies would call for understanding and love, when a good nuke attack would be the answer instead.

Re:Its the terrorists!

[Anonymous Coward]

Bah, that means nothing to the Bush administration. Tell them the ocean is harboring P2P pirates. They will take action.

Re:Its the terrorists!

[Anonymous Coward]

Right, and Bush is the other extreme killing innocent little children... rahter have Clinton in the office smoking POT then bush in t office preaching his Christian bull shit and killing people.. I thought murder was agains the 10 commandments...

Re:Its the terrorists!

[Anonymous Coward]

"Ay-rabs aren't real people... Can't murder people who ain't real." -- American Conservatards

Re:Its the terrorists!

[apachetoolbox]

well if the pacific ocean was downloading movies or music the US would have already thrown it in jail.

Re:Its the terrorists!

[Anonymous Coward]

when a good nuke attack would be the answer instead.

And then americans wonder why everybody hates them...

Re:Its the terrorists!

[Anonymous Coward]

Wasnt clinton who favored his albanian
thieves/murderers/muslims over the serbs, and
bombed yugoslavia, destroyed bridges,factories,
pharmaceutical industries,etc?

Or wasnt Clinton who helped the muslim
bosnians (with the help of the arab countries
ofcourse) destroy what was left from
former yugoslavia?
Back then the afghan taliban volunteers
were the good guys fighting on the side
of their .... 2m tall, blonde ... bosnian
muslim brothers!!!!????

Why you yankies have to forget THAT quickly?

Re:Its the terrorists!

[le_defaut_tragique]

That's just irresponsible and inflammatory. Go away. -c

Re:Its the terrorists!

[Anonymous Coward]

the white room is waiting













we have always been at war with east taliban

Run run run!

[Anonymous Coward]

Ballmerzilla is attacking!

Giant catfish farted !

[zymano]

Mmmmmm mmmmm smell so good.

Snow Crash

[TerranFury]

Steam clouds rising from the Pacific? The Coast Guard better be careful or else some guy in an inflatable raft will make them listen to Reason.

Re:Snow Crash

[Loren_Burlingame]

E:FB

Re:Snow Crash

[Feyr]

Reason will prevail, there's no doubt about it

Re:Snow Crash

[Pwned]

I always say that. "listen to Reason" very few people get it. Stupid luddites.

Re:Snow Crash

[MichaelSmith]

...will make them listen to Reason.

Only if he is using the right patchlevel

Re:Snow Crash

[ab762]

Ultima Ratio Regnum - the last argument of kings.

Damn... Japan Still Exists

[linsys]

"Japan's Meteorological Agency said there was no danger of tsunamis, sometimes caused by undersea seismic activity. Iwo Jima is about 700 miles southeast of Tokyo."

I was hoping to say goodby to their continent...

Disclaimer: This is just a joke, please if you are Japanese don't "BLOW UP" at me.. ;)

Re:Damn... Japan Still Exists

[Anonymous Coward]

i'm not japanese and i'm still wondering wtf the "joke" part is.

Re:Damn... Japan Still Exists

[Anonymous Coward]

I am japenese and you are racist guinea pig you chubby hedgehog!!!!!!!!!!Go eat your socks racist badger muffin!!!!!!!

Re:Damn... Japan Still Exists

[Anonymous Coward]

Because your'r a fucking idiot, I read this and could tell what the joke was, not it looks like it's U.

Re:Damn... Japan Still Exists

[Anonymous Coward]

M3=j4p4n33s3.....m3 th1nk u a l0s3r! h0w u l1ke 1f m3 s4y m3 bl0w up 4m3ric4

disclaimer: me say dis no threat to america...only joke...amen and good night

Re:Damn... Japan Still Exists

[Anonymous Coward]

1 W0u1d s4y p134$3. 1 w4nt t0 m0v3 t0 m3x1c0

Re:Damn... Japan Still Exists

[Anonymous Coward]

Okay, where is the joke genius?

dumbass.

Re:Damn... Japan Still Exists

[Anonymous Coward]

This is NOT A TROL.. this is funny shit.. guess /. can't handle it..

Re:Damn... Japan Still Exists

[ScrewMaster]

So, in other words, they don't know what this is but they're sure it won't cause a tsnunami.

Okay.

"In other news, Japan's Seismological Agency said it would be a good idea if people didn't stand quite so close to the shoreline."

Re:Damn... Japan Still Exists

[Anonymous Coward]

Look at your penis... your chink fucker.

Giant boiling water thingy

[Rosco P. Coltrane]

Time to get a very large teabag...

Re:Giant boiling water thingy

[svallarian]

I'll give you a very large teabag. Just keep sleeping on my couch.

Re:Giant boiling water thingy

[jaltoids]

It is salt water fool....

Lemon and butter would be more usefull, think of all the poached crab and fish arround there... YUM

Re:Giant boiling water thingy

[lukew]

LOL

You've made my day

Re:Giant boiling water thingy

[Anonymous Coward]

Boston style

The water is friggin red!

[htrp]

Someone explain why the water in the picture looks red/brown?

I for one am slightly disturbed at this, is this normal for an undersea eruption?

Re:The water is friggin red!

[Rosco P. Coltrane]

Someone explain why the water in the picture looks red/brown?

Probably hematite, sulfur compounds and ashes coming from the volcano. They must be mixing with the water on the ocean floor and rising with the columns of hot water.

Re:The water is friggin red!

[dhazard]

Just a guess, Brown from the sulfur? Red from the lava? That my guess.

Re:The water is friggin red!

[istartedi]

Because volcanos usually send up a lot of smoke and ash and crap (that's the technical term for it). The crap would usually put a lot of smoke in the air, especially from anything that burned. Since this is under water, any minerals such as iron and sulfer that might react due to the heat of the volcano, along with organic matter from dead fish, seeweed, coral, or whatever might be on the ocean floor doesn't turn into smoke. Instead, it dissolves into the water and turns it some nasty foul color, in this case reddish.

Re:The water is friggin red!

[Nosferatu Alucard]

The brown is most likely dirt being stirred up from the ocean floor. If you have ever seen a boat docking or setting sail, the water does that as well around the turbines.

Re:The water is friggin red!

[jim_v2000]

It really isn't a volcano. It's actually the site where a tanker carrying Thai Hot Chilli Sauce went down!

Re:The water is friggin red!

[mattjb0010]

Someone explain why the water in the picture looks red/brown?

See here.

Re:The water is friggin red!

[TheStonepedo]

mmmmmmmm Sriracha! I go through a bottle of that stuff every month. So much better than "cajun" hot sauce.

Re:The water is friggin red!

[Threni]

But is it as good as Encona?
http://www.enconasauces.co.uk/flavour.asp

Re:The water is friggin red!

[Anonymous Coward]

I'm amazed, you managed to get modded +5,Informative with a post that amounts to total and utter bollocks. Well done!

Note to taco: the moderation system doesn't works when moderators are retarded. If this post isn't proof, I don't know what is...

Mitsubishi F-2 Versus Godzilla

[reporter]

This scenario presents an ideal opportunity to deploy a squadron of F-2 fighter/bombers to combat Godzilla or the Chinese naval fleet.

The F-2 is the new Japanese frontline fighter and employs stealth technology developed by Japanese engineers. The F-2 is distinctly inferior to the American F-22 but is a source of pride for the Japanese military.

In about 5 years, Tokyo will deploy the new F-2 Super Kai, an improved version of the F-2. The Japanese military has already released pictures of a preliminary model. It should be quite effective an slaying Godzilla or the Chinese military.

The pictures of the F-2 Super Kai are awesome. What's this? I'm salivating.

Re:Mitsubishi F-2 Versus Godzilla

[mgs1000]

Eh, they'll be buying F-35s in 10 years.

Re:Mitsubishi F-2 Versus Godzilla

[griffjon]

Robotech reference time!
When's the VF-1 coming out?

Re:Mitsubishi F-2 Versus Godzilla

[Zancarius]

The F-2 is the new Japanese frontline fighter and employs stealth technology developed by Japanese engineers. The F-2 is distinctly inferior to the American F-22 but is a source of pride for the Japanese military.

It's inferior because it's an F-16 airframe with radar absorbent materials on the leading edges. At least, according to the Wikipedia article to which you linked.

The incorporation of RAM (ACs: insert lame computer-hardware related joke here) into an aircraft does not make it stealthy. Ever wondered why the F-117, B-2, and for that matter the F-22 look rather unusual? It is because shape is much more important than the coating.

Having said this, the F-16 (and derivatives) are nevertheless remarkable aircraft. I have heard that some of the more experienced F-16 pilots have been fairly consistent in out-maneuvering the F-22 in exercises. With the introduction of stealth technologies, it is a shame to see such an incredible aircraft see the end of its line. (I would've probably said this about the P-51, too.)

Re:Mitsubishi F-2 Versus Godzilla

[Anonymous Coward]

(ACs: insert lame computer-hardware related joke here)

OK, .....
I wanted to build a stealth computer but the RAM wasn't big enough to cover the motherboard.

Lame enough for ya?

Re:Mitsubishi F-2 Versus Godzilla

[myowntrueself]

"I have heard that some of the more experienced F-16 pilots have been fairly consistent in out-maneuvering the F-22 in exercises."

You mean 'out-turning', right?

(or should that be 'in-turning'. Ouch my head is spinning now remembering the old F16 Eagle simulator on the PC)

Re:Mitsubishi F-2 Versus Godzilla

[trublaha]

"This scenario presents an ideal opportunity to deploy a squadron of F-2 fighter/bombers [wikipedia.org] to combat Godzilla or the Chinese naval fleet." Why does this have anything to do with the Chinese naval fleet? When were the Chinese even mentioned?

Re:Mitsubishi F-2 Versus Godzilla

[Anonymous Coward]

It has come to my attention that your post uses my term "stealth" without my express permission as the owner or the word, please cease all use of my mark immediately and prepare to pay damages, you will be hearing from me very soon.

Be warned that I will police and protect the "stealth" mark against all.
-Leo Stroller

Re:Mitsubishi F-2 Versus Godzilla

[dabigpaybackski]

Why does this have anything to do with the Chinese naval fleet? When were the Chinese even mentioned?

It's just framebait, that's all.

Re:Mitsubishi F-2 Versus Godzilla

[Synkronos]

You have no chance to survive make your time

Re:Mitsubishi F-2 Versus Godzilla

[Anonymous Coward]

I think the programming team's head was spinning if they referred to an F-16 as "Eagle." That is the F-15's NATO designation; the F-16 is called "Falcon."

Re:Mitsubishi F-2 Versus Godzilla

[O.W.M]

The F-2 is the new Japanese frontline fighter and employs stealth technology developed by Japanese engineers.

You said stealth! See you in court...

Re:Mitsubishi F-2 Versus Godzilla

[myowntrueself]

no you are right the game was Falcon... it was so long ago. Ahhhh the days of CGA.

Re:Mitsubishi F-2 Versus Godzilla

[johnsmith2005]

> The F-2 is the new Japanese frontline fighter and employs stealth technology developed by Japanese engineers.

I hope you didn't just say stealth...

Re:Mitsubishi F-2 Versus Godzilla

[ciroknight]

Wait.. Japan has a military AND an air force.. nah you've gotta be yanking my chain on that one. ;)

Re:Mitsubishi F-2 Versus Godzilla

[ciroknight]

While the F-16 might be ever so slightly more manuverable by more experience pilots, our airforce is built and tasked by new and young labor. That means that tomorrow the F-22's will be outdated and the more experienced F-22's will beat the F-NN's.

The F-16 is truely a remarkable airframe, much as the Boeing 747 has been, but it really is time to get out of the 90's and move on to some more advanced, more fuel effecient, easier to fly and deal with machines.

Re:Mitsubishi F-2 Versus Godzilla

[Hard_Code]

But what about the JSF... as a taxpayer it seems to make much more sense to have 10 JSFs than 2 F-22s, no matter how good they are. The Discovery (or was it History) channels speciel on the Boeing vs. Lockheed competition for JSF was very interesting. The JSF VTOL is awesome.

Re:Mitsubishi F-2 Versus Godzilla

[Anonymous Coward]

meh, I was hoping that it would have a big shiny spoiler on the back, and some kanji vinyl stickers all over it...

but I bet it has one hell of a fartcan exhaust system.

Re:Mitsubishi F-2 Versus Godzilla

[PakProtector]

The Valkyrie is never coming out, due to the simple fact that we don't want to have to listen to a whiny little sixteen year old bitch singing such mind-warping 'classics' as "Stage Fright," "My Boyfriend is a Pilot," "We Will Win," "To Be In Love," etc.

On the other hand, I want a VT-1S. I know where all 57 controls are.

Re:Mitsubishi F-2 Versus Godzilla

[Durf]

Quit yammering on about airplane tech and just get to the point! Can these fighters stop the beast that's waking up beneath the waves?

Re:Mitsubishi F-2 Versus Godzilla

[Bobsledboy]

You are an awful awful man ;-P

Re:Mitsubishi F-2 Versus Godzilla

[fitten]

Well... without the F-22s to provide air cover and to gain air superiority over the target area, the 10 JSFs will tend to have a more difficult time performing their missions, stealthy or not, over an area that actually has trained, hostile air forces available.

shemales.co.nz

[Anonymous Coward]

if you want sexy shemales, you need to get into shemales.co.nz - SLASHDOT READERS GET YOUR SHEMALES FIX HERE!

Sounds like a nice island...

[RiotXIX]

Why is it uninhabited?

Re:Sounds like a nice island...

[Anonymous Coward]

Probably because Iwo Jima is a Japanese Naval Base, and you need special permission to go there, there are organizations you can pay to take you there but thats only once a year. Not to mention there is still live ordinance

Re:Sounds like a nice island...

[patio11]

The name means "Sulfur Island" and they didn't just decide to name it after an element because the cool names were already taken. Due to volcanic activity, the place constantly smells like rotten eggs, and looks like Hell relocated to the central Pacific. That was BEFORE the US and Japan fought a major battle over it, littering the place with unexploded ordinance (grandpa did his part cleaning it up, bringing two live artillery shells to his house as souvenirs, where they stayed undisturbed until he died... we then had to call the Chicago bomb squad twice in one week after we found them in the basement). Its still in a vaguely decent geostrategic position, but anything else you'd use an island in the Pacific (tourism, etc) for can be done better at Okinawa or Hawaii, or for that matter just about anywhere other than Iwo.

Re:Sounds like a nice island...

[kfg]

Why is it uninhabited?

Because nobody live there. D'oh!

KFG

Re:Sounds like a nice island...

[Anonymous Coward]

Let the earth just be for once, you freaking human. You don't have to consume and destroy every inch of this earth.

Re:Sounds like a nice island...

[Anonymous Coward]

geostrategic eh? as opposed to what? islands in space with strategic value?

DOH!

"Bloop monster" evolves to phase 2

[AndroidCat]

Tuning in to a deep sea monster (2002)
Scientists have revealed a mysterious recording that they say could be the sound of a giant beast lurking in the depths of the ocean.

Researchers have nicknamed the strange unidentified sound picked up by undersea microphones "Bloop."

I'm sure we'll soon get underwater Sound Surveillance System reports of a giant "Ahhhh!" sound.

Re:"Bloop monster" evolves to phase 2

[Anonymous Coward]

Here is the "Bloop" sound

http://www.pmel.noaa.gov/vents/acoustics/sounds/bl oop.html

Under...

[presidentbeef]

...pants explosion?

Gah, I can't believe I just posted that

War

[CmdrPuto]

War of the Worlds has come?

Re:War

[KajiCo]

if all the aliens come out looking like Tom Cruise, Michael Jackson and Rosie O'Donnel. We're fucked.

Re:War

[raider_red]

if all the aliens come out looking like Tom Cruise, Michael Jackson and Rosie O'Donnel. We're fucked.

I think I've already seen that movie. Oh, wait, that was real...

Re:War

[raider_red]

Nah, but Spielberg did arrange for some big marketing stunt somewhere in the Pacific.

in japan...

[Anonymous Coward]

Mysterious vapor probes you!!!

Will this be another Surtsey?

[leonbrooks]

If so, the Japanese can leave the Chinese islands to the south of them alone, and have this shiny new one instead. Problem solved.

Godzilla Godzilla Godzilla...

[KajiCo]

Oh no, there goes tokyo, go go Godzilla.

Endless fun on the ocean floor

[Rosco P. Coltrane]

dead fish, seeweed, coral, or whatever might be on the ocean floor doesn't turn into smoke. Instead, it dissolves into the water and turns it some nasty foul color, in this case reddish.

So basically what you're saying is, when an underwater volcano goes off, coral and seeweed all leave the surface and rush down to the bottom of the ocean to watch the event, as well as countless schools of fish passing by, only they get too close and promptly die, thereby creating a giant fruit de mer soup?

Interesting theory...

Re:Endless fun on the ocean floor

[Alsee]

So basically what you're saying is, when an underwater volcano goes off, coral and seeweed all leave the surface and rush down to the bottom of the ocean to watch the event

I'm sure the coral gets very tired by the time it swims down to the bottom :)

-

Re:Endless fun on the ocean floor

[Anonymous Coward]

I think that he/she is making a joke about the stupid idiots in the new "War of the Worlds" movie[1], who crowd around the emerging tripods, thus ending up as Purina Martian Chow.

[1] As opposed to the stupid idiots who paid money to watch this dreck.

they THINK it's a volcano?

[jim_v2000]

Come on people...you don't have to be a scientist to figure out that steam + discolored water = underwater volcano. I was in Hawaii a few weeks ago at Hawaii Volcanos National Park and I was lucky enough to see magma going into the ocean...that stuff puts out a buncha steam probably thousands of feet in the air and makes the water look discolored.

Re:they THINK it's a volcano?

[globalar]

Not to mention it is an near one of the most volcanically active regions of the world.

Re:they THINK it's a volcano?

[_KiTA_]

Yes, that's the most logcal answer. In fact, I'd say it's the most probable answer.

But it *could* be something else, which is why they won't say for certain yet. That's just the way it works -- you don't say something IS something until it's been scientifically proven.

Which, as I understand it, gives certain "Intelligent Design" "scientists" in Kansas all sorts of confusion...

Re:they THINK it's a volcano?

[grammar fascist]

Come on people...you don't have to be a scientist to figure out that steam + discolored water = underwater volcano.

They're scientists. They can't be 100% sure of anything, really.

Unless it's a methane lake on Titan. Or evidence of life on Mars. Or a new planet that "weighs" x metric tons orbiting a red giant.

Well, crap. It must be Godzilla, and I'm 100% sure of it.

Re:they THINK it's a volcano?

[Muhammar]

No - long before human came, they called this place R'lyeh.

(And stop making Godzila jokes; this makes Cthulhu very very angry.)

Re:they THINK it's a volcano?

[shobadobs]

But it *could* be something else, which is why they won't say for certain yet.

That's not a volcano. It's a space station!

This is a joke, right?

[l810c]

That plume is 3300 Miles high? So that mountain in the background is higher than Everest?

Re:This is a joke, right?

[typobox43]

The article... even the summary... states that it's 3300 feet high.

Re:This is a joke, right?

[kongit]

3300 ft. You ninny.

Re:This is a joke, right?

[Anonymous Coward]

That plume is 3300 Miles high?

Wow, that's several times higher than the space station.

Re:This is a joke, right?

[Anonymous Coward]

Your an idiot, right?

Re:This is a joke, right?

[Anonymous Coward]

Your an idiot, right?
No, you're an idiot.

On second thought

[jim_v2000]

Maybe it's not a volcano at all. I'll bet a tanker full of Thai Hot Chili Sauce went down there.

Later...

[Deltaspectre]

"Hey guys, did you see that floater?"

man it must suck to be in japan

[chadamir]

man, they are going to go back to the site on monday. Dont they know it's july 4th? Gosh, don't they get off for holidays?

Re:man it must suck to be in japan

[boomfart]

Why would Japan celebrate July 4th?. Do you take a day off on Feb 11 for kenkoku kinembi?. Hmm in the interest of cultral sensitivity I should celebrate every nations national day by taking the day off wonder if the boss will fall for it?.

Re:man it must suck to be in japan

[Anonymous Coward]

You *are* aware that the 4th of July is only an American holiday?

Re:man it must suck to be in japan

[chadamir]

sarcasm surrenders

Re:man it must suck to be in japan

[Anonymous Coward]

No, can you name the next English bank holiday ? Thought not.

Re:man it must suck to be in japan

[Anonymous Coward]

That used to be true, however now in the UK we celebrate our independence from the US (except Tony Blair, he doesn't).

no time like the present...

[j1m 5n0w]

...to visit Japan!

Re:no time like the present...

[Anonymous Coward]

Why does Megatokyo suck so bad?

ep.N..N?!

[Anonymous Coward]

*dep4rtures of one or the other

Bloop monster audio

[Anonymous Coward]

Here's the roar of the fearsome beast...

Play this with caution!! I am still quaking with terror and afraid to go near the water. Be afraid, be very afraid...

Steam

[ImaNihilist]

I hate Steam.

Re:Steam

[ShyGuy91284]

Why do I have the feeling your talking about the kind that comes from VALVe?

Re:Steam

[syrion]

If you've got Steam coming from a leaky VALVe, you really need to patch it as soon as possible. Structural damage and personal injury can result from such problems.

Re:Steam

[ShyGuy91284]

I beg to differ. a little bit of Steam from a leaky VALVe is part of what makes the fluid in the pipes so dynamic and constantly changing.

Re:Steam

[ImaNihilist]

Steam, steam the magical fruit. The more you play, the more you reboot!

Re:Steam

[Good Sumerian]

Yeah, whoever invented steam sucks! Ah, Dane Cook, truly a man among men.

look at the bigger picture

[anagama]

WA Post has an "enlargeable image" showing the plume from the side. I haven't found a bigger one yet. What I really want is video.

Re:look at the bigger picture

[anagama]

Google news Japan kanji for volcano search ... better pictures!

Yahoo news for Japan with the kanji search ... some with video. ;-)

appologies for the self reply.

Japan Probes Mysterious Vapor Eruption

[Anonymous Coward]

Japan Probes Mysterious Vapor Eruption

He who smelt it, dealt it.

Re:Japan Probes Mysterious Vapor Eruption

[CmdrGravy]

if you said the rhyme you committed the crime

Cool

[MSBob]

Looks like Japan just got some free energy from mother nature. Get some turbines over there and voila (nearly) free electricity. Especially if the geiser lasts for a while.

Do they really have to ask?

[Jubii]

The answer is quite simple actually: IT'S GODZILLA (R)(C)(TM) Aaaahhhh!!

Pentium V?

[Anonymous Coward]

This looks like testing of the new Pentium V chip.
I heard Intel was having some overheating problems with the chip.

Godzilla? Please.

[Anonymous Coward]

Can you say call of Cthulhu?

Re:Godzilla? Please.

[Anonymous Coward]

Is there a ring-tone for that?

Japan Still Exists

[linsys]

"Japan's Meteorological Agency said there was no danger of tsunamis, sometimes caused by undersea seismic activity. Iwo Jima is about 700 miles southeast of Tokyo."

Good thing Japan still is here... it would be a sad deay for american if we lost their great products...

I also didn't want to have to contribure to another tsunamis fund... good day for me... :)

R'lyeh!

[GreatRedShark]

Clearly, the stars are now aligned for Cthulhu to raise R'lyeh from the deeps and awaken his brethern!

Ia! Ia! Cthulhu Ftahgn!

It's Ms. Frizzle!!

[guardiangod]

You fools! That's no Godzilla!! It's obviously Ms. Frizzle and her gang of volcano-blowing students!

Now if the Japs finally capture the ever-elusive Ms. Frizzle and interrogate her...

No, this is obviously Vapor Man.

[Anonymous Coward]

Apparently he was not defeated, and has come back more powerful than ever!

http://www.moria.co.nz/sf/humanvapor.htm

POP ROCKS

[Anonymous Coward]

Its really simple a large container fell off a container ship years ago adn now the massive shipment of pop rocks is coming to the surface

Re:Batman Begins fo'real

[Anonymous Coward]

I always knew Batman was real! This is the part where the some people turn on the microwave emitter in the middle of the sea. Now, we wait for the microwave emitter to arrive at Gotham, and the Batman to start fighting.

*Runs off to watch the action with a bag of microwavable popcorn (hey, why not use the gadget to get the popcorn done?)*

So where's the Google Earth overlay?

[Namarrgon]

C'mon, somebody make with the neat imagery already...

Rinji news o moshiagemasu!

[edgarde]

Rinji news o moshiagemasu! Rinji news o moshiagemasu! Gojira ga Ginza hoomen e mukatte imasu! Daishikyu hinan shite kudasai! Daishikyu hinan shite kudasai!

It's called plant life!

[Anonymous Coward]

There are species of seaweed in the waters off Asia that are red and make the water seem red as well. No fancier theories needed than that. ;-)

That's no volcano

[l3ert]

Looks like Dagon's pissed off.

Extra credit problem

[sd_diamond]

This joke exists in a superposition of Godzilla Reference and WWII Reference states. Calculate the evolution of the wavefunction over time. Consider the influences of all other sources of humor to be negligible.

Nintendo Saves the Day!

[Anonymous Coward]

With their city-wide Reset Button!

google earth

[Anonymous Coward]

so where is the google earth kml link ?

I sure as hell don't

[MochaMan]

Oh yeah, laugh it up funnyman; you're not living here in Tokyo like some of us. How'd you feel if an angry lizard stomped your $2000/month 30 square metre (320 square foot) apartment into the ground? Do have any idea how long it's going to take me to replace my Hello Kitty collection?

Re:I sure as hell don't

[Anonymous Coward]

How'd you feel if an angry lizard stomped your $2000/month 30 square metre (320 square foot) apartment into the ground? Do have any idea how long it's going to take me to replace my Hello Kitty collection?

I'd say Godzilla's doing us a favour if he crushes your life-size inflatable Hello Kitty doll with "three working orifices". You sicko.

Actually, make that two orifices.... Hello Kitty doesn't have a mouth, does she?

Godzilla HAS awoken from his slumber!

[Anonymous Squonk]

He batted something like .370 in June!

Must be Longhorn starting to surface

[bursch-X]

What else could look like such a huge steaming pile of sh*t?

Iwo Jima?

[R3d M3rcury]

"[...] a 3,300-foot-high column of steam rising from the Pacific Ocean off the island of Iwo Jima. The vapor was reported Saturday after Japanese troops stationed on the small island observed the massive cloudy plume rise from the sea [...]"

Wait. Didn't we kick them off Iwo Jima? What are they doing back there? Didn't we leave a flag?

Those sneaky Japanese...

I think I'm sick

[Sheepdot]

Did the slashdot editors have to use the word "probe" in a story about steaming brownish goo?

NO!!!!

[AmoebafromSweden]

Its Ctulhu! We are doomed!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ctulhu

it is about 1KM plus or minus lots

[dominux]

3300 feet is an over precise figure because the estimate is in metric and someone has converted it for people who can't cope with the modern measurement system. The height of the column is in the order of magnitude of a kilometer.

I told you...

[TheUglyAmerican]

We shouldn't have pissed off the comet creatures with that deep impact thingy.

Mysterious Vapor Eruption in Japan?

[Kidbro]

Sounds like a Sony press release to me :)

The Day The Oceans Boiled

[johnsmith2005]

Is anyone else put in mind of the Channel 4 documentary "The Day The Oceans Boiled"?

It prophesied that global warming has a tipping point of no return when methane hydrates in the sea bed start to be released.

Let's hope it hasn't started eh?

Forget Godzilla

[DJNW]

It's probably Ry'leh rising!

Vapors???

[Khyber]

Ultraman, How many times I gotta tell you to quit pulling Godzilla's finger!

Hmm...

[ryanov]

He who smelt it dealt it, no?

Mod Parent UP

[jmichaelg]

The video is incredible. The surface roiling shown in the Yahoo video makes me wonder how far below the surface the eruption is taking place.

Re:Mod Parent UP

[anagama]

The roiling surface is something that really doesn't stand out in the photos -- when I saw that, I was amazed. I was lucky enough to watch these videos w/ a native Japanese speaker. Some of the commentary indicates that when this happened in 1986, an island formed but sank after a month. In the present situation, there are rock formations on the surface but they aren't staying in place -- rather, they are sinking fairly quickly.

Mod parent up.

[Anonymous Coward]

Funniest response to people ignoring a joke ever!

sattelite view

[Anonymous Coward]

would it be this one?
http://maps.google.ca/maps?q=tokyo&ll=34.085083,13 9.526024&spn=0.085127,0.120352&t=k&hl=en