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Writer: Why Watching the Original Star Wars Again Was a Bad Idea (cnet.com)

An anonymous reader writes: CNET's Michael Franco recently sat down and watched Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope again in preparation for the release of The Force Awakens later this week. His advice to anyone who's thinking of doing the same is to save your childhood memories and skip watching it again. Unlike wine, Franco doesn't think the movie gets better with age. He writes: " Since that first viewing, Luke, Vader and company have loomed large in my imagination, and clearly in the imaginations of many other adults introduced to the sci-fi franchise as kids. So have the rest of the characters, as well as the sounds of a lightsaber, a Wookiee and a TIE fighter and the idea that someday I would learn to control people through the power of suggestion and a wave of my hand. But it now seems that maybe all that got a little gilded in my memory."

400 comments

  1. wah wah wah clickbait by drinkypoo · · Score: 4, Insightful

    You can save yourself the trouble of this one if you just read thi quote:

    I know I've been spoiled by movies with bigger and bigger budgets over the years, but it seems like Lucas could have leveled up those costumes.

    If you're the kind of person who can't appreciate something as being from an era, because OOH FAST SHINY LOOK A SQUIRREL then OK, rewatching the original films may not be for you. Otherwise, they're still just as good (or not) as they were when they were new.

    --
    "You're right," Fisheye says. "I should have set it on 'whip' or 'chop.'"
    1. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Joce640k · · Score: 5, Insightful

      The original has been completely ruined by Lucas with all his remakes and extra scenes.

      Cutesy extra creatures _everywhere_, Han shooting second, that barf-worthy fake scene with Jabba The Hut... it completely changes the feel. And it's awful.

      Take all those out and it's still quite good.

      --
      No sig today...
    2. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by LaurenCates · · Score: 1

      Sadly, George Lucas could have used that advice.

      --
      Some people don't believe in fairies. I don't believe in The Patriarchy.
    3. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      OOH FAST SHINY LOOK A SQUIRREL.

      I wish these people would get off my damn internet.

    4. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Feral+Nerd · · Score: 4, Insightful

      The original has been completely ruined by Lucas with all his remakes and extra scenes.

      Cutesy extra creatures _everywhere_, Han shooting second, that barf-worthy fake scene with Jabba The Hut... it completely changes the feel. And it's awful.

      Take all those out and it's still quite good.

      What ruined Star Wars for me can be described with one word: Ewoks ... Everything else is a mere annoyance, even Jar Jar Binks.

    5. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      I just downloaded the despecialized edition so I could do just that--watch it as I saw it in the theaters (at least as close as possible now). Have no interest in the prequels or any of the other crap. Because of that I haven't watched them in a long time. I think they held up pretty well, esp. Empire, which is still clearly the best of the lot. I still hate the ewoks.

    6. Re: wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Google "Star Wars despecialized edition" and you will be good to go.

    7. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by segedunum · · Score: 4, Insightful

      What ruined Star Wars for me can be described with one word: Ewoks ... Everything else is a mere annoyance, even Jar Jar Binks.

      If you think the Ewoks are worse than Jar Jar then you won't find many who will go along with that one.

    8. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I watched all 6 episodes one weekend. I'm not a rabid SW fan but it was a lot of fun.

    9. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Z00L00K · · Score: 1

      I agree, no need to tweak some scenes, the shooting scene, adding Jabba and the Sarlacc change are all completely unnecessary.

      However I don't really mind the background effects where a few new animals were added in Mos Eisley, mostly since they were just side-effects.

      I don't mind enhancements where mishaps are corrected like misplaced items, people in wrong clothing or obviously flawed special effects in the originals - but don't change the special effects too much, just polish off obvious potatoes.

      --
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    10. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0
    11. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by cygnwolf · · Score: 1

      Less than ideal, but the most recent release included a dvd transfer of the old laserdisk masters. it's letterbox, not anamorphic, but at least it's the original move before old man Lucas vomited all of that CGI all over it.

      --
      Free Pie! The Pie is Also Evil!
    12. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      What ruined Star Wars for me can be described with one word: Ewoks ... Everything else is a mere annoyance, even Jar Jar Binks.

      Well, Star Wars have been a space muppet opera from the very beginning. The Evoks are episodic guests from Sesame ... Star ... Street

    13. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Joce640k · · Score: 2

      What ruined Star Wars for me can be described with one word: Ewoks ...

      Agree 100%. Ewoks is where I stopped watching.

      And "Ewoks" is basically what Lucas added to the original to ruin it.

      Not actual Ewoks but "Ewok" look and feel.

      Barf.

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      No sig today...
    14. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by MightyYar · · Score: 2

      They were the worst UNTIL Jar-Jar. They did spoil the anticipation felt after Empire, that's for sure. I was only 8 when that movie came out - but I was probably 9 or 10 before I saw it on TV. That's when I officially felt too old for Star Wars. And I was still playing with GI Joe and Transformers.

      --
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    15. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by ThosLives · · Score: 1

      Indeed! Even though I already had a couple copies of Star Wars IV-VI, I broke down and bought that release solely so I could have the non-special editions.

      --
      "There are a dozen opinions on a matter until you know the truth. Then there is only one." - CS Lewis (paraprhase)
    16. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by greenfruitsalad · · Score: 1

      oh come on...
      for the despecialise edition: telnet Towel.blinkenlights.com
      for the edition with extra colours and scenes: ditto, but use IPv6

    17. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by greenfruitsalad · · Score: 1

      s/lise/lised

    18. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Rei · · Score: 5, Informative

      If you take the prequels as canon then Obiwan is a really horrible manipulative liar in Ep 4. "Skywalker... now thats a name I haven't heard in a long time" - you mean since you chopped up his father and threw him into a volcano? "Vader betrayed and murdered your father" - we've always known that was a lie, but the fact that he was nearly Luke's father's killer and was lying about this raises it to a whole new level. The "pretending to never have seen the droids before" stuff, the "reluctant warrior" schtick when we know how he actually felt... there's no other way to interpret Ep 4 in conjunction with the prequels other than that he was feigning ignorance in an attempt to manipulate Luke into joining the rebellion in hopes of amending his earlier mistakes. And given that he'd lie (repeatedly) in order to do this... it makes you wonder whether it even was the empire who killed Owen and Beru, rather than Obiwan hiring someone to do it (not like there's any shortage of thugs for hire on Tattooine that he could have paid). I mean, seriously, "Only imperial storm troopers are so precise"? What sort of transparently false "evidence" was that?

      And Luke... what kind of moron was he? He's handed a deadly weapon he's never seen before and immediately points it at his head, then opens it and starts swinging it around... then basically converts religions within minutes of meeting Obiwan. Not just converts, but becomes a zealot, scolding Han about not believing in the force literally like half an hour after he first hears of the concept. His only demonstration of "the force" at that point was having seen Obiwan get an unknown person in a white suit to agree with him, when there's tons of alternative possible explanations for that. Quite simply, if Luke were alive on Earth today, he'd be recruited into a cult in no time flat. Could be quite easy pickings for a group like Daesh as well.

      --
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    19. Re: wah wah wah clickbait by Joce640k · · Score: 1

      Ha!

      LOL leave it to the "pirates" to get their video editors out and give the people what they actually want. Oh, yeah, they're the criminals.

      --
      No sig today...
    20. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Joce640k · · Score: 1

      How about where they added an "Ow!" where the stormtrooper bangs his head on the door?

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    21. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by rhazz · · Score: 4, Insightful

      The fact that this guy hasn't rewatched the movie since he was a kid implies he really isn't much of a star wars fan to start with - so why the hell would anyone care about his opinion?

    22. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Farmer+Tim · · Score: 1

      Clone soldiers have feelings too! Not much spatial coordination, of course...

      --
      Blank until /. makes another boneheaded UI decision.
    23. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by RabidReindeer · · Score: 5, Funny

      ... then basically converts religions within minutes of meeting Obiwan. Not just converts, but becomes a zealot, scolding Han about not believing in the force literally like half an hour after he first hears of the concept

      Soooo. Typical teenager, eh?

    24. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Feral+Nerd · · Score: 2

      What ruined Star Wars for me can be described with one word: Ewoks ... Everything else is a mere annoyance, even Jar Jar Binks.

      If you think the Ewoks are worse than Jar Jar then you won't find many who will go along with that one.

      I don't really care about Jar Jar Binks. He's a stupid comic relief character that went off the rails and he doesn't appear that often anyway. As annoying caracters go C-3PO annoys me way more than Jar Jar because C-3PO is just as cheesy but he has way more screen time than Jar Jar got (at least it feels that way to me but maybe that's because C-3PO annoys me more). Having said that, "Great teddy-bear Luau of Endor" basically ruined the second half of that movie when it could have been a cool jungle battle full of Wookies bashing storm trooper's heads in.

    25. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by JoeMerchant · · Score: 1

      If you really want to be disappointed in costumes, try to watch the Ewoks movies.

    26. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Legal.Troll · · Score: 0

      On turkey day we watched a VHS version to avoid this.

      --
      "Outdated business models" is code for "I don't like paying for things, but want them anyway"
    27. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by drainbramage · · Score: 2

      That's not a potatoe.

      --
      No brain, no pain.
    28. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by oh_my_080980980 · · Score: 4, Insightful

      Lucas is that you? There is no one in the universe that thinks C-3PO was at all annoying in the original movies. Please stop. In fact the banter between him an R2D2 when they arrived on Tatooine was creative and funny. Again these are the original theatrical releases and not the prequels nor the modified crap that Lucas put out later.

    29. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by oh_my_080980980 · · Score: 2

      Exactly. The original stand the test of time. Hell my wife likes them. She loathes the prequels.

    30. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by oh_my_080980980 · · Score: 1

      "If you take the prequels as canon "

      No one does.

    31. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Cro+Magnon · · Score: 1

      The extra animals didn't bug me, but Han stepping on Jabba's tail was just stupid.

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    32. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      LOL "I was only 8, but the tantrum I had then has stayed with me to this day."

    33. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      >And given that he'd lie (repeatedly) in order to do this... it makes you wonder whether it even was the empire who killed Owen and Beru, rather than Obiwan hiring someone to do it (not like there's any shortage of thugs for hire on Tattooine that he could have paid).

      Mindblown.

    34. Re: wah wah wah clickbait by beltsbear · · Score: 1

      Check out the de-specialized versions.

    35. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by alex67500 · · Score: 1

      What ruined Star Wars for me can be described with one word: Ewoks

      You... You... YOU INSENSITIVE CLOOOOOOOOOOD!!

    36. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by William+Baric · · Score: 2

      We should care about his opinion BECAUSE he's not a Star Wars fan.

    37. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by MightyYar · · Score: 1

      I had a tantrum? No, I just didn't buy (or rather, whine until my parents bought) any Jedi toys. Everything is subjective, but it's pretty hard to find people who consider Jedi to be stronger than Empire.

      --
      W..w..W - Willy Waterloo washes Warren Wiggins who is washing Waldo Woo.
    38. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I know people love to hate the Lucas changes. But as a counterpoint, I will say that I like them. The transparencies added so that you can see out the windows in the cloud city, the additional creatures - it definitely adds to the ambiance. I'm with you on the whole "shot first" thing, but the rest of it adds to the movie and is quite nice. Change IS. Most times change is bad. Every once in a while change can be good and most of the changes to the original episodes were fine. The folks complaining about the changes are a broken record continually saying, "get off my lawn".

    39. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by aslagle · · Score: 1

      Search for Hamzy's "Despecialized" editions - he used HD sources, and got them as close to the theatrical editions as he could.

      It's the only version I keep on my shelf.

    40. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by drinkypoo · · Score: 1

      If you take the prequels as canon then Obiwan is a really horrible manipulative liar in Ep 4.

      He's only a spectacular liar about Vader, which admittedly is a pretty major thing to lie about. But the Jedi have always been manipulative, superior dickheads, so meh.

      I mean, seriously, "Only imperial storm troopers are so precise"? What sort of transparently false "evidence" was that?

      Well, there is this meme going around suggesting that when the troopers are missing our heroes, they're doing it on purpose so that the rebels can get caught up in a sting that goes horribly awry when the last Skywalker shows up. Vader senses a presence and storms out of the room, Ben gets killed and our heroes escape by flying casually away from something with big fucking guns on it. They let us go, that's the only explanation for our escape. Probably mangled that so no quote marks.

      I don't know if Lucas is that clever, but it's not a very high bar, so why not? The only place any of our heroes actually gets shot is in Episode VI, when there's no good reason to try to take anyone alive.

      --
      "You're right," Fisheye says. "I should have set it on 'whip' or 'chop.'"
    41. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Feral+Nerd · · Score: 1, Informative

      Lucas is that you? There is no one in the universe that thinks C-3PO was at all annoying in the original movies. Please stop. In fact the banter between him an R2D2 when they arrived on Tatooine was creative and funny. Again these are the original theatrical releases and not the prequels nor the modified crap that Lucas put out later.

      Lucas? Lucas came up with this tripe, the script writers came up with something mildly plausible and Lucas turned it into toy selling crap. Why would he be ragging on C-3O? As for C-3PO, what about the cheesy British accent? The fact that such an advanced culture as the one in Star Wars cannot create better hydraulics than so that C-3PO looks like he's got two peglegs and a crowbars stuffed up his robot ass when he walks? The endless cheesy " my circuits " whining?? It just gets tiring after a while unless you play that game where you divide the group of spectators into two teams where one has to take a shot of Whiskey whenever somebody says "Millenium Falcon" and the other a shot of Vodka whenever C-3PO moans about something or says 'my circuits'. After about the fourth or fifth shot of vodka the "Great teddy-bear Luau of Endor" actually starts to become mildly watchable once you get to it.

    42. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I felt that way about Jar Jar too, until this:

      https://www.reddit.com/comments/3qvj6w

      True? False? I don't care. In my head, Jar Jar is a now and undercover Sith playing a long con on the Jedi, which changes everything.

    43. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      That's why I have Harmy's despecialized original trilogy. Star Wars as it's supposed to be, but in HD. The best of both worlds.

    44. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by chrisgeleven · · Score: 5, Informative

      "Skywalker... now thats a name I haven't heard in a long time"

      He actually said that about the name Obi-Wan Kenobi, not Skywalker: https://www.youtube.com/watch?...

    45. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by thinkwaitfast · · Score: 1

      Some of us have the first release unmodified vhs tapes.

    46. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by pscottdv · · Score: 2

      When the scene was filmed, Ford walked around behind the actor playing Jabba while talking to him. Since they had established Jabba as a giant slug prior to deciding to put that scene back into episode IV, they had to figure out how to handle it. They couldn't cut the part where Han walks around behind him, because of the continuous dialog. The compromised by having him step on the tail.

      The stupid was not just leaving the scene out as they did for the original release. It adds nothing to Han's back story that our imaginations hadn't already provided.

      --

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    47. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by UnknowingFool · · Score: 1

      I was excited at first when George Lucas was going to make his special edition. To be fair some of the CGI and practical effects were dated. I would have been fine if he just altered those. For example, making Mos Eisley look more like a large spaceport than a dessert outpost was okay in my opinion. Making it look like teams of Stormtroopers instead of a handful of them were looking for the droids in the dessert was needed. It's when Lucas starting messing with the storyline: Inserting Jabba. Han shot second, etc. That's where it became a problem.

      --
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    48. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      And they're unwatchable. VHS was terrible.

    49. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Do you only care about the opinions of mindless fans who agree with you? That's how development arrests.

    50. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by BarbaraHudson · · Score: 4, Funny

      This is not the review you are looking for ...

      --
      "Transparent" is a shit show that trades on every stereotype going. A man in drag is NOT a transsexual.
    51. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by ConceptJunkie · · Score: 1

      Yeah, the Ewoks were too cutesy-poo and clearly there for kid-appeal, but if they'd been replaced by Wookiees, which I believe they were supposed to be originally, it would not have fundamentally changed the story. We might have has some better action scenes, but I don't think the movie would have been significantly different.

      On the other hand, without Jar Jar, the prequels would have changed significantly. Frankly, I never disliked Jar Jar as much as most people and I don't resent the idea of the character, just some of the execution. In a ranked list of reasons I didn't like the prequels, from biggest to smallest, Jar Jar probably wouldn't even make it on to first page.

      --
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    52. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Gr8Apes · · Score: 2

      I sat through RotJ because of the first two relatively great movies. RotJ seemed like a 20 minute serial with filler, being the Ewoks, and that filler was somewhere between terrible and horrible. A bunch of anthropomorphic stone age koala bears take down energy weapon toting enhanced sensor soldiers. What more needs be said?

      JarJar wasn't even what sealed the deal in ep 1, but the incredibly long winded childhood story. I did see ep 1 and 2 when they aired on TV in the 5 times a day rotation on one of the cable channels and you couldn't avoid it. You know - you just have to see the train wreck. And what a long winded train wreck it was. I'd say that ep 1 could be condensed down to less than 10 minutes of actual story, ep 2 maybe 20, if you're ok with a plodding pace, and hopefully according to others, ep 3 could fill the final 25-30 min required for a single hour TV show with commercials. Note: I have not seen ep 3, just snippets. Vin Diesel is an Oscar contending actor compared to what I saw there.

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    53. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by cyberchondriac · · Score: 2

      Return of the Jedi became pretty much, "Revenge of the Muppets". That's when it all started going downhill.
      I do think the anti Jar-Jar hype is over the top, (he was annoying but I've seen worse) but everyone has to be on board with it now, because of the "racist" connotation.. despite the fact that other characters (the Trade Federation) who seemed to be little more than shallow caricatures of Asians didn't so much as raise an eyebrow.

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    54. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by ConceptJunkie · · Score: 2

      I thought the theory was much stronger with Yoda as the undercover Sith, but in either case, it would have been an instance of a character being revealed to be to someone radically different than we realized, which underscored many of the best plot points of the original trilogy, but were starky (in comparison) absent from the sequels, unless you count Padme's "stunt double" and I don't. That added nothing to the story and could only have served to confuse viewers.

      --
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    55. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      These aren't the prequels you are looking for. Move along.

    56. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      They cut it out in the theatrical release originally. So your claim they couldn't cut the scene is patently false.

    57. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      He does come off as a petulant teen for most of the movie...which makes Han Solo's "shut up kid" stuff so funny.

    58. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by operagost · · Score: 1

      It also results in EXACT DUPLICATES of two lines. Because the Jabba scene was cut, some of the lines from that scene were added to the one with Greedo. Maybe the Greedo scene was even written in to replace Jabba's; I don't know.

      --

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    59. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Gr8Apes · · Score: 1

      You've got to look at the times this was created, regarding hydraulics etc. After all, you can build an interstellar faster than light starship that can be fixed with a spanner?

      But regarding C3PO, he and R2D2 were fine in the first 2 movies as they were relatively novel at the time. The 3rd movie was crap, so any scene including the moronic ewoks is already suspect and only served to ruin other characters. And I agree, I think we all wanted to see a planet full of wookies bashing storm troopers heads in and other antics. It would also have been somewhat believable in the universe that was created by the previous 2 movies, and would have been a suitable ending to nice trilogy.

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    60. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by RavenLrD20k · · Score: 1

      Jedi started out with the strength of Empire; the middle mostly held it together; but then they went to Endor. The movie would have been able to hold its own much better against ESB if they just cut out all the scenes on Endor and focused on the battle above it interspersed with Luke being further lead down the path to darkness by the Emperor.

    61. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by fuzznutz · · Score: 1

      [...] Empire, which is still clearly the best of the lot

      Empire is the least cringeworthy of all the movies for sure. There are some bad moments, but overall the best acting and dialog. However, my biggest complaint with the movie is that I felt like there was no real "complete" story. There was no central story arc. No common story thread to tie all the loose pieces together. No catharsis or resolution. It is just character development during which "some stuff happens" with a side story to introduce Yoda. Even that part was screwy with the nonsensical Darth Vader cave bit. What made it memorable was the dialog. It is very quotable.

      And the Empire really didn't strike back. It was pretty weak if they did. The rebels lost a temporary hideout/safehouse (before they could even unpack their shit and finish setting up camp) but they escaped pretty much unscathed despite facing an overwhelming armed force. Only Han suffered a bit, but yet survived for some reason. Why would the Empire allow him to survive but still be totally brutal and ruthless to the inhabitants of Alderaan, Oncle Owen, Auth Beru, Ben Kenobi, Captain Needa, and others? I guess consistency and continuity is not George's strong suit.

    62. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by SecurityGuy · · Score: 1

      "Only imperial storm troopers are so precise"? What sort of transparently false "evidence" was that?

      When I heard that I immediately thought "typical bad Lucas dialog". I don't think there's some grand alternate plot happening, I think it's just a really good story that isn't told that well. Imperial stormtroopers, it turns out, aren't that precise at all considering the number of times Luke/Leia/Solo+crew are shot at and not hit.

    63. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by ConceptJunkie · · Score: 2

      There were changes that I thought were fine and added to the movies. There were clearly places where they added details that were likely only left out originally because of budget or technical constraints. There were a couple of "beauty shots" of the X-Wings on their way to the Death Star that were a really nice addition, for instance. And fixing little mistakes, etc., is something I would whole-heartedly support. Or how the Emperor originally appeared like some weird bug-eyed muppet. Changing that was a good improvement.

      Of course, there were a lot of additions that were just dumb, or worse ("Greedo shot first" being probably the most heinous). Aside from all the other reasons people hate the change, I think one of the most ridiculous doesn't even get mentioned... Han Solo's head is missed by a blaster bolt hitting inches away and he doesn't even blink.

      --
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    64. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Gr8Apes · · Score: 1

      If you take the prequels as canon

      If we only could forget those exist, or somehow relegate them to pink pony status.

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    65. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Tell me about it. How many fucking college freshmen go home weekend number one telling their religious parents about how there's no such thing as absolute truth (because the 18yo misunderstood something in his Phil 101 class)?

    66. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by MightyYar · · Score: 1

      The Phantom Edit is worth a download. It's a cut-up version of Episode I that is not too bad. Episode I at least showed us why the Jedi were so cool - the first three movies... the Jedi did not really impress other than Mr. Emperor Lightning Bolt, and he wasn't even a Jedi.

      --
      W..w..W - Willy Waterloo washes Warren Wiggins who is washing Waldo Woo.
    67. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I honestly don't get the hatred for Jar-Jar. That character is a million times more realistic and well written than the nonsense Hayden Christensen performed...

    68. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by oldmac31310 · · Score: 0

      No. Don't search for that. Search for this if you must: Harmy's "Despecialized". Jeez, get the name right at least.

      --
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    69. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Reapy · · Score: 1

      Just saw a story today with someone putting out a "Despecialized" edition of starwars, which you should be able to find with some googling. They tried their best to remove all the 'fixes' added to the movies and do some color correction and a bunch of other stuff you'd probably like if really into that stuff.

      Also saw on youtube some recuts of the 'new' trilogy that tried to remove as much cheese as possible, and after skipping around them I think they do a pretty good job improving the movies as much as they could.

      Anyway didn't read clickbait article, but periodically rewatch star wars with the kids and still enjoy it. I especially like empire and the fight at the end, and honestly with age I get a bit more enjoyment out of it. As I got older I noticed that each section of the fight vader was trying to make a different point, from toying, to lessons, to dead serious frustration at the end. You don't need overly flashy choreography to tell the story, even within an action sequence, and I think empire does it really well there.

      It's like anything though, takes a bit of mental gymnastics to still appreciate media that doesn't hold up technically as well. I can look back at a lot of games I loved and still see how amazing they were for the time and understand why I used to spend hours on them. I can certainly do the same with movies, star wars included.

    70. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Sorry for the crossover intrusion, but your description of Obiwan sounds a lot like Dumbledore.

    71. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Cro+Magnon · · Score: 3, Funny

      Many people think the prequels should be shot from a canon.

      --
      Slow down, cowboy! It has been 4 hours since you last posted. You must wait another few hours.
    72. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by naasking · · Score: 1

      The original has been completely ruined by Lucas with all his remakes and extra scenes.

      Totally. Is there an edition that's just cleaned up to HD quality, with no extra CG?

    73. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Not only, but also ...

      He KNEW that Anikin was TOO OLD too learn the ways of the Force at FIVE YEARS OLD.

      Then he said he didn't want to give Luke the lightsaber until he was OLD ENOUGH - at EIGHTEEN.

      Then he attempts to start a TWENTY-YEAR-OLD down the Jedi path, after he WATCHED the FIVE-YEAR-OLD turn into the fucking Lord of the fucking Sith.

    74. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Jar Jar as a comic relief fails badly, Jar Jar as a exhibit piece of why the Republic failed works. Any civilization that makes senators out of pets deserves to burn. Episodes I-III are much more fun if viewed from the sith perspective, suddenly you see that all the good guys are complete morons, including the wannabe wise-old-men in the jedi council.
      Compared to that the original trilogy seems a bit flat, emperor completely fails to display the cunning he used to win the throne. 3D eye candy is completely irrelevant here, what makes or unmakes an ageless movie is the story and the humor, original trilogy just doesn't have that much, its pretty straightforward "good guys win because they are good guys and bad guys fail because they are supposed to". Stormtrooper aiming skills display that attribute of original trilogy best.

    75. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Torontoman · · Score: 1

      What ruined it for me was the explanation of the force being little invisible creatures.

    76. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      C-3PO was a whiny little bitch.

    77. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I had a tantrum? No, I just didn't buy (or rather, whine until my parents bought) any Jedi toys. Everything is subjective, but it's pretty hard to find people who consider Jedi to be stronger than Empire.

      You called? Empire dies after Hoth. Just keels over and dies. It's painful and boring at the same time. Jedi starts ok and gets better. if i want to switch a movie off after the first third, as I do with Empire, then there's no way I can call it a strong film, even if the opening is awesome.

    78. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0
      As far as Obi-wan is concerned he struck down Darth Vader on Mustafar. The man who had been his student and his friend for 13 years was gone.

      And as for Luke. You're really surprised that a teenager who has suddenly lost his family and his home clings to the ideal of his father as a Jedi for comfort and readily embraces it?

    79. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by adhdengineer · · Score: 1

      amen brother. preach it. etc.

    80. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by rycamor · · Score: 2

      I have had exactly the opposite experience as this "journalist". Upon re-watching Episode 4 after more than 20 years, I was struck by how superior the set design and and acting was to the prequels. Yes, it's nowhere near as glamorous or sheened to perfection by CGI, WHICH IS EXACTLY THE POINT. Everything had an authentic air to it that you just don't get later on. And this magic is strongest in the first two movies.

      I Tor'd the original Han-shot-first edition, of course, and watched it looking intently for any real gaps in continuity or jarring inconsistencies in the sets, costumes, etc... none. It really was a work of art, top to bottom, in spite of the low budget.

    81. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Matheus · · Score: 1

      I don't care about his opinion whether he's a Star Wars fan or not.

      On the grand scale of SW fans I'm by no means at the top but I've always liked the movies (even the ones everyone bitches about). No exact tally but I've watched every movie at least a half dozen times and the old ones many more than that including seeing all 6 movies first run in the theaters. Like the GP said this guy's point of reference is completely alien to me. Don't watch again because the movies won't live up to my memory? It's been no more than a couple years since I've watched all 6 and a few of them way more recently. My memory is just fine and watching them all again to have them be that much more fresh in my head is not something to be "worried" about. I know exactly what I'm getting into and given the /. audience I'm the rule way more than the exception.

      Ergo: This article is fine for the general public but terribly aimed for the /. crowd. Only the " Star Wars " makes it even remotely interesting for those here.

    82. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by war4peace · · Score: 1

      At the beginning: "Only imperial storm troopers are so precise"
      Further down the movie: Imperial storm troopers don't hit shit.

      I wonder how badly the other thugs were shooting. Would they miss an execution shot to the head from zero distance?

      --
      ...gis sdrawkcab (usually not responding to ACs; don't bother posting as AC)
    83. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by malditaenvidia · · Score: 1

      It is a great movie with fantastic characters, soundtrack and an engaging story. Even disregarding the special effects (which were revolutionary for 1977) those points alone put it above and beyond the incoherent remake/reboot garbage released today. Its longevity is proof of its quality. What's even worse about this chucklefuck of a review is that he probably watched the latest release with the spruced up special effects and silly Lucas edits, and not the raw original version.

    84. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by malditaenvidia · · Score: 2

      They were an analogy for the VC expelling the U.S. armed forces from Vietnam. Man, Star Wars is just too deep for you.

    85. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by malditaenvidia · · Score: 1

      Isn't it fun pretending the Ewoks were the only thing in that movie? Sorry but if you didn't think some of the best space battles in film history, a truly meaningful final duel between Vader and Luke and the Emperor at his emperor-est weren't great then you probably hate action films and I don't want to know you. And, hell, the ewoks weren't that bad. They didn't speak and were charming little fellows, certainly they're much better than the horror which was to come.

    86. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by malditaenvidia · · Score: 1

      Episode I at least showed us why the Jedi were so cool

      By acting like drunkards and prancing around with their glosticks like the queens of the rave? Joda lifting that X-wing from the swamp had more impact than the whole prequel trilogy crammed together.

    87. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by king+neckbeard · · Score: 1

      To be fair, the Jedi have a lot more empirical evidence than most other religions.

      --
      This is my signature. There are many like it, but this one is mine.
    88. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I must post this as AC.

      I confess. I have not seen the new Star Wars movies. I know... I did try to watch one and I fell asleep. Passed out, really. I was drunk at the time. It was a while ago, not long after it came out on DVD. I never did finish it. I do own them all (I think) but I've never watched them all. I did see the first three and i did see Ewoks and, seeing as I'm confessing my sins, I liked the Ewoks.

    89. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      And Luke... what kind of moron was he? He's handed a deadly weapon he's never seen before and immediately points it at his head, then opens it and starts swinging it around... then basically converts religions within minutes of meeting Obiwan.

      He was radicalised. There's no protection from being radicalised. Haven't you been watching the news????

    90. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by BitZtream · · Score: 1

      If you think the Ewoks or JarJar are what make or break the movies then you need to get out and enjoy the real world ... Take something for your silly hang ups on unimportant bits of a story, and to put it bluntly, get a fucking life, it's just a couple movies guys ... If those are the things you get hung up on then you've utterly missed the forest for the trees

      --
      Persistent Volume manager for Kubernetes - https://github.com/dwimsey/openshift-pvmanager
    91. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      You think that's bad? Luke, savior of the galaxy, had an active hand in crashing into a primitive people's culture (the Ewoks) and manipulating them into thinking C3PO was a god. The reason for this? So these primitive people would fight (and die!) for HIS cause. What a bastard!!! And these are the GOOD guys!

    92. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by The+Raven · · Score: 1

      Google for the Star Wars Despecialized release. Found on respectable torrent sites everywhere at high bitrates and resolutions. The original theater releases of the first three, retouched and restored with loving care by fans as disappointed with the Lucas edits as you.

      --
      "I will trust Google to 'do no evil' until the founders no longer run it." Hello Alphabet.
    93. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      HAH! Lol :)

    94. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by cstacy · · Score: 1

      LOL "I was only 8, but the tantrum I had then has stayed with me to this day."

      The tantrum is strong in this one.

      He will bring balance to the Slashdot.

    95. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Gr8Apes · · Score: 1

      I try to forget/skip most of the ewok crap in RotJ. It's not that they were the only thing in the movie, it's that they were in SO MUCH of it that it detracted from everything else. And yes, the prequels were incredibly terrible in every way.

      --
      The cesspool just got a check and balance.
    96. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by XxtraLarGe · · Score: 1

      The original has been completely ruined by Lucas with all his remakes and extra scenes.

      Cutesy extra creatures _everywhere_, Han shooting second, that barf-worthy fake scene with Jabba The Hut... it completely changes the feel. And it's awful.

      Take all those out and it's still quite good.

      That's why I bought the theatrical releases when they came out on DVD, just in case they decided to never release them again.

      --
      Taking guns away from the 99% gives the 1% 100% of the power.
    97. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by XxtraLarGe · · Score: 1

      If you think the Ewoks are worse than Jar Jar then you won't find many who will go along with that one.

      Maybe it is because I was 12 at the time, but the Ewoks never bothered me. Jar Jar annoyed me to no end.

      --
      Taking guns away from the 99% gives the 1% 100% of the power.
    98. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by thoromyr · · Score: 4, Insightful

      I take it you are completely unaware of the environment in which Star Wars was created. You might want to take a look at other movies and previous space opera.

      What Lucas actually wanted to do was Flash Gordon, but he got laughed out of the room and someone else got to make that one. But Lucas really wanted to do a Flash Gordon space opera, he had really enjoyed the serials as a kid.

      Now, watch those serials and you will see some of what Star Wars was trying to be. Except that Lucas did it better (no surprise, those serials were not exactly high budget productions and were old when Star Wars was new). In fact, Star Wars was phenomenal. No other scifi movie had been as epic as it was. The fact that it is a hodge podge of Flash Gordon, Hidden Fortress (e.g., c3po and r2d2 on tattoine), Doc Smith's Lensman, etc., is beside the point. No one else had made a movie like Star Wars yet.

      Maybe its because I was old enough to actually remember Star Wars when it came out, but people who were little kids are the ones who seem to have the most issue with it.

      BTW: my son loves Star Wars and likes the originals as well as the prequels. The reason he likes the prequels more is very simple: the first one stars a little boy. Little kids care less about flash than fun so the gorgeous cgi is wasted on him. Luke was young, but Anakin was close enough in age for him to project himself on to very well.

    99. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by hockpatooie · · Score: 1

      In fact, the Trade Federation characters' resemblance to Asian stereotypes did raise eyebrows, to the extent that their accents were changed after the first movie.

      But yeah, in hindsight Jar-Jar is probably no worse than the Ewoks.

    100. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Feral+Nerd · · Score: 1

      What ruined Star Wars for me can be described with one word: Ewoks ...

      Agree 100%. Ewoks is where I stopped watching.

      And "Ewoks" is basically what Lucas added to the original to ruin it.

      Not actual Ewoks but "Ewok" look and feel.

      Barf.

      Right, the first movie was great, the second one was OK, the third one was.... BAAAARRRRFFFF!!! The prequels that came later were kind of OK, not spectacular by any means and contained far too much slapstick. Star Wars was ruined when they turned the successful kind of cool "space western" into a giant commercial where the plot development was driven by the asinine marketing ideas of toy company executives. I kind of like the animated series better than the prequels and that is in no small measure due to the relative absence of the kind of asinine slapstick that ruined Return of the Jedi.

    101. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Carrie Fisher is homely at best regardless of the time period. Nice body, that she said got her the role, but homely.
      And Muppets for aliens? Oh come on... This was after 2010 A Space Oddity, not Le Voyage Dans La Lune in 1902.

    102. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      OP should turn in his Geek card, immediately.

    103. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by powerlord · · Score: 1

      ... Yeah, the Ewoks were too cutesy-poo and clearly there for kid-appeal, but if they'd been replaced by Wookiees, which I believe they were supposed to be originally, it would not have fundamentally changed the story. We might have has some better action scenes, but I don't think the movie would have been significantly different. ...

      I basically remember hearing that originally, it was supposed to be a planet of Wookies, but then Chewie had grown into this character that everyone saw as a competent second-in-command of a spaceship, so how were you supposed to sell Wookies as "primitive" (aboriginal?) ...

      ... Enter the Ewok

      (which just sounds like the name of a Kung-Fu/Star Wars crossover parody ... )

      --
      This space for rent. All reasonable inquiries will be entertained at proprietors discretion.
    104. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Bingo! Right here. I just need to put them in the VHS -> DVD convertor and have original DVD versions.

    105. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Bob+C.+Cock · · Score: 1

      And Luke... what kind of moron was he? He's handed a deadly weapon he's never seen before and immediately points it at his head, then opens it and starts swinging it around... then basically converts religions within minutes of meeting Obiwan. Not just converts, but becomes a zealot

      I don't know about you, but if someone handed me a lightsaber I'd go from atheist to believer in a heartbeat.

    106. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by MightyYar · · Score: 1

      Yoda slowly lifting a small ship was very cool to my 10 year old self, but did not really explain why the Jedi were feared and admired. Episode I showed them kicking ass and taking names.

      Maybe it was better left to the imagination, but I was trying to find some bright spot in that movie.

      --
      W..w..W - Willy Waterloo washes Warren Wiggins who is washing Waldo Woo.
    107. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by __aaclcg7560 · · Score: 1

      Check out the Anti Cheese Edit of the Star Wars prequel movies with 98% less Jar-Jar and 90% less cheese. Much better movies.

      https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=star+wars+anti+cheese+edit

    108. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Black+LED · · Score: 1

      And it's so dense! Every single frame has so many things going on.

    109. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Maxo-Texas · · Score: 1

      Absolutely. Jar Jar was the second best character in the movies that Lucas proposed making (it would have been nice to have seen them- much like the rumored Matrix sequels that were never made and the lost 5th season of Babylon 5.) From the sound of it, it's a good thing they were never made.

      With lucas directing, all the human actors would have been ground down except the actor who portrayed the emperor. I bet he would have done a good job. Jar Jar (much like Han, Leia, and Luke but also C3PO) would have elicited actual emotion and created character conflict. The proposed characters would have otherwise all been very bland, lifeless, just reciting lines and sitting down doing nothing when prevented from fighting by a forcefield between them instead of talking to each other and interacting. I bet Jar Jar would have even irritated the crap out of Qui Gon over a dinner scene.

      But the ewoks were terrible and didn't fit the tone of the rest of the star wars films. Wookies would have fit the rest of the film. And you could have had a few cute wookie kids without ruining the film.

      I didn't like the new effects added to Star Wars and I dispiseed the cop out on Han. The original star wars as seen in theatres holds up nicely for me.

      --
      She was like chocolate when she drank... semi-sweet at first and then increasingly bitter.
    110. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by aicrules · · Score: 1

      yeah that was pretty annoying. But I've rationalized it as the technology of the day (way better than what we have) they were far more scientific about the force than yoda and obi wan were about it in the originals. Perhaps midichlorians are just a physical by-product of the actual Force being present in you. But once New Hope comes around remaining Jedi have accepted that faith in the Force is more important than trying to understand it at that level. I know it's a stretch. But hey...

    111. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      One theory is that Obi-Wan is simply using his "Jedi mind tricks" to manipulate Luke into going along with him. That might explain why Luke, upon seeing his only parent figures dead right in front of him, just sort of shrugs and says, "Well, there's nothing for me here, now. Might as well join you on a quest." Nothing? Really? No funeral arrangements? No other friends or family members to inform? No concern for who's going to run this farm that employs some number of non-robot hired hands? (Owen says he can hire "more" next season, implying there are some hired now and droids are clearly purchased, not hired.)

      Nope. New religion. New quest. New life. Sell your speeder. Leave all your worldly possessions behind and run off to fight the empire. (Weren't you planning to join the Academy just the day before? Isn't that part of the Empire?) All this change results from the barest suggestion by an old man Luke barely recognizes. And then we learn that Obi-Wan can easily manipulate the "weak-minded" and it all clicks into place.

    112. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Altus · · Score: 1

      Why not just slaves. The crew on the ground could have freed a group of Wookie slaves that come to the rescue after the emperors trap is sprung. They don't have to be primitive. They could be taking guns from the storm troopers as they kill them. Would have been epic.

      That said I just rewatched Jedi and the woks aren't as bad as everyone makes them out to be. Still Wookie would be better.

      --

      "In America, first you get the sugar, then you get the power, then you get the women..." -H. Simpson

    113. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Seng · · Score: 1

      How flipping insensitive... a robot can't even be gay without someone cutting him down? Sheesh!

    114. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by rhazz · · Score: 1

      That's how development arrests.

      ...Star Wars development?

    115. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by lgw · · Score: 1

      I like Jedi better than Empire (though both seem like a couple of shorter movies cobbled together). My trick? I mentally replace all Ewoks with Wookies when watching, and suddenly the second half of the movie is fine.

      --
      Socialism: a lie told by totalitarians and believed by fools.
    116. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by lgw · · Score: 1

      I just pretend the Ewoks are Wookies an it's a good film. It's not a great film, though: the first 40 minutes or so is a different movie, and not just the location. The end has too many plot threads being intercut, making it a bit incoherent. But, damn, the space battle is epic - something about it makes it better than any of the scenes in the prequels.

      --
      Socialism: a lie told by totalitarians and believed by fools.
    117. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by painandgreed · · Score: 1

      "Only imperial storm troopers are so precise"? What sort of transparently false "evidence" was that?

      When I heard that I immediately thought "typical bad Lucas dialog". I don't think there's some grand alternate plot happening, I think it's just a really good story that isn't told that well. Imperial stormtroopers, it turns out, aren't that precise at all considering the number of times Luke/Leia/Solo+crew are shot at and not hit.

      Well remember that most of the time they were being shot at, they were purposely being herded back to their ship so they could "escape". If Gran Moff Tarkin had the foresight to put a tracker on the Millennium Falcon, don't you think he would have the same to instruct the stormtroopers not to hit the people he wanted to escape?

    118. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by painandgreed · · Score: 1

      They cut it out in the theatrical release originally. So your claim they couldn't cut the scene is patently false.

      I was going to say that he was probably specifically talking about the stepping on the tail part, not the entire scene, but I see that you are an AC, so you already knew that and are just trolling.

    119. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by painandgreed · · Score: 1

      I have had exactly the opposite experience as this "journalist". Upon re-watching Episode 4 after more than 20 years, I was struck by how superior the set design and and acting was to the prequels.

      Yes, but you wouldn't get the click count for an article that said it held up. Internet "journalism" these days means finding something people like, harsh on it, watch your click count go up from outrage. Much easier than providing actual content.

    120. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by drinkypoo · · Score: 1

      They couldn't cut the part where Han walks around behind him, because of the continuous dialog.

      Why not? They could have cut away to Jabba's face to see his expression, even though Han was talking. This is called a reaction shot * and it's done all the time.

      * I would have linked Wikipedia but for some reason the Wiki article on reaction shots claims that they rarely involve dialogue, which is bullshit.

      --
      "You're right," Fisheye says. "I should have set it on 'whip' or 'chop.'"
    121. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by xevioso · · Score: 1

      i see what you did there

    122. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Lodragandraoidh · · Score: 1

      I don't think that was bad dialogue. Think about a professional army vs. a rabble of random people. The professionals are trained to not only direct fire most effectively, but to also coordinate their fires by command from their leaders, section, squad, platoon, company etc, for that effect. Given that reality - I don't think Obiwan's statement is at all out of place. As for other things - his reticense about Luke's father etc - I saw that as an effort to spare the boy an overwhelming psychic blow...of course he died before he had time to tell him the truth - which lead to a nice plot device in the later movie.

      --

      Lodragan Draoidh
      The more you explain it, the more I don't understand it. - Mark Twain
    123. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by xevioso · · Score: 1

      I must be the only person in the universe that actually likes that scene with Jabba added in.

    124. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by pscottdv · · Score: 1

      Well, it's a big universe. Surely the only one on this planet, though!

      --

      this signature has been removed due to a DMCA takedown notice

    125. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by pscottdv · · Score: 1

      I should have mentioned that I was relaying what Lucas said in an interview I saw. Of course there are lots of things they *could* have done, none of which would have been nearly as good as the original decision to cut the scene entirely.

      But as for your suggestion. It's quite a long section of dialog for a reaction shot.

      --

      this signature has been removed due to a DMCA takedown notice

    126. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Nah, Nikon would have given better image quality.

    127. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by HornWumpus · · Score: 1

      Lucas had little kids when he made the bad 3. So he made movies for 4 year olds. Which is fine.

      But the first 3 were for 12 year olds, so there was some disappointment from the arrested development crowd that makes up Star Wars fans. They just weren't prepared to regress 8 years and some go themselves into a full tilt self righteous 12 year old rage.

      --
      John McAfee 'It was like that time I hired that Bangkok prostitute; to do my taxes, while I fucked my accountant'
    128. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by HornWumpus · · Score: 1

      C3PO was Dr. Smith from 'Lost in Space'.

      R2D2 was Huey, Dewey and Luey from 'Silent Running'.

      --
      John McAfee 'It was like that time I hired that Bangkok prostitute; to do my taxes, while I fucked my accountant'
    129. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by HornWumpus · · Score: 1

      Changing Jar-Jars name to Institatus would have saved the movie.

      --
      John McAfee 'It was like that time I hired that Bangkok prostitute; to do my taxes, while I fucked my accountant'
    130. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by HornWumpus · · Score: 1

      Offtopic.

      Also the worst things about the Hobbit movies. Whole scenes added as foundation for video game levels. Barf.

      --
      John McAfee 'It was like that time I hired that Bangkok prostitute; to do my taxes, while I fucked my accountant'
    131. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Z00L00K · · Score: 1

      I'm pretty neutral about it - it's a mostly redundant scene. The catch I have with it is that it's a CGI scene while all other scenes with Jabba aren't and it's too obvious.

      --
      If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker would destroy civilization.
    132. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Thing+1 · · Score: 1

      Luke Skywalker was a whiny little bitch! We just rewatched Ep. 4 a few weeks ago. Horrible!

      Then we see Mark Hamill in an episode of "The Flash" and he's at least consistent -- the character is also a whiny little bitch... Haven't seen him in much else, and don't really care to.

      --
      I feel fantastic, and I'm still alive.
    133. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Many people think the prequels should be shot from a canon.

      At George Lucas?

    134. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by userw014 · · Score: 1

      And Luke... what kind of moron was he? He's handed a deadly weapon he's never seen before and immediately points it at his head, then opens it and starts swinging it around...
      This movie IS from the 1970s after all. Lawn Darts weren't banned yet. We were just a decade or two away from chemistry sets with Uranium.

      That's just the way we rolled then. And if some of us shot ourselves in the face, well, that was a different kind of rolling.

    135. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      What's really amusing is watching the YouTube clips of C3PO and Darth Vader without the voices dubbed in.

      C3PO sounds like a Cockney used car salesman, and Vader sounds like... a northern git.

    136. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      WTF are you talking about...there are only three episodes plus the new one.

    137. Re: wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Fuck you Rick Burman. You ruined this too? You're- wait a minute... you're not Rick Burman... what is it with Ricks?

    138. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Cederic · · Score: 1

      Caution : Rickrolling.

    139. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      My parents told me that I wanted to be R2D2 after I saw Star Wars at age 2.

    140. Re: wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Agreed.

    141. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      If you take the prequels as canon then Obiwan is a really horrible manipulative liar in Ep 4. "Skywalker... now thats a name I haven't heard in a long time" - you mean since you chopped up his father and threw him into a volcano? "Vader betrayed and murdered your father" - we've always known that was a lie, but the fact that he was nearly Luke's father's killer and was lying about this raises it to a whole new level. The "pretending to never have seen the droids before" stuff, the "reluctant warrior" schtick when we know how he actually felt... there's no other way to interpret Ep 4 in conjunction with the prequels other than that he was feigning ignorance in an attempt to manipulate Luke into joining the rebellion in hopes of amending his earlier mistakes. And given that he'd lie (repeatedly) in order to do this... it makes you wonder whether it even was the empire who killed Owen and Beru, rather than Obiwan hiring someone to do it (not like there's any shortage of thugs for hire on Tattooine that he could have paid). I mean, seriously, "Only imperial storm troopers are so precise"? What sort of transparently false "evidence" was that?

      And Luke... what kind of moron was he? He's handed a deadly weapon he's never seen before and immediately points it at his head, then opens it and starts swinging it around... then basically converts religions within minutes of meeting Obiwan. Not just converts, but becomes a zealot, scolding Han about not believing in the force literally like half an hour after he first hears of the concept. His only demonstration of "the force" at that point was having seen Obiwan get an unknown person in a white suit to agree with him, when there's tons of alternative possible explanations for that. Quite simply, if Luke were alive on Earth today, he'd be recruited into a cult in no time flat. Could be quite easy pickings for a group like Daesh as well.

      Mostly wrong!

      and modded up as informative? What the fuck is wrong with slashdot here??

      1- the quote is "Obi Wan? Now that is a name I have not heard in a long time!" The name Skywalker is not uttered anywhere near that scene (Hand in your geek card now!)
      2- Obi-Wan made a defensive move ending the fight with Anakin/ProtoVader on Mustafar after repeatedly warning him "Don't try it" and giving him every possible chance to redeem himself. (I am burning your geek card and checking on who issued it to you in the first place so I can slap them with a large trout and burn their geek card.. and the geek card of whomever is sitting next to them!)
      3- "Vader betrayed and murdered your father" was said to be "True from a certain point of view" meaning that Vader, who was Anakin took over Anakin's better nature, meaning Anakin surrendered to his Id under the manipulations of Palpatine/Sidious. (Your geek card is burning brightly right now in the fireplace!)
      4- Obi Wan put Luke on the path of confronting Vader when he was ready, while some of this was telling him what he needed to hear, Obi Wan lying to Luke was a poor interpretation of the plot line of the original trilogy. If Obi Wan had lied to Luke, do you believe that Yoda would have been on board with it from the start? No, Yoda did play along, however neither "Lied" in terms that they ever made a direct statement that was not true.
      5-Luke needed no manipulation to join the rebellion, he had already been pestering Owen to submit his application to the rebel academy early .. don't believe me, re-watch the scene where they are eating over blue milk. (The scene where Beru says "He is not a farmer, he is too much like his father!" and foreshadowing the reveal near the end of Empire Strikes back, a dark look comes across Owen's face and he just says, in a very film noir kind of way "That is what I am afraid of!")
      6- Obi Wan did not have Owen and Beru killed, You are an idiot and it is questionable if you even watched these movies.. you just skimmed the cliff notes didn't you ? Moron!
      7- Yes Luke was clumsy with the

    142. Re: wah wah wah clickbait by Ginger+Unicorn · · Score: 2

      This week i watched the despecialised editions of the original trilogy on an 11 foot projector screen. Seeing them for the first time in years writ modestly large in HD i can say this: The low budget of Star Wars is very obvious when compared to Empire Strikes Back. It's still an astonishing accomplishment for the age and the money, but some of the effects and costumes look shaky as hell under the cold light of day. Luckily the inventiveness and ambition of them make the rough edges really charming and still evocative. Empire on the other hand is obviously much better than the other two. As a lifelong Star wars obsessive, i've always rated the original trilogy pretty evenly in terms of quality. But now it feels pretty obvious to me that Jedi is far too casual and played for laughs for any of the stakes to be felt. Apart from the space battle, which is stupendous, nothing ever lands as if any of the characters are taking any of it seriously, and no ever feels in any real danger. Everyone is acting like it's all a walk in the park. Contrast this with Empire, where they are always on the back foot, either running away or resignedly walking into what they assume is certain death. One other thing i noticed over all three films is that everyone is an asshole. Especially in the first one. Except for the very end they are just constantly rude and obnoxious to each other. In the other films they only seem to be nice to each other when they think someone is going to die. And Luke is just wall to wall arrogant in Jedi. The teddy bears picnic at the end of jedi felt like an anticlimax. It needed more, but not the pan pipe jubilee from the special edition. Something else. Not sure what. All that having been said, i still fucking love all three of them.

      --
      (1.21 gigawatts) / (88 miles per hour) = 30 757 874 newtons
    143. Re: wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Yes. Greedo did miss such a shot.

      *ducks*

    144. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      The Kenobi and Yoda were just pretty much just shits across the board. I think they managed to actually be either a liar in every major conversation with Luke.

    145. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      In fact the banter between him an R2D2 when they arrived on Tatooine was creative and funny.

      Only proving Star Wars fundies are humorless twats who are determined to pretend nostalgia doesn't exist for them. No Star Wars banter has ever been funny, except for maybe a few times in the animated productions.

    146. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by UnknownSoldier · · Score: 1

      > The Phantom Edit is worth a download

      Agreed -- definitely a great version.

      Is BitTorrent and/or P2P (eMule) the only place to download it now-a-days?

    147. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by greenfruitsalad · · Score: 1

      crap, i just realised it's Towel.blinkenlights.nl (.nl not .com)

    148. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by drinkypoo · · Score: 1

      But as for your suggestion. It's quite a long section of dialog for a reaction shot.

      Yeah, you'd have time to see his whole reaction. I guess that's not jump-cut enough for the MTV generation, though.

      --
      "You're right," Fisheye says. "I should have set it on 'whip' or 'chop.'"
    149. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      If you think the Ewoks are worse than Jar Jar then you won't find many who will go along with that one.

      Thanks for providing the best and clearest example of human herd mentality I've seen all week.

      On Slashdot, no less, a site whose userbase considers itself to be less sheeple-ish than the average person.

      Kudos.

    150. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by MightyYar · · Score: 1

      I think so. I bought my copy many years ago on eBay :)

      --
      W..w..W - Willy Waterloo washes Warren Wiggins who is washing Waldo Woo.
    151. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Reziac · · Score: 1

      Nonsense. With a good BBQ sauce, ewoks are delicious.

      --
      ~REZ~ #43301. Who'd fake being me anyway?
    152. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by dl_sledding · · Score: 1

      They were the worst SINCE Jar-Jar.

      FTFY - in-universe chronology.

    153. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by david_thornley · · Score: 1

      Not to mention that that Imperial installation would be taken down easily by the US Army of WWII. Anything that would be seriously bothered by those swinging logs would be hopeless against a M4 medium tank.

      --
      "When you have eliminated the unacceptable, whatever is left, however improbable, must be the truthiness" - Holmes
    154. Re: wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      If you're going to rip off Red Letter Media, at least give them credit!

    155. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by david_thornley · · Score: 1

      Remember the scene in Episode II or so where Obi-Wan and Anakin go into the bar, haul someone away, and tell everybody "Jedi business - go back to what you were doing?" It reminded me so strongly of the Gestapo "nacht und nebel" way of disappearing people.

      --
      "When you have eliminated the unacceptable, whatever is left, however improbable, must be the truthiness" - Holmes
    156. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by david_thornley · · Score: 1

      And, of course, Episode II tells us that Imperial stormtroopers are genetically identical near-perfect warriors.

      --
      "When you have eliminated the unacceptable, whatever is left, however improbable, must be the truthiness" - Holmes
    157. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by TsuruchiBrian · · Score: 1

      You are insane.

    158. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by TsuruchiBrian · · Score: 1

      Shouldn't you be drinking beer in a parking lot before a football game?

    159. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by TsuruchiBrian · · Score: 1

      So by your rating scale:

      New Hope: Great
      Empire *and* prequels: OK
      Jedi: Terrible

      Everyone is entitled to their opinion, but this is like saying: "Pizza is great. I don't really like Chinese Food, it's just OK. I also don't like to eat human feces, it's also just OK. Hamburgers are terrible."

    160. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by TsuruchiBrian · · Score: 1

      I feel like I've heard about an equal amount of accusations of racism for Jar-Jar and the Asian federation guys (being very little of either). The Asian federation guys were just not nearly as annoying.

      I do think the anti Jar-Jar hype is over the top, (he was annoying but I've seen worse)

      I also think the Jar-Jar hype was over the top, but I actually haven't seen worse. I think he was actually the worst character I've ever seen. He is not by far the worst. He is just the worst. Something has to be worst, even if nothing was ever bad.

      Who is a worse character than Jar-Jar Binks? I'm open to having my mind changed.

    161. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by TsuruchiBrian · · Score: 1

      Yeah I saw that family guy episode too.

    162. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Hey, nothing like a nice family vacation to the forest moon of Endor.

    163. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Wookie wookie and Jaja and ewok watch to the _dark side_ leads. Mooogly googly woogley goo. Brbrbrbrbrbrrrr (unintelligable)

    164. Re: wah wah wah clickbait by Black+LED · · Score: 1

      Nah, those hack frauds don't deserve the credit. :P

    165. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Mr.CRC · · Score: 1

      C3PO should act like an old man because he wasn't carefully manufactured in some high-tech. factory, but rather put together out of junk parts from a scrap dealer's heap by Anakin Skywalker.

    166. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by cyberchondriac · · Score: 1

      Who is a worse character than Jar-Jar Binks? I'm open to having my mind changed.

      Why? It's a subjective opinion, valid either way, not a matter of factual debate, unless you look at it statistically, maybe.
      In some ways, he reminded me of Roger Rabbit.

      --

      Look back up at my post, now look back down, you're on the Internet. Now look back up. I'm a signature.
    167. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by drinkypoo · · Score: 1

      Maybe its because I was old enough to actually remember Star Wars when it came out, but people who were little kids are the ones who seem to have the most issue with it.

      I am only old enough to have seen Episode VI in the theater, but I have no significant problem with any of the original movies. I would rather have had Wookies than Ewoks, but I'm not bent about it. Sure, they were cuddly, but they were also stabby.

      BTW: my son loves Star Wars and likes the originals as well as the prequels. The reason he likes the prequels more is very simple: the first one stars a little boy. Little kids care less about flash than fun so the gorgeous cgi is wasted on him. Luke was young, but Anakin was close enough in age for him to project himself on to very well.

      Anakin is the worst thing about that movie for me, because while I can remember what it was like to be a child, I'm not one anymore and shit acting won't fly. Worse than Jar-Jar, really, because you can mostly edit Jar-Jar out and the movie still makes sense.

      --
      "You're right," Fisheye says. "I should have set it on 'whip' or 'chop.'"
    168. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by drinkypoo · · Score: 1

      Then we see Mark Hamill in an episode of "The Flash" and he's at least consistent -- the character is also a whiny little bitch... Haven't seen him in much else, and don't really care to.

      Mark Hamill's voice acting for the Joker on Batman: The Animated Series is broadly considered to be some of cartooning's best voice work. Perhaps he's just typecast, as an actor. He played a whiny bitch so well in Star Wars that people will forever cast and direct him that way. It's still nice to get work...

      --
      "You're right," Fisheye says. "I should have set it on 'whip' or 'chop.'"
    169. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by thoromyr · · Score: 1

      My recollection is that Lucas was tired of Star Wars by the time Return of the Jedi came around and just wanted things to end. So he junked the plans he had had for another trilogy (with Luke's and Leia's children) and wrapped up loose ends by killing the love triangle (she's your sister, Luke!) and killing the emperor. The wookie to ewok transformation was an utterly transparent marketing ploy and their war against the storm troopers was laughably unbelievable. (At the same time, cuteness factor aside, I don't see it being that much different than the serials Lucas was trying to emulate.)

      As for the first trilogy, I didn't say that Anakin was my cup of tea. But anyone who doesn't understand the innate appeal to young boys doesn't understand them.

    170. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by TsuruchiBrian · · Score: 1

      I'm not trying to debate you. It's obviously subjective, to the point that you don't need to prefix "Jar Jar Binks is the worst" with "I think", because it's implied. I am just curious who you think is a worse character than Jar Jar Binks. Maybe it will be someone I agree is worse, but just didn't remember.

    171. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by drinkypoo · · Score: 1

      As for the first trilogy, I didn't say that Anakin was my cup of tea. But anyone who doesn't understand the innate appeal to young boys doesn't understand them.

      No, I get it very clearly, believe me. I'm just saying that the genius of the earliest movies is that Luke may be a whiny farmboy, but he's never as goddamned tedious as Anakin. You can enjoy it regardless of your age.

      --
      "You're right," Fisheye says. "I should have set it on 'whip' or 'chop.'"
    172. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Dripdry · · Score: 1

      See the Despecialized Edition. Download it, love it.
      You're welcome.

      --
      -
    173. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by cyberchondriac · · Score: 1

      In the Star Wars universe, or in general? I've seen worse outside the Star Wars realm. Within, I didn't really find him more annoying than say, the muppet thing that hung around Jabba In Episode IV and snickered a lot, though at least it got a lot less screen time than Jar Jar did. I found the Ewoks ridiculous for the most part too. Not sure if it' so much a case of "worse" or better, more like, "just as bad" I guess. The Trade Feds were silly too. I hope there's none of that in the new movie, so far, it sounds pretty good.

      --

      Look back up at my post, now look back down, you're on the Internet. Now look back up. I'm a signature.
    174. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by TsuruchiBrian · · Score: 1

      I was just thinking in general. I do agree with your point about screen time being significant. I think a lot of those characters might very well be much more annoying if they were major characters that we see throughout the whole film.

    175. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by thoromyr · · Score: 1

      ah, point taken.

    176. Re: wah wah wah clickbait by malditaenvidia · · Score: 1

      They don't call him Quigon GIN for nothin'. But seriously, while Mike Stoklasa did an amazing job putting together those reviews, he's merely encapsulating all the suffering and complaints most Star Wars fans had with the prequels. Also Star Trek fans with the Next Generation movies. And Cop Dog fans, I guess.

    177. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Minupla · · Score: 1

      If this bothers you, check out http://originaltrilogy.com/top... - this is the version my kid will be watching :)

      Min

      --
      On the whole, I find that I prefer Slashdot posts to twitter ones because I don't get limited to 140 chars before
    178. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Harmy's*

    179. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Rakarra · · Score: 1

      I think the scenes on Endor would have been fine if they'd stuck with the original plan and it was the Wookiee homeworld. Instead, the wookies got aged and shrunk down and became child-friendly Ewoks.

    180. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by Rakarra · · Score: 1

      Shut up, Rick! >|-(

    181. Re:wah wah wah clickbait by rtb61 · · Score: 1

      That would be Jar Jar Abrams I gather because that seems to be the new nick name developing for him after this lame remake of the first star wars movie. There are a lot of pissed off stars wars fanatics out there, even worse than the star trek ones. As for the red armed C3PO, yeah we get that, red matter, red arm, Jar Jar is not just giving trekkies the finger, he is giving them the whole arm, really lamely arrogant as Jar Jar is doing it with other people's money.

      Why you shouldn't watch the first Star Wars before watching this lame rehash because the first one had an interesting well told story and this took that story, mind boggling managed to dumb way down and did a real horrible job of telling it. I think Abrams will really regret doing star wars, Jar Jar what a nickname to carry for the rest of your life, ugh.

      --
      Chaos - everything, everywhere, everywhen
  2. Not the Original Star Wars by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Informative

    In TFA he says he fired up his Apple TV and rented the movie. This is not the original Star Wars. This is the Remastered Fifty Times George Lucas is a dick edition that is probably terrible. Go watch the Despecialized Editions and you might appreciate it more.

    1. Re:Not the Original Star Wars by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      This. I downloaded the Despecialized Editions awhile back and fired up the first one just to see how it looked. A few hours later I realized I had accidentally watched the whole thing instead, but it was well worth it, since it let me relive a piece of my childhood as if for the first time.

      The original movies (which are sadly best seen via the Despecialized Editions, rather than anything official, which isn't likely to change anytime soon since the rights to the original trilogy still belong to 20th Century Fox instead of Disney) hold up extraordinarily well.

    2. Re:Not the Original Star Wars by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      A million times yes.

      Earlier this year I re-watched the series for the first time since the prequels were in the theaters. I got the DE for the Original Trilogy and watched the series in Machete Order. Most importantly I watched the series with my six year old daughter and four year old son for the first time. Their experiencing what I did when I was six and saw SW for the first time repaired all the damage Lucas did to the franchise with the "re-releases" and the prequels.

      For anyone who loved the original but hates the prequels and re-releases, the Despecialized Editions and Machete Order are essential.

    3. Re:Not the Original Star Wars by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      "fired up his Apple TV"... I tried ad blockers but it seemed like every time I tried to block the ads they just got smarter.

    4. Re: Not the Original Star Wars by MarkH · · Score: 1

      I have all the vhs originals . I kept them and I did do end to end of the first 3. Worth keeping a vhs player for

    5. Re: Not the Original Star Wars by shoor · · Score: 1

      Worth keeping a vhs player for

      Get a TV capture card and digitize with mencoder before the tapes wear out.

      --
      In theory, theory and practice are the same; in practice they're different. (Yogi Berra & A. Einstein)
    6. Re:Not the Original Star Wars by antdude · · Score: 1

      Where can we see the despecialized editions legally?

      --
      Ant(Dude) @ Quality Foraged Links (AQFL.net) & The Ant Farm (antfarm.ma.cx / antfarm.home.dhs.org).
    7. Re: Not the Original Star Wars by h4ck7h3p14n37 · · Score: 1

      If you hunt around you may be able to find a DVD rip of the LaserDisc editions. I picked mine up many years ago from superhappyfun.com and got a copy of the Star Wars Holiday Special as a bonus(?).

  3. Not Everyone is Alike by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

    Just because this guy has become a cynical, unimaginative douchebag doesn't mean the rest of us have.

    I watched episodes 4-6 this past weekend and I enjoyed them every bit as much as I did when I was a kid.

    1. Re: Not Everyone is Alike by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Let me guess, you're middle aged and in a dead end career. Yearning for the 80s when mum made things make sense?

    2. Re:Not Everyone is Alike by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      He grew up, and realized that Star Wars is children's fare. Luke really is super-whiny, and 3PO really is much like Doctor Smith. Empire is the only one that's at all watchable.

    3. Re:Not Everyone is Alike by Cederic · · Score: 1

      They're shit. Crap acting, crap special effects (not for the era, but they've aged awfully - contrast to Blade Runner), frankly horrific dialogue.

      The plot is decent enough, holes aside, but the whole thing relies on the universe in which it's set. That's the fucking magic, not the films.

      The films are shit.

  4. George Lucas destroyed the movie industry .. by nickweller · · Score: 1

    'Michael Franco recently sat down and watched "Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope" again .. His advice to anyone who's thinking of doing the same is to save your childhood memories and skip watching it again..'

    I disagree, the subsequent prequels and the remade insertions into the original were a disaster. Not only that Lucas never went on to make another decent movie. Not only that Hollywood stopped making movies for grown-ups and concentrated instead on special-effect extravaganzas which, while being expensive to produce, would be guaranteed to make money in across the movie going demography.

    George Lucas Destroyed Modernity

  5. I was never meant to be good by argStyopa · · Score: 5, Interesting

    Back in the day, when Lucas was just a filmmaker, Star Wars was conceived literally as "a cowboy western in space".

    It was SUPPOSED to be action-packed and a little cheesy, with hammy 2d archetypes for characters...

    The way that this subsequently has ended up hallowed in some peoples' minds (including Lucas, who never has apparently missed a step on his own hagiography) does a disservice to what it was really intended to be.

    --
    -Styopa
    1. Re:I was never meant to be good by Z00L00K · · Score: 1

      I did watch the episode 4-6 last weekend, just to get a refreshment. What I think still is good with them is that they feel a lot more real than the prequels. Parts of actions interluded with some afterthought.

      --
      If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker would destroy civilization.
    2. Re:I was never meant to be good by Megane · · Score: 1

      And you know what? I actually prefer it that way. I like how rough around the edges the original movie is. (And FWIW, I still have never watched episode 1-3 and am not really interested in episode 7.) But then I'm an early Gen-Xer, not some damn millennial, running through people's lawns all the time, and needing a bunch of flashy special effects shit to keep my brain from shutting down.

      Did you know that it was initially in such low demand by theatres that theatres were required to show it if they wanted to show a specific other movie? Bet most of you have never heard of that other movie. Star Wars was a completely unexpected hit.

      --
      #naabhaprzrag, #sverubfr-000, #agi-fcbafberq, negvpyr[pynff*=' negvpyr-ary-'] { qvfcynl: abar !vzcbegnag; }
    3. Re:I was never meant to be good by Half-pint+HAL · · Score: 1

      Back in the day, when Lucas was just a filmmaker, Star Wars was conceived literally as "a cowboy western in space".

      It was SUPPOSED to be action-packed and a little cheesy, with hammy 2d archetypes for characters...

      The way that this subsequently has ended up hallowed in some peoples' minds (including Lucas, who never has apparently missed a step on his own hagiography) does a disservice to what it was really intended to be.

      Yes and no.

      The original drew heavily on Kurosawa's Hidden Fortress, and so bolstered up the lightweight 2d archetypes with "twilight of the samurai", creating a very strong effect: "oh, weren't things simpler in the old days, and we can go back to that". I don't really credit Lucas for constructing that -- I imagine a lot of it was more accident (and plagiarism) than design.

      However, the real enduring power of the trilogy came out of what Lawrence Kasdan did -- he managed to maintain the shallow good-and-evil fairy-story, combine it with Lucas's slightly pretentious ideas about Skywalker's internal conflict and build in a scale that more than made up for a lack of depth. It was a simple story that was well paced and well told, and there is really nothing wrong with that.

      --
      Got them moderator blues I blieve I walk out the do', With these mod-points I been gettin', I 'most never post no mo'
    4. Re:I was never meant to be good by JaredOfEuropa · · Score: 2

      They look a lot more real as well. The props and special effects sometimes look a bit cheesy and dated by today's standards, but they still hold up surprisingly well. And I prefer them over the way overdone CGI-gasm of the prequels, which often end up looking fake. Not special-effects fake, but "no one in their right mind would design / build / fly like that". The acting in the prequels was horrible as well; almost everything is being acted out in front of a green screen, and it shows. Some people commented on the Spanish dubbed versions being much better because you'd at least have voice acting from people who are trained to convey some emotion while sitting in a recording booth.

      Thankfully, it seems that the upcoming episode is closer to the originals in look & feel. Lucas not being in charge anymore is probably the best thing that could possibly happen to the franchise. Anyway, I'm planning to watch episodes 4-6 this weekend as well. The original versions. thankyouverymuch.

      --
      If construction was anything like programming, an incorrectly fitted lock would bring down the entire building...
    5. Re:I was never meant to be good by Dogtanian · · Score: 1

      Back in the day, when Lucas was just a filmmaker, Star Wars was conceived literally as "a cowboy western in space". It was SUPPOSED to be action-packed and a little cheesy

      As far as I'm aware, it was heavily influenced by the original Flash Gordon and similar serials from the 1930s- apparently Lucas originally started out trying to get the rights to remake Flash Gordon. You can even see signs of this in the stylised screen wipes, which a lot of people now associate with Star Wars and don't realise are an obvious homage to the use of those wipes in those old serials.

      (The final script also apparently owes a lot to the 1958 Japanese film, The Hidden Fortress).

      Regardless, whether or not its influences count as "cowboy western", it was undeniably influenced by- and to some extent meant as a modernised version of- those old pulp fiction serials, regardless of whether or not some people take it a little too seriously.

      Someone made the perceptive comment that whereas the original Star Wars trilogy was influenced by all those old films, the problem with the prequels was that they were influenced by Star Wars.

      Well, that and (a) the fact that George Lucas was by then so powerful that no-one was able to stand up to him in the way they did on the original films (i.e. no-one to say "you can type this shit, but you can't say it" or change the famous Leia/Solo "I know" exchange) and it seems clear that most people think Lucas's work strongly benefited from having to accept such external input and collaboration. And (b) The fact that the prequels- what I saw of them- seemed more po-faced and aware of their own (inflated) "seriousness", aside from the designated- and maligned- comic relief.

      Disclaimer: I was never a rabid fan of the originals anyway, and I always found C3PO (who I keep wanting to call CP3O) a bit annoying too. But I can see why people like them on the original level they were intended, and I can understand why some people might take them more seriously than that... I just don't necessarily agree that it's entirely justified. :-)

      --
      "Slashdot - News and Chat Sites Deviant". (Click "homepage" link above for details).
    6. Re:I was never meant to be good by pscottdv · · Score: 1

      The dialog itself was terrible. I don't know what any actor could have done with it.

      --

      this signature has been removed due to a DMCA takedown notice

    7. Re:I was never meant to be good by epine · · Score: 2

      Some people commented on the Spanish dubbed versions being much better because you'd at least have voice acting from people who are trained to convey some emotion while sitting in a recording booth.

      I'm filing this tidbit away.

      If I'm ever forced to watch the prequels again, I'm going for a Spanish dub with English subtitles. (Once Google perfects Glass II, we can all have our own private audio and caption feed, while still sharing the same buttery, communal popcorn.)

      Perhaps Glass Halo Elite Strikes Back will have an option to realtime rotoscope the Taliban Tribbles of Tropicana in the style of A Scanner Darkly. Plus, every time Jarjar sticks out his tongue, we also get a startling Gimli breaking-his-axe-on-the-ring effect.

      Man, it would take a lot. Probably also a trunk full of Fear and Loathing.

    8. Re:I was never meant to be good by ConceptJunkie · · Score: 2

      But it wasn't the CGI excess that killed the prequels (although it helped), it was the wooden acting, the horrible dialog, endless scenes of people sitting around talking (but not about stuff that was all that interesting), a political plot that not fleshed out enough to be interesting or really understandable, and the horribly uneven pacing. Short action sequences, long drawn out talky parts, 87 minutes of pod racing without 1 molecule of drama, "Spinning is good; I'll try that.", a love story that made "The Silence of the Lambs" look sweet and well-adjusted, a 115 minute light-saber duel over lava that was worse than watching someone else play a video game because again it wasn't in the same timezone as drama because there was nothing as stake, the end was pre-ordained.

      It's not that I object to the idea of the movie having some depth and political intrigue... I can point to Star Trek episodes that are nothing but political intrigue and people sitting around talking that I think are brilliant, but they also have a world that's fleshed out enough that these ideas can be explored in depth. You can't do that in a 4 paragraph crawl at the beginning, and expect people to care.

      It's Star Wars: it's space monks vs. evil cyborgs. With spaceships.

      Trying to make it about more than that in the format of a movie is a waste of time. The original trilogy didn't and was all the better for it.

      --
      You are in a maze of twisty little passages, all alike.
    9. Re:I was never meant to be good by Z00L00K · · Score: 1

      I think that Alec Guinness did a lot for the original Star Wars movie, the experience of how to act and behave in a theatrical manner to make the best of a scene. A good actor is a lot more important than special effects ever can be. This because a good actor knows when and how to address the viewers.

      --
      If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker would destroy civilization.
  6. Han shot first! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Never forget that.

    1. Re:Han shot first! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      Wrong. Han didn't shoot first, Han fired, and Greedo died. There was no second shot.

    2. Re:Han shot first! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Ugh, I hate that semantic BS. In a gun fight, if someone shoots first, there usually isn't a second shot.

    3. Re:Han shot first! by Shortguy881 · · Score: 1

      That means Han shot first... And last.... And all the shots in between...

      --
      Brilliance without wisdom, power without conscience. Ours is a world of nuclear giants and ethical infants.
  7. I did the samw thing.... by RogueyWon · · Score: 5, Insightful

    ... and I didn't think it had aged too badly. It's more or less what I remembered. A lean, fast-paced space opera, with a handful of iconic scenes and an uncanny ability to raise a smile. It's not a deep or profound movie, which is in some ways part of its charm.

    For me, the Star Wars I loved growing up was never really about the movies. It was about the 1990s games; in particular X-Wing and TIE Fighter, which unlike most other space combat games of the time weren't afraid to allow their starfighters to be complex, tricky beasts, and the Dark Forces/Jedi Knight games. It was also about the early novels; the Timothy Zahn ones in particular, before the later degeneration into unreadability. Those games and books showed a very different Star Wars to the one you saw in the films; darker, more complex and more focussed on detailed world-building, compared to the light-touch magical space-opera of the films.

    That Star Wars is gone now; it took a body blow when the prequels ignored it and since Disney took over the franchise it's been officially retired. But that's fine, I can live with that. I'll go and see the new movie and I hope I'll like it. I'm fairly confident it won't be a mess on a par with the prequels. But it won't be the Star Wars I grew up with.

    1. Re:I did the samw thing.... by SomeoneFromBelgium · · Score: 1

      I watched the Original star wars in the cinema because my aunt (!) obviously thought that it was something you just couldn't pass by.
      I myself never though about it that way. I thought it was just me liking Sci-Fi (nobody in my family really does (that aunt doesn't really count)).

      It's only by looking at the prequels that I figured out how well made the movies were. Not just the special effects, nor the epic figures like Yoda and Darth Vader.
      It's just the finnish on it: the music (which is still legendary), the acting (luke, obi one, C3PO, even Chewbaccu) and lastly the editing. How every scene is reduced to it's bare minimum. Opening scene: no explanation. You just know the fleeing ship is from the rebels. The encounter with Obi-one: "you will have to if you want to come with me to Aldebaran". Etc. Etc.

      And that is (to me) timeless...

    2. Re:I did the samw thing.... by Half-pint+HAL · · Score: 2

      Timothy Zahn is a cheap hack who writes dimestore pulp. His Star Wars novels wavered between slavish consistency with the films (meaning no character development) and utter disregard for the films (creatures that exist outwith the energy that binds the entire universe together...?) leaving a sense of sheer mediocrity.

      --
      Got them moderator blues I blieve I walk out the do', With these mod-points I been gettin', I 'most never post no mo'
    3. Re:I did the samw thing.... by Cro+Magnon · · Score: 2

      I loved Zahn's Thrawn trilogy. I don't really remember any of the other Start Wars books I bought, and I gave up on them fairly quickly, but those were good.

      --
      Slow down, cowboy! It has been 4 hours since you last posted. You must wait another few hours.
    4. Re:I did the samw thing.... by wolverine1999 · · Score: 1

      Don't forget the Marvel comics adaptation too..

    5. Re:I did the samw thing.... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      no

      they are really really bad

      it's just all the other EU books were even worse

    6. Re:I did the samw thing.... by cwsumner · · Score: 1

      Timothy Zahn is a well respected Science Fiction writer, who wrote many novels before the Thraun trilogy.
      And I enjoyed them, too.

  8. Lame by Dan+East · · Score: 5, Interesting

    This is just lame. For starters, anyone who saw Star Wars once in 1977, and never watched it again until now, is clearly not a big fan of the sci-fi genre in the first place. Even if you managed to avoid it on VHS, DVD, etc, the original trilogy was re-released to theaters multiple times, the last being in 1997. I saw it again on the big screen then, and it held up as well as ever.

    As for his specific points, and how things didn't exactly align to what he remembered from four decades ago, Luke was whiny at first - it is a coming of age story. C3PO has always been a "nervous wreck". He's was a vaudeville type comedy relief. Obi-Wan simply put Luke on the right path and their time together was very short. The movie isn't about Obi-Wan. Costumes were fine, and as for the aliens, I'd rather have practical effects that are slightly flawed than 100% perfect CGI aliens (is that really what he wants??). And finally, it is a very fast paced action movie with only a couple breathers in the whole thing. Yet it manages to create such a vast world with so many nuances in short time - you couldn't take it all in in a single viewing (Ah, maybe that's his problem right there! LOL)

    That article was just silly.

    --
    Better known as 318230.
    1. Re:Lame by petes_PoV · · Score: 1

      anyone who saw Star Wars once in 1977, and never watched it again until now, is clearly not a big fan of the sci-fi genre

      I disagree. I saw the first one at the Leicester Square Odeon when it first came out and right from the opening sequence it was a game-changer. It needed a big, huge, screen and rumbling sound system. Without that, it's a weak imitation of the film I saw.

      I saw the next one at the cinema, too. Not as good and the one's after that I didn't bother with.

      However, I definitely am a fan - not someone obsessed with the notions portrayed in the film - but a fan of the idea, the presentation and the size of the venture. I do hope that the new episode matches up to my memories. I just don't hold out much hope for it.

      --
      politicians are like babies' nappies: they should both be changed regularly and for the same reasons
    2. Re:Lame by allcoolnameswheretak · · Score: 2

      Word.

      After over 10 years or so I just watched the original trilogy in preparation for the new Star Wars, and found the movies just as awesome as ever, or even more so. The only reason I didn't watch them for so long was that I refused to watch the special editions, and for a long time there was no alternative. Now, thanks to the despecialized editions - there is finally a definitive way to watch the originals again.

      The movies - are - fucking - awesome - period.

      One of the reasons they are still so great now is precisely beause of the lame, cookie-cutter, Hollywood standardized movies of the modern era, over reliant on special effects with predictable plots, sub-par dialoge, forced humor, etc. Watching Star Wars again ist actually a refreshing experience.

      I was also surprised at how good Mark Hamill's acting is, considering he is probably the biggest newbie on the set, he actually shows the strongest performance in my opinion. After R2D2 of course.

      Michael Franco needs to get a fucking clue.

    3. Re:Lame by allcoolnameswheretak · · Score: 0

      Thank you.

      I've gotten into this big argument a couple of times with my girlfriend, who is a big Lord of the Rings fan and likes "Fantasy" but not "Sci-Fi", trying to explain that Star Wars is way more prominent on the Fantasy scale than on the Sci-Fi scale.
      It's not Sci-Fi just because it has spaceships in it.

    4. Re:Lame by gsslay · · Score: 1

      For starters, anyone who saw Star Wars once in 1977, and never watched it again until now, is clearly not a big fan of the sci-fi genre in the first place.

      Star Wars is hardly genre-defining. It's space-opera. You could be the biggest sci-fi fan in the world and have only see Star Wars once. It really doesn't have the depth that requires multiple viewings.

    5. Re:Lame by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      So what's your position, then, to tell people what sci fi is?

      Is BG not scifi because the cylons are too close to golems, it must be fantasy?

      And what's the definition of fantasy? Make believe worlds. But that's what (almost) all sci fi has to do. Otherwise it would be a documentary or period drama.

    6. Re:Lame by William+Baric · · Score: 1

      Awesome? Really?

      I loved those movie when I was a kid (except for RotJ, because the Ewoks were already far too childish for a 14 years old boy). I really did.

      I watch them again before the release of the new trilogy, this time as an adult, and found the original trilogy to be nothing but movies for kids. Apart from the pleasure of reliving childhood memories, I was seriously disappointed.

    7. Re:Lame by allcoolnameswheretak · · Score: 1

      You think the charred bodies of Luke's stepparents, chopping off arms and hands, extorting information using drugs and torture, choking people to death and slamming them against a wall, mass genocide, killing people as punishment, huge, nightmarish man-eating monsters and sand worms, eating live pigs, electrocuting someone to death, the emperors evil grin and killing teddy bears is something for kids?

      Really?

    8. Re:Lame by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Yes, really. You might want to acquaint yourself with these things called "fairy tales". Your modern oversensitivity is pathetic.

      Red Riding Hood: People getting eaten by woves. Sleeping Beauty: Witches poisoning apples. Etc... etc... etc...

    9. Re:Lame by pscottdv · · Score: 1

      I disagree. I saw the first one at the Leicester Square Odeon when it first came out and right from the opening sequence it was a game-changer. It needed a big, huge, screen and rumbling sound system.

      So much this. I have tried to explain to my daughters the feeling of that opening sequence with the camera panning the star field until the planet comes into view followed by massive spacecraft rumbling into view right over your head! Truly awe-inspiring to 11 year-old me.

      --

      this signature has been removed due to a DMCA takedown notice

    10. Re:Lame by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0
      > something for kids?

      Kids were programmed much differently 40 years ago and trained/not trained to pick up on certain things.

    11. Re:Lame by avandesande · · Score: 1

      It's pretty simple actually- in fantasy the characters deal with typical human story arcs in whatever setting that it is. In sci-fi, people are are facing some dilemma that is new to the human race.

      --
      love is just extroverted narcissism
    12. Re:Lame by b0bby · · Score: 1

      the original trilogy was re-released to theaters multiple times, the last being in 1997. I saw it again on the big screen then, and it held up as well as ever.

      Ok, I saw the original in the theater at least 5 times as a kid, read the comics, etc. Saw the trilogy on VHS maybe a couple of times. So not a major fan, but interested enough. Then I didn't watch them again until the re-release in 1997. I have to say, even aside from the lame extra CGI, it wasn't what I remembered. It's still fun and all, but as a kid it was the best thing ever and as an adult, just ok.

    13. Re:Lame by Viewsonic · · Score: 1

      Wrong. Science Fiction often describes futuristic technologies compared to our own. This is exactly what Star Wars does. Even though it happened a "long.. long.. time ago" it is still using technologies far beyond our own and makes it science fiction.

      Hopefully I just saved you from getting tossed out of the next party you attend.

    14. Re:Lame by allcoolnameswheretak · · Score: 0

      The fairy tales you mention have their roots in medieval pedagogic methods, which meant to scare kids into behaving.

      You call my "modern" oversensitivity "pathetic" and as a counterexample decide to pick archaic fairy tales from ages long past? Way to go, grandpa.

    15. Re:Lame by Ken+D · · Score: 1

      How else are you supposed to prepare them for the real world?
      Let them see all this stuff on the 6 o'clock news?

    16. Re:Lame by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Science Fiction often describes futuristic technologies compared to our own.

      I'm puzzled - are magical mind bullets really "futuristic"? Because I've got a great-grandma who used to swear she could give somebody the evil eye and curse them, too.

      "Futuristic technology" =/= "The Force", no matter how much bullshit 'midichlorian' back story you're trying to give them. Star wars really just goes to show that the line between fantasy and science fiction is blurred to the point of irrelevance when you start picking completely unscientific tropes to embed in your "science" fiction.

      Yes, lasers and space ships exist in real life. No, telekinesis, esp, and other magic bullshit doesn't.

    17. Re:Lame by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Yeah, because it's America, where mammary glands banned and you can see hundreds of murders by watching daytime TV.

      It's stuff for 10 year olds..

    18. Re:Lame by Viewsonic · · Score: 1

      Sorry, it's not all or nothing that defines something as scifi.

    19. Re:Lame by Oligonicella · · Score: 1

      The Force is not a futuristic technology, it's magic. Hence, it's fantasy. It's also the fundamental concept of the series. Hence, *they're* fantasy - with some advance science tech thrown in.

    20. Re:Lame by Oligonicella · · Score: 1

      The Stainless Steel Rat deals with murder mysteries in an advanced society. Still SciFi.

    21. Re:Lame by avandesande · · Score: 1

      If you say so...

      --
      love is just extroverted narcissism
    22. Re:Lame by blind+biker · · Score: 1

      If we are honest, it's worth noting also that Star Wars has nothing much to do with Sci-Fi.

      --
      "The agriculture ministry is not in charge of Gundam" - Japanese ministry official.
    23. Re:Lame by ConceptJunkie · · Score: 1

      I disagree, and would offer the grandparent poster a drink at my party.

      Science fiction is more than a setting. It must contain elements that are extrapolated from the reality we know using scientific principles or ideas based on scientific principles (i.e., "speculative fiction"). "Star Wars" wouldn't fundamentally change if it were set in feudal Japan and called "The Hidden Fortress" and the characters were riding horses and using swords, because the most important elements of the story aren't its specific setting nor anything based on science.

      In "Star Wars", the "what" and "how" and "why" of the technology, settings or phenomena aren't important, and generally don't matter at all. This is why "midichlorians" was such a stupid addition: the Force doesn't need to be explained; it's fine the way originally presented. It's magic, and works best in the story if it remains magic.

      "Star Wars" is a fantasy in a science fiction setting. Similarly, most modern "SF" films are really just horror films or action films in a science fiction setting. There's nothing wrong with that if they're good movies, and many of them are, but it helps to classify them correctly.

      --
      You are in a maze of twisty little passages, all alike.
    24. Re:Lame by ConceptJunkie · · Score: 1

      I'm with you. You have to retain your sense of wonder, which the movies captured perfectly. You can't dismiss them because they were written and designed for kids, and a lot of us first saw them as kids, and with the perspective of kids. You can't approach them with a jaded view based on how Hollywood has evolved in the nearly 40 years since. You can't criticize them for not being good "science fiction" because they aren't, and aren't trying to be. They also aren't "Shakespeare"... but are less removed from the kinds of works the Bard wrote than many snobby elites would acknowledge. They are myths, stories as old and universal as humankind itself. The setting, the technology and spaceships and blasters and light sabers and robots, is not central to what they are, just a medium in which the stories are told in a very visually appealing way.

      If approached with the right mindset, and taking them for what they are, Saturday morning serials writ large, they accomplish their goals with great artistry and technical skill. And for similar reasons, this is why the prequels largely failed.

      --
      You are in a maze of twisty little passages, all alike.
    25. Re:Lame by vux984 · · Score: 4, Insightful

      Frankly, I think you just saw Return of the Jedi at precisely the wrong age. Your comment reads like the xbox fanbois who won't play Super Mario Bros or Zelda because its a 'kids game' and they want everyone to know that they only like mature things and therefore are mature.

      I saw RotJ when I was 10. And I loved it.

      Today I watch it and I get that the ewoks are a bit too cute. But all the scenes they are in are still fine. From them finding Leia, to C3P0 pretending to be a deity, to their attack on the shield generator. I just don't see anything wrong with them; such that they 'ruin' the movie.

      They only ruin the movie for someone who wanted... no... needed RotJ to be a "mature" movie so he could enjoy it without people questioning his adulthood. The ewoks aren't "dark" they aren't "serious"... and their presence softens the tone of the movie (especially as Luke was much darker and more serious in this movie and the ewok scenes are spliced with the MUCH darker throne room scenes). But too me RotJ really is quintessentially "Star Wars".

      I watch them again before the release of the new trilogy, this time as an adult, and found the original trilogy to be nothing but movies for kids

      Right. That's all it ever was.

      Apart from the pleasure of reliving childhood memories, I was seriously disappointed.

      That's more on you then on the movies. The movies haven't changed. I re-watched them WITH my kids; and they were just as enjoyable as they were the first time(s).

      Perhaps I'm wrong about you. Or perhaps I'm right and you won't admit it. ;) But whether or not I am right about you specifically, I think a lot of Ewok hate in general is from people who were becoming adults themselves, who wanted Jedi to be a 'mature serious war movie' and not a 'family fun' movie.

      As for the prequels, they are just bad movies that spend far too much time throwing shit in your face then telling a story. And then when they get around to the story telling its just painfully bad.

    26. Re:Lame by ConceptJunkie · · Score: 2

      Did you know "Planet of the Apes" was rated "G"?

      All I can say it, you shouldn't go back and read fairy tales from before the last century. You might gasp yourself to death.

      Believe it or not, there was a time when children's fare didn't automatically mean something so sterile and artificial that no self-aware person could take it seriously.

      Perhaps this is why the news is full of college students, legal adults by the way, who are whining and pitching a fit because they've been made to feel uncomfortable by mere words and are demanding someone (else) make it stop.

      Perhaps this is why we've created a generation of kids who are so used to having everything spoon fed to them and to being led around and handed everything that adolescence routinely extends in the late 20s and beyond, and for many, never truly ends.

      Perhaps this is why a majority of the country is trying create and expand a Nanny State to allow them, or anyone else, to be reduced in responsibility and duty, to the level of infants regardless of what they are truly capable of.

      Perhaps this is why we are heading for a society in which it's been made impossible to fail, and therefore impossible to also truly succeed.

      --
      You are in a maze of twisty little passages, all alike.
    27. Re:Lame by TangoMargarine · · Score: 1

      If you took out The Force it would be sci fi, definitely. But The Force = magic, and if there's magic it's at least partly fantasy.

      --
      Unity? Screw that: XFCE. Slashdot Beta? Screw that: SoylentNews. Australis? Screw that: Pale Moon. UX developers DIAF
    28. Re:Lame by Prune · · Score: 1

      anyone who saw Star Wars once in 1977, and never watched it again until now, is clearly not a big fan of the sci-fi genre in the first place

      That's just silly. Most readers of serious sci-fi I know would classify Star Wars as fantasy, not sci-fi. There's zero hard sci-fi in Star Wars, and the core element -- the force -- is magic.

      --
      "Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason."
    29. Re:Lame by DNS-and-BIND · · Score: 1

      How do *any* of the technologies in Star Wars work, exactly? Where's the science? If there's no science then it's not science fiction.

      The one explanation we got, midichlorians, was worse than not having any explanations. George Lucas went in for a blood test once and they did a white blood cell count and he was greatly impressed by this medical miracle. More white blood cells = higher infection = genius idea! Go go George!

      --
      Shutting down free speech with violence isn't fighting fascism. It IS fascism!
    30. Re:Lame by painandgreed · · Score: 1

      The ewoks aren't "dark" they aren't "serious"... and their presence softens the tone of the movie (especially as Luke was much darker and more serious in this movie and the ewok scenes are spliced with the MUCH darker throne room scenes).

      Except when you remember that the main characters were worried because the ewoks were about to cook and eat them. Only Luke levitating C3PO saved them. I'm sure that many a ewok dined on stormtrooper flesh after the victory on Endor.

    31. Re:Lame by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Sorry, it's not all or nothing that defines something as scifi

      Oh my god, you're right! This is why I said:

      Star wars really just goes to show that the line between fantasy and science fiction is blurred to the point of irrelevance when you start picking completely unscientific tropes to embed in your "science" fiction.

      So the upshot of this is that it's just as valid to call Star Wars - with its magical mind bullets, mystlcal ways of knowing, and Jedi and Sith "Space Wizards" - just as much fantasy as it is science fiction. Star Wars has spaceships and lasers, which I suppose could be called "science fiction" because those are sciencey things, but there's a broad, massive streak of fantasy in there with all of the magical, mystical mumbo-jumbo thrown on top.

    32. Re:Lame by Evl · · Score: 1

      I think you have a point there.

      Although (to burn some karma), having just watched all of the movies with my kids, I don't think Revenge of the Sith was all that loathsome. Jar Jar finally recedes into the background, and Anakin's transformation into Darth Vader essentially for fear of asking forgiveness doesn't make for a bad parable, at least by Hollywood standards.

      Anyway, it's interesting to see at what ages kids like the different episodes. My son really loved the original with Luke the best until he saw Anakin at roughly the same age. My daughter liked Return of the Jedi best, so yes the cute Ewoks worked fine at making a family movie.

    33. Re:Lame by userw014 · · Score: 1

      Star Wars isn't science fiction. It's not even science fantasy or science fantasy wish fulfillment adventure story. It's a magical fantasy wish fulfillment adventure story.
      Pay attention to Episode IV: A New Hope - Obi-Wan Kenobi is a wizard.

    34. Re:Lame by ChrisMaple · · Score: 1

      As far as I can tell, Mark Hamill played himself:a not particularly bright young adult with a special ability, thrust into enormous events.

      --
      Contribute to civilization: ari.aynrand.org/donate
    35. Re:Lame by Cederic · · Score: 1

      Oh please. Return of the Jedi was better than Spy Kids but I can watch either without my manhood feeling threatened. Neither of them are in the same league as Jaws, which is another kids film, or even something like The Outlaw Josey Wales which has an awful lot in similar with something like Star Wars.

      Hell, The Princess Diaries is watchable but flawed. Metropolis (i.e. Metoroporisu, the Japanese animated film) is quite awesome. The Spongebob Squarepants movies are terrible.

      The ewoks are also terrible. The film would be better if it didn't try and portray them as cute adorable dangerous little creatures that gambol and play and use primitive weapons. Fuck that, it's just lazy bad writing and shit direction. Take it from someone that fucking enjoyed The Maze Runner even though it's apparently some sort of tween movie aimed at a younger audience. Good films are good films and don't include ewoks.

    36. Re:Lame by vux984 · · Score: 1

      I don't think Revenge of the Sith was all that loathsome.

      I do. JarJar was symptom of the bad prequels... and perhaps a mascot for 'the awful', but he was far from the worst nonsense in the movies.

      Anakin joining the Sith ... they had 3 whole movies to show us how Anakin was seduced to the darkside... and I was entirely unconvinced.
      Anakin promptly executing a bunch of children, many who looked up to him... was ridiculous. "Full retard".
      Mace Windu confronting the emperor by himself... ridiculous.
      Then Yoda doing the same thing... ridiculous. Then going into exile instead of I dunno... regrouping and trying again maybe with 2 Jedi...??! Two Jedi went up against Darth Maul, who was basically a sith nobody... but the Sith lord under their nose, who'd fooled them all for years... that's a solo play?

      Most of the Jedi, including top leaders being trivially executed by Storm Troopers? WTF? In the first one, remember how concerned they were at the beginning when QuiGon and ObiWon show up to 'negotiate'? ... what were they worried about?? Apparently you can just shoot them in the back with storm troopers 99% of the time, no fuss at all. Throwaway clones can take care of them with minimal losses.

      Then the final fight between Obiwan and Anakin was needlessly long, some of the dialog was painful, and Obiwan not finishing Anakin off was just weak. (What? Leaving him defeated, burnt, and limbless? How Jedi is that?... pity and mercy for his former friend and apprentice would have had him finish him off; even if nothing else.)

      And the very end... Padme dies. What loyalty does Anakin have for the emperor now? Sure he can't exactly go back to the Jedi after murdering a bunch of children ... but the one thing Palpatine offered him to bring him over isn't even worth anything now. So what? Vader serves the emperor why? Because, hey, its a job, and he burned bridges with his previous employers? What's a Sith lord going to do as an independent... it was just silly. You could see what Lucas was trying to do... that Anakin was seduced by power... that his desire for power came from a desire to do good, and then encompasses him so that the power becomes its own reward. But the story Lucas told just didn't convey that at all.

      Yet he would kill a bunch of jedi children because he wanted to save Padme's life and besides Yoda had snubbed him by not making him a master Jedi yet... unbelievable nonsense.

      Sure the original star wars movies had plot holes you could drive a truck through; but they still hold up far better than the absolute mess that is the prequel trilogy.

    37. Re:Lame by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      To say Star Wars is sci fi is stretching it. It is fantasy. Just because the story, which is very basic and formulatic, takes place in space does not make it sci fi.

      I would argue that Star Wars has done more to damage to the sci fi cinematic genre than any other movie. He was the original "Michael Bay".

    38. Re:Lame by david_thornley · · Score: 1

      No, it's psychic powers, hence science fiction. In the prequels, it's even caused by midichlorians (ick), and hence scientifically based. Looking at something and calling it "magic" doesn't tell you anything about whether it's fantasy or science fiction. If it's labeled in the movie or book as magic or psychic powers, that's significant, but I don't remember it ever being explained as either in the good three movies.

      --
      "When you have eliminated the unacceptable, whatever is left, however improbable, must be the truthiness" - Holmes
    39. Re:Lame by david_thornley · · Score: 1

      You're going to have to go through the science fiction section and toss a lot of books into the fantasy pile.

      Lots of science fiction doesn't have anything science fictiony integral to the plot. Lots of science fiction is based on things that, by our current understanding of physics, are impossible. I find the Force a lot more plausible than easy FTL travel.

      --
      "When you have eliminated the unacceptable, whatever is left, however improbable, must be the truthiness" - Holmes
    40. Re:Lame by Rakarra · · Score: 1

      Anakin joining the Sith ... they had 3 whole movies to show us how Anakin was seduced to the darkside... and I was entirely unconvinced.

      I thought that was fine, I was convinced. What I was NOT convinced was the reactions of everyone around him. In Clones, Anakin tells Padme that he massacred an entire village of sand people... everyone. Every last one. She doesn't seem particularly shocked, and never tells anyone else. Genocide wouldn't be a red flag for someone like Amidala?

      Mace Windu confronting the emperor by himself... ridiculous.

      Oh, he had two other Jedi with him, they just died ridiculously quickly in a lightsaber fight that was poorly choreographed. But the emperor was supposed to be the Sith Lord they'd been looking for 10 years. Why not bring... 10 jedi? 20? And Master Yoda? Had they really all been extinguished?

      Most of the Jedi, including top leaders being trivially executed by Storm Troopers? WTF? In the first one, remember how concerned they were at the beginning when QuiGon and ObiWon show up to 'negotiate'? ... what were they worried about?? Apparently you can just shoot them in the back with storm troopers 99% of the time, no fuss at all.

      I think it would be a pretty good way to assassinate Jedi. Storm troopers would have no chance in a straight up fight, but anyone, Jedi included, could be killed by a surprise blaster shot (why the idiots in Episode 1 didn't just put Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan in a room with a bunch of pipe bombs under the table is beyond me). But don't they have a connection to the force? Wouldn't they have some sort of.. I don't know, spiritual warning? Oh, I know, I'll bet the Dark Side clouded that ability, as it often does for Yoda at crucial times.

  9. No imagination, kids these days, get off my lawn.. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    I get little excitement from gaudy effects, and while it's absolutely possible to produce a good film with good CGI, I've never watched something from the past and thought, "Oh wow! The poor effects are spoiling this!" Use your imagination, cunts. Or let the scenario speak for itself. A modern high res computer-generated action scenario is probably no more realistic, anyway - space is actually big and mostly empty, war rooms and costumes aren't polished to within an inch of their life, every second of existence doesn't come with a backing track, and humans need to concentrate to do hard shit rather than be confronted with a billion distractions. In fact, just read the half a dozen articles like this one about how modern special effects don't really work out well for a decent narrative, i.e. not unless all you're looking for is special effects.

  10. Loser Luke? by Nidi62 · · Score: 1

    The author complains about Luke being whiny, but what does he expect? The whole back story with Luke was that he is miserable and stuck on a farm in the middle of nowhere. Then of course there's the fact that he keeps asking Owen when he can go to the Imperial Academy. What lonely, bored high school/early college aged kid wouldn't be whiny?

    --
    The only thing necessary for evil to triumph is for it to be pitted against a slightly greater evil
    1. Re:Loser Luke? by Megane · · Score: 1

      Yeah, and then he finds that guy from American Graffiti who drives him all over the place. He probably rolled his spaceship, too.

      --
      #naabhaprzrag, #sverubfr-000, #agi-fcbafberq, negvpyr[pynff*=' negvpyr-ary-'] { qvfcynl: abar !vzcbegnag; }
  11. kinda/sorta like listening to a joke by turkeydance · · Score: 3, Interesting

    hilarious the first time.

  12. Online reporter grows to be a cynical, .. by orasio · · Score: 1

    .. unimaginative douchebag.

    News at 11

  13. Watch Spaceballs, instead by AntronArgaiv · · Score: 1

    "We Brake for Nobody"

    OK, so the humor level is about 6th Grade, but it's still more fun than watching the first Star Wars again.

    1. Re:Watch Spaceballs, instead by varag · · Score: 1

      It's all about the merchandising...

    2. Re:Watch Spaceballs, instead by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      OK, so the humor level is about 6th Grade, but it's still more fun than watching the first Star Wars again.

      Well if we're going back to middle school, why not pull out Puella Magi Madoka Magica? Probably the best five hours of entertainment of the 21st century. But don't take it from me, take it from snarky and cynical sci-fi critic Charles Sonnenburg (sfdebris.com) who said that he was "sorry to gush" but even though he was "snarling at the checkout - do you want to share this purchase with your friends on Facebook? Fuck you!!" and "this series had a lot to prove", he ultimately decided "if I could convince you to sample any one series that I've reviewed, this would be it." - ranking it above all incarnations of Star Trek, Stargate, Farscape, Babylon V, Battlestar Galactica, Doctor Who, Firefly, the Twilight Zone, and more.

      (Hilariously, even the fact that this series is as awesome as it is, is kind of a major spoiler...)

    3. Re:Watch Spaceballs, instead by Megane · · Score: 1

      Spaceballs: the Flame Thrower! (The kids love this one.)

      May the Schwartz be with you!

      --
      #naabhaprzrag, #sverubfr-000, #agi-fcbafberq, negvpyr[pynff*=' negvpyr-ary-'] { qvfcynl: abar !vzcbegnag; }
    4. Re:Watch Spaceballs, instead by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I see that your Schwartz is as large as mine

    5. Re:Watch Spaceballs, instead by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I see that your Schwartz is as large as mine

      Almost a correct quote, but not quite.

    6. Re:Watch Spaceballs, instead by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Spaceballs: The Flamethrower...

      I'm still waiting, Mr. Brooks.

    7. Re:Watch Spaceballs, instead by CaptnCrud · · Score: 1

      See he got the up side, I got the downside....there's two sides to every schwartz.

  14. I've never understood the adult fascination with by mark_reh · · Score: 2, Informative

    the whole Star Wars universe. The original was clearly a kid's movie, as were all the follow on stories. It's like Santa Claus or the Easter Bunny- there's something wrong with you if you haven't grown out of it by the time you're 8 YO. I mean really, one of the movies had teddy bears ferchrissakes!

    I do a lot of 3D printing and I swear if I see one more Yoda head or storm trooper head or light saber being printed by an adult I'm going to scream! If you look at sites like Thingiverse or Youmagine, 70% of it is iPhone cases, 29.9% is star wars figures, and the rest is good/useful/interesting stuff with some artistic or functional merit. I wish they'd spin off separate sites for that stuff so I could avoid searching through all that dreck...

  15. Times change and we change with them by petes_PoV · · Score: 1

    many other adults introduced to the sci-fi franchise as kids

    Maybe you just grew up?

    --
    politicians are like babies' nappies: they should both be changed regularly and for the same reasons
    1. Re:Times change and we change with them by Jack+Griffin · · Score: 1

      many other adults introduced to the sci-fi franchise as kids

      Maybe you just grew up?

      We all did, so why couldn't Lucas recognise that fact? It is possible to cater for both young and mature audiences, as the original Star Wars and Empire Strikes Back did so quite effectively.

  16. Re:#gamergate by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

    That's offensive. In the future please use LBGTQNAA.

  17. If You Think It's Bad. Look at the Prequels! by segedunum · · Score: 1

    Honestly, if you think Star Wars IV hasn't aged well, watch the prequels. They are excruciatingly bad.

    1. Re:If You Think It's Bad. Look at the Prequels! by oh_my_080980980 · · Score: 1

      Thank You!

    2. Re:If You Think It's Bad. Look at the Prequels! by Cro+Magnon · · Score: 1

      The difference is, the originals were good but aged badly. The prequels started off bad.

      --
      Slow down, cowboy! It has been 4 hours since you last posted. You must wait another few hours.
    3. Re:If You Think It's Bad. Look at the Prequels! by Jack+Griffin · · Score: 1

      I actually think the originals have aged quite well. With real models and actual sets, it still looks like a real (albeit kooky) universe. The problem with CGi is new technology makes even the best effects look shit within just a couple of years.

  18. Sounds like someone was too young by thegarbz · · Score: 1

    If you think a classic story has aged then it sounds like you were too young or immature to realise what was going on in the first place.

    The story hasn't changed, only your perception of expectation of it has changed which makes me believe that you don't like it as much any more because you simply don't remember what it was like in the first place. Rose coloured glasses for your hindsight.

    I just watched it recently. It was exactly like I remember it, cheesy and entertaining. If your suggestion is to not watch the original because it may ruin it for you, then maybe you don't like Starwars.

    1. Re:Sounds like someone was too young by The-Ixian · · Score: 1

      The thing is, the story is just pure sappy, over-the-top drama.

      I would watch the original movie over and over as a kid but I was always just waiting for the last run on the DS sequence... the rest of the movie was just a bunch of talking.

      The only thing that made SW enthralling was the space ships and it did that VERY WELL... better than anything had before that time. To me, the space ships have been the one consistency between all of the SW movies; They are all pretty neat.

      You are right though, over time my perceptions and expectations have changed and I can appreciate drama more than I did as a kid... but through this lens SW is just like any other soap opera.

      --
      My eyes reflect the stars and a smile lights up my face.
  19. Just goes to show by codeButcher · · Score: 1

    The past isn't what it used to be....

    --
    Free, as in your money being freed from the confines of your account.
  20. He doesn't say which version he watched. by waspleg · · Score: 1

    Fuck Lucas, if you're not watching the original theatrical version (yes you can find a torrent of the before-George-Lucas-raped-your-childhood version which is quite good) you aren't seeing the real thing.

    It doesn't sound like he was fan to begin with since he talks about seeing it last at 9 years old? But, then he says he saw Jedi as a senior in high school? Okay, so New Hope comes out in 1977 and he's 9 years old.

    By the time "Return of the Jedi" came out, I was a senior in high school.

    Jedi came out in 1983. That's 5 years. So he was a senior in high school at 14? Not impossible but pretty unlikely.

    Yea, I'm a fan of the original trilogy and it was sad to see George Lucas turn in to his own characters (young Lucas = Anakin, old Lucas = Vader). I still have PTSD from the first prequel which came out when *I* was a senior in high school, so I won't be in line at the theater for the new movie any time soon, but, it's also okay to make fun something when done well (there are 3 Rifftrax of the original movies) but this is supposed to be "commentary", filed under "tech culture"? Really? This is a poorly written editorial and some how ended up on /.

    1. Re:He doesn't say which version he watched. by Half-pint+HAL · · Score: 1

      Yea, I'm a fan of the original trilogy and it was sad to see George Lucas turn in to his own characters (young Lucas = Anakin, old Lucas = Vader).

      Anakin was a whiny wee brat who grew into a petulant unpleasant youth with serious attachment issues who hated anyone who didn't massage his ego. Vader was a galactic-scale badass with an iron strength of will who had the wherewithal to question his own mistakes and set his own course in life.

      --
      Got them moderator blues I blieve I walk out the do', With these mod-points I been gettin', I 'most never post no mo'
    2. Re:He doesn't say which version he watched. by waspleg · · Score: 1

      Well... Yea, Jake whatever was annoying, he was a kid, all kids are annoying. However he was somewhat idealistic and "brave" in the we-know-no-harm-can-come-to-him-anyway sort of way. Tried to free his mom from being a slave etc.

      I mean more like idealistic visionary/dreamer vs soulless corporate scumwhore. If you watch the RedLetterMedia dissection of the prequels there is a video clip they found and used where Lucas is talking about special effects being pointless on their own and only useful in advancing a story (which they quickly point out the irony of).

  21. This Franco dude is an entitled ass! by EzInKy · · Score: 3, Insightful

    I was nearly 20 when "Star Wars" first hit the screen and, except for "2001", it was the best science fiction movie to date. Compare it to "War of the Worlds", "The Phantom Planet", Panic In The Year Zero", "Robinson Crusoe On Mars", "Crack In The World", "Farenheit 451", "Planet Of The Apes", etc and you will find nothing comes even close to the epic sweep of adventure that the original "Star Wars" brings to the screen. Hell, I do a rewatch every year and it is still my favorite episode in the series.

    --
    Time is what keeps everything from happening all at once.
    1. Re:This Franco dude is an entitled ass! by Rei · · Score: 5, Interesting

      Star Wars kind of suffers from the same problem that Tolkien suffers from when one goes back and reads LotR (well, apart from his long-winded writing style): it all feels so cliche now, done to death a million times over. But that's not Tolkein's fault because, while he hardly invented the tropes in LotR, he's the one that really popularized them and inspired a million other works to pick up those tropes and run with them.

      Star Wars certainly had its cheesy elements (a *lot* of them, and they don't start at the ewoks), but it did innovate too. My favorite example is the use of "crappy spaceships". It'd always generally been a sci-fi rule that, unless a ship has been recently damaged in combat, it's a shiny awesome wonder of technology. But the first space ship (after the initial chase scene) we're introduced to in Star Wars is a run-down piece of junk that's always breaking at the most inopportune times. Most of the rebel ships look like they're practically being held together by duct tape and poorly improvised spot welds.

      --
      Nothing says 'welcome to the neighborhood' like a gunny sack full of dead squirrels.
    2. Re:This Franco dude is an entitled ass! by fizzup · · Score: 1

      This is a good point. You will never find a more cliché-ridden text than a Shakespeare play. The only thing is - he wrote the clichés.

    3. Re:This Franco dude is an entitled ass! by Prune · · Score: 1

      Compare it to ...

      How about comparing it to actually well-reviewed sci-fi movies of the past, such as Forbidden Planet or (the original 1950s) The Day the Earth Stood Still? And, unlike these movies and 2001, Star Wars is not really sci-fi, but fantasy -- if the force isn't magic, I don't know what is.

      --
      "Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason."
    4. Re:This Franco dude is an entitled ass! by Jack+Griffin · · Score: 1

      But the first space ship (after the initial chase scene) we're introduced to in Star Wars is a run-down piece of junk that's always breaking at the most inopportune times.

      That was the great thing about the Star Wars universe, it was dirty. You very rarely see that any more, and it gave the movie a darker tone, rather than the shiny glow in the dark CGI of the prequels (look waterfalls!). The dirtiness of Tatooine, Mos Eisley, the Millenium Falcon, it was pure Western grit, the sense of a wild frontier and hopelessness against the odds. The prequels had none of that, it seemed like a simple demonstration of CGI and quirky merchandising opportunities cobbled together to cash in on a brand.

  22. Heathen! by poolmeister · · Score: 1

    Some people have no taste. Yes 3PO's whiny, the costumes can be funny at times and Luke's a big complainy-pants before he matures into his Jedi persona in SW:ROTJ but this is all part of the fun IMHO. We watched the HD remastered version last night as we are watching the six movies chronologically, one per day, leading up to when we'll be seeing SW:TFA on opening night (Empire tonight!). As ever that 1977 movie, now turned into as multi-time-remastered classic is still one of the best movies ever made. Despite being slightly marred by the now dated-looking CGI Lucas slapped on top of it (why walk a big CGI creature right infront of the Luke & Ben in the "These are not the droids you're looking for" scene?), the imagination, tension and (still) wonderful imagery in crisp HD with DTS-HD Master audio makes it one of the movies to own if you have a decent system to enjoy it on. Maybe watching it compressed to death through an Apple TV wasn't the good idea.

    --
    CN=poolmeister.OU=lurkers.CN=slashdot
  23. Baffling by JustAnotherOldGuy · · Score: 0

    The hoopla over Star Wars has always baffled me.

    Yeah, they were fun movies, they were entertaining movies, but the level of fandom has always puzzled me.

    I mean, camping out for 10 ten days in front of the theater just to be able to see the new movie? Really?

    I appreciate fandom and I think a lot of it is cool and quirky and fun, but the level of fandom that Star Wars has inspired is just, I dunno, baffling to me. And I like the movies, I think they're a ton of fun. But having a Star Wars-themed wedding seems a bit much to me.

    If that's your thing, though, go for it, and more power to you.

    Oh well, another one of life's mysteries for me to ponder. :)

    --
    Just cruising through this digital world at 33 1/3 rpm...
    1. Re:Baffling by Half-pint+HAL · · Score: 1

      I suspect a lot of Star Wars fan behaviour is reactionaryism -- they see the Trekkies wandering around with Spock-ears and want to show that Star Wars is better. Twenty years ago, the proof that Star Wars was better was that the fans didn't get involved in that sort of nonsense, and just watched the films....

      --
      Got them moderator blues I blieve I walk out the do', With these mod-points I been gettin', I 'most never post no mo'
    2. Re:Baffling by drinkypoo · · Score: 1

      The hoopla over Star Wars has always baffled me.

      The hoopla over Hollywood has always baffled me. You remember when people were seeing counselors for feeling suicidal because they couldn't go fuck furry blue people like in Avatar? But when Star Wars came out, there was nothing quite like it. Its popularity was backed up by sequels. The actors have gone the extra mile and been spectacularly good to fans. And people have a need to belong to something, and to wear silly hats, and Star Wars is as good a way to fulfill that as any. It's a damn sight better than most.

      --
      "You're right," Fisheye says. "I should have set it on 'whip' or 'chop.'"
    3. Re:Baffling by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I find your lack of faith disturbing....

    4. Re:Baffling by crunchygranola · · Score: 1

      I suspect a lot of Star Wars fan behaviour is reactionaryism -- they see the Trekkies wandering around with Spock-ears and want to show that Star Wars is better. Twenty years ago, the proof that Star Wars was better was that the fans didn't get involved in that sort of nonsense, and just watched the films....

      You obviously do not have a brother who has imagined that he is a Jedi for almost 40 years....

      --
      Second class citizen of the New Gilded Age
    5. Re:Baffling by ConceptJunkie · · Score: 1

      Were you around 20 years ago? Both franchises attract their share of People Who Take It Too Far.

      It's both a blessing and a curse that we live in a society where people have the freedom to be so obsessed over a movie, TV show, or video game, etc.

      It's obviously a blessing because we have the freedom to do so. Our societies and countries (in much of the world) aren't so oppressive that we are prevented from engaging and sharing in this kind of creative output, and a lot of us are freed from having to spend the majority of our time not starving to death or not being killed by someone else. This is most indeed a blessing I wouldn't want to trade for anything.

      The curse, of course, is that some people will trade these cultural ephemera for real life, and equate them with something deep and meaningful, which they generally aren't, not in the grand scheme of Life, the Universe and Everything. If your stated religion is "Jedi", and it's not meant ironically or as a joke, then there is probably something wrong with you.

      However, the blessings outweigh the curses in my opinion.

      --
      You are in a maze of twisty little passages, all alike.
    6. Re:Baffling by Cro+Magnon · · Score: 1

      I'd rather see people with Spock-ears than with Jar Jar-tongues!

      --
      Slow down, cowboy! It has been 4 hours since you last posted. You must wait another few hours.
    7. Re:Baffling by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Clearly you're not a woman...

  24. Not just in your memory... by srijon · · Score: 1

    Lucas made a whole bunch of alterations to the original trilogy that change the feeling of the movie. If you want to time travel back to the 70's, you need to watch the despecialized edition.

  25. What a coincidence! by jafiwam · · Score: 1

    I just sat down and watched Hardware Wars (1978, directors cut) and it demonstrated that Star Wars was a masterpiece of technical and special effects.

    Also, Luke was supposed to be a farm kid, not larger than life. The whole point was the ordinary farm kid had this in him. Duh.

    1. Re:What a coincidence! by SuiteSisterMary · · Score: 1

      Also, Luke was supposed to be a farm kid, not larger than life. The whole point was the ordinary farm kid had this in him. Duh.

      For me, the Original Trilogy clicked when I realized that Luke's 'serene detachment' throughout most of Jedi was, in fact, PTSD, possibly moving towards dissociative disorder and/or catatonia.

      --
      Vintage computer games and RPG books available. Email me if you're interested.
  26. star wars by bigCstyle · · Score: 1

    star wars definitely has not aged well... there are many more compelling stories than post-apoc Force. tbh the games and the mmo 'the old republic' have much more compelling stories. TOR in particular is kind of epic. force user factions slugging it out at the height of their power? epic. The movies are not good, and has not aged all that well, but it has spawned some epic stories from third parties

    1. Re:star wars by Half-pint+HAL · · Score: 1

      The whole force powers in computer-game-world (and in the prequels) really piss me off. If people were running at Mach 3 in living memory, why is that idiot in episode IV mocking Darth Vader for his Jedi skills? The force in the original trilogy is something far more subtle and far more peaceful. It was about awareness and mindfulness, with a little bit of influence and telekinesis thrown in. The only "powerful" stuff was the Emperor's lightning attack, and the good guys didn't even have that. It was almost like saying that good guys only have tools -- weapons are for the bad guys.

      --
      Got them moderator blues I blieve I walk out the do', With these mod-points I been gettin', I 'most never post no mo'
  27. Lightsabers are dangerous by Bruinwar · · Score: 1

    After seeing the movie for the first time after 20 some years, Obiwan letting Luke fire up his father's lightsaber kina bothered me a little. Holy crap, he's waving this thing around IN THE HOUSE! I got a 17 year old & there is no way he is playing with a lightsaber in the house. TAKE IT OUTSIDE & make damn sure the dog is inside!

    My wife would be like "NO WAY is he playing with that thing", you take it back to the store right now!"

    Dammit I must be officially old now.

    --
    SLOWER TRAFFIC KEEP RIGHT
    1. Re:Lightsabers are dangerous by Rei · · Score: 2

      Not to mention that at one point while Luke is fiddling with it he actually has it pointed at his head ;)

      That said, I think the best thing about the light sabers is how it seems to automatically inspire in nerds the same thought process: "Okay, clearly there's no obvious way in compliance with the laws of physics to make something like that... what's the closest one could actually get?

      The best I ever came up with is that it's a combination electric/plasma sword around a telescoping core. So the sound you hear on extension/retraction is a physical object expanding or retracting into the hilt. Inside it would be intense electromagnets creating a magnetic trap to circulate plasma along the exterior of the "saber". The plasma (generated by discharge in the hilt, like a plasma cutter) creates the glow, and a particular colour could be maintained by the injection of various ionizing gases that tend to emit at certain frequencies (this could be done on purpose for aesthetics, or they could just be a side effect of a coolant in the core boiling off). The plasma sheath would obviously be hot and destructive, but not intense enough on its own to, say, cut through thick metal doors or the like (if the plasma were that intense then it would be so bright you'd need welding goggles whenever you turned it on... unless you have it so high energy of its light emitted is in the X-ray spectrum, which would hardly be safer!). When the sword strikes a conductive object, however, it creates a electrical path between the plasma and its core, through the conductive surface. Detecting this, the hilt (which obviously requires an intense power source) pumps a tremendous current into the plasma (low voltage, high amperage, like is used in welding), with the central core acting as the return (either actively cooled or high-temperature superconductive). So ohmic heating is what does the melting of the target, like in welding.

      Obviously the saber and the surface being cut would become extremely bright during the cutting (something not seen in the films), but that's pretty unavoidable when you're cutting metals (even normal earth metals, let alone whatever super metals exist "a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away") Also, I'm not sure how the magnetic fields would interact when two swords struck each other. If one envisions the interference causing the occasional unstable, temporary conductive path from the sheath to the core then that could explain the electrical cracking while they're in contact (obviously if it was a constant conductive path then they'd just cut right through each others' cores).

      That's the best I ever came up with ;)

      --
      Nothing says 'welcome to the neighborhood' like a gunny sack full of dead squirrels.
    2. Re:Lightsabers are dangerous by Rei · · Score: 1

      I guess another option for the color variety would be just thermal radiation from the plasma sheath, with the temperature of the sheath indicating the colour. But that wouldn't allow for, for example, green light sabers, you never see a blackbody glow that looks green. Hmm... if the plasma wasn't in thermal equilibrium and was instead monoenergetic, that could theoretically yield whatever colour. But that would be harder to achieve and I can't envision a particular benefit to it...

      --
      Nothing says 'welcome to the neighborhood' like a gunny sack full of dead squirrels.
    3. Re:Lightsabers are dangerous by The-Ixian · · Score: 1

      No, you are just sane.... sort of... the fact that you would buy him a weapon of this power as a play thing really says something about your sense of responsibility.

      --
      My eyes reflect the stars and a smile lights up my face.
    4. Re:Lightsabers are dangerous by goarilla · · Score: 1

      That's the best I ever came up with ;)

      Well, It's better than my laser and small mirror configuration.

    5. Re:Lightsabers are dangerous by cwsumner · · Score: 1

      After seeing the movie for the first time after 20 some years, Obiwan letting Luke fire up his father's lightsaber kina bothered me a little. ...

      Luke -was- used to driving and flying vehicles with weapons, and possibly using blasters occasionally.

      There are places where children are expected to do things earlier than city people are used to. Small tractors at 5 or 6, guns at 7 or 8, cars in the back fields at 9 or 10 (because they need to be bigger to reach the controls). With supervision, though. And accidents are few, in fact lower than around cities.

      I knew people that lived in the city until about the age of 30, then took a two week course in driving. Then they were driving next to me on the expressway!! Not a good thing... 8-P

      On the other hand, I did think it was a bit unwise to wave it around in the house. But I chalked that up to the actors knowing nothing about weapons.

  28. A movie with sets by swm · · Score: 1

    Lucas gave an interview once where he explained his original motivation for making Star Wars: he wanted to make a movie with sets. The old-fashioned, Hollywood studio way. (Unlike, say American Graffiti, which was shot on location.) When you watch Star Wars, feel like you are on alien worlds, and space ships, and in outer space. But for the filmmaker, the whole thing was done on studio lots, with painted sets and props.

    I rewatched the move some years later, and it really struck me how easy it was to visualize the scenes being shot on the stage of my high-school auditorium.

  29. Saw it in the theaters, the first time! by timothy · · Score: 1

    Everybody's got an opinion, I guess, but I think Episode IV (or, let's face it, the movie that everyone means when they just say "Star Wars") holds up really well.

    - The music -- is there anyone in the world who doesn't hum along? The music is melodramatic, but is a perfect match for the tone of the movie. Epic story! Heart-stirring!
    - Princess Leia, childhood crush justified
    - Han and Chewie, one of the best science-fiction buddy pairs; always wondered about whether their mixed-language conversation was partly inspired by Lassie ("Bark! barkbarkbark! Whine, bark!" "Little Jessica's in the well, you say, and she's refusing to leave until all her demands are met, and you think she may have been hypnotized?!")
    - Special effects *still* look good to me; the more original ones generally seem more organic and real than the fancier replacements within scenes (thought the wholly new insertions are dumb)
    - The story overall
    - The camera movements and other filming choices still make it seem to me like "a modern" movie. One example: Film stock can bother me; I dislike evident grain, and the really orangey cast of a lot of '60s and '70s movies (not sure how they originally looked, but that's the way they look to me now). Star Wars has only a very slight cast; compared to others from the late '70s or early '80s (and some far more recent), it just doesn't feel dated in the same way. Some movies you get the impression that you're "watching a movie," but with Star Wars, I am totally sucked in / absorbed, even with the funny wipes between scenes. Can't see those wipes elsewhere without thinking of SW, actually.

    --
    jrnl: http://tinyurl.com/c2l8yr / foes: http://tinyurl.com/ckjno5
  30. What makes Star Wars no fun to rewatch... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    What makes it no fun to rewatch is seeing it with my daughter, who is so busy being politically correct and saying that Luke and Han should just make out and get it over with. I blame her mother, who is now doing her best to infuse science fiction conventions with so much political correctness no one can even leer at this:Harley Quinn costumes.

    Han and I knew a vital lesson: the princesses really go for the bad boys, partly because they do so love "redeeming" us. My daughter claims she doesn't believe me about any of this stuff, but when she chases girls, I notice that her "bad boy" behavior is what hooks them. The kid just has no idea of the archetypes she's living up to, partly because her mother has done her best to reinterpret everything in political correctness terms. But she is so very, very definitely my daughter!

    Heck, maybe in another 10 years, we can watch all the Seven Samurai variants, including the Magnificent Seven and the Battle Beyond the Stars, so she can get a sense of common themes in different genres of movie. Maybe as a MST3K marathon? If we can get them to do it now that they're back in business?

  31. Wine thinks the movie gets better with age? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Sentence structure anyone?

  32. maybe all that got a little gilded in my memory by Chrisq · · Score: 1

    But it now seems that maybe all that got a little gilded in my memory.

    I find your lack of faith disturbing, Michael Franco.

  33. Re:I've never understood the adult fascination wit by JonnyCalcutta · · Score: 3, Funny

    Oh, Dad. Stop coming on here and embarrassing me in front of my friends.

  34. A comic book on the big screen by swm · · Score: 1

    When I saw the original Star Wars, it was an epic.

    When I saw The Empire Strikes Back a few years later, it seemed...smaller. The plot had become parochial; the relationship between Han and Leia had degenerated to bickering. The cognitive dissonance resolved when I realized that I wasn't watching an epic: I was watching a comic book on the big screen.

  35. Makes complete sense by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    I saw Star Wars for the first time at 21. I watched the entire thing and mostly considered it a poor science fiction movie. Not terrible B-grade schlock I could laugh at, but just a poor story with little depth that would capture the interest of most kids 12 and under. I've never been a fan of the star wars franchise. Just doesn't cut it for me. The movies just don't hold my interest.

    Now, Star Trek I watched at a young age and I will forever enjoy the first movie, even though I know it's similarly terrible (Though I do believe the plot is at least a small bit more interesting than the original Star Wars, the acting sucks and the movie plods along). So, of course, I enjoy all things Star Trek.

    The rose coloured glasses you watched movies with the first time forever affects your view of sequels. I have a friend whose family was way too broke to afford TV, never mind movies when he was a kid. It's fun sitting down and watching what was considered a big time movie (Alien, Robocop, Ghostbusters, Abyss, etc.) upon release and getting a proper critical opinion. You tend to realize that some movies were products of their time, and some were really only exciting as a kid. And a few still hold up as gems today (Out of that list, Ghostbusters).

  36. It doesn't get better. Doesn't get worse by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    It may be that you look for different things in a movie now, and the story was pretty simple in ANH, and the others. However, those failures were ALWAYS admitted by the fans (see Ewoks). DESPITE those flaws, the movie is a good movie, and the staging of the scenes is top notch. The opening of ANH will remain a classic, much like the opening scene of Psycho.

    We can get away with more in movies now, so we EXPECT more out of movies.

    If ANH were brought out today, it would be middling to good. Much of that because the film redid how we do films to such an extent that the movie would be "old hat".

    This, however, is one reason why the remastered crap is really crap. It doesn't add anything to the original scenes that were worthy (apart from the attack on the death star having more than five fighters in the squadron), all the other additions were at best pointless additions, in two cases, really screwed the point of the flaming story: Han shot first BECAUSE he wasn't a hero then. He grew into one over the movie. If he shot in self defence second, he never changed from "Hero" (really, "Dumb as fuck hero"). And stupid "gag" stepping on Jabba's tail. Not only didn't work in the scene, not only not funny, but rather fucks up the reason for Han to leave, if he's so blase about Jabba he'll step on his tail without a blink, why the hell would he rush off to pay a late debt with massive compensation for being late? Obviously not scared one bit, so send off a courier or bank transfer.

    But the original were crude storytelling, the 80's version of the Harold Lloyd movies. If someone brought out one of those today, it would be "Meh", because comedy movies have moved on. Does it make those classics a bad idea to watch???

  37. Watch the de-specialized versions. by beltsbear · · Score: 3, Informative

    They are in experience in themselves. Watching them was much better than watching any of the remade versions Lucas has put out. The movie has a very genuine and unpretentious feel yet still has all the excitement you remember from when you were younger.

  38. Re:#gamergate by Applehu+Akbar · · Score: 0

    Bzzzt! That's supposed to be LGBTQNaA.

  39. Re:I've never understood the adult fascination wit by oh_my_080980980 · · Score: 1

    Yeah because Empire was a total kids flick *eye roll*

  40. You're not takng canon by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    When you claim you will take the original three as canon, you no longer have those droids AT ALL in Obiwan's life, so including that as his lie is BS under your professed restriction.

    It's why that isn't worth having in the prequels: there's no damn need to have them. What's the service life of a droid for an Alderaan princess anyway? Especially since Vader would recognise them,therefore they couldn't stay with the Organa family unless they refused ever to go to Corsucant with the droids,which makes them odd to include in the ship Leia was caught on.

    It doesn't fit, and there's no damn need for it either.

    Stormtrooper rifles on CIWS mode are really REALLY inaccurate. It's a plot device. But it could be that the tactical use of a spray and pray weapon, especially if there's no need to ever reload, could be worth it. You don't WANT accurate close in to provide covering fire. If the blaster had a precise mode where it took time to collimate the beam and make it shoot precisely, so an ambush or sniping position could be filled with the same mass-stamped weapon and a simple mode change on the gun could save the sniper if they're jumped in close quarters where a precise weapon is worse than a club, the process could be tactically sound AND allow stormtroopers to be precise.

    The AK47 is supposed to be pretty damn inaccurate beyond about 30 yards, but it's VERY cheap to make, VERY robust and most shots, even by trained troops, will often miss if aimed anyway beyond that distance, it becomes not a liability, but a compromise to design that is a net benefit.

    But really, it's no more than plot armour for the heroes. Accept it as plot armour.

    1. Re:You're not takng canon by crunchygranola · · Score: 1

      The AK47 is supposed to be pretty damn inaccurate beyond about 30 yards....

      Not the most accurate assault rifle, true, but it is fine at least out to 100 yards.

      --
      Second class citizen of the New Gilded Age
    2. Re:You're not takng canon by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      R2 and 3PO weren't Leia's. They went into the service of Captain Antilles after Padma gave birth, to disappear among all the other droids. 3PO was wiped for security but nobody thought to wipe the astromech. It's just an astromech! It doesn't even talk!
      Captain Antilles' job for the Organa family is transporting them around safely. It's why he was there when Obi-wan and Padma met up with Senator Organa and it's why he's there years later trying to escort Princess Leia back home.

  41. Simple Explanation by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Well you see children have a lean, muscular, healthy imagination.. where as adult imaginations are, well, fat and flabby.

  42. Bah and humbug. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Some people -- and this kinda weirds me out -- forget what it's like to be a kid. Or have this rose-colored glass through which they view childhood. I enjoy IV just as much now as I did back then (though I grant you the novelty wore off a while ago). But it's a fun story! Are the special effects awesome by today's standards? No -- but they hold up remarkably well for being 30+ years old. Etc. At the end of the day, though, the story's still the story, and the characters haven't changed. It's still the corny jokes, the incestuous romance (yetch!), and so forth, and I love it.

    So I guess, if you're the kind of person who reads a book at 40 that you read at 15, and don't like it, maybe you should avoid revisiting IV & Co. But if you realize that things have changed, you're more mature, but you can still enjoy fun stuff, then hell yeah, watch 'em all, and have a damn marathon!

    $.02...

  43. Here, let me help. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Posting AC for obvious reasons.

    I have laserdisc rips of the original trilogy, starting with a movie called "Star Wars." No bloody episode IV or New Hope crap.

    Oh, Han doesn't shoot first if you recall. Han shoots, and Greedo dies. Greedo didn't even have a chance.

    I'll get it up on torrent this evening.

  44. I get it, but don't think it was fair to the movie by King_TJ · · Score: 5, Interesting

    Technically, the author of the original article is probably right. C3P0 *was* a pretty annoying robot, and I remember having the realization that he grated on my nerves a bit the last time I re-watched the original Star Wars episode 4 too.

    And sure, the quality of the costumes of the aliens aren't all that impressive by today's standards.

    But I wonder how many other movies, cartoons or TV shows he remembered fondly as a kid but didn't ever re-watch as an adult? Because wow, if you do that with some of them I personally loved as a kid, it's brutal how awful they really are. (I grew up liking shows like "Super Friends" in the 70's -- and that's a GREAT example of a cartoon best left as a childhood memory and not EVER revisited!)

    I think with the original Star Wars series though? I've gone into it with expectations adjusted for the era. Before Star Wars, there were hardly ANY movies dealing with aliens or outer space that weren't completely cheesy! Viewed through that filter, I find it stands up pretty well today as some of the best film-making of the 70's dealing with the genre. Those cool blaster sounds? They came up with banging on steel tension wires holding up telephone poles to get those! They didn't have all the computer and CGI tech. we take for granted today to pull any cool sound desired out of a hat. And new technology had to be developed just to film Star Wars, with cameras running along wires and so forth.

    Not only that, but the first time I re-watched Star Wars as a young adult, I remember being really shocked/impressed by the complete lack of cursing in the films. That became such a "staple" for any movie with action and explosions in it, it seemed strangely missing from Star Wars. But that's part of the beauty of it. Nobody needed to drop an F bomb to get the point across that someone was scared or tense or angry. It was all kept very clean and kid-friendly without becoming sappy.

  45. Justifying fantasy. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    "...the idea that someday I would learn to control people through the power of suggestion and a wave of my hand.But it now seems that maybe all that got a little gilded in my memory."

    If you're having such a difficult time suspending yourself in fantasy for two hours watching the old one, care to tell me why you're preparing to spend a considerable amount of money and time to try and do it again?

    Seriously, I hope you're not expecting the new movie to be more of a documentary because the ISS now exists, or have less hand waiving in it because you don't believe in Santa Claus or The Force anymore.

    It's called "Star Wars". We can't even get to our own damn moon again, so I'd say the plot line is still solidly buried in fantasy.

  46. I've seen them recently by tompaulco · · Score: 1

    I've seen them recently and they were exactly as I remembered them. I enjoyed them. I haven't seen the prequels yet. I've seen parts of the prequels but after having seen those parts, could not force myself to watch the whole thing.
    The new one coming out, from the previews, looks like it will be Star Wars meets Batman Returns. It looks to be very dark, unlike the light hearted action of the first movies. I usually don't care for dark, so I probably won't like the new one. I may or may not see it in the theater depending what I hear from friends. I'm sure many of my friends will have seen it by Saturday morning.

    --
    If you are not allowed to question your government then the government has answered your question.
  47. Amen! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    The Zahn Trilogy were what made me love Star Wars. Without that, I'm not that keen on the new movies.

    We'll see if I change my mind.

  48. I'll just leave this here.... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Watch the Original Star Wars Trilogy As It Was Before George Lucas Screwed It Up:
    http://lifehacker.com/watch-th...

  49. Re:I've never understood the adult fascination wit by SecurityGuy · · Score: 2

    Because we were kids once and nostalgia is a thing.

  50. Re:I've never understood the adult fascination wit by The-Ixian · · Score: 1

    I agree with you in the sense that SW is a children's franchise. I loved SW as a kid (but only for the last 20 minutes of space battling), but then by the time Empire came out I wasn't so enthralled anymore.

    I don't know, I will always have a soft spot for the original, like many my age, but I certainly don't live for the movies.

    Now, the Star Wars universe is *very* compelling to me. The idea of alien civilizations who have lived with technology for thousands of years before we were even walking upright and which appears to be magic to us... THAT is cool to think about. Probably my favorite interpretation of Star Wars is the MMO "Star Wars: The Old Republic" which is very creative and really takes time to delve into many unique and inspired stories.

    --
    My eyes reflect the stars and a smile lights up my face.
  51. I can't be the only one by truck_soccer · · Score: 1

    Am I the only person that thinks star wars is nothing but an overrated merch machine? I was exposed to star wars for most of my childhood, and sure I liked it when I was 7-8 years old. But as I matured, so did my taste in fiction I suppose. The last movie I saw with my father was Episode 1 and I have regretted it ever since. I haven't even seen the other 2 prequels, and I don't plan to. I also don't plan to see this new one, if only to show my distaste for having everything that I remember beign chopped/screwed/repackaged and force-fed through every available media and merchandising outlet. If there is one thing that I loathe, it is being marketed to. Yuck. Most people seem to eat that shit up with a spoon though.

    1. Re:I can't be the only one by Sir_Eptishous · · Score: 1

      You're right about the merch part. Since Disney took over, I can't throw a rock without it hitting an image of either Yoda or Darth Vader. It is reprehensible, but not surprising. This is Disney were talking about...

      What is amazing is compared to the merch from the original three films, Disney has taken it up more than one notch.

      But were talking about a guy who made an incredibly insightful deal regarding merchandising(Billions of $$$ in TOYS!!!) with the studio to finance the first film, and then used the winnings from that first film to finance the rest himself, in effect becoming an independent film maker.

      With all that being said, with all the hype, the money, blah diddy blah, blah blah, should we hate the films?
      If you don't like them fine, but a lot of people, myself included are HUGE Star Wars fans, and love to watch them, and can't wait to see the next one.
      Just because something is popular and makes money doesn't necessarily mean it is devoid of entertainment value, or any other reasons that people love a certain film, book or piece of music.

      --
      We play the game with the bravery of being out of range
    2. Re:I can't be the only one by truck_soccer · · Score: 1

      Agreed. Popularity does not automatically mean something is drivel, but in my experience that is more often true than not (this is my opinion, and I am a grumpy bastard). I had wrestled with this notion in my years as a snotty, teen-aged music elitist, and many of those undesirable traits still remain. As I get older, however, it seems that my ability to suspend disbelief and be entertained is ever dwindling, especially when the marketing and advertising sector is so blatantly pandering for my dollars. It just turns me off. The whole notion of my special niche lifestyle becoming the new cash cow for Kraft Foods and General Electric (just examples) has caused me to distance myself from it outright. I am basically a cynical bastard and the nostalgia card doesn't work on me and I will die miserable and alone.

    3. Re:I can't be the only one by cwsumner · · Score: 1

      You are right... except:

      This was the film that -made- the merchandising strategy. There were a few movie based toys before thet, but they were small stuff compared to this.
      It was a movie that people liked so much, that they -wanted- to buy lots of the toys. It was a first in many ways.
      The marketing only works if people want it to work, reguardless of what the salespeople think.

    4. Re:I can't be the only one by truck_soccer · · Score: 1

      And as we all know: "First is worst"

  52. Obi-Wan by Blaskowicz · · Score: 1

    Yes when watching the original again it's amazing how few lines Obi-Wan says in the entire movies.
    Perhaps the conversation felt deep when watching as kid even though it's very short.
    I still want to believe the movie is about Obi-Wan. It's something that can happen in real life. You encounter an old man that you instantly recognise as trustworthy and caring, like some aura is emanating of him. Benevolence and well-being, wisdom.

    That's about the opposite of depictions of old people as old-fashioned, bigoted, inflexible, repulsive or downright evil (e.g. the big bad corporate executive, the remorseless senator or vice-president that has shady deals with the aliens and a rogue intelligence organization, etc.)

    Nope, Obi-Wan is your ideal grandpa or dad right away, or that one teacher that got a full classroom of whiny bastard children complying from the first to the last day, doing nothing other than, er, teaching.

  53. Hm by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Have to disagree with this one, it stands up as a great piece of film making in all the ways that matter, though dated in some technical ways. I think it's more likely that his brain has grown accustomed to modern day cgi fests and it was too jarring seeing something old school. I also suspect the author is too young to have seen it as an older child/adult with contextual knowledge of film when it first came out and doesn't fully grasp just how revolutionary it was, and how influential it remains, even in less than obvious ways. It combined the best of serials, avant film makers like Kurosawa, and the spirit of the late 70s. If you don't like it that's personal taste and your prerogative, but that shouldn't be an indictment of the film.

  54. I must be a nutter by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    But episode 4 and 5 get played in my house once a month on average. If you had to "go" back and watch it again, then I would say you really aren't a star wars fan.

  55. If you want to enjoy old Star Wars nostalgia, by bjdevil66 · · Score: 0

    watch the best short parodies of it.

    The best, IMO - Robot Chicken's Emperor Palpatine going off about the Death Star.

    If you want a great view of what the prequels could have been and burn a few joules off saying, "Damn it," a few more times about what they actually are, here's one man's great takes on Ep. 1 and Ep. 2. It's too bad he wasn't actually a Fox exec...

    1. Re:If you want to enjoy old Star Wars nostalgia, by userw014 · · Score: 1

      Look for the Auralnauts Star Wars inspired works on YouTube, but these need to be viewed starting from "EP I: Jedi Party".

      Or maybe not, if you can't stand the idea of Jedi Knights being insufferable drug addicted douchebags and androids being deranged psychopaths.

  56. dumbass by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    I watch the three originals whenever they come on, which is usually several times a year. They are still the best, I have only seen the three new ones once and they sucked. I don't really care about the new one at all.

  57. Wrong film by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    "watched Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope"

    Maybe he should have just watched the original Star Wars, without the subtitle.

  58. It was the speed... by SigmaTao · · Score: 1

    When I watched the original Star Wars, first we went as a family to the London opening, so it was a "Big Deal" (tm).
    Second though, was that the pace of the movie was so much faster than anything I had ever seen!
    It was so fast for me, that details about the plot or whether is made sense or not, simply did not apply.
    It was all about the rush of the new, the space and landscapes, the machines and the simplistic mystical idea of good is better than evil because of a mystical life "force" which a kid was able to let flow through him at a crucial moment. It wasn't even that the kid couldn't have done it on his own, but rather, that the odds were weighted in his favour because of this "force".
    They could have taken the "force" out of the movie completely and it would still have made sense. People fight with swords without needing a "force", he could have hit the exhaust port without the "force" too. It just added an extra level of intrigue and mystery.
    If I compare it with 2001: A Space Odyssey, for example, the pace of Stars Wars was extreme.
    Of all the considerations of making another in the series, the pacing is one of the key elements, and I hope they get that right in the Force Awakens.

    1. Re:It was the speed... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      It's interesting that you mention that... I was watching the original the other day, and I noted that the pace of the movie would be considered slow and plodding by modern standards... of course, nowadays, movies have to run at light speed to capture the short attention spans of the audience. It's really a shame, since some of the best movies of all time would be considered "unwatchable" by today's standards, because of their slow pace. Imagine if 2001 came out today? People would fall asleep. Society needs to slow down a bit--not everything has to be EXTREME SUPER FAST!!! all the time.

  59. Re:I get it, but don't think it was fair to the mo by The-Ixian · · Score: 1

    Wait.... 3CPO was annoying?

    I thought that robot was about the only classy guy in the movie.

    Now, R2D2.... that bot was freaking annoying.

    --
    My eyes reflect the stars and a smile lights up my face.
  60. I know what he means by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    I was about 19 when the original Star Wars film came out and I absolutely loved it. Maybe a decade or so ago the series was re-released in British cinemas so I went to see the first one again. And came out thinking, "well that wasn't really up to much". So I didn't bother going to see the rest of them.

    I very rarely go to the cinema, so I don't think my perspective has been affected by more recent releases.

  61. Nothing will spoil it by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    To me Star Wars is a hot summer day on the Somerset theatre with my friend Ben.

    I was 14 and that day is still etched in my brain.

    Till this day every time i hear the opening music I get shivers.

    I have maybe a half dozen perfect days in my life and treasure them,

  62. F U Michael Franco by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    I watch this movie every year and it is still awesome.

  63. Counter point... by vtTom · · Score: 1

    You simply can't watch these movies through the eyes of an adult. You need to be a kid again. I provide the following counterpoint, which totally gets it... https://www.youtube.com/watch?...

  64. Re:I get it, but don't think it was fair to the mo by Keiran+Halcyon · · Score: 1

    The thing is, he really isn't that annoying in the original trilogy. He's hapless and completely pessimistic, but he's not that annoying. In the prequels, however, he's gone to complete bumbling stupidity and slapstick humor at his expense, sometimes to the ridiculously improbable level. Look at ESB; Luke and Han are missing, and Threepio stupidly tells Leia how long the odds are. Afterward, he realizes what he did, and he super-awkwardly tries to apologize to her to make her feel better. He understands how big a mistake he made, and in a completely droid-like way, tries to fix it. In AotC, on the other hand, he's literally chopped up in a cartoon-like fashion and reassembled with different body parts and accidentally participates in the battle, all the while telling snarky bad jokes. There's no deeper layer of subtle understanding; he's just gone from the pessimistic character to the comic relief.

  65. Re:I've never understood the adult fascination wit by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    The original was clearly a kid's movie

    No it fucking wasn't.

    Once we got to the part with Ewoks, then yeah they were trying to make it more kid friendly.

    By the time we got to Episode one they were beyond kid friendly and were apparently targeting retards.

  66. Re:I've never understood the adult fascination wit by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    I do a lot of 3D printing and I swear if I see one more Yoda head

    Something about having a greased up Yoda in my asshole right now...

  67. Re:I've never understood the adult fascination wit by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    You are exhibiting symptoms of extreme butthurt.

  68. Who shot first? by theendlessnow · · Score: 1

    Apparently Michael Franco shot first.

  69. Nope, it's still great! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Just watched the original today after recently seeing the three new ones back to back. It still holds up very well. Whoever wrote this article doesn't know what they are talking about.

    With the movie fresh in my mind, my complaints were:

    - There's a "computer" type of sound you hear constantly droning in the background when they are on most spaceships. It's very irritating.

    - Some dialogue is delivered too fast and needed some natural pauses.

    That's really it. If anything, the biggest offender was the extra crap Lucas CGI'd in to the scenes which was hugely distracting.

  70. Re-watching restored my youthful impression by userw014 · · Score: 1

    I was a snarky teenager when I saw the original Star Wars (no IV: A New Hope), and I was impressed by how much the audience laughed at every campy, over-acted scene and every bit of rote dialogue. Of course, that was basically the whole movie.

    Up until recently, whenever I re-watched the movies, I was never able to re-capture that delightful feeling of camp from the first movie (IV: A New Hope), but last night I did - and I noticed (again) all of the Star-Trek sound effects (quietly in the background), the use of Photon Torpedoes (did they ever make it to other movies), and so on.

    This isn't an endorsement of the new movie, which I haven't seen - and I'm sure it's not the kind of endorsement anyone who has fallen in love with the movies would care to hear. But it's my experience of re-watching the first movie and how I was able to recapture the magic I felt back then when R2D2 being zapped and falling over had the audience groaning with laughter over the well deserved fate of an annoying character (but all of the characters were annoying to that audience.)

  71. Watch Episode I to put things back in line by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    A few seconds of Jar Jar will make Mark Hamill's portrayal of Luke seem like an Oscar winning performance. Warning: it may make you lose all faith that VII will have any chance of decency.

  72. That's pretty harsh by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Are you saying that because of all the remakes and extra shit, you can't even stomach watching the untouched original theatrical release?

  73. If you think re-watching starwars is bad... by CaptnCrud · · Score: 1

    I tried re-watching the police academy movies just recently....just don't do it. Some things are better left as fond memories.

  74. Merchandising... by FUD+fighter · · Score: 1

    Would you accept Star Wars: The Toaster instead?

    --
    Knowing it all since the late 70's.
  75. Face it: Star Wars is DEAD by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    It died a long time ago, and what we've been seeing is just zombie-Star Wars, being propped up by whoever had control of the rights to it. I've got exactly zero interest in this new 'Star Wars themed movie', and sure as heck aren't going to pay to see it.

    The above also applies to Star Trek; it died much more recently, and anything that came afterwards is just a 'Star Trek-themed science fantasy adventure movie', having only superficial resemblance to what I remember.

  76. the effects this, the dialogue that, cp3o this... by brunokummel · · Score: 2

    For a person who says he wasn't much of a whiner when he was 9, the author sure got better at it over the years....

    --
    What is best in life? To crush your enemies, to see them driven before you and to hear the lamentations of their women.
  77. Re:It was never meant to be good by DesertNomad · · Score: 1

    Gene Roddenberry had publicly marketed Star Trek (TOS) as a Western in outer space—a so-called "Wagon Train to the Stars." (from the "roddenberry.com" website).
    The original Star Wars also reflected a throughback to the 1930's through 1950's styles for serialized westerns, science fiction, etc., with the aforementioned "cheesy" scene transitions, the fairly simple characters, the obvious good vs bad.
    Star Wars is still as much fun to watch now as it was then.

  78. College showing by BitwizeGHC · · Score: 1

    Back before TPM came out, my college (I know, I'm old) had a special showing of the original trilogy.

    What I couldn't get over was how hokey it all was. What had seemed to me as a kid to be the very pinnacle of epicness (next to Robotech) came across as cheesy, with lame dialogue and a simplistic plot. Yes, even Empire: all its vaunted "darkness" was quite clearly a way of setting up a cliffhanger to make damned sure you were at the theater when Jedi came out.

    But it was the best kind of hokey: it was labor-of-love hokey, it wasn't trying to be anything else. It was entertainment in the fullest sense of the word, and it's clear that the people who made these movies, cared passionately about entertaining the audience. So I discovered a new kind of fun and appreciation in watching Star Wars.

    --
    N4st0r, trixx0r h0bb1tz0rz! Th3y st0l3 0ur pr3c10uzz!
  79. Lucas was an amazing idiot by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Lucas was just an amazing idiot.

    I think the downfall started with Vader being Luke's father and neither Kenobi nor Yoda telling him before the confrontation. It was no wonder that they had to have Yoda confirm it, because Vader, the evilz villain had every reason to lie; but didn't. An both Kenobi and Yoda lied about it. Kenobi by saying Vader killed him, and Yoda by omission.

    And Lucas's magnificent creation went down hill from there.

  80. Or maybe the writer's not so sophisticated by whitroth · · Score: 1

    I think it plays well.. but I saw it when it *first* opened in Philly, as an adult, who'd read tons of sf & fantasy. And had seen the old serials. This writer's still missing a lot of the movie.

    But then, I really liked Episode 3, which was the episode 3 I'd been waiting for, and apparently 90% of you, at least, still don't understand.

    Nor did the utter and complete MORONS who brought their 9 yr olds to see it; that clearly did not understand PC-13, nor much of anything else....

                          mark "clue: Oedipus Rex"

    1. Re:Or maybe the writer's not so sophisticated by Jack+Griffin · · Score: 1

      But then, I really liked Episode 3, which was the episode 3 I'd been waiting for, and apparently 90% of you, at least, still don't understand.

      >

      I understand it alright, it was just shit. It's already been said a million times elsewhere, but trust me, it was shit.

    2. Re:Or maybe the writer's not so sophisticated by whitroth · · Score: 1

      Well, no, I think you don't. Did you understand that it was intended, explicitly, as a Greek tragedy, complete with chorus, and as stylized as one, or like a Noh play?

      Most folks these days aren't happy with tragedies.

                    mark "and the US can't even get *anyone* to orbit"

    3. Re:Or maybe the writer's not so sophisticated by Jack+Griffin · · Score: 1

      Well, no, I think you don't. Did you understand that it was intended, explicitly, as a Greek tragedy, complete with chorus, and as stylized as one, or like a Noh play?

      Most folks these days aren't happy with tragedies.

      Trust me, I get it. The greatest tragedy was the script, the direction, the plot, the special effects and the casting...

  81. Never Saw Them as a Child by sudon't · · Score: 1

    I was in high school, a senior, when the original Star Wars came out. I was definitely not a nerd, and didn't see it. Really, I don't remember it being big in the culture at the time. No one I knew talked about it, and all that came later, in the eighties.
    A couple of years ago I decided to finally watch them all, in order. By then, of course, it was such a large part of the culture that I knew much of what was supposed to happen in the films, and certainly I'd seen bits and pieces of the films over the years. What struck me was how cheesy the original Star Wars was. It really is a children's movie, not the kind of thing that would interest most adults. It seems to me that one has to have seen Star Wars as a child in order for it to really capture your imagination. I can imagine how going back to it might lead to disappointment. The rest of the series wasn't that much more impressive, either. IMHO, of course. But compare it to 2001: A Space Odyssey, which came out ten years earlier.

    --
    -- sudon't

    Air-ride Equipped

    1. Re:Never Saw Them as a Child by Radical+Moderate · · Score: 1

      Really, I don't remember it being big in the culture at the time. No one I knew talked about it, and all that came later, in the eighties. one I knew talked about it, and all that came later, in the eighties.

      It may not have been a big deal to you, but it was a big deal. The theater that showed it in my town had huge lines for weeks. It was the biggest grossing movie of the year. Until ET was released in 1982, it was the highest grossing film of all time.

      --
      Never let a lack of data get in the way of a good rant.
  82. Not the original by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    If you're using the words "A New Hope" in any form, you weren't watching the original. The original was called "Star Wars".

  83. existential by micahraleigh · · Score: 1

    Star Wars is a timeless, existential masterpiece.

    Luke wasn't really trying to destroy the Empire as much as he was trying to come to terms with his own beliefs and the extent he was willing to go for them.

    He ended up trusting an old guy in a desert for his career and trying to save a man who was able to ruin the galaxy.

    Along the way he fought not only against storm troopers, but against the Public who thought he should settle for something more mediocre.

    The prequel trilogy was about interactions between societies, gobs of people, bloviating about the common good, blah, blah, nothing to be confused with greatness.

    You can tell that JJ Abrams gets this because in the trailer he explicitly and unapologetically confronts the viewer as an individual. "You have that power too".

    The original trilogy gets a lot of attention because of flashy swords and space dog fights, but it really establishes the inward authority of the franchise.

  84. WEG's Extended Universe by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    And its tie-ins to the 'non-canon' media projects, the LucasArts videogames, Shadows of the Empire, the various Micro Machines toys (Prior to the Hasbro buyout of Playmates and WotC).

    The world that made Star Wars magical to me wasn't Lucas world. It was a collective word of dozens to hundreds of creative individuals many of whom at least ATTEMPTED some semblance of consistency with their compatriots, to greater or lesser degrees. (EU was more internally consistent than the prequels were with the original trilogy, for instance.)

  85. JEDI, not NEW HOPE by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    If you are going to watch just one, then watch RETURN OF THE JEDI, as that is the last thing that happened before this one.

    BUT...

    J.J. Abrams screwed up Star Trek by creating to campy films despite great effects and I expect him to screw this one up just as much. In fact I'm going out on a limb and predicting it's going to be one of those lame pass the torch type movies. He will probably have Luke Skywalker dragged through the plumbing of a star destroyer like the fat kid on Willy Wonka.

    It was stupid to let him be the director. And Lucas could have done a great job if he would remember what made A NEW HOPE great... Subtlety! Not a bunch of slapstick nonsense (which we saw in the later films).

    I'm going to go see it this weekend, but I don't expect it to be as good as the previews.

  86. Indeed. If you can't hit a Wookie from 10 feet... by Radical+Moderate · · Score: 1

    ...you need more range time.

    --
    Never let a lack of data get in the way of a good rant.
  87. Instant Cassettes! by roesti · · Score: 1

    I picked up the VHS cassette of this about half-way through seeing it at the cinema. Thank you, Instant Cassettes!

  88. It's a kid's movie by Zobeid · · Score: 1

    When Star Wars was new, I was 11 years old, and I thought it was the greatest movie of all times. And it may still be the greatest movie of all time -- for 11 year olds. Now I'd rather watch 2001 or The Right Stuff -- or The Martian. Now I can actually appreciate Blade Runner, too. And as for Star Wars. . . eh. . . yeah, it's still fun, once in a while, and so are all those legions of superhero movies these days, but it's all kid stuff. I don't want to live on a steady diet of kid stuff, and it's a little disheartening that there's so much of it, and that the kiddie shows get the huge budgets and production values these days. Star Wars (plus a nod to Raiders of the Lost Ark) did that. It led us to this infantile place.

    The intense focus on sequels and franchises irritates me too. How much did Disney pay for the Star Wars franchise? Billions? There's absolutely nothing in there that they couldn't have created their own counterpart to -- and it would have been fresher. Why can't we get that Ringworld movie that's been rumored for decades? Why not bring some of the other classic worlds from SF literature to the big screen, or just do something all new? It seems we've reached the point where originality is not merely devalued, but is actually feared and loathed.

  89. Forbidden Planet was my Star Wars by shoor · · Score: 1

    I was about the same age when I saw 'Forbidden Planet' in its 1st run as the OP was when he saw 'Star Wars' (That's what it was called when I saw it in its 1st run in theaters.)

    I have to say, my overall opinion of FP hasn't changed much. I loved the philosophical implications then and I still do now. I didn't like the stupid mushy romance between the Captain and Altaira then and I still don't like it now. I liked the special effects then (though even as a kid I could see that clunky, barely able to walk Robbie wasn't a very practical design), and I still like them now. (One difference, now I can see the monster without getting nightmares.)

    After seeing 'Star Wars', I left the theater thinking it was a lot of fun, but overall, probably not quite as good as Lucas's 'American Graffitti'. Hmm, I wonder, if I saw 'American Graffitti' again, would I think that had aged well or poorly.

    --
    In theory, theory and practice are the same; in practice they're different. (Yogi Berra & A. Einstein)
  90. Re:I get it, but don't think it was fair to the mo by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    I just wanted to mention that I appreciate the fact that there wasn't any cursing. What really grinds my gears are series that make up curse words (Frack-ing, Schtako etc).

    If they wanted to retain their lower age ratings, why not just leave that out of there and use different words from the English language that aren't curse words. They took it out because they didn't want children to hear them, but they left the imaginary ones in there to give the adults a sense of the feeling/urgency/anger felt by the person saying them at the time. Unfortunately for me, every time I heard one of those totally ruined any immersion or connection I was feeling at the time.

  91. Or try the uncut version instead by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    If you haven't seen it, there is the fan (plural) -made Star Wars (and Empire Strikes Back) Uncut, which is pure genius, and mucho fun:
    http://www.starwarsuncut.com/

  92. Saw it the first day. by motherofgeeks · · Score: 1

    I saw the original Star Wars movie on the day it came out and was blown away. The special effects were so awesome for the time. Will never forget how much I enjoyed it.

  93. Jar-Jar the Sith by Keybounce · · Score: 1

    Everything else is a mere annoyance, even Jar Jar Binks.

    Jar-Jar was a competent Force user, very likely Sith by the end of the trilogy.
    https://www.reddit.com/r/StarW...

    Quick summary: Drunken Fist martial arts, highly successful even when the odds are against him, waves his hand before people agree with him, so low-keyed that people under-estimate him (so no one pays too much attention, letting him be out of the spotlight).

    At the start of the trilogy? He's helping the good guys.
    By the end? He's working with Palpatine.

    Every aspect of the pacing puts him as the foil to Luke or Yoda from the original trilogy. He's just not looking for attention.

  94. Ohiously this asshole was never a fan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    If you haven't seen an episode of Star Wars in 10 or 20 years... Then you aren't a fan. Don't tell me to skip watching it because it "wasn't as good as I remembered it to be"..... Fucking really? I actually watch A New Hope two nights ago on blue ray.

    It's like the kids in elementary school back in the 90s. I had a vast array of actio figures and collectibles including a printed vinyl soundtrack, limited vintage 1980 rancor with action jaw, and darth vader with the extra long lightsaber. They used to make fun and tease me for drawing scenes from Star Wars. They were so mean and once it triggered a bully to break my glasses. No lie. THEN when Episode 3 hit the theater, guess who showed up wearing lightsabers and masks?... Those assholes. Same bully that broke my glasses happens to be sitting behind me "Dude! Jack! you like Star Wars too?" Fuck you guy. Just because it's after high school doesn't mean we are friends. I didn't show up wearin trendy shit. I showed up drunk and high. Maybe I'm not the fan... Oh wait nvm. Fuck this article.

  95. I was in middle school when Star Wars came out. by ToddInSF · · Score: 1

    It made a huge impression. That being said, though I was a child, the thing is just as I remembered it. Like most movies and TV shows I saw as a child. Some people alter their memories markedly with age more than others, this is not uncommon. It's funny to me, I saw No Highway In The Sky on TV around the same time, and that flick is pretty much the same as I remember (awesome). Maybe the issue is something else, having to do with how you've changed, and not so much about the actual flick.

  96. Star Wars has always sucked by hucker75 · · Score: 1

    Star Wars (and Star Trek) has always sucked, Stargate is WAY better.

  97. We remember in 'High Definition' by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Humans seem to remember everything in High Definition (we don't but you get my meaning), regardless of how crappy the original was (eg my friend remembers Gigantor as being 'green', but of course he was Black and White on the TV)

  98. NOW THAT'S WHAT I CALL POD RACING by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Sorry, your son is a simpleton.

  99. Re:I've never understood the adult fascination wit by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    I was 6 and saw these movies in the theatre when they came out. But you seem to completely fail to realize the impact these had any EVERYONE who saw them at the time. It's like you're looking at King Kong and saying "meh, bad special effects".

    These movies were unlike anything anyone had ever seen before. They changed movies and movie going as we know it. My mother and her friends were just as blown away as everyone else.

  100. ... In ourselves by cwsumner · · Score: 1

    The problem is not in the old films, at least no more than originally. It is in our older selves, worn down and jaded, no longer able to maintain the necessary "willing suspension of disbelief". A good movie requires work from the viewer, not just the actors, writers and crew.

    Besides, any hollywood movie is tacky, to a person who makes their living making the real tech! 8-)

    However, make sure you know which version you have, Lucas changed the later versions of the movies. 8-(

  101. Princess Leia's Slave Bikini vs. Digital Effects by TKJR · · Score: 1

    I recall having a similar discussion into the variance in Batman movies, after the original Joker (btw the ages 9-15). I felt a societal change back then, and why any follow up movies don't appeal to me. I can think of one anomaly and that was Heath Ledger’s stellar performance in the Dark Night Rises. Even as a boy I think Princess Leia's rescue and attire would be appreciated more than a better digital experience.

  102. Star Wars: Despeciallized Edition by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    There is a fan-produced edition that cuts out all the BS and returns as closely as possible to the original theatrical release, but in HD. I haven't watched it yet, but a quick skim looks like pretty decent production quality.