Send In The Clowns Isn't it rich, are we a pair? Me here at last on the ground, you in mid air! Send in the clowns!
Isn't it bliss, don't you approve? One who keeps tearing around, one who can't move! Where are the clowns? Send in the clowns!
Just when I stopped, opening doors finally knowin' the one that I wanted was yours, making my entrance again, with my usual flair sure of my lines, but no one is there!
Don't you love farce? My fault I fear! I thought that you'd want what I want I'm sorry my dear! Quick, send in the clowns . . . Don't bother . . . they're here!
Isn't it rich, isn't it queer? Losing my timing this late in my career! Where are the clowns? There's gotta be clowns! Maybe next year.
Titties, titties, titties How I love to squeeze you Pinch and suck you With a lick, cleavage touches dick Fuck, fuck, fucking Those muy grande tatas (shouts to la raza!)
You win, dude. Keep posting Mr. Goaty, and enjoy
this special tribute to Big Ass Spork!!!
I DO IT WRONG!, adapted for the stage by
YourMissionForToday. Originally written by
Big Ass Spork.
INT. COFFEE HOUSE-NIGHT.
A BEATNIK stands pensively on stage in a smoky coffee house.
A WHALIN' SAX and COO-COO BONGOS begin to play, followed by some
WAY-HIP VIBES (xylophone).
BEATNIK Laying here in the shadows of my room, I squint up at my love.
My Ms. Portman. I am sore and tired after fucking her for
eight solid hours. My chapped and aching dick is soaking in
grits to relieve the pain. She gets on her knees and starts
lapping the grits up out of the bowl. She places her beautiful
hands on my penis and starts to lick the grits off my achy
piece. Massaging my nutsack she....
The Beatnik flicks his cigarette as the sax and vibes trail
off, leaving only the bongos.
BEATNIK (quietly) Wait...I do it wrong...
The Beatnik pauses to light another cigarette.
BEATNIK Yanking my dick out of her mouth I throw her to the ground and
shove it in to her gaping freshly fisted ass.
A DANCER dressed as Queen Amidala approaches the stage. She
carries a bucket of hot grits in one hand, and huge rubber penis
in the other. Beatnik takes the penis, bends her over and
pantomimes rough anal sex.
DANCER OH BIG ASS SPORK-Daddy!! Fuck my ass, fuck my ass good.
DEEPER, my coo-coo stallion, deeper!! Make a Beowulf cluster
of sperm on my back!!
BEATNIK Imagine a Beowulf cluster of this baby!
BEATNIK (together with DANCER) Wait!!! I do it wrong!!!
BEATNIK I continue to hump her alabaster form. Glistening with beads
of sweat, she bites her lip in delight as I tear her ass open
with my engorged dick. Queen Amidala!! I shriek as I near
climax.
DANCER You are so alive in me, unlike *BSD or VA Software!!! Fill me
with seed!! Yes, Yes, Yess!!!!
VOICE (FROM OFFSTAGE) For me you are calling, hhhmmm?
BEATNIK YODA?!? What the fuck, can't you see I am using the force
here?
YODA appears from offstage, carrying a huge green rubber
penis. After a brief fight, Yoda impales the Beatnik with his
penis, and he dies a messy death covered in blood, spunk, and
hot grits.
BEATNIK (dying, as the sax climaxes) Wait, my brothers and sisters....I DO IT WRONG!
Afterwards, the cast gets up and takes a bow.
CAST Thanks very much. All your sporkz are belong to the dead
homiez!!
You hit submit without proof reading your post (should have paid attention: Use the Preview Button!). I have decided to correct your post, see it below.
Most people don't read comments by dumbasses with 0 karma.
Actually you post at 0 at -4 thru 0 karma, post at -1 from -5 karma and down. I am at -6 right now, you have to be a real peckerwood to mod down a known troll/crapflooder who already posts at -1...
Laying here in the shadows of my room, I squint up at my love. My Ms. Portman. I am sore and tired after fucking her for eight solid hours. My chapped and aching dick is soaking in grits to relieve the pain. She gets on her knees and starts lapping the grits up out of the bowl. She places her beautiful hands on my penis and starts to lick the grits off my achy piece.
Massaging my nutsack she....
WAIT, I DO IT WRONG!!!!
Yanking my dick out of her mouth I throw her to the ground and shove it in to her gaping freshly fisted ass.
"OH BIG ASS SPORK!! Fuck my ass, fuck my ass good. DEEPER, my stallion, deeper!! Make a Beowulf cluster of sperm on my back!!"
Actually, I agree with your.signature. As boobies go, I love the larger ones. I am moved to poetry!
Titties, titties, titties
How I love to squeeze you
Pinch and suck you
With a lick, cleavage touches dick
Fuck, fuck, fucking
Those muy grande tatas (shouts to la raza!)
---
BAS
Re:Perl & Widening <--RIGHT!!!
on
Perl & XML
·
· Score: -1
Klerck! Long time no read...
Those DMCA violating AC's are stealing the page widening post!
Because it has an integrated text editor, and it is part of my full installation of Office XP Premium Developer (from MSDN Univeral subscription, I have everything MS makes, fuck the GNU hippies!). I know about opening websites in folder view in explorer, but that would make me have to right click on an HTML/PHP/ASP file and choose open with and click on notepad. Frontpage works fine as a text editor, though on my FTP enabled websites, UltraEdit kicks much ass.
I concur. That website is gawd aweful. BTW, I also agree with the notepad thang. WYSIWYG editors just plain suck. I feel a definate loss of control. The only thing I occasionaly use frontpage for is my web account on my ISP. They don't have FTP and their online pagebuilder sucks ass. I use frontpage as an FTP substitute, and keep it in HTML view. My sites are made with a combination of UltraEdit, vi, and Visual Interdev (no runtime controls, thank you very much!).
I also feel that for in-house www projects (intranets) where you control all of the clients, it is alright to code for IE. If Bob in accounting calls up and complains, "The intranet does not look right in Mozilla!" You can respond, "Mozilla is unauthorized software in this organization. Didn't you read the corporate computer policy you signed? You will be written up. The tech is on his way to uninstall it."
Lookin back through the years I saw my anger There was things that I could not control Wandrin through my memories with my darlin Now I fall through the door on my own
On my own again, All alone again Now I see what its like when your away On my own again, All alone again Now I see what its like when your away
~Spoken~ He was man walkin big and proud And he was walkin through a mighty thick crowd Although we never could understand Where that man had been as time grew on He grew weak and thin As the days rolled on through the night He started drinkin so much he was losin his mind And as he sits back he knows that He'll die alone ~Spoken~
On my own again, All alone again Now I see what its like when your away On my own again, All alone again Now I see what its like when your away
I'm on a honky tonk merry-go-round, Makin ever spot in town, Startin out early, comin home late, Ever night with a brand-new date! I'm on a honky tonk merry-go-round, Actin like a foolish clown, Still racin those blues that you left with me, Wonderin if I'll ever be free. Round and around and around I go, Ridin high and feelin low, Round and around just like a top, Well, I'm a-gettin dizzy, but I can't stop! I'm on a honky tonk merry-go-round, Actin like a foolish clown, Still racin those blues that you left with me, Wonderin if I'll ever be free. Round and around and around I go, Ridin high and feelin low, Round and around just like a top, Well, I'm a-gettin dizzy, but I can't stop! I'm on a honky tonk merry-go-round, Actin like a foolish clown, Still racin those blues that you left with me, Wonderin if I'll ever be free, Yes, I'm wonderin if I'll ever be free!
Bummed about the fucking lameness filter!!! Fucked up my use of UAG, ahh well, had to happen eventually. Explicit definition of another shading character might still pass... Must investigate.
Other than that just gearing up for three concerts I already have tickets to:
That does sound nice and balanced. I wish to learn more. I want to subscribe to your newsletter. Please send me any other information you think is usefull. The email addy listed above is real.
Now My Heart Is Full There's gonna be some trouble a whole house will need re-building and everyone I love in the house will recline on an analyst's couch quite soon your Father cracks a joke and in the usual way empties the room tell all the friends (I don't have too many just some rain-coated lovers' brothers) Dallow, Spicer, Pinkie, Cubitt rush to danger wind up nowhere Patric Doonan - raised to wait TIRED again - TRIED again, and now my heart is full now my heart is full and I just can't explain SO I WON'T EVEN TRY TO Dallow, Spicer, Pinkie, Cubitt every jammy Stressford poet loafing oafs in all-night chemists loafing oafs in all-night chemists underact - express depression ah, but Bunnie I loved you I was tired again I tried again, and now my heart is full now my heart is full and I just can't explain SO I WON'T EVEN TRY TO
I was once devoid of will
Wished and longed to kill
Went outside, walked 'round
Everywhere morons with fullfilled lives
Die die die die die
Mother fuckers fear me
Subconscience level, not knowing why
Die die die die die
Ramming my cock into a purile small man
*SLASH
Now a firm suculent young girl
*SLASH*
Fuck The World
For you, my friend, I will post my first Goatse.cx man ASCII art. My first...* g o a t s e x * g o a t s e x * g o a t s e x *
g g
o / \ \ / \ o
a \ a
t `. : t
s` \ s
e \ / / \\\ -- \\ : e
x \ \/ --~~ ~-- \ x
* \ \-~ ~-\ *
g \ \.--------.___\ g
o \ \// ((> \ o
a \ . C ) ((> / a
t/\ C )/ \ (> / t
s //\ C) (> / \ s
e ( C__)\___/// _/ / \ e
x \ \\// (/ x
* \ \) `---- --' *
g \ \ / / g
o / \ o
a / \ \ a
t / / \ t
s / / \/\/ s
e / e
x x
* g o a t s e x * g o a t s e x * g o a t s e x *
Slashdot Mirror
Send In The Clowns
Isn't it rich, are we a pair?
Me here at last on the ground, you in mid air!
Send in the clowns!
Isn't it bliss, don't you approve?
One who keeps tearing around,
one who can't move!
Where are the clowns?
Send in the clowns!
Just when I stopped, opening doors
finally knowin' the one that I wanted was yours,
making my entrance again, with my usual flair
sure of my lines, but no one is there!
Don't you love farce?
My fault I fear!
I thought that you'd want what I want
I'm sorry my dear!
Quick, send in the clowns . . .
Don't bother . . . they're here!
Isn't it rich, isn't it queer?
Losing my timing this late in my career!
Where are the clowns? There's gotta be clowns!
Maybe next year.
. . . maybe next year!
How I love to squeeze you
Pinch and suck you
With a lick, cleavage touches dick
Fuck, fuck, fucking
Those muy grande tatas (shouts to la raza!)
You win, dude. Keep posting Mr. Goaty, and enjoy this special tribute to Big Ass Spork!!!
I DO IT WRONG!, adapted for the stage by YourMissionForToday. Originally written by Big Ass Spork.
INT. COFFEE HOUSE-NIGHT.
A BEATNIK stands pensively on stage in a smoky coffee house. A WHALIN' SAX and COO-COO BONGOS begin to play, followed by some WAY-HIP VIBES (xylophone).
The Beatnik flicks his cigarette as the sax and vibes trail off, leaving only the bongos.
The Beatnik pauses to light another cigarette.
A DANCER dressed as Queen Amidala approaches the stage. She carries a bucket of hot grits in one hand, and huge rubber penis in the other. Beatnik takes the penis, bends her over and pantomimes rough anal sex.
YODA appears from offstage, carrying a huge green rubber penis. After a brief fight, Yoda impales the Beatnik with his penis, and he dies a messy death covered in blood, spunk, and hot grits.
Afterwards, the cast gets up and takes a bow.
You hit submit without proof reading your post (should have paid attention: Use the Preview Button!). I have decided to correct your post, see it below.
My dick is ENORMOUSLY tiny.
Thank you.
Anonymous Coward
Truly.
---
BAS
PS - Can you mod the appearance of replies to articles, or only journal entries?
Actually you post at 0 at -4 thru 0 karma, post at -1 from -5 karma and down. I am at -6 right now, you have to be a real peckerwood to mod down a known troll/crapflooder who already posts at -1...
I do it wrong
Laying here in the shadows of my room, I squint up at my love. My Ms. Portman. I am sore and tired after fucking her for eight solid hours. My chapped and aching dick is soaking in grits to relieve the pain. She gets on her knees and starts lapping the grits up out of the bowl. She places her beautiful hands on my penis and starts to lick the grits off my achy piece.
Massaging my nutsack she....
WAIT, I DO IT WRONG!!!!
Yanking my dick out of her mouth I throw her to the ground and shove it in to her gaping freshly fisted ass.
"OH BIG ASS SPORK!! Fuck my ass, fuck my ass good. DEEPER, my stallion, deeper!! Make a Beowulf cluster of sperm on my back!!"
"Imagine a Beowulf cluster of this baby!"
I DO IT WRONG!!!!
Titties, titties, titties
How I love to squeeze you
Pinch and suck you
With a lick, cleavage touches dick
Fuck, fuck, fucking
Those muy grande tatas (shouts to la raza!)
---
BAS
Those DMCA violating AC's are stealing the page widening post!
Because it has an integrated text editor, and it is part of my full installation of Office XP Premium Developer (from MSDN Univeral subscription, I have everything MS makes, fuck the GNU hippies!). I know about opening websites in folder view in explorer, but that would make me have to right click on an HTML/PHP/ASP file and choose open with and click on notepad. Frontpage works fine as a text editor, though on my FTP enabled websites, UltraEdit kicks much ass.
I also feel that for in-house www projects (intranets) where you control all of the clients, it is alright to code for IE. If Bob in accounting calls up and complains, "The intranet does not look right in Mozilla!" You can respond, "Mozilla is unauthorized software in this organization. Didn't you read the corporate computer policy you signed? You will be written up. The tech is on his way to uninstall it."
[n/t]
Second Stones song in a day? I am going to see them on Feb. 1, 2003 in Denver. Fucking $150 a seat + convieniance charge. Death to Ticketmaster!!!
I thought it was:
Linux Use = Love of the cock
---
BAS
ON MY OWN
Lookin back through the years I saw my anger
There was things that I could not control
Wandrin through my memories with my darlin
Now I fall through the door on my own
On my own again, All alone again
Now I see what its like when your away
On my own again, All alone again
Now I see what its like when your away
~Spoken~
He was man walkin big and proud
And he was walkin through a mighty thick crowd
Although we never could understand
Where that man had been as time grew on
He grew weak and thin
As the days rolled on through the night
He started drinkin so much he was losin his mind
And as he sits back he knows that
He'll die alone
~Spoken~
On my own again, All alone again
Now I see what its like when your away
On my own again, All alone again
Now I see what its like when your away
I'm on a honky tonk merry-go-round,
Makin ever spot in town,
Startin out early, comin home late,
Ever night with a brand-new date!
I'm on a honky tonk merry-go-round,
Actin like a foolish clown,
Still racin those blues that you left with me,
Wonderin if I'll ever be free.
Round and around and around I go,
Ridin high and feelin low,
Round and around just like a top,
Well, I'm a-gettin dizzy, but I can't stop!
I'm on a honky tonk merry-go-round,
Actin like a foolish clown,
Still racin those blues that you left with me,
Wonderin if I'll ever be free.
Round and around and around I go,
Ridin high and feelin low,
Round and around just like a top,
Well, I'm a-gettin dizzy, but I can't stop!
I'm on a honky tonk merry-go-round,
Actin like a foolish clown,
Still racin those blues that you left with me,
Wonderin if I'll ever be free,
Yes, I'm wonderin if I'll ever be free!
Other than that just gearing up for three concerts I already have tickets to:
- Tawmahawk/Tool (El Paso 7/17/02)
- Morrissey (El Paso 8/6/02)
- Rolling Stones (Denver 2/1/03)
All are surely gonna kick ass!---
BAS
---
BAS
Now My Heart Is Full
There's gonna be some trouble
a whole house will need re-building
and everyone I love in the house
will recline on an analyst's couch quite soon
your Father cracks a joke
and in the usual way
empties the room
tell all the friends
(I don't have too many
just some rain-coated lovers' brothers)
Dallow, Spicer, Pinkie, Cubitt
rush to danger
wind up nowhere
Patric Doonan - raised to wait
TIRED again - TRIED again, and
now my heart is full
now my heart is full
and I just can't explain
SO I WON'T EVEN TRY TO
Dallow, Spicer, Pinkie, Cubitt
every jammy Stressford poet
loafing oafs in all-night chemists
loafing oafs in all-night chemists
underact - express depression
ah, but Bunnie I loved you
I was tired again
I tried again, and
now my heart is full
now my heart is full
and I just can't explain
SO I WON'T EVEN TRY TO
Wished and longed to kill
Went outside, walked 'round
Everywhere morons with fullfilled lives
Die die die die die
Mother fuckers fear me
Subconscience level, not knowing why
Die die die die die
Ramming my cock into a purile small man
*SLASH
Now a firm suculent young girl
*SLASH*
Fuck The World
---
BAS
[i agree with this agreement of the previous post]
I knew I made you a foe for a reason.
---
BAS
 
Great way to get to -5 so you can troll with impunity...
1234567890zxcvbnm 2nd Post! absurd_spork Adolf Hitroll Al Gore Alan_Thicke Allah_Spork anal-johnson Anonymous Cowrad Anonymous Pancake anthrax_spork Anti-Spork ArchieBunker Ars-Fartsica ascii ascii spork Ashley Olsen autopr0n badl BankofAmerica_ATM Big Dogs Cock bitchslapboy Bob Abooey BSD is dying buttfucker2000 Captain Peacock Carp Flounderson cavemanf16 Chinese Karma Whore Clint Trollwood CLIT CmderTaco CmdrTaco on CmdrTaco on Saturday cmdr_shithead Commander Spork Commienst coolcast corniche CrabCakeJimmy2k Crapflooder cyborg_gorilla cyborg_monkey dadaist Dead Fart Warrior dead_puppy Dick Veiney Discount_Ninja_Troll DivineOb DonkeyHote Dr. Spork E1vis ebcdic spork egg troll ekrout evil_spork Fecal Troll Matter flikx ForeignLanguageTroll FortKnox Frank White Fucky the troll GaylordFucker Genghis Troll George W. Bush Spork George WIPO Bush GhostseTroll goatse.cx guy GoatTroll Guns n' Roses Troll handybundler Happy Fun Spork herbert_axelrod hettb Hillary Clinton I have nutsack I.H.S.W.R.K. I.T.R.A.R.K. IAgreeWithThisPost indifferent spork j0nkatz jazzydnb Jebus_the_spork Jim42688 Jon Coktoastone Jon Katz on Tuesday Juan Epstein Jucius Maximus Karl Cocknozzle kilgore_47 KingAzzy Kingfox king_spork Kiss The Sp0rk kitts kiwipeso Klerck KlomDark L.Torvalds l33t j03 Labandion lb-spork limpdawg LinuxIsForAssholes LordOfYourPants LOTR Troll Lover'sArrival,spork Lunastorm LunchLady Mary-Kate Olsen Metrollica Mighty-Troll Migor MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM Mode0x13 motherfuckin_spork Mr Thinly Sliced Mr. Spork NaveWeiss neal n bob Necro Spork negativekarmanow tm New Movie Troll Niggah_Spork No More Trolls NoMoreNicksLeft nurightshu October_30th on by OnceAnd_Future_Spork Openly Gay Troll Original AIDS Monkey Ozzy Osbourne Penile Troll perdida Pig Hogger pig testicle PimpNasty pornstar-spork PowerTroll 5000 Pr0n K1ng Profane Motherfucker propstoalldeadhomiez Pussy Is Money Ralph JewHater Nader real_b0fh Redundant Spork Reikk Retarded_One returnofthe_spork ringbarer ronc_LAemigre Roto-Rooter Man Sarcasm_Orgasm Serial Troller Sexual Asspussy SIGFPE Signal 11 slashb0t SlaveTroll sllort SmellMyTeenSpirit sp0rk- Spootnik spork spork 0YavrAD2 spork ar0onORN Spork Detritus Spork Lord Spork Terminator spork yF3Beit2 spork! spork! spork! spork, never trolled Spork, The Spork-O sporktoast spork_and_mindy spork_testicle StandardDeviant Subject Line Troll sucko Sunda666 Sunken Kursk Super Mario Troll SweetAndSourJesus swordboy Taco_spork Tasty Beef Jerky TechnoLust The BOFH Troll The Lyrics Guy The Pimp The Turd Report The WIPO Troll TheDullSpork Troll4Jesus TRoLLaXoR TrollBack trollercoaster Trolligula Trollistic MD TrollMan 5000 ubertroll Usama bin Laden Vladinator Voyager Sucks Ass Wakko Warner WeatherTroll Whistler's Mother YourMissionForToday Your_Mom
For you, my friend, I will post my first Goatse.cx man ASCII art. My first...* g o a t s e x * g o a t s e x * g o a t s e x * g g o / \ \ / \ o a \ a t `. : t s` \ s e \ / / \\\ -- \\ : e x \ \/ --~~ ~-- \ x * \ \-~ ~-\ * g \ \ .--------.___\ g
o \ \// ((> \ o
a \ . C ) ((> / a
t /\ C )/ \ (> / t
s / /\ C) (> / \ s
e ( C__)\___/ // _/ / \ e
x \ \\// (/ x
* \ \) `---- --' *
g \ \ / / g
o / \ o
a / \ \ a
t / / \ t
s / / \/\/ s
e / e
x x
* g o a t s e x * g o a t s e x * g o a t s e x *