Slashdot Mirror

http://www.theonion.com/content/video/voting_machines_elect_one_of

True, but the *likelihood* that this molecule does those things is quite small. The "we can connect our discovery to anything" approach that is occurring in some of the neuroscience areas could easily become a "boy who cried wolf" scenario. I can't think of how many articles I read recently where, someone is like "we've got XYZ solved!!" only to never hear anything about that research again.

The bottom line is that too many news stories lead the public to believe that we are way further ahead than we are on solving certain issues, or that we have a breakthrough when as you correctly pointed out, we have only maybe found another piece of the puzzle.

I mean, even the onion has started making jokes about this sort of thing: http://www.theonion.com/content/news/son_of_a_bitch_mouse_solves_maze

Jesus did not create halloween, and you must not anger the halloween spirits, or this will happen: http://www.theonion.com/content/video/in_the_know_has_halloween_become

The election results are already known

the "i don't own a tv and i have to tell everyone about it" guy

in answer to your question: who cares? why do you feel the need to tell everyone you don't own a tv? that's the real subtext of your question

and if you think that's a smarmy answer, well then i have a real answer for you: GO BUY A TV. GET CABLE OR SATELLITE. END OF STORY. your brain will not melt, you will not be contributing to the downfall of western civilization. really. or, go ahead and listen to the various unnecessary technical gymanstics you must perform offered in this thead. instead of simply going and getting yourself a simple, harmless television

the onion was prescient: Area Man Constantly Mentioning He Doesn't Own A Television

this is some sort of genuine subculture. and if not owning a television turns one into a vainglorious buffoon, then please, everyone should own a television, for the sake of a healthy sense of humility. sheesh

I did not know that Denmark had been accepted as a new state in USA
Norway has already been annexed. It was only a matter of time before Denmark followed.

It's ok, the spoilers were already announced:

http://www.theonion.com/content/video/diebold_accidentally_leaks

BUT its lots of fun, everyone throw in their own numbers that have some personal truthyness to them and see what you got. I get around 43,012

That reminds me of this article from the Onion.

'"My personal savior is Batman," said Beverly Hills plastic surgeon Greg Jurgenson. "My wife chooses to follow the teachings of the Gilmore Girls. Of course, we are still beginners. Some advanced-level Fictionologists have total knowledge of every lifetime they have ever lived for the last 80 trillion years."

"Sure, it's total bullshit," Jurgenson added. "But that's Fictionology. Praise Batman!"'

Doesn't he realize he can virtualize his 36 accounts and 11 computers into a single WoWoW account.

The Onion

"For those of us that no longer have a television"

http://www.theonion.com/content/node/28694

to Area man posts front page Slashdot story telling people he doesn't own a television.

I think the Onion already reported on vote manipulation.

Drug Czar Toppled By Drug Bolsheviks

its been known for a while
    http://www.theonion.com/content/node/29523

...may revolutionize the way we drive!
http://www.theonion.com/content/node/30431

Is this a variation of the famous "Area Man Constantly Mentions Not Owning a TV" Onion phenomenon?

http://www.theonion.com/content/node/28694

If it makes you feel better, I sometimes try to do things without driving, only to realize it's pretty much impossible (at least where I live.) The choice is usually "drive for 20 minutes", or "ride bus for 45 minutes, wait 15 minutes for second bus, ride that bus for 20 minutes." I opt for the former.

The Chevy Tantrum

http://www.theonion.com/content/node/30431

That's the old model, the new one is actually much much angrier. Full story here, another perfect example of the onion calling it years before the real world caught up to the news.

That's the old model, the new one is actually much much angrier. Full story here, another perfect example of the onion calling it years before the real world caught up to the news.

If you're asking whether I personally am impressed by someone bragging about how he refuses to use Facebook or GMail: it impresses me about as much as someone who brags about not having heard of some television show.

In fact, the entire submission reads like a pastiche of Area Man Constantly Mentioning He Doesn't Own A Television. I understand wanting to protect your privacy, but this guy really does seem to treasure the fact that he is clueless about Facebook etc. Whenever I've ever heard anybody say anything like "their Facebook 'wall' (whatever that is), it's always been with a condescending "I'm too good for crap like that" tone. This guy doesn't want privacy, he wants to feel better than everybody else.

It still doesn't stop the uninformed from spending billions on tracking associations anyway. Oh, have an obligatory Onion link

To use the usual Republican criminality logic, Clinton did the same thing so it's OK:

Clinton Declares Self President for Life

reminds me of this:

In The Know: Is The Government Spying On Paranoid Schizophrenics Enough?
http://www.theonion.com/content/video/in_the_know_is_the_government

I read this a long time ago:

http://www.theonion.com/content/node/28589

and found it funny, but after some reflection, thought maybe it was a contributing factor. People hate inconvenience.

even this?

Exactly. Gravity is just an unproven theory. Intelligent Falling is clearly to blame.

The onion did a piece on "World of World of Warcraft", where players play a character sitting in a lonely basement playing warcraft. The "your avatar is an avatar" part reminds me of that, though technically they imply different things... and actually that statement doesn't imply much...

http://www.theonion.com/content/video/warcraft_sequel_lets_gamers_play

-Taylor

World of Warcraft - A game so fun that people pay for programs to play it for them.

You're telling me! I can't wait for World of World of Warcraft to come out! I'm going to roll a 90 lb famished Chinese man working for pennies an hour!

Ever since Microsoft patented ones and zeros, formatting them is much harder...

How would you help break the deadlock on the Get Up/Get Down issue?

This might be a farce but how close to reality is it? http://www.theonion.com/content/video/diebold_accidentally_leaks

Diebold Accidentally Leaks Results Of 2008 Election Early

I always link to this onion "story" when I see such a comment :

Area Man Constantly Mentioning He Doesn't Own A Television

yeah obama uses gmail I know who im coting for!

Area Man? Is that you?
http://www.theonion.com/content/node/28694

fter all this time, I still hold a small, bitter place in my heart for that mental prison.

Agreed. This Onion piece resonated with me:

6-Year-Old Stares Down Bottomless Abyss Of Formal Schooling

As a conservative with strong libertarian leanings, I agree that compulsory education has some serious problems. But an uneducated populace is expensive as well. Promise me I won't have to pay more for those dumbass dropouts (prison, welfare, low wage redistribution, and other pathologies) than for their education, and I'd agree.

I'm not sure if increasing the current dropout rate would actually create a better society. Just as the idea of drug legalization has some merit, the actual practice in Nanny America might just lead to government-funded drug treatment, if not drug subsidies. I can see it now, Obamacare paying for medical marijuana with my tax dollars. But I digress. High school dropouts are expensive. If I could bury them with nuclear waste, great. But I doubt that would past constitutional muster either.

It's a bit out of topic, but I have to link to The Onion for this.

Oh--right.

Maybe it would just be easier to bribe Diebold more than whoever is holding their leash now? Saves all that pesky trouble of actually fixing the problem.

Too bad diebold already leaked the results early:
http://www.theonion.com/content/video/diebold_accidentally_leaks

Today, The Onion provided a glimpse into the GMail Inbox of the other major candidate.

They've done it for warcraft. ;)

Did Intel partner with Gillette on this CPU? http://www.theonion.com/content/node/33930

Busy dealing with important paperwork and other vice presidential duties in recent weeks, Dick Cheney was forced to put off until the last minute a cherished annual tradition: gift-shopping for his favorite holiday, 9/11.

http://www.theonion.com/content/news/cheney_waits_until_last_minute

Holy linkfail, batman!

Here's the fixed link: http://www.theonion.com/content/node/39073

UM, I think you neglected to mention that Evolution is also just a theory at this point.

Yeah, you might want to mention that part when you advocate suppressing alternative beliefs in the classroom...

Like the "theory of gravity"?

http://www.theonion.com/content/node/39512

The onion had a relevant article to this topic this week.

The Plumbing Business Is Not As Glamorous As The Porn Industry Depicts

I'm sure someone here was thinking this:

And all too easily sometimes! The smaller market store didn't do any sort of drug-testing, so there were a large number of burnouts (think Jim Anchower) and the occasional meth-head.

I have been excited to see that my current store (in the DC area) actually carries VPN and gigabit stuff, something wholly unavailable in the quiet mountain town I formerly called home.