Slashdot Mirror

by ASSOCIATED PRESS

VA Software (LNUX) CEO, president and founder Larry Augustin was found dead in his home in Fremont, Calif. early this morning. The death was an apparent suicide, caused by a close-range shotgun blast to the face and head. He was 39 years old.

Police reports indicate that strewn about the room in which Augustin carried out his fate were empty cartons of ramen noodles and discount bulk oat bags. His house was bare of any furniture or furnishings of any worth, and his garage which once held several classic cars was emptied.

An autopsy revealed several thousand VA Software stock certificates, neatly rolled and bundled, in Augustin's rectum. Police are investigating how the five-inch-wide bundle appeared in Augustin's lower intestine unlubricated without any sign of strain on his anal sphincter. Also discovered was an abnormally high concentration of dye in Augustin's bloodstream, which was determined to be the main component of "ledger red" ink.

VA Software, which at different times has been called VA Linux Systems, VA Linux and VA Systems, has seen financial difficulties of late. Most likely to be soon delisted from NASDAQ, the company shares a struggle for profitability with many other dot-bomb era corporations whose business plans include the line "???" directly before "PROFIT !!". VA Software child companies, such as geek weblog Slashdot.org and Star Wars fan site Sourceforge have felt the pinch of the economic downturn.

Augustin is survived by his domestic partner and two adopted children.

by ASSOCIATED PRESS

VA Software (LNUX) CEO, president and founder Larry Augustin was found dead in his home in Fremont, Calif. early this morning. The death was an apparent suicide, caused by a close-range shotgun blast to the face and head. He was 39 years old.

Police reports indicate that strewn about the room in which Augustin carried out his fate were empty cartons of ramen noodles and discount bulk oat bags. His house was bare of any furniture or furnishings of any worth, and his garage which once held several classic cars was emptied.

An autopsy revealed several thousand VA Software stock certificates, neatly rolled and bundled, in Augustin's rectum. Police are investigating how the five-inch-wide bundle appeared in Augustin's lower intestine unlubricated without any sign of strain on his anal sphincter. Also discovered was an abnormally high concentration of dye in Augustin's bloodstream, which was determined to be the main component of "ledger red" ink.

VA Software, which at different times has been called VA Linux Systems, VA Linux and VA Systems, has seen financial difficulties of late. Most likely to be soon delisted from NASDAQ, the company shares a struggle for profitability with many other dot-bomb era corporations whose business plans include the line "???" directly before "PROFIT !!". VA Software child companies, such as geek weblog Slashdot.org and Star Wars fan site Sourceforge have felt the pinch of the economic downturn.

Augustin is survived by his domestic partner and two adopted children.

Can't think of any genius reason why a person would need this when you can just sift through pages and pages of legalese to find out the same thing. I feel bad for these folks because they'll approve (or not, but either way they're eating their lives away studying (and debating) bleeping license legalese!) any license that's thrown at them.
Worse yet, licenses change and components can be closed sourced (right, Source Forge?) so I don't see much but big bad headaches for these folks in return for something that really doesn't add much to the community. So it goes.

http://www.vasoftware.com/company/management/jenab .php

BEGIN RANT

Look Jon, rather than sitting there and counting down to the Delisting of LNUX from NASDAQ, why not do something about
it. I mean, why not got out and buy some stock in VA?
Now is the time to put your money where your mouth is and invest in this company. You can trade in LNUX stock right now for only $0.82.
Unless you cannot even spend a buck to save the company. BTW That is lees than that Fat Ass Sally Struthers begs for to feed the children.
Exactly! VA is down to only 205 employees, and planning to cut more jobs before the end of this quarter.Understand?

So, what is it going to be? Are you going to support this company and invest. Shit, look at the ads on the OSDN network. 90% of them
understandably promote other OSDN sites. We need to get those big pocket investors in here to buy adspace.
Contact the VA National Sales Director Eric Kazanjian eric.kazanjian@osdn.com, Voice: 650-551-0175, Fax: 650-551-0195, Mr.
Kazanjian can also be mailed at eric.kazanjian@osdn.com. Call and see what you can do, buy a banner stating YOU HELPED!
So, in conclusion :o), Another 2 cheeseburgers at Burger King, or supporting a great company? You Cockeater.

END RANT

Mod me down as Off topic but I needed to clear that up!

Microsoft stock is worth less than 50% of its value about 2 years ago so it doesn't seem to be working anyway.

and linux is worth like 0.005% of its value about 2 years ago, so that just proves that linux sucks!

Of course he earned his salary. By making a better and better product, his shares in redhat, VALinux will go through the top of the toilet seat. Conversely the shares of Micro$oft will decline horribly, effectively crippling his mortal enemy in Bill Gates;robbing him of over $3000 USD. This is known a nero sum game, where the more you win the more other people lose; named after the Roman Emperor Nero who sang to his death when Rome burned to the ground.

When you have a crime to investigate, and you have no suspects, where do you start? Obviously you begin by looking at the person or persons who have the most to gain by perpetrating the crime.

This is why we must consider: who had something to gain from the disasterous crimes of September 11th? Obviously not Osama Bin Laden, who would net no financial windfall from the destruction of the World Trade Center and the Pentagon. Although he has loudly applauded the "terrorist" acts of September 11th and even tacitly taken credit for them, there is no reason to believe that he is anything more than a bandwagon jumper. Being blamed for the destruction of the World Trade Center has done more for his image than any amount of militant Islamic rhetoric.

But if not Bin Laden, then who?

It so happens that on December 11th, "coincidentally" 2 months after the tragedy, Credit Suisse First Boston quietly agreed to pay out US$100 million in order to settle an 18 month old investigation into its handling of certain high-profile technology IPOs (Initial Public Offerings). One of the most controversial amongst these being the IPO of VA Linux Systems, Inc. (LNUX) .

VA Linux Systems, Inc., now known as VA Software, is widely derided as a poster child of the dot-com bust, though inexplicably still in business. At the time of the IPO, VA Linux (Software) shares opened trading at nearly 10 times their $30 offer price, closing the first day of trading at $239.25. This meteoric rise made many early investors rich, strangely on account of a company which purports to sell a hobbyist operating system which can be obtained for free on the Internet. "The It was then that Eric S. Raymond suggested something he had read in a book by Tom Clancy. Crashing two planes into the World Trade Center Plaza would guarantee the destruction of the SEC offices, killing the operatives and possibly a number of SEC investigators at the same time. The plan seemed flawless, and would cost little more than the price of a few plane tickets. In a secret session, the board voted unanimously in favour of Eric's suggestion, and began to put it into action.

VA Software/Linux, at the time of planning the attacks, had no shortage of H1-B visa workers, who they employed for the purpose of writing and improving hacking, encryption, and other terrorist tools for the Linux operating system. It had been decided that a hand-picked few of these foreign H1-B workers would be used as the "patsies" in the operation. A contest was held, and the most zealotous Linux advocates were chosen for this secret assignment, direct from the board of directors. They accepted their mission after being told that, if successful, it would guarantee the adoption of Linux in the desktop market.

Alan Cox was brought into the fold to provide some planning and logistics for the mission. It was he who determined that since there was no adequate flight simulator software for Linux, the patsies would need to train at a flight school in order to pull off the plan successfully. It was also his idea to hijack a third and fourth plane for the purpose of crashing them into Washington D.C., to express his extreme rage over the DMCA, or Digital Millenium Copyright Act. The board of directors agreed with this addition to the plan in the hopes that it would help divert attention from the purpose of the WTC attack.

The H1-B workers were given false identities by using Linux hacking tools. Once they had attended the necessary flight training, they stayed at the Massachusetts home of Richard M. Stallman for a brief "faith building" retreat. During this time spent at the house of Stallman, between the nauseating stench of patchouli, Stallman's incessant, pitiful recorder playing, and Stallman's droning seminars on the grammatical and syntactical accuracy of various statements by Microsoft representatives, the H1-B workers were effectively hypnotized to the point that they were ready to lay down their lives for Free Software. It was then that they departed for Boston's Logan International Airport to board the planes.

(The preceding inside information has been obtained from a credible source close to the VA Linux/Software Board of Directors. He/she is in hiding for obvious reasons in light of this damning evidence, but has presented hard, physical evidence of VA Software/Linux's complicity in the events of 9/11 to federal investigators.)

Technology has become a primary asset in your organization, and software is at the core. Those who leverage software to respond to rapidly changing market demands will thrive, while those who don't may perish. SourceForge Enterprise Edition provides the flexibility and clarity needed in this day and age of Enterprise Application Integration (EAI) and co-development with strategic partners.

SourceForge facilitates agile software development, which in turn promotes creative collaboration and brings cross-team development projects to fruition, faster. The cost of software is based on developer efficiencies; therefore, reducing the time it takes to complete a project is key.

Managers and developers waste valuable time in meetings and teleconferences to coordinate their development activities. SourceForge addresses this issue by automating the collection of data and centralizing communication. With SourceForge, it's easier for developers to hand-off code to other team members, while managers have the necessary tools to make proactive decisions.

SourceForge provides the edge you need to stay two steps ahead. You will gain a more comprehensive and accurate vantagepoint of all cross-enterprise activities. With enhanced clarity, your organization has the ability to produce quality software in an efficient manner, while reducing excessive administrative overhead, unnecessary spending and duplicated efforts.

SourceForge is the leading collaborative software development (CSD) platform used by more than 400,000 developers worldwide.

VA Software provides SourceForge as an enterprise software product that integrates the essential tools for building applications. SourceForge enables companies to develop better software faster by bringing together the critical information and resources they need to collaborate more effectively across different locations, teams and participants.

By integrating tools for software developers, development managers and executives, SourceForge helps companies become more responsive -- and better leverage existing resources -- while reducing costs.

Learn how SourceForge and CSD are transforming innovation in the enterprise.

VA Software's flagship product, SourceForge Enterprise Edition, provides IT and engineering organizations with web-based tools that enable developers to collaborate, managers to monitor projects, and executives to obtain critical information on demand. Designed for installation behind customer's firewalls, SourceForge has the capacity to support development teams from 30 to upwards of 20,000 users across different locations, groups and participants. By enabling collaborative software development, SourceForge Enterprise Edition helps organizations become more responsive -- and better leverage existing resources -- while reducing costs.

Hey, I thought the company was called VA Software...

Now's your chance to see just how well you've been paying attention during the past four years of chips, dips, Micro$loth, Napster, IPOs, BSD, rights online, editor censorship, and of course Linux, Linux, Linux! Complete the following professional-quality crossword puzzle chock full of trivia on Slashdot, Open Source, and geekiness in general for not only posterity but GREAT PRIZES!! Prizes include the following:

A fresh box of QUAKER GRITS !
Your very own SLASHDOT CRUISER !
A hot date with NATALIE PORTMAN !
A genuine VA Lin^H^H^HSOFTWARE STOCK CERTIFICATE !

It doesn't get much better than this, folks! Here's how to play:

Fill in the crossword completely. No incomplete (or incorrect) solutions will be considered.
Once you're sure you have the crossword completely figured out, submit it to slashdot_crossword at engineer.com. If you indeed have the solution, one of the above four prizes are yours! The prizes are in limited supply (well, except for the VA stock certificates), so get those solutions in early!
The winners will be announced on 2002/04/28, to be praised in -1 crapfloods for all eternity (or at least until the crapflooders get bored and go back to posting gay Slashdot editor fanfics).

While we fully assert that this crossword is professional quality, there are of course some variations from the standard crossword form to make things more interesting for the Slashdot crowd. Some answers are used more than once. Digits (0-9) exist in some answers. Some clues are repeated with different answers. Many of the answers are acronyms or initialisms; if the answer that comes to mind doesn't fit, try thinking of common abbreviations for it. And, of course, the crossword indices are all in hexadecimal (this is Slashdot, after all!)

So, without further ado, here comes the crossword! Plain HTML is admittedly ugly and unpleasant to look at, so you may download and print a nice PDF version here. Good luck!

+-+- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +-+- +
|1 |2 |3 |4 |##|5 |6 |##|7 | |8 |##|9 |##|0a| |0b|0c|##|0d|
+-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+-+- +- +- +- +-+- +- +-+- +
|0e| | | |##|0f| |10| |##| |##|11| | |##|12| |13| |
+-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +- +-+-+- +- +- + +- +- +-+- +
| |##|##| |##|14| | | |##|15|16| |##| |##|17| | | |
+- +- - +- +- +-+-+- +- +- +- - +- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +
|##|18| | |19|##|##|1a| |1b| | |##|##|##|1c|####|##| |
+- +- +-+- +- +- +- - +- +- +- +-+-+- +- +- +- +- +-+- +
|1d| |##|##| |##|1e| | | |##|1f|20|21|22| |23|##|24|##|
+ +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- - +- +- +-+- +- +-+- +
|##|25|26|27| |##|##| |##|28|29|##|2a| | |##|2b|2c| |##|
+- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +- +-+
|##|2d| | |##|2e|2f|##|##|30| | | |##| |##|31| | |##|
+- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +-+- +
|##|##|##|32| | | |##|##|##| |##|##|33| |34|##| |##|##|
+-+- +- +- +- ++- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- + + +- +- +-+- +
|35|36|37|##|##|38| |39|##|3a|##|##|3b| |##| |##|3c| | |
+-+-+- +- +- ++- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- - +- +- +- + +- +
|3d| | | |3e|##|##|3f| | |##|40|##|##|41| | | |##|##|
+-+- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +-+- +- +- + - +- +- + +-+- +
| |##|##|##|42| |43| |##|44| | |45| | | |##|46|47|48|
+- +- - +- + +- +- +-+- +- +- + +- +- +-+- +- +- +-+- +
|49|4a| | | |##|4b| | | |##|4c| |##| |##|##|4d| | |
+- +- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- + +- +
|##| |##|##| |##| |##|##|4e|4f| |##|50| |51|##|52| | |
+-+- +- + +- +-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- + +- +- + +- +- +
|53| | | | |##| |##|54| | | | |##|55| | |##|##| |
+- +- +-+- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +- + +- +
|56| |##|##|##|57| | |##|##|##| |##|##| |##|##|##|58| |
+- +- +- - +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +
|59| |##|##|##|##| |##|5a| |5b|##|##|5c| |5d|##|5e|##| |
+- +- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- - +- +- +-+- +
| |##|##|5f| |60| |##| |##| |##|61| |##|62|63| | |##|
+- +- +- + +- +- +- +- +- - +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +
|##|64| | |##| |##|65| | | |##|##| |##|66| | |##|##|
+- +-+- +- +- +- - +- +- +- +- +-+-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +
|67| |##|68| | |##|69| |##|6a| | | |##|6b| | | |##|
+- +- +-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- +- +- +-+- +
|6c| | |##|##| |##|6d| | | |##|##|6e| | | | |##|6f|
+-+- +- +- +- +- +-+ +- +- +- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- +-+

THE CLUES:

Across
1. This band must've been desperate for publicity to give an interview to Slashdot!
5. Crapflooder impersonated well by Silicon Simian.
7. A special treat you earn for Bad Posting.
0A. Sean Kelly's ex-lover and former SlashNET IRCop.
0E. Ew! Between the eyes!
0F. This dog won't mess your carpet, shed fur all over the place, or do much else besides consume batteries.
11. Living proof that you get what you pay for.
12. The soundtrack for the World Wide Web.
14. Disney makes money to destroy free speech on the Internet every time you buy ____ on DVD.
15. Slashcode's overglorified killfile.
17. You were writing FOX about "The Tick" when you should've been writing your congressman about this bill.
18. A very Snotty troll.
1A. This young Afghan loves watching movies and JonKatz on his C64.
1D. The best text editor EVER!
1E. What you say!! If you say it one more time, I'll bludgeon you to death!
1F. These guys gave Linux mono.
25. These shiny discs feed money into a bloated media cartel and stifle fair use rights, but you buy them by the millions anyway.
28. Slashdot's top comment poster and story submitter.
2A. These networks "disrupt" artists' cash flows.
2B. Open Source codeword for amphetamines.
2D. RAM type optimized for Extended Data Output on old Pentiums.
2E. Hillary Rosen knows you're just itching to steal Charley Pride's __.
30. A hack to get a kernel designed only to boot off floppy disks to boot off a hard drive.
31. ___ BREAK HEAD WITH OPEN-SOURCE CD!!!
32. Marketers who resort to this tactic are worse than Hitler and should be tortured and killed.
33. This desktop environment kicks GNOME's ass!
35. Microsoft sold off this Unix, and it's gone downhill ever since.
38. An essential e-mail utility for child pornographers and terrorists.
3B. (0A Down)'s lucky number.
3C. It's not Unix, and it shows.
3D. Preface for 90% of Slashdot comments, and 100% of CmdrTaco's personal ads.
3F. Where non-free software goes on your file system.
41. You better mark all the comments as ____ in metamod unless you want to lose karma.
42. This international standards body, no matter what you may think, does NOT read Slashdot.
44. Head bitch of the RIAA.
46. A primitive chat program superseded by AOL Instant Messenger.
49. An online webzine which demonstrated that online subscriptions don't work to everybody except CmdrTaco.
4B. If you moderate in a way CmdrTaco doesn't like, you earn this special database flag.
4C. vi does a poor job of emulating this standard Unix text editor.
4D. To B or not __ _.
4E. You won't get much use out of this text-recognition technology if all you use your scanner for is scanning your ass.
50. The sound Michael's head makes when he's stuffing it up his rectum.
52. Unique index for a whole LIST of babble.
53. The world's best operating system!
54. Father of Methuselah, or old-school Slashdot troll.
55. You don't need to be a Kreskin to predict this operating system's future.
56. Most geeks sleep through this half of the day.
57. This open-source man was Natalie's first.
58. Carly's mission is to steer this company into the ground.
59. mimbleton's favorite subject prefix.
5A. Chewing this might help your babbling problem.
5C. Programming language named after Lord Byron's daughter.
5F. Dead drummer for CmdrTaco's favorite band, or ridiculous Liberal myth.
61. Every Slashdotter's dream is to get one of these.
62. The Firm that is spelling Armageddon for free speech on The Net.
64. These networks are the beginning of Disorganized Crime.
65. Shitty "bitch band" whose leader likes to bitch about the RIAA.
66. The only Adequacy editor with a real PhD.
67. I think 7 over 22 is both backwards AND wrong.
68. Mentioning this droid (and others) is what is keeping you from getting laid.
69. Two-letter country code for Oman.
6A. Giving a ____ Necklace involves "coming" on Heidi Wall's bosom.
6B. What people who can't afford Visual Studio use to search text files.
6C. This hacker tool is often used to replace "characters" in "strings".
6D. QueenTaco's maiden name.
6E. The best text editor EVER!
6F. The PDP-11 assembler that thinks it's a programming language.

Down
1. Taco thinks that a purchase of his publicly traded company's services is a ___.
2. The self-centered Windows 9x release after 98SE.
3. 3D Tamagotchi game designed by Peter Molyneux.
4. A crippled Photoshop wannabe.
5. Lock your penis bird in a cage to protect it from this text-outputting animal.
6. Russian Geeks in Space.
7. If your karma surpasses 25, you have this and a problem.
8. Luckily, michael was born too late to join THIS party.
9. If this Slashdot section's color scheme doesn't drive you away, Michael's snotty editorial remarks will.
0A. Suffering cerebral palsy didn't stop him from becoming Surprised by Wealth.
0B. The market leader in megahertz lies.
0C. Statement used to declare variables in Visual Basic.
0D. Media cartel dedicated to protecting Britney Spears from dirty hackers.
10. Once the greatest Karma Whore ever, now a suicidal loser seen only on (33 Down).
13. Game console that bankrupted its parent company because of hackers making free games for it.
16. The only Unix understandable by non-geeks.
18. (40 Down) likes his pages ____.
19. Do many eyes make all bugs shallow, or do too many cooks spoil the broth?
1C. Research? Linux? Software? Whatever!
20. The first step towards failure for Linux companies.
21. Every Slashdotter's duty (except those marked with (4B Across)).
22. Apple's stylish new IP theft device.
23. (43 Down)'s employer.
24. A flaky Open-Source knockoff of (38 Across).
26. ESR's birthday present to RMS.
27. This primitive operating system denies any service to its users.
29. Unique index for a particular piece of babble.
2C. A tasty breakfast treat -- down your pants!
2E. You hit this once you get 50 karma points.
2F. This marketing guy troll sure is dumb!
33. This site is decidedly not Slashdot.
34. An easy way to lose all your karma is to offer your account for sale on this popular auction site.
35. Unfortunately, this famous online Nazi's treatment of the Censorware Project wasn't just a game.
36. Two-letter country code for the 51st state.
37. A geek's computer is always __.
39. ____, Lover, Aesthete, Programmer. There is no contradiction.
3A. The XP makes it go faster!
3E. The world's worst operating system!
40. The only troll with a freaks list longer than JonKatz'.
41. The OS all the cool people use now that Linux isn't trendy anymore.
43. A top-flight IT consultant who somehow manages to find time in his busy schedule to post to Slashdot.
45. What comes after as(1) and before strip(1) in the C build process.
47. VA Software has the world's worst ___.
48. This Senate bill comes closer to passing every time you go to see Lord of the Rings again.
4A. Legalized child pornography.
4F. What the Greeks went to Delphi for, Geeks go to this state for.
51. The Hellmouth should've eaten you here.
53. This rocker's battle against file-sharing networks won't end until he can Kill 'Em All.
5A. This desktop environment kicks KDE's ass!
5B. This modest and self-effacing troll was one of the first on Slashdot.
5C. You'd have to think different to justify spending money on this company's overpriced products.
5D. A game console which thought it was a full-featured computer system.
5E. Cofounder of Chips 'n' Dips.
5F. It may not have the best sound quality, but at least it's better than Ogg Vorbis.
60. Preface for the 10% of Slashdot comments not prefaced with (3D Across).
63. Apple stole all their ideas from this research group.
64. Bye bye, miss USian ___, drove the Cruiser like some loser who starts posts with a *sigh* ...
65. A dynamically updated list of the biggest losers on Slashdot.
67. Standard programming language implemented by most high-end printers.
6F. This language's lack of bounds checking is responsible for 90% of software security holes out there.

fin

Note: Now that the Great Slashdot Blackout has started, many of you are probably wondering what you can do instead of post relevant comments (remember, no comments from April 21-27!). Well, the answer is to solve this puzzle! Feel free to repost this puzzle as many times as possible so everyone gets a fair chance to play, and if you have moderator points, mod it up so that (again) everyone gets a fair chance to play. The puzzle contest is over when the Slashdot Blackout is over! After the Blackout is over, please, return to your regularly scheduled activities and don't repost the puzzle anymore. Thanks!

Now's your chance to see just how well you've been paying attention during the past four years of chips, dips, Micro$loth, Napster, IPOs, BSD, rights online, editor censorship, and of course Linux, Linux, Linux! Complete the following professional-quality crossword puzzle chock full of trivia on Slashdot, Open Source, and geekiness in general for not only posterity but GREAT PRIZES!! Prizes include the following:

A fresh box of QUAKER GRITS [quakergrits.com] [quakergrits.com]!
Your very own SLASHDOT CRUISER [slashdot.org] [slashdot.org]!
A hot date [ea.com] [ea.com] with NATALIE PORTMAN [natalieportman.com] [natalieportman.com]!
A genuine VA Lin^H^H^HSOFTWARE STOCK CERTIFICATE [vasoftware.com] [vasoftware.com]!

It doesn't get much better than this, folks! Here's how to play:

Fill in the crossword completely. No incomplete (or incorrect) solutions will be considered.
Once you're sure you have the crossword completely figured out, submit it to slashdot_crossword at engineer.com [mailto] [mailto]. If you indeed have the solution, one of the above four prizes are yours! The prizes are in limited supply (well, except for the VA stock certificates), so get those solutions in early!
The winners will be announced on 2002/04/28, to be praised in -1 crapfloods for all eternity (or at least until the crapflooders get bored and go back to posting gay Slashdot editor fanfics).

While we fully assert that this crossword is professional quality, there are of course some variations from the standard crossword form to make things more interesting for the Slashdot crowd. Some answers are used more than once. Digits (0-9) exist in some answers. Some clues are repeated with different answers. Many of the answers are acronyms or initialisms; if the answer that comes to mind doesn't fit, try thinking of common abbreviations for it. And, of course, the crossword indices are all in hexadecimal (this is Slashdot, after all!)

So, without further ado, here comes the crossword! Plain HTML is admittedly ugly and unpleasant to look at, so you may download and print a nice PDF version here [geocities.com] [geocities.com]. Good luck!

+-+- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +-+- +
|1 |2 |3 |4 |##|5 |6 |##|7 | |8 |##|9 |##|0a| |0b|0c|##|0d|
+-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+-+- +- +- +- +-+- +- +-+- +
|0e| | | |##|0f| |10| |##| |##|11| | |##|12| |13| |
+-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +- +-+-+- +- +- + +- +- +-+- +
| |##|##| |##|14| | | |##|15|16| |##| |##|17| | | |
+- +- - +- +- +-+-+- +- +- +- - +- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +
|##|18| | |19|##|##|1a| |1b| | |##|##|##|1c|####|##| |
+- +- +-+- +- +- +- - +- +- +- +-+-+- +- +- +- +- +-+- +
|1d| |##|##| |##|1e| | | |##|1f|20|21|22| |23|##|24|##|
+ +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- - +- +- +-+- +- +-+- +
|##|25|26|27| |##|##| |##|28|29|##|2a| | |##|2b|2c| |##|
+- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +- +-+
|##|2d| | |##|2e|2f|##|##|30| | | |##| |##|31| | |##|
+- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +-+- +
|##|##|##|32| | | |##|##|##| |##|##|33| |34|##| |##|##|
+-+- +- +- +- ++- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- + + +- +- +-+- +
|35|36|37|##|##|38| |39|##|3a|##|##|3b| |##| |##|3c| | |
+-+-+- +- +- ++- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- - +- +- +- + +- +
|3d| | | |3e|##|##|3f| | |##|40|##|##|41| | | |##|##|
+-+- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +-+- +- +- + - +- +- + +-+- +
| |##|##|##|42| |43| |##|44| | |45| | | |##|46|47|48|
+- +- - +- + +- +- +-+- +- +- + +- +- +-+- +- +- +-+- +
|49|4a| | | |##|4b| | | |##|4c| |##| |##|##|4d| | |
+- +- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- + +- +
|##| |##|##| |##| |##|##|4e|4f| |##|50| |51|##|52| | |
+-+- +- + +- +-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- + +- +- + +- +- +
|53| | | | |##| |##|54| | | | |##|55| | |##|##| |
+- +- +-+- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +- + +- +
|56| |##|##|##|57| | |##|##|##| |##|##| |##|##|##|58| |
+- +- +- - +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +
|59| |##|##|##|##| |##|5a| |5b|##|##|5c| |5d|##|5e|##| |
+- +- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- - +- +- +-+- +
| |##|##|5f| |60| |##| |##| |##|61| |##|62|63| | |##|
+- +- +- + +- +- +- +- +- - +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +
|##|64| | |##| |##|65| | | |##|##| |##|66| | |##|##|
+- +-+- +- +- +- - +- +- +- +- +-+-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +
|67| |##|68| | |##|69| |##|6a| | | |##|6b| | | |##|
+- +- +-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- +- +- +-+- +
|6c| | |##|##| |##|6d| | | |##|##|6e| | | | |##|6f|
+-+- +- +- +- +- +-+ +- +- +- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- +-+

THE CLUES:

Across
1. This band must've been desperate for publicity to give an interview to Slashdot!
5. Crapflooder impersonated well by Silicon Simian.
7. A special treat you earn for Bad Posting.
0A. Sean Kelly's ex-lover and former SlashNET IRCop.
0E. Ew! Between the eyes!
0F. This dog won't mess your carpet, shed fur all over the place, or do much else besides consume batteries.
11. Living proof that you get what you pay for.
12. The soundtrack for the World Wide Web.
14. Disney makes money to destroy free speech on the Internet every time you buy ____ on DVD.
15. Slashcode's overglorified killfile.
17. You were writing FOX about "The Tick" when you should've been writing your congressman about this bill.
18. A very Snotty troll.
1A. This young Afghan loves watching movies and JonKatz on his C64.
1D. The best text editor EVER!
1E. What you say!! If you say it one more time, I'll bludgeon you to death!
1F. These guys gave Linux mono.
25. These shiny discs feed money into a bloated media cartel and stifle fair use rights, but you buy them by the millions anyway.
28. Slashdot's top comment poster and story submitter.
2A. These networks "disrupt" artists' cash flows.
2B. Open Source codeword for amphetamines.
2D. RAM type optimized for Extended Data Output on old Pentiums.
2E. Hillary Rosen knows you're just itching to steal Charley Pride's __.
30. A hack to get a kernel designed only to boot off floppy disks to boot off a hard drive.
31. ___ BREAK HEAD WITH OPEN-SOURCE CD!!!
32. Marketers who resort to this tactic are worse than Hitler and should be tortured and killed.
33. This desktop environment kicks GNOME's ass!
35. Microsoft sold off this Unix, and it's gone downhill ever since.
38. An essential e-mail utility for child pornographers and terrorists.
3B. (0A Down)'s lucky number.
3C. It's not Unix, and it shows.
3D. Preface for 90% of Slashdot comments, and 100% of CmdrTaco's personal ads.
3F. Where non-free software goes on your file system.
41. You better mark all the comments as ____ in metamod unless you want to lose karma.
42. This international standards body, no matter what you may think, does NOT read Slashdot.
44. Head bitch of the RIAA.
46. A primitive chat program superseded by AOL Instant Messenger.
49. An online webzine which demonstrated that online subscriptions don't work to everybody except CmdrTaco.
4B. If you moderate in a way CmdrTaco doesn't like, you earn this special database flag.
4C. vi does a poor job of emulating this standard Unix text editor.
4D. To B or not __ _.
4E. You won't get much use out of this text-recognition technology if all you use your scanner for is scanning your ass.
50. The sound Michael's head makes when he's stuffing it up his rectum.
52. Unique index for a whole LIST of babble.
53. The world's best operating system!
54. Father of Methuselah, or old-school Slashdot troll.
55. You don't need to be a Kreskin to predict this operating system's future.
56. Most geeks sleep through this half of the day.
57. This open-source man was Natalie's first.
58. Carly's mission is to steer this company into the ground.
59. mimbleton's favorite subject prefix.
5A. Chewing this might help your babbling problem.
5C. Programming language named after Lord Byron's daughter.
5F. Dead drummer for CmdrTaco's favorite band, or ridiculous Liberal myth.
61. Every Slashdotter's dream is to get one of these.
62. The Firm that is spelling Armageddon for free speech on The Net.
64. These networks are the beginning of Disorganized Crime.
65. Shitty "bitch band" whose leader likes to bitch about the RIAA.
66. The only Adequacy [adequacy.org] [adequacy.org] editor with a real PhD.
67. I think 7 over 22 is both backwards AND wrong.
68. Mentioning this droid (and others) is what is keeping you from getting laid.
69. Two-letter country code for Oman.
6A. Giving a ____ Necklace involves "coming" on Heidi Wall's bosom.
6B. What people who can't afford Visual Studio use to search text files.
6C. This hacker tool is often used to replace "characters" in "strings".
6D. QueenTaco's maiden name.
6E. The best text editor EVER!
6F. The PDP-11 assembler that thinks it's a programming language.

Down
1. Taco thinks that a purchase of his publicly traded company's services is a ___.
2. The self-centered Windows 9x release after 98SE.
3. 3D Tamagotchi game designed by Peter Molyneux.
4. A crippled Photoshop wannabe.
5. Lock your penis bird in a cage to protect it from this text-outputting animal.
6. Russian Geeks in Space.
7. If your karma surpasses 25, you have this and a problem.
8. Luckily, michael was born too late to join THIS party.
9. If this Slashdot section's color scheme doesn't drive you away, Michael's snotty editorial remarks will.
0A. Suffering cerebral palsy didn't stop him from becoming Surprised by Wealth.
0B. The market leader in megahertz lies.
0C. Statement used to declare variables in Visual Basic.
0D. Media cartel dedicated to protecting Britney Spears from dirty hackers.
10. Once the greatest Karma Whore ever, now a suicidal loser seen only on (33 Down).
13. Game console that bankrupted its parent company because of hackers making free games for it.
16. The only Unix understandable by non-geeks.
18. (40 Down) likes his pages ____.
19. Do many eyes make all bugs shallow, or do too many cooks spoil the broth?
1C. Research? Linux? Software? Whatever!
20. The first step towards failure for Linux companies.
21. Every Slashdotter's duty (except those marked with (4B Across)).
22. Apple's stylish new IP theft device.
23. (43 Down)'s employer.
24. A flaky Open-Source knockoff of (38 Across).
26. ESR's birthday present to RMS.
27. This primitive operating system denies any service to its users.
29. Unique index for a particular piece of babble.
2C. A tasty breakfast treat -- down your pants!
2E. You hit this once you get 50 karma points.
2F. This marketing guy troll sure is dumb!
33. This site is decidedly not Slashdot.
34. An easy way to lose all your karma is to offer your account for sale on this popular auction site.
35. Unfortunately, this famous online Nazi's treatment of the Censorware Project [sethf.com] [sethf.com] wasn't just a game.
36. Two-letter country code for the 51st state.
37. A geek's computer is always __.
39. ____, Lover, Aesthete, Programmer. There is no contradiction.
3A. The XP makes it go faster!
3E. The world's worst operating system!
40. The only troll with a freaks list longer than JonKatz'.
41. The OS all the cool people use now that Linux isn't trendy anymore.
43. A top-flight IT consultant who somehow manages to find time in his busy schedule to post to Slashdot.
45. What comes after as(1) and before strip(1) in the C build process.
47. VA Software has the world's worst ___.
48. This Senate bill comes closer to passing every time you go to see Lord of the Rings again.
4A. Legalized child pornography.
4F. What the Greeks went to Delphi for, Geeks go to this state for.
51. The Hellmouth should've eaten you here.
53. This rocker's battle against file-sharing networks won't end until he can Kill 'Em All.
5A. This desktop environment kicks KDE's ass!
5B. This modest and self-effacing troll was one of the first on Slashdot.
5C. You'd have to think different to justify spending money on this company's overpriced products.
5D. A game console which thought it was a full-featured computer system.
5E. Cofounder of Chips 'n' Dips.
5F. It may not have the best sound quality, but at least it's better than Ogg Vorbis.
60. Preface for the 10% of Slashdot comments not prefaced with (3D Across).
63. Apple stole all their ideas from this research group.
64. Bye bye, miss USian ___, drove the Cruiser like some loser who starts posts with a *sigh* ...
65. A dynamically updated list of the biggest losers on Slashdot.
67. Standard programming language implemented by most high-end printers.
6F. This language's lack of bounds checking is responsible for 90% of software security holes out there.

fin

VA Software owns OSDN, and VA is a publicly-held company. In the US, having stockholders means you have to publish an annual report, which (among other things) must provide financial information. So, by viewing said annual report, you can see what their costs are, where their income originates, and what they use it for.

"if ... we could see what their costs are ... I'd be glad to contribute."

I'm sure they look forward to your check.

VA Software owns OSDN, and VA is a publicly-held company. In the US, having stockholders means you have to publish an annual report, which (among other things) must provide financial information. So, by viewing said annual report, you can see what their costs are, where their income originates, and what they use it for.

"if ... we could see what their costs are ... I'd be glad to contribute."

I'm sure they look forward to your check.

Note: Now that the Great Slashdot Blackout has started, many of you are probably wondering what you can do instead of post relevant comments (remember, no comments from April 21-27!). Well, the answer is to solve this puzzle! Feel free to repost this puzzle as many times as possible so everyone gets a fair chance to play, and if you have moderator points, mod it up so that (again) everyone gets a fair chance to play. The puzzle contest is over when the Slashdot Blackout is over! After the Blackout is over, please, return to your regularly scheduled activities and don't repost the puzzle anymore. Thanks!

Now's your chance to see just how well you've been paying attention during the past four years of chips, dips, Micro$loth, Napster, IPOs, BSD, rights online, editor censorship, and of course Linux, Linux, Linux! Complete the following professional-quality crossword puzzle chock full of trivia on Slashdot, Open Source, and geekiness in general for not only posterity but GREAT PRIZES!! Prizes include the following:

A fresh box of QUAKER GRITS [quakergrits.com] [quakergrits.com]!
Your very own SLASHDOT CRUISER [slashdot.org] [slashdot.org]!
A hot date [ea.com] [ea.com] with NATALIE PORTMAN [natalieportman.com] [natalieportman.com]!
A genuine VA Lin^H^H^HSOFTWARE STOCK CERTIFICATE [vasoftware.com] [vasoftware.com]!

It doesn't get much better than this, folks! Here's how to play:

Fill in the crossword completely. No incomplete (or incorrect) solutions will be considered.
Once you're sure you have the crossword completely figured out, submit it to slashdot_crossword at engineer.com [mailto] [mailto]. If you indeed have the solution, one of the above four prizes are yours! The prizes are in limited supply (well, except for the VA stock certificates), so get those solutions in early!
The winners will be announced on 2002/04/28, to be praised in -1 crapfloods for all eternity (or at least until the crapflooders get bored and go back to posting gay Slashdot editor fanfics).

While we fully assert that this crossword is professional quality, there are of course some variations from the standard crossword form to make things more interesting for the Slashdot crowd. Some answers are used more than once. Digits (0-9) exist in some answers. Some clues are repeated with different answers. Many of the answers are acronyms or initialisms; if the answer that comes to mind doesn't fit, try thinking of common abbreviations for it. And, of course, the crossword indices are all in hexadecimal (this is Slashdot, after all!)

So, without further ado, here comes the crossword! Plain HTML is admittedly ugly and unpleasant to look at, so you may download and print a nice PDF version here [geocities.com] [geocities.com]. Good luck!

+-+- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +-+- +
|1 |2 |3 |4 |##|5 |6 |##|7 | |8 |##|9 |##|0a| |0b|0c|##|0d|
+-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+-+- +- +- +- +-+- +- +-+- +
|0e| | | |##|0f| |10| |##| |##|11| | |##|12| |13| |
+-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +- +-+-+- +- +- + +- +- +-+- +
| |##|##| |##|14| | | |##|15|16| |##| |##|17| | | |
+- +- - +- +- +-+-+- +- +- +- - +- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +
|##|18| | |19|##|##|1a| |1b| | |##|##|##|1c|####|##| |
+- +- +-+- +- +- +- - +- +- +- +-+-+- +- +- +- +- +-+- +
|1d| |##|##| |##|1e| | | |##|1f|20|21|22| |23|##|24|##|
+ +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- - +- +- +-+- +- +-+- +
|##|25|26|27| |##|##| |##|28|29|##|2a| | |##|2b|2c| |##|
+- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +- +-+
|##|2d| | |##|2e|2f|##|##|30| | | |##| |##|31| | |##|
+- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +-+- +
|##|##|##|32| | | |##|##|##| |##|##|33| |34|##| |##|##|
+-+- +- +- +- ++- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- + + +- +- +-+- +
|35|36|37|##|##|38| |39|##|3a|##|##|3b| |##| |##|3c| | |
+-+-+- +- +- ++- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- - +- +- +- + +- +
|3d| | | |3e|##|##|3f| | |##|40|##|##|41| | | |##|##|
+-+- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +-+- +- +- + - +- +- + +-+- +
| |##|##|##|42| |43| |##|44| | |45| | | |##|46|47|48|
+- +- - +- + +- +- +-+- +- +- + +- +- +-+- +- +- +-+- +
|49|4a| | | |##|4b| | | |##|4c| |##| |##|##|4d| | |
+- +- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- + +- +
|##| |##|##| |##| |##|##|4e|4f| |##|50| |51|##|52| | |
+-+- +- + +- +-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- + +- +- + +- +- +
|53| | | | |##| |##|54| | | | |##|55| | |##|##| |
+- +- +-+- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +- + +- +
|56| |##|##|##|57| | |##|##|##| |##|##| |##|##|##|58| |
+- +- +- - +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +
|59| |##|##|##|##| |##|5a| |5b|##|##|5c| |5d|##|5e|##| |
+- +- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- - +- +- +-+- +
| |##|##|5f| |60| |##| |##| |##|61| |##|62|63| | |##|
+- +- +- + +- +- +- +- +- - +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +
|##|64| | |##| |##|65| | | |##|##| |##|66| | |##|##|
+- +-+- +- +- +- - +- +- +- +- +-+-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +
|67| |##|68| | |##|69| |##|6a| | | |##|6b| | | |##|
+- +- +-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- +- +- +-+- +
|6c| | |##|##| |##|6d| | | |##|##|6e| | | | |##|6f|
+-+- +- +- +- +- +-+ +- +- +- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- +-+

THE CLUES:

Across
1. This band must've been desperate for publicity to give an interview to Slashdot!
5. Crapflooder impersonated well by Silicon Simian.
7. A special treat you earn for Bad Posting.
0A. Sean Kelly's ex-lover and former SlashNET IRCop.
0E. Ew! Between the eyes!
0F. This dog won't mess your carpet, shed fur all over the place, or do much else besides consume batteries.
11. Living proof that you get what you pay for.
12. The soundtrack for the World Wide Web.
14. Disney makes money to destroy free speech on the Internet every time you buy ____ on DVD.
15. Slashcode's overglorified killfile.
17. You were writing FOX about "The Tick" when you should've been writing your congressman about this bill.
18. A very Snotty troll.
1A. This young Afghan loves watching movies and JonKatz on his C64.
1D. The best text editor EVER!
1E. What you say!! If you say it one more time, I'll bludgeon you to death!
1F. These guys gave Linux mono.
25. These shiny discs feed money into a bloated media cartel and stifle fair use rights, but you buy them by the millions anyway.
28. Slashdot's top comment poster and story submitter.
2A. These networks "disrupt" artists' cash flows.
2B. Open Source codeword for amphetamines.
2D. RAM type optimized for Extended Data Output on old Pentiums.
2E. Hillary Rosen knows you're just itching to steal Charley Pride's __.
30. A hack to get a kernel designed only to boot off floppy disks to boot off a hard drive.
31. ___ BREAK HEAD WITH OPEN-SOURCE CD!!!
32. Marketers who resort to this tactic are worse than Hitler and should be tortured and killed.
33. This desktop environment kicks GNOME's ass!
35. Microsoft sold off this Unix, and it's gone downhill ever since.
38. An essential e-mail utility for child pornographers and terrorists.
3B. (0A Down)'s lucky number.
3C. It's not Unix, and it shows.
3D. Preface for 90% of Slashdot comments, and 100% of CmdrTaco's personal ads.
3F. Where non-free software goes on your file system.
41. You better mark all the comments as ____ in metamod unless you want to lose karma.
42. This international standards body, no matter what you may think, does NOT read Slashdot.
44. Head bitch of the RIAA.
46. A primitive chat program superseded by AOL Instant Messenger.
49. An online webzine which demonstrated that online subscriptions don't work to everybody except CmdrTaco.
4B. If you moderate in a way CmdrTaco doesn't like, you earn this special database flag.
4C. vi does a poor job of emulating this standard Unix text editor.
4D. To B or not __ _.
4E. You won't get much use out of this text-recognition technology if all you use your scanner for is scanning your ass.
50. The sound Michael's head makes when he's stuffing it up his rectum.
52. Unique index for a whole LIST of babble.
53. The world's best operating system!
54. Father of Methuselah, or old-school Slashdot troll.
55. You don't need to be a Kreskin to predict this operating system's future.
56. Most geeks sleep through this half of the day.
57. This open-source man was Natalie's first.
58. Carly's mission is to steer this company into the ground.
59. mimbleton's favorite subject prefix.
5A. Chewing this might help your babbling problem.
5C. Programming language named after Lord Byron's daughter.
5F. Dead drummer for CmdrTaco's favorite band, or ridiculous Liberal myth.
61. Every Slashdotter's dream is to get one of these.
62. The Firm that is spelling Armageddon for free speech on The Net.
64. These networks are the beginning of Disorganized Crime.
65. Shitty "bitch band" whose leader likes to bitch about the RIAA.
66. The only Adequacy [adequacy.org] [adequacy.org] editor with a real PhD.
67. I think 7 over 22 is both backwards AND wrong.
68. Mentioning this droid (and others) is what is keeping you from getting laid.
69. Two-letter country code for Oman.
6A. Giving a ____ Necklace involves "coming" on Heidi Wall's bosom.
6B. What people who can't afford Visual Studio use to search text files.
6C. This hacker tool is often used to replace "characters" in "strings".
6D. QueenTaco's maiden name.
6E. The best text editor EVER!
6F. The PDP-11 assembler that thinks it's a programming language.

Down
1. Taco thinks that a purchase of his publicly traded company's services is a ___.
2. The self-centered Windows 9x release after 98SE.
3. 3D Tamagotchi game designed by Peter Molyneux.
4. A crippled Photoshop wannabe.
5. Lock your penis bird in a cage to protect it from this text-outputting animal.
6. Russian Geeks in Space.
7. If your karma surpasses 25, you have this and a problem.
8. Luckily, michael was born too late to join THIS party.
9. If this Slashdot section's color scheme doesn't drive you away, Michael's snotty editorial remarks will.
0A. Suffering cerebral palsy didn't stop him from becoming Surprised by Wealth.
0B. The market leader in megahertz lies.
0C. Statement used to declare variables in Visual Basic.
0D. Media cartel dedicated to protecting Britney Spears from dirty hackers.
10. Once the greatest Karma Whore ever, now a suicidal loser seen only on (33 Down).
13. Game console that bankrupted its parent company because of hackers making free games for it.
16. The only Unix understandable by non-geeks.
18. (40 Down) likes his pages ____.
19. Do many eyes make all bugs shallow, or do too many cooks spoil the broth?
1C. Research? Linux? Software? Whatever!
20. The first step towards failure for Linux companies.
21. Every Slashdotter's duty (except those marked with (4B Across)).
22. Apple's stylish new IP theft device.
23. (43 Down)'s employer.
24. A flaky Open-Source knockoff of (38 Across).
26. ESR's birthday present to RMS.
27. This primitive operating system denies any service to its users.
29. Unique index for a particular piece of babble.
2C. A tasty breakfast treat -- down your pants!
2E. You hit this once you get 50 karma points.
2F. This marketing guy troll sure is dumb!
33. This site is decidedly not Slashdot.
34. An easy way to lose all your karma is to offer your account for sale on this popular auction site.
35. Unfortunately, this famous online Nazi's treatment of the Censorware Project [sethf.com] [sethf.com] wasn't just a game.
36. Two-letter country code for the 51st state.
37. A geek's computer is always __.
39. ____, Lover, Aesthete, Programmer. There is no contradiction.
3A. The XP makes it go faster!
3E. The world's worst operating system!
40. The only troll with a freaks list longer than JonKatz'.
41. The OS all the cool people use now that Linux isn't trendy anymore.
43. A top-flight IT consultant who somehow manages to find time in his busy schedule to post to Slashdot.
45. What comes after as(1) and before strip(1) in the C build process.
47. VA Software has the world's worst ___.
48. This Senate bill comes closer to passing every time you go to see Lord of the Rings again.
4A. Legalized child pornography.
4F. What the Greeks went to Delphi for, Geeks go to this state for.
51. The Hellmouth should've eaten you here.
53. This rocker's battle against file-sharing networks won't end until he can Kill 'Em All.
5A. This desktop environment kicks KDE's ass!
5B. This modest and self-effacing troll was one of the first on Slashdot.
5C. You'd have to think different to justify spending money on this company's overpriced products.
5D. A game console which thought it was a full-featured computer system.
5E. Cofounder of Chips 'n' Dips.
5F. It may not have the best sound quality, but at least it's better than Ogg Vorbis.
60. Preface for the 10% of Slashdot comments not prefaced with (3D Across).
63. Apple stole all their ideas from this research group.
64. Bye bye, miss USian ___, drove the Cruiser like some loser who starts posts with a *sigh* ...
65. A dynamically updated list of the biggest losers on Slashdot.
67. Standard programming language implemented by most high-end printers.
6F. This language's lack of bounds checking is responsible for 90% of software security holes out there.

fin

Note: Now that the Great Slashdot Blackout has started, many of you are probably wondering what you can do instead of post relevant comments (remember, no comments from April 21-27!). Well, the answer is to solve this puzzle! Feel free to repost this puzzle as many times as possible so everyone gets a fair chance to play, and if you have moderator points, mod it up so that (again) everyone gets a fair chance to play. The puzzle contest is over when the Slashdot Blackout is over! After the Blackout is over, please, return to your regularly scheduled activities and don't repost the puzzle anymore. Thanks!

Now's your chance to see just how well you've been paying attention during the past four years of chips, dips, Micro$loth, Napster, IPOs, BSD, rights online, editor censorship, and of course Linux, Linux, Linux! Complete the following professional-quality crossword puzzle chock full of trivia on Slashdot, Open Source, and geekiness in general for not only posterity but GREAT PRIZES!! Prizes include the following:

A fresh box of QUAKER GRITS [quakergrits.com] [quakergrits.com]!
Your very own SLASHDOT CRUISER [slashdot.org] [slashdot.org]!
A hot date [ea.com] [ea.com] with NATALIE PORTMAN [natalieportman.com] [natalieportman.com]!
A genuine VA Lin^H^H^HSOFTWARE STOCK CERTIFICATE [vasoftware.com] [vasoftware.com]!

It doesn't get much better than this, folks! Here's how to play:

Fill in the crossword completely. No incomplete (or incorrect) solutions will be considered.
Once you're sure you have the crossword completely figured out, submit it to slashdot_crossword at engineer.com [mailto] [mailto]. If you indeed have the solution, one of the above four prizes are yours! The prizes are in limited supply (well, except for the VA stock certificates), so get those solutions in early!
The winners will be announced on 2002/04/28, to be praised in -1 crapfloods for all eternity (or at least until the crapflooders get bored and go back to posting gay Slashdot editor fanfics).

While we fully assert that this crossword is professional quality, there are of course some variations from the standard crossword form to make things more interesting for the Slashdot crowd. Some answers are used more than once. Digits (0-9) exist in some answers. Some clues are repeated with different answers. Many of the answers are acronyms or initialisms; if the answer that comes to mind doesn't fit, try thinking of common abbreviations for it. And, of course, the crossword indices are all in hexadecimal (this is Slashdot, after all!)

So, without further ado, here comes the crossword! Plain HTML is admittedly ugly and unpleasant to look at, so you may download and print a nice PDF version here [geocities.com] [geocities.com]. Good luck!

+-+- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +-+- +
|1 |2 |3 |4 |##|5 |6 |##|7 | |8 |##|9 |##|0a| |0b|0c|##|0d|
+-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+-+- +- +- +- +-+- +- +-+- +
|0e| | | |##|0f| |10| |##| |##|11| | |##|12| |13| |
+-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +- +-+-+- +- +- + +- +- +-+- +
| |##|##| |##|14| | | |##|15|16| |##| |##|17| | | |
+- +- - +- +- +-+-+- +- +- +- - +- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +
|##|18| | |19|##|##|1a| |1b| | |##|##|##|1c|####|##| |
+- +- +-+- +- +- +- - +- +- +- +-+-+- +- +- +- +- +-+- +
|1d| |##|##| |##|1e| | | |##|1f|20|21|22| |23|##|24|##|
+ +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- - +- +- +-+- +- +-+- +
|##|25|26|27| |##|##| |##|28|29|##|2a| | |##|2b|2c| |##|
+- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +- +-+
|##|2d| | |##|2e|2f|##|##|30| | | |##| |##|31| | |##|
+- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +-+- +
|##|##|##|32| | | |##|##|##| |##|##|33| |34|##| |##|##|
+-+- +- +- +- ++- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- + + +- +- +-+- +
|35|36|37|##|##|38| |39|##|3a|##|##|3b| |##| |##|3c| | |
+-+-+- +- +- ++- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- - +- +- +- + +- +
|3d| | | |3e|##|##|3f| | |##|40|##|##|41| | | |##|##|
+-+- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +-+- +- +- + - +- +- + +-+- +
| |##|##|##|42| |43| |##|44| | |45| | | |##|46|47|48|
+- +- - +- + +- +- +-+- +- +- + +- +- +-+- +- +- +-+- +
|49|4a| | | |##|4b| | | |##|4c| |##| |##|##|4d| | |
+- +- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- + +- +
|##| |##|##| |##| |##|##|4e|4f| |##|50| |51|##|52| | |
+-+- +- + +- +-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- + +- +- + +- +- +
|53| | | | |##| |##|54| | | | |##|55| | |##|##| |
+- +- +-+- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +- + +- +
|56| |##|##|##|57| | |##|##|##| |##|##| |##|##|##|58| |
+- +- +- - +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +
|59| |##|##|##|##| |##|5a| |5b|##|##|5c| |5d|##|5e|##| |
+- +- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- - +- +- +-+- +
| |##|##|5f| |60| |##| |##| |##|61| |##|62|63| | |##|
+- +- +- + +- +- +- +- +- - +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +
|##|64| | |##| |##|65| | | |##|##| |##|66| | |##|##|
+- +-+- +- +- +- - +- +- +- +- +-+-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +
|67| |##|68| | |##|69| |##|6a| | | |##|6b| | | |##|
+- +- +-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- +- +- +-+- +
|6c| | |##|##| |##|6d| | | |##|##|6e| | | | |##|6f|
+-+- +- +- +- +- +-+ +- +- +- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- +-+

THE CLUES:

Across
1. This band must've been desperate for publicity to give an interview to Slashdot!
5. Crapflooder impersonated well by Silicon Simian.
7. A special treat you earn for Bad Posting.
0A. Sean Kelly's ex-lover and former SlashNET IRCop.
0E. Ew! Between the eyes!
0F. This dog won't mess your carpet, shed fur all over the place, or do much else besides consume batteries.
11. Living proof that you get what you pay for.
12. The soundtrack for the World Wide Web.
14. Disney makes money to destroy free speech on the Internet every time you buy ____ on DVD.
15. Slashcode's overglorified killfile.
17. You were writing FOX about "The Tick" when you should've been writing your congressman about this bill.
18. A very Snotty troll.
1A. This young Afghan loves watching movies and JonKatz on his C64.
1D. The best text editor EVER!
1E. What you say!! If you say it one more time, I'll bludgeon you to death!
1F. These guys gave Linux mono.
25. These shiny discs feed money into a bloated media cartel and stifle fair use rights, but you buy them by the millions anyway.
28. Slashdot's top comment poster and story submitter.
2A. These networks "disrupt" artists' cash flows.
2B. Open Source codeword for amphetamines.
2D. RAM type optimized for Extended Data Output on old Pentiums.
2E. Hillary Rosen knows you're just itching to steal Charley Pride's __.
30. A hack to get a kernel designed only to boot off floppy disks to boot off a hard drive.
31. ___ BREAK HEAD WITH OPEN-SOURCE CD!!!
32. Marketers who resort to this tactic are worse than Hitler and should be tortured and killed.
33. This desktop environment kicks GNOME's ass!
35. Microsoft sold off this Unix, and it's gone downhill ever since.
38. An essential e-mail utility for child pornographers and terrorists.
3B. (0A Down)'s lucky number.
3C. It's not Unix, and it shows.
3D. Preface for 90% of Slashdot comments, and 100% of CmdrTaco's personal ads.
3F. Where non-free software goes on your file system.
41. You better mark all the comments as ____ in metamod unless you want to lose karma.
42. This international standards body, no matter what you may think, does NOT read Slashdot.
44. Head bitch of the RIAA.
46. A primitive chat program superseded by AOL Instant Messenger.
49. An online webzine which demonstrated that online subscriptions don't work to everybody except CmdrTaco.
4B. If you moderate in a way CmdrTaco doesn't like, you earn this special database flag.
4C. vi does a poor job of emulating this standard Unix text editor.
4D. To B or not __ _.
4E. You won't get much use out of this text-recognition technology if all you use your scanner for is scanning your ass.
50. The sound Michael's head makes when he's stuffing it up his rectum.
52. Unique index for a whole LIST of babble.
53. The world's best operating system!
54. Father of Methuselah, or old-school Slashdot troll.
55. You don't need to be a Kreskin to predict this operating system's future.
56. Most geeks sleep through this half of the day.
57. This open-source man was Natalie's first.
58. Carly's mission is to steer this company into the ground.
59. mimbleton's favorite subject prefix.
5A. Chewing this might help your babbling problem.
5C. Programming language named after Lord Byron's daughter.
5F. Dead drummer for CmdrTaco's favorite band, or ridiculous Liberal myth.
61. Every Slashdotter's dream is to get one of these.
62. The Firm that is spelling Armageddon for free speech on The Net.
64. These networks are the beginning of Disorganized Crime.
65. Shitty "bitch band" whose leader likes to bitch about the RIAA.
66. The only Adequacy [adequacy.org] [adequacy.org] editor with a real PhD.
67. I think 7 over 22 is both backwards AND wrong.
68. Mentioning this droid (and others) is what is keeping you from getting laid.
69. Two-letter country code for Oman.
6A. Giving a ____ Necklace involves "coming" on Heidi Wall's bosom.
6B. What people who can't afford Visual Studio use to search text files.
6C. This hacker tool is often used to replace "characters" in "strings".
6D. QueenTaco's maiden name.
6E. The best text editor EVER!
6F. The PDP-11 assembler that thinks it's a programming language.

Down
1. Taco thinks that a purchase of his publicly traded company's services is a ___.
2. The self-centered Windows 9x release after 98SE.
3. 3D Tamagotchi game designed by Peter Molyneux.
4. A crippled Photoshop wannabe.
5. Lock your penis bird in a cage to protect it from this text-outputting animal.
6. Russian Geeks in Space.
7. If your karma surpasses 25, you have this and a problem.
8. Luckily, michael was born too late to join THIS party.
9. If this Slashdot section's color scheme doesn't drive you away, Michael's snotty editorial remarks will.
0A. Suffering cerebral palsy didn't stop him from becoming Surprised by Wealth.
0B. The market leader in megahertz lies.
0C. Statement used to declare variables in Visual Basic.
0D. Media cartel dedicated to protecting Britney Spears from dirty hackers.
10. Once the greatest Karma Whore ever, now a suicidal loser seen only on (33 Down).
13. Game console that bankrupted its parent company because of hackers making free games for it.
16. The only Unix understandable by non-geeks.
18. (40 Down) likes his pages ____.
19. Do many eyes make all bugs shallow, or do too many cooks spoil the broth?
1C. Research? Linux? Software? Whatever!
20. The first step towards failure for Linux companies.
21. Every Slashdotter's duty (except those marked with (4B Across)).
22. Apple's stylish new IP theft device.
23. (43 Down)'s employer.
24. A flaky Open-Source knockoff of (38 Across).
26. ESR's birthday present to RMS.
27. This primitive operating system denies any service to its users.
29. Unique index for a particular piece of babble.
2C. A tasty breakfast treat -- down your pants!
2E. You hit this once you get 50 karma points.
2F. This marketing guy troll sure is dumb!
33. This site is decidedly not Slashdot.
34. An easy way to lose all your karma is to offer your account for sale on this popular auction site.
35. Unfortunately, this famous online Nazi's treatment of the Censorware Project [sethf.com] [sethf.com] wasn't just a game.
36. Two-letter country code for the 51st state.
37. A geek's computer is always __.
39. ____, Lover, Aesthete, Programmer. There is no contradiction.
3A. The XP makes it go faster!
3E. The world's worst operating system!
40. The only troll with a freaks list longer than JonKatz'.
41. The OS all the cool people use now that Linux isn't trendy anymore.
43. A top-flight IT consultant who somehow manages to find time in his busy schedule to post to Slashdot.
45. What comes after as(1) and before strip(1) in the C build process.
47. VA Software has the world's worst ___.
48. This Senate bill comes closer to passing every time you go to see Lord of the Rings again.
4A. Legalized child pornography.
4F. What the Greeks went to Delphi for, Geeks go to this state for.
51. The Hellmouth should've eaten you here.
53. This rocker's battle against file-sharing networks won't end until he can Kill 'Em All.
5A. This desktop environment kicks KDE's ass!
5B. This modest and self-effacing troll was one of the first on Slashdot.
5C. You'd have to think different to justify spending money on this company's overpriced products.
5D. A game console which thought it was a full-featured computer system.
5E. Cofounder of Chips 'n' Dips.
5F. It may not have the best sound quality, but at least it's better than Ogg Vorbis.
60. Preface for the 10% of Slashdot comments not prefaced with (3D Across).
63. Apple stole all their ideas from this research group.
64. Bye bye, miss USian ___, drove the Cruiser like some loser who starts posts with a *sigh* ...
65. A dynamically updated list of the biggest losers on Slashdot.
67. Standard programming language implemented by most high-end printers.
6F. This language's lack of bounds checking is responsible for 90% of software security holes out there.

fin

Now's your chance to see just how well you've been paying attention during the past four years of chips, dips, Micro$loth, Napster, IPOs, BSD, rights online, editor censorship, and of course Linux, Linux, Linux! Complete the following professional-quality crossword puzzle chock full of trivia on Slashdot, Open Source, and geekiness in general for not only posterity but GREAT PRIZES!! Prizes include the following:

A fresh box of QUAKER GRITS [quakergrits.com]!
Your very own SLASHDOT CRUISER [slashdot.org]!
A hot date [ea.com] with NATALIE PORTMAN [natalieportman.com]!
A genuine VA Lin^H^H^HSOFTWARE STOCK CERTIFICATE [vasoftware.com]!

It doesn't get much better than this, folks! Here's how to play:

Fill in the crossword completely. No incomplete (or incorrect) solutions will be considered.
Once you're sure you have the crossword completely figured out, submit it to slashdot_crossword at engineer.com [mailto]. If you indeed have the solution, one of the above four prizes are yours! The prizes are in limited supply (well, except for the VA stock certificates), so get those solutions in early!
The winners will be announced on 2002/04/28, to be praised in -1 crapfloods for all eternity (or at least until the crapflooders get bored and go back to posting gay Slashdot editor fanfics).

While we fully assert that this crossword is professional quality, there are of course some variations from the standard crossword form to make things more interesting for the Slashdot crowd. Some answers are used more than once. Digits (0-9) exist in some answers. Some clues are repeated with different answers. Many of the answers are acronyms or initialisms; if the answer that comes to mind doesn't fit, try thinking of common abbreviations for it. And, of course, the crossword indices are all in hexadecimal (this is Slashdot, after all!)

So, without further ado, here comes the crossword! Plain HTML is admittedly ugly and unpleasant to look at, so you may download and print a nice PDF version here [geocities.com]. Good luck!

+-+- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +-+- +
|1 |2 |3 |4 |##|5 |6 |##|7 | |8 |##|9 |##|0a| |0b|0c|##|0d|
+-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+-+- +- +- +- +-+- +- +-+- +
|0e| | | |##|0f| |10| |##| |##|11| | |##|12| |13| |
+-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +- +-+-+- +- +- + +- +- +-+- +
| |##|##| |##|14| | | |##|15|16| |##| |##|17| | | |
+- +- - +- +- +-+-+- +- +- +- - +- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +
|##|18| | |19|##|##|1a| |1b| | |##|##|##|1c|####|##| |
+- +- +-+- +- +- +- - +- +- +- +-+-+- +- +- +- +- +-+- +
|1d| |##|##| |##|1e| | | |##|1f|20|21|22| |23|##|24|##|
+ +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- - +- +- +-+- +- +-+- +
|##|25|26|27| |##|##| |##|28|29|##|2a| | |##|2b|2c| |##|
+- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +- +-+
|##|2d| | |##|2e|2f|##|##|30| | | |##| |##|31| | |##|
+- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +-+- +
|##|##|##|32| | | |##|##|##| |##|##|33| |34|##| |##|##|
+-+- +- +- +- ++- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- + + +- +- +-+- +
|35|36|37|##|##|38| |39|##|3a|##|##|3b| |##| |##|3c| | |
+-+-+- +- +- ++- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- - +- +- +- + +- +
|3d| | | |3e|##|##|3f| | |##|40|##|##|41| | | |##|##|
+-+- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +-+- +- +- + - +- +- + +-+- +
| |##|##|##|42| |43| |##|44| | |45| | | |##|46|47|48|
+- +- - +- + +- +- +-+- +- +- + +- +- +-+- +- +- +-+- +
|49|4a| | | |##|4b| | | |##|4c| |##| |##|##|4d| | |
+- +- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- + +- +
|##| |##|##| |##| |##|##|4e|4f| |##|50| |51|##|52| | |
+-+- +- + +- +-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- + +- +- + +- +- +
|53| | | | |##| |##|54| | | | |##|55| | |##|##| |
+- +- +-+- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +- + +- +
|56| |##|##|##|57| | |##|##|##| |##|##| |##|##|##|58| |
+- +- +- - +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +
|59| |##|##|##|##| |##|5a| |5b|##|##|5c| |5d|##|5e|##| |
+- +- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- - +- +- +-+- +
| |##|##|5f| |60| |##| |##| |##|61| |##|62|63| | |##|
+- +- +- + +- +- +- +- +- - +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +
|##|64| | |##| |##|65| | | |##|##| |##|66| | |##|##|
+- +-+- +- +- +- - +- +- +- +- +-+-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +
|67| |##|68| | |##|69| |##|6a| | | |##|6b| | | |##|
+- +- +-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- +- +- +-+- +
|6c| | |##|##| |##|6d| | | |##|##|6e| | | | |##|6f|
+-+- +- +- +- +- +-+ +- +- +- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- +-+

THE CLUES:

Across
1. This band must've been desperate for publicity to give an interview to Slashdot!
5. Crapflooder impersonated well by Silicon Simian.
7. A special treat you earn for Bad Posting.
0A. Sean Kelly's ex-lover and former SlashNET IRCop.
0E. Ew! Between the eyes!
0F. This dog won't mess your carpet, shed fur all over the place, or do much else besides consume batteries.
11. Living proof that you get what you pay for.
12. The soundtrack for the World Wide Web.
14. Disney makes money to destroy free speech on the Internet every time you buy ____ on DVD.
15. Slashcode's overglorified killfile.
17. You were writing FOX about "The Tick" when you should've been writing your congressman about this bill.
18. A very Snotty troll.
1A. This young Afghan loves watching movies and JonKatz on his C64.
1D. The best text editor EVER!
1E. What you say!! If you say it one more time, I'll bludgeon you to death!
1F. These guys gave Linux mono.
25. These shiny discs feed money into a bloated media cartel and stifle fair use rights, but you buy them by the millions anyway.
28. Slashdot's top comment poster and story submitter.
2A. These networks "disrupt" artists' cash flows.
2B. Open Source codeword for amphetamines.
2D. RAM type optimized for Extended Data Output on old Pentiums.
2E. Hillary Rosen knows you're just itching to steal Charley Pride's __.
30. A hack to get a kernel designed only to boot off floppy disks to boot off a hard drive.
31. ___ BREAK HEAD WITH OPEN-SOURCE CD!!!
32. Marketers who resort to this tactic are worse than Hitler and should be tortured and killed.
33. This desktop environment kicks GNOME's ass!
35. Microsoft sold off this Unix, and it's gone downhill ever since.
38. An essential e-mail utility for child pornographers and terrorists.
3B. (0A Down)'s lucky number.
3C. It's not Unix, and it shows.
3D. Preface for 90% of Slashdot comments, and 100% of CmdrTaco's personal ads.
3F. Where non-free software goes on your file system.
41. You better mark all the comments as ____ in metamod unless you want to lose karma.
42. This international standards body, no matter what you may think, does NOT read Slashdot.
44. Head bitch of the RIAA.
46. A primitive chat program superseded by AOL Instant Messenger.
49. An online webzine which demonstrated that online subscriptions don't work to everybody except CmdrTaco.
4B. If you moderate in a way CmdrTaco doesn't like, you earn this special database flag.
4C. vi does a poor job of emulating this standard Unix text editor.
4D. To B or not __ _.
4E. You won't get much use out of this text-recognition technology if all you use your scanner for is scanning your ass.
50. The sound Michael's head makes when he's stuffing it up his rectum.
52. Unique index for a whole LIST of babble.
53. The world's best operating system!
54. Father of Methuselah, or old-school Slashdot troll.
55. You don't need to be a Kreskin to predict this operating system's future.
56. Most geeks sleep through this half of the day.
57. This open-source man was Natalie's first.
58. Carly's mission is to steer this company into the ground.
59. mimbleton's favorite subject prefix.
5A. Chewing this might help your babbling problem.
5C. Programming language named after Lord Byron's daughter.
5F. Dead drummer for CmdrTaco's favorite band, or ridiculous Liberal myth.
61. Every Slashdotter's dream is to get one of these.
62. The Firm that is spelling Armageddon for free speech on The Net.
64. These networks are the beginning of Disorganized Crime.
65. Shitty "bitch band" whose leader likes to bitch about the RIAA.
66. The only Adequacy [adequacy.org] editor with a real PhD.
67. I think 7 over 22 is both backwards AND wrong.
68. Mentioning this droid (and others) is what is keeping you from getting laid.
69. Two-letter country code for Oman.
6A. Giving a ____ Necklace involves "coming" on Heidi Wall's bosom.
6B. What people who can't afford Visual Studio use to search text files.
6C. This hacker tool is often used to replace "characters" in "strings".
6D. QueenTaco's maiden name.
6E. The best text editor EVER!
6F. The PDP-11 assembler that thinks it's a programming language.

Down
1. Taco thinks that a purchase of his publicly traded company's services is a ___.
2. The self-centered Windows 9x release after 98SE.
3. 3D Tamagotchi game designed by Peter Molyneux.
4. A crippled Photoshop wannabe.
5. Lock your penis bird in a cage to protect it from this text-outputting animal.
6. Russian Geeks in Space.
7. If your karma surpasses 25, you have this and a problem.
8. Luckily, michael was born too late to join THIS party.
9. If this Slashdot section's color scheme doesn't drive you away, Michael's snotty editorial remarks will.
0A. Suffering cerebral palsy didn't stop him from becoming Surprised by Wealth.
0B. The market leader in megahertz lies.
0C. Statement used to declare variables in Visual Basic.
0D. Media cartel dedicated to protecting Britney Spears from dirty hackers.
10. Once the greatest Karma Whore ever, now a suicidal loser seen only on (33 Down).
13. Game console that bankrupted its parent company because of hackers making free games for it.
16. The only Unix understandable by non-geeks.
18. (40 Down) likes his pages ____.
19. Do many eyes make all bugs shallow, or do too many cooks spoil the broth?
1C. Research? Linux? Software? Whatever!
20. The first step towards failure for Linux companies.
21. Every Slashdotter's duty (except those marked with (4B Across)).
22. Apple's stylish new IP theft device.
23. (43 Down)'s employer.
24. A flaky Open-Source knockoff of (38 Across).
26. ESR's birthday present to RMS.
27. This primitive operating system denies any service to its users.
29. Unique index for a particular piece of babble.
2C. A tasty breakfast treat -- down your pants!
2E. You hit this once you get 50 karma points.
2F. This marketing guy troll sure is dumb!
33. This site is decidedly not Slashdot.
34. An easy way to lose all your karma is to offer your account for sale on this popular auction site.
35. Unfortunately, this famous online Nazi's treatment of the Censorware Project [sethf.com] wasn't just a game.
36. Two-letter country code for the 51st state.
37. A geek's computer is always __.
39. ____, Lover, Aesthete, Programmer. There is no contradiction.
3A. The XP makes it go faster!
3E. The world's worst operating system!
40. The only troll with a freaks list longer than JonKatz'.
41. The OS all the cool people use now that Linux isn't trendy anymore.
43. A top-flight IT consultant who somehow manages to find time in his busy schedule to post to Slashdot.
45. What comes after as(1) and before strip(1) in the C build process.
47. VA Software has the world's worst ___.
48. This Senate bill comes closer to passing every time you go to see Lord of the Rings again.
4A. Legalized child pornography.
4F. What the Greeks went to Delphi for, Geeks go to this state for.
51. The Hellmouth should've eaten you here.
53. This rocker's battle against file-sharing networks won't end until he can Kill 'Em All.
5A. This desktop environment kicks KDE's ass!
5B. This modest and self-effacing troll was one of the first on Slashdot.
5C. You'd have to think different to justify spending money on this company's overpriced products.
5D. A game console which thought it was a full-featured computer system.
5E. Cofounder of Chips 'n' Dips.
5F. It may not have the best sound quality, but at least it's better than Ogg Vorbis.
60. Preface for the 10% of Slashdot comments not prefaced with (3D Across).
63. Apple stole all their ideas from this research group.
64. Bye bye, miss USian ___, drove the Cruiser like some loser who starts posts with a *sigh* ...
65. A dynamically updated list of the biggest losers on Slashdot.
67. Standard programming language implemented by most high-end printers.
6F. This language's lack of bounds checking is responsible for 90% of software security holes out there.

fin

Now's your chance to see just how well you've been paying attention during the past four years of chips, dips, Micro$loth, Napster, IPOs, BSD, rights online, editor censorship, and of course Linux, Linux, Linux! Complete the following professional-quality crossword puzzle chock full of trivia on Slashdot, Open Source, and geekiness in general for not only posterity but GREAT PRIZES!! Prizes include the following:

A fresh box of QUAKER GRITS !
Your very own SLASHDOT CRUISER !
A hot date with NATALIE PORTMAN !
A genuine VA Lin^H^H^HSOFTWARE STOCK CERTIFICATE !

It doesn't get much better than this, folks! Here's how to play:

Fill in the crossword completely. No incomplete (or incorrect) solutions will be considered.
Once you're sure you have the crossword completely figured out, submit it to slashdot_crossword at engineer.com. If you indeed have the solution, one of the above four prizes are yours! The prizes are in limited supply (well, except for the VA stock certificates), so get those solutions in early!
The winners will be announced on 2002/04/28, to be praised in -1 crapfloods for all eternity (or at least until the crapflooders get bored and go back to posting gay Slashdot editor fanfics).

While we fully assert that this crossword is professional quality, there are of course some variations from the standard crossword form to make things more interesting for the Slashdot crowd. Some answers are used more than once. Digits (0-9) exist in some answers. Some clues are repeated with different answers. Many of the answers are acronyms or initialisms; if the answer that comes to mind doesn't fit, try thinking of common abbreviations for it. And, of course, the crossword indices are all in hexadecimal (this is Slashdot, after all!)

So, without further ado, here comes the crossword! Plain HTML is admittedly ugly and unpleasant to look at, so you may download and print a nice PDF version here. Good luck!

+-+- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +-+- +
|1 |2 |3 |4 |##|5 |6 |##|7 | |8 |##|9 |##|0a| |0b|0c|##|0d|
+-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+-+- +- +- +- +-+- +- +-+- +
|0e| | | |##|0f| |10| |##| |##|11| | |##|12| |13| |
+-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +- +-+-+- +- +- + +- +- +-+- +
| |##|##| |##|14| | | |##|15|16| |##| |##|17| | | |
+- +- - +- +- +-+-+- +- +- +- - +- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +
|##|18| | |19|##|##|1a| |1b| | |##|##|##|1c|####|##| |
+- +- +-+- +- +- +- - +- +- +- +-+-+- +- +- +- +- +-+- +
|1d| |##|##| |##|1e| | | |##|1f|20|21|22| |23|##|24|##|
+ +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- - +- +- +-+- +- +-+- +
|##|25|26|27| |##|##| |##|28|29|##|2a| | |##|2b|2c| |##|
+- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +- +-+
|##|2d| | |##|2e|2f|##|##|30| | | |##| |##|31| | |##|
+- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +-+- +
|##|##|##|32| | | |##|##|##| |##|##|33| |34|##| |##|##|
+-+- +- +- +- ++- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- + + +- +- +-+- +
|35|36|37|##|##|38| |39|##|3a|##|##|3b| |##| |##|3c| | |
+-+-+- +- +- ++- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- - +- +- +- + +- +
|3d| | | |3e|##|##|3f| | |##|40|##|##|41| | | |##|##|
+-+- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +-+- +- +- + - +- +- + +-+- +
| |##|##|##|42| |43| |##|44| | |45| | | |##|46|47|48|
+- +- - +- + +- +- +-+- +- +- + +- +- +-+- +- +- +-+- +
|49|4a| | | |##|4b| | | |##|4c| |##| |##|##|4d| | |
+- +- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- + +- +
|##| |##|##| |##| |##|##|4e|4f| |##|50| |51|##|52| | |
+-+- +- + +- +-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- + +- +- + +- +- +
|53| | | | |##| |##|54| | | | |##|55| | |##|##| |
+- +- +-+- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +- + +- +
|56| |##|##|##|57| | |##|##|##| |##|##| |##|##|##|58| |
+- +- +- - +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +
|59| |##|##|##|##| |##|5a| |5b|##|##|5c| |5d|##|5e|##| |
+- +- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- - +- +- +-+- +
| |##|##|5f| |60| |##| |##| |##|61| |##|62|63| | |##|
+- +- +- + +- +- +- +- +- - +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +
|##|64| | |##| |##|65| | | |##|##| |##|66| | |##|##|
+- +-+- +- +- +- - +- +- +- +- +-+-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +
|67| |##|68| | |##|69| |##|6a| | | |##|6b| | | |##|
+- +- +-+- +- +- +- + +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- +- +- +-+- +
|6c| | |##|##| |##|6d| | | |##|##|6e| | | | |##|6f|
+-+- +- +- +- +- +-+ +- +- +- +- +- +- +-+- +- +- +- +-+

THE CLUES:

Across
1. This band must've been desperate for publicity to give an interview to Slashdot!
5. Crapflooder impersonated well by Silicon Simian.
7. A special treat you earn for Bad Posting.
0A. Sean Kelly's ex-lover and former SlashNET IRCop.
0E. Ew! Between the eyes!
0F. This dog won't mess your carpet, shed fur all over the place, or do much else besides consume batteries.
11. Living proof that you get what you pay for.
12. The soundtrack for the World Wide Web.
14. Disney makes money to destroy free speech on the Internet every time you buy ____ on DVD.
15. Slashcode's overglorified killfile.
17. You were writing FOX about "The Tick" when you should've been writing your congressman about this bill.
18. A very Snotty troll.
1A. This young Afghan loves watching movies and JonKatz on his C64.
1D. The best text editor EVER!
1E. What you say!! If you say it one more time, I'll bludgeon you to death!
1F. These guys gave Linux mono.
25. These shiny discs feed money into a bloated media cartel and stifle fair use rights, but you buy them by the millions anyway.
28. Slashdot's top comment poster and story submitter.
2A. These networks "disrupt" artists' cash flows.
2B. Open Source codeword for amphetamines.
2D. RAM type optimized for Extended Data Output on old Pentiums.
2E. Hillary Rosen knows you're just itching to steal Charley Pride's __.
30. A hack to get a kernel designed only to boot off floppy disks to boot off a hard drive.
31. ___ BREAK HEAD WITH OPEN-SOURCE CD!!!
32. Marketers who resort to this tactic are worse than Hitler and should be tortured and killed.
33. This desktop environment kicks GNOME's ass!
35. Microsoft sold off this Unix, and it's gone downhill ever since.
38. An essential e-mail utility for child pornographers and terrorists.
3B. (0A Down)'s lucky number.
3C. It's not Unix, and it shows.
3D. Preface for 90% of Slashdot comments, and 100% of CmdrTaco's personal ads.
3F. Where non-free software goes on your file system.
41. You better mark all the comments as ____ in metamod unless you want to lose karma.
42. This international standards body, no matter what you may think, does NOT read Slashdot.
44. Head bitch of the RIAA.
46. A primitive chat program superseded by AOL Instant Messenger.
49. An online webzine which demonstrated that online subscriptions don't work to everybody except CmdrTaco.
4B. If you moderate in a way CmdrTaco doesn't like, you earn this special database flag.
4C. vi does a poor job of emulating this standard Unix text editor.
4D. To B or not __ _.
4E. You won't get much use out of this text-recognition technology if all you use your scanner for is scanning your ass.
50. The sound Michael's head makes when he's stuffing it up his rectum.
52. Unique index for a whole LIST of babble.
53. The world's best operating system!
54. Father of Methuselah, or old-school Slashdot troll.
55. You don't need to be a Kreskin to predict this operating system's future.
56. Most geeks sleep through this half of the day.
57. This open-source man was Natalie's first.
58. Carly's mission is to steer this company into the ground.
59. mimbleton's favorite subject prefix.
5A. Chewing this might help your babbling problem.
5C. Programming language named after Lord Byron's daughter.
5F. Dead drummer for CmdrTaco's favorite band, or ridiculous Liberal myth.
61. Every Slashdotter's dream is to get one of these.
62. The Firm that is spelling Armageddon for free speech on The Net.
64. These networks are the beginning of Disorganized Crime.
65. Shitty "bitch band" whose leader likes to bitch about the RIAA.
66. The only Adequacy editor with a real PhD.
67. I think 7 over 22 is both backwards AND wrong.
68. Mentioning this droid (and others) is what is keeping you from getting laid.
69. Two-letter country code for Oman.
6A. Giving a ____ Necklace involves "coming" on Heidi Wall's bosom.
6B. What people who can't afford Visual Studio use to search text files.
6C. This hacker tool is often used to replace "characters" in "strings".
6D. QueenTaco's maiden name.
6E. The best text editor EVER!
6F. The PDP-11 assembler that thinks it's a programming language.

Down
1. Taco thinks that a purchase of his publicly traded company's services is a ___.
2. The self-centered Windows 9x release after 98SE.
3. 3D Tamagotchi game designed by Peter Molyneux.
4. A crippled Photoshop wannabe.
5. Lock your penis bird in a cage to protect it from this text-outputting animal.
6. Russian Geeks in Space.
7. If your karma surpasses 25, you have this and a problem.
8. Luckily, michael was born too late to join THIS party.
9. If this Slashdot section's color scheme doesn't drive you away, Michael's snotty editorial remarks will.
0A. Suffering cerebral palsy didn't stop him from becoming Surprised by Wealth.
0B. The market leader in megahertz lies.
0C. Statement used to declare variables in Visual Basic.
0D. Media cartel dedicated to protecting Britney Spears from dirty hackers.
10. Once the greatest Karma Whore ever, now a suicidal loser seen only on (33 Down).
13. Game console that bankrupted its parent company because of hackers making free games for it.
16. The only Unix understandable by non-geeks.
18. (40 Down) likes his pages ____.
1C. Research? Linux? Software? Whatever!
20. The first step towards failure for Linux companies.
21. Every Slashdotter's duty (except those marked with (4B Across)).
22. Apple's stylish new IP theft device.
23. (43 Down)'s employer.
24. A flaky Open-Source knockoff of (38 Across).
26. ESR's birthday present to RMS.
27. This primitive operating system denies any service to its users.
29. Unique index for a particular piece of babble.
2C. A tasty breakfast treat -- down your pants!
2E. You hit this once you get 50 karma points.
2F. This marketing guy troll sure is dumb!
33. This site is decidedly not Slashdot.
34. An easy way to lose all your karma is to offer your account for sale on this popular auction site.
35. Unfortunately, this famous online Nazi's treatment of the Censorware Project wasn't just a game.
36. Two-letter country code for the 51st state.
37. A geek's computer is always __.
39. ____, Lover, Aesthete, Programmer. There is no contradiction.
3A. The XP makes it go faster!
3E. The world's worst operating system!
40. The only troll with a freaks list longer than JonKatz'.
41. The OS all the cool people use now that Linux isn't trendy anymore.
43. A top-flight IT consultant who somehow manages to find time in his busy schedule to post to Slashdot.
45. What comes after as(1) and before strip(1) in the C build process.
47. VA Software has the world's worst ___.
48. This Senate bill comes closer to passing every time you go to see Lord of the Rings again.
4A. Legalized child pornography.
4F. What the Greeks went to Delphi for, Geeks go to this state for.
51. The Hellmouth should've eaten you here.
53. This rocker's battle against file-sharing networks won't end until he can Kill 'Em All.
5A. This desktop environment kicks KDE's ass!
5B. This modest and self-effacing troll was one of the first on Slashdot.
5C. You'd have to think different to justify spending money on this company's overpriced products.
5D. A game console which thought it was a full-featured computer system.
5E. Cofounder of Chips 'n' Dips.
5F. It may not have the best sound quality, but at least it's better than Ogg Vorbis.
60. Preface for the 10% of Slashdot comments not prefaced with (3D Across).
64. Bye bye, miss USian ___, drove the Cruiser like some loser who starts posts with a *sigh* ...
65. A dynamically updated list of the biggest losers on Slashdot.
67. Standard programming language implemented by most high-end printers.
6F. This language's lack of bounds checking is responsible for 90% of software security holes out there.

fin

It appears that his company is none other than VA Software. Is it any wonder that they don't stand a chance of profitability?

Which is IIS -- Ice Cream, or Adult Novelty? (Maybe both.)

It's sort of ironic that the company formerly known as "VA Linux" now has a job opening available for an "IT Senior Microsoft Server Administrator". How things change!

Your posts, while maybe interesting from time to time, are not really that artistic. The real art is keeping things running with all the whiners, trolls and crapfloods going on.[/suckup]

we already know the answer to that one

Join VA Linux today!

You bet it is.

Tech boom?

First thing I'd do to investigate this "tech boom" is look inward. Yeah, the company that you are employed by.
If they anticipate a tech boom, then why bring in the "giant ads" or this??

Can I get links next time? Cause I know you are just quoting stock brokers (that trade tech stocks). They need you to start buying tech again....

Rob Owens, a tech industry analyst at Pacific Crest Securities
Owens and other analysts point to these factors

Yeah, these analysts need your income. They can come up with stats till there blue in the face, but tech companies aren't employing. You will need employees for a boom, right? Well, as soon as I see these tech companies hiring like wildfire, I'll still be worried if I have a job tomorrow...

jamie@slashdot.org
malda@slashdot.org
brian@tangent.org
sales@vasoftware.com
support@vasoftware.com
info@vasoftware.com
info@valinux.co.jp
pfossenier@vasoftware.com
jobs@vasoftware.com
eureka@vasoftware.com
mkramer@vasoftware.com
Fix that page widening bug for christs sakes!

jamie@slashdot.org
malda@slashdot.org
brian@tangent.org
sales@vasoftware.com
support@vasoftware.com
info@vasoftware.com
info@valinux.co.jp
pfossenier@vasoftware.com
jobs@vasoftware.com
eureka@vasoftware.com
mkramer@vasoftware.com
Fix that page widening bug for christs sakes!

jamie@slashdot.org
malda@slashdot.org
brian@tangent.org
sales@vasoftware.com
support@vasoftware.com
info@vasoftware.com
info@valinux.co.jp
pfossenier@vasoftware.com
jobs@vasoftware.com
eureka@vasoftware.com
mkramer@vasoftware.com
Fix that page widening bug for christs sakes!

jamie@slashdot.org
malda@slashdot.org
brian@tangent.org
sales@vasoftware.com
support@vasoftware.com
info@vasoftware.com
info@valinux.co.jp
pfossenier@vasoftware.com
jobs@vasoftware.com
eureka@vasoftware.com
mkramer@vasoftware.com
Fix that page widening bug for christs sakes!

jamie@slashdot.org
malda@slashdot.org
brian@tangent.org
sales@vasoftware.com
support@vasoftware.com
info@vasoftware.com
info@valinux.co.jp
pfossenier@vasoftware.com
jobs@vasoftware.com
eureka@vasoftware.com
mkramer@vasoftware.com
Fix that page widening bug for christs sakes!

jamie@slashdot.org
malda@slashdot.org
brian@tangent.org
sales@vasoftware.com
support@vasoftware.com
info@vasoftware.com
info@valinux.co.jp
pfossenier@vasoftware.com
jobs@vasoftware.com
eureka@vasoftware.com
mkramer@vasoftware.com
Fix that page widening bug for christs sakes!

jamie@slashdot.org
malda@slashdot.org
brian@tangent.org
sales@vasoftware.com
support@vasoftware.com
info@vasoftware.com
info@valinux.co.jp
pfossenier@vasoftware.com
jobs@vasoftware.com
eureka@vasoftware.com
mkramer@vasoftware.com
Fix that page widening bug for christs sakes!

I know this sounds corny, being said on a VA property such as Slashdot, but SourceForge 3.0 is easily the best concurrent development environment i have ever used. It was my love for Sourceforge which made me pursue a job at VA Software in the first place! The fully web-based administration hides all the niggling details of commandline cvs tools and makes managing huge projects a piece of cake.

In short, if you haven't been to VA Software's site, you don't know what you're missing.

I know this sounds corny, being said on a VA property such as Slashdot, but SourceForge 3.0 is easily the best concurrent development environment i have ever used. It was my love for Sourceforge which made me pursue a job at VA Software in the first place! The fully web-based administration hides all the niggling details of commandline cvs tools and makes managing huge projects a piece of cake.

In short, if you haven't been to VA Software's site, you don't know what you're missing.

When you have a crime to investigate, and you have no suspects, where do you start? Obviously you begin by looking at the person or persons who have the most to gain by perpetrating the crime.

This is why we must consider: who had something to gain from the disasterous crimes of September 11th? Obviously not Osama Bin Laden, who would net no financial windfall from the destruction of the World Trade Center and the Pentagon. Although he has loudly applauded the "terrorist" acts of September 11th and even tacitly taken credit for them, there is no reason to believe that he is anything more than a bandwagon jumper. Being blamed for the destruction of the World Trade Center has done more for his image than any amount of militant Islamic rhetoric.

But if not Bin Laden, then who?

It so happens that on December 11th, "coincidentally" 2 months after the tragedy, Credit Suisse First Boston quietly agreed to pay out US$100 million in order to settle an 18 month old investigation into its handling of certain high-profile technology IPOs (Initial Public Offerings). One of the most controversial amongst these being the IPO of VA Linux Systems, Inc. (LNUX) .

VA Linux Systems, Inc., now known as VA Software, is widely derided as a poster child of the dot-com bust, though inexplicably still in business. At the time of the IPO, VA Linux (Software) shares opened trading at nearly 10 times their $30 offer price, closing the first day of trading at $239.25. This meteoric rise made many early investors rich, strangely on account of a company which purports to sell a hobbyist operating system which can be obtained for free on the Internet. "The VA Linux initial public offering is a prime example of market manipulation in an IPO by investment banks, their customers and the issuing firm," said Steven Schulman, a partner in the law firm Milberg Weiss Bershad Hynes & Lerach, which specializes in filing shareholder suits.

"Because certain favored customers of the investment banks agreed to buy shares in a new issue at inflated prices in the aftermarket (in return for getting an allocation of the shares at the initial offering price) the share prices to which the IPO eventually soared were actually driven by artificial market forces," continues Schulman.

But what does the VA Software (Linux) IPO have to do with the attacks on September 11th, and what has that to do with the Credit Suisse settlement? Well, considering that VA Linux (Software) got CSFB into trouble in the first place, it stands to reason that the VA Linux (Software) Board of Directors were complicit in the stock fraud from beginning to end. As the investigation progressed against CSFB, the unscrupulous VA Software/Linux executives, their pockets bulging with filthy lucre plundered from trusting, hard-working investors, must have realized that their days in the country club were numbered if the SEC discovered their wrongdoings.

The SEC, or Securities Exchange Commission, is a federal regulatory agency, and cannot be bribed. Therefore, with a possible stint in federal prison looming large, Larry Augustin and the rest of the crooks, including outspoken gun violence advocate Eric S. Raymond, decided to undertake more active means to halt the investigation.

The Plan

It so happened that all the evidence in the CSFB/VA Linux investigation was held at the SEC Northeast Regional Office in Manhattan. More specifically, 7 World Trade Center, Suite 1300. The board decided that a simple burglary or arson attempt would not be satisfactory to destroy the evidence; anything so simple had a significant chance of being botched, and regardless of success would leave too many witnesses or living accomplices.

It was then that Eric S. Raymond suggested something he had read in a book by Tom Clancy. Crashing two planes into the World Trade Center Plaza would guarantee the destruction of the SEC offices, killing the operatives and possibly a number of SEC investigators at the same time. The plan seemed flawless, and would cost little more than the price of a few plane tickets. In a secret session, the board voted unanimously in favour of Eric's suggestion, and began to put it into action.

VA Software/Linux, at the time of planning the attacks, had no shortage of H1-B visa workers, who they employed for the purpose of writing and improving hacking, encryption, and other terrorist tools for the Linux operating system. It had been decided that a hand-picked few of these foreign H1-B workers would be used as the "patsies" in the operation. A contest was held, and the most zealotous Linux advocates were chosen for this secret assignment, direct from the board of directors. They accepted their mission after being told that, if successful, it would guarantee the adoption of Linux in the desktop market.

Alan Cox was brought into the fold to provide some planning and logistics for the mission. It was he who determined that since there was no adequate flight simulator software for Linux, the patsies would need to train at a flight school in order to pull off the plan successfully. It was also his idea to hijack a third and fourth plane for the purpose of crashing them into Washington D.C., to express his extreme rage over the DMCA, or Digital Millenium Copyright Act. The board of directors agreed with this addition to the plan in the hopes that it would help divert attention from the purpose of the WTC attack.

The H1-B workers were given false identities by using Linux hacking tools. Once they had attended the necessary flight training, they stayed at the Massachusetts home of Richard M. Stallman for a brief "faith building" retreat. During this time spent at the house of Stallman, between the nauseating stench of patchouli, Stallman's incessant, pitiful recorder playing, and Stallman's droning seminars on the grammatical and syntactical accuracy of various statements by Microsoft representatives, the H1-B workers were effectively hypnotized to the point that they were ready to lay down their lives for Free Software. It was then that they departed for Boston's Logan International Airport to board the planes.

(The preceding inside information has been obtained from a credible source close to the VA Linux/Software Board of Directors. He/she is in hiding for obvious reasons in light of this damning evidence, but has presented hard, physical evidence of VA Software/Linux's complicity in the events of 9/11 to federal investigators.)

From the annals of the Troll Library .

That's a good point Matt.

Is there an alternative service to Sourceforge (free or otherwise) that does the same thing? Anyone know where people would go if SF goes tits up?

I also wonder how much they make from their shrink-wrapped product? Anyone know of organizations that are buying this?

E.

BTW. Matt: Streamsicle looks cool, are you aware that the web-installer craps out on Mandrake 8.1? I guess you get what you pay for.

Some of my former co-workers with whom I have kept in touch have been consulting lawyers in the area in the hopes of "demonstrating" that the vibrating controllers and other ergonomic no-nos committed in our workplace are grounds for getting some quick cash through the legal system. Because of the very nature of this sort of damage - that it is very difficult to prove whether or not somebody is feeling pain in their arm - they believe that it will be an open-and-shut case and that most companies will want to settle quickly to avoid further damage to stock prices and profits.

I don't wholehartedly condone this sort of behavior, but some companies have such an atrocious employee relations record that they almost deserve the misery...

will

found one!

I'm not sure if this was meant to be a troll, or if you are just misinformed, but your post contains a number of glaring errors, which I feel I must clear up.

First of all, "GPL" does not stand for "Gnu Protective License," as you suggest. In fact, it stands for "Grand Prince of Liceses." When Red Hat finished writing Linux, they quickly realized that their operating system was vastly superior to all others available, and decided to come up with a license to guarantee that it would ascend the thrown. Hence, the GPL.

Secondly, I think that you and your lawyers have misread the GPL. While it is true that you must release source for any products compiled with GPL tools, in fact the GPL goes further. Anyone who has ever looked at the source of a GPL-licensed program must release source (under what is known as a "GPL-compatible license") for all software he or she writes after that point.

Now, this may seem a little harsh to you, but, try to look at it from Red Hat's perspective. They wrote the greatest operating system ever. And they made it freely available for you to look at. Now, if you take and reuse their brilliant ideas, isn't that theft of their intellectual property? And, how are they to know that you're not reusing their ideas if you don't release your source?

In any case, I trust that your company will quickly comply with the terms of the GPL, and begin releasing source immediately. Fortunately, a Red Hat subsidiary named VA Software has a website called SourceForge.net that will help you to comply with the GPL by providing project hosting, version control, bug and issue tracking, project management, backups and archives, and communication and collaboration resources for open source projects.

• The manufacturers have a nonexistent economic incentive to give away their work for free. If you look at it from their viewpoint, you will see that the best they can do is to not lose money from the proposition.
• Most software houses have licensed proprietary pieces of code or business processes from other companies, and they did not pay for the right of unlimited distribution. A vendor notorious for continuing this practice, then blaming the fact that its main product is still completely closed source, is Sun.
• Companies know that they can quickly gain popularity amongst open source supporters by releasing their code, so this often provides an impetus as it could lead to better sales for newer products from the resultant goodwill.
• Giving old products away to the general public has certain specific and often harmful tax consequences. Effectively the companies are declaring the value of their goods to be zero, which keeps them from using the standard 20-year depreciation chart to deal with unsold inventory. In a nutshell, this means that there are huge tax benefits to not releasing old software as open source.
• And lastly, code reuse is rampant because of the short development cycle of most games. I have seen code from Apple II games from 1987 show up in brand new product releases in 2001. Giving your code away gives your competitors an edge, and nobody wants to do that.

uncle isaac

Of course this site will be in that museum six months from now.