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So, HP, What Exactly Are You Trying To Sell Us?

billtom writes "There's an article over at c|net news where the normally fawning technology business press actually takes an HP VP to task for the extremely vague statements that usually surround enterprise software 'products.' With some gems like 'That could be boilerplate applying to any company,' and 'But again, how does that differ from what's been around?' and 'But hasn't that always been the goal?'" I'd like to see Charles Cooper interview whoever came up with .Net, too.

312 comments

  1. Marketsp'aek by dolo666 · · Score: 5, Interesting

    I think the companies that bought into the Internet era blitz in the 90's, all thought there was a magic bullet that could rocket them to the future. The problem is, that they, like everyone else, were duped into buying hype that was based around nothing more than shallow promises of a better today.

    The jargon coming from HP, is to try and market to company types with buying power, to give them a new slogan or saying that could be used to grab onto and use in the office, so that they don't have to do any work.

    Scott Adams' Dilbert cartoon captures the reality of what's going on today. Executives would rather appear to be working, than actually working, so they invent new descriptions of what they are doing that sound really busy!

    I think the best slogan is hard work, but nobody likes hard work, unless someone else is doing it.

    From the article: "I define AE as a business strategy for customers who want to respond in real time to changes affecting their business."

    Translation: We know your business operates in something called time. Time is money. We want money, so therefore we will trade you your own time for money. We accomplish this by selling you your own time back, but we change it to something called real-time. Or ideally I have no idea what those geeks in research have come up with and it's not my job to know, so I'll just make something up and hope you bite. Besides, none of the marketing based people will understand what they came up with anyway, so who cares?

    1. Re:Marketsp'aek by pegr · · Score: 5, Funny

      Reminds me of the classic joke:

      Q: What's the difference between a used car salesman and a computer salesman?

      A: The used car salesman KNOWS when he's lieing to you!

    2. Re:Marketsp'aek by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Insightful

      I think they are trying to do what IBM is doing. If you think of the climate today, all companies are trying to shed costs and stop spending. When I see the IBM adds it makes me feel as if to accomplish the goals of becoming profitable in a recession I must keep purchasing enterprise level hardware and software. To some part that is true. As an engineer I know when IT departments make poor choices due to budget contraints because they have no money to spend. As a consumer I do the same. I may choose to hold off buying new tires today for another month. In my persoanl life that is acceptable. In a professional world somethimes you have to spend regardless of freezes on bugets. There are are no other ways to succeedd at a plan unless you add to your infastructure. I think that is the point that IBM is trying to drive home. Even though you are tight you still have to remeber you must spend money to make it.

      Chris

    3. Re:Marketsp'aek by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Interesting

      FWIW, since the merger with Compaq several rounds of layoffs have occurred. HP'ers appear to have taken the brunt of the layoffs, and middle management is now largely composed of people from the Compaq side of things. It appears that the corporate culture they bring with them emphasizes the more evil aspects of sales and marketing. The focus is less on meeting customers' needs, and more on doing whatever it takes to hit revenue targets.

      The Bill and Dave show is over; HP fans can all go home.

    4. Re:Marketsp'aek by cgenman · · Score: 2, Interesting

      Despite all of the jargon, when Nora Denzel was cornered and forced to respond intelligently, she did.

      She said, in essence, that HP will help you automate everything, and will do so in such a way that you can still change things. She cited a real-world reason to do so, and how it saved money.

      Is it revolutionary? No... And she did back off from admitting as such. But it is useful, and it is how IT is supposed to be done. She might not know exactly how the technology is implemented, but she knows what it does.

      Good show. Do that more often.

    5. Re:Marketsp'aek by Frymaster · · Score: 3, Insightful
      espite all of the jargon, when Nora Denzel was cornered and forced to respond intelligently

      this is at the core of what's wrong with buzzwords. they start as meaningful and then get hijacked by the marketing department and media and are bled dry of all content.

      witness "enterprise". back in the day of "client server" computing it was realized that there were environments that were so big that each server was the client of other servers and the peer to yet more. clusters of lans in wans that were themselves clustered. do describe the feudal structure that was built to accomodate this size and complexity of network, we came up with a word: enterprise.

      of course, marketing realized that since enterprise-class products were the most expensive they should really work at making sure everybody felt they had to have them. a buzzword got born by the appropriation of a valid term and now i can buy an "enterprise desktop" solution for numerous products. "enterprise desktop"? what the hell is that? marketing, m'lad, marketing.

      anyway. glad to see someone call the sales team on their buzzwordery. if we want to protect the meaning of our tech descriptions we'll have to fight the sales team for them - or stick to six-letter acronyms that they won't want (call the vpn the "iskampd" box fr instance)

    6. Re:Marketsp'aek by I8TheWorm · · Score: 1

      Too true. As a matter of fact, he responded with that specific answer twice, and vaguely a few times. Just another guy in white shoes and matching belt that left his chin out for ths reporter.

      It was an enjoyable read, simply because I hate the white shoe types.

      --
      Saying Android is a family of phones is akin to saying Linux is a family of PCs.
    7. Re:Marketsp'aek by pdxChris · · Score: 1
      ...they, like everyone else, were duped into buying hype that was based around nothing more than shallow promises of a better today.

      What losers! I much prefer to be duped by shallow promises of a better tomorrow.
    8. Re:Marketsp'aek by sosegumu · · Score: 5, Interesting

      Charles: ''There still seems to be confusion surrounding the topic. At the Gartner conference last month, some IT attendees said they still say they didn't understand what Carly Fiorina wanted to convey with HP's Adaptive Enterprise. Do you feel the message is unclear or needs rethinking?''

      Nora: ''I disagree that it was unclear...''

      This is the height of corporate arrogance. If someone doesn't understand an idea that has been presented to them, then it is by definition unclear . I would think that it would be the responsibility of the entity selling something to be able to clearly communicate what the product actually is and what it's benefits are.

      As far as I can tell, AE is the same thing that independent consultants have been offering for years. It's a classic case of ''The Emperor Has No Clothes,'' and the whole point of this asinine jargon that HP is using is to bully the prospective buyer into thinking that it must be far more complicated than their simple minds can handle. I almost spewed my diet cola through my nose when Nora (presumably with a straight face) said that ''you can't buy an Adaptive Enterprise.'' If you can't buy it, then how can they sell it? Whoops--better call HP and buy a 55-gallon drum of their HP Special Snake Oil to straighten it all out for us!

      Much of what I do is helping the average business owner/manager with 8 workstations understand that they don't actually need the $18,000 server that was pitched to them by some IT Barnum with a handful of glossy brochures touting ''industry-leading scalability and resource utilization.'' When they find out that their old P3 workstation with an extra hard drive, TRAVAN drive and SAMBA is up to the task of tossing 4MB data files across their peer-to-peer network, they're quite surprised.

      I quit my Fortune 500 job two years ago when I just couldn't take the idiocy anymore. True, I make half of what I used to, I work 50% more hours, and my medical benefits suck, but at least I don't have to talk to people who can't finish a sentence without using the words ''dynamic,'' ''deploy,'' ''real-time,'' or ''paradigm,'' and that makes it all worth it.

      Kudos to Charles Cooper for taking this Carly Fiorina sycophant to task. Unfortunately, if this writer keeps it up, he either won't have a job or nobody in the IT business will give him interviews.

      --
      It's easier to wear the spandex than to do the crunches. --David Lee Roth
    9. Re:Marketsp'aek by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      iskampd is seven letters dude, maybe you should stay out of the Marketing people's way...

    10. Re:Marketsp'aek by loosifer · · Score: 2, Insightful
      Despite all of the jargon, when Nora Denzel was cornered and forced to respond intelligently, she did.

      No, she didn't. She just kept saying "you need to tie the business to the resource". That's just as much gibberesh as anything else. What exactly am I supposed to tie to what? Applications to hardware? My business goals with IT expenditures? There is no such thing as "business" in this sense. Is your business your customers? Your shareholders? Your inventory? Your employees? Which of those am I tying to a resource? Which resource? If my business is services, then my business is my employees, but then, my resources are also my employees, so they're already tied.

      It's more gibberish. And her "specific" example was not specific. She gave an example of something someone did, but she didn't provide specifics on how it got done, or how that was "tying the business to the resource".

      As to automating things, no, she didn't even say that. She just basically said that HP would be willing to send lots of expensive consultings to your work to figure out how to "tie the business to the resource", but does not ever say what the heck that is, and certainly does not ever say it's automation. Companies like HP hate automation, because it leaves less room for consultants.

      *GONG* Keep trying.

    11. Re:Marketsp'aek by iion_tichy · · Score: 2, Interesting

      I think the internet makes for a much better today. I am amazed how people can not see it. But I guess we all don't have very good memories. I almost can't remember how I did things without internet access.

    12. Re:Marketsp'aek by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      A
      N
      A
      L

    13. Re:Marketsp'aek by JGski · · Score: 2, Insightful
      I actually know what there are offering, saying and trying to do, but is classic HP-marketing style they've flubbed the communication badly - used be they would flub marketing by being overly technical, yet correct ("HP would market sushi as cold, dead fish"). Now it appears that they are flubbing by over-MBA-ing, or more specifically, over-Operations-Research-ing their marketing. It may communicate with some MBAs but most techies won't have a clue. There isn't some specific technology that will give you an "adaptive enterprise". Even worse, most of what they are propose won't really do the job. However the vagueness is somewhat justified because what keeps most companies from being adaptive to changing market environments isn't technical or even financial, but rather sociological and psychological (how's that for mumbo-jumbo - but it's true).

      As a 10-year ex-HPer I'm still dissapponted that they've abandon "HP as technology company" and now have embraced "HP as a supply chain consultant". Unfortunately, supply chain management will only get commodified, and quickly. It's an unsustainable business strategy. But I've also come to realize that certain board members and executives already knew this and are only out to line their pockets before the ship goes down.

      And, yes, I have an MBA.

      JGski

    14. Re:Marketsp'aek by Izmunuti · · Score: 1

      When I think of the "classic HP" I think of calculators and lab test equipment. That nifty technical core is now Agilent (well not the calculators, alas). It seems like the wrong company got to keep the "HP" name.

    15. Re:Marketsp'aek by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Bravo sir! You have hit the nail on the head.

      Both of my parents used to make six figure salaries at HP while their primary job was to reply to and forward e-mails around the company. This is not because they were lazy people or wanted to do this, but merely because of the way HP management "got things done." If you think >200 spam e-mails a day is bad, imagine >200 REAL e-mails a day that must all be looked over, replied to, and forwarded on to bosses and group leaders alike. Of course, now they're at Agilent and that's going down the tubes, but at least you had the courage to take the pay cut and get out with your sanity. I never could understand my parents' decisions to stay with HP, besides paycheck addiction. And yes, their two departments were Sales and Marketing.

    16. Re:Marketsp'aek by code_nerd · · Score: 1

      Sorry, but no. She was not actually doing a good job of speaking to an MBA crowd either. She was trying to sell us an old idea with a new buzzword. The idea that the business should drive projects, and that there may an IT component to a business project, is as old as computing. Sensible companies have always realized this and operated their IT departments accordingly. Trying to repackage ROI and systems integration as "adaptive computing" is just sound and fury, signifying nothing. Any MBAs she is "communicating" with should be given something more important to do, like creating a new cover sheet for the TPS report.

      A better and more honest approach would be to announce that HP will now begin competing with IBM Global Services. That seems to be the upshot of all this, and IBM could sure use some competition, as their offerings stink on ice.

    17. Re:Marketsp'aek by dasmegabyte · · Score: 1

      I quit my corporate job because I like to use the words dynamic, deploy, paradigm and real-time and was tired of people looking confused because I wasn't using them to reference business practices.

      --
      Hey freaks: now you're ju
    18. Re:Marketsp'aek by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      >>This is the height of corporate arrogance. If someone doesn't understand an idea that has been presented to them, then it is by definition unclear . I would think that it would be the responsibility of the entity selling something to be able to clearly communicate what the product actually is and what it's benefits are.

      I think you're confusing two senses of the word 'unclear' -- as in something being unclear to someone and something being presented in an unclear way. The later refers to the normative sense of the word 'unclear.' If I present an idea to 50 people, objectively the presentation can be clear or unclear, regardless of how well the group of people understand the idea. For example, all 50 of them may have slept through the talk, or all 50 may have some kind of mental deficiencies that prohibit their understanding of the material. The executive was defending the objective clarity of what hp was doing, not trying to contradict the statement that some of the people at that conference didn't understand what was presented to them.

    19. Re:Marketsp'aek by sosegumu · · Score: 1

      The executive was defending the objective clarity of what hp was doing, not trying to contradict the statement that some of the people at that conference didn't understand what was presented to them.

      There still seems to be confusion surrounding the topic. At the Gartner conference last month, some IT attendees said they still say they didn't understand what Carly Fiorina wanted to convey with HP's Adaptive Enterprise. Do you feel the message is unclear or needs rethinking?

      The question that Charles asked had to do directly with the IT attendees opinion of the clarity of Carly's presentation at the Gartner conference. Nora's response was also directed at Carly's presentation because she said ''I disagree that it was [emphasis mine] unclear.'' Obviously, the past tense (preterit) must refer to past action or state. If she were referring to the ''objective clarity'' of the AE program, that hasn't changed and would be in the present tense, as in ''I disagree that it is unclear.''

      Ideally, the whole purpose of a presentation is to be clear (although I must admit that in this case I suspect that the objective may have been the opposite) and the audience is the only meaningful judge of clarity for a presentation since they were the one(s) for whom the presentation was given. For example, if I tell you, ''Yo quiero una chuleta de cerdo,'' you may or may not understand that I'm requesting a pork chop in Spanish. Of course I could give you some elitist crap about how the ''objective clarity'' of the statement is unambiguous and insinuate that it's your fault that you don't understand.

      --
      It's easier to wear the spandex than to do the crunches. --David Lee Roth
    20. Re:Marketsp'aek by mt2mb4me · · Score: 1
      More Like

      Bob: So you physicaly take the reports from the customers ?

      Tom: Well, My secretary does... or they FAX them.

      Bob: So you physicaly take the reports from the engineers ?

      Tom: Well, no.

      Bob: So what exectly do you say that you do here?

      Tom: I told you I take the God D**n Reports to the God D**n engineers. I HAVE PEOPLE SKILLS, CAN'T YOU SEE THAT!?! WHATS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE!?!

    21. Re:Marketsp'aek by tealover · · Score: 1

      Uh, next time please give proper attribution to the source material you're quoting.

      Jeeeez, some people have no morals.

      --
      -- You see, there would be these conclusions that you could jump to
    22. Re:Marketsp'aek by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0
      If someone doesn't understand an idea that has been presented to them, then it is by definition unclear.

      No, it's not. Some people are just idiots. Clarity is an abstract concept, like right or wrong, that changes over time anyway. If you made a statement about, say, computers, 50 years ago, it would probably be unclear to most people, but it might be perfectly clear today.

    23. Re:Marketsp'aek by mt2mb4me · · Score: 1

      I figured you would be able to tell it was from office space. I thought it as a pretty well known quote. When tom had a meeting with the "Bobs"

    24. Re:Marketsp'aek by mt2mb4me · · Score: 1

      I just got that. after seeing your sig

    25. Re:Marketsp'aek by TheLink · · Score: 1

      "management is now largely composed of people from the Compaq side of things. It appears that the corporate culture they bring with them emphasizes the more evil aspects of sales and marketing."

      Uh no. Doesn't anyone remember HP's espeak in the '90s? There was so much BS and marketing wrapped around the announcements that it was hard to tell what they were talking about.

      Perhaps that's it seems that no one has even mentioned it here yet.

      Good riddance anyway:
      http://h21022.www2.hp.com/SaIsapi.dll/SaS ervletEng ine.class/espeakdotnet/faq.jsp

      --
    26. Re:Marketsp'aek by McLuhanesque · · Score: 1
      Charles: "There still seems to be confusion surrounding the topic. At the Gartner conference last month, some IT attendees said they still say they didn't understand what Carly Fiorina wanted to convey with HP's Adaptive Enterprise."


      Real answer: What Carly wanted to convey is that business results are worse than ever, and that she has royally screwed up with the merger. In having everyone emphasize this "Adaptive Enterprise" bullshit, perhaps they will all be sufficiently distracted trying to figure out what the hell it really is, so that she will keep her job for at least one more year. In other words, pay no attention to the man behind the curtain, and pray that consulting revenues pick up.
    27. Re:Marketsp'aek by tealover · · Score: 1

      Hahaha, I'm glad to see that your settings allow you to see sigs. I was afraid that if you didn't see my sig that you wouldn't get the joke.

      --
      -- You see, there would be these conclusions that you could jump to
  2. Another example of HP confusion by i_want_you_to_throw_ · · Score: 2, Interesting

    HP funds the SCO Roadshow and they are also giving 24/7 support to Linux.

    Yes, HP can be confusing sometimes

    1. Re:Another example of HP confusion by Zocalo · · Score: 3, Interesting
      HP can be confusing sometimes

      So can most big companies with thier fingers in lots of pies. Take Sony - it sells music and complains about P2P and copyright issues, yet it also makes hardware that makes is very easy to infringe those same copyrights. They were also threatened with legislation by Philips, their partners in designing the CD, about selling non standard CDs with the official logo on them.

      All part of the fun and games that is big business.

      --
      UNIX? They're not even circumcised! Savages!
    2. Re:Another example of HP confusion by Jaysyn · · Score: 0

      The enemy of your enemy isn't always your friend?

      Jaysyn

      --
      There is a war going on for your mind.
    3. Re:Another example of HP confusion by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Go read up on HP. This stuff is common there, for example HP reps from different divisions go to the legislature. One argues for a bill, one argues against a bill. They call up Carly and asks what the hell they want.

    4. Re:Another example of HP confusion by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I hear HP had already committed to pay for the roadshow before this SCO fiasco began, and they felt they couldn't get out of it. They should have tried harder.

      All companies above a certain size become schizophrenic because of having different units with different goals. The group that sells OpenServer on Compaq servers to Pizza Hut probably wants to keep good relations with their VARs, even if they feel bad about Darl's psychotic episode.

  3. A plus sign by nycsubway · · Score: 3, Funny

    They're selling plus signs, in fact they're selling a whole bunch of plus signs. They seem to sell them in groups. they can catch criminals and make a guy get home from the moon.

  4. What is CNET smoking? by Fux+the+Penguin · · Score: 4, Funny
    I know, here on Slashdot we frequently harangue CNET for their decidedly pro-business anti-linux slant, but I think they erred the other way here. Having read the article, it seems pretty clear to me, that the author simply wasn't competent enough in the field to conduct the interview. Seriously, would you send a wet-behind the ears English-lit major to interview a Nobel prize winning physicist for the cover story in the "Physics Home Journal?" I'm sorry, but if you can't tell me the correlation between the eigenvector of the (sparse) matrix describing the arrangement of crystal lattice structures in a semi-solid and the mass/energy waveform coefficients, you should be out covering donkey shows, not hard science! (BTW, the eigenvector is directly proportional to the waveform's beta coefficient).

    That said, check out this gem:

    Q: Stripped of all the jargon and market-speak, can you succinctly define what Adaptive Enterprise is supposed to be about?
    A: I define AE as a business strategy for customers who want to respond in real time to changes affecting their business.
    Q: That could be boilerplate applying to any company. What's the special sauce?
    A:The secret sauce that HP brings is the ability to link business processes--which obviously are a manifestation of a company's strategy--to IT gear. The big breakthrough is when those two things are synchronized, so changes in the business environment can dynamically trigger the IT changes necessary to support that business change.

    He should never have needed to ask that twice. HP's response was clear to anyone who's been struggling to cultivate dynamic convergence in their disintermediate, yet robust, technologies.

    I work IT for one of the lower-end Fortune 500 companies (I won't mention any names, but we're the 2nd largest manufacturer of Internet-enabled personal sanitation devices in the U.S.), and we're seriously looking at HP's AE technology for our next round of upgrades. I am so tired of having to re-virtualize all our front-end functionalities every time the boss-man wants to streamline our synergistic e-services. Now, if I simply had a frictionless front-end action-item, right there in my real-time vortal (vertical portal) I'd be made.

    Anyway, Slashdotters, don't believe this CNET FUD. I think AE definitely has the potential to recontextualize the debate on revolutionary mindshare schemas.
    1. Re:What is CNET smoking? by Dehumanizer · · Score: 0

      Nice troll. For a moment I actually was convinced that you believed what you wrote. :)

      --
      The Tlog - a technology blog
    2. Re:What is CNET smoking? by mekkab · · Score: 2

      You sir, are my Internet Idol for the day (I guess that makes you an eIdol? (I would put a diarisis over the e, but /. strips out any accents.)

      I couldn't have put it better. It isn't enough to say "well, this product implements configuration management!" the issue is having the IT systems that are either in place or soon-to-be in place accurately reflect the delicate intricacies that are our living business process. Being in the embedded control field, we have a dedicated audit trail for all of our networked potable dispensers. And we need that to reflect all of our value-added reorganizations to better reflect the services we provide to our customer, in real time, or near-real time. Do you want to spend all weekend re-parameterizing the frambus? I didn't think so!

      HP+. Its made our business their business+.

      --
      In the future, I would want to not be isolated from my friends in the Space Station.
    3. Re:What is CNET smoking? by gkuz · · Score: 0
      I work IT for one of the lower-end Fortune 500 companies

      I thought you were in dental school, or law school or something. Did you graduate already?

      -1, Troll

    4. Re:What is CNET smoking? by Anonymous+Custard · · Score: 1

      Good one... send that to Scott Adams :-)

    5. Re:What is CNET smoking? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I wear many hats. I also own the 2nd largest soy sauce vending machine manufacturer in the country.

    6. Re:What is CNET smoking? by TheSpoom · · Score: 1

      HP makes us techs use PeopleSoft :^(

      --
      It's better to vote for what you want and not get it than to vote for what you don't want and get it.
      - E. Debs
    7. Re:What is CNET smoking? by gkuz · · Score: 0
      And you, Sir, can get

      -1, Dumbfuck

      for completely missing the fact it was a joke.

      Thank you for your concern. Read the guy's journal and then come back and tell me who's missing what, OK?

    8. Re:What is CNET smoking? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      > seriously looking at HP's AE technology for our next round of upgrades.

      Think twice! HP customers are not immune to SCO lawsuit, even though HP is their funding their escapades. Or are you a Windows shop?

    9. Re:What is CNET smoking? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I totally know what you mean, if I had a frictionless front-end action-item, I'd be so set right now. I mean, I could totally de-prioritize my current reports and change my primary action-item. If only I could remember to put a cover letter on my TPS reports and get this blood stain off of my collar.

    10. Re:What is CNET smoking? by Mr.+Slippery · · Score: 0

      Mildly amusing, troll, but don't you have a better way to spend your time?

      (Mods: read Fux's journal.)

      Troll, troll, go away, find a better way to play.

      --
      Tom Swiss | the infamous tms | my blog
      You cannot wash away blood with blood
    11. Re:What is CNET smoking? by pmz · · Score: 1

      Q: Stripped of all the jargon and market-speak, can you succinctly define what Adaptive Enterprise is supposed to be about?
      A: I define AE as a business strategy for customers who want to respond in real time to changes affecting their business.
      Q: That could be boilerplate applying to any company. What's the special sauce?
      A:The secret sauce that HP brings is the ability to link business processes--which obviously are a manifestation of a company's strategy--to IT gear. The big breakthrough is when those two things are synchronized, so changes in the business environment can dynamically trigger the IT changes necessary to support that business change.


      What's great about interviews like this is that they can republish it in ten years and no one will even notice. I'd bet it originally appeared in 1995 somewhere, and we're all fools for thinking that synergizing business processes and IT gear is something new. I wonder what IBM was doing all those years before the transistor...

    12. Re:What is CNET smoking? by FelixCat · · Score: 2, Funny
      I'm sorry, but if you can't tell me the correlation between the eigenvector of the (sparse) matrix describing the arrangement of crystal lattice structures in a semi-solid and the mass/energy waveform coefficients, you should be out covering donkey shows, not hard science! (BTW, the eigenvector is directly proportional to the waveform's beta coefficient).

      I'm not sure if you fully grasp the difference between eigenvectors and eigenvalues, so we will all have to cover donkey shows together.

      Do we really need that many journalists out covering donkey shows? How many donkey shows are there really?

      Then again we have something like 350 journalists all covering Kobe, why not have a few cover some donkey shows!

    13. Re:What is CNET smoking? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      mod parent up! +1 knows what the check he's talking about

    14. Re:What is CNET smoking? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      So what you're saying is that you're a ninny, then?

    15. Re:What is CNET smoking? by Andy_R · · Score: 2, Funny

      Q: That could be boilerplate applying to any company. What's the special sauce?
      A:The secret sauce that HP brings is...


      This?

      --
      A pizza of radius z and thickness a has a volume of pi z z a
    16. Re:What is CNET smoking? by pclminion · · Score: 0, Flamebait
      So now being funny via gross sarcasm is considered "trolling?" What the hell is wrong with these people? Do you actually think anyone with half a brain cell would take that seriously? It's only a troll if you're trolling, for fuck's sake.

      There's a word for people who can't distinguish parody and reality, I think it's called "idiot."

    17. Re:What is CNET smoking? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Jeez, I thought Perl was confusing to read :)

    18. Re:What is CNET smoking? by greenrd · · Score: 1
      I'd bet it originally appeared in 1995 somewhere,

      Funnily enough... look at the copyright statement at the bottom of the page...

    19. Re:What is CNET smoking? by pmz · · Score: 1


      Wow, those voices in my head were true!

    20. Re:What is CNET smoking? by Carnildo · · Score: 1

      I wish it was possible to mod someone +1 Troll.

      --
      "They redundantly repeated themselves over and over again incessantly without end ad infinitum" -- ibid.
    21. Re:What is CNET smoking? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      No, he's an "iDol".

      Don't you know anything? ;)

    22. Re:What is CNET smoking? by danila · · Score: 1

      You should not moderate a person, you should moderate their posts. I don't care about Fux's journal, but this post was obviously funny enough in the second part to not be considered troll.

      --
      Future Wiki -- If you don't think about the future, you cannot have one.
    23. Re:What is CNET smoking? by denks · · Score: 1

      but we're the 2nd largest manufacturer of Internet-enabled personal sanitation devices in the U.S

      Im obviously behind on the latest technology, but are you referring to an internet enabled toilet??

      --

      I am Monkey, the Great Sage, equal of heaven!
    24. Re:What is CNET smoking? by Boricle · · Score: 2, Funny

      Q: ...What's the special sauce? A:The secret sauce that HP.... Anybody thinking: HP Sauce. I wonder if the interviewer asked the question with this in mind. Sauce, (mostly) liquid, adapts to shape of container, starts to go off if unused... Wonder if it goes well with spam.

    25. Re:What is CNET smoking? by Wolfrider · · Score: 1

      --That's what +1 Funny is for. ;-)

      --
      .
      == WolfriderV6 == I'm willing to admit that *I just might* be wrong... Are you??
  5. They don't need to know by Cyclopedian · · Score: 0
    Indeed, earlier this year executives acknowledged that IBM's own sales force had little idea what On-Demand Computing was supposed to be about.

    Sales people don't need to know much about the product. Just have them tell PHB managers that it's enterprise stuff that will make your business "efficient" and "faster", and they'll roll in the commissions.

    Ungrateful louts, these managers.
    -Cyc

  6. Software companies and their buzzword generators. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Every software company is guilty of this. A program that does general ledger and billing sounds much sexier when called a "best-of-breed integrated calculation solution, designed to drive your business into the 21st century and beyond." And a server-monitoring tool sounds better when you call it a "proactive fault-finding and troubleshooting environment, making your data center fully autonomic and self-healing."

    It's kind of wierd for the press to actually start asking hard questions. Think tanks like Gartner et al live and die by techno-hype. The latest thing going around in CIO-land is Utility Computing, so we'll see what comes of that.

  7. See... by ambienceman · · Score: 0

    This is exactly the kind of marketing power they want. They want those jingles and catch phrases to stick in your head.

  8. Column About Unquestioning Business Press by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    On a related note, Dvorak (love him or hate him) has an recent column piece at PCMag where he rants about the poor quality of business press.

    He recommends seeking out non-USA articles as he feels they tend to be more critical.

  9. This is familiar! by Shoten · · Score: 3, Informative

    He must have gone to college with this consultant.

    --

    For your security, this post has been encrypted with ROT-13, twice.
    1. Re:This is familiar! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Modded as "+4 Informative"?! I guess it's management's day to hand out the mod points.

  10. Re:Like Slashdot postings are any better? by Dehumanizer · · Score: 1

    The funny thing is that probably all of those 5 are true... :)

    --
    The Tlog - a technology blog
  11. Utility computing by another name... by TopShelf · · Score: 4, Interesting
    All credit to this interviewer, who refused to swallow the crap this VP kept spewing (if she said "link to business process" one more time...) and focused on what HP is trying to do that's any different from Sun or IBM. Bottom line - not much!

    That said, I think utility computing is applicable only to a narrow market so far. You need compatability between various applications to host them within a single environment that shares data center resources. When I look around my company (a $1.5 billion worldwide manufacturer), for example, I see dozens of applications on several different operating systems at various versions. How does utility computing address such a heterogeneous environment?

    About the only time she made sense was at the very end:
    "The lines between business and IT are blurring. One CIO told me they don't have IT projects anymore. It's a business project with IT ramifications in it as well as others. "


    How true...
    --
    Stop by my site where I write about ERP systems & more
  12. Our people are better than your people... by telbij · · Score: 1

    So basically adaptive computing is just about managing IT resources. What differentiates it is that HP apparently doesn't have a vested interest in any specific technology (year right). They charge you for the privilege of having them tell you how to manage your IT department. I suppose if you can't find good people than it would be worth it, but in this economy?

  13. Here is their source by cyber_rigger · · Score: 1
  14. They're in Competition with Epson by damiena · · Score: 1

    What are they trying to sell?

    Tiny Flying Robots

  15. What they're really saying... by barfarf · · Score: 5, Funny

    Q: Stripped of all the jargon and market-speak, can you succinctly define what Adaptive Enterprise is supposed to be about?

    A: We proudly adapt to the needs of our enterprise: namely, the CEO, the CIO, and our board members. Screw the rest of the employees and the customers. Aside from that, we really have no idea what the heck we're talking about. We need to make up big words in long sententces to justify our existence in the company. This is the same mindset that allowed us to have fantastic ideas like merging with Compaq, laying off thousands of employees, while giving Capellas the goodbye gift that one can only dream about.

    Q: That could be boilerplate applying to any company. What's the special sauce?

    A: The special sauce is no different than what you find in Burger King. We sit around all day long whacking off in an effort to come up with this sh--.

    Q: Can't you get that by going to any reputable company out there? Sun, IBM--that's what they're about. Am I missing something here?

    A: Nope. They're all the same formula. Same sauce. Right down to the last drop.

    1. Re:What they're really saying... by Dehumanizer · · Score: 0

      Wish I could mod you up... :)

      --
      The Tlog - a technology blog
  16. This is the real gem right here: by Tokerat · · Score: 4, Funny

    I disagree that it was unclear. Adaptive Enterprise defines an entity where a company will be able to dynamically readjust to changes that affect its business.
    Soooo...like if I get a new customer I can dynamically readjust my database to reflect the changes that just affected my business? We've never had a machine that could handle SQL INSERT stetements before! What a breakthrough for HP!

    Why do they let people like this run companies, or even speak? I mean christ, MS APIs are more well-understood than that buzzword soup.
    --
    CAn'T CompreHend SARcaSm?
    1. Re:This is the real gem right here: by M.C.+Hampster · · Score: 1
      Soooo...like if I get a new customer I can dynamically readjust my database to reflect the changes that just affected my business? We've never had a machine that could handle SQL INSERT stetements before! What a breakthrough for HP!

      Yes, I'm sure that's what he was talking about. Or perhaps he might have been refering to things like:

      • Legal changes regarding to auditing of customer privacy information
      • Changes to the tax code
      • Changes to your business processes with external entities

      Now, I hate business-speak as much as the next guy, but the "gem" you quote made perfect sense. They are talking about the ability for your to change your business processes without having to modify code and recreate applications.

      Of course, the fact you were compelled to bash MS in your post should say something about your real-world exprience with developing enterprise applications.

      --
      Forget the whales - save the babies.
    2. Re:This is the real gem right here: by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I don't think the initial post contained an MS bash... I think it was 100% fact and should not have been limited to MS API's.

    3. Re:This is the real gem right here: by SillySlashdotName · · Score: 1

      OK, who let the Marketing Major in here?

      Now, I hate business-speak as much as the next guy, but the "gem" you quote made perfect sense.

      And the statement quoted is Adaptive Enterprise defines an entity where a company will be able to dynamically readjust to changes that affect its business.

      I am confused as to which part made 'perfect sense'. "Adaptive Enterprise defines (no, it LABELS) an entity (a thing, something that exists as a distinct, independent, or self-contained unit, a being or existence - Websters College Dictionary - how is this thing, being, or existence being defined by those words?) where (aha, so it is a place or a destination?) a company will be able to dynamically (non-statically) readjust (REadjust? So they have already dynamically adjusted now they are dynamically REadjusting?) to changes that affect its business."

      Sorry, but I never took MarketSpeak in college when I was going for an AS in Nursing, or when I went back for an AS in Accounting, or the time I spent working for a BS in CS/EE dual degree - just regular English. Maybe that is the handicap that is causing my confusion.

      They are talking about the ability for your [sic] to change your business processes without having to modify code and recreate applications.

      Oh!!, Ok. Now I see what you ... Wait a minute! How are they going to dynamically readjust to "legal changes reguarding to [sic] auditing of customer privacy information" that affect its business "without having to modify code and recreate applications"? And how does a company dynamically readjust to "changes to the tax code" that affect its business "without having to modify code and recreate applications"?

      Of course, the fact you were compelled to bash MS in your post should say something about your real-world exprience with developing enterprise applications.

      Now here I can agree with you. People with "real-world experience with developing enterprise applications" probably DO feel compelled to bash Microsoft - after all, what other company tries so hard to produce enterprise level applications and fails so miserably at it?

      --
      Acts of massive stupidity are almost never covered by warranty. --me.
    4. Re:This is the real gem right here: by M.C.+Hampster · · Score: 1

      OK, who let the Marketing Major in here?

      Actually, this was funny. But I am a CS major.

      Oh!!, Ok. Now I see what you ... Wait a minute! How are they going to dynamically readjust to "legal changes reguarding to [sic] auditing of customer privacy information" that affect its business "without having to modify code and recreate applications"? And how does a company dynamically readjust to "changes to the tax code" that affect its business "without having to modify code and recreate applications"?

      If you have designed your applications and architecture so that the various parts of your application are "pluggable" so to speak, you could modify the systems that handle those behaviors in a more declaritive manner, rather than in code. While this might require some modifications of code to the systems that handle those parts, it wouldn't require changes to the original application.

      Quite honestly, I'm not sure how HP is deciding to handle it's "Adaptive Enterprise" strategy, but that's how I do it.

      Now here I can agree with you. People with "real-world experience with developing enterprise applications" probably DO feel compelled to bash Microsoft - after all, what other company tries so hard to produce enterprise level applications and fails so miserably at it?

      Funny, but I have experience that says otherwise. As do many other companies.

      --
      Forget the whales - save the babies.
    5. Re:This is the real gem right here: by platypus · · Score: 1

      Oh!!, Ok. Now I see what you ... Wait a minute! How are they going to dynamically readjust to "legal changes reguarding to [sic] auditing of customer privacy information" that affect its business "without having to modify code and recreate applications"? And how does a company dynamically readjust to "changes to the tax code" that affect its business "without having to modify code and recreate applications"?

      Easy:
      MS Access and Excel

    6. Re:This is the real gem right here: by SillySlashdotName · · Score: 1

      Now here I can agree with you. People with "real-world experience with developing enterprise applications" probably DO feel compelled to bash Microsoft - after all, what other company tries so hard to produce enterprise level applications and fails so miserably at it?

      Funny, but I have experience that says otherwise. As do many other companies.


      I agree that I intended that to be a little tongue-in-cheek, but I would have to assume that none of the companies you were refering to were affected IN ANY WAY by any of the Outlook virus emails, or the SQL Server worms, or the RPC worms, or the IIS exploits, or the malicious macros in Word - nor were they inconvenienced by the patching that was required to close the security holes in either the operating system (RPC exploit), email/Outlook (any number of emailed applications that make use of Outlook running arbitrary executable files), SQL Server (didn't this hit Microsofts' network as well?), or IIS, or word, or Excel, or...

      I understood Outlook was intended to be an enterprise level application. Why doesn't it have enterprise level security?

      I also thought IIS was intended to be an enterprise level app. again, a swing and a miss.

      SQL Server? Word? Excel? Windows2000? Were they not intended and advertised as being enterprise level? Why are they not secure enough to be used at that level?

      Why are these "enterprise level applications" causing tens (hundreds?) of billions of dollars worth of damage or inconvenience to the companies using them when their security is breached?

      Maybe they do the things they were intended to do well enough to be considered useful at an enterprise level, but the things they do that they are not supposed to do remove them from that level - and render them liabilities when deployed at an enterprise level.

      --
      Acts of massive stupidity are almost never covered by warranty. --me.
    7. Re:This is the real gem right here: by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I disagree that it was unclear. Adaptive Enterprise defines an entity where a company will be able to dynamically readjust to changes that affect its business.

      A lovely statement indeed. Let's swap some words for reasonable synonyms and see what we get.

      "entity where a company will be able to" is just "a thing that lets you"

      "dynamically readjust" is to "non-statically" "alter/change" - but wait, we can't statically change something, so I guess "dynamic" is completely redundant. Let's just say "adapt"

      "to changes that affect its business" would be "according different situations".

      So, finally, we have "Adaptive Enterprise is a thing that lets you adapt according to different situations". Right, well, that's pretty specific. Isn't that just the name "Adaptive Company/Enterprise" reiterated? Why, yes, it is.

      Good to know we have highly paid VPs who can explain the details of these things.

    8. Re:This is the real gem right here: by dasmegabyte · · Score: 1

      Microsoft APIs ARE well understood. Just check out AllApis.net. Or read the documentation on msdn which is also free. Or buy any of the hundreds of books on the subject. Or ask on any of the numerous #winprog IRC channels. Or newsgroups.

      Despite Linus' FUD, there are plenty of people who know what's going on in the "Black Box" world of Windows API. They may not know the code works on a line by line basis, but there are dozens of Dan Applemans ready to tell you exactly what is going to happen to your data during and after an API call.

      --
      Hey freaks: now you're ju
    9. Re:This is the real gem right here: by Tokerat · · Score: 1

      see also: sig

      --
      CAn'T CompreHend SARcaSm?
  17. Re:Artical Summary by scrotch · · Score: 3, Insightful

    Except they didn't even make it!

    She's talking about selling advice, basicly. They'll recommend stuff, and they're not tied down to any one technology, she says. I'm sure they'll recommend HP hardware, but they'll also recommend .Net or JSEE without bias, she says.

    It sounds like a shift towards a consulting/service business model as hardware becomes a commodity. They're trying to package it like it's a Product, but when questioned, they have to say it's a Goal or a Mindset or a Process.

    It's advice. It's probably biased. And while it's probably better than what you'd get from a dozen O'reilly books at a tenth of a percent of the cost, it's not a magic box that you plug in so no one has to code anymore. It's not a secret technology that lets you turn a dial from '5 day delay' to '1 minute delay.' It's JSEE or .Net. You've still got to write it. You've still got to implement the business logic. They'll just help you figure out how to layer your hardware and your apps, I suppose. Stuff you probably should have learned in school.

  18. On .NET by M.C.+Hampster · · Score: 1, Insightful

    I'd like to see Charles Cooper interview whoever came up with .Net, too.

    I swear, this has become almost an urban legend on Slashdot. Ha, ha, .NET is vaporware and doesn't mean anything. Yeah, we get it.

    Of course, while I sit here developing both web-based and thick client applications and architecture using the .NET platform, I wonder why there has to be so much confusion about what .NET is. Whenever I get into a discussion about .NET with the Slashbots, I usually find that they have precisely zero exprience with it.

    So just remember that while you are chuckling in your parent's basement about not understanding the .NET platform, there are people out here using it to create software (and God forbid, making money too!)

    --
    Forget the whales - save the babies.
    1. Re:On .NET by NoOneInParticular · · Score: 1

      So .NET is a method to create software? And you can do web-based, thick client as well as architecture with it? Thank you for your very precise posting pinpointing exactly what novelties .NET brings to the computing world to us poor basement dwellers that don't have any experience with it. We'll sure try now.

    2. Re:On .NET by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      The big problem is that while Microsoft has came up with a concrete product (the .NET framework and platform), they have surrounded it with a bunch of marketing speak that makes it hard to figure out what it is. The fact that things like Passport and other initiatives have fallen under the ".NET banner" hasn't helped this. Just because it is hard to see the secret sauce doesn't mean that it isn't there.

      To their credit, Microsoft has realized their mistakes to some extent. At first, Windows Server 2003 was going to be called "Windows.NET Server" or something along those lines. The confusion over .NET was one of the main reasons for this change.

    3. Re:On .NET by Medievalist · · Score: 1

      Oddly enough, there are also lots of people making money and creating software without using .NET!

      Many of them aren't using OOP, Java, or "post-relational databasing" either. Or, what was the computer innovation to end all... hmmm... oh, yeah, COBOL! The "language of business", that makes you taller, more attractive to members of the opposite sex, and gets the crabgrass out of your lawn.

      It's a great mystery, but it seems that dressing up the latest incremental modification of existing paradigms with buzzwords and hype is seen as desireable by many people - particularly those who need to see whatever they are doing as the One True Way.

      "There are more fools than knaves in the world, else the knaves would not have enough to live upon." (Samuel Butler, 1612-1680)

    4. Re:On .NET by M.C.+Hampster · · Score: 1

      There is plenty of information out there regarding what the .NET platform involves. I don't think it is my job to detail it every time an editor makes some dumb one-liner to satisify the zealots.

      --
      Forget the whales - save the babies.
    5. Re:On .NET by Pov · · Score: 1

      Thanks for this post. No matter what your coding background, if you can't appreciate the sheer beauty of the way .NET works and what it has done and is doing for development, then you're either a blinded zealot or someone who needs to give it a try. It's not the answer for everything, but what is? Not admitting what a great accomplishment it is (marketing failures aside) is pure bias.

      --
      --- Don't be a player hater: I meta-mod ALL negative mods as Unfair.
    6. Re:On .NET by M.C.+Hampster · · Score: 1

      Did I say that .NET, J2EE or any other object-oriented software platform is the only way to make money in the software industry?

      I was simply saying that the idea that .NET is some sort of mystery technology is absolute bull.

      --
      Forget the whales - save the babies.
    7. Re:On .NET by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      No, but you probably believe it anyway.

    8. Re:On .NET by freejamesbrown · · Score: 1

      well said. contract flexibility has meant that i have had to program very similar solutions in perl, php, java, asp.net, asp, and even cold fusion and they're all the same at the end of the day. sure, there's differences. there are some tools that are more helpful to certain problems but they all can roughly pull the same tricks and all have their nasty hurdles.

      everybody will always be touting The Next Big Thing (tm). that's marketing. and it works. if it didn't, they wouldn't do it.

      remember, nicotine supposedly helps your memory, so hopefully you won't forget that you're likely to get lung cancer.
      m.

    9. Re:On .NET by arth1 · · Score: 1

      Of course, while I sit here developing both web-based and thick client applications and architecture using the .NET platform, I wonder why there has to be so much confusion about what .NET is. Whenever I get into a discussion about .NET with the Slashbots, I usually find that they have precisely zero exprience with it.

      So just remember that while you are chuckling in your parent's basement about not understanding the .NET platform, there are people out here using it to create software (and God forbid, making money too!)


      What, exactly, is the ".NET platform" that you mention twice, and how does it differ from .NET?
      I.e., what's the difference between .NET programming and developing using the .NET platform?
      Except getting another important-sounding buzzword in, that is?

      All I need to know about .NET is that the graphics card applet for my video card runs under .NET framework, and takes up more memory and resources than Windows itself. This is reason enough for me to switch video cards and avoid any program that requires.NET framework.

      Regards,
      --
      *Art
    10. Re:On .NET by M.C.+Hampster · · Score: 2, Informative

      What, exactly, is the ".NET platform" that you mention twice, and how does it differ from .NET? I.e., what's the difference between .NET programming and developing using the .NET platform? Except getting another important-sounding buzzword in, that is?

      So now the word "platform" is a buzzword?

      The .NET platform includes not only the CLR, but the various servies that are used frequently by .NET like IIS, MSMQ, SQL Server, and even COM+ through Enterprise Services. These are the technologies that work very well with the .NET CLR to create distributed applications (oh no, another buzzword right?)

      All I need to know about .NET is that the graphics card applet for my video card runs under .NET framework, and takes up more memory and resources than Windows itself. This is reason enough for me to switch video cards and avoid any program that requires.NET framework.

      What do you mean by "graphics card applet" exactly? Programming certain types of applications using the .NET Framework/Platform/Whatever is not a good idea. I don't pretend that .NET is the cure-all for everything. However, for creating business process type applications, it really is a great platform to work with.

      --
      Forget the whales - save the babies.
    11. Re:On .NET by Repugnant_Shit · · Score: 1

      No no no. You must have missed MS' marketing campaign. .NET now is simply a java-ish wrapper around the win32 API. When other slashdotters complain about "what the hell is dot NET" they mean MS stupid idea of calling everything .NET...Windows Server.NET, SQL Server.NET, etc. It was all about branding that got out of control, and confused a lot of people because it the term ".NET" was applied to almost *everything* MS produces.

      Now that is it out, we find it's just a development system like so many others before it.

    12. Re:On .NET by M.C.+Hampster · · Score: 3, Informative

      No no no. You must have missed MS' marketing campaign. .NET now is simply a java-ish wrapper around the win32 API.

      It did get slightly out of control, but calling .NET simply a "java-ish wrapper around the win32 API" is fairly inaccurate. Many of the class libraries do simply wrap the Win32 api, especially things like Windows Forms, but this is only a stopgap measure until the support is built into the OS.

      Also, .NET support is being built into more products like SQLServer. The ability to create stored procs in any .NET compliant language is coming soon (Yes, I know you can write stored procs in Java in DB2 and Oracle), along with other features.

      So .NET is a lot more than just the CLR and VS.NET. It is seeping into just about every Microsoft product there is. I think the marketing just came too early.

      --
      Forget the whales - save the babies.
    13. Re:On .NET by Abcd1234 · · Score: 2, Insightful

      I'd like to see Charles Cooper interview whoever came up with .Net, too.

      "I swear, this has become almost an urban legend on Slashdot. Ha, ha, .NET is vaporware and doesn't mean anything. Yeah, we get it. "

      Okay, care to explain to me how B follows A in this conversation? There is NOTHING about timothy's original comment that suggests he doesn't understand .NET, or that it's vaporware. All he was saying is that it would be interesting to see the .NET creators interviewed. Seriously, nice strawman, dude.

      Personally, I'd love to see MS taken to task over .NET. After all, Microsoft likes to market it as some sort of brilliant, magic cure-all, when it's really just a repackaging of many old concepts into a nice, pretty, buzzword-compliant package.

    14. Re:On .NET by ProtonMotiveForce · · Score: 1

      Amen, my brotha.

      Don't bother, most of these drooling nerds don't know anything about _anything_ dealing with Microsoft, and refuse to learn based on "principal".

    15. Re:On .NET by ProtonMotiveForce · · Score: 2

      Wow, good non-point. I take it you're one of those annoying folks who thinks everyting is too mainstream? You seem to be assuming that people only use .NET technologies because of the fancy buzzwords.

      Let me guess, you hate most popular music and instead tell everyone how much you love the "Screaming Frog Orgasms", "The Wicket Pence Dog Sperms", or some other fringe group that people bring up when they want to show how elevated their tastes are?

    16. Re:On .NET by lobsterGun · · Score: 1

      You seem like the right person to ask this questio, "What is .NET?"

    17. Re:On .NET by ProtonMotiveForce · · Score: 1

      Don't play dumb (or are you playing?).

      Obviously the implication in "timothy's" comment is that .NET is just a buzzword, with no real useful product. And if someone implies this, they don't understand .NET. A follows from B very nicely.

      Microsoft is a commercial entity. I'd be surprised if Microsoft didn't overhype it. It's great technology.

      A lot of stuff in computing is just a small step forward, or a joining of multiple different technologies.

      I Don't see you nerds taking AMD to task for implying that home users need a 64-bit processor, or pointing out that AMD is doing nothing new and there have been 64-bit processors for years and years.

    18. Re:On .NET by M.C.+Hampster · · Score: 1
      Okay, care to explain to me how B follows A in this conversation? There is NOTHING about timothy's original comment that suggests he doesn't understand .NET, or that it's vaporware. All he was saying is that it would be interesting to see the .NET creators interviewed. Seriously, nice strawman, dude.

      The title of the article is "So, HP, What Exactly Are You Trying To Sell Us?". There is an implication there that the details surruonding the .NET platform is simply marketting and buzzword with no real underlying product available. I hardly see myself setting up a "strawman".

      Personally, I'd love to see MS taken to task over .NET.

      There are definately things I'd like to see MS taken to task over, but probably not .NET.

      --
      Forget the whales - save the babies.
    19. Re:On .NET by M.C.+Hampster · · Score: 1

      I've already argued over this with enough people and gone through it so many times, I don't care to spend the time to detail out the .NET platform again. I would recommend you check out GotDotNet and MSDN for more info.

      --
      Forget the whales - save the babies.
    20. Re:On .NET by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      What makes you think the editors' comments ever have anything to do with satisfying anyone other than themselves? Surely it would make more sense to say "troll the massive Windows userbase that reads Slashdot" long before it would make sense to say, "to satisfy the zealots."

      I'd say the order goes:

      Personal ideological ranting

      Trolling to increase page views

      Preaching to the faithful

      So in essence you've been trolled.

      As for .NET, and more specifically the class libraries, there's remarkably little there. Since I enjoy learning new development systems, I've spent some personal time over the last few months implementing various 500

      There are obviously some performance differences from my experiences with Java, and almost all of them for the better. There are some exceptions, especially with the peformance of certain collection classes (Hashtable comes to mind) where I found that the performance was obviously worse than with Java.
      After rolling my own general Hashtable (to paraphrase jwz, "Hey, I've never done that before!") I obtained better results, but, well, that was a waste of my effort.

      I'm not surprised that there are people that develop for .NET (I mean really, it's not hard to notice the number of job openings for Senior developers for the platform), but I'm not particularly impressed by it.

    21. Re:On .NET by nelsonal · · Score: 1

      It's a label that indicates that the product in question will interact with the other .NET branded products. It's all a part of MS long term strategy to move away from the PC, and bring the advantages of Windows common application platform to other areas. When MS speaks of platform they are refering to the reason Windows makes so much stinking money, it has the advantage of running all the software, so users buy it, and developers develop for the largest user base. MS wants to take this advantage to other areas, XBoxes move it toward home entertainment, their server stuff to businesses, Stinger (was the code name might just be CE now) on mobile deveces, etc. It's just label that indicates the product works or begins to work with the common interfaces that other .NET products have some of which are win32 apis and some are new. At least that was what I picked up from an entire day meeting with division heads there.

      --
      Degaussing scares the bad magnetism out of the monitor and fills it with good karma.
    22. Re:On .NET by Captain+McCrank · · Score: 1
      Don't forget- the .Net platform encompasses C#, C++, VB and J# out-of-the-box, w/ the flexibility for developers to create languages w/ their own .Net support.

      .Net is a unified way of accessing resources across different programming languages and mediums.

      The definitions of the word paradigm:

      One that serves as a pattern or model.

      A set or list of all the inflectional forms of a word or of one of its grammatical categories: the paradigm of an irregular verb. A set of assumptions, concepts, values, and practices that constitutes a way of viewing reality for the community that shares them, especially in an intellectual discipline.

      Why is the word paradigm used so frequently? Because people can write apps that interface w/ eachother using home-grown protocols in different languages- plus have the work for both mobile devices and PCs. This is no more a buzzword than saying Linux is Open Source.

      Consider this posting a gift. I will no longer waste my time trying to explain why .Net is worth investigating. If you don't understand, you're clearly at home still practicing:

      #include

      main()

      {

      printf("Hello World");

      }

    23. Re:On .NET by Schnapple · · Score: 2, Informative
      What, exactly, is the ".NET platform" that you mention twice, and how does it differ from .NET? I.e., what's the difference between .NET programming and developing using the .NET platform?
      You could always go read my explanation
    24. Re:On .NET by TheSunborn · · Score: 1

      The source of the confusion is that at a time microsoft called all their new product .net. Even if they had nothing to do with the .net platform(That is: The runtime enviroment and services). Microsoft server 2003 were at one time called the .Net server, and the next version of MS SQL server were called the SQL .net server. After using a loft of monny on markething, Microsoft found out that calling a lot of things .net even if they had nothing to do with the .net platform were a problem, so they changed their campain. When they talk about .net they talk about the .net VM and services. But that was not the way it originally were planned.

      Sun is doing the same thing with java. Just think about javascript(Not a Sun product, but Sun did accept the use of the name javascript) and the java desktop which is just a renamed and rebranded Gnome. Nothing to do with the java language/VM.

    25. Re:On .NET by M.C.+Hampster · · Score: 1

      Actually, since Windows Server 2003 and the next version of SQL Server include greatly expanded support for hosting .NET applications, I wouldn't say that have "nothing to do with the .NET platform".

      It may not have been a good decision to market them that way, but it isn't that confusing.

      --
      Forget the whales - save the babies.
    26. Re:On .NET by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Don't forget- the .Net platform encompasses C#, C++, VB and J# out-of-the-box

      And out of that only C# and VB# are especially useful. Managed C++ is nasty, and there sure is a lot of point to J#.

      w/ the flexibility for developers to create languages w/ their own .Net support.

      You can provide an IL generator for a language that matches one-to-one with the CLR object model. When you write a compiler for a language that doesn't conform to the CLR object model, though, you immediately come into interoperability problems. The SML.NET compiler cannot export SML-only types, using Eiffel.NET components requires clumsy construction techniques,

  19. Does Nora Denzel even know what AE is? by FearUncertaintyDoubt · · Score: 1

    I know parrots who could explain things better.

    Q: Stripped of all the jargon and market-speak, can you succinctly define what Adaptive Enterprise is supposed to be about?
    A: I define AE as a business strategy for customers who want to respond in real time to changes affecting their business.

    So what is it?
    It's a business strategy for customers who want to respond in real time to their businesses. The secret is when you link the business processes together to your IT gear, then you can automatically roll those changes through and respond.

    Do you feel the message is unclear or needs rethinking?
    I disagree that it was unclear. Adaptive Enterprise defines an entity where a company will be able to dynamically readjust to changes that affect its business

    Is outsourcing part of AE?
    Our strategy is to let you become a company that responds in real time to these changes; the secret is linking together the business processes to the resources.

    What's required?
    You have to have the inherent capability to respond quickly to any change that affects your business.

    1. Re:Does Nora Denzel even know what AE is? by pwtrash · · Score: 1
      Here's the saddest part:

      But aren't Sun and IBM doing that to make that happen? And IBM and Sun are investing a lot of money to make sure their software works with their respective utility computing programs. What are you doing besides saying we'll sit down with you and work on it? It's interesting. We've spent $2.5 billion in Adaptive Enterprise. That's a pretty healthy R&D investment, so I disagree that we're not investing in technology.

      What??? What exactly are you doing? heck, forget "exactly" - can you give us one glimpse into what, other than a standard consulting gig - is involved in AE? You've made a "tech investment" of 2.5 billion, but you can't even approach describing what that 2.5 billion worth of technology is? Does SCO own the intellectual property rights? Unbelievable. Fun & sad to read. Wrong person to sit for the wrong interview.

    2. Re:Does Nora Denzel even know what AE is? by SillySlashdotName · · Score: 1

      I agree, pwtrash - I always love it (really grit my teeth when I hear it) when the answer does not address the question.

      "But aren't Sun and IBM doing that to make that happen? And IBM and Sun are investing a lot of money to make sure their software works with their respective utility computing programs. What are you doing besides saying we'll sit down with you and work on it?It's interesting. We've spent $2.5 billion in Adaptive Enterprise. That's a pretty healthy R&D investment, so I disagree that we're not investing in technology. "

      Who said or asked about investing in technology? The question was "What are you doing besides saying we'll sit down with you and work on it" and "I disagree that we're not investing in technology" is not answering that question. In fact, your (Nora Denzels') answer totally evades the question. So you spent 2.5 billion in Adaptive Enterprise. How much was for consultants who cam up with the name 'Adaptive Enterprise', how much was payroll for the management who came up with the project, what specifically did you get for that 2.5 billion that makes your product better than another product? Yes, yes, that IS a pretty healty R&D investment, BUT was it all invested in R&D (was some of it G&A? How about Marketing?) and if so, WHAT DID YOU GET FOR THE MONEY that makes your product better than other products available from other venders?

      --
      Acts of massive stupidity are almost never covered by warranty. --me.
  20. Sounds good by Todd+Fisher · · Score: 1

    I define AE as a business strategy for customers who want to respond in real time to changes affecting their business.
    That's great but what if you opperate in fake time?

    --


    --I'm not talking about dance lessons. I'm talking about putting a brick through the other guy's windshield.-
  21. PLEASE DON'T RTFA by varjag · · Score: 1, Informative

    ... 'cause I did, and now suffer from severe buzzword poisoning.

    --
    Lisp is the Tengwar of programming languages.
    1. Re:PLEASE DON'T RTFA by varag · · Score: 1

      Surely, you mean a re-alignment of your jargon-based ontology?

  22. Vapourware by tobechar · · Score: 1

    After reading the linked article, it would appear that this "product" is nothing more than a quick way for HP to place all of its products throughout a company. The Adaptive Computing product itself is nothing but vapourware, a cloud of smoke.

    While HP does have some excellent products at their displosal, it just does not seem proper or accountable to create a "product" out of thin air.

    Adaptive Computing is obviously a new method of getting HP's foot in the door, which would then lead to every IT component being from HP's stock or products.

    Perhaps HP should use a more "Adaptive" name like HP Adaptive Business Solutions.

    --
    -
  23. I FIGURED IT OUT. by TomorrowPlusX · · Score: 0, Redundant

    I may lack whatever gene it is that helps to understand this double-think, or it's because I'm a programmer and it's my life to speak clearly and not use little game words like "the secret sauce we bring to the table" or other BS.

    Anyway, after reading it over and over, I figured it out -- it came to me in a flash:

    HP's business is *not* to help other companies dynamically hoo-ha to the ho-hum of a real-time somethingorother. Or whatever in god's name that robot was saying.

    Instead, HP's business is to bilk you out of your money while seducing you with double speak.

    Thank you.

    --

    lorem ipsum, dolor sit amet
    1. Re:I FIGURED IT OUT. by X · · Score: 1

      Actually, "secret sauce" was introduced by the interviewer, not the interviewee. Just one of many examples of how the interviewer did a bad job.

      --
      sigs are a waste of space
    2. Re:I FIGURED IT OUT. by exhilaration · · Score: 1

      Actually "special sauce" was introduced by the interviewer - the VP used Adaptive Enterprise technology to transforms it into "secret sauce".

    3. Re:I FIGURED IT OUT. by X · · Score: 1
      I suggest you reread the interview. Four quickies for you:
      1. The interviewer was Charles Cooper, not the VP
      2. Search the interview text for "sauce". Charles Cooper was the first one to mention it, and the VP only uses the term in response to the question.
      3. Nowhere did the VP make a statement that about Adaptive Enterprise technology transforming anything in to a secret sauce.
      4. The VP did make a statement that you don't need a lot of new technology in order to get your Enterprise into an adaptive state.
      --
      sigs are a waste of space
    4. Re:I FIGURED IT OUT. by exhilaration · · Score: 1
      Your statement: Actually, "secret sauce" was introduced by the interviewer, not the interviewee IS FALSE because the interviewer never used the term "secret sauce". Period.

      The question asked was, "What's the special sauce?"

      "secret sauce" != "special sauce"

  24. Not nearly as bad as it sounds by X · · Score: 4, Insightful

    The slashdot article makes it sound pretty bad, and admittedly c|net doesn't make it look great (honestly I thought this was a case of a bad interviewer, not a good one). However, this is not really that bad.

    AE is more just a term to associate with a different way of looking at the enterprise. While, it is not terribly different from what went on before, it is an evolutionary change. As the HP VP says, it's not a product or a technology, just a way of looking at using technology in an Enterprise.

    I can tell you in the Enterprise space 10 years ago, folks used to get excited about being able to add new products to their IT systems within 6 months (I kid you not). The notion of AE is that it should be measured in days. I'm sure some day it'll be down to hours or even minutes.

    Traditional Enterprise systems were increadibly static and rigid, and over time they are evolving to be much more dynamic and malleable. While this is nothing new to tech folks like us, it's a bit of a wake up call to the business folks who are just getting used to implications of how to mix business and IT based on how things were 5 years ago.

    Again as the VP says, it's not that you can't work towards AE without HP. You can go to anybody for it. His claims about HP's uniqueness are another story (let's face it, all that can be unique when you're talking about providing expertise to execute on an abstract busines strategy is the brand name, and the trust/confidence associated with it).

    So yeah, on one hand it is marketing BS, but on the other hand you need a marketing message in order to communicate to business folks how IT capabilities have evolved and how they can go beyond the existing set of limitations they have come to expect of IT.

    --
    sigs are a waste of space
    1. Re:Not nearly as bad as it sounds by Fnkmaster · · Score: 1
      Oh, so now you're supposed to be able to develop new applications in minutes, for deployment in two days, just because the CEO says so? That must be an adaptive enterprise. Well damn, why didn't she just say so.


      No man, that's a stupid enterprise. If Adaptive Enterprise was described as a strategy and technique for building better communication channels between business and IT within an organization to facilitate rapid rollout of reliable, rock-solid new applications at minimal cost and effort, then why didn't this moron just say so? Jesus, apparently HP needs me as a Senior VP. Too bad they could never afford what I'd want to work in such a mindnumbing environment - though I'd consider the CEO position when it opens up.

    2. Re:Not nearly as bad as it sounds by X · · Score: 1

      No, the idea is that you don't have to build a whole new application. The idea is that your existing IT infrastructure adapts to the new product without needing a new application. Now, this is an idealized goal, and there are many cases where you can't do this, but it is something that can be done (indeed has been done) for many situations.

      If Adaptive Enterprise was described as a strategy and technique for building better communication channels between business and IT within an organization to facilitate rapid rollout of reliable, rock-solid new applications at minimal cost and effort, then why didn't this moron just say so?

      From the interview:

      "The secret sauce that HP brings is the ability to link business processes--which obviously are a manifestation of a company's strategy--to IT gear. The big breakthrough is when those two things are synchronized, so changes in the business environment can dynamically trigger the IT changes necessary to support that business change."

      Admittedly she didn't get in as many buzzwords as you did, but I think she actually did state that very clearly.

      --
      sigs are a waste of space
    3. Re:Not nearly as bad as it sounds by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      And it took them just 2.5 billion dollars to figure out?

      It is amazing !

      For that much of money I would have expected some AI system that does all the work and actually runs the company(replacing all C level positions).

    4. Re:Not nearly as bad as it sounds by Clover_Kicker · · Score: 1

      >The notion of AE is that it should be measured in days. I'm sure some
      >day it'll be down to hours or even minutes.

      Um, not to be a jerk, but HOW?

    5. Re:Not nearly as bad as it sounds by Frac · · Score: 1

      Nope.. that was a good interviewer, since the questions weren't staged so the VP can answer more fluff. The questions tried to probe the REAL reason AE is different, and you can see the VP skirm from dodging the questions, while regurgitating what she said over and over again.

      What would be a good response for the VP? Exactly what you just said :) A good example of how it was then, and what it should be now. The VP couldn't even get to the Target case study for five questions!

      Finally, it's sad that a VP can't even explain the core competencies between their own and their competitors, at least on a very high level.

    6. Re:Not nearly as bad as it sounds by MoneyT · · Score: 1

      So it's all about changing business environments to respond to needs faster and more efficiently, or essentialy, one of the goals of every business out there. So what exactly do we need to hire HP for to tell us this?

      --
      T Money
      World Domination with a plastic spoon since 1984
    7. Re:Not nearly as bad as it sounds by X · · Score: 1

      Ugh. I think this gets to the central point that people aren't getting here. AE isn't some proprietary technology that HP has. It's a vision of where your business could be, and HP thinks it has the best products and services to help you get there.

      Given that this is at a high level, there aren't specific products and services out there that make one company better than the other in anything other than trivial ways (you'd laugh pretty hard if I said "Java" or "Itanium" or "HP-UX" wouldn't you?).

      All that any company can bring to the table is a brand that you can trust, and HP probably feels pretty good about competing in that space.

      --
      sigs are a waste of space
    8. Re:Not nearly as bad as it sounds by X · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Um, not to be a jerk, but HOW?

      Well, if I knew the answer to that I'd be out looking for venture capital. However, there are some obvious pieces of the puzzle needed in order to make that happen. Probably the biggest one is on the IT interface side of things. You'd need a way for the IT system to have business changes communicated to it very quickly and efficiently. This could be through an active interface, something that provides a really clear model of the business such that someone can just manipulate the model to describe the changes (before you think this is impossible, keep in mind that B-school folks do this already). Alternatively, it could be a passive interface that observes changes in the business and adapts to them. Maybe we'll just all have cybernetic implants. ;-)

      Jini and similar technologies show how you can do this in terms of the implementation side. You have a bunch of federated services that find each other in response to certain needs. They're completely distributed, so changes are immediately reflected across the whole network. So, this part of the equation could easily get to the point where changes effectively take place in milliseconds.

      Then you have what is probably the slowest part of the equation: marketing and sales. It's just hard to come up with a new marketing pitch in an hour, so probably what you'll see more likely are things like learning machines hooked up to electronic advertising systems. So, when new products roll out, the learning machine would start making adjustments to what banner ads and search ads you place, and maybe when and where your TV commericals and product placements are made (yup, someday we'll have movies where the soda the star is drinking can dynamically change brands). You already see services out there which will constantly change your banner ads and search ads in order to optimize advertising impact.

      Lots of problems with all this, I'm sure, but it's actually not too hard to see that these kinds of things will eventually happen. When it gets there, it'll already be second nature to us tech folks, but the business folks will still be getting used to the notion that they can place a search ad today and have sales within minutes. ;-)

      --
      sigs are a waste of space
    9. Re:Not nearly as bad as it sounds by X · · Score: 2, Interesting

      Nope... that was a good interviewer, since the questions weren't staged so the VP can answer more fluff.

      Yeah, you know you are seeing an interviewer who's cutting through the fluff when the interviewer (as opposed to the interviewee) introduces terms like "special sauce" and "paradigm shift". ;-)

      I drew my comments entirely from the content in that interview. What's different was that I had a clue about the subject matter, unlike the interviewer. The interviewer's agenda appears mostly to be just to make the interviewee look bad, rather than to ask probing questions.

      Questions like "Is outsourcing part of AE?" are a waste of time. The question that can't be answered with more fluff would be more along the lines of: "Can you give me an example of a customer you're working with on AE, and what the impact of AE has been on their business." If they question with something like, "well, we're just starting this", than you rephrase to "what the expected impact of AE will be on their business". If they answer the question with just a cost savings number, you follow up with, "yeah, but specifically how and what did (or will) it change in terms of the company's capabilities?"

      Instead this "probing" interviewer essentially walked into a quagmire of industry jargon and semantics. The interviewer didn't seem to be listening to the answers to the questions. Heck, half a dozen questions after the exec pointed out that the difference was AE and HP was not linked to a particular technology, the interviewer is still thinking in terms of differentiation based on technology.

      If you look at the questions, they are mostly the kind of open ended, broadly phrased questions that cannot be answered concretely. I think my favorite was "Do you feel the message is unclear and needs rethinking?" ;-)

      --
      sigs are a waste of space
    10. Re:Not nearly as bad as it sounds by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0
      I can tell you in the Enterprise space 10 years ago, folks used to get excited about being able to add new products to their IT systems within 6 months (I kid you not). The notion of AE is that it should be measured in days. I'm sure some day it'll be down to hours or even minutes.

      Bah. It is just not possible to make that claim for such a vague class as "new products". Reading your other comments make me think you are shilling for HP.

    11. Re:Not nearly as bad as it sounds by X · · Score: 1

      Okay, I'll be more specific: when I did consulting for various retail banking customers 10 years ago, I was involved in a 10 man years in a project that the bank hoped would allow their IT systems to add new mortgage and loan products within 6 months of product conception (without it being in the system, there was no way to actually provide the product). It actually didn't quite succeed in getting it down to 6 months, but it was close.

      It is a bit much to judge me as shill given that you clearly have no background on the subject matter. It makes as much sense as me judging you as a troll based on two sentences. ;-)

      --
      sigs are a waste of space
    12. Re:Not nearly as bad as it sounds by X · · Score: 1

      Sigh. No, they invested 2.5 billion dollars in research and development of products to help make it happen.

      While you may think that 2.5 billion is all you need to achieve a working AI, the history of the field suggests otherwise.

      --
      sigs are a waste of space
    13. Re:Not nearly as bad as it sounds by MoneyT · · Score: 1

      Ok, so they beleive they have the best products and services so what are those? That's the question that was being asked. What makes HP different? What makes HP the people we want to invest money into? It's a simple question, but apparently there is no answer.

      --
      T Money
      World Domination with a plastic spoon since 1984
    14. Re:Not nearly as bad as it sounds by Clover_Kicker · · Score: 1

      That all sounds cool :) But in 2003, I don't think any vendor's snake oil will get me any closer to what you describe.

      I'm just not sure why you're defending the HP sales pitch.

    15. Re:Not nearly as bad as it sounds by Frac · · Score: 1

      I have to disagree :) The interviewer, regardless whether he really knows AE or not, was not supposed to know what AE is. That's the whole point really - because a target customer of HP would not know what AE is either.

      It's really the VP's role to explain what AE is, and why they're different from IBM and Sun. The fact that VP can't get the message across under pressure doesn't look good for HP.

      I agree that some of the questions are loaded, and fairly hostile. But when you're on the sell side (HP), you're supposed to handle those questions gracefully, and not answer the fluff with more fluff :)

    16. Re:Not nearly as bad as it sounds by X · · Score: 1

      The problem wasn't that the interviewer didn't know what AE was. The interviewer didn't understand the problem domain.

      We're all techies, so were looking at this thing like it's some kind of technology, just like inteviewer did. We do this despite the fact that the VP specifically said it wasn't a technology. The VP actually very clearly defined what is meant by AE. It just turns out it isn't some kind of product you buy. They have a ton of products that can help with that, but there isn't a sound bite that can give an answer like that in the context of a 5 minute interview.

      I'd suggest that it's terribly difficult and generally not wise, particularly in a hostile environment, to answer a fluff question with a non-fluff answer.

      --
      sigs are a waste of space
    17. Re:Not nearly as bad as it sounds by X · · Score: 1

      Well, snake oil only makes you think you are getting closer. ;-)

      Actually, even in what I described I made reference to what you call "snake oil" from various vendors. Nobody has a complete solution that would get you down to rolling out new widgets in hours, but you really can get stuff today that will get things down to 30 days. You can also get systems that will respond in seconds to specific
      changes (as opposed to the wide ranging changes envisioned in the AE ideal) in the business climate.

      I'm not defending the HP sales pitch. I haven't said anything in support of their products (heck, the only product I mentioned was a Sun product). Arguably I'm defending the VP, and the reason I'm doing that is I hate seeing poor journalism mistaken for "hard hitting" journalism. The failure of the audience to distinguish between the two is killing the quality of news media in general.

      --
      sigs are a waste of space
    18. Re:Not nearly as bad as it sounds by Clover_Kicker · · Score: 1

      >Arguably I'm defending the VP, and the reason I'm doing that is I hate
      >seeing poor journalism mistaken for "hard hitting" journalism. The
      >failure of the audience to distinguish between the two is killing the
      >quality of news media in general.

      Ah, now I see where you're coming from.

      Allow me to wander off-topic :) When I read your vision of superfast application changes and development, one thought strikes me - I've never worked for an organization that could make intelligent snap decisions. I get the screaming heebie-jeebies thinking about a technology that allows "the business" to implement the first thing that comes into their head.

  25. I'm sold... by swagr · · Score: 1

    but does it run on Windows?

    --

    -... --- .-. . -.. ..--..
  26. The problem is... by Trolling+4+dollas · · Score: 1

    This stuff works. I see it everyday! I'm a consultant for a medium sized firm and the client just simply amazes me. We in the trenches do an exceptional job despite having idiot boss and various other counter productive policies. My boss is a freaking walking talking cliche. He's always saying the stupest stuff you've ever heard but the client loves it and usually just says "Can you get that in before the end of fiscal?" of course he always says we can but we rarely do. They never learn we could tell them cosmic rays are interfering with our server's brains so we'll need new ones and they'd pay up. This is widespread and this is how IBM, HP, MS, and SCO make their money.

  27. AE = Let HP help you cut your staff by agent_stretch · · Score: 5, Informative

    Disclaimer: I was recently laid off as my position was outsourced to HP.

    First, I don't think that the VP ever really answered the questions that were asked. I think the whole point behind trying to sell the Adaptive Enterprise is that it is not something you can clearly define. I'd hate to actually do contract negotiations with them as I'm sure both parties will have different thoughts on what is covered under HP services.

    The whole line about being able to dynamically restructure your IT resources to me means HP can help you figure out how to axe 1/3rd of your workforce and still "adapt" to your business needs. As the interviewer pointed out, aligning IT with your business it nothing new. Hiring outside consultants to help do it is nothing new.

    It begs the question, what is new about adaptive enterprise? Answer: Nothing. I don't see any proof that it is anything more than another marketing strategy designed to sell billable hours and support/consulting contracts.

    1. Re:AE = Let HP help you cut your staff by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Interesting

      The parent poster is correct. I work for a company marginally associated with this effort, and will remain anonymous, but basically HP is following IBMs lead in the autonomic computing space.

      What is autonomic computing? Simply put, the desire to apply business rules to IT infrastructure. Automatically. In order to cut costs, and lay people off.

      So, ultimately, the goal is to have your IT infrastructure manage itself. In the short term, that may involve integrating alerts and thier solutions across a variety of devices, so that if you get a particular error on a cisco router, the router is reconfigured automatically. Later, they would like to bring new devices onto the network, install enterprise apps on them, and let them loose - without any manual intervention.

      Now, there are some serious technical and social hurdles to overcome. First, the heterogenous nature of every network makes applying the same bandaid solution to the same problem impossible across devices. Cisco gear, for example, has been made by a variety of manufacturers that Cisco has aquired throughout the years. Different MIBS, different OSes, different versions of all of the above. Its a nightmare. Thats just Cisco.

      More serious is the objections of the IT staff. For good reason, NOC guys shudder at the thought of changing thier network configuration automatically, with no engineer in the loop. One configuration change can break a shitload of other functionality you depend on. How is this software supposed to account for that?

      Ultimately, (yet this is what is being marketed today) strong AI will be needed to solve many these problems. Nevertheless, IBM and HP are committing billions to these efforts. Good luck, guys, you'll need it.

      I will say though, if autonomic computing can at least get NOC people on the same page as the groups they serve, that would be a major breakthrough. I've been in many Fortune 500 NOCs where the NOC personal have never even met the DBAs whose boxen they look after, for example, and getting things fixed is often a case in finger pointing over email, all the while money goes down the tubes. This is not the NOC guys or the DBAs fault; its a process issue, but autonomic computing can at least force these guys to talk to each other.

  28. Just a touch of a rant here.... by PugMajere · · Score: 3, Insightful
    From the article:
    I disagree that it was unclear.

    If I say something is unclear, generally, I mean "It is unclear to me." I believe that's true of, oh, everyone, when they say that something is unclear.

    So, I feel obliged to ponder: How do YOU disagree with my opinion that something is unclear?

    Especially when I'm interviewing you saying, in essence, "What the heck is this about?"

    I guess I just hate marketing people.

    1. Re:Just a touch of a rant here.... by happyfrogcow · · Score: 1

      I guess I just hate marketing people

      Or as I like to call them, Liars.

  29. cool article by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0
    wow, a good interview on CNet for once that is hard-hitting. Most of the interviews are so fluffy, but this one really goes for it. Like some other posts, I have to use .NET at work. Is it useful? Sure, but it's no magic bullet. All the same problems with DLL are still there. All the same scalability problems for really large enterprise deployments are still there. It has improved in measurable ways. For example, the concept of async calls is prevasive throughout the whole MS stack now. This was done to improve reliability and solve the problem of servers crashing like crazy under moderate load.

    I don't consider myself a .NET guru, but the team I'm working with have tried to consider all options and constantly question our approach to make sure we're not mis-using the technology. For the most part, it is Microsoft's replacement for Java, with very little real benefit aside from syntactic sugar and programming shortcuts.

  30. Only the Polygoniest technologies by SolemnDragon · · Score: 4, Funny
    I cannot read marketing print anymore without imagining it being read aloud by StrongBad. But for further amusement, imagine it being read by:

    A pirate ("Arr, we'll return on yer investment, matey, just hand over the doubloons...")

    A Parrot ("Squawk! Polly wants leverage, polly wants synergies leveraged, squawk!"

    A dog trainer ("Sit, marketing rep! Now, demonstrate CRM, demonstrate CR- SIT! bad rep! Shame on you!")

    Mr. Hainey from Green Acres ( "I bet you'll be wantin' one o' these here market share segments, to go with that product, won'cha?")

    Krusty the Clown ("Hey hey!! Now 'does not cause instant bankruptcy' in every box!")

    Dr. Evil ("I'll give you ten minutes to amuse me. Begin your presentation....NOW.")

    Personally, i think HP is counting on non-technical word of mouth and goodwill, which is why all these ads focus on things like preserving artwork and capturing criminals- if your other managers like the HP ads, they're more likely to approve HP-related spending... and think that it's worth it, even if they don't understand the product or the language describing it.

    1. Re:Only the Polygoniest technologies by vsprintf · · Score: 1

      Personally, i think HP is counting on non-technical word of mouth and goodwill, which is why all these ads focus on things like preserving artwork and capturing criminals- if your other managers like the HP ads, they're more likely to approve HP-related spending... and think that it's worth it, even if they don't understand the product or the language describing it.

      Personally, I think Carly has dismantled just about everything that made HP a good, solid company, and now she needs a new buzzword to get the stock price up and make her stock options profitable.

  31. In which case... by ColourlessGreenIdeas · · Score: 0

    PHBs might want to consider the fact that many of HP's people have been laid off and outsourced to India. The new people in India might be very clever, but they started last month and don't know what's going on yet.

    --
    In soviet russia stale jokes recycle you!
  32. i totally agree by theMerovingian · · Score: 1

    My favorite cliche is 'action item'. Lets have a meeting, set a time table, and come up with a list of 'action items'.

    Some people would rather talk than work - that's the only explanation.

    --
    "If you think you have things under control, you're not going fast enough." --Mario Andretti
  33. HP Source by Dogtanian · · Score: 0

    They're trying to sell you yummy steak sauce, duh!

    (How the heck was this modded as flamebait?)

    The ingredients are listed on the side of the bottle, but the recipe isn't- does this mean it qualifies as open sauce? Would Richard Stallman approve, or should we design our own sauce and post the recipe all over Usenet?

    Then again, he mentions something about secret sauce halfway down, but tells us what it is. But not what's in it. Hmmmmmmmm....

    BTW, for anyone in the United Kingdom, clicking on that link and seeing that mockney p***k Jamie Oliver halfway down is roughly on a par with clicking on a Goatse link.

    --
    "Slashdot - News and Chat Sites Deviant". (Click "homepage" link above for details).
  34. Accurate snapshot by 32bitwonder · · Score: 1

    I for one am glad someone brought this issue forward as I believe it accurately represents the current state of the "enterprise" computing industry. I've witnessed first hand (though not necessarily from HP) endless presentations of vague marketing speak - selling ideas rather than actual product. Further digging only reveals more double speak, even from those supposedly providing technical support. In the end, no one knows what it is they're evaluating and what's worse it comes at us from all fronts, not just from one company. It's an excruciating process which no one understands, and it tells me just how far the industry has fallen in the past few years. The investment in product just doesn't appear to be there anymore and the sales teams are left with regurgitating meaningless marketing speak wrapped around some re-branded product "acquired" sometime last year.

  35. surely the special sauce... by jamesangel · · Score: 0

    ...is HP sauce. Today bacon, tomorrow ebusiness.

  36. HP Eliza == Adaptive Computing? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Reads like the old Eliza program, except the latter was more adaptive and dynamic.

    If HP's best effort, they are doomed.

  37. new interview request by altstadt · · Score: 2, Interesting

    I'd like to see Charles Cooper interview whoever came up with .Net, too.

    Forget about .net. Get this guy to interview Darl.

    1. Re:new interview request by brotherscrim · · Score: 1

      that wouldn't be as much fun as you think: Darl is a blunt liar. What made the HP interview amusing was it was an interview with a vague, market-speak obsessed liar.

  38. Arghh Management by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 4, Informative
    Ok, I agree that HP's marketing picture is somewhat muddled, but there is real technology behind what they are talking about. If you want more detail and some whitepapers, you can look here.

    The utility computing aspects of the 'adaptive enterprise' are quite real and you can buy it today in the form of the HP Utility Data Center. In a word, UDC is about infrastructure automation - a data center in which you can rapidly deploy (and redeploy) servers and services with no hands-on work, and not requiring you to have a huge, specialized support staff.

    To really have an adaptive enterprise, you need more things layered on top of infrastructure automation, but it is a key building block. Other vendors like Sun and IBM are selling this type of concept, but I think you'll find that HP has more actual products than the competition. HP's marketing does stink though.

    1. Re:Arghh Management by Kpau · · Score: 1

      Why does the phrase "mainframe era" keep drifting through my head when I see talk of outsourced data centers and centralized computing? Hmmmm???? Re the interview... this was a *great* interview and I wish this guy had carte blanche to interview every CXX of every company... particularly Ballmer and Bill, but only if they were lashed down so they couldn't end the interview.

  39. Marketing droids.... by jkabbe · · Score: 1

    Adaptive Enterprise.....as explained by the .NET marketing team!

  40. Grid Computing by nathan+s · · Score: 1

    Basically what HP is trying to sell is grid computing, as best as I can interpret this. Nothing new, just another heavyweight moving in to this 'technology of the future' area.:-P

    She says "Whether it's called utility or grid or any of the words that are used, I think the next 10 years will be typified by the linkage of business processes to your IT resources and dynamically reallocating--I like to say it's the automatic supply and demand matching of your computing resources. So they become much more resilient and adaptable." Also, "We're entering a new decade of computing--whatever it is called. All it means is that you will use IT resources in the same way that you use a utility like a light. You take what you use. You don't have a generator at your house; there's a power grid somewhere else and you tap into it."

    Essentially that's what she's trying to say, if you cut out all of the jargon.

  41. Thanks Coop by salesgeek · · Score: 1

    It's about time the computer media started holding people's feet to the fire for puking up sylable soup instead of answers. Since I got my first copy of Byte and PC World back in the 80s I've been amazed by how easy the media go on companies:

    * They actually buy into stupid products like MS Bob, Lotus Jazz and the internet appliance doomed to failure of the week. Then they lament the product's demise as being ahead of it's time or too powerfull.

    * They let executives off the hook way too easy:

    Reporter: what does your e-storagewizard.com professional do?

    Exec:It enables your information technology team to exploits synergies in your networked digital storage infrastructure leveraging economies of scale to deliver a competitive advantage and superior return on investment.

    Reporter: What's your sales outlook for next year?

    Product shootouts tested by _______mag labs are always a crock.

    Finally, they don't report on things that really would help IT pros. I would love to see an article that actually warned that buying a crappy enterprise software app was bad for your career:

    DO NOT BUY ____________

    After _________mag labs testing, we have determined that _________, ________'s flagship enterprise package is rife with bugs, security liabilites and flat-out does not work as billed. In fact last year 10 out of 15 CxOs who bought _______ were canned.

    One can hope.

    --
    -- $G
  42. Uhhh... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    This is the stuff..

    where books are written but never read...

    where speeches are given but never heard...

    business speech... ...like hugh load of cum onto your fucked brain...

  43. 2.5 billion by varjag · · Score: 1

    That's right. HP has invested 2.5 billion in R&D of that "Adaptive Enterprise", and all they came up with is a buzzword-spewing VP.

    --
    Lisp is the Tengwar of programming languages.
  44. HP hires Scott Adams by HomerJayS · · Score: 3, Funny
    "I define AE as a business strategy for customers who want to respond in real time to changes affecting their business."

    This looks like it came directly from the Dilbert mission statement generator.

    1. Re:HP hires Scott Adams by critter_hunter · · Score: 1

      The whole article actually reminded me of Chris Wright's.NIT story arc

      --
      Karma: Could be worse (could be raining)
  45. No, no conflict of interest here by SuperBanana · · Score: 1

    HP: "Blah blah blah"

    Cnet:"Look you weenie, we all know you people talk in marketspeak. What are you REALLY saying you pathetic looooooser?"

    SWISH! ZOOM! KAPOW! BUY IBM DB2 PRODUCTS!

    HP:"Uh, what was that?"

    Cnet:"Nothing, you shmuck."

    Pay no attention to the IBM flash ads(or, for that matter, that IBM advertises with Slashdot etc.) Wouldn't it be nice if technical journals held to the same standards as newspapers with regards to journalistic integrity? Then again, i suppose it would be nice if people who wrote technical articles were actually journalists, instead of mystery consultants who have no qualifications except that they claim to know something about technology and list "technical writer" on their resume...

    1. Re:No, no conflict of interest here by Fulcrum+of+Evil · · Score: 1

      Wouldn't it be nice if technical journals held to the same standards as newspapers with regards to journalistic integrity?

      Um, this is a newspaper, not a tech journal.

      --
      "We returned the General to El Salvador, or maybe Guatemala, it's difficult to tell from 10,000 feet"
    2. Re:No, no conflict of interest here by swordgeek · · Score: 1

      Hmm. What would you rather have; a system that avoids displaying any ads for the competition on an article about a given company? I don't know what ads came up when I actually read the article, but the ones I saw when I went back and refreshed it were for Intel, Sybase, MS, Dell, and yes, IBM.

      I didn't see anything wrong with the interview. The interviewer asked questions, and demanded straightforward answers. They also had the background to see that this isn't anything different than what Sun, IBM, MS (.NET), and for that matter SAP and TIBCO and the rest have been promising us for decades.

      I'm not a huge fan of most technical columnists, but I didn't have any problems with this.

      --

      "People who do stupid things with hazardous materials often die." -- Jim Davidson on alt.folklore.urban
  46. You do realize... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    ...the guy was trolling...right? Right?

    1. Re:You do realize... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Do you want to spend all weekend re-parameterizing the frambus? I didn't think so!

      HP+. Its made our business their business+.


      And I wasn't?!!?

      ha!

      -Mekka B

  47. It's OK, I speak buzzword. Here's a translation by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Q: Stripped of all the jargon and market-speak, can you succinctly define what Adaptive Enterprise is supposed to be about?
    A: Something HP sells that costs lots of money.

    That could be boilerplate applying to any company. What's the special sauce?
    HP sells it, and not some other company.

    Can't you get that by going to any reputable company out there? Sun, IBM--that's what they're about. Am I missing something here?
    Hellooooo....HP sells it - you can't get it from anyone else.

    So what is it?
    Something HP sells that costs lots of money.

    So how is that any different from what system integrators are doing? When an EDS goes into a company, they presumably are meeting the business needs of the client.
    Hellllooooo....As I mentioned before, HP sells it, not EDS.

    Well, not necessarily. An EDS is as much a system integrator as an outsourcer. The system integration part is what I think I'm hearing from you. That HP will make things work together--the business processes, the technology.
    Yes, that's correct, HP sells it, not EDS. EDS also kicks puppies.

    There still seems to be confusion surrounding the topic. At the Gartner conference last month, some IT attendees said they still say they didn't understand what Carly Fiorina wanted to convey with HP's Adaptive Enterprise. Do you feel the message is unclear or needs rethinking?
    I disagree that it was unclear. To reiterate, HP sells it and it's expensive. It does everything you need.

    But aren't Sun and IBM doing that to make that happen? And IBM and Sun are investing a lot of money to make sure their software works with their respective utility computing programs. What are you doing besides saying we'll sit down with you and work on it?
    IBM and Sun also kick puppies.

    Is outsourcing part of AE?
    It can be, if you want it to be, and you pay us alot of money. Otherwise, no.

    In the broadest definition it just sounds as if this is another form of services business where you want to make money. You're not selling new hardware or software--it's services.
    Whatever.....

    But that's still not most people's experience with computing.
    That's correct. Lots of people have not been giving us money. We want to fix that.

    What's required?
    Giving us money.

    But again, how does that differ from what's been around?
    The money is going to us, and not someone else.

    So what's the so-called paradigm shift?
    See previous response.

    But hasn't that always been the goal?
    For other companies, not us.

    But pardon me, that's been talked about for more than a decade and a half--literally. The other thing is that you talk about overprovisioning--but with the cost of hardware coming down, is that still so much of a big deal? That is, you buy a $10,000 server whereas 10 years ago that would have cost $250,000 apiece?
    It's new in the case where people were spending on equipment, and now we needed to find another way to make money.

    Is there culpability on the vendors' part because most of the big IT providers were like the proverbial fox guarding the hen house? They had product arms and services arms, and they were the ones pushing the big multimillion-dollar deals.
    Ohhhh noooooo, it's clearly the CIO who should be fired. Not the consultants. Especially if they are from HP.

    In talking with companies that offer these big-sounding initiatives, it sounds as if there's an assumption that IT is in danger of being overwhelmed and that they don't know how to build flexibility into their systems.
    Absolutely, it's time to panic.

    So what does that suggest for the role of CIO in deciding upon IT projects?
    They should buy something HP sells that costs lots of money.

  48. Let's face it... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    HP is slowly turning into a marketing company. I just got one of their holiday brochures and, boy, is it pretty.

    Aside: Any guesses as to why the press gives them so many free rides? I'd sound off, but it's a very sensitive topic. :)

  49. JetDirect by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    The new HP is a joke.
    I miss old JetDirect. It would find the printers on your network you can mange them w/o them being tied to central server, etc... It was great technology.

    Now you have to install web server on your local machine or server. Its a joke. Web enabled printing is fine. But, so things just worked before. Keep it simple stupid.

  50. Hewlett and Packard are rolling in their graves by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    thanks to Carly. Her new corporate jets and her new no-product all-buzzword style of management. She is only interested in increasing her own compensation, not what is best for the company and their workers.

    1. Re:Hewlett and Packard are rolling in their graves by chrish · · Score: 1

      Isn't that how they teach you to manage at MBA school? Rape the corporation, get the golden handshake, move on to the next victim...

      --
      - chrish
  51. Re:fuck linux by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Mr Gates? We cannot see past the choices we don't understand. Ergo, can you see past the choice of going to a linux friendly site to spew your hatred for linux?

  52. Re:You really don't know anything, do you, Michael by Pov · · Score: 1

    I'd mod you up if I was a moderator today. Thanks for this post. .NET is the biggest improvement in coding technology since we went OO IMHO. Admittedly, MS has done a poor job of explaining it to the masses, but ANY programmer should realize within a few minutes of using it that it does everything Java was supposed to do, but failed at and a lot more. It is the tits right now. And the 2.0 spec is even better.

    --
    --- Don't be a player hater: I meta-mod ALL negative mods as Unfair.
  53. What exactly does this prove by jayhawk88 · · Score: 1

    That vice presidents in charge of whatever can't speak intelligently unless they're barfing up quotes from their own full-page ads in InformationWeek? Who the hell didn't already know that?

  54. Thanks CNET, really by utahjazz · · Score: 1

    I listened to the Carly Fiorina webcast on Adaptive Enterprise. Her response to every question about it was like "In the future, everyting will be dynamic and virtual".

    Seriously, what the fuck does that mean?

    1. Re:Thanks CNET, really by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      It means in the future, nothing will be static or real.

  55. HP Adaptation by emil · · Score: 2, Informative

    Instead of all of this unintelligble claptrap, HP needs to devote a decent amount of concentration to their Enterprise systems division, and make some hard choices.

    HP is no longer saying "bet the company" on Itanium, but currently HP-UX and VMS are totally wagered on Intel's unproven architecture.

    The Alpha base has been easy pickings for Solaris and Linux, and the rest of the HP Enterprise customer base is watching as HP "burns the boats" and our systems investments vaporize.

    I realize that HP believes it has sound reasons for sending PA-RISC and Alpha to sleep with the fishes, but there is currently no backup for these OS environments if Itanium fails (which looks likely).

    You can't bring back the dead, but HP needs to immediately and publicly port HP-UX and VMS to the AMD Opteron, and let the customers determine which architecture will survive.

    HP has been willing to engage AMD in the PC market for mostly no good purpose (the margins on these products are razor thin). If HP has braved Intel's wrath for this useless gesture, then HP should take a risk that really counts and let the market decide the fate of Itanium vs. Opteron.

    HP, the choice is yours, adapt or die.

    1. Re:HP Adaptation by AJWM · · Score: 1

      I know the history, but it still seems strange to this old-timer (who was involved in the decision to buy one of the first 11/780s for a college lab) to see VMS referred to in the context of HP operating systems.

      --
      -- Alastair
    2. Re:HP Adaptation by landaker · · Score: 1

      HP, the choice is yours, adapt or die.

      Maybe they should consult with themselves to see how they can better leverage Adaptive Enterprise technology to integrate their business practices and IT services. That should help them adapt in "real-time," after all.

    3. Re:HP Adaptation by dasmegabyte · · Score: 1

      Yeah, I think it's funny that their examples list a choice between two virtual software machines -- Java's VM and Microsoft's .NET -- while offering no choices at all in hardware. It's like they're saying, "Yes, your business should be agile and adaptive, but ours shouldn't."

      Ideally, the choice of virtual machine really should be inconsequential to anything other than the OS. Both Java and .NET frameworks can run excellent, scalable applications, everything from GUI applications to server application and web services. It's almost a non issue, mostly a "who do you trust" issue, with some Cost of UNIX/Linus vs Cost of Windows and scalability limitations hyperbole thrown in for color. Neither is going to disappear any time soon. However, the hardware could be a big decision. If your hardware becomes unsupportable because your platform's end of lined, you're out a crapload of money.

      Where's the ability to adapt your business in realtime when your hardware/software vendor has put all his eggs in one basket so as not to piss off Intel, a waning market leader with a solution many experts regard as too little too late?

      --
      Hey freaks: now you're ju
  56. I've found HP's special sauce by anat0010 · · Score: 2, Funny
    HP's special sauce ?.

    I'm not sure if it "links business processes together", but it does get quite sticky if you dont clear it up prompty when it spills.

  57. Problem of perception on the VPspeak by siskbc · · Score: 4, Insightful
    All credit to this interviewer, who refused to swallow the crap this VP kept spewing

    The VP's real problem is her attitude to information that suggests potential customers don't understand what the hell their AE angle is supposed to be about. When prompted that no customers understood Carly's presentation, she said she thought the customers were wrong and that she thought it was very clear.

    While kissing the boss's ass is usually a good thing, it doesn't matter how clear you think something is - if the customers don't understand it, it's NOT CLEAR. And that's the bottom line.

    The interviewer was a good litmus for that too. He is (presumably) somewhat well versed in IT, had the benefit of asking follow-up questions, and still couldn't figure out what the hell HP is doing. Not good for HP.

    Really, the HP crowd give the impression that they've talked this up so much between each other that it must be gold. Sounds like some serious groupthink. They think they've got this great operation defined by killer buzzwords, we think they're an IBM knockoff with a bad PR campaign.

    If you ask me, it sounds like .Net all over again. What the hell was .Net? I still don't know. They need to learn from IBM - clearly explained yet funny commercials. IBM's commercials tell me their software puts customer data together. HP's tell me that vigilante plus-signs put bad guys in jail. How? I dunno.

    And that's a problem for HP.

    --

    -Looking for a job as a materials chemist or multivariat

    1. Re:Problem of perception on the VPspeak by dasmegabyte · · Score: 1

      .NET is a marketting term for a safer, easier to use Windows API. It is a set of technologies including a virtual machine and a series of wrappers around DLLs outside of the VM.

      Essentially, it's the first step towards a Windows that has no native code other than the virtual machine itself. In this way, it's sort of like making a JavaOS, only without a lot of the harder to implement baggage of trying to implement a VM on top of an OS on top of a real machine.

      In the end, it's also a step towards safer, more secure computing...with the dream being that no software can thwart the VM command interpretter and thus gain complete access to the machine.

      Of course, right now it's a marketting mess that looks a lot like Java without the hardware and OS flexibility. Once you've written code in it, you start to see the benefits VERY quickly. They're just not the readily impressive sort of benefits that sell hardware to non programmers. So marketting gussied it up a bit, threw together some neat case studies and some concepts like "every program works in a web broswer," and managed to get people to buy into what's a great system, just for completely different reasons than it's being sold for.

      --
      Hey freaks: now you're ju
    2. Re:Problem of perception on the VPspeak by danila · · Score: 1

      We know that now. It took more than a year for this to become clear. When .Net was announced, noone had no idea whatsoever, check some old articles. And BTW, notice how .Net was used for branding all that time. It seems to me that many of the .Net products had nothing whatsoever in common with your present understanding of .Net

      May be we can expect HP to make some meaningful product and start selling it under AE brand in a few years?

      --
      Future Wiki -- If you don't think about the future, you cannot have one.
  58. Wow by msuzio · · Score: 2, Interesting

    I think I am now dumber having read that interview. Nowhere in that whole page did she say anything resembling a real thought. If I read something about "linking your business practices to your IT" again, I think I would have gone totally zombie.

    Maybe that's the plan. Subliminal hypnosis. Only explanation for a CTO giving any money to HP for this pile of BS.

    Oh, well, back to my own synergistic business initiatives linking IT to the customer base in a proactive fashion.

  59. Sales Focus by turgid · · Score: 1

    That lack of focus explains a lot. No wonder they are having difficulty selling these

  60. HP itself doesn't know what they are selling by j0217995 · · Score: 2, Funny

    Recently at my company we tried to contact HP for more KVM cables for our KVM switch. This is an "older" HP product. Talk about a joke trying to get the product.

    Upon contact support, the only number findable on the website I was transfered to parts and spoke with someone thier. After giving the part number to the lady, she said "I don't know if we still make that product." How can the company not know if they make something anything more. It took her almost a half-hour to try and find the product or the replacement product. I finally asked her if this was because of the merger between HP and Compaq. She said yes, that it is a nightmare in the parts department because no one knows when or if they cancel a product.

    I don't understand how they can run a business when no one knows what is happening in the parts department

    1. Re:HP itself doesn't know what they are selling by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      It's called an Adaptive Enterprise solution.

  61. Adaptive by The+Unabageler · · Score: 1

    I for one welcome our new adaptive overlords.

    --
    perl -e '$_="\007/4`\cp%2,".chr(127);s/./"\"\\c$&\""/gees; print'
  62. To Sum Up by AdmiralNanook · · Score: 1

    HP will be entering the ERP consulting market. Possibly with their own product, but not neccesarily.

  63. HP, they are selling inkjet cartridges! by quench · · Score: 1

    are they selling anything else in the meantime?

  64. Re:Software companies and their buzzword generator by I8TheWorm · · Score: 4, Insightful

    You ought to be modded +5 Insightful on that one. As a professional developer, I'm sick of PHB's buying into the white-shoed-salesman jargon. At JPMorgan Chase, my PHB bought a $200,000 "system" from Cisco for handling customer service team e-mails. When it failed miserably, I and another developer wrote an SMTP front end in a matter of weeks (our time cost JMPC $7200) and it had more features.

    Our manager asked why we didn't mention we could do that before, which shocked me. My response was that he never mentioned this new "system" until it was already paid for. We were his programmers, and this was a programming issue. In the future he should consider talking to his programmers before he spent massive sums on ideas.

    He's since been fired.

    --
    Saying Android is a family of phones is akin to saying Linux is a family of PCs.
  65. "WILL WORK FOR FOOD" by freejamesbrown · · Score: 1

    in today's landscape, being able to work with the latest buzz-compliant languages and solutions is absolutely key to being competitive.

    pointy-haired bosses will be wooed by clever commercials to spend money on solutions using the latest woodad.

    sure, you can get a job programming foxpro. there's a guy down the hall from me that is a foxpro guru.

    but... if you're a contract programmer, you can't sit on ancient tech. otherwise you'll get paid crap and be forced to take lame contracts.

    at least working with The Next Big Thing (tm) gives you choices.
    m.

  66. Everyone knows what HP sells by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Ink.

  67. the T by sstory · · Score: 3, Funny

    After reading that interview, I feel it's appropriate to quote Mr. T: "Ain't got TIME fo no JIBBA JABBA!"

  68. She, not he by SuperBanana · · Score: 1
    He must have gone to college with

    Except that the Senior VP from HP in the article is a woman. Of course, C|Net certainly buried that by only putting her name+picture in the non-print version of the article and not using her name anywhere in print(I smell something foul here, but anyway).

    Look on the bright side, at least you didn't call -Fiorina- a man(she's probably the best known female executive in the world today aside from maybe Oprah or Martha Stewart. Not that it's a good thing though- she's somewhat regarded as slightly off her rocker after the whole merger thing- talk about fanatical).

  69. dynamic and virtual by arth1 · · Score: 1
    I listened to the Carly Fiorina webcast on Adaptive Enterprise. Her response to every question about it was like "In the future, everyting will be dynamic and virtual".

    Seriously, what the fuck does that mean?


    "In the future, everything will change and won't really exist".

    HTH, HAND,
    --
    *Art
  70. Marketspeak is inherent by metal_priest · · Score: 0

    I have given up on getting any info out of marketting people.
    "Stripped of all the jargon and market-speak" would make sense to anybody. It might even make sense to a learned-by-doing marketer. However if the person has an MBA and has worked in an industry for a few years their ability to produce a non-fluffy reply disappears.
    I think the inherent problem is that these people feel insecure about saying what they they actually think or how they feel on a subject. Years of making things look pretty and downplaying any flaws make them unable to give an opinion about anything half-way important.
    I'm taking some business courses as an option to my CSC degree. It's quite frustrating. Everytime I ask a marketing person a direct question(about anything), they avoid it. They all give me a bunch of fluf and top it up with a salesman's smile. It's bloody annoying and it doesn't even seem that they do it to me on purpose.

  71. This is a gem! Way to go Carly! by zerofoo · · Score: 2, Insightful

    I said this two years ago when I first heard about the HP Compaq merger. HP has strengths that Compaq could not make better (calculators, printing, medical and engineering diagnostic tools come to mind).

    These companies also had severe weaknesses (desktop PCs and x86 servers) that the merger only made worse. Can anyone point to a product or service from either company that became stronger/better with the merger?

    Instead of spewing buzzwords, this VP should step aside and let engineers run HP the way it was run in the past. Carly and Co. are so fixated on the boring low-margin businesses (PC based stuff) that they are ruining the company. It happened to SGI and now it's happening to HPQ. Stay away from this company while Carly and Co. are running it. They can't beat Dell or IBM.

  72. I need HP for this? (Re:Not nearly as bad as...) by fredjflintstone · · Score: 1

    > I can tell you in the Enterprise space 10 years > ago, folks used to get excited about being able to > add new products to their IT systems within 6 > months (I kid you not). The notion of AE is that > it should be measured in days. I'm sure some day > it'll be down to hours or even minutes. apt-get install new-program

  73. Wow by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Calling the emporer naked... that's got to be a high risk career strategy for a "mainstream" tech journalist. Big up your chest mate!

  74. Done before..... by hughk · · Score: 1
    .bomb = virtual profit!

    Regrettably when yyou actually want to convert that to cash terms, the result is zero, hense the dot bomb economy. Fiorina should stick to selling ink.

    --
    See my journal, I write things there
  75. This guy just don't get it. by frogsarefriendly · · Score: 0

    That post was just a bunch of PHB marketing-speak. Microsoft is behind it.

  76. be fair by Crag · · Score: 5, Insightful

    I hate to spring to the defense of Big Corporations, but it's really not that hard to interpret Marketsp'aek positively:

    "I define AE as a business strategy for customers who want to respond in real time to changes affecting their business."

    My translation: AE is (an expensive product which helps companies setup) a business strategy under which trends trigger actions. The use of 'business strategy' sounds meaningless, but it's actually two words which imply two paragraphs. 'Strategy' in this case is an overloaded term referring to a collection of tools, policies, and proceedures.

    The use of 'real time' in business means something very different from its meaning in computer science. It means 'today' instead of 'eventually'. I work for a large media company with an animal for a mascot, and it takes us years to respond to changes in the marketplace. Most of our innertia is rooted in size, conservative management, and fear of risk. However, if we had a system of automation which identified potentially interesting changes in the marketplace, especially in merchandising, it could save us a lot of money.

    For example, how much should we invest in online sales, and how much in more traditional sales? We make money from both, now, so it's a very serious question. A missed sale is a lost sale, but there's no point in trying to extract blood from a turnip. We have people who try to figure out where the tastiest blood is, but they are limited by their tools and proceedures. This AE might actually be just the thing they need.

    I don't know if AE is any good, or if it's what it claims to be, but I do know that marketing speak CAN have a real meaning in a marketing context. When we geeks ridicule the suits for talking gibberish, it's no better than when they ridicule us for our acronyms, l33t, tech talk and other not-quite-english that we use. "We aggregate packet-based transactions, over-selling a large pipe to small nodes who could collectively saturate that pipe, but in practice don't" would mean nothing to a marketing type, but to an ISP sysadmin it's her raison d'etre.

    If we hope to make any progress in the things that really matter (digital freedom), we need to learn to communicate with these people. Their protocols may be bad, but it works for them, and marketing types don't have firmware upgrades, so we need to learn to speak their protocols if we hope to route any traffic through them, or to comandeer them for our noble purposes. :)

    1. Re:be fair by sacrilicious · · Score: 0, Troll
      I don't know if AE is any good, or if it's what it claims to be, but I do know that marketing speak CAN have a real meaning in a marketing context. When we geeks ridicule the suits for talking gibberish, it's no better than when they ridicule us for our acronyms... If we hope to make any progress in the things that really matter (digital freedom), we need to learn to communicate with these people.

      I confess not to know what the term "digital freedom" means in the context of this discussion, but I will comment on your suggestion that there's a burden on engineers to bridge the communication gap with marketers. If engineers are the people who truly know how product X works, and can't comprehend what marketers are saying about X without a substantial effort, then it seems to me that executives at other companies who are trying to understand what X is and why they should buy it don't stand a chance in hell of getting what they think they might be paying for.

      --
      - First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then ???, then profit.
    2. Re:be fair by vmfedor · · Score: 0, Troll
      Of course, but realize that AE isn't a product being engineered by a team of geeks sitting behind desks somewhere. AE is a business strategy for your IT department.


      It is my understanding that AE is simply a huge megacorporation like Compaq/HP or IBM promising that they will help you keep on top of whatever trend is coming into play this week and help you achieve your IT and business needs as quickly as possible. Be it hardware, software, manpower, or research, they'll be there to help you grab the juiciest share of business you can when a new fad in the marketplace rolls around.


      I could be wrong (after all, these are salesmen we're talking about ;) but I think I hit it pretty well on the head.

      --

      I like my women how I like my sugar.. granulated.

    3. Re:be fair by ahem · · Score: 1

      Really well said. Not much to contribute here, other than than.

      --
      Not A Sig
    4. Re:be fair by sacrilicious · · Score: 1
      It is my understanding that AE is simply a huge megacorporation like Compaq/HP or IBM promising that they will help you keep on top of whatever trend is coming into play this week and help you achieve your IT and business needs as quickly as possible. Be it hardware, software, manpower, or research, they'll be there to help you grab the juiciest share of business you can when a new fad in the marketplace rolls around.

      If this is accurate, this would be fundamentally a service, rather than a specific hardware or software product. But it's odd that HP doesn't confirm or deny that it is a service:

      Q: In the broadest definition it just sounds as if this is another form of services business where you want to make money. You're not selling new hardware or software--it's services.

      A: We're entering a new decade of computing--whatever it is called.

      Moreover, this would be a service that does not address any problem more specific than the need to keep up with "whatever trend is coming". Being non-specific is essentially what the interviewer lambastes the HP rep for. So I'm a bit puzzled at your seeming acknowledgement of the interviewer's assessment of HP's vagueness, while simultaneously you reject the interviewer's criticism that HP is being vague.
      --
      - First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then ???, then profit.
    5. Re:be fair by liveD+ehT · · Score: 1

      "A missed sale is a lost sale, but there's no point in trying to extract blood from a turnip. We have people who try to figure out where the tastiest blood is, but they are limited by their tools and proceedures." I'm likely not the only person who laughed really heartily at the use of bloodletting as an example related to media companies!

    6. Re:be fair by mysticalreaper · · Score: 1

      they will help you keep on top of whatever trend is coming into play this week and help you achieve your IT and business needs as quickly as possible.

      Yeah, this seems to be as close of a summary as i can get about what this AE initiative is. But you know what? that's just business. There's absolutely no reason you need HP or IBM or Sun to help you do that. Any business needs to do this to survive. All businesses need to change, most need computer systems to match their needs... It appears HP wants to do some constulting, but to get clients they're telling their potential customers that HP are the one who should be doing the thinking, not your company. This is not a fundamentally bad idea, outsourcing in this sytle has been goin on for far longer than computers are around.

      What's really baffling is how baffling they make it. If even a tech journalist with a vested interest in understanding the industry can't make heads or tails of it, what is HP trying to do? Confuse people into giving them money? That's certainly an interesting plan, if it's true.

    7. Re:be fair by dasmegabyte · · Score: 1

      marketing speak CAN have a real meaning in a marketing context

      Or as we rhetoric majors say, "Total fucking bullshit can have meaning in a total fucking bullshit context."

      (We always say clever things like this. Then we talk about paradigms and Noam Chomsky until you walk away.)

      --
      Hey freaks: now you're ju
    8. Re:be fair by beboploco · · Score: 1

      Some of the HP Adaptive Enterprise / IBM On Demand/ Sun N1 messages are solidly based on common sense stuff like automating IT management. Some of it is related to emerging business models like "capacity/infrastructure/etc. on demand" that aren't necessarily well established now. Some of it is based on stuff industry research labs have been saying are some of the next big things for about 3-4 years now, but are entirely unproven: IT provisioning tied to "business logic", "utility computing" outsourced data centers where shared resource pools are dynamically reassigned among customers according to demand and service level agreements, and so on. Even the people asked to research/design/implement/market this stuff seem to have a hard time getting a handle on what they're really doing, in part because the goals are so lofty and vague, and in part because few people seem to have an idea how the dodgier parts will really be solved (or why a new approach is even needed).

    9. Re:be fair by billtom · · Score: 1

      I think that the problem is that the more concrete parts of what she's saying, like the quote of her's that you singled out, are motherhood and apple pie. That is, it's not something that anyone would disagree with and it's something that everyone of HP's competitors says that they also do with their enterprise system.

      Do you want your IT systems to allow you to swiftly and automatically or semi-automatically react to changes in your business? Of course you do. Everybody does.

      The problem is that she doesn't in any way explain how HP's products do that. Or even how they do it better than products by Sun or IBM or EDS or Microsoft or...

      I think that that's what Cooper was trying to get at by asking essentially the same question over and over again. Not that she wasn't able to articulate what businesses want from IT, but that she wasn't able to explain how HP products achieve that.

    10. Re:be fair by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Why is this modded down as a troll?

    11. Re:be fair by vmfedor · · Score: 1

      That's not true, my parent poster was taking the angle of "this is a product that is manufactured by engineers." This isn't a physical device, it appears to be a service offered by HP, therefor all normal rules of design go out the window.

      --

      I like my women how I like my sugar.. granulated.

    12. Re:be fair by sacrilicious · · Score: 1

      Whoops, I missed the fact that the original parent post was from a different person. Sorry 'bout that. :)

      --
      - First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then ???, then profit.
  77. HEY WAKE UP YOU FOOL! by frogsarefriendly · · Score: 0

    It was Timothy this time, but it did sound like one of Michael's stupid comments in there.

  78. overrated mods observation by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Is there some gang moderation abuse going on here or what?

    1. Re:overrated mods observation by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Overrated mods are the most abused form of moderation. See, the "overrated" mod is not submitted for meta-moderation, probably because of the book-keeping required to present the info to the M2 moderator. That is, you have to know what the current moderation level was at the time the "overrated" moderation was made. Something may be "overrated" when it has score 5, but not when it has score 3. It really floors me when I see somebody use an "overrated" mod on a post that has a 0 or a 1. I don't think anything can be "overrated" with a score of 0.

      Essentially, "overrated" (and also underrated) are what cowardly moderators use when they want to change somebody's score, usually because they don't like the person or disagree with the poster's opinion, but don't want to open themselves up to meta moderation.

  79. Re:This is a gem! Way to go Carly! by exhilaration · · Score: 2, Funny
    Can anyone point to a product or service from either company that became stronger/better with the merger?

    Their Adaptive Enterprise technology is certainly impressive.

  80. As long as they don't say... by JeffTL · · Score: 1

    ..."proven TCO and ROI," a phrase designed for the acronymically inept. You can perhaps prove return on investment (if something repeatedly tends to pay for itself), but isn't total cost of ownership irrelevant without a quantifier? "Low TCO," or "TCO $5000 for lifetime of five years," are actual worthwhile data.

    1. Re:As long as they don't say... by Xeger · · Score: 1

      Furthermore, if I improve that something has an astronomically high Total Cost of Ownership -- let's say I find out that my '88 Honda Accord will cost me $175,000 to maintain over the coming year -- well, have I not established a "proven TCO?"

      In the same vein, I could prove that Windows Server 2003 costs me more money than I spent to buy a license...thus, I have "proven" the ROI to be less than 1:1!

      As if the acronyms weren't bad enough, the phrase "proven TCO and ROI" carries no information as to whether the TLAs are proven GOOD or proven BAD. Thus, it is an empty phrase, utterly devoid of informational content. Much like Carly Fiorina's mind.

  81. Re:Artical Summary by PCM2 · · Score: 1
    It sounds like a shift towards a consulting/service business model as hardware becomes a commodity.
    And, sadly, even that is nothing new. IBM did it years ago.
    It's advice. It's probably biased. And while it's probably better than what you'd get from a dozen O'reilly books at a tenth of a percent of the cost, it's not a magic box that you plug in so no one has to code anymore.
    Not "better." I've gotten advice from such people, and in some case I've been the little Oz guy behind the scenes who's actually giving the advice. Opinions are like assholes. The difference here is that the advice you'll be getting is speciically tailored to your business. You can't tell an O'Reilly book how many servers you have, so it can't spell out exactly how many adaptive synergies you should buy.
    --
    Breakfast served all day!
  82. The real answer... by dpbsmith · · Score: 1

    ...to questions like "What is SAA?" "what is digital_nervous_system?" "What is (Wang's) Office 2000?" "What is Microsoft Back Office?" "What is .NET?" etc. etc. is always the name of some particular almost-upper-level manager who just got put in charge of some substantial chunk of the organization. In addition to being able to brag about how many thousand people he/she now has "working for him," he/she gets to pick some spiffy name for the grab-bag of projects that he/she now "owns."

    What the grab-bag has in common is not any well-defined set of technical characteristics, but the fact that a single person is managing them.

    Therefore, the grab-bag of projects is said to be directed at whatever set of goals that person thinks are now relevant or will sell well.

    What the reporter should have asked is: what's the name of the person that is in charge of "Adaptive Enterprise?"

    If the grab-bag of stuff does well, the person in charge will stay in charge and terminology will remain stable. If it doesn't do all that well, the person will change, the name will change, and the color scheme and typography of the brochures describing it will change.

    1. Re:The real answer... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      "What the reporter should have asked is: what's the name of the person that is in charge of "Adaptive Enterprise?""

      Mark Linesh is the head of the Adaptive Enterprize program office, and he reports to Nora, who runs HP's software bussiness.

  83. Re:Software companies and their buzzword generator by asdfghjklqwertyuiop · · Score: 1

    He's since been fired

    The PHB, or that guy who actually did something useful?

  84. Re:Software companies and their buzzword generator by asdfghjklqwertyuiop · · Score: 1

    Funny you should mention bullshit generators...

  85. The Ultimate OS Flamewar Challenge by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    In carefully thinking my options through with regard to the most well known operating systems that a home "power user" might choose to work with, I've formulated the following axiom regarding usability:

    Linux is to Windows as Windows is to Mac OS (Pre OS X).

    What this means is left to the reader to determine and will obviously vary depending on which OS you prefer. Example:

    A Mac user would see it this way:

    Hardest is to Hard as Hard is to Easy

    A Linux user would see it this way:

    Least obfuscated is to Obfuscated as Obfuscated is to Most Obfuscated

    A Windows user would see it this way:

    "What was the question? Oooooh shiny!"

    Let the flamefest begin!

  86. be fair-Empathy. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Bingo! And just to be fair. They could make the effort to understand the geek perspective. After all it's easy to be an island in the stream. It's harder to build bridges. Anyway one has to wonder if geeks inability to "swing the lingo" is tied to poor social skills? Remember part of social skills is empathy. Being able to parallel to a degree what's going on in the other persons head. A necessary trait when one is gauging both what to do, when to do it, and how effective it is. It's also part of both the GUI and documentation process.

    "If we hope to make any progress in the things that really matter (digital freedom), we need to learn to communicate with these people."

    The same could be said for Lawyers, Politicians, as well as Managment.

  87. CALCULATORS! by HarveyBirdman · · Score: 1
    Where is the next generation of RPN calculators for engineers?

    And, *NO*, PDAs or PocketPCs are not adequate substitutes.

    And were Carly Fiorina and Edie Falco separated at birth?

    --
    --- Ban humanity.
    1. Re:CALCULATORS! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0
    2. Re:CALCULATORS! by HarveyBirdman · · Score: 1

      Same old, same old.

      --
      --- Ban humanity.
  88. Re:Software companies and their buzzword generator by joabj · · Score: 1
    I had one company marketing exec talk to me for twenty minutes about a revolutionary new platform that could help customers tie together disparate back-end applications and on and on.


    After about 20 minutes I caught on. "So you're introducing an application server then?"


    "Umm, yes" I don't think he would have said the words "application server" once if I hadn't asked.


    Companies do this more and more these days. I think it may be that they don't want to backslide into a commodity market.

  89. One slipped through! by PCM2 · · Score: 1

    Dammit! Just when I thought I'd finally achieved maximum penetration, it seems someone hasn't read my comic strip yet. (See below.)

    --
    Breakfast served all day!
    1. Re:One slipped through! by AvengerXP · · Score: 1

      Remember, don't be *the bottleneck*

      Hahahah good one chief

      --
      Trolls dont like to be Flamebait, because they burn so well. Protect our Troll heritage!
  90. Re:Software companies and their buzzword generator by jorlando · · Score: 1

    "He's since been fired."

    God... I loved that part... you must work in heaven...

    Its too good... one more time:

    "He's since been fired."

    yeah :-)

  91. Damned, dirty troll. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    I only take pleasure in your comment because it is assured that w/ your attitude you will never be successful.

    1. Re:Damned, dirty troll. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Wow, you compressed a four letter word into a two letter abbreviation. Too bad you could have saved even more space by not posting your inane drivel.

  92. a little insider info by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    HP has been pretty aggressive in building up their consulting arm. Actually our group, a desktop management department of a few hundred people, are in the works to be bought out by HP. I won't name anything but the software we use was actually acquired by IBM and therefore a major competitor to HP. Kind of ironic that way.

  93. "WILL WORK FOR FOOD"-Java Break. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    "at least working with The Next Big Thing (tm) gives you choices."

    We'll be programming using donut holes. And if that fails on can always end up working at a coffee shop.

    ***
    <?xml version="1.0" standalone="no"?>

    <!DOCTYPE svg PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD SVG 1.0//EN"

    "http://www.w3.org/TR/2001/REC-SVG-200 10904/DTD/svg10.dtd">

    <svg width="500" height="500">

    <defs>

    </defs>

    <line x1="0%" y1="0%" x2="100%" y2="100%"style="stroke-dasharray:19;stroke:rgb(0,0 ,0);stroke-width:600"/>

    <line x1="100%" y1="0%" x2="0%" y2="100%" style="stroke-dasharray:19;fill:none;stroke:rgb(0, 0,0);stroke-width:600"/>

    </svg>

  94. Oh, the humanity! by Medievalist · · Score: 1
    Wow, good non-point. I take it you're one of those annoying folks who thinks everyting is too mainstream? You seem to be assuming that people only use .NET technologies because of the fancy buzzwords.

    Let me guess, you hate most popular music and instead tell everyone how much you love the "Screaming Frog Orgasms", "The Wicket Pence Dog Sperms", or some other fringe group that people bring up when they want to show how elevated their tastes are?
    Yes, absolutely. Your incisive analysis of my post has left me flopping about the office in epileptic fits of self-relevation.

    I'll have to listen to some "Wet Onion" music to calm myself now (as soon as I wipe the spittle off my all-black clothing).

    1. Re:Oh, the humanity! by ProtonMotiveForce · · Score: 1

      And I must admit that your subtly ironic retort has forced me, in turn, to assess the strength of my own arguments.

      I read this, and was pleased that you had agreed with me, until about 20 minutes later I had a revelation that you were being sarcastic. This successful reproach has forced me to reevaluate my point of view (and, dare I say, my sexual orientation).

  95. Is it just software companies? by shmert · · Score: 3, Insightful

    It strikes me that this is more about branding than anything. What sets any big-name real world product apart from its identical counterpart? The brand name.

    Imagine an interviewer with a Nike exec, asking why consumers should pay more for their products than a functionally equivalent (maybe even better-built) shoe. I doubt the suit would even acknowledge such a question as being valid. It is not a question companies feel obligated to answer.

    It seems that software companies are behind the game with respect to their peers in tangible goods in this aspect, but expect to see a lot more of this stuff. It sounds to me like HP is really just beginning to construct their own .Net bandwagon. Just as with physical products, corporations know that it's not about the quality of the product, or the list of features. It's about brand saturation and recognition. If someone sees a billboard for product A 100X more often than product B, some gullible part of his mind believes that product A is better. Who cares what it does?

    --
    You drank my drink, you drunk!
  96. careful now by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    The cowardly overrating moderation abuse gang might get hold of you.

  97. It gets better by gillbates · · Score: 1

    We've spent $2.5 billion in Adaptive Enterprise...

    And earlier on:

    It's a business strategy for customers...

    So basically, if I understand it correctly, HP has spent 2.5 billion dollars on a business strategy. Just like the dot-coms, they spend a load of cash and don't have anything tangible to show for it.

    But it gets worse. Here's another quote:

    You pay for what you use. You get to dynamically redeploy assets to something that's more important than what they're on right now.

    This is virtually plagiarized from an IBM whitepaper for their S/390 and z/OS series mainframes. The big selling point of the mainframe was that you didn't have to buy more capacity than you actually needed; the system would prioritize processes so that you got the most out of your IT dollar.

    So, I think HP's headed for the toilet. The merger with Compaq killed off the business ethics of the former HP. Kind of sad, too, because they used to make really good machines (their laserjet printers come to mind).

    --
    The society for a thought-free internet welcomes you.
  98. .NET name history by hsenag · · Score: 2, Interesting

    The internal codename for what became .NET was NGWS, standing for Next Generation Windows Services. Apparently one reason this codename was picked was that it was such a horrible name that it would force people to think of something better! Anyway, nothing better was found until literally the Friday before the Monday release - so .NET was chosen in rather a hurry overnight. I don't think anyone inside Microsoft (I was an intern there at the time) was particularly happy with it, but it was the best they could come up with.

  99. Re:I need HP for this? (Re:Not nearly as bad as... by X · · Score: 1

    You misunderstand what I mean by new products. I'm not talking about new software. I'm talking about whatever widget/service the company sells.

    --
    sigs are a waste of space
  100. The Target example by defile · · Score: 1

    This is a new way of saying BUSINESS PROCESS AUTOMATION. "It used to take 5 days to report a credit card stolen! Now it only takes 1 minute!".

    Obviously before that Target was mailing (or maybe faxing--ooh cutting edge) stolen card reports to all relevant departments so that they can update their databases. Now the person taking the report pushes a button and all of the databases are automagically updated.

    Big freaking deal. An MCSE fresh out of college could solve that problem.

    HP just came up with a purposefully vague, impressive sounding INNOVATIVE BUSINESS STRATEGY that they could apply to any business problem: Step 1: tell us about the problem, Step 2: give us the money, Step 3: maybe we solve the problem!!!!!

    REVOLUTIONARY!

  101. Sad Commentary by ssafarik · · Score: 1

    Isn't it sad that reporting on business is in such a state that one modestly antagonistic interview gets such attention? Granted that it's nice to see someone do more than just publish the newswire feed as given to them, but it would be better if that were the norm.

    Steve.

  102. It Won't Last by sfjoe · · Score: 1

    ...the normally fawning technology business press actually takes an HP VP to task for the extremely vague statements...

    Right about now, the marketing wankers at HP are on the phone with their advertising agency. Immediately following will be a phone call from the ad agency to the sales department at CNet and that will be the last time this reporter dares to ask tough quesitons. He must be new.
    It might be interesting, though, to see if this story actually stays up on the website.

    --
    It's simple: I demand prosecution for torture.
  103. Carly's HP does it again (does nothing) by happy_place · · Score: 1

    Carly's just an Enron-ian dinosaur. She comes from the school of "who needs a product" (or honesty) in order to sell stuff. Reading this brought back painful memories when I would sit at HP and listen to her talk about how great everything was... and afterwards we'd ask the question, "So what exactly is E-speak?" Nobody knew. Carly (and the management she's henpecked) have a core-honesty issue. Be vague, but speak confidently, and you can always back out of whatever direction you want to take things. I used to think I just didn't get it. Then again I never understood how Enron could claim to make money, or how Sun could just give away hardware (to be the dot in the dotcom) and make money. Turns out none of them were... Further, HP has a terrible reputation for picking bad standards that go nowhere fast. So if you do go with AE you'll probably be cursing yourself a year or two after you write them the check, because you're stuck with obsolete and unsupported hardware/software solutions. Go with AE if you like, but consider that if this is how they talk about it, how will they talk to you when it comes to delivering a product that you actually need in "real-time". (as opposed to all that copious fake-time)

    --
    http://www.beanleafpress.com
  104. I have to ask: by AB3A · · Score: 2, Insightful
    It may communicate with some MBAs but most techies won't have a clue. There isn't some specific technology that will give you an "adaptive enterprise". Even worse, most of what they are propose won't really do the job. However the vagueness is somewhat justified because what keeps most companies from being adaptive to changing market environments isn't technical or even financial, but rather sociological and psychological


    Recognizing that you have experience I do not (no, I don't have an MBA), what sociological or psychological message are they sending? When MBAs talk to these folks, what do they understand that I, with my Electrical Engineering background, just don't get?
    --
    Nearly fifty percent of all graduates come from the bottom half of the class!
    1. Re:I have to ask: by JGski · · Score: 1
      What HP is talking about is creating an adaptive supply chain, where financial and inventory risk are dynamically controlled through a multivariate risk set of buying and selling processes. Technology is part of the way you do this but it's not the biggest barrier to success.

      The problem is that while this can be shown to be a mathematically optimal strategy, it would also requires fundamental change in organizational structure and control (the sociological element) which won't happen in most companies because of the impact on middle and executive level managements' roles, power and responsibilities (the psychological element).

      My own personal view is that most managers would sooner run a company into the ground that have their own oxes' gored. In comparison to this barrier, technology and finances are utterly trivial.

      Beyond this, it also ignores where most of the cost and process impediment in a company comes from (it's not the core supply chain), which, I think, is the fatal flaw of HP's "AE" strategy.

      JGski

    2. Re:I have to ask: by AB3A · · Score: 1

      Just out of curiosity then, where do these multiple variables defining risk come from?

      Yes, this process may be mathematically optimal. However, the data going in to it may not be. Could this be why so many managers think the idea is nonsense?

      And if this is what HP is chasing, is there any hope for them?

      --
      Nearly fifty percent of all graduates come from the bottom half of the class!
    3. Re:I have to ask: by JGski · · Score: 1
      The underlying variables are inventory levels (I(n)). The risk variables are linked to liquidation/acquisition of inventory (k(n) * dI(n)/dt). These k values include speed of exchange, margin, mix of inventories, manufacturing performance parameters, and various market inputs. The result is that the aggregate portfolio of inventories has better return on assets and investment that any individual strategy.

      To control risk and return you control the flow of inventory through a number of buying and selling processes that each have varying risk. For example: auctioning inventory has high margin risk but low transaction speed/inventory risk, while long term delivery contracts have lower margin risk but high transaction speed/inventory risk.* If MBA-ers can be comfortable with currency hedging to protect product margins, this isn't much of a leap.

      Are the input variables precisely known? Of course not. This is economics, not engineering. In general, even if they were, none of the equations governing even basic statistical inventory models for a single asset have closed form solutions. Instead one must use adaptive stochastic control systems, monitored by people (hopefully).

      Again, personally, I think it's risky to assume that 1) people can change psychologically and organizations can change sociologically to what this type of business model really means. If you have to be able to switch between a long-term contract-based sales and auction sales model at the whim of market forces, humans necessarily must become a sheddable asset like computer keyboards! 2) that making a business non-people-centric is a risky operational decoupling. The old, now abandoned, HP Way was entirely human-centric. The new HP Way is not human -centric. 3) HP's value proposition and core competency has always been technological execution and excellence. HP's management started telling employees by words and deeds: "you are aren't good enough or smart enough to take us into the next generation" even though the real problem was that management forgot how technology develops - it's as much luck as planning.

      However, this is the stated business model HP has chosen, in lieu of its traditional strategy of technology leadership "at the bowling alley" to use Geoffrey Moore's model of technology adoption. As one of the HP boardmembers naively boasted a few years ago: "we'll let Intel do hardware R&D, Microsoft do software R&D and we'll own the supply chain." And then you think of Dell, and try to imagine what it would take to beat and pound HP into a Dell, and then what it would take to be necessarily better than a Dell. I'm just glad I don't work at HP anymore. It's values have become as alien to Bill & Daves' vision as SCO has from its.

      JGski

      * a lesson not learned in the California power deregulation crisis a few years back, when first we suffered from going pure-auction, and then whiplashed to pure long-term contract. Both strategies are non-optimal when used alone. Every time I open my electric bill I see how non-optimal!

  105. HP is just Indians pretending to be a US company by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    I consulted at HP for a while. Co-workers were being told things like they would only get funding for a project if the agreed only to hire H-1b worders from India (no Russians or Chinese need apply).

    HP isn't the same company it used to be-the only parts of the company that make money is are the printer and server divisions. The respect for the engineering staff from the old days is gone. When the public figures out what HP has become, this company will go down the tubes.

  106. Re:Software companies and their buzzword generator by I8TheWorm · · Score: 1

    Eventually both. That team I was on was replaced by much more expensive ABAPers.... seems the new manager wasn't so bright either.

    --
    Saying Android is a family of phones is akin to saying Linux is a family of PCs.
  107. Re:Software companies and their buzzword generator by RALE007 · · Score: 1
    AC Wrote:

    Every software company is guilty of this. A program that does general ledger and billing sounds much sexier when called a "best-of-breed integrated calculation solution, designed to drive your business into the 21st century and beyond." And a server-monitoring tool sounds better when you call it a "proactive fault-finding and troubleshooting environment, making your data center fully autonomic and self-healing."

    Personally, "A program that does general ledger and billing." and "A server-monitoring tool." Sounds much better than: "best-of-breed integrated calculation solution, designed to drive you business into the 21st century and beyond." and "proactive fault-finding and troubleshooting environment, making your data center fully autonomic and self-healing."

    Maybe I'm cocky, but those who may actually be interested in the products probably like the original naming convention better as well. I think the only people impressed by the "flashy" second descriptions are pointy haired managerial types.

    That said, the descriptions given by the VP, which are similar to your flashy examples, appear as nothing but lame PR/Marketing that distort the hell out of something I might have had interest in. If I could first figure out what the hell it is. I think HP needs to burn a few brain cells and think about who might actually want to buy their products and services and speak to them in their own language (English works pretty good for me) instead of expecting them to decipher this bunk. Using skewed PR/Marketing fluff may work wonders if your in Fiorina's inner circle, but here in the Real World (TM), it sounds ridiculous.

    --
    Beware blue cats moving at .99c
  108. Re:Software companies and their buzzword generator by butane_bob2003 · · Score: 1

    Love it when the fire the management types. Usually they just move them around laterally or allow them to resign and collect a large severence package. When the higher ups start talking meaningless marketing speak nonsense, I start to wonder where all the work us engineers have done is heading, and what kind of crap they are getting us into. I talk with my CEO somewhere on the order of an hour a month. These conversations are somewhat limited, she would rather see engineers clocking billable hours on boring/pointless/mismanaged client projects than doing R&D do improve our software or discussing business/technology strategy, which we all know is the job of the CIOs, not the developers/engineers.

    --


    TallGreen CMS hosting
  109. -1: Overrated by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    That's what I'd mod you if I had points today...

  110. HP isn't selling anything to us... by tdk2fe · · Score: 3, Insightful

    I think all this clamor over the way Nora has presented HP's AE exposes the void between management and IT people. The people that have the potential and desire (not to mention the need) to understand what a system like "Adaptive Enterprise" actually is are not the people in charge of whether or not a company is going to adopt that system.

    While HP has made mistakes, they are by no means a stupid company. They pay people a lot of money to tell them what they need to say to make anything sound good. And they know that by using this vague and seemingly cutting-edge vocabulary in their speeches that its going to appeal to those who make the decisions about what sort of system they need to use (IE not engineers working in the IT dept).

    This interview is unique in that a top-ranking VP from HP was forced to answer some technical questions about the way her product works. She probably has no idea how AE works, and you couldn't explain it to her in terms she understands because like many others have said she doesn't understand "tech talk". What she does understand is what to tell the people in charge to get them to buy into her idea. That's her job. When they get a company interested and go to close the sale, they probably send a few techies along with some salespeople to explain to some managers IT pet that their product really is worth it.

    I personally think this interview was unfair. It would be like interviewing a programmer at microsoft about what he see's for the future of the company, what directions they are taking, etc... He'd probably be just as dumbfounded. Before the interview, it even says "CNET News.com recently met with Nora Denzel, senior vice president of HP's Adaptive Enterprise, to find out what she sees on the IT horizon from the computing giant's perspective." I dont recall anything in the interview regarding the future of HP and where they want to go, but instead trying to bleed technical details out of a marketing rep.

    The article should have been titled "Investigation into the details of HP's new Adaptive Enterprise Solutions" and then maybe HP would have been given a fair chance to represent themselves.

    1. Re:HP isn't selling anything to us... by Lord_Dweomer · · Score: 1
      " This interview is unique in that a top-ranking VP from HP was forced to answer some technical questions about the way her product works. She probably has no idea how AE works, and you couldn't explain it to her in terms she understands because like many others have said she doesn't understand "tech talk". "

      Then perhaps that is not a good position for her. When you are at that level, you need to be prepared for contact with the media. In fact, many PR firms train these executives as to how to answer to media questions. If you cannot handle speaking on behalf of the company, you should not have such a high position with them, because with that position comes the responsibility to be part of their public face.

      So while its understandable that she might not know the technical aspects of this, I don't see any excuse why she didn't have a watered down metaphor for it that would let people easily see what the technical things meant. There is no excuse for just being able to spew marketing lingo. Marketing lingo may be important to marketing, but it doesn't mean thats ALL you should know, especially if you're a VP.

      And just so you know, I work in advertising/marketing, and am disgusted by this interview. The reason Slashdot has such a negative view of marketing people is because of people like this executive, who have no real intelligence to back up their words.

      --
      Buy Steampunk Clothing Online!
  111. Re:Software companies and their buzzword generator by I8TheWorm · · Score: 1

    she would rather see engineers clocking billable hours on boring/pointless/mismanaged client projects than doing R&D do improve our software or discussing business/technology strategy, which we all know is the job of the CIOs, not the developers/engineers

    I've seen more of that in my career than I'd care to mention too. On that SMTP project, we could have beat the deadline and come in WAY under budget. After all, the cisco "system" was nothing more than software. What do these companies think developers are paid to do? If written in house, there are no middlemen in the form of salesmen and project managers, nor is there any markup to keep someone elses building's lights on.

    I hope someone else has a different experience, but the developer role in corporations seems to lean closer and closer to that of system support.

    --
    Saying Android is a family of phones is akin to saying Linux is a family of PCs.
  112. Re:Software companies and their buzzword generator by buckeyeguy · · Score: 1

    W00t! My 'bullshit bingo' card just filled up! Must be management in the room somewhere...

    --
    I'd have a personalized plate on my car, but "toxic bachelor" won't fit into 7 letters.
  113. Re:Software companies and their buzzword generator by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    This sounds like an action-packed episode of BOFH

  114. Re:Software companies and their buzzword generator by butane_bob2003 · · Score: 1

    Well, I think it all comes down to the new 'services' model. Software companies that have moved away from exorbitant licencing fees are attempting to make all money on consulting services and support. The core of the company is still it's software, regardless of what the taglines say about it's services. Even though the actual revenue comes from consulting services, the core of the consulting services is still the software. (can't have one without the other) Complex software needs constant improvement. If the R&D does not continue, software becomes stagnant and falls behind the needs of the user. Especially in open source software, 'vitality' is is one of the top concerns for evaluators. I think the people who are looking at the numbers (upper management) are seeing the services as the only real source of revenue, R&D is just an expense. There only answer to getting 'positive BVA' 'this quarter' is to move more R&D people into services. Working in services puts you closer to the corporate machine where you are expected to dress a certain way, speak a certian way, work more hours and get less done, track every minute of the day, be predictable, etc..

    --


    TallGreen CMS hosting
  115. Answer! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    "As soon as *we* find out, we'll let you know"

  116. Re:Artical Summary by dasmegabyte · · Score: 1

    Hmm. So they'll let you pay them to tell you what HP products to buy.

    Don't their salesmen already do this for free?

    [Das walks into HP lunch counter]
    Dasmb: Hi, I'm hungry.
    Lunch: You should buy a turkey sub.
    Dasmb: OK, that sounds good.
    Lunch: Alright, that'll be $130
    Dasmb: [gurgling noise]
    Lunch: Well, one hour minimum of sandwich consulting at $125 per hour, $5 for the sandwich.
    Dasmb: I shall take my business to McDonalds!
    Lunch: Whatever man. They'll just tie you into Big Macs. Our sandwiches are agile, they move at the speed of hunger. Either way, you still owe us $125.

    Then again, I once had a mechanic try to charge me $55 for saying my tires needed air. He does pretty good business because everybody assumes a guy with dirty hands would never lie about car parts.

    --
    Hey freaks: now you're ju
  117. Real productivity-boosters by danila · · Score: 1

    1) Teach your employees Ctrl+C, Ctrl+V and other keyboard shortcuts
    2) Make sure the refresh rate is set to max on all displays, all mice have long cords and there is enough space on every desk
    3) Check that all computers are fast and responsive, anti-virus software doesn't slow PCs down, network is fast
    4) Get a easy to organise e-mail program, like Opera M2
    5) Install an easy information organising tool, like Treepad

    Voila! The first item alone can easily provide 1000% return on investment. Seriously, I don't understand why would anyone start with the hard and expensive solution, when teaching people to use Alt-Tab to switch from a word-process to a spreadsheet would probably make bigger difference.

    --
    Future Wiki -- If you don't think about the future, you cannot have one.
  118. Re:Artical Summary by danila · · Score: 1

    She's talking about selling advice, basicaly.

    A million $ question - how good is HP at giving advice if their VP can't even explain what their doing and be understood? It's like hiring a press-secretary with speech impediment.

    --
    Future Wiki -- If you don't think about the future, you cannot have one.
  119. Re:Software companies and their buzzword generator by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    It's kind of wierd for the press to actually start asking hard questions. Think tanks like Gartner et al live and die by techno-hype.


    The Boston Globe has a section in the Business Part of the Sunday paper that tracks the hot business buzzwords for the week. The mere existence of such a chart speaks volumes about the actual "importance" of such buzzwords, as opposed to their popularity among the MBA set.
  120. Smells like DOT COM again by ToKsUri · · Score: 1

    This smells like the dot com bubble is getting bigger again. Will this time also burst?

  121. Re:Software companies and their buzzword generator by I8TheWorm · · Score: 1

    I couldn't agree more. What burns me is this...

    XYZ services salesman sells ABC company a "system" that "allows forward thinking businesses autonomous connections to all their systems"
    PHB buys the system for tons of money

    PHB talks to his own IT staff about it, and they discover it will mean extra work for them anyway
    They also realize they could have done the same thing easily through web services/xml for a fraction of the cost
    XYZ company's "system" turns out to be a java developer who will require most of the analysis on ABC company's requirements to be done by the ABC company's IT staff while XYZ is billing
    The "system" goes over budget and time, and the deliverable is nothing more than trading of flat files between current systems
    XYZ gets lots of money, and ABC's IT staff get's additional work in supporting the "system"

    I've seen it happen many times over the last 12 years. Each year they come in with a new buzzword or catchphrase for the same old crap. I've threatened to walk into someones office with a competing system for SAP for a fraction of the cost.

    "In this one box, I have a system that will handle every piece of business your company does, all in one repository. All it will require is for you to hire some of our developers for too much money, and have them write some custom code to shape it into your business needs. It's called DB2 (or SQL Server, or Oracle, or...)."

    --
    Saying Android is a family of phones is akin to saying Linux is a family of PCs.
  122. Re:Enterprise Desktops by allrong · · Score: 1

    And here I was thinking that an "Enterprise" desktop was about being a Star Trek fan!

    --
    What is the inverse of the Matrix?
  123. Like I've been saying all along by Archfeld · · Score: 1

    I work for a big company that was previously support by DEC, Compaq, Tandem, HP services, IBM Global services, Sun, and EDS, Since the HP round of mergers (DEC,CPQ,TANDEM, and HP) HAVE GONE DOWN HILL IN ALL MANNERS. Their new equipment fails out of the box OFTEN, their support structure is AWFUL, they can't delevier hardware ontime, with the correct components, their service managers blame everyone from santa claus, the jerk actually blamed christmass demand on why we couldn't get 5312 raid controller ?!?! bet lots of people asked for that one for christmas, to CE showing up with obviously incorrect parts on service calls and blaming logistics. HP is in a sad state of affairs and not likely to get better. Their own service personell hate the place. Carly the Hatchet (secretly employed by IBM) has done her job well. The most successful case of industrail espionage ever :)

    --
    errr....umm...*whooosh* *whoosh* Is this thing on ?
  124. The first person to say "paradigm shift" is full o by qtp · · Score: 1

    I agree.

    I really don't see a problem with the idea that HP is selling a service that is defined differently for each customer according to thier needs and thier already existing assets. Any company that tells you that thier product is going to "revolutionize your business" is full of crap.

    And that brings us to the interviewer, who was the first and only party in that article that violated the universal bullshit detector that I mention in the title of this post.

    --
    Read, L
  125. How the conversation really went: by Skadet · · Score: 1


    Q: Stripped of all the jargon and market-speak, can you succinctly define what Adaptive Enterprise is supposed to be about?

    A: I define AE as a business strategy vis-a-vis customers who concordantly want to respond in real time to changes affecting their business, ergo they buy...

    ...you know what, I have no idea what they hell I'm saying. I just thought it would make me sound cool.

  126. Interesting, though "marketing" today = obstacle by janbjurstrom · · Score: 1
    I agree that we need (to learn) to communicate better with ... that's the thing, isn't it - how and with whom? *users hand-waving vigourously*

    Was/isn't marketing supposed to "fill that gap" between producers and consumers? And we got advertising, we've ended up with info/com/mercials and corporate bullshit as in this latest example from HP. You write:
    ...it's really not that hard to interpret Marketsp'aek positively
    Why, I ask, why the fsk should we have to interpret what corporations say? It's what we get with marketing. Your solution (I could misinterpret) seems to be improving communication with marketing people.

    I say to hell with marketing people and shame on all of us for the utter mess we've created. My bet would be to improve direct communication and cooperation with the people we do business with. Weinberger, Locke, Searls, et al., discuss these matters over at Cluetrain.org. Check it out. (The gist: marketing obfuscate and obstruct real conversation, and advertising is a piss-poor substitute for knowledge creation.)

    What I feel open source (and even more so FSF - GNU) is doing, is fundamentally blur the dividing line between "producer" and "consumer". But even more importantly, the free software (and to some extent, open source) movement(s) spell out, in blazing capitals, very real alternatives to marketing drones, legalese, and commercials. It's called communication, enabled by freedom. To choose, to change, to get to the source, to understand, to create. Source, in this context, is much more than 'just' code.

    Oh so many corporations know not the first goddammed thing about how to communicate with people. They often seem to take *pride* (something like 'we're very excited about our new ad campaign ...') in talking to "the market", as anyone apart from sleeping beauty knows painfully well.
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    668.5
  127. Thank you by janbjurstrom · · Score: 1

    for saying in one sentence what I tried/failed to say in several paragraphs, earlier in this thread.

    Must be something to that rhetowhatchamacallit I've been hearing about.

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    668.5
  128. Now that we are thoroughly off topic by X · · Score: 1

    I ge the screaming heebie-jeebies thinking about a technology that allows "the business" to implement the first thing that comes into their head.

    I don't see that things would change *that* much from how they are now. When a CEO makes a decision on something, he will generally stick to it until completion (or take a job somewhere else), if for no other reason than he/she would lose credibility otherwise. All the important events about whether to go forward with a decision occur *before* the decision is made.

    Now, that being the case, I think one of the reasons why businesses make bad decisions is that they have limited information, and the impact of their decisions have significant delays. You see people move up the ranks by making a splashy "initiative", and then they get promoted or take a higher paying job somewhere and some other sucker has to clean up the mess they left behind.

    The first problem would almost certain be addressed by the same technologies that allow the business to be so flexible in the first place. The same technologies would allow you to quickly and accurately asses the impact and risks of a decision. This would provide "the business" with a far more rational basis to make a decision.

    As to the other problem, I suspect the more responsive a business is to those changes, the faster the feedback. This would probably mean that idiots would have "career changes" sooner, and the rest would learn much more quickly how to make good decisions.

    But I agree that the whole thing could have downsides. Rarely is technology anything but a double edged sword.

    --
    sigs are a waste of space
  129. .Net by siskbc · · Score: 1
    .NET is a marketting term for a safer, easier to use Windows API. It is a set of technologies including a virtual machine and a series of wrappers around DLLs outside of the VM.

    FWIW, I can think of a lot of ads from MS that basically used .Net as a catchphrase to mean anything they wanted to sell to big business. Which seems to be what HP is doing here.

    --

    -Looking for a job as a materials chemist or multivariat

  130. Corporate blitherings by sglines · · Score: 1

    I once asked a women in a bar what she did. She said that she worked at DEC in marketing and that she did, "programmatic development that was educative."

    I almost fell off my barstool laughing.