Slashdot Mirror

No they're not telemarketers, but they are researchers. The people that call during dinner and ask for 'opinions' in efforts to 'improve customer service'.

BRG Research Services
Operation hours:
7:00 a.m. to 10:00 p.m. (MST)
Phone:
(801) 373-9923

Toll free:
(800) 800-8784

Fax:
(801) 374-2751

Address:
50 East 500 North, Suite 200
Provo UT, 84601

Sign them up for mailing lists etc. And JAM their phone lines.

Oh yeah, call the Microsoft Dogs on them. They have illegal copies of Windows , illegally registered copies of winzip (you can tell when the registration name is X and code is obviously hacked). and a multitude of pirated software on their systems.

I know, I work there. And I dont' care of the company goes under. They suck

Hi AtariAmarok

I had the same problem with one of my tapes!

I found the answer at
this website.

Regards

Dr. Nick

That's fine by me, but I don't want to wait for the black spot copy protection.

Yes, sir. That's when I'll give up downloading pirated moves. I will!

Yeah, this would ruin the movie for me too.

You'll feel differently after you've been here.

Wrong again asshat, I have 3 FP's to my record, and they were big ones too (2 Linux articles and a Hellmouth article)...not for some article of a washed up british TV show that no one really gives a fuck about. You young'uns still have got a LONG way to go before you ever catch up to me, since I've been trolling these waters for the last 4 1/2 years. You better go back to fapping in your mom's basement to the goatse.cx page because there is no chance in hell of you ever defeating me.

Of course now the next time I see you, I am not only going to beat the shit out of you, give you a monster wedgie and steal your lunch money, I am also going to piss in your Mountain Dew.

Cheers,
Your worst fear

---
Trolling slashdot since 1999

This man will be the new doctor.

that you can encase them in to stop them from working. If you put them in one of these, for example.

Today: 8:30am, Central Florida

A so called "man" nicknamed "MinnyBean" (aka MinnyQueen) was found buried head first inside a boy nicknamed "kc"'s anal cavity early this morning.

A rescue worked stated "I have never seen anything buried so deep inside an anal cavity before".

Both parties could not be reached for comment, and exactly how Minnybean got inside the cavity is still a mystery.

Both parties also required medical attention. Both recieved a bottle of viagra and were sent home. KC had 20 stitches to close the hole.

Photo: KC

Michael Meyers
Global News Daily (satire at its best).
-
-
-
-
-
-
Disclaimer: if you believe this, then you are crazy.

... but this is not.

Please take note and RTFA.

Today: 8:30am, Central Florida

A so called "man" nicknamed "MinnyBean" (aka MinnyQueen) was found buried head first inside a boy nicknamed "kc"'s anal cavity early this morning.

A rescue worked stated "I have never seen anything buried so deep inside an anal cavity before".

Both parties could not be reached for comment, and exactly how Minnybean got inside the cavity is still a mystery.

Both parties also required medical attention. Both recieved a bottle of viagra and were sent home. KC had 20 stitches to close the hole.

Photo: KC

Don King
Global News Daily (satire at its best).

Disclaimer: if you believe this, then you are crazy.

I'm sure this will be controversial, but trolls need love too. In fact, trolls probably need more love than your average slashbot - slashbots get positive reinforcement, after all.

There. I've stated the painful truth: trolls need love. Now let me tell you why.

Most of us were abused as children, or are being abused now, or have suffered mightily in some way. We have self esteem problems, we don't have confidence, we don't feel loved. We want positive attention and all the things "normal" people have, but we feel like we are unworthy of it.

An old saying rings true here: "If the only potato chip a hungry child can have is a soggy potato chip, there is nothing more important to that child than the soggy potato chip." Well, that describes us trolls perfectly. We are hungry for attention and all we know is that we do not warrant positive attention, so we type "fristus postus" and post goatse links and shoot for the negative potato chip of a (-1 Troll), or a (-1 Flamebait). Off-yopic and redundant mods are like half a soggy potato chip - just enough to whet the appetite for more.

So do the world a favor. end the cycle of abuse. Mod one troll - just one - up, and you will be rewarded for life because you gave a hungry child a dry potato chip. Share the love, won't you?

Did you say goatee?

Go ALL THE WAY, until you see the light at the end of the tunnel.

you might find some of these reports interesting

Los Binds Laborotories

Smegma University of Canada

Goa Tse Governmental Computing Center of Xia, China

Embedded in this image data, you will find the source code of de-CSS. Look closely.

make sure to get him one of these

Is this a POST or a SPOKE?!!!

Fuck! I just wrote a fantastic comment and there was an error in the browser. Now I will just post this goatse.cx

this slashdot geek necessity is low tech, but it's got a beat and you can dance to it.

Do you want to know more?

That link isn't educational.

Posted by CowboyNeal on Friday October 03, @03:08AM
from the closer-looks dept.
john82 writes "In an interesting and insightful article, NetworkWorld Fusion discusses how lawyers for SBC and Verizon are fighting the RIAA's attempts to monitor their customers. As we've heard before, RIAA wants the telcos to report when users download any copyrighted material. Lawyers for SBC and Verizon are fighting back. They also claim that the RIAA is trying to grant themselves powers that are outside of even the Patriot Act. Now where have heard that before? NWFusion also points out that RIAAs handwaving, threats, tantrums have less to do with protecting the rights of musicians, than with protecting the revenue stream created by an out-of-date distribution system." In other RIAA news, taped2thedesk writes "According to the Washington Post and Ars Technica, the RIAA will now contact P2P users before suing them." The RIAA's not so bad, they'll settle out of court over the phone, if you don't mind paying up instead of getting a lawyer.

Posted by CowboyNeal on Friday October 03, @03:08AM
from the closer-looks dept.
john82 writes "In an interesting and insightful article, NetworkWorld Fusion discusses how lawyers for SBC and Verizon are fighting the RIAA's attempts to monitor their customers. As we've heard before, RIAA wants the telcos to report when users download any copyrighted material. Lawyers for SBC and Verizon are fighting back. They also claim that the RIAA is trying to grant themselves powers that are outside of even the Patriot Act. Now where have heard that before? NWFusion also points out that RIAAs handwaving, threats, tantrums have less to do with protecting the rights of musicians, than with protecting the revenue stream created by an out-of-date distribution system." In other RIAA news, taped2thedesk writes "According to the Washington Post and Ars Technica, the RIAA will now contact P2P users before suing them." The RIAA's not so bad, they'll settle out of court over the phone, if you don't mind paying up instead of getting a lawyer.

Posted by CowboyNeal on Friday October 03, @03:08AM
from the closer-looks dept.
john82 writes "In an interesting and insightful article, NetworkWorld Fusion discusses how lawyers for SBC and Verizon are fighting the RIAA's attempts to monitor their customers. As we've heard before, RIAA wants the telcos to report when users download any copyrighted material. Lawyers for SBC and Verizon are fighting back. They also claim that the RIAA is trying to grant themselves powers that are outside of even the Patriot Act. Now where have heard that before? NWFusion also points out that RIAAs handwaving, threats, tantrums have less to do with protecting the rights of musicians, than with protecting the revenue stream created by an out-of-date distribution system." In other RIAA news, taped2thedesk writes "According to the Washington Post and Ars Technica, the RIAA will now contact P2P users before suing them." The RIAA's not so bad, they'll settle out of court over the phone, if you don't mind paying up instead of getting a lawyer.

Posted by CowboyNeal on Friday October 03, @03:08AM
from the closer-looks dept.
john82 writes "In an interesting and insightful article, NetworkWorld Fusion discusses how lawyers for SBC and Verizon are fighting the RIAA's attempts to monitor their customers. As we've heard before, RIAA wants the telcos to report when users download any copyrighted material. Lawyers for SBC and Verizon are fighting back. They also claim that the RIAA is trying to grant themselves powers that are outside of even the Patriot Act. Now where have heard that before? NWFusion also points out that RIAAs handwaving, threats, tantrums have less to do with protecting the rights of musicians, than with protecting the revenue stream created by an out-of-date distribution system." In other RIAA news, taped2thedesk writes "According to the Washington Post and Ars Technica, the RIAA will now contact P2P users before suing them." The RIAA's not so bad, they'll settle out of court over the phone, if you don't mind paying up instead of getting a lawyer.

Posted by CowboyNeal on Friday October 03, @03:08AM
from the closer-looks dept.
john82 writes "In an interesting and insightful article, NetworkWorld Fusion discusses how lawyers for SBC and Verizon are fighting the RIAA's attempts to monitor their customers. As we've heard before, RIAA wants the telcos to report when users download any copyrighted material. Lawyers for SBC and Verizon are fighting back. They also claim that the RIAA is trying to grant themselves powers that are outside of even the Patriot Act. Now where have heard that before? NWFusion also points out that RIAAs handwaving, threats, tantrums have less to do with protecting the rights of musicians, than with protecting the revenue stream created by an out-of-date distribution system." In other RIAA news, taped2thedesk writes "According to the Washington Post and Ars Technica, the RIAA will now contact P2P users before suing them." The RIAA's not so bad, they'll settle out of court over the phone, if you don't mind paying up instead of getting a lawyer.

Posted by CowboyNeal on Friday October 03, @03:08AM
from the closer-looks dept.
john82 writes "In an interesting and insightful article, NetworkWorld Fusion discusses how lawyers for SBC and Verizon are fighting the RIAA's attempts to monitor their customers. As we've heard before, RIAA wants the telcos to report when users download any copyrighted material. Lawyers for SBC and Verizon are fighting back. They also claim that the RIAA is trying to grant themselves powers that are outside of even the Patriot Act. Now where have heard that before? NWFusion also points out that RIAAs handwaving, threats, tantrums have less to do with protecting the rights of musicians, than with protecting the revenue stream created by an out-of-date distribution system." In other RIAA news, taped2thedesk writes "According to the Washington Post and Ars Technica, the RIAA will now contact P2P users before suing them." The RIAA's not so bad, they'll settle out of court over the phone, if you don't mind paying up instead of getting a lawyer.

Posted by CowboyNeal on Friday October 03, @03:08AM
from the closer-looks dept.
john82 writes "In an interesting and insightful article, NetworkWorld Fusion discusses how lawyers for SBC and Verizon are fighting the RIAA's attempts to monitor their customers. As we've heard before, RIAA wants the telcos to report when users download any copyrighted material. Lawyers for SBC and Verizon are fighting back. They also claim that the RIAA is trying to grant themselves powers that are outside of even the Patriot Act. Now where have heard that before? NWFusion also points out that RIAAs handwaving, threats, tantrums have less to do with protecting the rights of musicians, than with protecting the revenue stream created by an out-of-date distribution system." In other RIAA news, taped2thedesk writes "According to the Washington Post and Ars Technica, the RIAA will now contact P2P users before suing them." The RIAA's not so bad, they'll settle out of court over the phone, if you don't mind paying up instead of getting a lawyer.

Better yet, click here!

Assuming you're on the Windows platform, I would suggest you check out FLStudio - it comes with some decent software synths (FLS calls them "generators") and also host many free virtual instruments ("vsti" and "dxi"), as well as shareware and commercial ones.

There are other choices as well - Orion (PC), Muzys (PC & Mac), Cubasis VST (PC & Mac) Tracktion (PC, Mac in beta), Massiva (PC), and Cakewalk Home Studio 2004 (PC) for example. A bit higher up the chain, you have Cubase SE (PC & Mac), and Sonar Studio (PC), Logic Audio big box (Mac) or the self-contained Reason (PC & Mac).

If you want to go beyond synth presets, soundfonts and GM sounds, then you'll probably want to understand analog (subtractive) synthesis - see Analog Synthesis for Beginners for an introduction.

The "definitive site" for this is KvR-VST. Go there and read a bit, then sign up to ask questions. It's a friendly crowd. Just don't go here, that guy isn't very helpful.

Doug

That's not a goatse.cx link. This is a goatse.cx link.

you might find some of these reports interesting

Los Binds Laborotories

Smegma University of Canada

Goa Tse Governmental Computing Center of Xia, China

kthx!

(I can see the spoke from here! (Guess where the "Halo" iz!))

you might find some of these reports interesting

Los Binds Laborotories

Smegma University of Canada

Goa Tse Governmental Computing Center of Xia, China

you might find some of these reports interesting

Los Binds Laborotories

Smegma University of Canada

Goa Tse Governmental Computing Center of Xia, China

ps : first GOAT!

Pekka from Finland is naturally gifted with a champion schlong and heavy balls. As you'll see from his pics, this dude pumps for length! At home, at work, in his car, Pekka's always pumped and ready for action.

My homepage!

^^ Under 50 characters. Enjoy!

The RIAA Giver

I don't know about the front end, but you can get a picture of the back-end here

Wiping your backside - a howto with easy to follow diagrams.

OK, how many of you thought of this site when he said that?

i'd rather eat maggots out of goatse's ass then use their shit products

Then they'll forget all about it by tomorrow, and next week will be proud that LinkSys proves open source is better than a proprietary OS.

Hey, goatse.cx is a cool site, is it really your homepage?

Are you the man on the pictures, how did you open your ass up that much?

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Oh, just click it already.

Reason^H^H^H^H^H^H^H^H^H^H[slashdot.org].

Interesting, eh?

1. Post a goatse link
2. ???
3. Profit!

(In this case, profit = 1, Offtopic)

Love Me

Hello folks,

You may know me from my website: goatse.cx.
Yeah that's good ol' me right there on the front page. I checked my server
logs last week and observed a lot of traffic to and from /. I think I am a
popular and much liked person around here. Thank you!

Okay now to the main reason I posted this comment. It may be slightly OT,
but I don't know what else to do. The /. editors rejected my submission to
Ask Slashdot. Ofcourse, I could've suggested a poll option, but I doubt
that would've made it past them either. So here is what I would like to
ask, in a nutshell.

I have been thinking of starting a subscription based service to my
website. You know the rising cost of living nowadays, not to mention my
ever increasing bandwidth bills (I'm getting famous!). I have also been
asked to add flash/animated versions of my popular pictures. I intend to
read up on some Web page development stuff, or if the cashflow works out,
even hire a programmer -- my small contribution to the US and world
economy!

But to achieve all this, I would need to gather some statistics. How many
of you would be interested in subscribing to my website for, say,
$10/month? It's a rough figure, but the details can be worked out later.
For now, I need to know the general response from you guys -- to see if
the idea is feasible. It would help if the votes are lined up neatly in
this thread. Thanks!

And lastly, any ideas/suggestions/feedback about my website is welcome!

Thanks again people, looking forward to hearing from you, and keep
visiting!

GX

Posted from the nero-online.org Troll Library

Following my work researching The Linux Gay Conspiracy, I am saddened to announced that I have discovered yet another orgy of perverted heterophobic values. My claim lies with the Slashdot mangement.

First, what kind of name is Slashdot? This is obviously a code word in the homosexual community for something perverted.
Slashdot is an anagram of LAD SHOTS, which refers to Slashdot's pedophile agenda and T ASS HOLD, which refers to some gay sexual posistion that Michael and CmdrTaco enjoy.

The 'editors' of Slashdot, as they call themselves, are homosexual swingers with cleverly disguised nicknames.

CmdrTaco (aka "Rob" Malda) is the "head" honcho of Slashdot. Cmdr obviously refers to his desire to dominate over his gay partners, and Taco is obviously a sly reference to his colon. Update: It is well known that Taco claims to be married to Kate Fent. No one really believes that 'she' is actually his wife. We have proof that this 'she' is actually a he. It turns out that Kathleen Fent is an anagram of KHAN FELT EN ET. So this Kate of his is really Khan who "felt in it". I will not describe what that means as I am sure you can imagine yourself.Update From AC: Kate Fent = FAT TEEN, K.

Michael Sims, who goes as 'michael' on Slashdot, is a well known thug and advancer of homosexual agenda. His name is an anagram of ASS CHIME MIL which obviously refers to his desire to flaunt his lower organ.Update: It turns out that Michael Sims is also an anagram of ASS LICE, HMM, I?. That is so sick that words cannot describe the horror.

Father Randy "Pudge" O'Day is Slashdot's Mac propagandist. Macintosh computers are well known as the Gay computer due to their homosexual colors and stylings. An email exchange between 'Pudge' and Apple HQ have been leaked by a former Apple employee who converted to heterosexuality. These two emails (here and here) have been repeatedly posted on Slashdot, but are quickly censored by Slashdot moderators who do not want the public to know about its agenda.Update form Subject Line Troll - it appears the O'Day is just a few letter changes away from I'm Gay and rhymes with O'Day. Is anyone surprised that Mr. Pudge is a fudge packing Mac hippie?

Simoniker, a recent addition to Slashdot has been uncovered as Mr. Goatse himself. Simoniker is a frequent poster to the Games section of Slashdot, obviously because he enjoies modded versions of Quake 3 and UT2K3 as a homosexual warrior who likes to 'overcome' his opponents with his exagerated sized love member. In addition, Simoniker is an anagram of KEN I RIM SO (Ken is probably his current boyfriend) and MEN I IRK SO (which refers to his frustratingly troubled gay relationships, probably due to his rather large asshole).Update from AC: I'M ON ERIK'S... "Eriks what? We can only imagine" -AC.

CowboyNeal. How could I forget him? CowboyNeal is Slashdot's Poll Editor. His rampant homosexuality is obvious. "Cowboy Kneel" is what his name actually means. His odd sexuality needs no further explanation.

Please reply with additional information, contributions, and corrections. I will include any additional information and credit you with it in my further releases of this report.