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FYI, you may want to watch the related Simpsons episode to the dilemma you encountered. Namely this one. Sorry, I got a bit of chuckle out of reading your post, since that's what it reminded me of. :)

I would like to thank those that modded this 'Funny' and 'Insightful', as this is where I was going with this. Thank you for being so astute.

Please, understand that I work Apple and I buy Apple, but I don't live Apple -I take every opportunity to enjoy some 'schadenfreude' by bringing some reality to colleagues and friends that piss themselves in anticipation every time Apple makes a press release. I have been through all of the "ZOMG Apple is going OOB, like, TODAY!", rumors that I don't pay any attention to that tripe anymore and I also don't agree with many of the decisions that Apple has made when it comes to products, software, marketing, or company direction over the years. Every chance that I get to voice my opinion to my Apple sales and engineering contacts, I take full advantage of.

However, Apple has recently fallen into a GOLDMINE because of the 'incompetent boobery' of Ballmer and his crew, and while Apple has made gains, they have failed to truly capitalize on this opportunity because of the failing of one person, ST_VE, to see Apple as more than a 'retail consumer' technology company. Many of the people who hold those top positions at Apple are just as 'detail oriented' as ST_VE is and anyone of them could, with a little help from 'The Master', generate their own personal 'RDF' and reign in all those egos to drive Apple to further success.

That being said, I wouldn't miss Jobs if he were to retire sooner than later, I understand his motivation. To be distracted by one's own mortality would most certainly compromise any person's commitment to anything. So, there are no guarantees that even Jobs, with his acquired skills (RDF), will be able to guide Apple through the tough economic times ahead given his health issue. But, from a strictly technical financial standpoint, the company is strong -huge cash loaf, no debt, ridiculous profit margins, and no burn rate- that they will weather the near term and make gains that, in the future, will make most 'fanboise' happy because Apple has capable, hand-picked, people who are being groomed to 'step in' to assume the mantle of power at Apple.

Anyone get a flashback to the "Itchy and Scratchy Land" episode of The Simpsons:

[Homer and family are at at Itchy and Scratchy Land gate buying tickets.]

Homer: One adult and four children.

Woman: Would you like to buy some Itchy and Scratchy Money?

Homer: What's that?

Woman: Well it's money that's made just for the park. It works just like regular money, but it's, er..."fun".

Bart: Do it, Dad.

Homer: Well, OK, if it's fun...let's see, uh...I'll take $1100 worth.

[Homer walks in and sees all the signs: "No I&S Money", "We Don't Take Itchy and Scratchy Money", etc.]

Homer: Aw!

Now, a sense of humor, that would be something worth wishing for, so would a conscience, but not a soul.

But with a soul, you get a sense of humor for free.

I mean, all you'd have to do is go to international waters and you could do all you wanted, to any country you wanted, to any server you wanted, and there would be no retribution.

Pirates in international waters? You gotta be kidding...

It's as if Matt Groening saw into the future...
http://snpp.com/episodes/BABF08.html

Is it bad when I see comments like this I wonder how hard it would be to generate them with a script?

You could search www.snpp.com with keywords from posts perhaps? Problem is it would need to know that grease is a synonym for oil in this case to find this page -

http://www.snpp.com/episodes/5F20

But I think it should worry you that it's only that step which means you pass a Turing test.

So what I'm saying is that rampant nerd rage is a good thing because people get stuff off their chest

From Lisa the Beauty Queen:

"Before I sing the national anthem, I'd like to say that college football diverts funds that are badly-needed for education and the arts!" Thus inspired, a quartet of nerds charge the field. The headline the next day read, 'Nerds pummelled in football melee'.

I keep reading disagree mail hoping for something worth reading and instead I waste N minutes of life I'll never get back. Then, next time, I do it again...

http://www.snpp.com/episodes/9F14.html

A cupcake is connected to the mild electrical
current. There's even a sign that says, "Do not touch." Bart
sees the cupcake. Bart sees the sign. He tosses it aside and goes
for the cupcake. He gets shocked. Imitating Moe (not the bartender)
"Wiseguy, eh?". He tries again, and slaps himself like Curly. He
tries once more. "Ow." Again. "Ow." Again. "Ow." Lisa once again
takes score. "Hamster 2, Bart 0"

Onion ring.

Whoosh...

Come back Zinc! Come back!

"Thank goodness I still live in a world of telephones, car batteries, handguns and many things made of zinc."

From http://www.snpp.com/episodes/BABF03

-----

The Simpsons make a shopping excursion to ShÃp, the place to go for modern Swedish furniture and accessories. A green end table catches Marge's eye, and she's impressed that those crazy Swedish furniture designers could invent such a far-out concept. Homer tests a bean-bag chair -- and it immediately swallows him up. He joins Captain McAllister, who fell victim to the same chair.

Luckily, Homer rejoins his family in time to look at assemble-it-yourself wall units. A costumed character that looks like an Allen wrench with arms and legs walks up.

Allen: You put it together yourself. All you need is me -- Allen
        Wrench.
Homer: [giggles] He's named after what he is.
Bart: [knocking on the wrench] Cool costume.
Allen: [turns away from the rest of the family to face Bart, and
        begins talking in a robotic tone]
        It's not a costume. They found me inside a meteor.
Marge: Excuse me, where are your hamper lids?
Allen: [friendly] Hamper lids? Uh, third floor.
        [turns to Bart again]
        [robotic] Help, I need tungsten to live. [raises arms]
        Tungsten!
        [Bart flees]
-- "Eight Misbehavin'"

Um, it was their first day.

Homer: Marge, you can stand there finding faults or you can knit me some seatbelts.

I guess the Simpson's isn't popular anymore...

taken from http://www.snpp.com/episodes/1F13.html

Kent Brockman: Ladies and gentlemen, er, we've just lost the picture, but, uh, what we've seen speaks for itself. The Corvair spacecraft has been taken over -- "conquered", if you will -- by a master race of giant space ants. It's difficult to tell from this vantage point whether they will consume the captive earth men or merely enslave them. One thing is for certain, there is no stopping them; the ants will soon be here. And I, for one, welcome our new insect overlords. I'd like to remind them that as a trusted TV personality, I can be helpful in rounding up others to toil in their underground sugar caves.

More likely Homer, whom Dilbert is ripping off.

Homer: "Oh, people can come up with statistics to prove anything. 14% of people know that."

http://www.snpp.com/episodes/1F09.html

American official: The Soviet Union? I thought you guys broke up.

Russian official: Yes, that's what we wanted you to think! [laughs]

Well, it looks as if the century's greatest lie has been exposed, as communist factories start producing tanks again, the Berlin Wall re-erects itself out of the ground, and Lenin rises from the grave, saying "Must Crush Capitalism, Rrr!".

That's slander sir, and we have it on tape.

You'd still want to get rust-proofing. These Colecos'll rust up on ya' like =that=

I can't help but be reminded of this simpsons episode:

From http://www.snpp.com/episodes/BABF01

% The Simpsons happen upon Krusty, who is having a Y2K crisis of his
% own. His pacemaker is stuck in the "hummingbird" mode. Krusty
% lifts himself in the air briefly by flapping his arms, before
% collapsing on the ground.

See also:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Treehouse_of_Horror_X#Life.27s_a_Glitch.2C_Then_You_Die

-theGreater.

Sounds familiar ;)

Meanwhile, at Disco Stu's "Can't Stop the Learnin' Disco Academies"...

Disco Stu: [making indescribable body motions] Did you know that disco record sales were up 400[%] for the year ending 1976? If these trends continue... A-y-y-y!

You mean like Comet Simpson 1995 C1?

- C. Montgomery Burns, [2F16]

Bart: How would I go about creating a half-man, half-monkey-type creature?
Ms.K: I'm sorry, that would be playing God.
Bart: God shmod! I want my monkey-man!

http://www.snpp.com/episodes/8F22.html

Homer: Not a bear in sight. The Bear Patrol must be working like a charm.
Lisa: That's spacious reasoning, Dad.
Homer: Thank you, dear.
Lisa: By your logic I could claim that this rock keeps tigers away.
Homer: Oh, how does it work?
Lisa: It doesn't work.
Homer: Uh-huh.
Lisa: It's just a stupid rock.
Homer: Uh-huh.
Lisa: But I don't see any tigers around, do you?
[Homer thinks of this, then pulls out some money]
Homer: Lisa, I want to buy your rock.
[Lisa refuses at first, then takes the exchange]

source

-uso.

Bah... I can't take the article seriously when they don't mention The Simpsons' Focusyn: Summary and details.

So you don't classify this a character development?

The first time each separate character thought that, perhaps. When I noticed that separate characters did and thought the same things, I appreciated the irony. When it happened multiple times per book in multiple books, I decided that it was as much characterization as the catchphrases of Steve Urkel, and that I had better things to do with my time than to read another several hundred pages while wondering When are they going to get to the fireworks factory? .

I hope you don't mind me summarizing the issue with two words from popular culture:

    Flaming Meaux

Well at least they have relevant experience for the task. I wonder if any of the crew served on that mission a few years back, studying the effects of weightlessness on tiny screws.

It doesn't hurt the atmostphere becase, like it or not, swearing is pervasive in today's society. It's just background that most people don't even notice.

You're example of someone feeling bad because they heard someone swear ("Oh my freakin' ears!" as Todd Flanders said) is completely meaningless, because that's a personal problem of "Todd Flanders." If he's that emotionally fragile he should stay home, since: 1) The comments aren't directed at him; 2) Why should he even care in the first place if someone swears? He should grow up and ignore it like the rest of society. Build up some psychological calluses and move on.

And about the "professional" comment: (I also suspect that you at least agree with whoever tagged the article "unprofessional") I always think of this quote from JWZ regarding swearing and Netscape's Really Bad Attitude mailing list:

"If anyone ever refers to you or anyone you work with as 'professional', then the coolness has left the building."

This is a reference to an old simpsons episode, "Homer the great"
http://www.snpp.com/episodes/2F09.html

I thought that sleep was where Ralph is a Viking....

Where's Marge when you need her. http://www.snpp.com/episodes/9F10.html

Lyle Lanley: Well, sir, there's nothing on earth
                            Like a genuine,
                    Bona fide,
                    Electrified,
                    Six-car
                            Monorail! ...
                            What'd I say?
Ned Flanders: Monorail!
Lyle Lanley: What's it called?
Patty+Selma: Monorail!
Lyle Lanley: That's right! Monorail!
                    [crowd chants `Monorail' softly and rhythmically]
Miss Hoover: I hear those things are awfully loud...
Lyle Lanley: It glides as softly as a cloud.
Apu: Is there a chance the track could bend?
Lyle Lanley: Not on your life, my Hindu friend.
Barney: What about us brain-dead slobs?
Lyle Lanley: You'll all be given cushy jobs.
Abe: Were you sent here by the devil?
Lyle Lanley: No, good sir, I'm on the level.
Wiggum: The ring came off my pudding can.
Lyle Lanley: Take my pen knife, my good man.
                            I swear it's Springfield's only choice...
                            Throw up your hands and raise your voice!
All: [singing] Monorail!
Lyle Lanley: What's it called?
All: Monorail!
Lyle Lanley: Once again...
All: Monorail!
Marge: But Main Street's still all cracked and broken...
Bart: Sorry, Mom, the mob has spoken!
All: [singing] Monorail!
                            Monorail!
                            Monorail!
                    [big finish]
                            Monorail!
Homer: Mono... D'oh!

That's why Professor Frink's motorcycle flies through the air -- no cars to hit.

-----

Frink tests his new flying motorcycle.

Frink: Hello, son. You want to try the flying motorcycle I just invented?
Bart: No time.
Frink: Okay.

Later, Bart loses his skateboard in the wet cement.

Bart: I could sure use that flying motorcycle now.

Frink flies by.

Frink: You had your chance. Whoa-hai.

-----

See, we have this thing called "The First Law of Thermodynamics."

http://www.snpp.com/episodes/2F12.html

Surfing the web without ads like watching PBS without sending money.

Proof in the form of a Simpsons Transcript.

Andy: Hear ye, hear ye. This session will now come to order. With the
              cooperation of the US Department of State, we have present today
              one Bart Simpson.
                [everyone mutters amongst themselves]
              I believe he has something to say. Bart?
  Bart: [goes to microphone, scratches, clears throat several times]
              I'm sorry. I'm sorry for what I did to your country.
                [everyone applauds]
  Andy: [jovial] Well, you're free to go, Bart...right after your
              additional punishment.
Homer: Punishment?
  Andy: Well, a mere apology would be a bit empty, eh? Let the booting
              begin.
Homer: Booting?
  Andy: Aw, it's just a little kick in the bum.
                [a man with a gigantic boot walks in]
  Bart: Y'uh oh.

That joke has too high of a Dennis Miller ratio even for Slashdot.

"Something something, Bruce Ward?"

thats (almost) a simpson's reference, btw - the b-sharps episode, when homer is at the piano coming up with the song 'baby on board'. to marge: "'baby on board, something something, burt ward' -- hey, this thing writes itself!"

Just like this fall's schedule.

The Simpsons did it.

Isn't this how Homer's brother got to be rich again?

http://www.snpp.com/episodes/8F23.html

By the way the headline is phrased I thought they'd invented a program which can understand baby talk. That would be awesome! Although, it's already been done on The Simpsons.

ZIRCONIA ZTOLEN! http://www.snpp.com/episodes/1F09.html