Slashdot Mirror

Nor did I. I never watch TV in fact.

Thanks for letting us know.

whenever the subject matter of tv comes up, i can count on someone in the comments smug enough to loudly announce that he doesn't watch or own a television. who do i get to ridicule now?

where oh where is my favorite smug stereotype?

I'm sure this will be needed at some point, so let's get it out of the way now:

Area Man Constantly Mentioning He Doesn't Own A Television

If you read the Drupal theme developer's guide you'd know that basic Drupal theming works exactly that way. A page template is simply an HTML page with tags inserted where you want specific components to appear.

The power of Drupal's approach to theming is that you can do as little, or as much, customization of detailed component formatting as you want.

It's a site development platform, not simple blogware that lets you play with look and feel. This is why the Onion, HamptonRoads.com, New York Observer and Ozzy Osborne's website can all run Drupal but not look or act like my weblog or JumpTV.

Though I'm still voting Republican (democrat leftist politics bother me greatly)

Given the fact that the Democratic Party is a conservative party, it looks like you're another winger who needs to take a nice, long vacation to North Korea to see what "leftist" actually looks like.

Imagine Reagan if he were thirty years younger

Reagan is like Jesus: republics praise them all the time, but if they were alive and running for office they'd be torn to pieces in today's republic party. Republic pundits are trying to run McCain out of town largely because he supported amnesty, when the Gipper actually did it in the 80's.

Hillary downright scares me - the FIRST dem candidate I am genuinely afraid of, particularly with a dem majority in Congress.

Yes, conservative rationality quickly goes out the window when a Clinton is involved. Hillary was a Goldwater Girl and sat on the board of Wal-Mart for six years. And her husband pushed NAFTA, deregulation, a balanced budget, and was big on law enforcement. There should have been Clinton Republics the way there were Reagan Democrats in the 80's, but the republics engaged in a witch hunt instead.

general supply-side economic theory

AKA the "give the rich more money" policy. But hey, you too might luck out and get ten bucks in 25 years.

proactive national defense (I think Iraq was good idea, with poor execution)

Your "proactive defense" has gotten more Americans killed than Osama bin Laddin. Along with Israel getting a blank check to fuck over the Palestinians, a "proactive defense" is what gave rise to extremist Muslims in the first place.

The United States is surrounded by two friendly, peaceful nations and the world's largest oceans. We don't need a large defense budget, much less outspend the rest of the world combined.

Is this you?

Well, religion is important in American politics because bullshit is one of the main things people are looking at. We can't be distracted with the real issues when there's petty bullshit to focus on.

Ars Technica is reporting that while most people wouldn't know we have a national broadband policy in place, the president claims that not only do we have a plan, it's working spectacularly well.

Not many know of Bush's hidden technical talent. For example, he recently found errors in Fermilab's calculations. Don't underestimate the man.

Microsoft is smart. They did not get where they are by being idiots.

Yes, and the same can be accurately said for Dick Cheney.

It's not about the intelligence stat. It's about the alignment stat.

They are feeding nanotubes to mice to measure toxicity. There's another possible explanation.

There was the editor of a parody magazine (The Pakistani version of The Onion) who was locked up at GitMo as a "terrorist" (His jokes weren't even very good). Check out the Habeus Schmabeus program from This American Life for more interesting examples.

Well, it used to be in their archives. Does anyone have a copy? Just a sec I have to answer the door, someone's pounding on it with the but of an AR-15.

Mitt Romney runs attack ad about self

Well, for example, OOXML doesn't seem to be quite obliterating ODF the way IE did Netscape in the mid-90's.
While not exactly T. Herman Zweibel holding forth from the depths of his iron lung, Mr. Softy seems no' so spry these days.

At least The Onion gets things right sometimes... http://www.theonion.com/content/node/33930

Now bow to your Redmond overlord, miscreants!

http://www.theonion.com/content/node/28694 :p

Or is gravity an article of faith too, because you never know, one day something might fall upwards?!

Nothing will ever fall upwards, because the theory of intelligent falling explains how God ensures that unsupported objects will go downward.

If I were to intentionally replace my legs with superior artificial constructs, with the specific intention of being a superior athletic competitor as such, I think everybody would be screaming and crying that I shouldn't be allowed to compete.

http://www.theonion.com/content/news_briefs/olympic_runners_feeling ____

I bet that if he would have been allowed to compete some athletes would have been tempted to have certain parts of their bodies amputated and replace with more efficient artificial parts.

The Onion is already got this: "Olympic Runners Feeling Stupid For Cutting Off Legs Before Finding Out About Prosthetic Ban" http://www.theonion.com/content/news_briefs/olympic_runners_feeling

If Scrabulous is forced offline, what the hell am I going to do all day when I'm at work?

Possible solution.

Oh, my! I read the original cached article and it read exactly like something from The Onion. Even the quotes seemed like the fake quotes even if they were real quotes taken out of context.

Microsoft patents ones and zeros

Sadly, real news more and more seems to resemble The Onion these days.

Perhaps even more alarmingly, quite a few of their more outlandish stories have actually come true several years later.

(This being one of the funniest such stories...)

The city of Washington DC was built on a swamp. They drained away all the water but the rats never left. They evolved into lobbyists....

http://www.theonion.com/content/node/31923

Unfortunately for them, Parker Brothers have a Monopoly monopoly...

This a new Apple product. You could probably hold your breath during the wait for Griffin, Belkin, Kensington or somebody to release an external battery pack that connects to the magsafe port and gives you a bunch of additional battery life. Then it'll be about another 15-minutes until there's a Chinese knockoff of that product on ebay.

You'd better hurry and order the laptop and the extra battery soon though, Apple will probably release an even better laptop in a few days.

Seriously though, the Macbook Pro is due for an update anytime now.

The Onion got it right.

I don't know, some people dream a lot... (Flash)

OS X has gone from having a wonky 1/0 implementation to having one of the better software raid systems available.

Oh, I don't know... They still seem to be stuck with Roman numerals.

Then again, since Microsoft patented ones and zeroes, I guess OS X is the best analog computing can offer today.

We don't have a TV at home that is hooked up to an antenna or cable or Directv or whatever is out there.

If we go to lunch and a TV is up, I will find myself distracted by the movement, and I hate extra noise. Just Thursday one of my coworkers and also my manager saw me turn off a plasma screen (that no one was watching) at a Vietnamese Pho place and now they both want three.

You, sir, are a douchebag. Same goes for your coworker and manager.

Try to comprehend this: IT'S NOT YOUR FUCKING TV.

Instead of being polite and asking the proprietor, "Excuse me, would it be possible to turn the TV off?", you impose your will on them and anybody else that comes into that establishment.

Do I like TVs in these places? Usually not. If there is no one around, I'll ask the owner or staff member to turn it off or to let me do it. NEVER has such a request been refused. If I was refused for what appears to be no good reason, I'll remember that for next time and not give them my money.

And the 1906 disaster [in San Francisco] was caused by lack of modern building codes and fire protection as much as anything else.

I disagree. It was caused by an earthquake.

Driverless cars sound nice, but I really want a flying car.

People with all the small screens....where are you from? Are you still college students or just recently graduated? Just curious.

to not be this guy right now.

Scientists theorize what would happen if they touched a cloud

Are you this guy?

http://www.theonion.com/content/node/28694

That's right, Dave spent an entire keynote whining that he wanted Java's goodies so that he could get their cash, and then shit on the one guy who actually could have given it to him. Smooth as butta baby. Smoooth.

This is getting ridiculous, smart people do watch television. Mindless entertainment has a place for everyone. This needless elitism reminds me of an onion article - http://www.theonion.com/content/node/28694

Hey! Didn't I read about you in the news?

Why do HD topics always bring out the people who feel the need to justify their own decision to stick with SD (and sound eerily similar to the no TV camp)? If you don't want to swtich, that's fine, but stop telling those of us who can afford to switch, who do see a significant difference, and who actually enjoy the increased quality, that we're all idiots.

We're talking about people who watch movies, not people like you.

http://www.theonion.com/content/video/proposed_classified_bill_will

Rep. John Haller (R-PA) introduces a bill that will allocate (classified) dollars over the next (classified) years to fight flesh-eating (classified).

That's great. But instead, USians continue to vote Demublican.

For some reason I'm reminded of this article from The Onion:

Stoner Architect Drafts All-Foyer Mansion
http://www.theonion.com/content/node/38734