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Star Wars Phantom Menace 1.1 Editor Speaks
guinnessy writes "Studio 360 interviews the person who carried out Phantom Edit 1.1. You can listen to the interview here if you have Real Audio. It's quite interesting and explains why he hated Jar Jar Binks so much and what he did."
Slashdot is dying. You are all a bunch of fucking dweebs!
Get it in you!
Oh well, back to dowloading pr0n...
Pr0n K1ng
First post!!!
second post dude!
to explain why someone would hate Jar Jar so much? I figured most people over ~12 would understand his feelings completely.
I refuse to install Spyware^WRealPlayer on my system. Is there a transcript available anywhere?
I heard on the news that they're gonna rename the second Lord of the Rings movie because the name "The Two Towers" is too controversial given recent events. Can anyone confirm?
Yeah I could if i Had real audio. Anyone will to write down the conversation and post it some were so those of us who don't have real audio can read it?
Close your web browser, shut down your fucking linux "b0xen" and go outside for once in your life.
I think the fact that a site like slashdot, which caters to you fucking nerds out there, can't even
survive without having to charge you for reading it, says alot about how much you fucks are worth to the rest of the world: ZERO.
This should serve as a wakeup call to all you nerds out there who think that working on your b0xen in your one bedroom apartment, posting useless shit to a useless web site like slashdot and reading about the newest version of OpenBSD that can run on your fucking Dreamcast console is a good way to go through life.
So wake the fuck up and DO something productive, something that makes money. Stop wasting your time talking about open source fucking garbage that will never amount to anything useful.
It's quite interesting and explains why he hated Jar Jar Binks so much
Does that really need explaining?
Ooh, a sarcasm detector. Oh, that's a real useful invention.
Slashdotted already,
who's idea was it to post large media files on
hurrrrr
jerkcity prz
than episode 1?
Not Jar Jar again, but Jon Katz.
I wonder if the movie will have any HOT, GAY POOPSEX?
One large black condommed cock up the ass, Homos! Ribbed for his pleasure!
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0o0 0 0o0/o o o o
o0o0o0o0/_ _ _ _/
0o o0o/o o o o o
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Ascloun MacGregor at your service, since the year 19XX.
While we were sitting on my couch watching an unreleased preview of Episode II. Jar Jar becomes a Jedi in the as of yet unreleased sequel. It gets revealed that Luke is actually the love child of Jango Fett and Mace Windu.
For those still wondering, Ayn's philosophy sucks, and is wholly illogical, but boy was she ever a great fuck.
Oh well, back to dowloading pr0n...
Pr0n K1ng
It's raining outside... my laptop might get all wet.
The Phantom Editor's Website!
[rant]
I believe that I speak for all Star Wars fans... or make that even all humans... when I state that Jar Jar Binks must be destroyed.
Alright, perhaps that was a tad harsh. But what is the value to the character -- he is racially offensive, disrupts all possible dark and intelligent tones to the movie and, lest I forget to mention, quite possibly the most annoying character not portrayed by Pauly Shore or Carrot Top ever witnessed in a movie.
Now, this is just my personal opinion. But Mr. Lucas, with all due respect, what on earth were you smoking?
And one more thing! Didn't they learn their lesson from the Ewoks? Jar Jar = the Ewoks to the nth degree.
[/rant]
Sun goes down and trolls crawl out of their holes
I am waiting the fuckers with my blow-torch
I am the killer of trolls, I show the fuckers no remorse
-Impaled Nazarene
What the hell is "the Phantom Edit 1.1"?
Looking for Gay Guy with Big Balls.
rather have big cock, small balls than small cock, big balls...
The club was heaving and I'd managed to lose all my mates whilst queing at the bar for them. I did about 5 laps of the place, looking high and low for a familiar face, before I found a seat on the upper level, looking down on the dancefloor. I thought it was the perfect position to see someone I knew....and it turned out I was right.
I was looking down carefully when I suddenly saw a familiar face. It wasn't any of my mates though, I wasn't disappointed either. There in the middle of the dancefloor was Peter Andre. There were a few girls around him, but generally not too much fuss was made.....probably due to nobody hearing about him for the last few years. He wore a pair of black jeans and a hugging white T-shirt that showed off his pecs. I'd forgotten just how gorgeous the guy was, and this adonis was dancing seductively, just a few metres below. I sat and watched him all evening, remembering all those pictures I used to jack-off in front of, remembering his music videos, wanting to be that girl in the 'I feel you' video, imagining kissing and licking up that torso of his. My dick was getting hard at the very thought of him. The night passed quickly and I was lost in my dream world, my friends were no longer a concern. And then, as I walked out of the club, I saw Peter again, he said goodbye to a friend and then headed off in my direction.
I followed him, not exactly following him since I was heading the same way, but I walked at his pace, so that I didn't get to close, or too far away. "This is stupid" I thought to myself. "I might as well go up to him, what have I got to lose?" I came up with an excuse and quickened my pace. As I got right up behind him I finally opened my mouth. "Excuse me.....erm I'm really sorry to bother you.....but...errrr....you're not by any chance Peter Andre are you?" There, an ice-breaker I thought.
"Yeah" he chuckled "Yeah I am. Its been a long time since someone's recognised me" he said smiling.
I smiled back. "Errr, I....don't suppose I could have your autograph for my sister, she's a big fan." There, my line to talk to him. A complete lie, but he'd never know!
"Sure, you got any thing to use?"
I pulled out a small bit of paper and handed it to him. "She'll be so happy." I said "this will really make her year!"
"Have you got a pen?" He asked. My euphoric mood turned to disappointment.
"Errrr......no......I......haven't" I said checking my pockets. My face dropped.
He saw my mood change. "Look, I'll tell you what" he said. "I'm staying about five minutes walk from here, if you can delay getting home, I reckon I've got some pictures there I could sign."
"Really? Ah that would be fantastic if you could. Are you sure its not too much trouble?"
"Too much trouble?" he laughed. "Its been months since anyone asked me, I'm just grateful some people still recognise me! Come on, its not far."
At that we set off, chatting about the club and how the evening had gone. We then turned up at an appartment block and I followed him up to the third floor, looking at how his jeans cradled his muscular butt as he went up the stairs ahead of me. He pulled his keys out of his pocket and let us in.
"Make yourself comfortable" he said pointing to a cream couch as he headed past the breakfast bar to the fridge. "Want anything?" he asked.
"No I'm fine thanks. This is a nice place."
"I'm borrowing off a mate. He's away for a few days."
"So anyway, what is it that you've been upto? Its been ages since I've heard about you."
"Yeah, my second album didn't really do too well, so I've just been doing this and that, generally messing around."
"You shouldn'y have stopped taking your top off, you would probably still be huge now!" I smiled to show it as a joke as opposed to an insult.
"Yeah the girls did scream when my shirt came off, boy did they love it!" he chuckled.
"They weren't the only ones!" As I said this, I tried, I really did try, to stop my mouth from moving, or my vocal cord produce sound but as if in a fantasy sequence, I'd said it. I turned bright red and hoped he hadn't heard.
"So, did you like it when I took my top off?" he chuckled.
"That's err......thats not what I errrrr.......I meant to say that you errr, must have errrr, had a lot of errr, well, gay fans." I spluttered.
"Really. So you're not telling me that you like me then?"
"Errrr.....no...I was errr, just err, thinking that errr, in todays errr, modern society, that err, you shouldn't just class society as, errr, boy err, meeting girl, if you errr, see what I mean." I felt myself burning up as I spoke, it was like someone had wacked the central heating up to full blast.
"As long as we've got that sorted then." He walked over to the couch and grabbed my right hand with his left. "so this wouldn't turn you on in any kind of way then?" As he spoke he held my hand to his stomach. The firmness of his sixpack was incredible, my dick began to grow. Thoughts were flashing through my mind now. I mean this guy isn't gay surely. All the interviews I'd read and the number of times I'd seen how he acted pointed to a 100% straight guy. Surely he wasn't entertaining the idea of being with another man. His right hand reached down to my crotch. "Mmmmmmm, he said softly, it seems like you're enjoying it." My dick was stood to attention, as hard as steel. He pulled me to my feet. "Follow me." he said with a grin.
I did as he asked and walked behind him, staring at his butt again as he led me to the bedroom. He led me to the middle of the room, the lights were dimly on. "Is this what you wanted to see?" he asked as he lifted his t-shirt ever so slowly over his head. First, I saw the six-pack, then came the pecs and broad shoulders and then he stood there, muscular arms down by his side and that torso that I'd fantasised about so many times, expose in front of. He wore a gold chain around his neck which bent down and up again as it passed through the crevices defining each muscle on route. He drew me in close and placed a delicate kiss on my lower lip. He moved his mouth round to my left ear and gently nibbled at the lobe. "Is this what you want?" he whispered. "Is this what you've fantasised about?"
"Mmmmmm yes" I moaned soflty, my hans runnig over his strong, muscular back.
"I'm glad. I'm glad I make you happy. I'm glad that I'm making your dreams come true. Now, you're going to do anything I ask, ok?"
"Mmmmmm, anything for you."
"I'm glad about that. You're gonna be my little fuck puppy. You're gonna obey all of your masters commands, otherwise you won't get your treat." He moved away from me and sat on the side of his huge double bed. "Now take your clothes off." I did as he asked and stood there in front of him, my dick erect and aching for relief. Slowly i ran my right hand up and then down the shaft, pulling the skin tight down at my balls. "Mmmmmmm yeah" I groaned.
"Stop now you little fuck boy." Said Peter. "Put your arms bye your side and come here." I walked over to the bed as he stood up. I waled up to him, feeling the heat of his body. He put his right hand round my neck and pulled me in for a deep, sensual kiss. Our tongues inter-twined and I put my arms around his shoulders. His left hand grabbed hold of my butt, needing the flesh. He broke the kiss and whispered to me again. "Undress me fuck boy." The feel of his warm breath against my neck sent shivers down my spine. I looked down to see that he wasn't wearing any shoes, so instead I grabbed the buckle of his belt and undid it. I pulled at his button on his jeans, and then the three buttons that made up the flies. As these buttons came away, I felt his dick, straining to be released from his CK boxers. I reached inside his trousers at the back and pushed them down, allowing the palms of my hands to run along those butt cheeks. They were so firm it was untrue. Peter was holding me close all the time, kissing and nibbling around my ears and neck. I hooked my thumbs under the waistband of his CK's. "Wait." he whispered. "Get on your knees fuck boy, use your teeth."
"Yes sir." I replied.
"Sir." he said with a smirk. "Yeah, you can call me that all the time now." His strong hands pushed my shoulders down and I came to rest staring at he large pouch, straining for release. I bit down on the waistband just above his dick, and slowly pulled down. "At a boy" said Peter. His dick, finally free, started to straighten out to its eight inches. I let the boxers fall from my mouth and gently, licked at the head of his dick. "Ohhh yeahhh" moaned Peter. I couldn't believe it, my first taste of dick and it was Peter Andre's. I was in heaven. "Ohhh yeahhh. Suck me you horny fuck" he moaned. I took the head inbetween my lips and gently rolled the foreskin back. Slowly I took more of the shaft in. I took about 6 inches before withdawing and then got 6 1/2. I took his balls in my mouth and sucked on them, playing with them with my tongue. "Ooooohh Mannnn yeahhhh." He groaned. I went back to his shaft. As I closed my lips around it I felt his hands on the back of my head. This time there was no stopping, he pushed me all the way down his shaft, I almost gagged. He held my head there for a few seconds before releasing it and then ramming his dick down my throat once more. His hips began to thrust into me as he started face fucking me. With one final thrust he forcefully threw his hips forward and held my head tight around his shaft as he came with a roar "AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH YEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH that feels....so....goood" Wave after wave of cum filled my mouth and I managed to swallow every last drop of his tasty juice, before he sat back on the bed hunched over and I collapsed at his feet.
After a few moments, he bent down a picked me up, on to my feet. He kissed me passionatley. I ran my left arm over his strong back, my right grabbed hold of his firm butt carressing the skin. He pushed down onto the my back on the middle of the bed and moved down to the end. He crawled onto the bed and over me, till his face was over mine. He lay on my, kissing me again. He started to gring his hardening dick against mine. My hands cupped his firm arse cheeks. His right hand grabbed hold of miy dick as well as his own, which was fully erect again. His fingers closed around them and he began thrusting. It didn't take long for the excitement to get to me and I came, squirting cum between our torso's. After I stopped bucking, he rolled off me.
"Someone's gonna have to get me clean." he said. I moved over and began licking his chest. Licking all that cum off his chest, down what seemed like huge valleys between his muscles. Down to his six, or should that be eight pack? He gently used his arms to move me next to him, lying on my front, and he rolled on top of me. "And now for the final act." he said.
The index finger of his right hand traced a line over my hole and along my crack. Suddenly his dick entered quickly and forcefully, all eight inches. Slowly, he withdrew before entering with just as much force and speed again. He began kissing my neck and back and slowed his pace. His right arm reached round my somach pulling me up, guiding me onto my knees. He held my back, parallel to the bed. "This seems appropriate doesn't it my little fuck puppy" he said between breaths. He continued fucking my arse and reached around to my hard as steel dick, jerking me off. Then, together we moaned and started to cum together. Peter collapsed next to me and pulled my head onto his chest. There we spent the night fast asleep me in his strong embrace.
Anyone know where the offical Phantom Edited movie is?
--
# Canmephians for a better Linux Kernel
$Stalag99{"URL"}="http://stalag99.net";
which highlights JarJar's zany antics and removes the parts that advance the story. I call it the JarJar Yes-Pleasy-Yessir Phantom Meesa-Likie-Likie Edit.
Probably because you can start listening nearly instantly, vs. waiting for the whole file to download first.
Also, Real has some nice streaming features. They can dynamically change the bitrate of the audio depending on your ability to download it.
I have no doubt that MP3 or OGG could be used to do the same thing, but consider that Real is a big player in this space.
"Derp de derp."
this is a new site for gay linuxboys that has hot chat and hardcore videos that you watch right over the net! meet other gay GNU/Fags on the net, find hot sex sites and watch all the xxx movies that you want!
it's very easy to use and a whole lot of fun....
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We are 138
In the eyes of tiger
Do you think we're robot clean
Does this face look almost mean
Is it time to be an android not a man
The pleasantries are gone
We're stripped of all we were
In the eyes of tiger
We are 138
We are 138, 8, 8, 8
8, 8, 8, 8, 8, 8, 8, 8
Ascloun MacGregor at your service, since the year 19XX.
A new Phantom Edit has just been released this month. True it's not by the same guy that did the original (LA) version, but then again the 2nd (NY) version was done by 2 unrelated people in NY, so I guess it makes sense for the 3rd (DC) version to be made by yet an other unrelated person.
You can find info about it at the phantom edit forum. Also you can download a 2cd VCD of the new version (thanks to Bit Torrent!) from me here.
This FAQ is designed to give tips on trolling on Slashdot, created in celebration of Blackout Week. It is dedicated to all hard-working trolls and crapflooders.
How do I crapflood?
A crapflood is an (intentionally) content-free post. Here are some suggestions for the source of your crapflood -- remember to take care with repetition, odd characters, or repetition, to get past the lameness filter:
How do I widen pages?
A method is known and delivered to us by the beautiful Klerck which currently works in Internet Explorer alone. This will therefore ruin the browsing experience of by far the majority of Slashdot readers. Start with the text:
http://www.eveeieyhfgfcdoosammgwsnboivvbsczxlzgabc /
then repeat /ooieiabdcdjsvbkeldfogjhiyeeejkagclmieooionoepdk /
several times, remembering to avoid the compression filter trap by using different random characters.How do I karma whore?
"Karma whoring" is the practice of gaining moderation points for their own sake. It is particularly useful in techniques for defeating the moderation system. Some tips for karma whoring are:
How do I defeat the moderation system?
The moderation system is far from flawless. Here are some ways to devalue it:
How do I defeat authentication?
Don't. The FBI will arrest you for being a terrorist. Instead, make an authoritative nick like CmdrTaco (editor). The majority of people are easily fooled, and will be likely to take notice of and respond to your post, and even moderate it up. Think of it like Lunix Turvalds walking into the room -- people listen to what he has to say, and don't dare disagree.
How do I defeat the goatse link early warning system?
Simple -- use one of the many foolishly implemented redirector URLs hosted on well-known sites. Here's an innocuous recent example which pretends to link to the highly informative about.com, but in fact links to a site of the popular 90's lesbian band The Spice Girls: Informative link which will get me karma
What are some excellent sites to sneakily link to?
Mostly, you should link to gay porn. If you are reading this FAQ, you already know the URLs, so I don't need to supply them, except to say that it's almost an initiation ceremony in Slashdot trolling to link to goatse.
Administrativa
How do I justify the existence of this FAQ?
Slashdot is full of people who support unlicensed weapons ownership and dissemination of bomb creation documents -- in short, they support freedom, even when that freedom could cause harm. This document should be considered as that very freedom in action. Indeed, to disparage or moderate down this document would be un-American, and the FBI are likely to arrest you for being a terrorist.
How do I add to or change this FAQ?
Simply re-post the FAQ on Slashdot, adding an appropriate question, and incrementing the version number by 1. Before doing so, please try to ensure you have the latest version, and remember to keep this post W3C compliant!
How else can I help with the Troll and Crapflooding Cause?
Moderate this post up, re-post it, put it in your journal, and upload it on your website. Thanks!
Mary likes the taste of my jiz. Well, at least that is what she always tells me...but who am I to believe the bitch, anyway? I can't keep that snatch away from another man's cock if my life depended on it. Indeed, she is the horniest fuck a guy could be lucky enough to have. It's no use getting her to be faithful to me - I'll come home and suck her off, only to find her twot scented with some dude's seed. While I am at work, she finds another hobby to get her off. Dildoes, vibrators, her own hands...well, fuck, it just doesn't do it for her. She usually picks a man as her hobby of choice. A different one every day. And, for the present time (a couple of weeks, maybe?) Mary is mine to plug (while another guy gives it to her on the side.) So, I had better tell you about one particular experience with this gal before she runs off and leaves me with no inspiration.
You wouldn't believe the boner it gives me to think about Mary and the things she does. I picked her up the first time at this local Portland bar I frequent a couple nights a week. I believe it was a Thursday - a typical crowd, and not much going on...well, except for this phenomenal girl sitting alone at the bar a couple of feet away from me. The gorilla in my sans- underwear slacks started to rise as soon as I saw the pouty lips, the dynamite tits, the fucking curves of her ass and thighs, and the legs of a true model - everything this girl had made me want to blow my wad right there. I was pretty much stunned. I figured I was going to need to get some pussy from this she-beast tonight or there would be hell to pay - so I started on over to where she was sitting. I had my Zima in hand, ready to converse...when she whipped her head of beautiful blonde hair my way and stood up. She was a little shorter than me - maybe I was thinking that she would be the perfect height for a sixty-nine. Everything at that moment was just too damn much to comprehend. The unit in my pants was pulsing, my heart was nervous, anxious...and my mind, I just wasn't thinking...
The look she gave me said it all. She wanted to get rammed by my Jimmy. I didn't say a thing, and neither did she. As was typical for my Thursday night flings at O'Doulings, I grabbed the bitch by the hand with force, and led her to the shitter. I know it sounds tasteless - almost like something out of a 70's orgy, but a real fine bitch like this needs to be power-fucked in a low class joint to show her that she ain't so great. The more I looked at her, the more I realized that she was so beautiful - she needed to fall from grace. I was ready to do it.
I turned her around. I didn't want to look at her face anymore. Pretty as hell, she made me want to kiss her wonderful mouth. I wanted to ravage this girl till she couldn't stand it anymore, but I knew that I had to achieve something else with the her first. Surprisingly, this tight body felt very eager to please me. As soon as the stall door closed behind us in the men's restroom, I pushed the pussy over the toilet so that her legs were spread nice and wide over the porcelain.
I said, "O.K. you cunt - You wanna get yer pooper plugged? First, you better put a nice big shit in the toilet for me!"
She replied, breathing heavily, "What the fuck kind of sicko are you, you asshole?"
I yelled into her damn ear, "You'd better do what I say or I'm gonna fuck your brown cave dry! Now plop a big turd or you're gonna get it!"
When she responded, I knew that the first part of the night was going to go as planned.
"Fine!" she said, "You'd better have a fucking huge dick - my twot's been filled by a lot of guys who look bigger than your sorry-ass bulge."
Right then and there, a noisy squirt of diarrhea emerged from her rear-hole and right onto my shoe. I wanted to kick the bitch, but I decided that the aroma of her poo was too good to waste on the disgust of a soiled Hush-Puppy. I pulled up her black skirt and saw that my guess was wrong: she wasn't wearing crotchless panties or none at all - yes, she had filled her own pants with butt-cum! Pretty fuckin' sick sight, but just what I need to put me over the edge. I yanked her dripping brown- stained white panties down and dropped them to her knees. I then ripped my dick out of the Calvin's and shoved it into her wet fudge-tunnel. She screamed, so I had to put my hand over her mouth.
"Hey you fucker! What the fuck do you think you're doing??? My ass is on fire!"
I whispered into her ear, "I know. Do you want it some more?"
I thought I was pretty hot shit until she pulled this fucking sweet karate move right then. I mean, in a split-second, this bitch jumped off my pole and had her hands on my excrement- covered member. I didn't have a chance to even gasp. Before I knew it, my dick was encased in one of those black leather bondage straps. Fuck, she looked up at me with disgust and yelled, "If you want my ass, you have to earn it. You like shit, huh? Now's you're chance to show me how you like my 'cooking'."
She bent me over and instructed me to lick up her wet explosion from a couple of moments ago. I refused, but she whipped the control cord on that fucking black thing on my dick. I realized that if I wanted to walk out of that bathroom a man, I'd have to do what she said. I'd never tasted shit before. Only played with it. I had a girlfriend in high school who fooled everybody. She was a princess on the outside, saludatorian, fucking homecoming queen, little miss perfect. Everyone thought she was so innocent. If they only knew about her - the orgies, rolling in her shit while we fucked, the toys, the other girls, the animals, that ho was something else....but back to Mary. I mean, I guess I liked the smell of shit, the warm feel of a nice hard log as it emerged from a chick's sphincter. That shit always got me off. I couldn't have a decent spank on my dick without thinking of a girl taking a crap. I'd thought about eating it before too, but just never had the guts to do it. It looked like I was going to have to be up to the challenge.
get your anal sex here! (_0_)
2. See the music
I'm boycotting Slashdot right now.
hemos fucks will dunn goats!
Quick, mod me down for off-topic! (I'm just trying to boost the number of users on my personal server) http://www.ozone-o3.net/ Windows and Linux interface to BeShare/MUSCLE Servers, completely free, uses Qt, and has no ads.
I say hi to mom now: "Hi Mom!"
realaudio is nothing more than a netversion (low bandw) of the ac3 codec, its all in the official
ac3 specs.
Thus, it should decompress using ac3 code, (unless real wrapped it in another file format)
Jessica's mother stopped the car and got out. It was a beautiful summer afternoon. Jessica was tired from a long car trip. She was a little sad about leaving her old friends behind. Jessica was from a rich family. Her father owned and ran the family business, but they had to move because her father decided to re-locate the company's headquarters to an area which allowed for more space and privacy. Jessica's mother had heard about a special colony that sounded interesting to her. It was a colony with about twenty homes. All the families had children and all the children were ages twelve and under. None of them were potty trained. Jessica's mother had became friends with Mrs. Pratt who had a girl about Jessica's age. Mrs. Pratt clued her in about how things at the colony were. The parents at the colony did not believe in traditional potty training methods. They believed that a child shouldn't be potty trained until they began puberty. They had many reasons for this which Mrs. Aldag could understand. One major belief was that young children should not have to worry about making it to the bathroom. They conducted studies which proved that most children between the ages of 3 and 12 have frequent accidents because their bladder muscles are not fully developed until they begin puberty. Another belief these parents shared is that having their children in diapers, for whatever reason, made them much more respectful of their elders and made them very well behaved. Of course, all children will misbehave from time to time, but all the children at the colony were angels compared to kids outside of the colony. Mrs. Aldag had hoped this colony would help her daughter. Jessica was very snobby and a big show off. She had a bedwetting problem and had to wear diapers at night. Mrs. Aldag figured switching her to diapers twenty-four seven was worth a try.
After they were all moved in, it became time for bed. Mrs. Aldag helped her daughter get ready for bed. She got out a size six Pampered Princess for Girls diaper and began diapering her. Jessica was a very pretty and petite ten year old. She had shoulder length blonde hair, was about 4'5 and weighed around 65 pounds. Her diapers were mostly white on the outside with pink leak guards and a pink waistband with cute little bears and bunnies on the taping panel. They were thick and the inside padding was very soft, fluffy, and comfortable. Jessica wore only the best diapers that money could buy.
Goodnight sweetie. I think you will really like it here, Mrs. Aldag said. Jessica smiled. I hope so Mommy. This place is kind of weird, Jessica said. Mrs. Aldag tucked the covers over her daughter and left the room.
The next morning, Jessica's diaper was soaked, but it hardly bothered her. She was used to waking up with soaked diapers, and her Pampered Princess diapers did a great job protecting her precious skin. Her mother came in as usual to change her, but this time instead of getting out her panties to wear, she got out another diaper and began diapering her.
Mom? What are you doing? she asked. Mrs. Aldag continued to put the diaper on her daughter.
Sweetie, from now on you will be wearing diapers all day and all night. You won't be potty trained until you get a little older. That's how things are at this colony here. All the other kids wear diapers. I think it will be easier for all of us, Mrs. Aldag explained. Jessica didn't say much. She just said 'well, okay I guess that's cool, and allowed her mother to diaper her. Jessica didn't really mind being in diapers. After all, they were very comfy, and if all the other kids wore diapers, she knew she'd be the only one who wore the most fancy and expensive diapers. It would give her something to brag about.
After breakfast, Jessica decided to go out to the playground and see if there were any other kids around. She saw a few kids playing there. One was a girl who looked to be about six with medium blonde hair and blue eyes. Another was a girl about eleven with light brown hair and green eyes, and the other child was a boy who was about eight with dark brown hair and hazel eyes. She walked over to them.
Hi. Are you new here? the eleven year old girl asked.
Yes, we just moved here yesterday. My name is Jessica. I'm ten. My daddy is rich and owns his own company. We had to move here I guess, she said, in her snobby voice.
Oh, well my name is Katie. I've lived here all my life. I'm eleven. This is Emily, she's six. And this is Josh, my friend. He's eight. You can play with us if you want. We're gonna play tag now, she said.
That's cool, Jessica said sarcastically. She played with them for a little while until they got sick of tag. They decided to go play on the swings. Emily was walking slowly towards the swings when she said ut oh, and stopped a little. She then began giggling.
What's with her? Jessica asked.
Oh nothing, she just wet her diaper, Josh said.
That's too bad. I don't wet my diaper I just wear it. What kind of diapers do you wear? Jessica asked. Emily wore Pampers for Girls. They were similar to Jessica's diapers but not quite as thick and fancy. Katie wore Luvs. They were a plain, unisex diaper with a crinkly plastic cover. They were nowhere near the same level as Jessica's diapers, but they did the job of absorbing wetness just fine. Josh wore blue Huggies for Boys. All the diapers the children wore were size six, and they were all small enough to fit them.
Oh, well I wear Pampered Princess diapers. They are the best diapers and only princesses like me get to wear them, she said in a real snobby voice. Katie just looked at her in envy.
Well pin a rose on your nose, Katie said. Emily frowned. She's mean!
I am not. You're just jealous cause you don't have Pampered Princess diapers! Jessica yelled back.
Am not. I like my diapies. They are nice, Emily said. Of course, the children were all jealous of her and wished they had the Pampered Princess diapers, but they didn't admit it.
Well I'm going back to my house. I'll see you kids later I guess, she said. She strutted back to her house and went into her room to play with her Barbie dolls and other toys.
After a week or so, Jessica was beginning to get used to the colony. She played with the kids occasionally, and they all became jealous of her. She only tolerated Katie, Emily and Josh and was a real brat towards any of the other children. She hardly ever wet her diapers during the day, because then she'd be just like the other kids and she wanted to be superior to them. She usually held it all in and after she was in bed, she'd completely soak her diaper. Jessica decided to go outside by the playground again and see who she could show off to this time. She played with Katie, Emily, and Josh for a while until Katie began wetting her diaper. All the kids that day were outside just wearing their diapers and t-shirts. It was very warm and sometimes their mothers dressed them this way. Jessica looked at Katie's diaper.
My gosh you are soaked Katie. Go get that thing changed! Jessica said, as if having a wet diaper was the worst thing in the world.
Nah its okay, I'm not that wet yet, she said. Jessica just looked at her with this snobbish look on her face. Well, I don't wet my diaper, she said.
Yes you do, said Emily who also had pee soaking through her diaper. I've seen you get changed in the morning so you must wet, she demanded.
Well at least I don't go during the day, Jessica said with her nose high in the air. Emily pouted and went back to playing with the other children.
Oh I gotta go, it's supper time. You kids have fun in your wet diapers,' she said while laughing.
Shut up. You think you're so great, don't you? Katie said.
Yeah because I know I am, Jessica said as she ran away towards her house. The other kids made faces at her. As she was out of sight, they began talking.
Why she such a meany? Emily asked Katie. Katie gave Emily a little hug.
I don't know Emm. Some kids are just like that. She thinks she's all great because her daddy is rich and they have more money than us. Some people who have lots of money like to show off like that, Katie said. Emily just nodded and went back to playing.
The next day, Jessica went back out to play. The other kids played with her and Jessica again talked to them like they were peasants and teased them. She was playing on the monkey bars, after being outside for a few hours when all of a sudden she felt something warm trickling into her diaper. She was peeing her diaper without even knowing it. She couldn't believe she was actually peeing her diaper. She never did this during the day. She couldn't help herself and began enjoying the feeling. Something just came over her that she couldn't control. She felt warm and happy between her legs and a smile came across her face. She began to realize why the other kids never seemed to mind when they wet their diapies. Little Emily always seemed to be proud every time she wet hers. Jessica just sat on top of the monkey bars, smiling and enjoying every minute of her wet, warm diaper. My gosh this is great, she thought to herself. She was a little guilty about it at first but that feeling soon went away. Katie was trying to get her attention but Jessica was so tuned out and in her own little world, she didn't hear anything.
Jessica? Earth to Princess Jessica?? Hello?? Katie said. Jessica still didn't answer so Katie climbed up the monkey bars and shook her a little. Jessica??
Oh...uhyes?
Sorry to interrupt your little daydream about being a rich spoiled princess. But your Mommy came by and said you need to go home for supper soon, Katie said.
Jessica smiled. Uh, Katie? I wasn't dreaming about being a princess. I, um.. I wasI mean.. I am wetting mywetting my diaper! And I love it! She muttered.
Really? You do? I knew someday you'd come to your senses, Katie said. Emily and Josh both giggled and said she's wetting her diaper!!! Katie began wetting her diaper. Guess what? I'm wetting too! She said.
Me too! And a lot, Josh said. Emly giggled and looked down at her diaper.
Ut oh! Me too! Emily said while giggling. Jessica started a chain reaction. All the kids began wetting their diapers and soaked them, but it seemed Jessica was like a water faucet that someone turned on and left it that way. Jessica wet her diaper for several minutes. It was soaking wet, soggy, and mushy. Her smile only got bigger as she felt her warm, saturated diaper and that special feeling between her legs.
Don't you just love it? Jessica asked Katie.
Oh yeah. There's nothing better than the feeling of a nice warm, wet diaper! Katie said. Emily giggled put her hand on the front of her diaper. Ooo I'm really wet, she said giggling. Yeah I think we should all go and get changed now, Katie said.
From that moment on, Jessica forgot all about being a princess. She stopped being so snobby to the children and even gave Katie a little hug.I'm sorry I was so mean to you guys. I promise I won't tease you again, okay? she said. The kids all smiled and told her they forgave her. The kids went in to get changed. Jessica ran back home. She wondered what her mother would think about her wetting her diaper and was kind of shy to ask about getting changed.
Oh, hi sweetie. All ready for supper? Mrs. Aldag asked.
Yeah, but, Mommy? Jessica asked nervously.
Yes? Is something wrong?
No. But uh. I need I need myI need my diaper changed, she said. A big smile came across Mrs. Aldag's face, like she was proud of her daughter for soaking her diaper.
Really? You wet your diaper? That's great, sweetie. You don't have to be worried about it. It's about time you started wetting during the day like the other kids, sweetie. I'll bet you're making some nice friends here, she said. Jessica sighed happily and nodded. Mrs. Aldag took Jessica upstairs and laid her on her bed. She began taking her soaking wet diaper off.
Oh My goodness, Jessica, your diaper is extremely wet! I guess you finally decided to allow yourself a good diaper wetting. It's not good to hold it in all day, her mother said. Jessica just smiled and giggled as her mother continued to change her diaper
Chapter Two: Jessica Begins to Love her Diapers
Jessica woke up to an extremely wet diaper, as usual. She was used to it. Her mom came in to check on her. I'll bet you're soaked, huh? Jessica nodded her head and smiles.
That's my girl. Let's get you in a dry diaper and then we can have breakfast, her mom said. She changed Jessica into a dry Pampered Princess diaper and helped her get dressed, then they had breakfast. Jessica wanted to go out to play with her new friends again.
I'm so glad you've made new friends. I'll bet they're a lot of fun, Mrs. Aldag said. Jessica smiled and nodded. Yup Mommy I like them a lot. I'm glad we came to this place, she said as she gave her mother a hug. Mrs. Aldag smiled and watched as her daughter ran outside to go play. Jessica went back to the playground and instantly found Katie, Josh, Emily, and some other neighborhood kids.
Hi Katie! How long have you guys been out here? Jessica asked.
Not long we just got here, Katie said. Emily was wearing nothing but a diaper and t-shirt. It seemed her mother liked to dress her that way, probably because Emily was still very young and her mom thought it was cute. Emily smiled at Jessica and said hello to her.
Hey there Emily. You keeping dry? she asked, jokingly.
For now I am but I had a lotta juice for breakfast. I'm gonna be soaked later, Emily said while giggling. Jessica, Katie, and Josh all giggled in unison.
Let's play tag, Katie said. They all agreed this would be a good idea and began playing tag. They played tag for about an hour and then decided to go play in the sandbox. Emily was building a little sandcastle as she began to fidget and look down at her diaper. Uh oh I think that juice coming out now, she said happily. The kids all watched as the front of her diaper became yellowand then a darker yellow. Emily finally finished peeing after about a minute. She sighed and smiled. All done! she said, keeping a smile on her face the entire time. Jessica smiled and giggled. Wow Emily, you weren't kidding before. You aren't leaking, are you? Emily shook her head. Her diaper wasn't anywhere close to leaking, but it was quite soggy. Emily went back to playing, along with everyone else. Katie began wetting her diaper, but didn't announce it until she was done. Okay now I'm wet too. Now just Jessica and Josh gotta pee and then we can all be wet together, she said while laughing. Jessica tried to pee but didn't feel anything. I don't think I have to go yet. I guess I didn't drink enough for breakfast, she said. Josh didn't have to go either.
After a while, the kids got sick of the sandbox and decided to play on the swings and monkey bars. They were all swinging when Josh began to slow down, almost coming to a complete stop.
Is something wrong, Josh? Katie asked.
No, not really, just that I have to poop really bad, he said. He began getting red in the face and making grunting noises and began filling his diaper.
Uh oh, Joshie going poopie! Emily said playfully.
Hey, that makes me have to poop too, Katie said. She turned red in the face, grunted, and felt a big BM push into her diaper. She wasn't done yet, though. She felt more coming. Wow Josh look what you started. I gotta go more, she exclaimed. Josh just smiled and Emily giggled and announced she had to go too! Jessica laughed. Wow, this is like a domino effect. But, II don't gotta go. Sorry to ruin the effect, she said. Emily giggled. It..It's okay. You will soon I sure. Uhhhere comes, she said as she began to push out a load into her diaper. Katie continued to push and grunt and more poop went into her diaper. You could tell her diaper was loaded, even though she was wearing shorts. Her behind bulged out and of course, it smelled. Emily sighed as she finished filling her diaper. The three of them all went back to swinging like nothing was wrong.
Weeeee this is fun, Katie said.
Yeah and it even funner doing dis in a poopy diaper, Emily shouted. Jessica laughed and giggled at them, in a playful way. Hehe, we're so silly, she said.
Silly? Nah. We just like going in our diapers, that's all! Katie said. Jessica nodded. Yeah, I guess you're right. The kids played together for another hour. Jessica had soaked her diaper by this time, but was still not poopy. She had to go, but for some reason she was afraid to go in her diaper. Peeing was no problem, and though the other kids seemed to love being in poopy diapers, she just didn't feel at ease enough to poop her diaper at the time. As the kids were playing, Emily's mother came over to the playground.
Emily, sweetie, we have to go shopping now. I'll bet you need a diaper change by now too, right? Emily nodded and smiled, proud of the production she made in her diaper.
Yeah momma, I went poopy and pee pee. A lot mommy! Emily said smugly. Her mother smiled. Aww, that's my good little girl. Let's go get you cleaned up and then off to the store. Say goodbye to your friends, sweetie. Emily said goodbye to the kids and went with her Mom. Jessica decided to play with Katie on the Monkey bars for a while.
I really like you, Katie. I..I mean that. You're a good friend. Can I come over to your house someday maybe? Jessica asked sweetly.
Sure Jessica, that would be cool. We could play with all my toys and stuff. There's lots of neat things to do at my house. Wanna come over tomorrow? Katie asked.
Yeah! That would be great. I'll ask my Mommy. I'm sure she'll say yes. She likes that I'm making friends, Jessica said happily. Katie smiled and nodded. Well, I think I should go get changed now and then I think it's gonna be lunch time. We'll probably be out here later, Katie said.
Cool, I'll be here after lunch then, Jessica said. She began walking back towards her house as Katie shouted her name. Jessica turned around.
Heytry to relax Jessyou'll go poopy but you gotta relax. Don't be afraid, she said. Jessica wondered how Katie knew, but didn't question her. She just smiled and said thanks Katie, I will and walked home. When she got home, her mother changed her soggy diaper. Jessica was really beginning to enjoy wearing these diapers. Changing time was beginning to become more and more enjoyable to her.
There, all dry again, princess. Jessica? I've noticed you haven't gone poopy since you've been put back in diapers. Are you feeling okay? her Mom asked as she taped her new diaper on her.
Yes I'm okay Mommy. I.. I just don't have to poop yet, that's all, Jessica explained.
Well, please try to poop today sweetie. Can you try for me?
Okay Mommy, I'll try, she said. They ate lunch and then watched TV for a while. Jessica went back outside to play for a while. She knew she had poop waiting to come out, but still no matter how hard she tried, nothing happened. Katie tried to get her to relax at the playground and had Jessica try to push it out, but nothing worked.
Later that night, Jessica's mother was changing her into her night diaper and getting her ready for bed. Sweetie, you still haven't gone poopie. I suggest you try to go poopy tonight as you lie in bed, okay honey? she kindly suggested. Jessica nodded and agreed to try. She wanted so much to poop her diaper and make her mommy happy. As she laid in bed that night, she kept thinking to herself I gotta poopy in my diaperI gotta poopy in my diaper. It's gonna happen. I'm going to poop. She kept saying this over and over in her mind until she drifted off to sleep.
The next morning, Jessica woke up about an hour earlier than usual. She awake to a strong sensation. She knew immediately what her body was about to do. She had to poop, and this time, there was no stopping it. She sat up and got on all fours and began to push and grunt. She felt a soft, warm mushy substance begin to fill into her diaper. She continued to push and grunt for about five minutes. Her diaper was completely loaded. It stunk awful, but that didn't bother her. She smiled as she felt her mushy, lumpy diaper. As she sat down in it, she smiled even more, totally enjoying the feeling. She wondered to herself why she was so afraid to poop earlier; this was the greatest thing she had ever felt. She enjoyed her poopy diaper for a few minutes until her mother came in to check on her.
Well, good morning sweetie. Did you sleep good? Ohdo I smell what I think I smell? Your went poopie? Jessica's mom said while smiling.
Yes Mommy, I did. A lot! she said proudly.
Aww, that's great honey. You've done what I asked Good girl, she said while rubbing Jessica's diaper. Okay, lets get you changed and ready for breakfast, she said. She happily changed Jessica's extremely poopy filled diaper. Jessica smiled and giggled during the entire change, enjoying every minute of it.
Chapter Three: Jessica and Katie become close friends
A few weeks passed. Jessica and Katie started to form a very close bond with each other. They discovered they had a lot in common. They both like many of the same musical groups, they both loved their diapers, they both enjoyed roller skating and they liked the same TV shows. Jessica liked the other children too, but she thought of Katie as her best friend and began hanging out with just her. She'd go to Katie's house often, and Katie would go to Jessica's house. Jessica's parents were so pleased that she was adjusting to the area so well and were very proud of her daughter for being such a nice friend and not being the brat she used to be.
One night, Jessica was talking on the phone with Katie. She had called her because she was bored and just wanted to talk. Katie decided to ask Jessica over to a sleepover.
Hey Jesscan I ask you something? Katie asked.
Yeah, anything. What's up?
I just wanted to ask if you wanna come over to my house tonight, for a sleepover, Katie said.
Yeah, that would be great! We'd have lots of fun. I'll ask my mommy, can you hold on? Jessica asked. Katie said sure. Jessica went to ask her mother if she could sleepover.
That sounds like a great idea, sweetie. Sure, you can go. Just be sure to pack plenty of diapers, she said with a grin on her face.
Of course, mommy! Thanks! Jessica said as she happily skipped back to her room.
Hey, I can go! What time should I be there? Jessica asked her friend.
You can come here for dinner, I already asked my parents. So be here at 5:30, Katie said happily.
Cool, I'll be there. See you then. Bye, Jessica said. She hung up the phone and instantly got her suitcase and began packing. She packed her diapers and diapering supplies in her diaper bag. It wasn't a babyish looking diaper bag, but more like a backpack.
Jessi, do you need to be changed before you go? her mother asked. Jessica shook her head. Her diaper was a little wet, but that didn't bother her. She knew she'd get changed when her diaper was full, over at Katie's house. Her mother smiled and hugged and kissed her goodbye and told her to be a good girl. Jessica nodded and left the house. She arrived at Katie's house and rang the bell. Katie answered, wearing just a diaper and t-shirt.
Hi Jess! Come in. If you want, make yourself more comfy. I never wear much clothes here, just my shirt and diaper. It's a lot easier that way for changing time, too, she said with a smile. Jessica instantly took her pants off and put them in her suitcase. She giggled. Okay, I like that idea, she said. Katie looked at her diaper and smiled.
I see you're a little wet, huh? Me too. The two girls just giggled and went up to Katie's room to put her things away. They eat dinner shortly after. Katie's parents were very nice and they were very pleased to be meeting one of Katie's new friends. They kept asking Jessica lots of questions, but she didn't mind answering them. They were just being friendly. Katie's mother reminded Jessica that if she needed to be changed at any time to let either her or Katie's dad know, and they'd be happy to change her. After supper, Jessica and Katie went back up to her room to talk.
So, what you wanna do first? We can watch TV, or play a game, or play video games, or play with dolls, whatever you want. You're my guest tonight, Katie said. Jessica smiled. Let's play a game. Do you like Monopoly Junior? Jessica asked.
Yeah, I love that game. I'd love to, Katie said. The two girls played the game. It took about an hour to finish. Katie won. Good game, it was very close, Katie said. Jessica nodded. They decided to go see what was on TV and went downstairs. They sat on the couch together and turned on the TV. Rugrats was on, a show they both enjoyed. Cool, let's watch this, Jessica said. After about ten minutes, a commercial came on. Jessica knew she had to pee, but decided to see if Katie had to go too.
Katie? Do you have to pee?
Uh, yeah, I think I do. Why?
Cause I do too, a lot. Wanna pee together? Let's see who goes the most, Jessica said. Katie giggled.
Yeah, okay! On the count of three. Ready? OnetwoTHREE Katie said as she began concentrating. She relaxed herself and became wetting her diaper, letting the pee flow fast as it began to soak up the padding of her diaper. Jessica began wetting hers, completely enjoying every minute of the sensation of the warm pee trickling down her skin and filling her diaper. Both girls kept a smile on their face. Jessica moved closer to Katie and started to cuddle with her. She was not a lesbian, but enjoyed cuddling with her good friend. Katie didn't mind and cuddled right with her.
I'mI'm still peeing, Jessica said proudly.
Wow, you're really filling your diaper, aren't ya? I was done a few seconds ago and my diaper feels pretty soggy now, she said. Jessica was silent for a few more seconds, still peeing and enjoying every moment. She finally finished, and her diaper was completely soaked, and it showed.
Ahhh, there, I'm done too. I guess I win, she said while giggling. Katie looked at the front of Jessica's diaper and gasped. Wow, you sure are wet! It isn't gonna leak, is it? Katie asked in a concerned tone.
Nah, these diapers hold a lot. They are able to hold all my night wettings. It is very soggy, though. I guess we should get changed soon, Jessica said.
Yeah, but we can wait till Rugrats is over. I don't wanna miss it. Besides, a wet diaper feels sooooo good when it's still warm, Katie said. Jessica nodded. The show came back on and the girls cuddled with each other until it ended. By this time, their diapers were beginning to get cold and they decided they'd better go get changed. They both walked into the living room where Katie's parents were.
Mommy? Katie said.
Yes, sweetie? You two are wet, right? her mom asked. The girls both nodded. She smiled. No problem. I'll change Jessica and your daddy will change you, okay sweetie? Katie nodded. Okay Jessica. Just lay down on the floor here. I'll go get your diaper bag, Katie's mom said. Jessica lay on the floor and waited as Katie's mother got the diaper bag. She came back down shortly and proceeded to untape her diaper and slide it off. My goodness. This is one full diaper. I thought Katie was a big wetter, she said while smiling. Jessica smiled, yeah, I go a lot sometimes. Katie's mother continued to change Jessica's diaper. She really liked how Katie's mother changed her. She seemed very gentle to her. Not that Jessica's mother didn't do a good job, but Katie's mom just seemed extra gentle and kind during changes. Jessica figured it was because Katie's mother had been changing Katie all of Katie's life, and was more used to it.
After the girls were changed, they decided to go upstairs to play with toys. After an hour, Katie announced that she had to poop. As long as we're making a game out of when we go in our diapies, do you have to poop, too? Katie asked. Jessica didn't feel like she had to. No, not yet, I don't think.
It's okay. I'll wait till you have to, then we can go together, she said. Jessica liked that idea. I'm sure I'll have to go soon, she said. They continued to play. After another thirty minutes, Jessica now had to poop. Hey, I gotta go now. On three?
Okay! Onetwothree! Both girls stood up and hunched over a little and began grunting. Katie began filling her diaper first. She filled it almost to capacity and was very proud of what she had done. She sighed and sat down in it, smiling even more. Oh yeah! I poopied so much, she said. Jessica was still straining and grunting, but finally started to push her BM into her diaper. I'mstillgoin, she said while continuing to grunt and push.
Oh, wow, you must be doing a real big one! Katie exclaimed. Indeed, Jessica was filling her diaper full. When she had to poop, it always was a full load. Jessica finally announced she was done, and sat down to enjoy her messy diaper. Katie smiled and looked at her diaper. Wow, I can tell you filled that one fuller than me! You win again! Katie said. They both giggled. They stayed in their poopy diapers for several minutes before going to get changed.
That's a good girl, Jessica, Katie's mother said while removing her diaper. Your mother had told me that you were having some problems pooping your diaper, but now I see it's no problem at all. Jessica smiled. Yeah, I guess I was afraid at first but now it's great. I love my diapers, she said proudly. Katie's mother smiled and finished changing her. The girls decided to go outside for a while to see if any kids were at the playground. Emily was the only kid there. She was happy when she saw Jessica and Katie approaching and began jumping up and down like an excited toddler who was just told she's going to Disney World.
Jessica! Katie!! You gonna play wif me? Emily asked excitedly. Emily was six, but she acted a little babyish for her age. No one minded. It was cute. Jessica and Katie smiled. Sure, we can play. What do you want to do, Katie asked.
First I gotta pee! Do you gotta pee? Emily asked.
No, we don't. We were just changed. Go ahead, Emie. We'll time you! See how fast you can pee your diaper, Jessica said. Emily smiled. Awwite, here I go! Emily said. Jessica started her stopwatch and began counting as Emily peed in her diaper.
Thirteenfourteenfifteensixteendone yet? Jessica asked. Emily shook her head. Jessica continued to count. Twenty, twenty-one, twenty-two, twenty-three, twen
I done! Emily interrupted. She felt the front of her diaper and began running around happily. I wets a wot! But no leaky, she said while giggling. Jessica and Katie laughed.
You wanna keep playing, or get changed? Katie asked her. Emily decided she would play for a while. She too loved the feeling of a freshly soaked diaper. The girls played a few games of tag, then they played on the swings. After a while, it got dark. Katie's mother came outside and told us it was time to come in. Emily's mother came over to the park to look for her daughter.
Oh, there you are sweetie. It's getting close to bedtime, let's go inside, she said while holding out her hand for Emily to grab on to.
Okay Mommy. Hey Mommy, guess what! Emily said.
What, sweetie?
Mommy, lookie! I wet my diapee! I wet it a wot!! She said happily. Her mother hugged her and kissed her cheek. Aww, that's my girl. Let's go get you changed, she said. Emily waved goodbye to Jessica and Katie and went inside with her mother.
The girls went inside and got changed into their pajamas. They both wet one more time before bed and got changed and then tucked in to bed. They laid in Katie's room and talked for a few hours. Mostly about diapers and about what they'd do the next day. Jessica was really starting to like this place. After a while, they both grew tired and fell fast asleep. They both woke up the next morning with soaking wet diapers. Jessica had won the game, again, having the wettest diaper.
I guess I gotta drink more and maybe I can win at this someday before I'm potty trained, Katie said. Jessica giggled. Yeah, drink a lot of Kool-Aid. That works for me, she said.
What is "Infantilism?"
Infantilism, if you will excuse the pun, is the urge to be pampered. In some, it is wanting to snuggle close by a maternal lover's side, as if helpless once again in mommy's arms. In others, it is the longing to be literally back in diapers. In still others, it is the delightful humiliation of being just a "Big Baby." Yet others have more of a fetish, a sexual attraction for diapers or other infantile objects. Infantilism is a set of variations with a common theme: Diapers and Babyhood. Typically, an infantilist realizes he is different between the ages of five and fifteen. He realizes that he has a strong desire that most people do not share. Generally, these desires are hidden, kept as a dark secret. He feels that only he, out of all humanity, is like this. It is nearly harmless in and of itself, but he still represses it. He fears disgrace, ridicule as a pervert or a weirdo. He fears being abnormal.
Infantilism is a paraphilia. Paraphilias are unusual desires that people have. Common examples include masochism and rubber fetishes. Typically, these are focused, deep longings. They are often are life-long. As evidence to the persistence of these urges, many who have them struggle desperately against them for years or decades, and very few, if any, can claim to have become free of them.
Does it involve Children?
While these urges involve infantile themes, they differ from Pedophilia. Pedophiles focus on children, while infantilists become infants themselves, or diaper themselves, etc. To illustrate this subject-object distinction, consider dresses. Transvestism (men who love to dress like women) is clearly different from male heterosexuality (men who love women in dresses). One deals with how a person sees himself (the subject) while the other deals with what that person is looking for in someone else (the object).
What do Infantilists Do?
Diapers are a central theme in infantilism. However, just as cars are similar but not the same, infantilism has a range of emphasies and applications . Some infantilists are similar to transvestites, except that instead dressing like a woman, they dress as a baby. They shed the cares of adulthood, and assume the role of a baby or small child. They breifly visit with their more cuddly side. Some others will get a mosichistic enjoyment from the loss of control, from being reduced to just a baby. They may get spanked, scolded, or humilated. Still others will use diapers as fetish objects. The balance of these emphasies differs from one infantilist to another.
Is Infantilism Safe?
Infantilism is not directly harmful. Biologically, it may be the safest sex around. However, there are indirect psychological and social dangers. "Paraphilia" and "infantilism" aren't part of the common vocabulary. The common word is "pervert." So infantilists often grow up thinking of themselves as perverts. Often, they think that they are the only ones that are so far from "normal." This drives some to social isolation, despair, and sometimes suicide. These are the dangers associated with infantilism, but they are not directly caused by it. The guilt and isolation can be shed. When this happens, most of the danger passes. There are also social risks. For example, a wife may be angry that her husband's infantilism was hidden from her, or hurt because he loves diapers more than her. At the workplace, the disgrace of infantilism could end a career. These indirect dangers are a result of how infantilism is handled, both by our culture, and by ourselves.
I'm sorry, I just don't see how what I said was flame bait. Somebody asked why they were using Real Audio instead of MP3, and my answer was the streaming capabilities of Real. If it sounded like I was saying Real was better than MP3 or OGG, then I apologize for not being clearer in what I was saying.
Let me clarify my point: Real is a dedicated server/streaming solution. It's made by a company that is dedicated to providing that support. Ogg or MP3 is probably superior, but when you make a business decision, the company you're getting it from is a big consideration.
"Derp de derp."
This FAQ is designed to give tips on trolling on Slashdot, created in celebration of Blackout Week. It is dedicated to all hard-working trolls and crapflooders.
What are some good trolling tips?
Trolling is all about making people think you care, and so winding up those who care for real. Think of it like shooting a deer in front of an anti-hunt protester, or eating a Big Mac in front of a vegan. Here are some ideas for making your troll work:
How do I crapflood?
A crapflood is an (intentionally) content-free post. Here are some suggestions for the source of your crapflood -- remember to take care with repetition, odd characters, or repetition, to get past the lameness filter:
How do I widen pages?
A method is known and delivered to us by the beautiful Klerck which currently works in Internet Explorer alone. This will therefore ruin the browsing experience of by far the majority of Slashdot readers. Start with the text:
http://www.eveeieyhfgfcdoosammgwsnboivvbsczxlzgabc /
then repeat /ooieiabdcdjsvbkeldfogjhiyeeejkagclmieooionoepdk /
several times, remembering to avoid the compression filter trap by using different random characters.How do I karma whore?
"Karma whoring" is the practice of gaining moderation points for their own sake. It is particularly useful in techniques for defeating the moderation system. Some tips for karma whoring are:
How do I defeat the moderation system?
The moderation system is far from flawless. Here are some ways to devalue it:
How do I defeat authentication?
Don't. The FBI will arrest you for being a terrorist. Instead, make an authoritative nick like CmdrTaco (editor). The majority of people are easily fooled, and will be likely to take notice of and respond to your post, and even moderate it up. Think of it like Lunix Turvalds walking into the room -- people listen to what he has to say, and don't dare disagree.
How do I defeat the goatse link early warning system?
Simple -- use one of the many foolishly implemented redirector URLs hosted on well-known sites. Here's an innocuous recent example which pretends to link to the highly informative about.com, but in fact links to a site of the popular 90's lesbian band The Spice Girls: Informative link which will get me karma
What are some excellent sites to sneakily link to?
Mostly, you should link to gay porn. If you are reading this FAQ, you already know the URLs, so I don't need to supply them, except to say that it's almost an initiation ceremony in Slashdot trolling to link to goatse.
Administrativa
How do I justify the existence of this FAQ?
Slashdot is full of people who support unlicensed weapons ownership and dissemination of bomb creation documents -- in short, they support freedom, even when that freedom could cause harm. This document should be considered as that very freedom in action. Indeed, to disparage or moderate down this document would be un-American, and the FBI are likely to arrest you for being a terrorist.
How do I add to or change this FAQ?
Simply re-post the FAQ on Slashdot, adding an appropriate question, and incrementing the version number by 1. Before doing so, please try to ensure you have the latest version, and remember to keep this post W3C compliant!
How else can I help with the Troll and Crapflooding Cause?
Moderate this post up, re-post it, put it in your journal, and upload it on your website. Thanks!
Me tinks (sorry) that the Ewaks where pretty cool but thats as far as my love for stupid starwarsy animals go. I think Jar Jar should be ground into pod racer fuel in the next episode.... either that or he should be made a Jedi, that'll annoy them! :)
there are laws in place to prevent this sort of thing... at least I think there are and if the current laws aren't up to the challange there are people working overtime to draft new ones. Actually I like the idea of being able to do this, at least for your own purposes as well as the ability to post a patch so you can attach these changes to your own legally bought copy of "The Phantom Menace" without anyone having to shell out extra money to Lucas. That way Lucas still sells 'The Phantom Menace' and new things can be done with the material.
I got this error message today on www.americasflorist.com:
r chant . html
Error Details = Error Code : 350
C:\Inetpub\wwwroot\ihtml\stores\Floristv1\me
iSQL ALIAS="cat" DBNAME="Floristv1" LOGIN="flo1/r18st" SQL="SELECT id, name, code, description FROM category WHERE id=:id AND storeid=1 ORDER BY priority"
A few weeks went by after we got back from our vacation. It was 3 weeks before school was to start again. Mom and Tammy were working with me trying to get me to get used to being a normal eight year old again. I had been regressing so much over the summer that I not only had become totally dependant on my diapers, but I was talking baby talk and exhibiting social skills of a toddler. My family didn't mind that I took summer time to be a true baby, but if I was going to be able to function in school I had to get my social skills back up to normal. But I would still be kept in diapers, and they would not force me to potty train. Mommy had talked to me about this for a while. I was sad that I had to "grow up" but I realized that I had to do it. So as the time wound down for school I once again was able to feed myself. They still bathed, dressed, and diapered me, but all the to her things I had to work on improving. By the week before school I was feeding myself, I was talking "normally" again.
"Wow honey, mommy is so proud of you. You have been such a good girl and cooperated with Daddy and Tammy and I. So we want to take you out to eat and then to a movie ok sweetie?" my mother said to me. "Oh goodie mommy, I am so glad. Thank you for helping me to grow back up for school too." "Your so welcome sweetie."
We got in the car and Tammy, Mommy, Daddy, and I went to Dairy Queen and I had a hot dog and a cookie dough blizzard. Mommy complimented me on how well I was eating and using my manners and all that good stuff. I felt so happy. I was glad I could be a baby and also be an eight year-old girl too.
After we ate we went to the movies and I drank lots of soda and I totally soaked my diaper before the movie was half over. Since it was dark in the theater, Tammy just laid me on some empty seats and changed my diaper since it was just a wet one. I think some people noticed but I didn't really care. I sat in mommy's lap for the rest of the movie and she didn't let me have as much soda this time. It didn't really make ay difference, because when we left the theater my diaper was soaked and squishy as ever. As we headed for the car mommy patted my diapered bottom. "You're such a little squishy butt honey." She said teasingly. I giggled at that and smiled at her. Tammy again changed me in the backseat.
I was so exhausted that I fell asleep on the way home. Daddy carried me into the house and put me in my crib. I vaguely remember Tammy and mommy giving me a kiss goodnight. The next day I woke up it was Sunday. We got ready for church as usual After church we went out to eat with some friends and I made a messy in my diaper. Mommy excused us from the table and took me to the ladies room. She lifted my dress and untapped my disposable diaper and wiped my hiney and powdered me and put another diaper on me. She then got my dress pulled back down and straightened me up. She told me to stay on the changing table while she went into the stall. She had to go poopoo. So after a few minutes I heard the toilet flush and mommy came out and washed her hands. "What a good girl you are. You stayed right where I told you. You're such a good little baby girl." She kissed my forehead and then picked me up and carried me like a little baby out to the table. I always liked it when mommy would pick me up and carry me. But I knew one day I would get to big for her to carry me. But until then, I was very content to be carried.
We finished eating and drove home. Mom put me down for a nap. Mom and Tammy went shopping for back to school supplies since the next day was the first day of school. They always had sales on stuff at the last minute so they could clear it out. SO that is what they were waiting for. Daddy woke me up from my nap and held me on his recliner chair as he watched football. Shortly their after, mommy and Tammy got back. We had dinner and went back to church that night for the evening service. I went in the other building with the kids my age to do a kid's lesson and some activities. While I was there I had a soaked diaper, so I asked an adult if I could leave to go get my mommy to change me. She walked me to the church and got my mother to come back and change me. After that, I returned and we had a snack. By this time everyone was out of church and socializing in the lobby. I found my mom and showed her what I made during arts and crafts. We then left to come home. Tammy didn't go with us because she was at home figuring out what she wanted to wear to her first day of high school. When we got home Tammy was on the phone with her friend Julie. They were coordinating their outfits for the first day of school. I thought this seemed silly.
Mommy came into my room and helped me get my clothes ready for the next day as well. "Honey, are you excited about being third grade?" "Yes mommy I am. I can't wait to see all my friends again at school and to learn new stuff." Mom smiled at me and then left the room. About an hour later she came up and told me it was time for bed. "Why isn't Tammy gonna get me ready for bed tonight mommy?" "She is still busy getting some last minute things together for tomorrow honey. She'll come in and kiss you goodnight though, Ok?" I nodded. Mom helped me brush my teeth and get my diaper changed and got me in my jammies and all tucked in. A few minutes later Tammy came in and stood by the crib next to me. "Hi baby girl. So are you all ready for your big day tomorrow?" I nodded. "Aww. I am kinda nervous about high school, but I will be ok, and so will you Tiffy." "I love you Tammy." "Aww honey, I love you too!" She leaned down and kissed my forehead and stood there looking at me for a while. "You are just so cute and adorable. Now you sleep tight ok?" "otay me will."
Later on that night I awoke in the middle of the night. My diaper wasn't soaked, just a little wet. I lay their for a while thinking about school. I started worrying about my teacher, and the kids at school and everything. I heard someone in the bathroom then I saw Tammy walk past my door to go to her room.
"Tammy Tammy", I whispered. She just leaned back in the doorway. "What is it Tiffy?" "Um I scared Tammy." She came into the room and picked me up out of my crib and held me. "Oh baby there is nothing to be afraid of. Shhh. Go to sleep little one." I started to cry and was sobbing with my head on her shoulder. "Oh baby, do you wanna come sleep with me tonight, hmm?" I looked up at her and nodded. "Ok let's go then." She picked up my blankie and my teddy bear from my crib and carried me and the blanket and the bear into her room. She laid me on her bed, wrapped me in the blanket, and gently placed the soft fluffy teddy bear on me so I could hug him. She then closed her door and crawled into bed with me. She reached out and held onto me, and my bear. She softly talked to me until I was fast asleep.
The next morning we awoke early. Tammy nudged me to wake up. "Come on baby your diapers are all squishy and wetie. Let's go get you changed ok." She picked me up and carried me back over to my room and laid me on the changing table and diapered and dressed me for school. Then from their mommy took me and got me some breakfast while Tammy was getting ready for school.
Tammy left while I was sitting on the floor watching TV. "Bye Tiffy, have a good day ok?" "Ok Tam Tam, you too. Oh, and thank you for being there for me last night when I was scared. I love you. Bye!" "Bye!" she said as she closed the door behind her.
A few minutes later I got up and got my backpack. Mom kissed me goodbye for the day. I walked down the street to the bus stop. "Hi Tiffany!" Laura shouted when she saw me from a distance. I quickly ran to where they were. "Hi Emily." I said as I set my books down next to me while waiting for the bus. "So are you all ready for third grade" Laura nodded her head and Emily said "Yep I am!" I was so glad to be with my two best friends. Even though I had seen them many times in the summer, it was good to go back to school together. I felt better now that I was with them. I wasn't nearly as worried as I had been the night before.
The bus arrived and we all got on and sat down in the back. This was our usual seat. Usually the bad kids would sit at the back of the bus, but since I usually had wet or poopy diapers, they all steered clear of the back seats. So My friends and I had the back to ourselves. That was fine by us. We got to school a while later. We went to our new classroom and sat down for our first class. Our third grade teacher introduced herself and we shared about what we did all summer.
When my turn came I was a bit shy. "So Tiffany, what did you do that was fun this summer?" the teacher asked. "Well, I went on vacation and saw my family. I played with my cousins and went swimming. I stayed at home I played with all my friends. And I got to be a baby all summer too." "A baby How do you mean Tiffany?", the teacher asked with a puzzled look on her face. "Well, my mommy and daddy and my big sister, Tammy, let me be a baby. That's why I wear diapers see." I lifted up my skirt to show off my cute diapers. The kids laughed for a moment but most of them knew about me already. "Well, that sounds very interesting Tiffany. I'm sure you had allot of fun."
After everyone had introduced themselves and talked about how their summer was the teacher assigned us our books. Then by this time, it was recess! As I was sitting with my friends at morning recess, my teacher asked to speak to me. I went over to a less crowded area to talk to her. "I got the note from your mommy about your diapers, so just remember if you need to get changed just ask to go potty and go to the nurse's office to get changed ok sweetheart?" "Ok." I started to walk back to where my friends were when she called out "Tiffany" I turned toward her and paused a moment. "You do remember me right? I came over to your house to visit with your mommy and some friends one night a while back?" Then I remembered that she was the teacher that had hugged me when I had my diaper on and patted my crinkly bottom. "Yes, I remember you now." "Well you sure are a cute little baby when you're all dressed up in your jammies and diapers." I blushed and said thanks. She just smiled at me as I went back to my friends to play for the remainder of recess.
After recess we went back to class and went over the rules and boring stuff like that. It seemed like forever until lunchtime. Finally it came. I went to go get changed. As usual, my friends saved me a seat so that when I got back from my diaper change, I could sit with them. "hi." I said as I set my tray on the table and sat down next to Emily and across from Laura and another girl. "Hi what's your name?" I asked the new girl. "My name is Stacey. What's yours?" "I'm Tiffany, and I guess you already met Laura & Emily. "It's nice to meet you. Um Can I ask you a question?" "Sure, go for it." "Why do you wear diapers?" I paused for a moment thinking of what to say. "Well, I have always wanted to be a baby, and I wear diapers at night because I wet the bed. My mom found something I wrote n my diary towards the end of school last year. It was about how I wished I could be a baby. Well I was playing house with Emily & Laura one day and I got my mom to put me in diapers. Then that night she just let me stay in them and let me be a baby girl ever since." "Wow that's kinda weird! But, if you like that, then I am happy for you." "Thanks. I am glad you are cool with it." We finished eating lunch and talking and then it was time to go back to class.
The afternoon classes went faster than I thought they would. I guess it was because we were learning new stuff and it was very interesting to me. Finally the bell rang and we left to go catch our busses. We boarded the bus and took our seats. Just like clockwork, I had a poopy diaper on the way home. But it was not to bad of a mess. And we were almost to our bus stop. Some kids giggled as Emily & Laura & I walked down the isle to exit the bus. By this point we were used to the usual ridicule. We walked down the street together and then stopped at my house and talked in my front yard for a couple minutes.
"Girls, would you like to come in for a moment and have something to drink?" My mother said as she stood out on the porch. "Yes please!" we all said as we ran like a pack of horses up to the porch and in the door to the kitchen. Mom served us all drinks and came over to me and kissed me on the cheek and patted my bottom. "Oh my, looks like little Tiffany has a poopoo diaper. Come on baby, let's get you changed. We'll be right back girls." Mom took me to my room and changed me and I came out in my baby clothes and diaper. My drink was in a bottle instead of a cup like the other girls. When my mom wasn't looking I unscrewed the nipple and gulped it down. When she came back in the room she was shocked. "My goodness darling, you must have been one thirsty baby!" We all laughed and then Emily & Laura had to go home. I was tired and mommy laid me down in my crib for a short little nap before dinner.
Tammy came home while I was sleeping. This year her high school was within walking distance, so she walked home after school instead of catching a ride with daddy. She gently woke me for dinner and asked me how my day was. During dinner Tammy and I talked to mom and dad about how our day at school went. All Tammy was talking about was how cute some boy was that sat in front of her in history class. I still thought boys were yucky. Tammy smiled at me. You wait, one day you'll change your mind Tiffy.
After dinner Tammy worked on a homework assignment. "How come you got homework your first day, were you bad or something?" I asked with a puzzled look. "No silly, when you get to high school they expect you to do more work." "Me never wanna go high school Tammy, me go to pre-school!" "Oh you silly baby hush up." She said as she swatted my diapered bottom playfully. I tackled her and tried to tickle her. She was to big for me and soon she had me on the floor and tickled me. "I went tinkle sin my diaper!" I shouted. She stopped tickling me. "Haha I made baby wet her diaper I made baby wet her diaper" "No you didn't!" "Yes I did you silly tinkle diaper baby!" She got up and ran and I tried to chase her but I was waddling in my diapers and I couldn't keep up. Then she snuck around behind me and picked me up and held me. "I was just teasing you, you silly little baby." She kissed my forehead and my cheek and then my nose and my chin. "Eww! Tammy, that's yucky! Stop!" Just then mom came in. "What are you two up to now?" "We are just playing mommy." I said as I smiled. "Well ok but you two need to simmer down. It's close to Tiffany's bedtime and we don't need her all wound up ok Tammy." "Yes Mom." Tammy put me down and I watched TV in the living room while Tammy finished her assignment.
"Tiffany It's time for bed honey." Mommy said as she got up off the couch. "Let's go honey" "No mommy, I wanna watch TV!" "No, It's a school night, you know you can't stay up late on school nights. Now come on Tiffy, let's go." I reluctantly got up and fallowed her into the bathroom. She brushed my teeth and then took my to my room got my diapers changed and put me in my jammies. She tucked me in. "I miss Tammy tucking me in." "oh honey, you will have to get used to it. Now Tammy is in high school and she will be busier. But she will come in and kiss you goodnight. Ok sweetie?" "No. I don't like high school. It take my Tam Tam away from me. I not like it at all mommy." I started to cry. Tammy came in the room. "What's the matter Tiffany?" "She's upset because you are busy with school stuff. I think she's afraid that you wont take time to play with her and care for her like you used to honey." "Oh Tiffany, that's not true. I always have time for you. Mom, do you mind, I'll go ahead and tuck her in for the night and you can go read the paper. I need to talk to her. Is that ok?" "Oh sure Tammy, go ahead. Night Tiffany." She said as she exited my room.
Tammy picked me up out of my crib and sat on a chair next to my changing table and held me in her lap. "Now what's all this silly talk about me not playing with you and taking care of you anymore? You know better than that Tiffany. I love you. You're my little baby sister. I will always take care of you. And don't you forget it either ok. Now come on, cheer up. I am not going anywhere. Ok?" "Ok." I said as I sniffled. "Aww baby, here let me wipe away your tears." She wiped my tears from my cheeks with her t-shirt. She held me there in her lap and let me lay my head on her shoulder and she hummed quietly to me and patted my diapered bottom and rocked me slowly side to side. I fell asleep in her arms and she gently laid me in my crib. I never slept so good as I did that night. Tammy put to rest all my fears of a new year at school. She was always good at making me feel better. I hoped she understood how much I loved her too.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't HTTP streaming mean that if you fall under the required bitrate that you'll get broken up music?
If so, does M3u have server support for changing bitrates during a change in net conditions?
"Derp de derp."
The next morning I woke up and Tammy was getting ready to leave for school. She came in and gave me a hug and kiss goodbye and then mom came in to change me. I was soaked as usual. I had my breakfast and then went down the street to catch the bus.
I stood there for a while talking to my friends. The bus came late and we even got to school late. Our teacher knew we would be late due to the bus being late. We came into the classroom and took our seats. We were studying reading. I had to read out loud, which I hated to do. Finally morning recess came. I stopped by the nurse's office for a quick change since I was wet. I then rejoined my friends outside.
We were playing tag and running around the school yard. When I came up to Emily to tag her I noticed that her pants were all wet. "Um Emily, I think you wet yourself." "Oh no, not again." she said as she started to cry. "Oh its ok, don't cry, come on I'll walk with you to the office and you can call your mom and get dry clothes ok. I asked the teacher if I could go with Emily to the office. She said I could so I walked with her.
The secretary saw that Emily was wet and then directed us back to a room where they had some extra clothes for other kids that had accidents. Emily was sort of embarrassed but I comforted her and told her everything would be ok. By the time she got changed we had to go back to class.
Later on at lunch a lot of kids were making fun of her. She started to cry but Laura and I were sticking up for her. "Leave her alone you big ugly jerk!" I yelled at one boy who kept teasing her. They backed off a little bit but still some of them would make sly comments to her. "Don't worry Emily, it's gonna be ok. They are just being mean. Laura and I love you and we are your bestest friends." I gave her another hug. We then went back to the classroom for our afternoon classes.
Emily raised her hand in the middle of social studies and asked to go to the restroom. When she stood up to leave the room all of a sudden she started to pee in her pants. She started crying again. The teacher took her to the office this time and she came back in yet another set of dry clothes. This time the kids were really being mean to her. "Emily needs diapers like Tiffany!", one boy kept saying. He was always being mean to everyone. I told him to shut up and he started teasing me about my diapers. I didn't really care though because I was more concerned for Emily. I wondered why she was having so many accidents lately.
The bell finally rang and we all got up and went to the bus. Emily, Laura, and I sat at our usual seat. "Hey Emily?" "Yeah?" "Um what's wrong? I mean you have been going potty in your pants a lot lately. Is something bothering you? You wanna talk about it. Laura and I are always here for you. You know we love you." We both turned inward toward Emily who was sitting in the middle. I was on the isle seat this time. We both put an arm around her. She started to cry. She told us that her parents put her in diapers at night because she also started wetting the bed, like me. She said that she also has had a lot of day time accidents lately too. She told us that if her mom found out about what happened at school that she'd probably have to be in diapers all day too. I told her that it would be ok if she was. She said she kind of liked them a little, but was to embarrassed to wear them to school. She was afraid that the kids would really tease her a lot. I just kept telling her that things would be ok and that they teased me at first but they don't do it nearly as much anymore. Laura even liked diapers and wore them when she came over to play at my house sometimes. "Emily, its ok , diapers feel good, I mean I don't wear them, but I have a few times at Tiffany's house. It's ok if you wear diapers. It is cool with me."
Finally we got Emily to stop crying. We walked her up the road to her house today. Her mom was waiting for her on the porch. She knew what had happened at school and was mad at Emily. She told us to go on home and that she needed to talk to Emily. Laura and I left and went to our houses. I was worried about Emily though. Her mom was nice usually, but she seemed upset about this.
"So how was your day sweetie?" my mom asked when I came in the door. "oh it was ok I guess." "Is something bothering you honey?" "Um, well yeah kinda. Emily wet her pants today at school twice. And she told me that she had other accidents at home too. Her mommy is gonna put her in diapers now, like me. But she is scared because she doesn't want the kids at school to tease her. But Laura and I made her feel better." "Aww, well maybe I will go talk to her mommy tonight and see if I can be of any help. I am sure she's just worried about Emily" "Yeah but she seemed mad though mommy" "Well sometimes people get mad when they are worried about something. I am sure she's not mad at Emily." "Yeah you're right mommy." "So how's this diaper doing" mommy said as she patted my diaper and put her hand on the front side. "Do you have to go poopy? Usually you do a load on the way home from school, but you only wet this time." "Yeah um, I do have to go poo. I guess I was to busy talking with Emily to take time to do it." Oh ok baby, well go sit down and watch cartoons and call me when your diaper is messy ok?" "Ok mommy." I sat down at the TV and laid back on my bean bag and relaxed.
After a while I felt the need to go poo, so I began to fill my diaper. I fell asleep in my poopy diaper and mom nudged me awake later. "Honey, you were supposed to come get me when you did a messy in your diaper." "Oh I sowwy mommy I fell asleep." "It's ok little one. Come on let's go get you changed." Mom carried me to my room and changed my diaper. Soon after that Tammy got home.
"Hey Tiffany, hi mom.", She said as she threw her books down on the floor in the living room. "Hey sweetie, how was school today?" "Oh it was a drag. My math teacher sucks." "Now Tammy, be nice." "oh ok, but still, he is such a jerk. I got a 75 on my stupid math quiz." "Well dear, maybe if you would have studied more you would have gotten a better grade." "Yeah, I guess. I gotta pee, I'll be back in a little while."
A few minutes later she came out of the bathroom. She sat on the couch and talked to me a bit while mom was making dinner. Dad soon came home and we ate dinner. After dinner Tammy was busy doing her homework. I was playing with my toys. I had already finished my home work in class. Since I was in 3'rd grade, I didn't really have that much.
I walked into Tammy's room. "Hey Tiffy, what's up?" "Oh nothing. I am just worried about Emily." "What's wrong with Emily?" "Well she's been wetting her pants a lot lately and her mommy is worried about her. I am too." "Oh I'm sure its just a phase she's going through or something. It will be ok Tiffy." "Me hope so. Hey Tammy, can you play with me?" "In a little while, I need to finis 10 more math problems and then I will be done my homework. Ok?" "Otay Tam Tam." I left the room and as I was walking down the hall I stopped for a moment and tinkled in my diaper. "Do you need changing yet?" I was startled, mom had snuck up behind me. "I saw you going potty in your diaper just now. Do you need changing yet?" I blushed. "I will take that as a yes. Come on, lets go." She put me on the changing table and changed me.
About 15 minutes later Tammy came into my room. "You ready to play? I nodded and then I got a game out. "First, do you need to be changed?" "No, mommy just changed me a while ago." "Oh ok cool. So what are we playing tonight?" "Candy Land!" I smiled at Tammy. "Again? We played that 3 times this week." "Yeah but me like this game." I put on my cute little irresistible face. "Oh ok then, we will play Candy Land." Tammy got the game out and set it up. We played for a while until mom came in and told me it was bedtime. Tammy got me ready for bed and tucked me in.
"Go to sleep now ok Tiffany." Tammy said as she finished reading me a bed time story. Mom came in and kissed me goodnight too. They both left the room and closed the door. I didn't fall asleep right away. I was still thinking about Emily. I finally wore myself out from thinking and fell asleep. I was hugging my teddy bear tightly.
Tammy woke me up the next morning. I was very sleepy. "Wake up sleepy head." She said while picking me up out of my crib and checking my diapers. "Well someone went potty in there dipees last night huh?" I smiled at her. She changed me and then left for school. Mom dressed me and then I had breakfast.
As I walked down the street to the bus stop, I saw some pretty flowers growing along side the road. I picked a few of them and when I got to the bus stop I gave them to Emily. "Aww thanks! That is so sweet of you." Laura grinned at me and jokingly asked where her flowers were. "Well go potty in your pants and I'll give you flowers too." "Yeah right, I don't think so Tiffany." She giggled. "So how did it go with your mom last night Emily?" "Um well" Emily blushed and then grinned as she lifted her skirt a bit and let Laura and I see her cute little diapers. "Oh my goodness! You are in diapers?" I whispered. "Yeppers. My mommy said I should wear diapers and that I can get changed with you at the nurse's office. Your mommy came to my house last night and talked with my mom for a while. " "Cool!" I said. "Aren't you embarrassed though?" Laura asked her. "Well sort of, but my mommy said that since I'm not the only kid in my class in diapers that they probably won't tease me to much. And besides I got my real friends right here." She gave Laura and I a hug.
The bus came, we got on and took our seats. We continued to talk on the way to school about everything. I told Emily that I was worried about her all last night. I was glad that everything worked out ok for her though. When we got to school Emily took a bag by the nurse's office which had a few diapers that her mom had sent along with her. When she came to the class and sat down in front of me I leaned forward and whispered in her ear. "Hey crinkle butt." She turned around and blushed. I just smiled at her. She knew I was just teasing her in a playful way. Since I was in diapers she didn't mind if I joked with her. Some kids noticed her crinkling sound as well and made fun of her but the teacher stopped them.
At lunch we both went to the nurse's office. "Wow now there is two cute little babies with diapers to be changed." Mrs. Peters jokingly said. "So who is going first?" "Let Emily go, since she's new to this." I said. So Emily hopped up on the table and got changed. Then I did as well. We went to lunch and got through the line and sat with Laura. "Well I might as well get diapers too, so I can be late for lunch. It's weird sitting here by myself while you two go get changed." We both laughed. We ate and then went outside for a while and then went back to class.
The afternoon dragged on. I was sort of board with what we were studying. I kept daydreaming. "Tiffany, do you know the answer to question seven?", the teacher asked. I was not really paying attention. "Um, well I, uh, I think" "Tiffany, you need to pay attention and stop daydreaming ok?" "Ok." Finally the bell rang and we went out to catch the bus home. "I'm wet Tiffany." "me too Emily." "I gotta go pee." Laura said as she ran from the bus area to the girls room and then rejoined us. Just then I wet my diaper more. "You just wet again didn't you Tiffany?" Emily asked. "Yeah." Emily whispered in my ear, "I really gotta go number two, I don't know if I can wait till we get home." "Oh it's ok, I've done that plenty of times, they will probably all think it's me" We both laughed.
Finally the bus got to our stop and we got off. Emily stopped for a moment as we walked down the street. "What are you doing?" Laura asked. "You don't wanna know." I smiled at her. "You're going poopy in your diapers aren't you?" "Yeah Tiffany, How did you know? "You silly, I know because I do it all the time, duh." Laura just shook her head. A moment later Emily was done and we continued to walk to our homes.
I got home and was changed out of my wet diaper and I took a nap because I was tired. We ate dinner after Tammy and daddy got home. As usual Tammy was working on her homework. I just played a little, did some work, and called Laura and Emily on 3-way for a while. Mom came in and got me ready for bed around nine. Tammy came in to kiss me goodnight and daddy came in after her. I fell right to sleep. I don't know why I was so tired, but I was, and so I slept very soundly and had a good night sleep.
Or perhaps we should chew your food for you and wipe your ass too?
Don't bother to respond; someone as clueless or self-indulgent as you is very unlikely to have anything useful or interesting to contribute here.
This is not a troll, it is a perfectly reasonable response to a perfectly useless posting. "dangermouse" could have invested the ame effort into getting an answer as they did whining about not knowing and for somebody to puhlease spoonfeed them.
I don't read ACs: If a post isn't worth so much as a nom de plume to its author then I wont bother either.
A few minutes later she got back. We went to recess and then after recess we had our art class which was only 30 minutes. Emily and I made cards for Laura. Our teacher thought it was a very nice thing to do. We went to lunch and got our food and sat down. "Wow, the one day that we didn't have to get our diapers changed before lunch, is the one day Laura isn't here. Isn't that ironic?" "Yeah, especially since she's always complaining that she has to sit alone and wait for us." We both giggled and then continued to eat.
After lunch we went to the auditorium because they had a special speaker come in to talk to us about drugs. It was really boring and so Emily and I talked quietly to each other as we sat in the back of the auditorium. Our teacher told us to be quiet several times but after a few minutes we were at it again. Finally it was over. We went to our classroom. We only had 30 minutes left so the teacher gave us free time. I finished a few assignments so I wouldn't have to do them at home later tonight. I also remembered that tonight was the first night of the revival meetings at church. I asked Emily to come with me. She said she'd ask her mommy.
Finally the bell rang and we got on the bus and went home. We were quieter than usual. I guess because we talked each other's ears off during the "Just Say No To Drugs" thingy. I walked with Emily to her house to see if she could come with me tonight. Her mom said yes. She changed her, and gave her a bag with some extra diapers and let her come home with me. We got to my house. "Hey mom, Emily is gonna go with us to the revival meeting tonight at church." "Oh great, I was hoping you would invite someone. "Where's Laura, did you invite her?" "No mommy, she's sick. She wasn't even at school today." "Oh I'm sorry to hear that." "But we made her get well cards in art class today. Hey mommy, can Emily and I take them over to her before dinner? Please?" "Oh ok, but don't take to long, I'm sure if she's sick she doesn't want to talk to long ok girls?" "ok mommy."
We walked over to Laura's house and rang the doorbell. A moment later her mom came out. "Hi girls. How are you?" We both said we were good and that we also wanted to give Laura the cards we made in school. She invited us in. Laura was laying on the couch. "Hi." She said faintly. "Wow you really do look sick. I hope you get better soon." I said. "Yeah me too." Emily said as she handed Laura her card. Laura's face lit up and she smiled as she read it. I also gave her mine. "Thank you SO much! I would hug you but I don't want you to get what I have." "Oh it's ok, you can hug us later." We all laughed. "Well we will go and let you rest. We are going to revival at church tonight. But don't worry, it will be all the way through Sunday, so if you get better, we will bring you with us then. Ok?" Laura nodded. She thanked us again as we left. Her mother came outside just as we were a heading down the street. "Girls!" We turned to look at her. "Yes?" "That was very kind of you to make those cards for Laura. I am sure that made her feel better." "Your welcome." We both said as we turned and continued on the way back to my house.
We got in the door. Mom had ordered pizza and it arrived shortly after Tammy got home. "Hey Emily, are you coming with us tonight for revival?" "Yep, I sure am." "Cool." "We're having pizza honey. Can you do me a favor?" "Sure mom." "Go change both of the girls and wash up and Ill get the plates and drinks and all that ready ok?" "Sure Come on you two. Let's get you changed ok?" We fallowed her into my room. Mom was in the kitchen getting dinner ready. After changing us, Tammy washed her hands and then helped Emily and I. She treated us like babies, and we played along. It was fun. Tammy was so nice to me and to my friends.
We ate and I got stuff all over my hands and face and chin. "It's a good thing you and Emily have bibs on or you'd be a mess." "Yeah you would." Tammy smiled at us. We got washed up again and then got in the car. We pulled into the church around 6:30. We had to come early to get good seats. Usually when we had revival, we had allot more people than usual.
We all talked and had a good time with some of the other kids. As it got close to time to start Tammy came and got us and we all sat down. We were in the seventh row back. We had lots of singing and it was really fun. Then the evangelist came up and opened up with prayer and then began to preach."
"We are going to be talking tonight about religion." Everyone looked at him with a puzzled look for a moment. "You see, we got a whole lot of religion today. We got ALL kinds of people who are religions. I am here to tell you that your religion will NOT get you into heaven. Some of you been in church you whole life and all you got is religion! Some of yall been reading the bible, been baptized, taking communion. All this to fulfill your religious duty? Religion. Let's look at religion for a moment. Religion is a set of rules and regulations that if fallowed will get you to heaven. Everyone has their own ideas and their own religion it seems today. I am here to tell you that Jesus came 2000 years ago, he died to get you out of your religion and into a relationship. He came not to teach more religion, not to start more religions and sects, but to save us! Can I get an amen!" "AMEN"
"The bible tells us that we are ALL born in sin. There is not one righteous, no NOT ONE! Christ came to die for us to take away our sins. He died on the cross so that you could go free. There is no name given under heaven by which you can be saved, but the name of Jesus. Religion says you can earn God's approval by your outward actions. Jesus faced the religious community of his days. Going around, condemning people with there laws and ways. And Jesus was preaching deliverance, and an inner working. Which would only come through salvation and that salvation comes only from Jesus Christ. I want to tell you this. You may be out there saying I go to church, I give money, I give my time, I help teach Sunday school. If you been teaching the bible and missing Jesus as savior, you have missed the boat. But it's not to late. That's hwy You are here tonight. Jesus can even save church people! Hallelujah!" AMEN!
"Some of you look good on the outside. But you are UGLY on the inside. You and your selfish motives. Jesus came to set you free! Not so you can walk around like some holly roller and preach and be all high and mighty on the outside, and have sin in your life and be defeated and lost on the inside! God so loved the world, He gave His ONLY begotten son JESUS, to DIE on the cross for us. And who ever believes! I said who ever believes on HIM, will not die, but have everlasting life! That life I'm talking about is not just when you die and go to heaven, but it begins right here and now. The minute you confess your sins, and ask Jesus into your heart he will come in. He will put his Holy Spirit in you. You won't be the old you anymore. You'll have JOY unspeakable and FULL of glory! Hallelujah!" AMEN!
"Now I'm gonna ask some of you to come down here to this altar tonight. I'm calling for anyone who doesn't have Jesus in there life and hasn't been saved. You may say, I THINK I am saved. But let me tell you this, if you are truly saved, you WILL KNOW IT! It will be clear not only to you but to those around you. I'm calling good people to come down here tonight and confess there sins. WE ALL were BORN into SIN! I don't care if you love your family, love your friends, give to your church. Kids I don't care if you have a 4.0 GPA, I don't care if you are good, and helpful to your mother! If you don't have Jesus, you are lost. Good works will not get you into the kingdom of God. I'm calling moms, dads, kids, anyone who's here tonight. If you haven't asked Jesus to come into your life and SAVE you, I hope you will do so before you leave here tonight."
"Dear Lord, I pray that you will work mightily with these people. Lord Jesus I pray that you will convict their hearts. Show them that they have a need for a personal relationship with you. Show them father, that they need to have their sins washed away by the blood of your Son. In Jesus' Name Amen."
"As they play some soft music we will sing 2 verses of Just as I am. I do not believe in dragging out the altar call. If you are going to come you will do it within the first verse. Just remember, you take the first step, and He will walk with you the rest of the way. Jesus said that if we were ashamed to profess him publicly that He would receive you in the final day. Don't worry about what the person sitting next to you will think. Don't worry about what you've done. You may be a murderer, a rapist, or anything. You may be a nice person, but no matter what. COME TO JESUS TONIGHT. Come now as we sing"
They began to sing the song. Emily and I were being very quiet. We could feel that something awesome was going on there. I looked over at Tammy and she had tears running down her face. A few seconds later I looked over and she was gone. I looked to my right and then I saw her going down the isle to the altar. Mom was praying and so were some people in front of us. I saw lots of people going forward. There was a guy in the back who looked like he was homeless and he went down. I even saw one of the drug dealers from down town going forward. I was amazed at all this. I didn't completely get it all, but I was watching everything intently.
The evangelist was kneeling at the altar praying with each person who went down. They continued to play very softly in the background as he prayed with each person. I heard allot of people crying. I wondered why they were all so sad. When he kneeled to pray with Tammy I could here her crying too. I watched as he finished going down the row. They all came back to their seats. I hugged Tammy. "What's wrong? Why you crying Tammy?" She smiled at me and hugged me. "I'm so happy now. And I was so sad before, I'll try to explain later ok. All I can tell you is Jesus is in my heart now."
"Well now I see the Lord was working here tonight in a mighty way. It always does my heart good to see people come to the Lord Jesus. I would like at this time to open it up for testimonies. Why don't some of you stand up and tell us what the Lord has done for you tonight."
A lady in her mid thirties stood up. She too was crying. "I have been saved since I was a little girl. But it seemed like in the past few years I have got to busy with thigns and I lost track of that. I stopped spending time with God and reading his word. But tonight I just felt God convict me of that and I rededicated my life to Christ tonight." She sat down and the evangelist said praise God and asked for others to stand and share what God had done for them.
A man in the back stood up. "I been dealing drugs and in the gang for years now. I don't got no family, I can't keep no job. It been living hell most of my life. I came in here tonight just to see if there was any hope for me. I finally understood what this guy was preachin' and I went forward. I confessed my sins to Jesus, and I got joy now. I am so happy. Yeah, I ain't got a lot still in my life, but It don't matter no more. Cuz now I got Jesus, and I am trusting him. I don't know what will happen if I try to leave the gang and all that, but I know that if I die, I gonna go to heaven with Jesus. I hope yall will pray for me. I'm gonna start coming here and I wanna serve God with the rest of my life. Lord know I wasted enough of it doing the devil's thang. I'm done with his junk man, I'm following God now." We all clapped and said Amen and were very excited for this guy. The evangelist was just talking about how Jesus can save anyone and he gave his testimony about growing up and stuff. "Well I don't wanna stop now, let's continue to share. Anyone else?"
Tammy stood up and was wiping away her tears with a tissue. "I... I got saved tonight. I have been in church since I was a baby. I was always nice. I get good grades in school. I just thought because I was a member of the church and because I was good that I was gonna make it to heaven. But I realized tonight that I was lost and headed for hell. And... I... I love Jesus, H's in my heart now. He forgave my sins and..." She was crying even more now. "I... I have joy now more than ever before. I have more love than I ever had. I can't explain this, I just know that I am truly saved tonight. I am glad God spoke to my heart and that I know the truth now, and I will share him with my friends & family that don't know him. I I just can't explain what I feel. It's good, I am so thankful that Jesus loved me enough to die like that for me and I'm glad I am not deceived by thinking that being good and going to church will save me. I think a lot of people get that way. I am so thankful for what God has done in my life." She sat down and blew her nose and then mom hugged her and so did I. Emily gave her a hug as well.
When everyone was done the evangelist closed the service and we all had some refreshments and then went home. I could really tell that Tammy was different now. It was late so when we got home Tammy took me inside while mom dropped off Emily. Tammy got me ready for bed and she tucked me in. "Jesus loves you Tiffany, and so do I." She gave me a kiss and told me that tomorrow after school she was going to talk to me more about Jesus, and try to help me understand how to have him in my heart." I was happy. I could feel something different tonight. Just being their at the revival meeting did something to me. I fell asleep after thinking a while.
The trade federation is, I think, meant to be Chinese, not Japanese (I'm part-Japanese myself). As well, Anakin's flitting slave-owner is supposed to be vaguely eastern European / Jewish, near as I can tell (accented, haggles over money, big nose -- I mean, Jesus Christ!).
To be honest, it annoyed me first time I saw the film, and it only got worse with repeat viewings. If Lucas meant to make the film to satisfy himself only, as has been claimed by others at Slashdot (sorry, can't be arsed to find the reference), you have to wonder just what the fuck he was thinking when he wrote the screenplay.
To address your last comment, though, Tolkien wrote LOTR many years ago. Lucas doesn't really have that excuse, and in my view, doesn't deserve an out. Just my opinion.
========================================
Death will come, and will have your eyes
-- Pavese
It is interesting this is posted about 2 weeks before the next Star Wars movie. I guess it is to remind us about it. Most people - scf-fi fans and otherwise - are looking forward to the Spiderman movie (recent trailer had him swooping just over a bunch of yellow cabs in NY; very good.) Besides Spiderman, most people interested in ci-Fi are waiting for the second Lord of The Rings movie. I grew up with Star Wars (was 12 when the first movie came out.) but I don't see the interest anymore. I think more people are waiting for the next X-Men movie than a SW movie in which we know that Anakin gets involved with Queen whats-her-name and starts becoming Darth Vader. Lucus probably went with his alledged last 3 movies of the series set 100-200 years after ROTJ. Right now, he has no room to move.
The most interesting part of that pathetic interview was the discussion afterwards, without the phantom editor, about Memento. That the England dvd release will have an easter egg that you can watch it in chronological order.
"he wants the kids involved so they stick through all 3 new movies and hopefully watch the other 3."
Don't forget that Star Wars movies = release of some really cool toys. Go to your local Toys R Us and see what companies such as LEgo are doing with Star Wars. It's pretty impressive.
I have no doubt that Lucas had kids in mind when he made Jar Jar. He even said so in this month's Issue of Maxim.
Is this a bad thing? I agree that Star Wars would be more interesting if it were geared more towards the adult world, but the kids spend more money on it after the fact. The truth is that we can fully expect more kiddie stuff as Star Wars trickles out. Look at the preview for AotC. Anybody catch the flying R2D2 scene?
There is some hope, though. Older people are buying more video games these days. It's possible we'll see Star Wars tuned more to the adult audience in the next couple of movies, because now the older people have a reason to buy Star Wars merchandise.
At least that's what I'm hoping for. I'm not holding my breath, though. When I see AotC, I fully expect to see some silly moments that'll make the kids cheer. The best I can do is try to enjoy it. I know I thought the Ewoks were cool when I was 6.
"Derp de derp."
asl?
test message, plz ignore.
I think Jar Jar should be ground into pod racer fuel in the next episode
Haven't you heard?
Jar-Jar becomes Boba Fett in Ep2
I'd suggest you get off your 'high and mighty' spiel and actually read some of the words of the Anonymous Cowards whom you can't be bothered with.
While one of the responses may have been plain flamebait, the other one (the first one) has a good point.
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This post has been rot13'd for your protection
Roger That!
http://www.eveeieyhfgfcdoosammgwsnboivvbsczxlzgab
Seriously. It was just a part of the story, that was it. If you want to write a better series go for it.
Flame away!
Except for the fact that the #2 bad guy in the books and the one of the biggest turncoats in Middle Earth history is a wizard named Saruman the *WHITE*....
While Gandalf was known throughout most of his like as Gandalf the *GRAY*.
I realized the Phantom Menace was a piece of crap before someone pointed out Lucas' racist undertones. The white guys are beautiful and heroic. The slavetraders talk like aye-rabs. The evil trade federation talk like asians. The comic relief is provided by a neeeeeeeeeeeeegro. And beautiful Princess Amadalia Panda is Israli Army Pin-up Girl Natalie Portman. But Lucas pretends in the TIME interview he's exploring the line between dictatorship and democracy? Right, georgy porgey puddingly pie, 8 million pepsi cips didn't sell and he couldn't work out why.
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How about:-
1) cutting Tom Bombadil & the Barrow Wights
2) Aragorn "Just happening to find" 3 Hobbit sized swords to get past 1) on Weathertop
3) The "Cave Troll" in Moria - we've got a CGI budget & we're going to use it - or a blatent steal of "Harry Potter" either way superfluous & over-long.
4) The ending, Tolkien wrote a fine ending which they in their "infinite" wisdom decided to re-write so every one of the Fellowship could say goodbye to Frodo before he left - the new ending was lame, killed the meaning of the film and was actually longer than the original - please explain.
I walked out of the movie fuming. I could have accepted cuts because there's a lot going on in the book but not swingeing cuts so the director could masturbate with CGI & rewrite Tolkiens ending.
So... a spyware free version of kazaa...
interview with the phantom editor...
All in the same day?!
muahahahah!
This is wonderful. I did not know that there was a Phantom Menace 1.1. I'm glad there is.
I would like to think that legal barriers will not crop up to prevent more of this in the future.
Rum, Sodomy and the Lash
..." James pleaded, his voice hoarse with barely-
..." It was too much, he couldn't hold
... this *droplet* I've been given, and I want it *now*!"
... He shook
..." Hetfield growled. He drew his sword and just ran towards Lars, blade extended, looking for all the
..."
... can I ask you a question?" he finally
...
...
... are you?"
... I wish he's stop
... *his* Jason was
... no, *making
... He shivered with sudden
...? Then, it dawned on him. "Oh, about the
... Kirk told me he ...
by Armelle Amaya
Captain James Alan Hetfield stood on the bridge of his
ship, the Defiant. The Caribbean sun burned high in the clear blue sky, highlighting his white-blonde hair. The
sea was calm and blue, surpassed in blueness only by James' eyes, and his men were exceptionally good-
humoured today.
After making sure his crew could manage without him for a few hours, he walked towards his cabin, whistling in
anticipation of the one thing that would make this day more perfect than it already was.
He sneaked into his cabin, silently closing the door, and just stood there watching his cabin boy straighten
the sheets on their bed. "That's just gonna get messy again, you know," he grinned.
Kirk whirled around, startled, and clutched his chest.
"Fuck, James, don't fucking *do* that! You took ten years off my life."
"Sorry," James apologised, not looking very sorry at all. He was, in fact, grinning widely, letting Kirk
know exactly how these sheets were going to get messy.
Kirk rolled his eyes. "You're insatiable."
James strode towards the bed, scooped up Kirk and dropped him in it. "Shut up, boy," he growled
playfully, quickly dishevelling Kirk of the few clothes he was wearing. "I bought you, I own you. Now earn your
keep."
With that, he lay down on the bed, arms folded behind his head, making it very clear that he wasn't planning
on doing anything really strenuous that day.
Kirk's eyes lit up; it was only rarely that his lover allowed him to take the upper hand in their lovemaking.
He took a deep breath, determined to make this last as long as he could, to make it count.
Slowly, deliberately, he peeled James' shirt off, then neatly folded it and placed it on the chair next to the
bed. James watched him, amused, as Kirk repeated the ritual with his trousers, leaving him completely
uncovered.
An evil grin crossed his face as he loomed over James Hetfield, aka 'The Mighty Hetfield'. His lover, his
owner, the other half of his soul, whose body he knew better than his own, and he knew exactly how to make
this wild, powerful man beg for mercy.
Kirk started by attacking James' nipple, first licking it gently, then using his teeth, biting it until it was
hard as a pebble, and James was making incoherent sounds of pleasure. The other nipple received the same
treatment, and by that time James was moaning outright.
"Like that, huh?" Kirk smiled, looking into his lover's blue, dilated eyes. He loved it when James got like
this, aroused by his touch, *his* touch, all his.
"Come here and I'll show you exactly how much I like that," James drawled, his mouth lifting up in a lazy
grin. Kirk eagerly complied and let his face hover about an inch above James' for a few seconds before
lightly brushing his lips across his lover's. James deepened the kiss, not taking control but just slowly
delving into the heat of Kirk's mouth, and Kirk was only too happy to oblige and return the favour.
When they finally had to come up for air, Kirk whispered, breathlessly: "Now, where was I?" and moved
down James' body again, seeking out more sensitive spots, both old, familiar ones and ones he didn't know
about yet. Before long, the most feared pirate captain that ever sailed the seven seas was squirming under his
hands. He lived for moments like these.
"Kirk
contained lust.
"Say 'please'," Kirk demanded, pinning James' arms to
the bed.
"Kirk," James tried to threaten, but Kirk would have
none of it.
"Say 'please'," he insisted.
"Please?" James gave in.
"Good boy." Kirk took pity on his lover and slowly moved inside him, while James threw his head back and
let out a deep moan.
Kirk took the open invitation and gently bit his lover's neck, following up the bite with soft, wet
flicks of his tongue. James moaned deeply, causing Kirk to grin against him neck.
James moaned again, nearly growling, and Kirk shivered with barely contained desire. Slowly, teasingly, he
pulled almost all the way out, then slid back in again, filling his lover deeper than before.
"Oooohhhh, fuck!" James shouted. "More, please, Kirk more, I love you
still anymore and plunged deep into his lover, setting a slow, torturous rhythm. It was a long time before
they both came.
Afterwards they lay together, entangled in the bed sheets, sweating from the labour and the heat; and
all was well with the world.
Meanwhile, just behind the horizon, another captain was having a slightly less perfect day. Jason Newsted,
captain of the Valiant, had a pounding headache. Today had not gone very well.
His men were on the verge of mutiny because of the long time without shore leave and it had taken all his
authority to avoid an actual uprising. He wouldn't be able to keep them obedient for long, though, not with
the drink water supply down to only one barrel for the whole ship. And on top of all that there was -
"Captain Newsted!" A shrill female voice cut the air, making several of his most hardened men wince.
Jason groaned inwardly. Why the fuck had he ever agreed to transport this spoiled aristocratic girl to her
intended husband in Brazil? He was a trade captain, dammit, not an escort service!
"Yes, m'lady?" He forced himself to smile and be polite. After all, Monsier d'Axl was one of the most
influential businessmen in Europe, even if his daughter Rose was a first-class bitch.
"Captain Newsted, my father did not pay you handsomely so that I would have to go without washing! I demand
more water than this
Suddenly, the headache became a good thing, because without it he'd surely burst out laughing at the
of outrage on the young woman's face. "Miss d'Axl," he explained as calmly as he could, "We have very little
drinking water left. You've already been issued three times what the men get, so until we've stocked up
you'll have to either wash with salt water, or not at
all."
The woman opened her mouth, clearly outraged, but
before she could utter another word he interrupted her.
"Look, why don't we discuss this matter further in my cabin? I'm sure you'd be more comfortable discussing
your personal hygiene without the whole ship listening on." Damn, he was going to pay for that remark,
but the muffled snickers all around him were worth it. This was
one subject where his crew was still behind him.
As the 'lady' hmmpf-ed and strode towards the captain's
cabin, nose high in the air, Jason turned to his second-in-command. "Ulrich, set course for the nearest
island, as fast as you can. And keep an eye out for pirates. I think the Defiant was last seen in this
area."
The little Dane saluted and started to rattle off orders as his captain trudged after his bane. Lars
shook his head in sympathy. This was definitely their worst journey ever.
Little did he know it was about to get worse.
A loud pounding noise brought James and Kirk from their sex-induced haze. At James' growl the door opened to
reveal a widely-grinning man.
"Ship comin' our way, cap'n. Looks like it's real loaded." The man didn't blink an eye at the sight of
the captain and his 'personal slave' in bed together. It was just one of those things that made up life as
usual aboard the Defiant.
James sighed, reluctant to stop being a lover and start being a fighter again. "I'll be right out," he told the
messenger, who nodded and promptly returned to the deck. James swung his long legs out of the bed and got
to his feet. After getting dressed, he told Kirk to stay in the cabin while they were fighting and went
outside to lead his men to yet another victory.
Lars was the first on the Valiant to catch sight of the black pirate flag near the horizon. "Sit!" he yelled,
"That's all we fucking needed. Damn, damn, *damn*!" Adding a few curses in Danish for good measure, he
quickly ran to the captain's cabin.
He could hear the 'damsel', as the crew had taken to calling her, yelling and screaming within paces from
the solid door. Lars grimaced. If this was what ladies were like, he'd rather stick with prostitutes and bar
girls, thank you.
He pounded on the door before opening it, not waiting for answer first. The bad news must've been apparent on
his face, because Jason took one look at him and sighed.
"Let me guess: the Defiant."
Lars nodded.
"Any chance it's any other pirate?"
"You know any other pirate that sails under a black,
snake-adorned flag?"
Jason sighed again. "Stay in here," he told the 'Lady'
and her chaperone. Once on deck, he ordered one of his
men to guard the door to his cabin and to stay there no
matter what.
"Hey," Lars nudged his friend in the side. "Don't look
so worried. It's just a pirate. We've encountered those before."
"Yeah, but this is *Hetfield*! Shit, they don't call him 'The Mighty" for nothing, you know. And the worst
thing is that now we'll have to be around *her* for even longer."
Lars chuckled at that last one. "Stop worrying. We'll make it. We're a great team."
Yeah, they were a great team alright. If only Lars realised how Jason truly felt about him
his head. He had pirates to worry about, he didn't have the time to stand there mooning about his friend.
"Is there any way we can outrun them?"
Lars shook his head. "No. No ship on earth is faster
than the Defiant."
"And the army that can defeat James Hetfield hasn't been formed yet," Jason added. "Well, he's not gonna
get us that easy," he frowned, sounding determined, and started to give out orders.
The fight was long and vicious, lasting well into the
afternoon. In the end, only Jason and Lars were still standing, back to back, surrounded by the pirates.
Suddenly the crowd parted to let a tall, blonde man pass.
"Mr Hetfield, I assume?" Lars grinned at the pirate captain striding towards him. Jason cast a worried
glance over Lars' shoulder, but figured Lars could more than take care of himself.
"You assume correctly. And you are?"
"Lars Ulrich; I'm the one that's gonna kick your ass."
Lars grinned broadly.
Hetfield chuckled in amusement. "You? Kick *my* ass? What're you gonna do, jump up and bit me in the balls?"
Lars shrugged quasi-careless. "That could work," he said, right before he proceeded to do just that. Jason
turned around to see the feared pirate bend over in pain, and snickered.
"You
world like a charging bull. Lars calmly stepped aside, with Jason following suit, and James stumbled into the
crowd, almost killing a few of his own men.
Hetfield turned around, now facing Jason, and attacked again, this time displaying all the skill that had made
him so notorious. All Jason could do was parry the strikes; there was no way he could get a blow in on
James Hetfield.
It was only a matter of minutes before the fight was over and Jason was lying on the ground with a sword at
his throat. He looked up into Hetfield's eyes, refusing to back down. Time stood still for a few heartbeats
while two strong wills battled. Then the sword was removed, and Hetfield let Jason get up.
"Take those two to my cabin, and guard them," he
ordered. "And don't forget to disarm them!"
"Hey Hammett! Company!"
Grumbling, Kirk dragged himself over to the door. "What?" he snarled.
"Sorry man, captain's orders. These two are to stay here 'till he gets back. He's checking out the loot."
"Yeah, yeah, let 'em in. You mind if I get dressed?" he
asked the two men, who were entering the cabin hesitantly.
The taller one blushed furiously at the sight of Kirk's naked body, and even more deeply when he caught sight
of the disarrayed bed. When the guy saw Kirk's tattoos,
the flames on his hips, which were symbols of tribe, and the letters arching over his stomach,
reading 'Property of J.A. Hetfield', he turned so red Kirk was afraid he was going to burst a vein.
"Who are you two, anyway?" he asked, quickly donning a lose pair of trousers and roughly straightening the
covers of the bed. "Oh and have a seat, please." He gestured towards some chairs and settled on the bed
himself, legs crossed.
"Jason Newsted, captain of the Valiant."
"Lars Ulrich, first mate." He had an odd accent, Kirk noted. Considering the name, he was probably
Scandinavian or something. Kirk let his eyes rake over the shorter man's body. Not bad, he decided, short but
muscled. Nice eyes. And completely oblivious to the cause of his captain's embarrassment.
"Kirk Hammett, pleasure slave," he grinned, delighting in the returning blush on Newsted's face. Gods, but
this guy was easy to tease. He hoped James wouldn't return for a while yet, so he could have some more fun
with them. "So, can I get you gentlemen anything? A drink, something to eat, anything?"
"No thank you," Ulrich declined. Newsted continued to look uncomfortable and seemed rather relieved when
James stormed in a few moments later, looking like he wanted to strangle someone. Kirk frowned; normally his
lover was in a good mood after a victory.
"Kirk, take the shorty here and make yourselves scarce for a while. I need to talk business with captain
"Newsted," Kirk provided, helpfully.
"... with captain Newsted here."
"Yes, sir," Kirk saluted. He gestured for Ulrich to
step through the door. "After you, kind sir."
After the door shut behind them, there was an awkward silence as both of them tried to think of something to
say. Then Kirk went over to the rail and hauled himself on it, crossing his legs. There was another awkward
silence as Lars tried to think of something to think.
"So, um
mustered.
"Sure, go ahead."
"How come you seem so happy?"
Kirk lifted his eyebrows. Of all the questions he'd been expecting, this was definitely not one. "What do
you mean?"
"Well, it's almost like you enjoy being Hetfield's
pleasure slave," Lars explained, blushing a little at the last few words.
Kirk snickered. "Gee, whatever gave you that idea?
Look, Mr Ulrich -"
"Lars," Lars interrupted.
"Lars," Kirk smiled, and the sun suddenly seemed to burn a lot brighter. "James would set me free the
second I'd ask him. I want to stay with him, just like I wanted to have this tattoo, and like I want to sleep
with him. Not because he makes me, but because I want
to. Because I love him."
Lars frowned. "Love cannot exist between men. And
intercourse between to members of the same gender is a
sin."
Kirk shrugged. "It's not a sin to *my* gods. So,
anyway," he abruptly changed the subject. "What
happened back on your ship that made James so angry?"
"I dunno. I mean he was a bit pissed when I bit him,
but -"
"You bit him?" Kirk interrupted.
"Um, yeah." Lars blushed vaguely and then gave Kirk a
quick report of the fight, making the slave giggle
hysterically.
"Oh gods," he panted, "Poor James. You're a madman,
Uli."
"Thanks," Lars grinned. "But I don't think that's what
made him angry. I have the feeling he's had the
pleasure of meeting Miss d'Axl."
"So," Hetfield said, pulling up a chair. "Let's talk
business." Jason looked up, surprised. Business? "I
want to make you an offer. Normally, I'd just take your
cargo and let you on your way. However, I'm willing to
let you go, *with* your cargo, on one condition. That
'lady', Miss D'Axl, I want to keep her."
Jason frowned in confusion. What would Hetfield want with her, when he had Kirk? Then he noticed the red,
hand-shaped mark on the other's cheek, and grinned inwardly. Apparently the pirate had had encountered the
lady's temper. "What would you do with her?"
"Well, I thought Kirk could use some help with his
duties as a cabin boy, so he'd be free to fulfil his
other duties."
The image of the damsel cleaning up the pirate's mess was so appealing Jason simply forgot to blush at the
reference to the pleasure slave. It was tempting, very tempting. He could get back at her *and* keep his
cargo. He sighed deeply.
"Much as I'd like to, I can't. I gave my word I'd
protect her. Besides, I'd be ruined; her father is the most influential businessman in Europe. If I'd leave
his daughter with a pirate, I may as well become one myself."
"Actually," Hetfield said, his voice thoughtful. "Maybe
you should. I could use a second ship."
Jason stared at him in shock. Was the man really saying what he thought he was saying? He couldn't be. Hetfield
was notorious for being a loner; the only pirate of his calibre who didn't use multiple ships to expand his
power and influence. Why would he suddenly ask a total
stranger to be his second in command?
"Because you're the first one I want to be my adjunct," Hetfield said in answer to the question that was clear
on Jason's face. "You're the best sword fighter I've ever encountered, you're brave, a good captain, and
true to your word, like you just demonstrated. And,
well, I like you."
"What about my men?" Jason wanted to know.
"They can stay under your command, if they want to.
Those who don't will be brought to the nearest trade
harbour."
He considered Hetfield's words for a few moments. It was certainly tempting, and not just because of the
money - though that certainly played a big role. No,
there was also the fact that he wouldn't have to suck up to bastards like Mr d'Axl anymore; nor would he have
to be polite to their daughters. And maybe, hopefully, being around Kirk would open Lars' mind to the idea of
a relationship with a man. Lars
"I need to think about this," he told Hetfield. "And
talk about it with my First Mate."
The pirate arched an eyebrow. "You discuss things like
this with a subordinate?"
"He's not just my subordinate," Jason explained. "He's
my friend."
Lars looked up as the door to the cabin opened and
Jason came out, looking immersed in thought. As he
walked up to his friend he heard Hetfield order one of
his men to take the two of them back to the ship and
organise guards to be on the Valiant for the night.
He frowned. What did the pirate want from them that he
didn't already have? He opened his mouth to ask Jason,
but the latter shook his head. "Not now," he said
cryptically.
As soon as they were inside Jason's cabin, Lars
demanded to know what was going on. After Jason told
him briefly what they'd been offered, he was silent for
a moment. "So, are you going to do it?" he asked,
hesitently.
"Maybe
"Maybe. Only if you will."
"I will if you will," Jason smiled.
"Then I guess we will," Lars grinned, and they both
burst out in laughter at the idiocy of their
conversation.
Six Months Later
----------------
Kirk was lying on the deck of the Defiant, basking in
the sun, waiting for his lover to return. James was on
the Valiant, talking to Jason and Lars about their
latest fight. Both ships were lying in the bay of
Sandman Island, the pirates' home base.
"Hey, Quirk, is this what you do all day while the rest
of us are risking our lives?" He opened his eyes and
saw Lars standing over him. He grinned at the Dane and
got up.
"Hey, I have to keep up my tan, don't I? So, what're
you doing here? Where's James and Jason?"
Lars rolled his eyes. "Jase insisted that I have my arm
seen to."
Kirk frowned at his friend. "Did you get hurt?"
"It's just a scratch; Jason's overreacting," Lars told
him, but followed him to the cabin nevertheless.
"C'me here, let me see this 'scratch'," Kirk ordered.
Lars rolled up his left sleeve, revealing a wound,
nothing serious, but deeper than a 'scratch'. "Jason
was absolutely right. This needs to be disinfected or
it could be worse."
Lars muttered something intelligible.
"What?" Kirk inquired.
"Nothing," Lars sighed. "It's just
treating like a little kid. I may be short, but I'm not
weak."
"He knows that," Kirk laughed. "He's just worried about
you Lars. We all worry about the people we care about.
Hell, you should see me with James sometimes; I'm worse
than Jase is with you and no one would call James
weak."
"Yeah, but you're lovers, that's different," Lars
insisted. Kirk just looked at him oddly. "What?" Lars
asked, confused.
Kirk laughed, shaking his head. "Gods, you're either
really dense, or really in denial. You really mean to
tell me you don't know that Jason is head over heels in
love with you?"
"*Jason*?!?" Lars exclaimed, incredulously. "No way!"
"Way. And I, for one, think you should take this
opportunity. Look, Lars, true love is a rare thing.
Don't let it slip through your fingers."
Lars shook his head, trying to clear his thoughts, and
stood, abruptly. "I need to clear my head," he told
Kirk, and exited the cabin without waiting for an
answer.
Lars leaned over the rail, staring off into the sea,
not really seeing anything. Jason
in love with him? He couldn't believe it, but if
anyone'd know it would be Kirk. And just when had he
started to think of Jason as 'his', anyway?
He moaned quietly. How the hell was he supposed to
handle this? Should he tell Jason that he knew? If he
did, should he make it clear that he didn't feel the
same way? Was he *sure* he didn't feel the same way?
Lars tried to imagine having sex with
love* with Jason. Would it hurt? Kirk sure seemed to
enjoy it, and he'd seen enough glimpses of the two
lovers to know that the roles were reversed every now
and then, too. He couldn't picture James Hetfield
voluntarily doing anything really painful.
Still, would *he* like *Jason* to do that to *him*?
Would he like to do it to Jason? He closed his eyes,
calling up his friend's face and imagined kissing him,
slipping his tongue between those lips, feeling those
strong arms around him
lust.
Fuck, why had it taken him so long to get a clue? He'd
had a kind, generous, loving man right beside him for
years, and he'd never known. "I'm an idiot," he mumbled
to himself.
"Yes, you are," a deep voice came from behind him,
frightening the hell outta him. He turned on his heels
to see James, grinning at the expression on Lars' face.
"What were you so lost in thought about?"
"Nothing. Everything. Ask Kirk, and tell him thanks
from me," Lars rushed out as he ran towards the other
end of the ship, where a small rowboat was waiting to
take him back to the Valiant.
After a few endless minutes, he was finally aboard his
ship, where Jason was waiting for him. "What'd Kirk
say?"
"Huh?" Lars frowned, momentarily confused. How did
Jason know
arm. It's fine, he cleaned it and put a bandage on it
to keep it from infecting. Look, Jase, can I talk to
you in private?"
"Um, yeah, sure, I guess," Jason answered, sounding
bewildered. He followed Lars to the cabin.
Once inside, Lars turned to face Jason, and took a deep
breath. "Listen,
hethinksyou'reinlovewithme." The last part came out in
one bif rush.
Jason swore. "Damn Hammett, why can't he ever mind his
own business?"
"So, it's true?" Lars insisted.
"Yeah, it's true," Jason looked down, not meeting Lars'
eyes.
"Why didn't you ever tell me?" Lars' tone was soft,
sweet. It gave Jason the courage to lift his head and
gaze into his friend's eyes, almost getting lost in the
emerald depths.
"Because I was sure you weren't interested in men."
"Idiot," Lars chided softly, stepping closer to Jason
until he was pressed against the taller body. "We
could've had so much longer."
Jason leaned down and pressed his lips to Lars' own.
"No regrets," he said. "Let's just make up for all
those years, okay?"
Lars grinned against Jason's lips. "Sound like a plan."
James looked after the Dane, bewildered. What the hell
was that all about? He went to his cabin, where Kirk
was putting away his medical equipment. "What did you
do to Lars?" he asked. "He was acting really weird."
Kirk smiled secretively. "Oh, nothing. I just made him
see what was right in front of him."
James regarded his lover sternly. "Have you been
playing matchmaker again?" A semi-innocent whistle was
his only answer. He sighed. "Well, he said to thank
you, so I guess you've been successful." He shook his
head in mock tolerance. "Though I really wish you'd
stay out of people's personal lives."
"I just can't help it, I want *everyone* to be as happy
as you're making me." James moved forward and wrapped
his lover up in his arms.
"I love you too," he whispered in Kirk's ear. Kirk just
smiled and lifted his head for a kiss.
Meanwhile, on an island not that far away, the former
Lady Rose d'Axl was cleaning out a pig's stall. She was
not happy. For almost six months now, she'd been the
slave of an old native woman, forced to live in
primitive circumstances and do hard labour. "I hate my
life," she grunted. "God, I wish the old wench would
just drop dead.
The 'old wench' was, at that very moment, talking to
her pig. "Don't worry, Rosie's just cleaning you crib.
She's young, she can do it, unlike poor old me. Wasn't
it *so* sweet of my Kirky to give his momma a present
like that?"
My nephews (ages 10 and 12 at the time of Episode I release) loved Jar Jar Binks. I know the character made the movie unpalatable for many adults, but for what it's worth, lots of kids were happy with it.
Personally, I really don't feel one way or the other about Jar Jar.
Read my sig if you like, but I'll never see yours, thanks to Discussions, Viewing, Disable sigs...
Could Episode 3 make Jar Jar essential and unforgetable?
what will the phantom editor do then.
none
Just to clarify: I don't think the voice of Foghorn Leghorn was intended to parody a particular living or dead politician.
From some random website I found through Google
Foghorn Leghorn - Large, white windbag of a rooster seen in a number of Warner Brother cartoons over the years. Foghorn Leghorn (inspired by Kenny Delmar's Senator Beauregard Claghorn from Bighorn character, a Deep South politician from THE FRED ALLEN SHOW on radio) premiered in the Warner's animated feature Walky Talky Hawky (1946). His popular catchphrases are "I say, I say there!", "Pay attention, boy!" and "Now listen here!" In his book That's Not all Folks (Warner Books, 1988) Mel Blanc, the voice of this boisterous loudmouth southern rooster, relayed a confusion that arose about the initial inspiration for the voice of Foghorn Leghorn. "Delmar claimed he based the voice not on my (Mel Blanc) character's, but on that of a Texas rancher he'd once hitched a ride from. Bob McKimson claimed Foghorn's voice was derived not from Senator Claghorn's but from someone on another old-time radio program, BLUE MONDAY JAMBOREE. And I claim I first heard the accent at a 1928 vaudeville show at San Francisco's Pantages Theater when I was twenty. As I recall it, in one of the skits an actor played a clownish hard-of-hearing southern sheriff."
That is, Foghorn Leghorn's voice was based on some vaudeville act, and his name seems to have been derived from a *fictional* senator, the character of which appeared on the Fred Allen Show, whose accent may have been similar.
At last someone did something. All those ooppss... gilging..yahooing...tripping over own legs...stealing apples, useles brrrring, droid pumping trough engine,and other crup together with Jar Jar Binks was pothetic. Remeber episode 4. Thats the only episode Lucas directed and original movie was great. Now mr Lucas relised new edition. Guess what he added. oppses..gigles.. biker pumps in some monste, someone steps in shit. Moronic small things that are distroing a good movie. Star War always was a serious movie. Lucas transformed into kiddy pop culture. Glad someone did something.
The whole idea of making Anakin "badass" defeats the purpose of the story. It is often times that the highly intelligent, sensitive, and loving (parting with his mother, etc) succumb to the weaknesses of evil, usual provoked by a sense of fear, then arrogance, anger, and hatred (and, if you remember Yoda, the last in the list is suffering - possibly driven by an internal conflict). It is seldom that a young bully becomes anything more than a sloppy reject in the end, not to mention that it defeats the purpose of character development. His ultimate reign of terror (possibly something we'll see in EP3, and something that most certainly occurs between EP3 and ANH) imposed by Anakin's is his shield of defence from imagined fear. Badass == lame.
are humorless twits who take themselves all too seriously and favor Java because they do not understand how to use C++ correctly.
I'm an Eastern European Jew and I have a number of mixed Asian (Korean, Japanese, Chinese, and Cambodian) friends, and none of us percieved or interpreted any of the characters as racist statements made by Lucas. In fact, it didn't even occur to us until we read a post much like this one on some stupid message board a year ago.
:/. And yes, Ahmed Best is African American (he consented, didn't he? What about Samuel Jackson?). This racist garbage must be a result of political correctness where being human raises eyebrows.
Racist? Give me a break.
PS: strange how Watto is a racist statement against Jews and Natalie Portman is a glorification of them.
As far as your giving Lucas the benefit of the doubt is concerned, you're a better person than me. Nonetheless, I do think he was being unconsciously conservative to the point of racism (and I should mention that most of this derives from David Brin's comments on Star Wars):
========================================
Death will come, and will have your eyes
-- Pavese
I don't know if this is supposed to be a troll or not, but both Mp3 and OGG support those features.
autopr0n is like, down and stuff.
Sorry for everyone's mispelled names...
Kurt: This is Studio 360, at my desk is the film editor Doby Dorn and we're talking about all kinds of editing. Millions of "Star Wars" fans were lukewarm about the 1999 prequel "The Phantom Menace". But one disappointed fan actually did something about it. He calls himself the Phantom Editor. And with his personal computer he entirely recut the movie on video and started giving it away. This new phantom edit has become a global phenomenon thanks to the Internet and we invited him to speak publicly for the first time about why he did what he did.
[Starwars soundtrack]
PhantomEditor: The very first day that Phantom Menance premiered that...that afternoon I was thinking "Boy this movie needs a re-edit." I don't know, that afternoon I went up there sat next to a few people who had saw it when they were kidding about bringing their little kid in to see it. I thought "Wow this is really cool." And then the movie started and that sorta went right out the window.
[Jar-Jar-Binks]
PhantomEditor: On the screen there was so much extra material on there that I thought if they could remove some of this extra stuff THAT would actually make a better film. It's not that George Lucas didn't have the technology to do what he wanted to do, it's that he did. And somehow the movie became more about the technology then the storytelling aspect of it. The things that I...I was concerned with... uh... in my edit were the story redundancy, the over-abundance of Jar-Jar antics that didn't seem to carry the story forward, and the presentation of Jake Lloyd as Anakin Skywalker.
[Anikin: "You mean I get to come with you in your staaarshiiip?"]
PhantomEditor: He ends up being the evil character Darth Vader in the other "Star Wars" movies and the actions don't really seem reflective of that character. The blowing up of the droid control ship within the "Phantom Menace" was actually done as a... you know... an accident, where he hit the button and physically he says the word "Oops" at the end of it during the explosion.
[Anikin: "oops"]
PhantomEditor: Instead of letting him be heroic he ends up being a fumbling goof. All the happy accidents are now diminished.
PhantomEditor: Uh... throughout the whole movie from that battle sequence on Anikan's actions are now motivated by his heroic character. There are no oops's, there are none of the yippee's either...
[Anikan: "yippppeee!"]
PhantomEditor: There's an excessive amount of Jar-Jar antics, and what I mean by that, is the little examples which are almost a showpiece for the ILM special effects... where it takes you out of the story lets him participate in some little antic, and then you have to fight to get back into the story again. By removing alot of those things, I am not taking away from the story, I'm actually helping it by keeping people involved.
[Jar-Jar]
PhantomEditor: Initially when I did this it was for the audience of me and it really started out pretty harmless. The offering of a few copies to friends, who of course had friends who worked somewhere else who wanted to see it, and it began to get talked about. I mean, there was a point where I was getting over 200 emails a day. The first time I got one from New Zealand, that's what really scared the hell out of me, because I'm like "How did you see this?"
[Music swell]
PhantomEditor: First I remained anonymous because I guess that's originally what I wanted to do. You know, it was really a joke between friends, and I'm sure alot of those people knew who I was anyway. But when it got really huge like that it became really overwhelming for somebody like me who had edited this on a low end computer sitting on a $40 computer stand in my apartment. And then I didn't know the legal terms of it. All I knew is that I felt really safe because I wasn't making any profit off of that, but it was becoming aware to me that other people out there were.
[Deathstar music]
PhantomEditor: Initially George Lucas had said in public at the MTV awards that he did want to see it. But then later they put out a press statement that he would not ever watch it. Actually, I do think he should watch it. I just think that those people are making movies with their wallets. And might need a little kick in the butt from somebody like me who is completely at the other end of the scale which is similar to the message which is in the "Star Wars" films, that the underdog, the Luke Skywalker character overpowers the Empire.
[Music swell]
Kurt: Mike J. Nickels is the phantom editor and our story was produced by Michael May. Dody, you know the phantom editor I understand?
Dody: Yeah I've met him a couple times, and I have a copy of the "Phantom Edit". Is that what it's called?
Kurt: That's what it's called yeah.
Dody: [Laugh] and uhh, but I've never watched it.
Kurt: What do you think of... of what he's done? I mean the idea of... of a mere civilian taking a piece of, you know, zillion dollar entertainment and... and by his lights improving it?
Dody: Well, uhm, I think if it's an irrepressable urge.. uh.. uh.. there's no reason why somebody should stop doing something that's an irrepressable urge. I mean why? Why should he, I mean, he's not try to, as he said, not try to make any profit from it. Uh... I understand the irritation of the person who did make it. I... I understand it. But I don't have an answer for that. I don't really have an answer for whether he... I mean, what are the options? Could they come and put him in jail for having done that? I mean, there are over... over time there are examples of.. of other films... I think it's "Once Upon a Time in America" that had the European version where the time structure was all over the place, and then they made an American version that was... much uhm.. I mean obviously these were the people who owned the film, but I doubt seriously if it was the film-maker who wanted it to completely rearrange the time and made it much shorter. And people were critical of it. So I think when something like that is done that it opens... that its a forum for discussion.
Kurt: I understand that "Momento" in a European DVD form was in risk, or is going to be reorganized entirely, is that true?
Dody: Not exactly, uhm... the... I think it's the DVD release in England has an easter egg on it where you can play the film in forward chronology and Chris and I actually have never put the film in forward chronology. So while we were working on "Insomnia" we rented [laugh] the film, and digitized it, and put it in forward chronology. And we were so shocked by the change in how you experience the film; it was a completely different film. Uhm.. the character of.. of Lenard Shelby was now a really bad guy and in the structure that is Chris's design, he is someone who is avenging his wife's horrible murder. So he is a sympathetic character all the way through. And part of the purpose of that in telling the story that Chris wanted to tell is that it is an anti-revenge revenge tale. Because you spend the whole film thinking this is a good guy that we have empathy with who is going to avenge his wife's murder and at the end, or the middle of the story you realize, oh, maybe he is just a psycho.
Dody: And then it makes you question, I'd like to think it makes you question, the whole idea of revenge. Ah... because it's suddenly your perspective has shifted.
Kurt: And when you re-edited it as technology allows us to do and put it in the normal straight forward fasion, it's like you turn a beautiful, amazing, oragami construction into a... just a piece of paper.
Dody: Right, exactly, and it felt suddenly just like a... uh... uh... low rent, you know, film noir.
Kurt: Dody Dorn, thank you very much for joining me today in Studio 360.
Dody: Been alot of fun.
Kurt: Starting next month, you can see Dody Dorn's work in the new movie by Christopher Noland "Insomnia". It stars, Al Pacino, Hillary Swank, and Robert Williams. For more information about Dody Dorn, or about anything else you've heard on our program, visit our website, studio360.org.
Kurt: Studio 360 is produced by WNYC along with PRI, public radio international. The production team includes, Julie Berstein, Cary Hillman, Peter Clowny, Jocelyn Gonzolas, Steve Nelson, Michelle Speagle, Lisal Muhas, Andy Lancet, Lou Alcasky, Micheal Rayfield. The music is by David Vantiegams. I'm Kurt Anderson, and I do hope you'll join us next week in Studio 360.
Announcer: Studio 360 is co-produced by WNYC radio and public radio international, and is supported by the Corporation for Public Broadcasting, The National Endowment for the Arts, the Tiffany and Company Foundation, and the Horith W. Goldsmith Foundation.
[PRI sound]
It appears Ockham lost his razor and grew a beard.
If only the terrorists had called it 'opperation jar jar' or something, to make jar jar 'emotionaly resonate' or whatever.
autopr0n is like, down and stuff.
Badass == lame.
Great. You stick with Lucas and his elfin little heroes. The rest of us will be watching The Phantom Edit, drinking beers, fucking chicks, smashing cars and otherwise having a good time.
I just watched 1.1. I think we should all send 10$ each to that guy so he can get himself dual 1Gig G4 Mac and redo it at maximum quality. (You can notice slowdowns when high action frames were rendered)Thats the way SW 1 should be in the first place. I was amaized how much you can change a movie just doing a cuts and taking out some of the voices. Still he missed one yahooooo....:))) (in racing scene when JarJar screms "here hi comes....yahoooo"). JarJar is now really serios. and Anaken is more serious. Movie looks much mode dynamic like old SW were. Amaizing job.!
Hey, just because jewish people have owned the actual land longer in recorded history means nothing. or that they had been living there a very long time until the ottoman empire came along, i think the expulsion of the jews during the ottoman empire was a good thing, the fact that it allowed the time when jewish people reclaimed their land from thousands of years before that they had no right to it, because the turkish empire had decried that right.
I completely agree that even though the ottoman empire (because they supported austrian in ww1) lost there land to the british, who, seeing the two varied populations (remember the jewish had been heavily emigrating BACK to israel there homeland from biblical times since 1880) seperated the land into two portions a palestinian and jewish part.
immediately after official british control in the situation the arab nations of jordan and egypt who controled the west bank and gaza strip respectively (remember palestein hasnt actually existed except for a very very very long time ago) they lost those areas, which allowed the israelis to recapture 85% of the land ceded the british in the defeat of the turks in ww1.
I beleive the genocide of the israeli jewish people should have succeded (since this was the well documented attempt by Jordan, Egypt, and Syria) we would not be having this problem, since there would be no palestien, israel would now be Jordan, and or Jordan, Syria, Egypt division. with no jewish people at all.
I mean if you look at the PLO (or PA) the flag is the same as jordans with the absence of a star, since PLO are actually a jordan faction that were left in israel, and the PLO's whole ideal was to destroy the israelis that were there.
I mean because they are dirty jews we can conveniently forget the fact that jewish and arabic peoples coexisted simultaniously from 1880 to 1946 in peace, and there was no "major" conflict between the two, until the jewish lobbied for an israeli government with the british at the end of ww1.
I cant forgive the stupid dirty jews for defending themselves when it was granted and then captureing strategicly important areas such as the gaza strip and the west bank. And i cant beleive these stupid jews even went so far as put forth a hand recently in being ready to accept the peace by ceding these two areas. Luckily the palestinians havent been swayed by the "peace process" which would allow them to live together in harmony, because they should destroy the jews, and the jews should die because they are illegal and have no right to live in the widely accepted relatively ancient homeland, i mean shit its not like they built jerusalem or anything lol.
If you don't vote, you don't matter, so don't waste your time telling me your opinion
Considering the Lord of the Rings trilogy is an allegory for the Christian mythos, you're pretty much saying that Christianity is racist as well. Light is symbolic for good, darkness for evil. I have yet to see a dark-skinned christian arguing for the opposite (dark = good, light = bad) because of the "racist undertones." And when you get into the third book, Saruman the WHITE turns out to be really bad (taking over the shire, etc.) so your argument doesn't really hold up there either.
Your actions on earth echo in eternity.
Sorry, but the one that sounds like a racist here is you , since you are saying black people look like Amphibian aliens from the swamps of Naboo.
Please get a grip.
- sigs are for wimps.
He's a 10 year old boy for Christ's sake
Isn't the whole point that he gets lured over to the Dark Side? If he was evil to begin with it would be kind of crap wouldn't it?
Summation 2
This is what Sam thinks about the body of a dark skinned Southron warrior who fought and died for Sauron:
I think that shows pretty clearly that Tolkien wasn't equating darkness of skin with evil. After all, plenty of fair skinned men fought for Sauron as well."Mind, as manifested by the capacity to make choices, is to some extent present in every electron." -Freeman Dyson
Eesa posters gwana troll?
...is that George Lucas is of course incredibly rich and famous, where this Phantom Editor guy is a nobody.
Call me when he makes something of his own.
"Information wants to be paid"
far from being amazed at lucas, i have to say that i'm pretty amazed at how hyper-sensitive you guys (and most of america) seem to be. this is kind of OT, since i'm not referring specifically to SW or JarJar, but these comments on the page.
when you have a specific agenda, you can generally find something to be angry about. going out of your way to create something that couldn't possibly be offensive to anyone leads to boring characters, and more importantly, a total void in the area of social commentary.
i'm not saying that a targeted assault can necessarily be explained away as social commentary, but i do think there is merit in reflecting reality rather than some sort of peaceful place where nobody's feelings are ever hurt.
how far would art in all its forms progress if we stopped anything offensive? and who gets to decide whether it's offensive -- you, me, or my reactionary catholic grandmother? or perhaps jerry falwell? where do you draw the line?
it seems to me that american culture is increasingly defined by what cannot be done, rather than what can.
Stupid moderators! I want to see a text transcript, too! (Couldn't find one on the site.)
It'd be nice to define a way to re-edit a film from DVD footage, such that you can redistribute the edit as simple "score" information. You just list the edit segments as references to timed slices of the original data. The resulting file would be tiny, and you're not sharing any copyrighted information. When you "play" the edit, the DVD player just skips around the source movie playing the edits in order.
More complicated editing techniques like the separation of audio and video tracks (to maintain music continuity for instance) could be implemented by having separate edit information for each. The player software must become a little smarter at this point though.
This mechanism could also be used to implement the "amateur commentaries" that Ebert talked about a little while back. You just include the commentary information in a separate file, which would be much smaller as you would have to provide only the actual commentary, not all the "dead air" between comments. The edit score would play the appropriate comment at the right time, with nice crossfading if you prefer.
Yes, you do have valid points. You shouldn't hammer them into everyone the way you are doing, but you do have valid points. Israel has a right to exist, but at the same time, the Palestinians have a right to live on certain sections of that land. A compromise needs to be reached, and that's what politics is all about. You have a thing about Israel having the right to that land. Sure, agreed, but since the Palestinians do not like what's happening, surely you don't disagree with the fact that they have a right to at least some say in the matter?
Amazingly I thought it was about the Phantom Edit of Episode I. As in the movie that came out a long time ago? All I have to whine about is people that don't read articles and then flame others....
Why didn't they make use of subtitles in this movie. It would have been just as effective in conveying peoples messages (it was used for most of the aliens in the original trilogy). In the original 3 movies the only accents you seemed to hear were british and american(with the brits being the bad guys i.e. the empire). Perhaps it seems that the movie was aimed at a younger audience, perhaps one that can't read subtitles indstead of anas an older one, and accents had to be used to differentiate one group from another.
Bring back the old version of slashdot.
Old Man and the Sea? UGH!!! I HATE that book!
So you're saying he goes from being Oliver Twist to Heinrich Himmler? That doesn't make a lot of sense.
The trade federation in The Phantom Menace was making fun of the Chinese government, not the Japanese.
-Mike_L
cause at least Lucas isults all people equally.
cu,
Lispy
Wow, the things people will do for a few Karma points! :-P
It's called an edit decision list and despite jmu1's wierd response, should be perfectly legal.
The studio's support or even permission should not be needed because the distributed file as CaseyB suggests would contain none of the original movie.
You would need to use DeCSS to make an unencrypted mpeg-2 file, but people who make EDLs and the tools to parse them need not be involved in that.
Video editing tools that parse standard format EDLs (Discreet's "edit" supports CMX, GVG & Sony formats) already exist, but tend to be the expensive ones. The cheap ones (I use Cinestream (EditDV) from discreet (used to be Radius, Digital Origin, Media 100)) only use proprietary formats.
The EDL parser would be fairly simple because it doesn't need to be a full-blown editor and deal with a bunch of files; it would only have one very long "daily" to work from. It might have to create new I frames if cuts occur on B or P frames. Much simpler than a full-blown editor like edit.
A tool to convert human-readable EDLs to CMX ones would enable people to watch a movie on a regular-ol' DVD player, make notes of the in & out point times & just type 'em into an email message to someone who knows how to run the re-processor.
Damn, this sounds like a fun project.
-M
I advise you to read Himmler's biography first before you open that hole in your face. It doesn't look like you know much at all about human behavior at all. It makes perfect sense.
:-/).
(Re: entry prior to this: wtf?? I don't think the feminists would be too happy
In my copy, I can't seem to watch the whole movie chonologically; I can only watch one scene at a time. The "feature" is simply that they present you a list of scenes in chronological order.
Did you just hit "play" and watch the whole thing?
Patrick Doyle
I mod down every jackass who puts his moderation policy in his sig. Oh, wait a sec....
"Elfin heroes", eh? Sounds like you don't like Tolkien. (I believe the term you were looking for was "dwarf-like"). Fucking chics, eh? Hmmmm. . It seems that a great deal of "Adults" need to mature to the level of children. How sad and tragic.
I am glad though, that they didn't throw in a token black character. They were dealing with small isolated populations. You likely wouldn't get someone with a really different skin color so it'd be a blatant "Don't hate us, here's your token minority" gesture. Now on the other hand, if they'd made (for instance) the wood elves dark (or the Rivendell ones) that would have made some sense because they were a seperate population. But it's unthinking knee-jerk PC gestures that stick out like a sore thumb.
Yes. Like having a black Vulcan in Star Trek: Voyager.
That that is is that that that that is not is not.
Well, I know winamp supports vbr. And OGG has vbr as part of the standard.
autopr0n is like, down and stuff.
That black guy only got the part because he was the best man for it!
You big racist!