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Caffeinated Beer Becomes a Reality
Cylar writes "CNN is reporting that Anheuser-Bush has developed a sweet, caffeinated beer they are dubbing B(E). Intended to compete with the trendy sweet concotions popular on the club scenes (such as Smirnoff Ice), it will contain caffeine, guarana, and ginseng." Not sure how I feel about ginseng in my brew, so I'll have to study this with a few cases.
Coffee is an acquired taste, so is beer, I guess one will have to learn to enjoy this beverage...
Trolling using another account since 2005.
In the immortal words of Homer Simpson...
Oh, yeah. Beer busts, beer blasts, keggers, stein hoists, AA meetings, beer night. It's wonderful, Marge. I've never felt so accepted in all my life. These people looked deep within my soul and assigned me a number based on the order in which I joined.
And now he can stay up late drinking beer without passing out -- because it's got caffeine!
The dangers of knowledge trigger emotional distress in human beings.
Does Drew Carey get royalty payments on this stuff?!?
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In reference to Buzz Beer (they had the concept years ago!) - "Stay up so you can get drunk all over again"
Coffee with alcohol ? Oh wait..... burp
"Sweeter flavors have definitely made an impact on 21- to 35-year-olds. ... It's a bigger part of the alcohol-drinking spectrum."
I really don't have to say anything here, right?
So we take the nasty taste of American beer, and we load it up with sugar and stuff to make us jittery. Great plan.
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Marge: I'd like a coffee
Aussie Bartender: Beer it is
Marge: No, coffee
Bartender: Beer
Marge: Cof-fee
Bartender: Be-er
Marge: C-O
Bartender: B-E
In C++, friends can touch each others private parts.
Now if they can just add nicotine to it too I can have all my vices in ONE CAN!
Easy guys, I put my pants on one leg at a time. The difference is after I put on my pants I make gold records!
at least you used to be able to count on somebody passing out...
sig.
As an inhabitant of a country that makes great beers, I have to say I find this highly appaling.
You might wonder why I even care - after all, that beer is not exported to Europe and we can still drink our own (beerlike) beer. There's just one problem - the Football WC (you call it soccer...)
Stupid FIFA has a contract with an American beer producer. Guess which. That means we can only buy American beer in the stadion.
Someone from Europe who's pissed at piss...
If a train station is a place where a train stops, what's a workstation?
At first glance I thought I saw "guano" in there...
My first real thought, however, due to the distributor was, "gross."
Immediately following that, though, I thought of a Simpsons episode, then a Futurama episode:
Homer: Uh, yeah. I need something that will keep me awake, alert, and reckless all night long.
Clerk: Well, Congress is racing back to Washington to outlaw these. [puts a bottle of pills on the counter]
Homer: [takes bottle] Sold!
[downs most of the pills on the spot]
Clerk: Hey, you can't take that many pep pills at once.
Homer: No problem, I'll balance it out with a bottle of sleeping pills. [takes another generous helping of pills]
-- "Maximum Homerdrive"
Fry: I'm never going to get used to the 31st century. [He points to his breakfast.] Caffinated bacon? Baconated grapefruit? Admiral Crunch?
-- "The Series Has Landed"
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MoonShot contains the maximum amount of caffeine allowed by law: 45mg per twelve-ounce serving. Since this is a moderate level (a cup of coffee contains 70mg), we have formulated MoonShot to be light-bodied, smooth and therefore uncommonly drinkable.
I've tried MoonShot... It's not bad, but not great. Little bit of caffeine tang, like Krank2O or Water Joe, but better masked by the beer. Tastes kinda like Rolling Rock. Weak, in other words.
If you want caffeine with your alcohol, go for irish coffee
-T
If it's made by Anheiser Busch, it's CRAP!
He tried to kill me with a forklift!
As if beer doesn't make you pee enough!
B/E! Now you can piss like the mighty Mississipp!!
Vos teneo officium eram periculosus ut vos recipero is.
Years ago, a friend of mine was brewing and thought he'd invent a recipie for Coffee Porter. Rather than read what anyone else had done, he decided to just wing it and hope for the best.
He came into work one Monday, and asked what I knew about coffee. Seems he had a bottle with dinner the night before, but hadn't been to sleep yet.
Now any homebrewer can tell you that the typical formula for 5-6 gallons of beer calls for about one pot of strong coffee for a subtle but noticable flavor.
Mark, on the other hand, took a pound of french roast, ground it to the "Espresso" setting, and dumped it into secondary for two weeks. If I remember the back-of-the-envelope calculations, we figured each bottle had 500 - 700 mg of caffiene, compared to 40-70 mg in a cup of coffee.
He gave me a bottle, and we used it for shots at a party, but that's about all I could do with it.
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They must get a nickel every time someone runs to the John. Don't we suffer enough!
"Learning is not compulsory... neither is survival."
--Dr.W.Edwards Deming
Too drunk to drive, too jittery to just sit in the back seat.
They really do make nothing but garbage. At a local beer bar I go to that brews their own bar, they will ask you to leave if you try to order a Budweiser...or anything else from that trash "brewery" and I use the term brewery loosely.
You sip beer? What are you a girl or something? Beer is for quaffing, chugging and gulping! ;D
This competes with Red Bull and Vodka and its derivitives.
Nudge, nudge. Link, link.
This isn't for carb watchers as it has 22 grams in there. Probably all sugar. 6.6 percent alcohol will be chasing the Jager Bomb crowd.
Life is the leading cause of death in America.
Is the first I've seen of the "Energy Drink Beer" series. It smells like orange soda and tastes like a Sweet Tart.
6% alcohol cancels out the stimulants though,
Amazing what artificial flavors can accomplish.
Although, yes, it's nice to see a big player pushing new product...
Personally, I'll stick with my scotch.
Am I the only one who read this and though of the Pan Galatic Gargle Blaster, which is like being whacked round the head with a gold brick wrapped in a slice of Lemon? or am I just weird?
Philip
Signatures are broken
Hmm, coffee cans on tailpipes. Could that have been the inspiration?
"Learning is not compulsory... neither is survival."
--Dr.W.Edwards Deming
The Mill Street Brewery, a local Toronto brewery, makes a coffee beer that is actually surprisingly good. I've got a couple bottles left in my fridge at the moment. Check it out:
Mill Street Brewery's Coffee Porter
I got the impression that the Purity Law was started, at least in part, by Protestants who found the effects of the gruit herbs that were used instead of hops to be less than desirable. Hops is a sedative,and squelches sexual desire, whereas many of the gruit herbs had an opposite effect.
B(E)? The geek in me reads that as "B of E" and then turns that phonetically into BFE, a vulgar initialism for "bum f* egypt," meaning the middle of nowhere.
How do companies decide to call things by stupid unpronounceable names? Pentax *istD Olympus m:robe
Then you have the stupid names which are just too close to derogatory names. I'm not talking about creative stretches of normal words like "Back Orifice" or "Internet Exploder." I'm talking about nonsense turned into the nearest possible normal words. Olympus eVolt sounds revolting.
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Isn't mixing stimulants and depressants (ginseng and alcohol) a bad thing? There are incidences of people mixing vodka and Red Bull and actually dying. I'm sure this is due to drinking an inordinate amount, but still uppers and downers together doesn't sound like good eats.
Intended to compete with the trendy sweet concotions popular on the club scenes (such as Smirnoff Ice), it will contain caffeine, guarana, and ginseng
So it's red bull beer?
On another note, will this create an entirely new type of addiction? Alcohol is already addictive, but caffeine has been proven to be addictive as well. This drink will effectively combine the addictive powers of 2 substances in one, creating a sort of uber addict. I mean, it's like combining slashdot and heroine.
I'll stick to Irish Coffee.
My personal choice as well.
The great thing about mixing stimulants and depressants is that when someone passes out they keep twitching. Talk about the life of the party.
KFG
Coffee flavored beers have been around for ages, so the concept of a caffeinated beer is hardly unique, but I can see a problem in the stability in this beer:
1.) When I brew beer (a recent hoby of mine), ph is highly important in the brewing process. The higher the acidity in the beer, the more likely the beer is to spoil. Example: put a Rolling Rock, a Bud, and a Buzzard Bay Ale in a warm room. First to go is the Buzzard. Second the Bud, and finally the Rock. Buzzard has a high ph level, bud medium, rock low.
Same with sweet beers (especially creamy stouts, where one adds lactose to the beer to make it "sweeter" since the yeast cannot ferment the lactose. But several types of bacteria can. Same problem exists with sweetened pasturized beers: minor contamination, the beer is gone.) Sweet beers, in my experiance, goes "skunk" a lot faster.
So all and all, I believe that this beer would probably spoil before someone gets the nerve to try it.
And for the asinine critics out there on my title for this post, I understand that this would most likly be a lager than stout, but poetic lisence counts for a lot...
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Hell no
:P
Potions are for quaffing, have you learned nothing ?
To quaff or not to quaff? which potion is the question.
This is the sig that says NI (again)
Alcohol and caffiene do not affect the body in "equal but opposite" ways. Alcohol generally blocks or slows the signals transmitted between neurons in the the brain. Caffiene increases your heart rate and causes you to release adrenaline. The net effect is an increased jitteryness with a decrease in motor skills. Imagine a hyper drunk. Also, both chemicals are notorious for causing dehydration.
At least you'll be awake and in a good mood while you "learn to enjoy" it
Just what the highways need at oh-dark-thirty in the A.M... a bunch of wide awake drunks behind the wheel.
Haven't any of you heard of the beer Moonshot? I've seen it around for a couple of months now.. php
http://www.realbeer.com/news/articles/news-002337
I drank it once. I had to do a shot of overproof rum to get the horrible taste out of my mouth.
The problem with putting coffee in home brew is that the oil kills the head. Now if you don't mind a beer that looks flat then use coffee it tastes great.
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Well then what about Sparks malt liquor? As a musician, I can testify to the Sparks, where drinking it gets you to loosen up but you don't stoner out and write drone-ish song. http://www.drinksparks.com/ Ya gotta love how the can is painted to look like an orange battery, with the positive and negative terminals.
I call it The Olympian - it keeps you running full speed all night (and most of the next day) like an olympic athlete.
ouzo
coke
coffee
redbull
An acquired taste, but sure to get you drunk, black you out, and keep you going!
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Why the very thought of anyone drinking such a low class beverage has CAUSED MY MONOCLE TO POP RIGHT OUT! And really, who drinks beer in this day and age anyway? Everyone should drink only expensive wine and scotch.
Why just the other day my chauffeur took a wrong turn off of the freeway and pulled me past this run down little liquor store where this shabby looking man (who by the way was driving a Pontiac! A PONTIAC!!!) who hadn't shaved for a couple of days was walking out with a bottle of Johnny Walker Red. RED LABEL?! I exclaimed, exhaling a puff of cigar smoke and tipping my top hat back in a bemused manner. WHO ARE THESE CRETINS? I practically had my driver phone the police right then and there...
Actually there's been a caffeinated beer out here in the UK for yonks - but the stuff is undrinkable.. It honestly does taste like drip-tray, there's virtually no distinction in my book..
Mill St Coffee Porter is brewed around here. It's great. It even comes in proper stubbies...
"The majority of beer drinkers, and people we are trying to approach with this product, are not terribly concerned with carbs all the time," said Lachky.
So the target audience is fat party sluts (no man is going to drink fruity beer).
in bed.
Next thing you know, they'll be putting ginko biloba into beer so that you can get drunk, do something stupid, and remember it in the morning.
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I still recommend my concoction to any beer loving coffee affectionado. Two shots of good espresso in a pint of stout. After a night of those, you get that perfect wide awake drunk going. If, of course, you can't handle a whole night of these, just one or two is enough to keep you strong until the sun comes up.
I thought the name was fitting because the night I decided to try it I was having a hard time deciding whether to make a cup of coffee or have a beer. It still sounds kind of stupid, though. Oh well.
If you want a vision of the future, imagine a youtube comments section scrolling - forever.
There's nothing more of an oxymoron than a beer snob.
~S
Now we have our choice of
Angry drunks
Sad drunks
Happy drunks
PLUS!
Hyper drunks
Chatty drunks
Oscillating drunks.
Woohoo.
And which genius at AB decided what beer needs is MORE diuretic effect.
"Win treats sysadmins better than users. Mac treats users better than sysadmins. Linux treats everyone like sysadmins."
Or something like that.
"Waste not one watt!" - CZ
Remember, Alcohol is a sedative, while caffeine is a stimulant. Mixing the 2 isn't really a good idea.
Sometimes I wish I was a plumber, then I'd know how to deal with other people's shit.
Caffeine and alcohol may not be all it's cracked up.
I once saw someone use Jolt for mix. By the end of the night he was so bombed he needed to sleep but so wired he couldn't sit still. Not a pretty sight.
At the time, he most assuredly was not in a good mood for the experience.
Cheers
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